No Ordinary Love
by Lisa Lionheart
Summary: A dark power is beginning to infiltrate the magical community of Great Britain, testing the population’s courage, loyalty, and strength. Friendships will dissolve, promises will be broken, sacrifices will be made, and lives will be lost.
1. Prologue: Meet Isabella

**A/N: OK, I know what you're thinking. _Another_ Sirius/OC story. AND the OC is a transfer student? On to the next, right? Well, I hope not. I ask that you give this story a chance. While it center arounds Sirius and my OC, Isabella, it also delves into the makings of James, Lily, and her history with Severus. ****While I am confident in the development of my characters and their stories, I know the flames will come. I welcome your reviews and your criticisms.**

**Just a note on the timeline: Though JKR hasn't said exactly when MWPP attended Hogwarts, I think most of the signs point to them starting Hogwarts in the fall of 1971. Therefore, my story starts in 1976 in the summer before their sixth year.**

**And lastly, everything you recognize is the property of the genius JK Rowling.**

**Enjoy!**

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"England. I can't believe you're really moving to England."

It took all of Isabella's strength to not roll her eyes, as it had to have been the hundredth time Lana had said this exact phrase since she had told Lana and her other best friend, Jasmine, of the abrupt decision to move just four days prior.

They were initially shocked to say the least—both cursing and unfairly growing angry with Isabella as if it were her fault, but then their moods quickly changed, thinking that it must have been a joke and did not believe Isabella until she showed them the official letter her father had received from the British Minister of Magic. Since then, the usually emotional Jasmine had accepted the move without another word of protest, while Lana had grown uncharacteristically apprehensive and continued to doubt Isabella, hoping that it was all still an elaborate scheme that involved everyone but her.

Lana's constant questioning had grown tiresome, but Isabella knew that she couldn't blame her friend this time—today was the last day she would be spending with Lana and Jasmine before she left, and although they continued to foolishly make plans as if Isabella would be visiting the States every other weekend, she had no idea when she would actually see them again. Tears welled up in her eyes at the mere thought.

"No more crying," Jasmine said sternly, having caught Isabella trying to surreptitiously dab her eyes with her napkin. "You had enough of that yesterday. You aren't gone yet, and we still have the whole day ahead of us."

Isabella frowned at Jasmine, replaced her napkin across her lap, and reached for another biscuit and jam. They may not see each other for a while, but Jasmine was right, they did have the rest of the day, and she planned to make the most of it.

It was 10:30 AM on July 4, Independence Day.

"Ironic," Lana had mused the night before, "that your last day in America before moving to England would be the 4th."

They were enjoying breakfast at a table on her backyard deck overlooking Bellport Bay. Jasmine and Lana had spent the night, and they had passed the time gossiping, reminiscing, laughing, and crying. She was surprised that they were even awake right now, considering the late hour they had finally fallen asleep, but aromas of the expansive breakfast her father had prepared had dragged them from Isabella's bedroom down to the deck. The table was laden with pancakes, Belgian waffles, scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, and every fruit and pastry imaginable, and they promptly began to force down as much as they could before it was taken away and the backyard transformed for Isabella and her father's going away party. And as if on cue…

"Alright, ladies, I think it's time you head upstairs and get ready for the day," Isabella's father said brightly as he strolled out from the kitchen.

The three of them groaned. They had grown comfortable eating breakfast in their pajamas under the warm, mid-morning sun, a light breeze blowing across the bay.

When only blank faces stared back at him, he continued. "Unless you would like to help me prepare for this afternoon's…"

The three girls shot up immediately and started heading towards the sliding door leading to the kitchen, mumbling excuses like 'curl my hair' and 'paint my nails.'

"Thanks for the great breakfast, Derrick," Lana said with a smile while passing him.

"Yes, delicious as always," Jasmine added.

Isabella stopped and kissed her father on the cheek. "Yes, thank you, dad."

Derrick winked and squeezed her shoulder before she continued into the house. Lana and Jasmine were already halfway up the stairs, so she took the time to soak in what was left of her childhood home before it was full of relatives and well-wishers.

Most of the rooms had been packed away into four small boxes that now sat by the front door—the kitchen where, as a six-year-old, she and her mother created more messes than meals with the help of her toy wand; the family room where her mother taught her exploding snap and her father showed her wizard's chess; and the magic room where she practiced her studies outside of school. All that remained were her and her parents' bedrooms. It would all be at their new home before they even Apparated and progressed through customs at the British Ministry tomorrow morning. However, if the letter had been any indication, they wouldn't need any of it.

The letter. A simple piece of parchment that had turned her life upside down just as she was setting it right again. It came at the beginning of June, just as Isabella was finishing her fifth year at the Morgana All Girls Academy of Witchcraft. She remembered returning home consumed with apprehension as her father's last letter had warned her of a serious discussion they would need to have as soon as she arrived.

After greeting her with his usual fervent hug, he remained unusually tense which slightly worried Isabella, for she could not remember a time when her father could not confidently speak his mind. He instead busied himself with moving her trunk and other bags upstairs to her room, asking about her end-of-term exams, and inquiring about her friends. When he brought up the subject of Garret, her then boyfriend, she couldn't take it anymore.

"Dad!" she had exclaimed as they both entered the family room. "What is going on? You said that we needed to have an important discussion when I got home, and I hardly think it includes Garret's summer plans."

Her father furrowed his eyebrows at the obvious annoyance in her voice, but silently walked into his office and returned with a single piece of paper. He stopped short of the armchair where Isabella was sitting, looked over the letter once more, and with a heavy sigh, handed it to her without a word.

Isabella looked over the stiff parchment quickly; a glimmering gold seal at the upper left hand corner caught her eye, bearing the words The Ministry of Magic of Great Britain. Slightly confused as to why something from the British Ministry would affect her father in such a way, a wave of anxiety suddenly swelled in her chest.

To Mister Derrick Williams, Chief Auror

Office of Magical Enforcement, United States Branch of Magic:

It is with extreme urgency that I write to you this evening concerning our state of affairs. As you are well aware, there is a distressing and frightening force currently gaining strength among our population through any means necessary. In previous years, most of this wizard's operations have remained under the radar of the general population, sparing us any problems of panic or uprising. During this time, our own Auror and Unspeakable departments were able to acquire valuable information regarding, among other things, his supporters and plans. However, in the past few months, he has arrogantly left a blatant path of death and destruction, while collecting more supporters on the way or eliminating anyone who stands in it.

After reviewing the Auror training program you have successfully created and implemented for the Branch of Magic, my advisors, department heads, and I believe that developing the same program would significantly benefit us as well, and we present to you with an offer to supervise its execution. We are well aware of the burden that such a move and subsequent project will cause and are ready to compensate you and your family in any way needed. If you have any questions or concerns, please do not hesitate to contact us. We hope to receive a response soon.

Sincerely yours,

Armand Stotch

Minister of Magic

"Move…to Great Britain?" Isabella had barely whispered as she stood and handed the letter back to her father.

"London, specifically," Derrick said with a bright smile; it faded rapidly when Isabella's dejected look didn't disappear. Sighing, he reached his arm around Isabella's shoulders, guided her to the closest sofa, and they both sat down.

"Honey, I know a move to another country is the last thing you want to endure given the events of the past few months, but when I read the letter, your mother was the first thing that came to mind; I wasn't able to do anything to prevent her—"

"Mom's death was not your fault, Dad," Isabella interjected seriously.

"I know, I know, but doing this would allow me to help prevent this sort of tragedy from happening to anyone else." Derrick began wringing his hands as he fought to hold back his tears, causing Isabella's heart to clench.

"The situation in Britain is dreadfully serious right now," he continued. "This wizard, Lord Voldemort, is stopping at nothing to execute his master plan. This offer is something I cannot turn down. And we'd be a lot closer to family, which I think we both need right now."

"But…I…." Isabella looked down as her own tears started to gather, knowing there wasn't an argument she could give without sounding selfish and remained silent for a long while.

She understood her father's sense of duty to her mother's memory, but, as her father had said, a move across the Atlantic was the last thing she expected to happen. She was just starting to get her life back together since her mother's death in mid-March, beginning to finally accept her absence and learning that it was okay to smile again.

She was sixteen and in the middle of her magical education; there were so many possibilities and dreams she had for her future at the Academy and beyond.

Then she thought about Lana and Jasmine, her best friends whom she had known since they were all three years old, and their endless secrets, memories, and adventures; how could she just up and leave them behind?

And then there was Garret. They had been together for just over a year, and their bond was a strong one.

But everything was trumped by her the memory of her mother. Isabella could not express in words how much she missed her, and it was then she realized that nothing else really mattered. Her father's mission was more important, and although it would be hard, she knew they had to move; letters could always be written and visits could always be made.

Isabella looked up at her father and grabbed his hands with a strong squeeze. "I understand."

"Isabella!"

Lana's shrill voice broke into her thoughts, and she realized she had been staring at the family pictures sitting on the mantle above the fireplace. Derrick had refused to pack them and was taking them personally tomorrow morning. She quickly wiped the tears from her cheeks, slightly annoyed at herself for being so emotional before the day had really begun.

"I'm coming!" Isabella yelled back as she hurried up the stairs.

When she entered her room, Jasmine and Lana were already in various states of undress rummaging through their clothes in their overnight bags and Isabella's closet. She laughed as she herself began undressing to her undergarments, grabbing her robe, and heading to the bathroom.

"Really you guys? The party is going to be mostly people from the Branch offices and a few relatives, meaning no one to impress."

"That's what you think…" Lana sang just as Isabella closed her bathroom door, but the latter had heard Lana and poked her head back in, her eyes narrowed.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Lana and Jasmine shared a furtive glance, apparently deciding what, if anything, they should say. Lana shook her head with a grin, but Jasmine shrugged and turned to Isabella.

"Your father owled us as soon as he knew you had told us about the move and asked that we contact some friends to invite," Jasmine blurted out.

Isabella sighed with some relief. "Oh, so just the girls from Morgana then? That wasn't a bad idea. Thanks." She made to close the door, but Jasmine continued.

"Yeah, the girls from Morgana…and a couple of boys from Merlin."

Isabella felt her stomach drop. The last thing she needed was a run-in with Garret, his friends, or any boy for that matter. She just didn't have the energy to impress or entertain them right now, nor did she want to feel like a prisoner during her last day in her home trying to avoid them.

"Don't worry!" Lana said hurriedly, seeing the worry wash over Isabella's face. "Not to make you feel bad, but do you really think Garret would show up after yesterday?"

"His parents are family friends, and his father works at the Branch! And if you invited his friends…there's a damn good chance of him showing up!" Isabella was frantic now; she could feel the heat rising to her face.

"Look," Jasmine said edgily, cutting across Isabella's frustrated grumbles and Lana's attempts to calm her down, "regardless of whether he comes or not, it is already after 11 and guests will be arriving soon, so let's just get ready and deal with it afterwards."

Lana shrugged and went back to her clothes while Isabella huffed and slammed the bathroom door behind her.

She turned the shower to the hottest setting and stepped under, wondering if she should just let herself drown.

"Merlin, Morgana, and anyone else up there," Isabella prayed desperately, "please do not let him show up." There was just no way she could face Garret so soon.

After leaving behind her best friends, breaking up with Garret was the next thing she began to dread most when the move became final. When Lana and Jasmine arrived yesterday, they waited until Derrick left for his last day at work before Isabella traveled by Floo to Garret's house, as they had done many times during their previous school breaks. He had been waiting for her in his kitchen, sitting stiffly at the breakfast table, and wringing the letter she had sent ahead in his hands. She sat down heavily across from him, but neither of them said anything or made eye contact.

She wasn't sure what made her do it, but after five minutes of tense silence, Isabella stood, walked around to his side, forced him to face her, bent down, and kissed him firmly on the lips. He hesitated for just an instant before grabbing her waist and pulling her into his lap. Wrapping her arms around his neck, Isabella deepened the kiss and reveled in the familiar sensation that tingled through her body whenever their tongues touched.

Garret's hands found their way under her robes and made their usual run up her chest and down her back. As he started rubbing the small of her back, she shifted to move closer to him and suddenly felt his firm arousal. A low guttural moan escaped his throat, and Isabella froze. She quickly stood and took a few steps back; they were both panting.

Isabella had felt like a silly tart. It was so easy to get caught up in the moment with Garret and lose all sense of reality, but now was not the time, and she felt guilty for leading him on.

"I'm sorry," Garret had abruptly said before she was able to apologize. He wouldn't quite meet her eyes. "I shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that."

Isabella felt even worse. "No, Garret, you didn't take advantage. I shouldn't have initiated—"

"So what's this job offer?" Garret interrupted as he turned away from her and back to the letter. Isabella sighed heavily, knowing the issue was dropped, and went back to her seat.

"Something or someone is gaining some dangerous power over there and they need my father's help," Isabella explained listlessly. "I really don't know the details except that he accepted, and we are going."

"And you didn't…didn't think about staying?" he asked tentatively.

"Staying? With who?"

"Yeah, either Lana or Jasmine or your Aunt Annette?"

Isabella's eyes widened in disbelief, but Garret was still not fully looking at her. "Stay here and let my father go alone? You know how close we are, especially since my mother—" A lump suddenly caught in Isabella's throat, and she tried to breathe deeply before continuing. "You know how much you and the girls mean to me, but you most of all should know that I can't leave my father either."

"I know. I'm sorry," Garret said quietly.

He reached across the table and squeezed her hand, now looking at her with fervent intensity that caused emotions to rush through Isabella and her eyes to fill with tears. She realized that this could be the last time she lost herself in his warm brown gaze. They saw each other only a couple times a month during the academic year since they attended different schools, and as such, their relationship had required a great amount of patience and trust. She lived for their weekends in Brentwood and the times when their respective headmasters held joint events for the brother and sister schools, and she had been looking forward to the many visits they had planned for the summer.

Yes, she understood that they were only sixteen-years-old and that they had their whole lives ahead of them, but she would be lying if she said she hadn't thought about marrying Garret someday in the far future. She loved him very much, and she knew he felt the same way. They would have to part for now, but who knew what would happen over the next few years. If things calmed down in England, she could eventually move back, and maybe they could continue from there. Until then, she hoped that they could at least remain friends.

Another squeeze from Garret brought her back to the present. He was still staring at her.

"I should get back," Isabella said sadly, releasing her hand from his grip. They both stood, and he walked with her to the fireplace.

"Well, be careful over there," he said softly, helping her climb in. "Let me know how you're doing?"

She smiled sincerely at him. "I promise to write as soon as I get there."

She took a deep breath, but before she could utter her destination, Garret reached in and pulled her into a soft kiss. When they parted, the green flames were already raising high around her, impatiently waiting for her instructions. She wiped the tears streaming down her cheeks as she yelled, "Home!" The last thing she saw before closing her eyes against the spinning was Garret mouthing, "I'll miss you." She was trembling with sobs on her knees by the time she returned home, and Lana and Jasmine had to help her out of the fireplace.

Isabella abruptly shut off the water, her skin scalding with a tinge of red. She used her wand to quickly dry off and style her hair to perfection before putting on her robe and walking into her room. Lana and Jasmine had finally picked outfits for the day—a white sundress for Lana and a yellow one for Jasmine—but were now charming their hair. Living with a high-level Branch official certainly had its perks; Isabella's home wasn't as closely regulated as most civilians' for such minor things as underage magic.

"You feeling better?" Lana asked hesitantly as she magicked her dark blonde tresses from curly to straight and back again.

"Much better," Isabella replied, hoping they wouldn't notice her red-rimmed eyes. She started rummaging through her closet and picked her favorite jade green sundress that beautifully offset her cinnamon skin. After a quick check of her hair and application of some light makeup, she was good to go.

"Are we finally ready?" Jasmine asked the others; she had decided to pull her chestnut hair into a sleek ponytail. "I think guests are already arriving."

And sure enough, as they made their way downstairs, they heard the many voices of friends and family greeting and laughing. When they reached the bottom, their friends from school were just walking through the front door, and Lana and Jasmine rushed forward to greet them with hugs. Isabella hung back until the last boy and Garret's closest friend, Tate Gordon, closed the door behind him, and with a significant look, told her that Garret was not coming.

She released the breath she was holding and joined the group as they made their way to the backyard.

Hours later, they were all sitting at a table, delightfully stuffed and enjoying the sunset. The afternoon had been wonderful, and Isabella had quietly thanked Lana and Jasmine again for taking the time to invite their friends. Despite the fact that she was hugged, kissed, and forced to relive every embarrassing story in her life from the countless relatives and family friends that joined their company throughout the day, she was having a good time and, at one point, had even forgotten that she would be leaving the next day. That is until Patrick Moore, the Chief Magical Officer of the Branch of Magic, stood and engaged the party in a speech.

"Dear friends, family, colleagues, and general well-wishers," he began in the confident booming voice that had always commanded reverent attention, "I don't know how many of you know Derrick well, but even if you don't, you would know that this community is losing one of its finest." There were murmurs of agreement around them. "I remember meeting Derrick as a young man, a graduate fresh out of Merlin All Boys School of Wizardry. He came straight to the Branch, walked into the Department of Magical Enforcement, where I was head at the time, and said to me 'I want to be an Auror.' 'Alright,' I had replied, 'but you do know that you have another 3 years of advanced training and studies before you can even take the test to qualify?'" This earned a few chuckles. "It was a tough one, as it is for many aspiring Aurors, but he made the decision to go through with it, and, if I were to guess correctly, hasn't looked back since.

"He excelled during his training and finished at the top of his class. Since then, he has been on a nonstop ascent through the ranks to where he is now, Chief Auror. And over time, he has used his intelligence and ingenuity to completely overhaul the training program and the department in general, making our force the most skilled and respected in the magical world. Of course, it was also during this time that he met the beautiful Estelle Jones interning from England, a smart and talented witch in her own right. I don't think any of us have quite fully recovered from her untimely passing, and frankly, never will."

There was a moment of silence, and Isabella's eyes burned with fresh tears. She couldn't look over at her father because she knew she would completely fall apart.

"It is in the memory of Estelle that Derrick moves on with his career to help our friends across the Atlantic. There is a dark force gaining strength over there, and if we must part with one of our own to help them fight back, then so be it. But Derrick, know that we will miss you, and of course, young Isabella," he said with a wink her way, "very dearly. The community will not be the same without you.

"So if you would please join me," he began, and with a wave of his hand, bottles and glasses of champagne appeared at each table, "in toast to Derrick, Isabella, and the memory of the beloved Estelle, we wish them the best of luck and everything else…and that you are able to return as soon as possible."

Everyone raised their glasses with a hearty "Here, here!" and downed their drinks. She knew it was coming, but this time she was ready for it. A barrage of hugs, kisses, and words of encouragement came at her from every direction. It was only after another hour she was free to rejoin her friends at their table, and at this point, they were all pleasantly buzzed from the copious amounts of champagne.

"Remember when Garret, Tate, and Chris snuck out of school and came to visit us?" Nina, Isabella's other dormmate from school, said as she snuggled up closer to her boyfriend, Chris. "I didn't think you guys would ever be allowed to leave your castle again."

"Yeah, but the picnic was worth it," Chris said with a laugh.

"Maybe so, but I don't think you would have been caught if you hadn't tried to sneak back on our school brooms," Lana said, slurring her words a bit. "Your faces at the sound of the alarm when you crashed into the boundaries…priceless." They all erupted into laughter.

Isabella definitely remembered that day well, and it brought a smile to her face. The three boys had traveled the few miles that separated their schools on foot and had surprised them on a Sunday afternoon with a magically packed picnic. Garret and Chris had brought Tate with them hoping that he would finally overcome his anxiety and ask Lana out. They were known to have mutual crushes on each other but neither of them had ever made a move. Nothing had happened that day, but by the looks of it now, the champagne must have given both courage, for they were now sitting close together and Tate had his arm around her shoulders.

The night sky above them suddenly erupted into a brilliant fireworks show as people around them broke into every American patriotic song known to man. Isabella was swiftly overcome by a rush of emotion—the sadness of moving away from all that she knew, the apprehension of starting anew in a completely foreign place, the comfort of knowing she would be safe with her dad, and the loneliness she felt with the absence of her mom. She began to openly sob, no longer able to hold it back. Jasmine pulled her close, and they cried together, watching the lightshow above them as it reflected magnificently on the lake.

Within the next hour, many guests began to call it a night, including their friends. With promises of seeing them soon, they Disapparated with their parents who had arrived separately. Lana and Jasmine would be returning home by Floo later.

When the last guest, Isabella's Uncle Bradley, had left, Derrick gathered his traveling coat and hat and entered the kitchen, where the girls were finishing the last of numerous dishes with a cleaning charm.

"Alright ladies," he began, "I have to head to the office for a last meeting with Patrick, but I will be back soon, and Isabella, we can finish up the packing."

He made to Apparate, but Isabella stopped him. "Wait!"

Derrick stopped mid-spin with a contorted look on his face; it was not a good feeling to hastily interrupt Apparition.

"Sorry," Isabella said quickly, "but Lana and Jasmine won't be here when you get back."

"Oh, that's right," Derrick said sadly, striding towards them. He pulled each into a tight hug before standing back. "I want to sincerely thank both of you for being such amazing friends that Isabella has been able to count on throughout the years, and especially for everything you have done over the past few months and today. I will miss you both just as much as she will."

He moved back a little to give himself room. "And know that you can visit whenever you want; just let Isabella know, and I will make all of the arrangements." He gave them a nod and a smile, and with a loud crack, he was gone.

The girls finished cleaning up and headed upstairs to collect Lana and Jasmine's things. They returned downstairs and stood silently by the fireplace in the family room; no one wanted to be the first to say good-bye.

"Well, I guess we should give you your gift first," Jasmine said, reaching into her bag and pulling out a large, heavy brown package.

Isabella quickly removed the wrapping, and extracted a brushed silver picture frame the size of their most hated History of Magic book. Within the frame were 12 smaller, differently shaped frames, all filled with moving pictures of the three of them from various ages. Some pictures changed into others, while others stayed the same, and soon those began to transform into more pictures too, which Isabella thought was a good idea, as they probably had taken hundreds, if not thousands, of photos together since they were three-years-old. Also, their full names—Isabella Marie Williams, Jasmine Lynn Stevens, and Lana Alyssa Gates—were engraved contiguously along the outer edge.

"It's exquisite," Isabella whispered, as more tears began to gather. She looked at them both, who were beaming at her, and without warning, they hugged close and began to weep.

When they parted, none of them was sure how much time had passed, but not wanting to drag out the already depressing situation any longer, Lana and Jasmine grabbed their bags as Isabella threw Floo powder into the fire, and her two friends stepped inside.

"Let's not say goodbye; how about, see you later?" Lana suggested.

"See you later, Isabella," Jasmine said with one last smile.

"Sooner than later," Isabella called back just as they began to spin. "I promise to write as soon I as I get there."

"You better!" Lana yelled, and in an instant, they had disappeared within a whirl of emerald flames.

Isabella sighed and went back to her room. She took out her wand and started to shrink her endless volumes of Muggle literature for easier packing, but an unexpected wave of exhaustion washed over her and she instead sat heavily on her bed, knowing her father would finish for her.

She set her new picture frame on her nightstand and smiled. Memories of her friends, Garret, Morgana, her parents, and today swam through her mind as she lied back against her pillows. This time tomorrow, she would be laying her head in a new home, a new land, and although she was filled with unease, with so many friends and family supporting her, she knew that deep down that she had nothing to fear.


	2. Cruel Summer

"Finally, the last box."

Isabella pulled it towards her, relieved that it wasn't as heavy as it appeared. She lifted the flaps and grabbed the first thing on top—an old but beautifully carved cherry oak frame. Turning it over, a small frown appeared at her lips as she began to read the poem she had memorized the moment she learned how to read, written in an all too familiar script.

_To my beautiful daughter, Isabella Marie Williams_

_Little girl don't you cry, everything will be ok_

_Little girl confide in me, I'll make your fears go away_

_Little girl don't lose faith, one day you will be free_

_Little girl make a wish, you'll be safe here with me_

_Little girl I am your friend, I'll always be here for you_

_Little girl take my hand, be happy, don't be blue_

_Little girl you're not alone, that always will be true_

_Little girl so sweet and coy, I'll always look after you_

_Little girl I know it's hard, but please don't you give in_

_Little girl please be strong…_

The tears gathered in her eyes and threatened to fall before she could even finish. Isabella all but threw the frame back into the box, and with a choked sob, hastily pushed it aside. It had been a very tiring day, and she just didn't have the strength to deal with the box's contents.

The current weather wasn't helping, as the stagnant summer heat was beginning to be too much to handle. According to her father, by way of the _Daily Prophet_, the unbearable weather was breaking records in Notting Hill, and in an attempt to cool herself off, Isabella trudged over to her window and opened it, hoping that a breeze would offer some relief.

None came. Sighing, Isabella wiped the sweat off her forehead as she gazed out into the city.

When the British Ministry said they would compensate in any way, they weren't kidding. After a bit of research before they left, Isabella learned that Notting Hill was one of the more affluent areas of London. Although she loved the grand views of the communal gardens and Hyde Park from the upstairs balcony, she thought the house that the Ministry had placed them in was much too lavish and extravagant for her and Derrick's taste.

There were magnificent paintings and draperies on every wall, beautiful antique furniture that she was afraid to sit on, and a perky little house-elf, Nonie, to wait on them at all hours of the day, making sure the house ran with perfect efficiency.

"So why can't she keep the house from feeling like a damn sauna?" Isabella asked herself as she continued to stand at her window waiting for a breeze.

She had endured London summers before and they were nowhere near as miserable as the summers she spent on Long Island, but unpacking all day did not mix well with the already record-breaking temperatures. She didn't want to chance using magic, as she wasn't sure how stringent the underage laws were here, and never having a house elf before and not really comfortable with the master-servant social construct, she avoided asking Nonie for help. She just wished her father would hurry home to magic the house to a more comfortable temperature.

Since they had arrived, her father had been gone everyday at endless meetings with the Minister, numerous advisors, and countless other department heads she couldn't name, leaving many elaborate protection charms on the house so Isabella couldn't leave—not that she really wanted to since she had been to London a few times before while visiting her mother's family. Regardless, the move had been made all the more hard since she had spent most of the days alone.

Her father returned home late nearly every night looking extremely tired and frustrated. She hadn't fully understood this Lord Voldemort and his actions in the magical community until her father explained all that he could before they moved. He had wanted her to completely comprehend the severity and consequent danger that his new job posed to them both. And with knowing that she could now lose her father at any moment, she wished he had never told her.

"Isabella?"

Her father's voice startled her as she turned around to face him.

"What are you doing here?" she asked abruptly. It was only four in the afternoon, the earliest her father had been home since the move.

"Not exactly the welcome I was expecting, but…" His voice trailed off as he noticed the watery look in Isabella's slightly red eyes. "Are you okay, dear?" he asked with concern as he crossed the room towards her. "You don't look so well."

"Oh, oh, it's nothing. Just a bit hot from unpacking and everything," she said, quickly looking away from him; she hated appearing weak in front of her father since her mother died. The whole ordeal was certainly taking its toll on him both physically and emotionally, and she felt the responsibility to be strong for the both of them.

Derrick gazed around and took in the newly decorated room. "And what a wonderful job you've done," he finally said as his eyes fell on the last unpacked box. He walked over and sat on Isabella's bed, reaching into the box and pulling out a frame. The picture inside was of Estelle and himself, standing in the middle of New York's Times Square. Both of them were waving frantically as cars and people zoomed by them in all directions.

"You know, this was one of your mother's favorite places to visit while we were both in our later years of schooling," he began as he continued to stare longingly at the picture.

"It was the first place she had visited when she initially arrived in the States, and in the later years, she returned to it whenever she needed to escape her exhausting Healer studies, usually dragging me with her. Why she thought it was relaxing to run off to the center of Muggle madness I'll never know, but she always had little quirks like that."

Isabella smiled sadly as she listened to her father reminisce and took a seat next to him on her bed. He turned to look at her. "Why haven't you put up any of these pictures yet?" he asked quietly.

Isabella again looked away, feeling embarrassed and ashamed. "I just haven't found a proper place for them."

Derrick considered her for a long time, grabbed her hand, and said, "It's okay, dear. It takes time to heal, and I understand if you're not ready to have the constant reminders of your mother everywhere."

Tears began to gather once again in her already tired eyes. "I…I just thought I was finally…I mean, I was just beginning to feel okay…" She trailed off, losing her train of thought. It was true; towards the end of the school year, she had begun to come to terms with her mother's death, but the recent move and subsequent loneliness had made Estelle's absence all too real again.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Isabella," her father replied, "and I know this move hasn't helped with anything, especially since I haven't been around to help you transition." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. "But it will all get better soon, I promise," he continued, and suddenly his face lit up.

"I know you haven't been able to get out, and we haven't spent much time together outside the confines of this house, so how about we both freshen up and head out to Diagon Alley?" he asked with a smile.

Isabella returned her own bright smile. She hadn't been to Diagon Alley in a long time and had wanted to visit since they had moved; she was missing the familiarity of a magical community.

"I'd love to, Dad!"

Isabella took in a deep breath as she grounded herself. She hated the feeling of Side-Along Apparition, but preferred its speed compared to flying and the lack of dirt and dust compared to the Floo. Once she was settled, Isabella took in Diagon Alley around her.

The sun shone brightly on the many old century-looking stores and cobblestone streets, and there were large, moving, and magnificent product displays in every window. Isabella was happy to be surrounded by magic again.

Isabella and her father wandered into the first appealing shop they came upon, Flourish and Blotts. It was a large building, but once inside, its size seemed to shrink due to the massive shelves filled with books stacked upon books that rose to the ceiling. Newest arrivals had their own special displays in various areas of the store. One that caught her attention was dedicated to dragons, and she immediately went towards it. She began browsing the range of books—from _Dragon Species of Great Britain and Ireland_ to _Men Who Love Dragons Too Much_. Derrick chuckled at her as she began piling one of every title into her arms.

"What?" she asked absentmindedly as she tried to balance Chinese Fireball and Norwegian Ridgeback stuffed dragons on the already teetering pile of books. "It's your fault."

And it was true. Derrick also had a fixation with dragons; small figurines had decorated many places in her childhood home, including her room, for as long as she could remember, much to her mother's chagrin. Her mother never understood her husband and daughter's fascination with the dangerous beasts, but Isabella thought they were beautiful, mysterious creatures. She laughed to herself as she remembered Lana and Jasmine's constant joking about it.

"Such a boy thing," they would always say.

Twenty minutes later Isabella and her father emerged from the bookstore with broad smiles and numerous packages containing everything having to do with dragons and one extra book, _Hogwarts, a History_; the owner recommended it once she had learned Isabella was a new student.

They decided to head to Quality Quidditch Supplies next, mostly for Derrick's benefit though; Isabella was rather indifferent when it came to the sport. She was listlessly looking over some Pride of Portree paraphernalia when someone or something ran into her at full speed, knocking her down and causing her packages to slide across the floor. Isabella landed flat on her face, and she could already feel her face bruising as she remained on the floor unmoving, mostly from having the wind knocked out of her.

"Oh my goodness! Keira, watch where you are going!" a female voice yelled above her.

She soon felt the strong arms of her father gently pulling her up. "You okay, dear?" he asked as he helped brush the dust off her robes. "Any broken bones?"

Isabella pushed her disheveled hair out of her face and looked up at her father petulantly. "Shouldn't that have been your concern before moving me?" She arched her back and winced at the pain in her chest. "Ugh, the next few days are not going to be fun," she groaned as the throbbing in her head intensified.

"Are you alright?" the same female voice from before said. Isabella turned around and saw two girls approaching her, both carrying her packages that had fallen out of her hands. They looked about the same age as Isabella and wore apprehensive smiles.

"I am so sorry," said the girl with brown hair. "It's just that the new Nimbus 1000 was on display and I had to get the first glance…"

Isabella followed the girl's gaze to the same exhibit her father was just drooling over himself.

"Keira!" exclaimed the other girl with bright red hair, "don't be so callous!"

"Well, it's the truth!" she said with a shrug. She turned back to Isabella, "Sorry again."

Isabella shook her head. "No, no it's alright; my father is the same way with broomsticks." She reached for her books, but her father took them instead.

"Take it easy for a while," he simply replied.

"Hogwarts?" the redhead said as she handed the last book, _Hogwarts, a History_, whose packaging had torn, to Derrick. "Do you go there?" she asked.

"Not yet," Isabella replied, brushing the last dustbunny from her hair. "I just moved here a few days ago and will begin my sixth year there in September."

Keira's faced brightened. "We are beginning our sixth year as well! It's a rarity to get transfer students, though. Where are you from?"

"Morgana Academy in New York," she answered with her own smile. It suddenly hit her that she would be attending a new school where she knew absolutely no one, now that her cousins were gone; it was somewhat comforting to know that she would now be able to at least recognize two people when the fall term began.

The redhead extended her hand. "Well, I'm Lily Evans," she said with a grin, "and this klutz I call my friend is Keira Townsley," she added, jerking her head to her right.

"I promise that I'm usually not such a spaz," she said through a sheepish smile. She then quickly glanced at her watch and her eyes went wide. "Shit! We were already late in meeting my mum before I came tearing through here. Lily, we gotta go!"

Lily only responded with a hard elbow and a pointed look towards Derrick. Keira immediately gasped and blushed while he only tried to suppress a grin. She grabbed Lily's arm and began hurriedly pulling her towards the door.

"Sorry for cutting this so short," she said over her shoulder. "Maybe we will see you around at Hogwarts."

"Nice meeting you!" Lily yelled as they approached the door. They were nearly gone before Lily grabbed the doorframe and poked her head back in. "Wait! We didn't get your name…"

"Isabella!" she shouted back.

"See you later, Isabella!"

Isabella turned back to her father with a puzzled look, but he shrugged and laughed. She began to laugh as well, but they quickly turned into groans.

"I almost forgot what happened," she said as she rubbed her sternum.

Her father gave her a sad look. "How about we head to that ice cream parlor across the street? It'll make you feel better."

"You know I don't need convincing," Isabella replied; she had a notorious sweet tooth.

"Oh, and speaking of Hogwarts," her father began nonchalantly as they headed towards the entrance, "I forgot to tell you, but we're heading there this Friday. I have to meet the Headmaster, and you need to be sorted."

"Sorted?"

"Into your house. You know, the one thing that determines the fate of your schooling career and probably the rest of your life," he joked.

"Oh, great," Isabella said flatly.

Derrick chuckled. "Don't worry; it's not a big deal. But your mother was a Gryffindor, so try to shoot for that."

"Shoot for Gryffindor…what does that mean? Do I have to take a test or something?" Isabella asked hastily.

"No, no," he said while laughing. "Just read the book."

Isabella frowned. She had agreed to purchase the book only because the owner had pushed it on her; she had never intended on reading it.

* * *

A high-pitched squeak was the only noise keeping Lily company as she rocked back and forth in her favorite swing. She didn't understand why the playground had always been so deserted, but she had appreciated it when she needed alone time away from home, and today was no different.

This summer had been a particularly dull one. She had just returned from a long weekend visiting Keira, but that's all her parents would allow her. Organizing visits between magical and Muggle families had always been difficult—magical parents always had a problem finding a proper form of transportation that wouldn't attract too much Muggle attention or get them in trouble with the Ministry, and Muggle families always had trouble finding magical residences, since most families made them unplottable and nearly impossible to find.

Lily's parents had enough patience to allow only one trip per summer holiday. They had been very proud of her when her letter from Hogwarts came some five years ago and had been supportive of her unique abilities ever since, but due to the tension it caused between her and her older sister, Petunia, they had been keen on keeping the family's exposure to magic as minimal as possible, which meant a lonely summer for Lily.

The past five holidays hadn't been as terrible as this one, though, but her best friend had been by her side then. Lily should have seen the signs, her friends had warned her constantly, but she had always brushed them aside, refusing to believe the worst of him. Now looking back, Lily knew she had been downright foolish for always seeing the good in Severus, but she couldn't completely blame herself—he had been a completely different person when she met him, a good person with a heavy, but kind, heart.

The Severus that existed now was not the same person who, at the age of ten, had originally introduced her to the secret world that only a lucky few would be a part of, or the boy had held her hand and kept her calm during her first anxious days at Hogwarts. He had been instrumental in bringing out her exceptional talents in Potions and Charms, and on more than one occasion, had secretly hexed the insufferable James Potter when his constant flirting had driven her to the point of near insanity.

The changes had started toward the end of their fourth year. At first, they were very subtle—he was no longer partnering with her in Potions, but with Avery or Nott instead, and he was avoiding her eyes and ignoring her waves in the corridors between classes.

As time passed, however, he was becoming more and more infrequent at their once a week study and catch-up sessions, and although at one time he had been able to convince his Slytherin friends to keep her out of their constant pureblood rants, they suddenly began to openly torment her with mumblings of "Mudblood" and other prejudice nonsense while Severus stood idly by.

Lily had returned home that summer with the fear that she was losing one of her closest friends to a force she could not compete against, but when she randomly wandered to this playground—_their_ playground—after only one day at home in Petunia's company, Severus was here, waiting for her. He had apologized for his actions, using excuses of 'stress' and 'plain stupidity,' and Lily, against her better judgment, quickly forgave him. They became closer than ever that summer, more so in some ways that now made Lily burn with humiliating fury.

The moment they returned to school this past September, it was as if that summer had not happened. Severus acted as if she did not exist throughout most of the year while growing closer and closer to his Slytherin roommates and elders—Dolohov, Avery, and Lestrange just to name a few. Lily had been able to corner him a few times between classes, dropping all pride and begging him to reconsider his current path.

"Please, Sev, _please_," she had whispered quickly one evening, after catching him in the Entrance Hall before he headed down to the Slytherin dungeons. "You can't be friends with me, okay, I get it! But this Dark Arts stuff, this pureblood mania isn't you!"

She couldn't quite read his eyes, though she was sure there was something like remorse passing through them. The rest of his expression remained stony, however, and he had pushed past her without a word.

Lily was naïve enough to believe she could still change him, and she continued to corner him between classes, send him letters via owl, and sneak up on him in the library. Keira, Jane, and Harietta had called her a fool many times, but she did not care. She knew it would be easier to talk to him when summer came, but that was before he had destroyed what remained of their weakening friendship with the utterance of a single word.

Severus had called her a Mudblood in front of the entire fifth year after their Defense Against the Dark Arts theory O.W.L. Everyone around her only heard him say a repulsive slur, but Lily knew it meant much more. It had negated every memory they had together and every promise he had made to her. He had allied himself with the very people who would rather see her dead than share in the gift of magic. She knew that he had regretted it the minute it left his lips by the look in his eyes, but it didn't matter to her—he had said it. Their friendship was over.

"Oh, Sev," she whispered shakily, rubbing her eyes quickly and refusing to cry. She was now sitting still in her swing. "What's happened to you?"

"Simply pathetic."

Lily's head snapped up at the sound of the voice. Petunia was staring down at her with a sneer.

"What did you say?" Lily asked, glaring back at her.

"Pathetic," Petunia repeated, "you are pathetic for crying over a boy, _especially_ that Snape boy."

"You shut your mouth!" Lily spat at her. She stood up so fast that Petunia took a couple of steps away from her. "Besides, I am sure I have heard you cry after Vernon accidentally sits on you. Is that considered the same thing?"

Petunia pursed her lips and glowered back at Lily. "At least I have someone, someone to spend my days with, unlike you—spending your days alone, hoping your precious _Sev_ will come for you. Well guess what? He isn't coming!"

"I would rather be alone than with that fat oaf you call a boyfriend!"

Petunia continued as if not hearing her. "I always knew you were a freak, but if someone as revolting as Snape doesn't even want to talk to you, you must be the biggest one of them all at your loser school."

Lily reached around, grabbed her wand that was stowed in her back pocket, and pointed it right in Petunia's face, fury coursing violently through her. She never thought she could ever hate her sister, but these days it was getting harder and harder to 'consider her feelings,' as her parents had put it, and not blast her into oblivion. Her abominable boyfriend of the past year, Vernon Dursley, only increased the hostility between the sisters that began when they first met Severus and Lily got her letter from Hogwarts. Vernon was a loud, disgusting, and arrogant man, and Lily knew Petunia had only started dating him and bringing him around to get attention.

Stumbling slightly, Petunia backed away quickly. "Put that, that _thing_ away. I know you can't use magic outside of school." Her voice quivered a bit, betraying the confident air she was trying to assume.

"There are exceptions for magic caused by intense, uncontrollable emotions, such as anger or hate."

A small squeak issued from Petunia's throat, and Lily smiled with satisfaction, lowering her wand.

"But of course," Lily said lightly, "I could _never_ hex my dear sister. What kind of person would that make me?"

Petunia looked as if she wanted to answer, but glanced briefly at Lily's wand still tightly gripped in her hand, and shut her mouth instead.

After a moment she said, "I only came down here to tell you that Mum and Dad want you back at the house. We are expecting Vernon and his parents at six." She shot one last nasty look at Lily, turned on her heel, and walked toward the main path leading back to the neighborhood.

Lily watched her sister go before sitting back down on the swing, forcing herself to calm down before going home. She would love nothing more than to sit at the dinner table tonight and hint at her life at Hogwarts as a witch, which annoyed Petunia because she feared Vernon would leave her if he ever found out there was an 'abnormality' in their family. However, tonight was the first time her parents would be meeting the Dursleys, and Lily loved and respected her Mum and Dad too much to do or say something that might embarrass them.

A rustling noise from behind startled her, and she whipped around, looking for the source. A large bush was shaking, and she suspected that a rabbit must have disturbed it.

She stood and stretched her arms high above her, knowing her parents were expecting her soon. As she made her way towards the path leading home, the same rustling sounded behind her, but when she turned around again, Severus was staring back at her. She jumped slightly at the sight of him, unsure of whether or not she was pleased to see him.

He looked a lot like his old self—the Severus she knew—in his oversized smock and shorts, not the menacing form he tried to impose in his black school robes.

"Lily," he said breathlessly and started making his way towards her. For reasons unknown even to herself, Lily began slowly backing away.

"Wait, Lily, don't—we need to talk," Severus said desperately as he closed the gap between them.

"I have nothing to say to you," she lied, turning away from him, "which I thought I made clear on the train ride home."

"But I have so much to say to you," Severus said firmly.

Lily whipped back around as anger began rising again, replacing the surprise and unease she felt when first seeing him.

"Oh, you've said plenty already!" she snapped. "You don't say a single word to me all year, but you certainly made up for it that day, didn't you?"

The color drained from Severus' face as he stood stock-still.

"We shared such a great summer last year, and then you throw it all away! You betrayed me, Severus; you humiliated and betrayed me in front of everyone!" she yelled, her voice suddenly breaking.

He reached out for her, but she turned away from him and forced herself to calm down; she would not let him see her cry. After taking a few deep breaths, she faced him again.

"Then you come here today, thinking we can just talk and everything will be ok? Everything is ruined, Severus. You've chosen your side—"

"You have no idea the kind of pressure I am under," he interrupted, perhaps more forcefully then intended. He paused for a moment before continuing in a more controlled voice. "You know I would never intentionally hurt you."

"But you did."

Severus stared intensely at Lily and remained silent. She had finally calmed down and was despondently looking back at him; she knew there was nothing left to say.

"I guess seeking you out was a mistake," Severus said quietly at last. He gave her one last fleeting look before turning and walking away.

Lily began making her own way back home, sighing in resignation that this would certainly be the worst night of the summer yet, between replaying this meeting with Severus repeatedly in her mind and dinner with the Dursleys. At least she would now be distracted enough to not cause her parents any trouble.


	3. When Worst Comes to Worst

Rolling green hills turned into dark, dense forests as the Hogwarts Express propelled north. Isabella was confused as to why the whole train was commissioned when she, her father, and two escorts were the only passengers, but she did love the views the ride provided, and it was a nice break from Side-Along Apparition. However, as enjoyable as the ride was, she could not help feeling anxious.

To prepare for the trip, she had begun reading _Hogwarts, a History_, and despite her early assumptions, the book turned out to be an interesting read. She originally had started reading just for information on the four houses, but before she knew it, she had finished the whole book—or at least what she could, as it was continuously updating itself and recording current events.

According to her reading, members of her mother's house, Gryffindor, were esteemed for their courage and bravery. However, she found this slightly ironic, recalling the countless occasions she had to save her mother from spiders and other creepy crawlers.

Ravenclaws had their intelligence and wit, Hufflepuffs, their loyalty, and Slytherins were ambitious and cunning. She thought all were impressive traits to have and was unsure of where she would be placed. And then the sorting itself—done by a hat? Isabella couldn't think of anything more silly…or disturbing, really. The thought of a hat being able to 'read' you was a bit unsettling.

"Did you finish the book?" her father's voice broke into her thoughts.

Isabella turned towards him; he was just finishing another one of his endless reports. "For the most part, but it's constantly adding new stuff, so I figured I'd stop for a while."

"Did it have anything on Albus Dumbledore?" he asked while rubbing his temples.

"Tons. He's the Headmaster; that's who you're meeting with right?" Derrick nodded. "What's he got to do with the program?"

"Apparently, he is one of the leading figures in the movement against Voldemort, and the one who suggested that the Ministry recruit me."

"But…?"

Derrick shook his head and grinned. "Word around the office is that he is a bit eccentric. Nice…but weird. He was a professor in your mother's years; she said he was the best."

"Well, at least it would make things more interesting," Isabella mused.

One of their escorts suddenly opened the compartment door. "Excuse me, Mr. Williams, but we'll be arriving in Hogsmeade within the next ten minutes."

"Thank you," Derrick replied and began packing his things with a sigh; it was then Isabella noticed that he looked more exhausted than usual.

"How about we take a small vacation before my term starts?" Isabella suggested; she had two weeks before school started. "You definitely need one."

A sad smile grew at his lips. "As much as I agree, I don't know if it that will be possible…but I promise to do the best I can."

Isabella smiled and looked back out towards the bright sky as the train began to slow down.

Twenty minutes later, she and her father were trudging up a hill in a horseless carriage towards a massive castle. Isabella simply stared in awe at the grounds and the great, grey building before her, and it only seemed bigger once they entered. It was fitting, though, Isabella thought, over 500 students attended the school, while Morgana was home to only 200 at the most.

Large moving portraits and paintings covered the walls, and their inhabitants watched them closely. Four enormous hourglasses stood at the end of the entrance hall, each one filled with dazzling ruby, emerald, topaz, or sapphire jewels, and bounded by a large statue of a famous ancient wizard on each side. Isabella was already spellbound, and this was just the entrance; she could actually feel the history she had just read about.

"Welcome!" came a booming voice, startling Isabella out of her trance. She followed it to a tall, thin figure descending the grand marble staircase just to the left of the hourglasses. He was wearing midnight blue robes and a matching hat, both covered in stitched silver moons. A long, graying auburn beard extended from his chin, outdone only by the length of his hair, and she could make out light blue eyes behind half-moon spectacles as he got closer. Isabella immediately recognized him as Albus Dumbledore from her Hogwarts book.

"Mr. Williams, so very nice to finally meet you," he greeted Derrick when he reached them. "I hope your trip was enjoyable?"

"Very much so," he replied. "And please, Mr. Dumbledore, call me Derrick."

"Only if you call me Albus," he countered. He then turned to his other guest. "And you must be young Isabella," he began as he shook her hand. "You are the exact duplicate of your dear mother."

Isabella gave a small smile. Although her cinnamon complexion matched her father's, every last one of her other features, from her raven hair and high cheekbones to her light brown eyes and knobby knees, she had received from her mom, and she was sure she'd be reminded of it until her dying day.

"Well, come, come up to my office to officially start some business," he suddenly exclaimed as he clapped his hands.

Within five minutes, they were standing on a moving circular staircase before entering Dumbledore's office. It was a large room, filled with numerous odd trinkets and books. Portraits of former headmasters and headmistresses hung on the walls, and a beautiful red and gold phoenix perched atop a grand oak desk. Dumbledore walked to his seat and conjured two black chintz armchairs and three tall glasses of pumpkin juice. Once they were all settled, he began again.

"I'd like to begin with sincerely thanking you for uprooting your entire lives for the sake of our little country, especially you, dear Isabella," he said in a serious voice. "I was once a teenager, believe it or not, and understand that it would be particularly difficulty for you to do so."

Isabella wasn't sure what to say so she just drank more juice.

"But before your father and I begin our boring affairs, I think we should get you sorted," he continued with a glance to his left.

Isabella followed his gaze to a tattered black hat sitting atop an equally battered stool; the Sorting Hat looked just as described. With a flick of his wand, Dumbledore lifted the hat into the air and guided it to Isabella's head where it landed softly. It sat there for a few seconds before anything happened.

_Ahh, don't be nervous, dear; believe me, I am the last thing you should be worried about at this school._ It was then Isabella released the breath she hadn't realized she had been holding.

_Hmm, you are a very intelligent young woman; Ravenclaw would be a very good fit. But there is something else…something that has only been made apparent in the past few months. I see a sense of fearlessness and determination helping you through some recent tragedies and major life changes…_ "Yes, yes, I think Gryffindor would be the perfect fit!"

The last was said aloud, causing her to open her eyes and see her father and new Headmaster applauding.

"I couldn't imagine you in any other house," Dumbledore commented with a bright smile as he levitated the hat back to its resting place. Her father grabbed and squeezed her hand tightly.

"Now," Dumbledore continued briskly, "I think a tour of the castle and its grounds would be very appropriate for you so you don't look as lost as the first years at the start of term."

The door creaked open behind her, and Isabella turned to see a witch enter his office. She had a pleasant but stern looking face, and her graying black hair was pulled back into a tight bun and topped with a black hat.

"This is Professor McGonagall, who will be instructing you in Transfiguration and is also Head of Gryffindor House," Dumbledore introduced. "And so, Isabella, if you please, the professor will show you everything you need to know to make your first official day at Hogwarts a memorable one."

Isabella nodded, still too nervous to speak, gave her father a hug, and followed Professor McGonagall out of the office and into the depths of her new school.

* * *

"Have a good night, dear," Derrick wished his daughter, accompanied with a kiss on her forehead.

"Thanks, Dad, you too. Don't stay up too late," she joked, knowing he would be lucky to get in a couple hours of sleep before heading back to the office the next morning. Apparently the meeting with Dumbledore had been immensely successful, but it meant there was a lot more work to be done.

"I promise I'll try."

Isabella smiled and began her way upstairs to her room. They had just returned home, and it was well after one in the morning. The ride back home had been mostly uneventful, as she had fallen asleep immediately after settling in the compartment.

It had certainly been a long day; she didn't think a tour of Hogwarts would take so long, but she soon learned that there was a lot to experience. Professor McGonagall showed her the Gryffindor common room and her dormitory that she would share with four other girls. They then proceeded to the rooms where she would have her classes, and then out to the Quidditch pitch that the professor seemed the most excited about; Isabella felt it was best not to mention her ambivalence.

They then went back to the professor's office to discuss her class schedule for the school year. Isabella discovered that she was slightly ahead in Arithmancy and Transfiguration, much to McGonagall's surprise and satisfaction. When asked what career she was thinking about pursuing, Isabella became nervous.

She believed that a sixteen-year-old really had no idea what to do with the rest of her life, but she had to admit that she had always wanted to follow in her mother's footsteps and become a Healer. As such, McGonagall suggested taking N.E.W.T. level Transfiguration, Potions, Charms, Herbology, and Defense Against the Dark Arts to fulfill Healer requirements, along with Arithmancy to keep her options open just in case she changed her mind. Isabella was flattered at how the professor believed she could take on such a heavy load, but she wasn't sure how she was going to survive the year.

The day ended with the four indulging in a delicious dinner in the Great Hall, her father signing a permission slip allowing her to journey into Hogsmeade on appropriate weekends, and both Dumbledore and McGonagall insisting that Isabella contact them with any concerns or questions.

Yes, it had certainly been a long day; Isabella hoped that trips to and from Hogwarts in the same day were not common because she was sure she could not sit on a train for over twelve hours for a long while.

She changed into her pajamas and stepped into her bathroom, enjoying the feeling of the cold tile on her feet. She pulled her hair back into a loose ponytail and washed her face. Looking into the mirror as she dried her face, she admired just how much of her mother was in her features. Besides the small bit of stubborn bruising that remained under her left eye from her fall in Diagon Alley, the resemblance was unmistakable.

She admired everything about her mother—her beauty, grace, wisdom, and compassion; she hoped to grow into just half the woman her mother was. And she was definitely well on her way—proud to be in the same house and career path, and although she was anxious about the big shoes she had to fill, she knew there was no longer any reason to be afraid.

She walked back into her room and over to the box she had been neglecting since their move. She reached in and grabbed a random frame; it was a picture of her mother and her on the steps of Morgana Academy. Isabella was eleven years old, and it was her first day. She was holding her wand tensely and wore an apprehensive smile, but her mother was beaming proudly.

Isabella walked back towards her bed and placed the picture on her bedside table next to the sleeping and slightly snoring figure of a Chinese Fireball. After extinguishing her lamp, she climbed into bed and curled into her warm blankets. She fell asleep staring at the picture and with a smile on her face; it was the best night of sleep she had had since the move, with dreams of Hogwarts swirling through her head all the while.

* * *

The rushing by of fireplaces began to slow down, and Isabella opened her eyes and braced herself. Next to her, she felt her father do the same. They were on their way to a dinner hosted by Derrick's colleague and family, who wanted to properly welcome them, and, Isabella suspected, to give Derrick and said colleague a suitable excuse to take the evening off.

They finally stopped in a very large fireplace looking out into an expansive sitting room. Standing before them was a family of three—a tall, wiry man with graying brown hair that looked about her father's age, a pleasant looking woman with jet black hair styled elegantly in an bun, and a younger man who was built just like his father except for his hair, which was like his mother's and extremely messy.

"Derrick!" the older man boomed, shaking her father's hand and pulling him out of the fireplace, "you made it! Good to see you." He then turned to his other guest. "And this must be Isabella. Good to finally meet you; Derrick has said so much about you." Isabella smiled uneasily as he helped her into the room.

"Thank you for having us over, Edward," Derrick said as he performed a scouring charm on himself and his daughter. "Isabella, these are the Potters; Edward, who is Head Auror, his wife, Clarice, and his son, James," he explained, gesturing to each individual in turn.

Isabella smiled at all three of them. "Nice to meet you all, and thank you again for having us over."

"Not a problem at all," Clarice said. "I daresay that we could all use a break from reality for a bit. Excuse me, I should get back to the food." She then turned and headed to the kitchen.

"Yes, and I need to go over a few work things with Derrick while your mother is distracted," Edward said to James with a wary glance towards the kitchen. "James, could you entertain Isabella until dinner?"

"Sure," James said in a deeper voice than what Isabella was expecting. She also noticed a hint of insolence in his voice, and she felt a mix of embarrassment and slight hostility toward him at once. It wasn't her fault that she and her father were invited to dinner. If she had her choice, she would still be at home reading the rest of the novel of a letter Lana and Jasmine had sent her filled with gossip since they had started school almost a week ago.

James silently led her into a different sitting room that did not appear as formal as the one she had arrived in. The whole house had the same type of décor as her own—lush draperies, extensively carved antique furniture, and an overall air of superior sophistication. However, Isabella was sure that this was by choice since Mrs. Potter exuded refinement and old money.

She took a seat on a plush maroon loveseat while James sat across from her. Now that she was able to get a proper look at him since arriving, she could not help but notice how attractive he was, despite her slight annoyance with him. His hair could definitely use some taming, but its distinct color contrasted sharply yet nicely against his pale skin. His eyes were a clear hazel behind his glasses, and although he was wearing a black polo shirt and jeans, she could tell by his arms that he kept in shape. She was sure it was through Quidditch, as most of her guy friends from Merlin who played the sport had the same build.

"So," James said, forcing Isabella out of her thoughts, "a Yank, huh? From where in the States do you come from?"

Isabella was sure he already knew where she was from but felt it was a decent start at conversation. "Long Island, New York," she replied.

James let out a low whistle. "That accent of yours is going to make you stick out like a sore thumb on the first day of school." A tiny sneer crept across his lips.

Isabella's eyes narrowed a little.

He laughed out loud. "Oh, come on, I am just kidding," he said genially. "If you don't loosen up, you're never going to make it through your first day at Hogwarts."

"I think I will do just fine, thanks," Isabella said shortly. She was bothered that this guy was already getting under her skin.

"Are you joking?" James asked incredulously. "I am sure Hogwarts is nothing like your old school. Between its endless corridors, towers, classrooms, and hidden shortcuts that you have to learn to navigate, you have the teachers, the ghosts, Peeves, those disgusting Slytherin gits—"

"Look, if you are trying to scare me, it won't work. I visited Hogwarts a few days ago with my father, and while he met with Dumbledore, I was shown around the school by Professor McGonagall."

"Oh," James said, sounding somewhat defeated. He then perked up. "But you still have to be sorted, and with the first years, no less! That should be embarrassing enough."

A sly smile played across Isabella's lips. "Too bad that I've already been sorted then."

James look deflated once again. "Well?"

"I'm in Gryffindor."

"Great!" James said brightly, his whole demeanor towards her changing at once. "Looks like I will be able to be seen with you around school then."

"Goodness, are you always this arrogant?" Isabella asked, though with a small laugh.

"Arrogant?" he replied with feigned offense, "I'd call it confidence. Nothing wrong with being confident."

"Well then are you always this annoyingly confident?"

"Hey, hey now," James said, "You don't want to insult your only friend so far. Who else are you going to get to show you the ropes, the real things about Hogwarts that you need to know that McGonagall could never tell you?"

Isabella shrugged. "I figured you wouldn't want to be associated with someone who would 'stick out like a sore thumb,'" she said mockingly.

"Did I say that?" he asked dismissively. "What I meant is that your accent is incredibly sexy," he said huskily, waggling his eyebrows.

Isabella rolled her eyes but laughed all the same. "You are ridiculous."

"Thanks."

"Besides, I already met a couple of people who I am hoping will show me around, though if they are in different houses…" She trailed off, talking more to herself and remembering James' change in manner when he learned she was in Gryffindor. Were people in different houses normally so hostile toward each other that they couldn't even talk to or befriend each other?

"Who did you meet?" James asked quickly.

"Just a couple of girls, Lily and Keira, a little over a week ago in Diagon Alley. Do you know them?"

"You met Lily?" James asked, his voice suddenly going soft.

"Uh, yes," Isabella replied, slightly confused. "She was very nice. Do you know them?"

"Yes, they are in Gryffindor as well," he said somewhat distractedly.

He was now staring at the floor and very quiet, which Isabella thought must have been an unusual trait for him, if the past fifteen minutes had been any indication. The comfortable atmosphere they had begun to build between them shifted as soon as she mentioned Lily and Keira, though she was sure it was mostly due to Lily. What could have caused James to go so quiet? She was starting to feel awkward at the sudden stillness between them, when it hit her.

_They must have been girlfriend and boyfriend_, she thought. But by the look on James' face, that was no longer the case. Isabella now felt like an idiot, even though she knew there was no way she would have known not to mention an ex-girlfriend who James so obviously still cared about. She knew he wouldn't open up to her, but she had to break the silence and asked anyways.

"James, did something happen—" She was cut off by the loud chords of the doorbell.

James' head rose sharply towards the front door with a puzzled look on his face as his mother emerged from a hallway donning an apron.

"Were you expecting someone, dear?" Clarice asked her son.

"No, but it would have to be someone who knows about the wards, right?" he replied, standing up. When she nodded, he added, "Then don't worry. I'll get it."

"Thanks, dear." Clarice turned and headed back towards the kitchen as James approached the door. After some muttering and a tap on the knob with his wand, he pulled the door open.

"Sirius," James said with surprise. "What are you doing—" but he was cut off. By what, Isabella did not know. She could see into the foyer but could not see who was on the other side of the threshold due to her angle.

A male who looked the same age as James finally stepped into the house and dropped his large duffle bag unceremoniously on the floor; the two boys then hugged for a time longer than teenage males would normally allow. Isabella heard Clarice entering from the hall again.

"James, who is it?" she asked. When she finally emerged in the foyer, she gasped and rushed forward. "Oh Sirius," she said softly, pulling him into a motherly hug. "I can't believe you left…"

"Mum, _please_," James said edgily with a significant look. Clarice slowly let go of Sirius.

"Yes, well, now you are here, and that is all that matters," she said quickly. "Go ahead upstairs and relax, sleep, do whatever you need. James, help him upstairs with his trunk, but you return downstairs. Dinner will be ready soon, and you have a guest."

"Yes, Mum."

Clarice went back to the kitchen as James pointed his wand and said, "_Locomotor trunk_!"

Sirius hitched his duffle over his shoulder, and they both made their way towards the staircase. As they crossed the entrance to the sitting room Isabella was still sitting in, Isabella was able to get a full look at this unexpected guest.

Sirius was dressed and groomed as if he had been well cared for, but his slow gait, slumped shoulders, and grimace told an entirely different story. He looked ragged and exhausted.

Their eyes met when Sirius realized there was someone else in the room, and his eyes narrowed. Isabella hastily dropped her gaze and felt her face burn with embarrassment. When she heard their heavy steps on the staircase, she looked up, knowing she had just witnessed a very private moment she should have never seen, but she was intrigued all the same.

* * *

This had definitely been the longest day of Sirius' life.

Just twelve hours ago, he was practically running down the path of his former home in fear of his life, and now he was sitting on the second-story balcony off James' bedroom, clutching his countless empty glass of firewhiskey. His body ached terribly and cried for sleep, but as much as he tried, his mind wouldn't let him. It continued to relentlessly replay the day's events over and over, causing Sirius to grow even sadder and angrier.

August had begun as an unusually tense month in the Black household. Sirius had managed to avoid his parents and other family by spending the beginning of the summer holiday with James at the Potter household, but he reluctantly returned home at the start of the month at his mother's demands—she had claimed there were very important family matters to discuss.

The Black family's support of pureblood elitism was well known, and Sirius' contempt for his family and opposition to their views was no secret either. Ever since being the first in the many generations to be sorted into Gryffindor and befriending half-bloods and Muggle-borns alike, his parents had always believed that he needed to make a more determined effort to prove that he was proud of the Black family name and heritage, but Sirius realized at a young age that it was not the path he wanted to take. As such, his homelife had been hell; he was always at the mercy of his family's ridicule and verbal abuse.

Now at the age of sixteen and less then one year from becoming of age, his parents had grown impatient with his disrespect and resistance, and they believed that he needed to start putting things in proper prospective.

Voldemort, still unknown among most of the magical community, was gaining strength everyday, and he was in constant need of new supporters to help carry out his more elaborate plans. The older sons and daughters of his parents' friends, brainwashed from the day they were born, were all too eager to help the Dark Lord by starting chaos at Hogwarts; even his younger brother, Regulus, at the immature and impressionable age of thirteen, had agreed, but Sirius had downright refused.

Over the next week, as his mother and father harassed and threatened him daily, he had realized what he needed to do, and had been in constant contact with James, whose family was more than willing to take him in.

So today, after packing his things, he faced his parents one last time. He cursed his mother and father, his family and everything the Black name stood for, grabbed his bag, and left. He was sure his mother would follow him out and obliterate him into a million pieces, but no one came. Without a single look back, he hopped on the Knight Bus and was at the Potters' welcoming home within the hour.

When he arrived, James opened the door, and when it was obvious that Sirius had been crying, giving James all he needed to take the mickey, his best friend did not say a word. James gave him a hug, grabbed his trunk, and brought him in the house. He led Sirius to his patio, and after the Potters' company had left, they shared a bottle a firewhiskey James had nicked from his father's liquor cabinet.

When Sirius had a couple drinks in him, he began to talk as his nerves calmed down. He didn't even know what all he talked about, that he had all of those feelings inside of him, but he was glad that James was there to listen to it all.

But again, that was over twelve hours ago, and here he was, still sitting on the balcony, staring at the Potters' immaculate backyard below. It was well after 3:00 in the morning; James had long gone to bed, but he, Sirius, still couldn't sleep.

He let out a frustrated sigh as he slammed his glass down on the table. Running his hands roughly through his hair, he grinned weakly as he looked up at the waning moon. Remus would look dreadful when he arrived tomorrow, but Sirius could not help feeling relieved that he himself had at least another month before dealing with Remus' transformation.

Sirius stretched up his arms and closed his eyes before relaxing back into his chair. His mother blasting him off the family tree was the last thing his mind replayed before his body finally gave into its exhaustion…

"WHAT IN THE BLOODY HELL!"

Sirius jumped up from his seat, still cursing under his breath as the ice-cold water began to soak through his clothes. He turned around saw James holding a large empty bucket and laughing so hard that he had tears streaming down his cheeks.

"What the hell was that for, James?" Sirius asked as he began taking off his soaked-through clothes.

"Serves you right!" James finally replied after his laughter calmed down. "I've been standing here, poking and prodding you, saying your name to wake you up for the past five minutes. This is the only thing that I knew would work."

James' eyes fell on the nearly empty second bottle of firewhiskey, and he frowned: they had just opened it when James went off to bed.

"But now I see why. Surprised you aren't puking your guts out, though." He grabbed the empty bottles and glasses and headed back into his room.

"Because I, unlike you, am a real man and can hold my liquor as such," Sirius said with a smirk, though he couldn't ignore the pain throbbing against his temples.

"And wake me up for what?" he asked at James' retreating back, but his own question was answered when he saw the rising sun hanging low in the eastern skies; he couldn't remember falling asleep.

"Look," James began as he emerged from his room, this time clutching a towel and throwing it to Sirius, "Mum is already awake and making breakfast. You can get away with sleeping another couple of hours because you're '_still so upset_,' according to her."

Sirius scoffed at James' motherly tone as he followed his friend back into the bedroom. He headed toward the second bed and sat down heavily, lucky to be able to sleep off some of his hangover a little longer.

"Don't get too comfortable, though," James warned. "My mum will get suspicious if you're in bed _all_ day." He finished getting dressed and headed towards the door. "Just get in a few more hours before Remus and Peter get here."

Sirius sat up again, immediately regretting it as the pain in his heavy head pounded intensely. "I still don't understand why you invited them. I don't need everyone coddling over me."

James turned back towards him. "Hey, be grateful," he said in an uncharacteristically serious tone. "We're all you've got now."

"Thanks," Sirius muttered with a sad smile.

James smiled back before closing the door behind him. Sirius lied back down, hoping that his mind would let him escape reality for at least a couple more hours.

* * *

A few days later, Sirius sat in the summer sun around the pool with James, Remus, and Peter, all nearly dying from boredom. The Potters' large house and expansive grounds proved entertaining for exploring for only a couple of days before it got old. They all were itching to head into Muggle London and Diagon Alley, but James' father, being Head Auror, had been vehemently against them going anywhere without him. "It's getting really dangerous out there," was all he would say before casting complex protection charms around the property and heading off to work.

"Hogwarts letters are here!" called Clarice as she came out through the back door carrying a large tray laden with a jug of chilled pumpkin juice, glasses, and a stack of letters.

"Thanks, Mum," James said as she approached and handed him the tray. The other three boys muttered 'thank yous' as well.

She looked around at their glum faces and sighed. "Look, I know you'd all love to get out of the house, but you know Edward would never forgive me. I don't even feel safe going out on my own," she said sympathetically.

When no one responded, she sighed again. "Well, at least you have one guaranteed trip to Diagon Alley to get your school supplies." The boys remained silent, staring off into various directions. Clarice threw her hands up into the air in frustration and walked back to the house.

"That's the problem with having a dad for an Auror," James began as he tossed each of the other three their letters, "you always know the real danger of what's out there."

"Better knowing the truth than living in ignorance or believing the lousy _Daily Prophet_, which keeps ignoring these random but consistent disappearances," Remus said as he tore open his letter, the familiar silver Prefect badge falling into his hand.

"Hey! My mum works there!" Peter yelled while throwing his crumpled envelope at Remus. The ensuing scuffle between Peter and Remus and James' shouts of laughter went unnoticed by Sirius who was staring at his unopened Hogwarts letter with extreme apprehension.

Sirius had always considered Hogwarts his true home, a haven from the hell that was number 12 Grimmuald Place, but he knew this year would be entirely different. His story of running away from home and abandoning his family would be well known among the pureblood families by the time fall term began, and he knew their children would no longer be throwing empty threats his way. Now being an official blood-traitor made him a prime target their Dark Arts practice.

"Hello! Padfoot…"

His head shot up at the sound of his name to see the other three staring at him. "Sorry," he muttered. "What were you saying, Prongs?"

"Nothing too important, obviously," James said, feigning offense. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing, nothing at all," Sirius said quickly. He felt he had done enough emoting over the past few days.

James smirked. "Well, this should cheer you up," he said while tossing another letter towards Sirius.

The latter scowled at the familiar script on the envelope; it was the fourth letter from Daphne since his arrival. It baffled him how her owl was able to find him so quickly. Just as he had done with the previous three letters, he threw it to the side without even opening it. Though he knew he would regret it, he didn't want to deal with her until they were back at Hogwarts.

"Why don't you just break up with her?" Remus asked as he stood and undressed to his swimming trunks.

Before Sirius could answer, Peter chimed in. "Yeah, three months…it's the longest you've had a girlfriend yet, and you obviously have no need for her."

"Well, you still need _some_ things from her," James added with a grin, "but certainly not the whole package." All four boys roared with laughter.

Sirius let his mind wander to his girlfriend, as Peter had annoyingly reminded him, of three months. Daphne Owens. She was regarded as one the most beautiful girls in the school. That, combined with being the girlfriend of one of the most wanted guys at Hogwarts, one would think she would be quite the conceited snob. However, the complete opposite was true—Sirius had quickly come to learn that she was the neediest, most insecure girl he had ever met, constantly requiring assurance that 1) she was pretty and 2) he was interested in only her.

The sound of Remus jumping in the pool brought Sirius out of his thoughts. He shook his head fervently, trying to focus on enjoying his last week with his best friends before heading back to Hogwarts. At least he had the trip to Diagon Alley the next day to look forward to.

Sirius opened his last letter hastily, not recognizing the writing on the envelope. He unfolded the letter and looked at the closing first—it was from his Uncle Alphard. He couldn't remember the last time he had seen Alphard or the last time he was even mentioned by any of his family.

_Sirius—_

_I have just heard of the recent developments and would like to give my sincerest congratulations. I always had a feeling that you were different from the rest of the family from the moment you were able to talk. If you hadn't realized, I don't completely agree with most of the family regarding pureblood elitism, and as such, haven't been around as much. Not at all, actually, now that I think about it._

_Anyways, I figured that abandoning the family also meant abandoning your pending inheritance. Getting by is the last thing I believe you should have to worry about in these dangerous times. As such, enclosed is the paperwork you need to complete in order to access a new account in Gringotts that I have opened in your name. No thanks is necessary, just please spend it wisely._

_Lastly, a piece of advice. If the news of you becoming a 'blood- traitor' has reached me, then it has certainly spread sufficiently throughout the pureblood families. This Dark Lord is growing in strength and numbers everyday, including, as I am sure you are aware of, students at Hogwarts. You are in no serious danger while Dumbledore is Headmaster, but all the same, I implore you to keep your head down. Your brave stand against the family will be in vain if you meet your demise at the hands of some ruddy Dark wizards-in -training who couldn't keep their mouths shut._

_Regards,_

_Uncle Alphard_

Sirius folded the letter and glanced at the accompanying paperwork. Indeed, the forms had the official Gringotts seal at the top right corner. He smiled to himself, though he couldn't help but be slightly irritated at Alphard's insistence that he 'be good.' He had just run away from home without any retaliation; he was sure he could take care of himself.

Sirius stood and stretched before making his way toward the diving board to join the others in the pool. He had never known his Uncle Alphard too well or spoken to him much, but he knew that, besides their indifference concerning pureblood mania, that they had at least one other thing in common: he was sure his uncle's spot on the Black family tree was as blacked out and charred as his own was.

* * *

Sirius breathed in deeply as he, James, Remus, and Peter entered Diagon Alley through the hidden entrance off the Leaky Cauldron. Although Clarice was accompanying them and the wizarding marketplace was emptier than usual, he was just happy to be out of the confines of the Potter home.

"Now, boys," James' mother began while extracting their school lists, "I have a lot to get done while we're here. I'll take care of your schoolbooks as long as you take care of everything else you need this year."

She then kissed her son on the cheek much to his dismay. "Please _behave_ yourselves," she implored while swinging her heavy purse back onto her shoulder and giving the other three boys a hard look. "Meet me back here at 3:00 sharp."

"Finally," James muttered after they bid her goodbye. "Off to Gambol and Japes then?"

A few minutes later, they were in the crowded joke shop, completely absorbed within their natural habitat of dungbombs, trick wands, and nose-biting teacups.

"Hey, Prongs, look!" yelled Peter from a corner. The other three turned around to find him at a display covered in pink and purple silks and an overall frilliness that made Sirius want to vomit.

"They have a new line of love potions," Peter continued when they all made their way over. "Maybe you could slip one into Lily's coffee one morning and finally have a chance with her."

"Piss off!" James said but couldn't hide his own laughter. "Besides, I would never use it on Lily; ours is a natural attraction."

"That's taken the past three years to develop?" Remus asked skeptically with a smirk.

James ignored him but grabbed a couple of bottles all the same. "It'll make for some classic pranks, I bet."

"Can we move onto something more interesting?" groaned Sirius. "We didn't stay cooped up in James' house for a week just to finally get to Diagon Alley for some bloody love potion."

"Aw, don't get upset, Padfoot, just because you have a girlfriend that you don't want."

Sirius acted as if he didn't hear James and made his way to a table of wet-start fireworks, but something outside the large display window caught his eye. A familiar blonde, brunette, and redhead were heading up the main road towards Florean's ice cream shop, each clutching many packages.

"Fancy trying out that potion?" Sirius asked the other three as he jerked his head towards the window.

A broad grin spread across James' face, and Sirius knew he didn't need a reason to go after his longtime obsession.

Minutes later the four boys were walking up towards the ice cream shop where the three girls were sitting at a table outside enjoying sundaes. Sirius thought they were mighty foolish, sitting out in the open without an of-age witch or wizard in these times. Lily might not have known better, but Keira and Jane certainly should have. Apparently, James was thinking the same.

"Hey, Evans!" James greeted as they reached their table. "Need a strapping escort for the rest of your visit?"

"Oh yes!" she said, looking up at the boys with a bright smile. "If you see that handsome Elias Smith anywhere, let him know we're looking for him." She looked satisfied as James' grin disappeared into a frown. "Get lost, Potter."

"Tut, tut," James said, not missing a beat, "not very becoming of a school Prefect."

"And when have you ever had consideration for a Prefect's behavior?" she asked, turning away from him. "Hey, Remus."

Remus started at the abrupt greeting. "Hello Lily, Keira, Jane," he said looking at the other girls in turn.

Everyone else exchanged civil greetings well. It took much control for Sirius to keep in his snide remark as Jane smiled invitingly at him; he would always regret ever getting involved with her.

"So what are you four up to?" Keira asked them. "No doubt already planning hell for the upcoming school…" She trailed off as her gaze shifted behind them and her eyes widened.

Sirius quickly turned around and felt his stomach drop. Walking straight for them was his bother, Regulus, Antonin Dolohov, and Michael Avery, all three wearing heavy black robes.

"Pretty brave of you to show your face in public," Regulus called as they approached. "Mother was sure you'd be hiding at the Potters' until the first."

Sirius glowered at his little brother, tightened his grip on his wand, and saw out the corner of his eye James, Remus, and Peter do the same, though he knew Regulus or the other two wouldn't dare make the first move. Arrogant Dark wizard wannabes they may be, but they were still underage.

Regulus sneered. "Don't play like you're going to do anything, not in Diagon Alley." He sounded like a child.

"Though with your present company, _I_ definitely feel tempted," Dolohov said in a low voice, looking at the three girls in particular. "Mudbloods and half-bloods alike. Despicable."

"You watch your damn mouth!" James shouted as he whipped out his wand and made a threatening move toward Dolohov.

"Nice day out, isn't it boys?" called a new voice to their left.

Sirius looked to his left and saw two tall men walking toward them, immediately recognizing them as Aurors who worked with James' father. They stopped in front of them, taking in the seven boys with wands trained on each other.

"Just a little reminder, which I'm sure you don't need," began the taller of the two, "but the school year doesn't start for another three days. I suggest you put those wands away."

The boys reluctantly stowed their wands, still keeping their heated gazes on each other. When the two Aurors were satisfied, they walked away.

"You got lucky this time," Dolohov growled, all his attention on Sirius, "but you wait until the school year starts. We'll teach you what happens to filthy blood-traitors that run away from home." And with that, they turned and stalked off.

Sirius heard the three girls behind them gasp.

"You…you ran away from home?"

Sirius turned around and saw Lily's look of concern, mirrored by Keira and Jane as well, and the anger in his chest slightly diminished.

"They can't go around threatening you like that," Lily continued. "You should tell someone."

Sirius shook his head and turned away. "See you girls on the first," he called over his shoulder as he walked away from the ice cream shop, followed by James, Remus, and Peter.

"But they—"

"Drop it, Evans," James said sternly. Sirius had never before heard him take a tone like that with Lily.

"What a turn of events, eh?" James asked darkly as he caught up with the rest of them. "One fun thing to look forward to later, though."

"What's that?" asked Peter, leading them into Quality Quidditch Supplies.

James grinned. "The Head Auror's son and his friends on the verge of a duel in Diagon Alley? My father is going to kill us when we get home."


	4. Keeping It Moving

"Oh, Isabella, if only your mother were here to see you off to her alma mater, she would be so proud," Derrick sighed while pulling his daughter into another death-grip hug.

"Dad…you're hurting me," Isabella said through gritted teeth.

"Sorry, sorry dear," he apologized as he pulled away from her. "I just never thought I would have to do this alone," Isabella heard him whisper more to himself than to her, and her eyes began to fill with tears. She had never left for a year at school without a kiss and hug from her mom.

It was September 1 on Platform 9 ¾ in Kings Cross station—the craziest, busiest, and longest day of Isabella's life, and it was only 10:45 in the morning. She had been so eager and apprehensive about starting at Hogwarts that falling asleep the night before was nearly impossible. When she finally did, she overslept, and her father was so busy working in his study that he had lost track of time.

The past hour was filled with frantic last minute packing, a hurried breakfast, and a rushed drive to the station in a Ministry car. Isabella was already physically and mentally drained, and the madness of the platform was not helping. It only increased when the engine whistle blew its last warning note, and students all around her and her father began rushing onto the train.

"Well, I guess this is it," Derrick lamented, pulling Isabella into one last hug. After a full minute, he finally released her, and she brushed back the tears that were now pouring freely down his cheeks.

"Don't worry, Dad, I'm just an owl away." She then kissed him on the cheek and disappeared among the last stragglers hastening to get on the train.

Isabella found herself completely overwhelmed once on the car. She knew no one on it, and it was full of the yelling and shouting of students going in every which direction and the incessant hooting of owls, croaking of toads, and mewing of cats. Sighing heavily, she pushed her way towards a baggage compartment, dragging her trunk and owl cage, in which her new tawny owl, Amelia, had joined the relentless bird-calling.

"Quiet, Amelia!" Isabella said as she tried to hoist her trunk and the cage onto a luggage rack; her efforts were constantly interrupted by the relentless shoving and pushing from small students who she assumed were first years that were nervously running up and down corridors.

Once her belongings were finally secured, she took in a deep breath and started to force her way down the aisle; she wished she could trade her summer journey on the Hogwarts Express for the one today. It was only two weeks ago, but it seemed a world away. That day, the sun was shining brightly and the air was crisp; today, the sun shone bleakly through light rain, and dark clouds loomed ominously over the northern horizon. It wasn't until she reached the end of the train that she found an empty compartment, and she seized it immediately, escaping the intrigued stares she was receiving from older students.

"Finally," she sighed as she plopped down on the squashy seats. She threw her legs up across the aisle onto the opposite seat, sliding down so that she was almost in a lying position. She closed her eyes and let her mind and body relax. Eventually, her breathing and heart rate slowed, and she felt herself drifting off to sleep…

"Isabella? Isabella!"

Her eyes shot open and her body jerked at the sound of her name, causing her to fall flat on her butt. Almost forgetting where she was, she looked up to her left at the sound of the compartment door opening. A familiar brunette was entering followed by an unknown girl with bone straight blonde hair.

"Isabella! I thought that was you!" Keira exclaimed. She then looked at Isabella with an amused expression. "What are you doing down there?"

"Yeah, it's not such a flattering position," the blonde added wryly.

Isabella looked down and frowned. Her uniform skirt had ridden up and an unladylike amount of her thighs was exposed. A slight blush spread across her dark cheeks as she quickly pulled it down.

"Oh, you just startled me, that's all," she said sheepishly.

"Sorry, looks like I'm your jinx," Keira laughed as she walked over and helped Isabella up; the blonde took a seat on the opposite side of the compartment. "Jane, this is Isabella, the girl Lily and I met while in Diagon Alley. Isabella, this is Jane Carroll."

Isabella reached across the aisle and extended her hand. "I'm Isabella Williams; it's nice to meet you."

"You as well," Jane replied with a tight smile and stiff handshake. Isabella frowned slightly and sat back.

Keira gave Jane a hard look but turned back to Isabella. "Lily is a Prefect, so she had to attend a meeting, but she should be here soon." Her eyes then dropped from Isabella's face to her neck, and she gasped. "You're in Gryffindor!"

Isabella looked down at her burgundy and gold tie. "Oh, yeah. I was sorted a couple weeks ago when my father met with Professor Dumbledore." It was then she noticed that she was fully dressed in her uniform, and they were not; she felt foolish.

"So are we! And Lily too," Keira said with a bright smile. "You must be taking Harietta's free bed. You'll be sharing a dormitory with us."

Isabella returned Keira's smile, happy at the fact that she would not be completely alone on her first day. Jane, however, looked annoyed.

"What happened to Harietta?" Isabella then asked tentatively, hoping she wasn't replacing a close friend.

"Oh…well the village where her family lived was attacked by supporters of a Dark wizard," Keira began quietly. "Her whole family—mother, father, and two younger brothers—all killed, and the day before Christmas holiday at that. It was terrible."

She took a deep, shuddering breath and continued. "Her grandparents came to pick her up along with her younger sister, and when school resumed for the second term, they didn't return. We soon learned they all fled the country, and her spot in the dormitory has been empty ever since."

"My goodness," Isabella whispered with wide eyes, knowing very well who that Dark wizard was. "You mean Voldemort supporters?" she asked.

Keira gasped and Jane glared at her.

"What?" she asked innocently.

"You know about him?" Keira asked, looking fearful. "Most wizards and witches don't know who he is, much less people from outside of Britain, and no one but his supporters use his name."

"Sorry," Isabella apologized, feeling imprudent once again. "It's just that my father used his name so openly with me that I didn't know it was taboo here. He's the reason we moved here, actually."

At Keira and Jane's questioning looks, she worried that they thought she and Derrick as supporters of Voldemort, and hastily added, "My father is in charge of a new program at the Ministry—"

"You're father isn't Derrick Williams, is he?" Keira interrupted.

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"My older brother is training to be an Auror, and Derrick is all he talks about," Keira replied. "If I didn't know better, I'd say he was in love, but you have to know that your father's moving here was made a very big deal, even if most people don't know why he was invited in the first place. When people had learned what he accomplished in America, they figured it would only strengthen our Ministry. And if my brother's enthusiasm is any indication, he seems to be off to a great start."

Isabella was taken aback, simply stunned that her father was already highly regarded here. Even Jane's smug face that she had been wearing since entering the compartment looked mildly impressed.

"Well, I can assure you he's been working as hard as he can," she finally said a little bitterly, remembering that their vacation to Paris the weekend before being cancelled due to some important new leads coming into the office, but something confused her. "If Vol—this Dark wizard is still working undercover, how do you two know about him?"

Keira and Jane shared a loaded look.

"Jane and I are both purebloods," Keira said slowly, "and we both have some relatives who…agree with his manifesto."

"Meaning…?" Isabella asked, still puzzled.

Suddenly, the compartment door jerked open, causing them all to jump. Lily entered the compartment looking extremely harassed.

"Lily!" Keira yelled while jumping up and hugging the redhead. "So good to see you!"

"What are you on about?" Lily asked, trying to push Keira off. "I left you just twenty minutes ago."

"I know, but I missed you so…Oh! Look who's here!" Keira exclaimed as she moved back to her seat.

"Isabella! I was hoping we'd find you," Lily greeted as she took the seat opposite Isabella and next to Jane. "I was just looking over the list of students and saw that you had been sorted into Gryffindor and would be our new roommate."

"Yeah, the only one missing is Mary, and you'll probably meet her once tonight and never see her again since she's always gone snogging her boyfriend stupid…among other things," Keira added dismissively.

"That is if they're still together," Jane chimed in.

"They are," Lily said, and the look of annoyance returned. "I just caught them hiding behind a high stack of trunks. They really have no shame."

"I wouldn't have any shame either if I were able to kiss Charlie Davies anytime I wanted," Jane said matter-of-factly. "How she snagged him I'll never understand."

Keira snorted. "Well, after the many times you and Sirius were caught last year, I was sure your shame had already been long gone." Lily tried to hide her laughter behind her hand, but Jane didn't look too amused.

"Ha-ha," she mocked while her cobalt eyes glared at Keira. "Doesn't matter anyways, Sirius is busy losing his shame with someone else now."

"Ooh, gossip!" Keira said as a mischievous grin played across her lips. "Do we know who his new girlfriend is?"

"Pretty sure he is still with that insufferable what's-her-name," Jane said.

"Daphne!" Keira offered brightly.

"Right," Jane continued dully with a shrug. "I am surprised she's not gone yet."

Isabella noticed Keira share a side-glance with Lily.

"But you know what I did hear?" Jane baited while leaning in closer, her sullen mood changing to excitement, "apparently Loretta Bloom, you know that plain looking fifth year from Hufflepuff, had a massive makeover this past summer and was seen cuddling up with Charlie in Diagon Alley towards the end of holiday, just after we were there!"

"No! Not Mary's Charlie?" gasped Lily, again covering her mouth with her hand.

"The very one," Jane confirmed, fervently nodding.

Keira didn't look so surprised. "You know, I heard he's cheated on her many times since a few months after they started dating. The boy is incredibly handsome, and he can really charm any girl; most of them fall for it."

"I thought those were just rumors," Lily said disbelievingly.

"Nope," Keira said sadly as she shook her head. "In fact, while looking for you guys earlier on the platform, I ran into Grace Harrington, and she told me…"

Isabella began to feel left out as the girls continued to gossip about people she did not know. However, she felt incredibly comfortable with them and figured that her first day could be going a lot worse.

Her stomach growled as she turned to watch the passing landscape, and she wondered how much time had passed since the ride began. They sky had darkened considerably since they left, and a more persistent rain was now falling. She remembered reading in _Hogwarts, a_ _History_ that a snack trolley made its way down the corridor, but she couldn't recall at exactly what time that happened. When she heard the compartment door open for a third time, she turned in hopes of soon enjoying lunch. Instead, four boys were making their way in. Isabella recognized two of them.

"Good day, ladies!" greeted James. "Sorry for interrupting your gossip hour, but you can stop talking about us now that we're here." The girls tried to suppress their smiles and rolled their eyes, save for Lily, who remained unfazed.

"I'm sorry, Potter," she said coldly, "but I don't remember inviting you into our conversation, or our compartment for that matter."

"But, Evans, I didn't think that I'd have to be," the boy went on eagerly; her stern glare seemed to go unseen by him. "I was sure you'd want to see me; we didn't get the chance to properly catch up last time."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Well, you thought wrong because, honestly, I don't care." She looked past him and at the other three. "Hello Remus, Sirius, Peter," she greeted civilly. They nodded back and the other two girls greeted them as well.

"Hey, Isabella," James said. "You alright?'

She started slightly at being singled out. "Hi, James. I'm great. How are you, your mother and father?"

"The Potter clan is as happy as can be considering there is a Dark wizard out there wanting to kill us all," he said jovially.

He then turned to the other three boys. "These are my three best friends, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, and Sirius Black, who was too big a prat to introduce himself the last time you saw him."

Sirius smiled grandly and gave a flamboyant bow, and Isabella could not help but grin at his absurdity.

"Nice meeting you," she said sincerely.

"So like I told you before, I am going to help you along during your first days at Hogwarts," James said haughtily, "so here's my first piece of advice: these three you are sitting with will cause you nothing but trouble, and the four of us pretty much run the place so make sure to get on our good side."

The boys behind him snorted; Keira and Jane giggled; Lily continued to glower.

Isabella nodded hesitantly with a small smile, unsure of what to say, and an awkward silence followed.

"Er, let's go, you guys," James suggested, looking uneasy at Lily's steady glare. "See you all at the feast."

"Finally!" Lily exclaimed, throwing her arms into the air. "Potter is _so_ annoying. He just thinks he can waltz into others' private compart—"

"Yes, yes we know, Lily, he's terrible," Jane droned while examining her nails. "Surprised he didn't ask you out, though."

"But he did!" Lily cried with exaggerated fervor. "He already asked me after I caught Mary but before I reached you girls."

"James is obsessed with Lily," Keira turned and explained to Isabella. "She won't give him a chance though."

"He seems nice enough," Isabella said, thinking back to when she first met him, though she had to admit that he did come off a bit proud. She suddenly remembered something and looked at Lily. "Wait, so you two never dated?"

Lily looked at Isabella as if she had sprouted two heads. "Do I look mental?"

Isabella shrugged. "Just wondering," she murmured, feeling foolish again. "What's so bad about him?"

"He's a randy, arrogant bastard," Jane answered bluntly, before Lily could open her mouth. "He and Sirius—the other one with black hair—are notorious for their dating habits…let's just say they have quite a few notches on their bedposts," Jane added at Isabella's questioning look.

Keira rolled her eyes. "Those are just highly exaggerated rumors," she said. She lightly cleared her throat and continued. "Besides, you didn't seem to have a problem with Sirius' habits when you were, uh, _dating_. But I guess since he's not womanizing _you_ now, he just a shameless pig."

Lily's eyes widened in alarm while Keira looked expectantly at Jane.

Jane, however, didn't say anything but huffed in exasperation as she glowered at both Keira and Lily. She left a particularly nasty glare for Isabella before storming out of the compartment.

"What was that about?" Isabella asked Keira, as Lily was shaking with giggles.

"Just Jane being her typical, hypocritical self," Keira replied. "Her _dating_ habits are just as bad as she claims theirs are, if not worse."

Lily finally began to calm down. "But don't worry about her; one thing you'll learn living with Jane is that she is awfully dramatic and overreacts to everything."

"And she'll be back later, after she's calmed down, and act like nothing happened," Keira added while stretching. She then turned to Isabella with an obnoxious grin. "But more importantly, which one of those lovely boys do you want us to hook you up with?"

Isabella laughed out loud at Keira's brazenness; Lily was shaking her head but smiling all the same.

Keira only shrugged. "Not like you weren't thinking the same thing."

However, they never found out what Isabella was thinking, for the sliding of the compartment door for a fourth time saved her.

"Anything from the trolley, dears?" the attendant asked.

_Finally_, Isabella thought, and she proceeded to buy one of everything.

* * *

A few hours later, Isabella was shivering as she followed the other girls into the Great Hall. They had just arrived at school and it was pouring; their robes were completely soaked through before they had even reached the carriages that took them to Hogwarts. And just as Keira had expected, Jane had joined their carriage just before it took off, asking them about the rest of their train rides and complaining about the rain.

"And this is our table," Lily said as they reached the table at the far end of the hall and sat down. The single, round table where she, her father, and Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore had dined just weeks before had been replaced with four long tables and a high table at the head of the Hall.

"The Sorting won't be so bad as long as Dumbledore's speech afterward doesn't take forever; I'm too famished and might pass out before the end," a voice said behind Isabella. She turned from examining the professors she had not yet met and saw the four boys from earlier joining their company, the one she knew as Remus sitting down to her left.

"But I thought as a Prefect, you had to be the example of the ideal student which includes giving your undivided attention to our elders," James said sitting down next to Remus and across from Lily.

Remus shrugged. "I didn't ask to be a Prefect."

"Doesn't matter, you still have to retain your responsibilities," Lily said reprovingly.

"Uh, Evans, I don't believe that you were asked to join our conversation," James said curtly, though with a grin.

Lily's resolve didn't soften one bit. "Then next time you know not to sit near us."

"Oh, but how could I stray, my Lily flower?" James asked, clutching at his heart. "Your grace and beauty draw me to you like a moth to a flame."

Her eyes narrowed, but he only sighed while a smirk began to tug at his mouth.

"Don't worry," Remus said quietly leaning towards Isabella, "their bantering is an everyday occurrence. The day it ends is when you should be concerned."

"Good to know," Isabella replied with a small laugh as the Hall doors closed, and the first years walked towards the staff table led by Professor McGonagall. Everyone around her sighed deeply as the professor unrolled a parchment and began reading names; the young students looked around apprehensively as they waited to be called.

The Sorting carried on, and Isabella took the opportunity to gaze about the Great Hall. She was impressed with the bewitched ceiling, which was storming, and the hundreds of candles floating in the air above them; both had gone unnoticed during her first visit.

Also new were the banners hanging across the ceiling; there were four banners bearing the colors of each house at the head of their respective tables, but all of the rest were green and silver, signifying that Slytherin had won the House Cup the year before.

"Welcome to another year at Hogwarts!" Dumbledore's voice boomed and Isabella looked up quickly and saw that all the first years had been sorted and the Headmaster had taken his place at the podium and was looking about the hall.

"To our returning students, I hope you find Hogwarts as comfortable as you left it, and I hope my school lives up to the expectations of our new students, both young…and old." His eyes fell upon Isabella, and she squirmed in her seat. "As always a great year begins with a great feast, so tuck in."

Food and drink instantly appeared on the tables, and the silence that Dumbledore's presence commanded gave way to the clatter of silverware on dishes and excited voices.

About an hour later, the Great Hall began to empty as students made their way to their respective dormitories. Remus and Lily went ahead of the group to help lead the first years while Isabella stayed with Keira and Jane, and the three other boys hung back.

"Probably planning their first prank," Keira guessed as they pushed their way through the packed doorway. "Just know that whenever you see them huddled together like that and avoiding other students, it would be good to avoid their company for the next day or so, or you'll become an innocent victim of an unfortunate incident."

Isabella raised her eyebrows. "Again, good to know. What exactly—"

But she was cut off as a group of four or five students relentlessly knocked into her as they passed. She lost her footing and almost hit the floor before Keira quickly grabbed her arm and pulled her back up.

"Watch where you're going, blood-traitor," the tallest of the group turned around and spat in a low voice. He had sandy blonde hair and icy blue eyes, and the others around burst into raucous laughter as they turned down the corridor that led to the dungeons.

"'Blood-traitor,' what in the…" Isabella wondered aloud as she regained her balance and rubbed her right shoulder.

"Don't worry about them; it's typical Slytherin behavior," Keira tried to assure her as they continued their journey. "But let me guess, you're a pureblood?"

Isabella nodded. "But what does that have to do with anything?"

"It's what I was trying to explain before," Keira began. "Slytherin has the highest amount of pureblood students, and you'll find that most of them would rather have the whole magical community be that way."

"Yeah, every wizard or witch ever involved in the Dark Arts was a Slytherin, including Voldemort," Jane added in a low voice. "And with your father being who he is makes you a prime target."

"Great," Isabella said dully, thinking back to the numerous conversations she had had with her father before after the move. She couldn't remember him ever talking about Voldemort and purebloods—her father had only referred to the Dark wizard's "master plans" as such. She grew slightly annoyed.

When they finally reached their common room, it was nearly empty. Lily was already in the dormitory arranging her things. "What took you guys so long?"

"Nothing, just a run-in with dear Dolohov," Keira said plopping down onto her bed.

Lily's face pulled into a frown. "Everything okay?"

"Fine," she replied, waving her hand dismissively.

Isabella mentally noted to mention Dolohov in her first letter to her father and began rummaging through her trunk for her pajamas when the door suddenly burst open. She turned to see a tall girl with long, curly brown hair entering the room.

"Hey girls!" she said cheerily without looking at any of them and heading straight to the bathroom. "How were your holidays?"

"Fine."

"Good."

"Terrible. Say, Mary!" Keira yelled. "We have a new roommate—Isabella Williams."

Mary reappeared in the doorway a minute later. "Oh?" She walked back out and toward Isabella, outstretching her hand. "Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Mary Macdonald." Isabella noticed she had a very pretty smile.

"You too," Isabella said with a grin.

Mary turned and went to her trunk. "So I guess Harietta's really not coming back, huh? Such a shame; I hope everything's okay with her." She then stood abruptly, slammed her trunk, and made her way toward the door with a few garments in hand. "Well, ladies, it was good chatting. I'll see you all later."

"You know, one day you and Charlie are going to get caught," Jane called out.

"And I intend to enjoy every minute until that happens," Mary said with a smirk and closed the door behind her.

"Or until you catch him with someone else," Jane muttered under her breath as she made her way to the bathroom.

Lily rolled her eyes and turned to Isabella. "So that was Mary. Don't worry if you don't see her for another week."

Another ten minutes passed before the girls decided to head to bed. Isabella closed her curtains, got under the warm covers, and stared up at the darkness above her. Although she was the most tired she had ever been, she let out a sigh of relief at how well the day had gone. She wasn't sure if it counted as her first official day at Hogwarts, but as Dumbledore has promised, it was definitely a memorable one.

* * *

Moonlight peered behind thinning storm clouds and glistened upon the wet grass below the window of the still dormitory. It had finally stopped raining, and the quiet room was disturbed only by light snores as everyone slept, save for the occupant of the last bed closest to the window.

Sirius roughly drew back the curtains of his bed with a frustrated sigh. He had been staring up at his canopy for the past four hours, yet sleep didn't seem likely to come anytime soon. He stood up and walked to the window, opening it to let a bit of wind blow in and calm his nerves.

Although he hadn't mentioned it to James or the others yet, the situation that occurred in Diagon Alley a couple of days ago was bothering him more than he had originally let on.

Sirius could openly laugh at the threat from his brother; Regulus was only thirteen-years-old. But the other two, Dolohov and Avery, gave him a lot to worry over. They were large, tall, brooding, and probably already so deep into the Dark Arts that there was no hope for them—the type of people Sirius and his friends would normally not seek out a fight with. They were reckless pranksters, yes, but not stupid.

He sighed heavily and walked back to his bed as his thoughts went back to Regulus—his little brother, someone he had actually been close to at one point in time. Although Regulus had listened and sympathized with Sirius behind closed doors at home, he would fervently agree with his parents and other family during heated discussions about blood purity within the Wizarding world.

Sirius had hoped to try to reach Regulus and help him rise above the beliefs of his family, but their last encounter had shown him he had no possibility of ever making an impact. He was officially marked as a blood-traitor, and despite being surrounded by his best friends in the castle he called home, Sirius had never felt so alone…or so afraid of what the upcoming year had in store.

"Sirius," Peter called, "you'd better get up or you're going to be late for breakfast." There was no reply. "Sirius!" he then yelled.

Suppressing the urge to snap his friend's neck in half, Sirius reluctantly sat up and opened his curtains. He wasn't sure when he had fallen asleep, but it definitely had not been enough, and he gave Peter the deadliest glare he could muster at such an early hour.

"S-sorry," Peter stammered, cowering under his friends stare, "but, you know, first day and everything…"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Sirius muttered as he changed into his school clothes. Feeling everyone's eyes on him, he looked up. "What?" he demanded.

"You look terrible," Remus answered.

"You're one to talk," he spat back.

Remus rolled his eyes and continued organizing his schoolbag. However, James persisted.

"Is everything okay?" he asked with mild concern.

"Fine, fine," Sirius replied, waving his hand. "Just a night of bad sleep."

"Well, good," James said, "because things are about to be not okay." At Sirius' annoyed look, he continued with a grin. "Daphne is downstairs, and she is not happy."

Sirius groaned. At the beginning of summer, he had made the effort to write and visit Daphne when her parents were away, but had not replied to her letters or seen her once since he left his parents' house. And somehow, he had managed to completely avoid her yesterday on the train and at the feast.

After changing and maturing more in the past two weeks than ever before in his life, Sirius was unsure of what he wanted or needed in a girlfriend, or if he even needed one at all, but he was sure that an insecure, clingy fifth year was not it.

"Why don't you just break up with her?" Remus asked for what seemed the hundredth time as they began to make their way out the room. Sirius didn't reply; he was still cursing to himself, as he had been since James spoke her name.

"It isn't obvious?" James asked, clapping Sirius on the back. "Our little Padfoot is growing up. No longer does he want to enjoy the fruits of being a teenage boy and indulge in purely physical relationships. He wants to settle down, commit to his intellectual equal and all."

"So, again, why is he still with Daphne?" Remus asked. Sirius couldn't help but laugh.

"What's got you in such a good mood this morning?"

Sirius looked up as they reached the end of the stairs and met Daphne's green eyes. From what James had said earlier, he thought she would be furious, but she just stood there with a nervous smile, and he wondered why he had expected anything different.

"The thought of seeing you, of course," he said without missing a beat. As the other three boys made a show of gagging as they continued to walk past, he flashed his trademark grin and winked—the Sirius charm had officially turned on.

"Really?" she asked as her smile widened. When he nodded, she added, "Because I was getting worried; I haven't heard from you for a while. I thought you had forgotten all about me."

Sirius nearly lost it at her simper, but he quickly composed himself. "And I'm sorry about that, love, but I've just been busy. I was planning to make our first day back together special."

"Well, you've got me intrigued," she said in a sultry whisper.

He winked again, grabbed her hand, and led her towards the portrait hole, mentally kicking himself all the while. He didn't exactly understand how this timid, seemingly innocent girl shred all traces of that personality behind closed doors, but he enjoyed it. He also knew that he needed to suck it up and end this travesty of a relationship, but he figured one last night couldn't hurt.

"I see they've let the trash return for another year," Daphne muttered under her breath.

Sirius pulled his eyes away from her chest to see her glaring at Jane who was just reaching the exit. The latter ignored Daphne and focused her attention on Sirius.

"Good morning," she greeted airily. She then turned and left without waiting for a reply that wouldn't come, closely followed by Lily, Keira, and Isabella who all greeted him as well. The small smile from Isabella slightly stunned him. He racked his brain to make a witty remark, but before he could respond, she was already gone.

"Ugh!" Daphne let out angrily. "I can't stand her! She just hates the thought of us together." She reached up to kiss Sirius on the lips. "Serves her right though; she doesn't deserve someone like you, and she knows it."

"Yeah…yeah, don't worry about her," Sirius said, still somewhat distracted. "Let's go get some breakfast; we're already late."

They finally reached the Great Hall and Daphne's friends were waving fanatically at her to sit with them. With a promise of seeing him tonight and a kiss on the cheek, she left to join her friends.

Sirius sat down just as Professor McGonagall began handing out their schedules. Looking over them, they all realized that O.W.L. scores and varying career paths now meant they would not have as many classes together.

While they all still shared N.E.W.T. level Defense Against the Dark Arts, Charms, and Herbology, Peter and Jane did not make it to N.E.W.T. Potions, Keira no longer had Transfiguration but had Astronomy instead and shared Ancient Runes with Remus, Peter and Lily had Care of Magical Creatures together; and Jane and James had decided to stick with Muggle Studies. Sirius couldn't help but smile when he learned he would be taking Arithmancy with Isabella.

"Arithmancy!" Jane exclaimed after she snatched Isabella's schedule from its owner's hands. "You are staying with Arithmancy?"

"Well, yeah?" Isabella answered tentatively.

"Sirius, you are sticking with it too?" James asked in disbelief. "How do either of you plan on having any fun this year? Arithmancy is the hardest N.E.W.T. level class behind Transfiguration."

Sirius remained silent, but Isabella shrugged as she spread marmalade over most of her breakfast. "I was asking myself the same question when McGonagall suggested it, but she doesn't seem like the kind of person too concerned with having fun."

Their laughs were drowned out by the entrance of the morning post owls.

* * *

"This is such a waste of time," Sirius groaned as he lazily levitated a pillow through the air. "Why are we even here?"

James shrugged while playing with his snitch. "Could be worse. At least we're doing nothing."

"Well, we could be doing nothing in more entertaining places."

Sirius let out a long, annoyed sigh. He and James were currently stuck in the Transfiguration classroom after somehow getting detention. Well actually, he knew exactly how they had received it but, of course, felt that their actions were completely justified.

While waiting for class to begin, the group of Slytherins smart enough to pass onto N.E.W.T. level walked in, and, in Sirius' opinion, looking for a fight. Dolohov, in particular, made a point to yell out 'blood-traitor' and 'Mudblood' in his and the girls' directions as many times as he could while talking to his friends. Of course, Sirius felt the need to defend himself and his friends, but unfortunately, so did James, Peter, and Remus, for as he sent a Jelly-Legs jinx Dolohov's way, the Slytherin also received a Furnunculus jinx, an Incarcerous jinx, and a Bat-Bogey hex from the rest of them.

Needless to say, Dolohov was a total mess by the time Professor McGonagall arrived, looking furious, though slightly resigned. She never showed favoritism to her own house, so no one was surprised when the four of them received detention and the Slytherins, who never attacked, were only scathingly reprimanded for their language. And to make matters worse, they were split into two groups, as McGonagall thought the four of them serving detention together would only cause more trouble.

So here they were, sitting in an empty classroom and beginning their second hour of doing nothing. McGonagall was currently overseeing the first official Prefect meeting and was too busy to assign them a demeaning task, a first ever for her.

The only interesting event of the night had been when the meeting attendees arrived, including Lily.

"Really, you guys, detention on the first day," Lily had said as she walked through toward McGonagall's study. "Going for a new record?"

"Only for defending your honor, dear Lily," James responded. Sirius had decided to stay out of it.

Lily stopped and turned to face him; her eyes darkened angrily. "And I thought I made it explicitly clear last June, Potter, that I don't need you defending me."

James had only continued to smile while she spun back around in a huff and quickly walked away towards McGonagall's study.

"You think Remus is upset about missing that meeting?" Sirius asked, an hour later when the meeting still had not ended.

James shrugged. "McGonagall usually doesn't supervise the meetings, it's the Head Boy and Girl right? Must be some major changes happening with all of the Dark activity that's been occurring lately. I've even noticed my father more worried than ever lately, though he won't tell me any details," he said grudgingly. "And they dragged Isabella and her father out here all the way from the States to help."

"And Dumbledore alluded to it last night in his speech," Sirius added, continuing James' thoughts. The Headmaster's speech after the food had disappeared included the usual warnings about the Forbidden Forest and illegal objects. At the end, he added that additional security would be set up around the grounds, a new 7:00 PM curfew for fifth years and younger would be strictly enforced, and that new rules and restrictions could be enacted at anytime whenever the staff felt they were appropriate. However, Dumbledore never gave any reason for all the new rules.

Though what worried Sirius more was that his parents had been referring to such changes in his last few days at home. His mother in particular had been unusually happy, informing him, though without any real details, that the increase in seemingly random disappearances since the end of year had not been a coincidence. He knew that they held the one called Voldemort in very high regard and knew that he was the mastermind behind the Dark activity, but the mysterious leader had not yet revealed himself to the magical community beyond purebloods. However, if Sirius' parents' recent enthusiasm had been an indication, he feared that Voldemort's debut would be sooner than later.

"What do you know about Isabella's situation?" Sirius asked abruptly, wanting to get his mind away from his parents and former home.

"Huh?" James said, slightly startled. "Oh…uh, some. Mum wouldn't tell me much about her and Derrick, but I was able to get it out of Dad after much prodding," he added with a smirk. "A 'personal tragedy involving her mother,' Dad said, 'that compelled Derrick to move here and help fight against whatever is out there.'"

At this, Sirius raised an eyebrow in question.

"She was…murdered," James said in a low voice, "her mother I mean, back in March while visiting family here. There was only a small story in the _Daily Prophet_ but some at the Ministry and others who had been 'watching the signs,' as Dad put it, knew it meant something more. It wasn't an accidental death as the _Prophet_ told it; it was murder, and a magical one at that using an Unforgivable."

Sirius was stunned—he couldn't remember hearing anything about it, which was odd, since such stories always made the front-page. "Who killed her?"

"Dad doesn't know exactly who, but they suspect it was a follower of that Dark wizard roaming about called Volmore…Voldymorn—"

"Voldemort," Sirius offered.

"Yeah. How did you know?"

"My parents were talking about him before I left," Sirius replied, seeing it all come together in his mind. "He is the one behind all of the Dark magic lately, according to them."

James nodded. "That is what my Dad said, but he wouldn't go more into it."

"But I don't understand it," Sirius said, remembering catching the end of Dolohov harassing Isabella as everyone exited the Great Hall last night. "Isabella is a pureblood, and that is what Voldemort is all about, 'purifying' the magical community. Why would he kill or order someone to kill another pureblood?"

"You know how I said her mother was visiting family? Well, she is originally from here, somewhere in Wales if I remember correctly, and after finishing Hogwarts and Healer studies at St. Mungo's, she left for the States to attend some advanced program. Dad said she is well known for her knowledge of medical potions and antidotes, and—I don't know—maybe he, Voldemort, needed or wanted her in his group," James said with uncertainty.

"And she denied him," Sirius guessed, knowing how it ended and fully understanding where Isabella's status as a 'blood-traitor' came from. Isabella had lived a world away, in a different country, on another continent, but Voldemort had still affected her life. She had still suffered a tragedy, and was now forced to live in the midst of it all. Her mother dead and her father now allied with the Ministry against the dangerous but unknown growing power responsible for her mother's death—Sirius couldn't imagine the daily unrest she dealt with, and he had thought he had it bad.

"Terrible, huh?" James said, startling Sirius out of his thoughts. They had been quiet for a long time. "And Dad thinks it's only going to get worse."

Sirius shook his head. "Lousy Ministry, why aren't they—"

He was cut off by the door to McGonagall's study bursting open. The Prefects walked out looking anxious but chatting animatedly. Sirius winked and grinned at a few of the girls, who giggled back. Lily ignored them both as she passed with Elias Smith, a Hufflepuff sixth year, with whom she was in deep conversation.

"What are you going to do about Evans?" Sirius asked when the classroom was empty, hoping to leave the depressing previous subject behind.

"Absolutely nothing," James answered shortly after a long pause, looking surly. "If something is meant to happen, then it will."

"Well…Prongs, that seems like a mature, respectable plan," Sirius eventually said, really unsure of what to say. He had never heard James sound so dejectedly resigned when it came to Lily.

James suddenly grinned. "But I plan on having as much fun as possible until that happens."

They both turned at the sound of the study door opening again, and McGonagall emerged, looking tired and stressed. When she saw James and Sirius, she slightly jumped.

"Oh! I had forgotten about you two," she said, sounding bothered. "Well, you are free to go. Head straight to Gryffindor Tower, and if I hear about anymore trouble making before the end of the week, you are going straight to the Headmaster."

"Yes, Professor," they replied in glum unison, hoping they looked somewhat remorseful.

Minutes later, they were on their way back to the common room when Sirius picked up on where they had left off.

"Anyone look good to you so far?" he asked as Nearly Headless Nick passed them, tipping his hat.

"Delilah Peterson," James replied confidently at once.

A frown pulled at Sirius' lips. "That dumpy Ravenclaw?"

"You obviously haven't seen her since term began," James said a little defensively. "Get a look at her tomorrow morning, Padfoot, and you will be wishing you weren't tied down."

Sirius glared at James, who only laughed.

"Sorry to bring up such a sore subject," James apologized with flagrant sarcasm. "But you know what you need to do."

Sirius knew James was right and was already decided on ending his relationship, but he cursed to himself when he suddenly remembered his promise this morning.

Despite the late hour, he was sure Daphne would be waiting for him when they returned, expecting some 'special night' that was never planned.


	5. Long Way to Go

"Welcome to your first year of N.E.W.T. Potions!" boomed Professor Slughorn as he strode to the front of the classroom. He then turned and let his eyes roam over the small group of students appreciatively.

"Your decision to continue with Potions shows great determination and daring, but I will still warn you: the potions you will be concocting over the next two years will be extremely demanding, sometimes dangerous, and should be approached with caution. As such, I will not tolerate any tomfoolery or…"

James sighed and settled deeper into his seat as Slughorn continued with his endless speech. It was along the same lines as the speech they had received from Professor McGonagall in Transfiguration on the first day of classes, earlier this morning from Professor Greene in Herbology, and what, James assumed, they would be hearing from the rest of their professors as the first week progressed. James figured that if students hadn't taken school seriously up to this point already, twenty-minute long, ominous, and repetitive speeches were not going to change their habits now; besides, the whole thing was becoming rather trite.

He was usually never this bored in class, especially the first one of the year, but his partners in crime were otherwise occupied. Remus was ardently paying attention and taking notes, as always, and was never the one to initiate their usual goofing off. Peter, who he could always depend on to start some mischief, didn't pass his O.W.L., the lousy git. However, most of them didn't expect him to do so anyways.

And then there was Sirius. James had definitely noticed that his best friend was acting differently, but that was to be expected when you curse your own family and run away from home. Sirius had been very open with him upon arrival at his home, but since then, he began slowly closing himself up over the past two weeks to the point that now he just sat brooding, speaking little to nothing at all once the four of them were alone.

James was worried, but he attributed the renewal of Sirius' sullen mood to the confrontation with Regulus and being back at school, which meant daily encounters with the people who hated him most. When James asked Remus about the whole thing during one their breaks earlier today, Remus claimed that he was not worried at all and was sure Sirius would eventually pull himself out of his surly mood once they got back into the swing of things. And since Remus had the most common sense out of all of them, James agreed, and put it in the back of his mind, though intending to keep an eye out.

Everyone suddenly started moving around him with hasty eagerness. James figured that Slughorn must have just finished his speech—describing the various potions bubbling in the cauldrons around them before 'forgetting' to mention the pot of Felix Felicis and offering a small bottle of it to whoever made the best attempt at the day's work, as he did every year. The assigned potion changed from year to year, but the setup was always the same.

James would have been just as enthusiastic as everyone else, but he knew he had no chance at winning it. Not that he wasn't any good at Potions, it's just that Lily and, as much as he hated to admit it, Snape were better than him and everyone else for that matter. There was no reason to overexert yourself if you were competing against either one of them, or even worse, together as a team.

James was watching them now, Lily and Snape, as he started a fire beneath his cauldron, looking for any sign of camaraderie between them. Lily was stationed at the right front table with Isabella and Keira, and Snape had been surreptitiously trying to catch her eye from the moment class started from his table across from hers. James was happy to see that Lily was just as resolutely avoiding Snape's gaze, but he feared that Lily would eventually forgive Snape if the latter begged enough. And as much as James admired Lily, he wouldn't respect her anymore if she did.

However, James knew, deep down, that Lily never would. A year ago, maybe, when she was more naïve, but not now. Something had changed in Lily over the summer—she had toughened, become more cynical of the world around her. There was a hardened resolve about her now. He had first noticed it during their encounter in Diagon Alley a couple of weeks ago, last night before her Prefect meeting, and again when he asked her out earlier this week on the train, after their first Transfiguration lesson, and yesterday morning after breakfast. All date proposals were rejected—nothing new—but this time accompanied with cruel teasing that surprised everyone.

This new Lily was the reason he had decided to back off.

When Lily and Snape's friendship ended that day after their Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L., James was utterly shocked and slightly offended that Lily had not run straight into his waiting arMiss Wasn't the only thing keeping them apart was Snape and his grossly exaggerated and inaccurate opinions of James with which he had most certainly brainwashed Lily?

It just didn't make sense to James why Lily was not his girlfriend at this very moment, and when he expressed his confusion and frustration to his friends before term started, he got very different reactions. Peter agreed fervently, Sirius sneered indifferently, but Remus had only sighed and shook his head resignedly.

James wasn't sure what Remus' response meant, but he didn't care now. Besides, forgetting about Lily and concentrating on Delilah required less focus than whatever moral lesson Remus was intending on lecturing him about.

Speaking of Delilah, James was staring brazenly at _her_ now, and he wondered how she had escaped his radar the past couple of years. Sirius had been wrong for calling her dumpy—true, she had been no Daphne Owens or, though he would never admit it in front of Sirius, Narcissa Black from a few years ago, but she had become more distinctive over the last year—a bit taller, a little shapelier, and simply brighter than the group of girls she was usually with.

Of course, the entire Ravenclaw sixth year had made it into N.E.W.T. Potions, and the girls had set up shop in the very back left corner of the classroom. A few of them had noticed James staring at their oblivious friend and were giggling and nudging her insistently. Delilah finally acknowledged them with a stern look of irritation for being interrupted—true to Ravenclaw form—and followed the path of their pointing fingers.

James grinned when he met her hazel gaze. Her eyes widened in surprise as a blush rose in her cheeks. She smiled shyly for only a moment before bending back over her cauldron and letting her hair fall and hide her face.

_Mission accomplished_, James thought as he chuckled to himself. He and Sirius had learned very early on in their third year that a cheeky grin and a wink could hook any girl, save for a few, but James refused to think about the one in particular that mattered to him.

"Oi! James, watch it!" Sirius barked while swatting his arm away. James looked around to his friend who was pointing down to his cauldron.

"Fuck," James muttered under his breath as he watched his potion begin to bubble over and emit acrid plumes of dark smoke. James glanced around the room at the other cauldrons, most of which contained shimmering silver liquid. He looked down at his again, which had congealed into a thick paste with the color of charcoal. He had never gone so wrong in Potions.

"Something has definitely got you distracted," Sirius said through laughter as James fruitlessly tried to stir the concoction, ignoring him. "Let me guess, does it have something to do with a certain fetching blond Ravenclaw?"

James turned toward Sirius with a smirk. "Not so dumpy now, is she?" James asked mockingly, his worthless potion now forgotten. "Maybe I was a little distracted, but the groundwork has been laid."

"There's a good chap," Sirius said, clapping James on the back. "Nice to see you're taking your promise to forget about Lily seriously."

'"Forget about Lily?'" Remus repeated, now looking up from his own potion with a skeptical expression.

James shrugged. "Time to move on," was all he said as he lazily fanned the smoke away.

"Time's up!" Slughorn bellowed from the front of the classroom. "Wands down!" He stepped down from the teaching platform and headed towards the back, planning to examine the Ravenclaws' work first.

"As you all should know, none of you have genuine Veritaserum in your cauldrons, but the glittering silvery substance is the second to last step before you have the real thing. Veritaserum takes a full moon cycle to mature into the signature clear, odorless liquid, but we don't provide the proper environment for that here because the production, distribution, and consumption of Veritaserum by minors is strictly prohibited by the Ministry."

All around them, students hastily added the last ingredients they could to their cauldrons followed by a few rushed stirs as Slughorn busied himself with the Ravenclaws. James plastered on a brilliant smile when Slughorn finished with them and bumbled his way towards the boys' workspace; James knew he must have looked absurd standing next to a pot whose smoke was thickening and darkening with each passing second.

"Ah, Mr. Potter," Slughorn began, looking warily into James' smoking cauldron from two meters away. "I take it you forgot to reduce the boil to a simmer before adding the belladonna root?"

"Uh…" James honestly had no idea where he had gone wrong. Between watching Snape and Lily and silently flirting with Delilah, he wasn't sure if he had given the instructions on the blackboard more than a fleeting glance.

"Because that would, of course, cook the delicate roots too quickly and result in the congealed mess you now have," Slughorn went on as if James hadn't spoken. "You usually do so well in Potions, Mr. Potter. That brain of yours must still be on holiday," he said with little chuckle. He continued around the room giving 'Oohs,' 'Ughs,' and the occasional inquisitive sniff as he passed each student table.

"Now, why am I not surprised!" Slughorn said cheerfully as he finally reached the front of the room again. James turned around to see the professor bending over Snape's cauldron, and he immediately tensed. Slughorn then gave Lily's potion a stir, looking utterly bewildered between the two.

"Of course, I should have expected nothing less from the two top students in the class," Slughorn beamed; James rolled his eyes and heard Sirius groan and Remus huff in annoyance behind him. "The potions are identical and perfect. I guess the only thing I can do is…"

The whole class seemed to hold its breath as Slughorn dragged out his dramatic pause in true fashion. James grew irritated as he looked from Snape's hungry expression to Lily's excited grin.

"…Award you both with a little Felix Felicis; equal prize for equal work," Slughorn announced jovially. He took out his wand and wordlessly conjured a second small flask already filled with the liquid gold. With a theatrical flourish, he handed a bottle each to his two favorite students.

"Wooooo!" squealed Keira, jumping around madly as Lily approached their table again, blushing slightly. James let himself smile through his frustration; leave it to Keira to always hoot and holler about something, even in the most inappropriate settings.

"Yes, congratulations to Mr. Snape and Miss Evans for their extraordinary work today," Slughorn said haltingly, looking sideways at Keira. "Now you all know what to do—please bottle a sample of your potion and leave it on the front table. And as for your homework, I want half a meter on the basic properties of Veritaserum, a summary of the Ministry's guidelines on the substance, and a commentary on said policy to be handed in at the next period. Good day!"

James worked hurriedly to gather a sample, made all the more difficult considering his potion had the consistency of mud. He just wanted to escape the classroom and have the day be over. Dinner was next, but he planned to skip it and have a quick fly on his broom to clear his mind. It was barely a week into school and already he was feeling stressed and disoriented, which had never happened.

He finally bottled a sad amount, grabbed his schoolbag, and started toward the front table, where Lily had just placed her own, Keira's, and Isabella's samples. James instantly avoided her eyes, another first, but still noticed her body stiffen and face pale as she passed the Slytherin table. Avery and Nott were chuckling darkly at Snape's sneer, and James felt his innate nature to protect Lily takeover despite his current exasperation with her. In two big steps, he had covered the distance between them.

"I hope we are not being too vulgar or cruel in front of the lady," James said through a tight smile. Through the corner of his eye, he saw Lily stop and face them. He couldn't discern her expression.

Avery smiled menacingly. "It's not cruel if it's the truth."

"Quite right," Snape said in a low, cool voice. "I was just saying that it's such a shame that so much intelligence and talent is wasted on a Mudblood. It won't mean anything soon enough."

James was lucky that Quidditch had given him such quick reflexes—he had his wand at Snape's throat before any of the three had even reached inside their robes. "Didn't you learn anything last June? You keep her name and that word out of your mouth."

"And didn't you?" Snape asked calmly, completely unperturbed by the stick jammed into his Adam's apple. "She never wanted _you_…saving her."

"MR. POTTER!" Slughorn shouted just as James pushed his wand in harder, forcing Snape to stumble back a couple steps into Avery. He could feel the entire class' stare on them now, but he didn't care. A hate the likes he had never felt before, even for Snape, was racing through him, and hexing the greasy prick seemed like the only reasonable course of action.

"Lower your wand, Mr. Potter," Slughorn demanded as he approached them. "Now!"

James stepped back immediately, just realizing how serious the scene must look.

"Explain yourself."

"He was threatening Lily; called her a Mudblood," James replied rather lamely as the bell rang.

Slughorn looked at him disbelievingly. "Mr. Snape threatening Miss Evans?" Slughorn scoffed. "I think not, and regardless, that does not give you the authority to attack another student."

"Then ask her!" James shouted before he could stop himself, seething with anger. Slughorn narrowed his eyes before turning to Lily.

"Miss Evans, is this true?"

James glanced up at her, but her face was blank. Keira's eyes were wide in shock, and Isabella looked bewildered.

"No, Professor," Lily finally said, glaring at Snape and then at James. "It's just Potter acting his usual, intimidating self."

"So there you have it," Slughorn said, ignoring Lily's last comment and rounding on James. "Physically threatening another student unprovoked? Detention, Mr. Potter, tomorrow evening at 7:00." He then turned with a huff and went into his office.

The door slammed loudly behind him, which seemed to snap people out of their daze of watching the altercation. People quickly gathered up their things and rushed out the classroom, whispering feverishly no doubt about what had just transpired.

James, however, was rooted to the spot, feeling as if the wind had been knocked out of him. He couldn't believe Lily would protect Snape after everything, just to spite him. Whatever Lily felt towards him, James, it was no reason to act so grudgingly. Forcing his wand on Snape was probably not the best way to go about it, he admitted to himself, but he only had the truest intentions. He was shaken out of his thoughts when Snape and his group pushed past him, chuckling maliciously.

He hastily grabbed his bag from the floor where he had dropped it and began making his way toward the door. Lily, Keira, and Isabella were still packing their bags and talking quietly. As if feeling his gaze, Lily looked up at him and smirked, but it quickly disappeared as James kept a steady glower. He had never felt so much anger toward Lily before and wanted nothing to do with her.

Pushing through the doors, he knocked into someone waiting in the corridor. With a half-hearted apology over his shoulder, he continued on, not seeing Remus or Sirius waiting for him to go to dinner.

"You okay, James?"

James turned around, not recognizing the voice. He was surprised to see Delilah standing there; she was the one he had bumped into.

"Uh, yeah," he said uncertainly, as she walked closer to him. He noticed her cheeks were very flushed. "Sorry again, about hitting you," he said sheepishly.

She shrugged. "It's okay; I understand that you're flustered. It's terrible what happened back there," she said sincerely. "I never really had a good impression of that Severus."

He smiled, trying to look unaffected. "It's fine. Detention is nothing new for me."

"So I've heard," she said with a laugh. "Were you heading down to dinner?"

"Yea—no," James corrected himself quickly. He was caught off guard by her directness, for it was usually only Gryffindor girls who approached him with such self-assurance; he liked this change. "I was actually going for a fly."

"Oh."

Her smile sagged only slightly, and before he could stop himself, James asked, "Do you want to come along?"

"Me? Go flying right now?" she said, looking shocked.

James nodded with a grin.

Delilah lowered her gaze to the floor with a worried look, and James knew her inner Ravenclaw, that was probably telling her to get her work done tonight, was fighting with her desire to do something impulsive, new, and fun. He had just the thing to let the latter win.

"Please?"

Her head snapped up—her eyes were wide and cheeks were pink.

"Alright…okay, I'll come."

"Great!" James exclaimed, grabbing her arm and heading towards the marble staircase. A few minutes later, they were just clearing the Entrance Hall when he heard his name called.

"Hey, Prongs!"

James turned and saw Sirius, Remus, and Peter waiting by the entrance to the Great Hall, all with questioning faces.

"I'll catch up with you guys later; I'm going for a fly," he said shortly before turning back to Delilah, who had a slightly discomfited look, and heading out the oak doors.

It was only an hour later when James steered his broom toward the stands and started his descent. The sun began to set quickly after he had summoned his broom and he and Delilah took off over the grounds. It was the getaway James had needed—the fresh air, though bitterly cold, rushing past them, Delilah's arms wrapped tight around his waist, and the freedom he desired after such a terrible end to the schoolday in Potions.

However, once the sky was dark and the sun gone, the temperature had dropped considerably. Delilah's convulsive shivers behind him had been the signal to return to the ground.

"Wow!" she exclaimed once she had steadied herself. Her cheeks were pink with cold, but her eyes were bright with excitement. She brushed her windswept hair out of her face before continuing.

"That was incredi—I've never flown over the entire grounds before—I don't fly much at all, actually—and with the sunset and everything…" She trailed off and looked at James, her dazzling grin turning into a sheepish smile. "I—you probably think I'm some twittering fool, jumping around like a child."

"No, no. Not at all," he said with a small laugh. He actually thought it was somewhat cute, but he wasn't going to admit that to her. "It's not surprising really. I mean, after first year flying lessons, most people don't see the need to fly much, unless they're on their House Quidditch team. Most people forget that flying is a free privilege."

"Yeah, that makes sense," she said, continuing to fix herself. "I really don't care much for Quidditch."

James gaped at her as if she had sprouted a second head. _This might be a problem_, he thought.

Delilah burst out laughing, filling the still night air around them. "I knew that would get a response out of you! You boys and your Quidditch—I meant playing, not watching, silly. I love watching the game, but I was never comfortable on a broom."

James let out a long breath, feeling relieved. "Yeah, I could tell you don't fly much; I thought you were trying to squeeze the life out of me back there," he said with a smirk.

She swatted his arm and pushed past him towards their bags on the stands without saying anything, but James was sure he had seen her blush. He ran a little to catch up with her and grabbed his bag.

"We should head back," she said, finally turning back towards him, her face it's natural color. "And sorry about that, the whole squeezing thing," she added once they head taken off towards the castle.

"It's alright," James said lightly. "I never said I didn't like it."

Delilah remained quiet, but James could discern her smile from the corner of his eye.

"You hungry?"

"Starving," she replied, and her stomach growled as if on cue. "But won't dinner be over?"

"Not a problem," James said as they made their way through the front doors.

The Entrance Hall was mostly empty, and he could see that the candles in the Great Hall had been dimmed. He led her to a small alcove near the hourglasses and rummaged in his bag for a minute before extracting his invisibility cloak. It was nowhere near curfew for sixth and seventh years, but that didn't mean there wouldn't be questions for a Ravenclaw and Gryffindor heading in the opposite direction of their respective common rooms.

"Is that an invisibility clo—"

"Yes, and shh, " he cut her off, shushing her gently. He pulled her closer to him, and a waft of some fresh flowery scent hit him. He took a deep breath, enjoying the fragrance, as he wrapped the cloak around them. "Stay close to me," he whispered, reaching an arm around her shoulders and steering her towards the basement door.

"Okay," she said hesitantly. "But isn't this the way to the Hufflepuff common room?"

"Yes, but trust me."

A few minutes later, they were in front of a large still painting of a fruit bowl. Though he knew no once was around, James looked up and down the corridor before removing the cloak and tickling the pear. It giggled girlishly before the painting swung back.

James grabbed Delilah's hand and pulled her into the large kitchens where the aroma of lamb chops, steak, and sausage still hung on the air. He felt his own stomach rumble.

"I had a feeling you were bringing me here, but didn't think—oh!" She gasped at the approaching house-elf who was scurrying towards them with an anxious look. She was wearing a navy tea towel and had round, light blue eyes.

"James Potter!" she squeaked when she stopped in front of them, giving a low bow. "How is you doing, sir? What can Tuli get for you?"

James smiled and gave a small bow himself. "I am doing well, Tuli. I would like you to meet Delilah Peterson," he said, gesturing towards Delilah, who was still wearing a bemused look.

"Good evening, Miss Delilah," Tuli greeted, turning to her. "Is there anything Tuli can get for you?"

"I—uh…" She stole a quick glance at James who shrugged and urged her on. "Some sandwiches would be fine and some juice."

"Right away!" Tuli said and bustled away.

James, still holding Delilah's hand, led her to the small table near the brick fireplace. As they sat down opposite each other, Tuli and 3 other house-elves had appeared with a platter of chicken and ham sandwiches, a plate of chips, a plate of éclairs and custard tarts, and jugs of pumpkin juice and water.

"Goodness!" Delilah said at the spread before them, once the house-elves had left them again. "I can't believe you know how to get down here, but Andy has always said you guys know most everything about the castle." She grabbed a sandwich and a handful of chips and began eating.

James, who was nearly halfway done with his first sandwich, however, stopped mid-chew. "And what else has Andy said about us?"

Delilah glanced up at him from her plate, looking worried at his tone. "Oh, no! I didn't mean it like that," she corrected herself. "He doesn't speak ill of you guys at all. He just says that with all of the pranking you guys do, it would make sense that you know all of Hogwarts' ins, outs, and secrets."

Andy—or Andrew—Cohen was the fifth Gryffindor boy in James' year. The Marauders did not know much about him since he spent most of the time with his twin brother, Adam, their cousin, Brianna, and their friends, who were all in Ravenclaw, since their first day of school. They got along fine with him, though, and the conversation came easy between them in the short times before heading to bed and after waking up in the mornings.

However, as careful as he and his friends were, it had once or twice crossed James' mind that Andy could know something about their secrets—maybe Andy had been awake a couple of those times they believed he was asleep behind his curtains and heard them planning their next adventure, or maybe he had realized what the Marauder's Map was in those few times that Peter had left it out by mistake. However, whatever he might or might not know, Andy had never confronted them.

"That name Sirius called you back there, 'Prongs' was it?" she asked him as she grabbed a custard tart. "Andy says you guys have these nicknames; is that yours?"

James nodded.

"Where does it come from?"

He grinned and shook his head. "Sorry, can't share that one with you quite yet."

"But you will?"

He scrutinized her for a moment, taking in the way the fire sparkled in her hazel eyes and highlighted the light dusting of freckles across her nose and cheeks, before saying, "Maybe."

Delilah smiled and looked away, reaching for the jug of pumpkin juice.

James continued to watch her, letting his mind wander. If this—this date, this little escape, whatever it was—turned into something more, would it ever get to the point where he would feel comfortable to tell her about their secrets? Would he let himself? After all, it wasn't only his secret to tell; it incriminated three other people, with Remus having the most to lose if anyone ever found out.

But that had not stopped him from fantasizing about letting it _slip_ that he was an unregistered Animagus. Most of these episodes had involved Lily, though, and telling her after a night of endless lovemaking; he would then transform and bask in her surprise, praise, and adoration…James shook his head and reined in his imagination. Lily would rather feed him to the Giant Squid than spend a minute alone with him, now more than ever.

And besides, he was getting too carried away just now. Delilah was not the first girl he had swept away for a fly across the grounds or had brought down to the kitchens for a late night bite. Although, he couldn't deny that for whatever reason, he was enjoying this time more than any other.

"Do you mind if we get going? I have a lot of work to get through."

Delilah's soft voice startled James out of his thoughts. She was staring at him with an amused expression.

"Did I lose you there?"

James shook his head. "No, no. Sorry about that. Just been a long day I guess."

He stood and stretched, and Delilah did the same. They grabbed their bags and headed for the portrait hole. James was just grabbing the picture to pull it open when Tuli came running up to them.

"Did Sir and Miss have a good time?"

"Yes, thank you very much for the food, Tuli," Delilah replied while James nodded his head.

"Delicious as always. Thanks, Tuli!"

Once in the corridor, James wrapped them again in his invisibility cloak, and they made their way towards the Entrance Hall. Once there, he put his cloak away. He glanced towards the oak front doors and thought about asking Delilah to take a walk, but curfew was only ten minutes away, and she was eager to get to work. He knew that their impromptu fly and trip to the kitchens was all the rebellion he was going to get out of her tonight.

A few minutes later, they had made it to the fifth floor and the entrance to Ravenclaw Tower. Once they reached the opening to the winding staircase, Delilah turned to James and smiled. He grinned back, and they stood staring at each other for a few silent seconds.

"Not too awkward of a silence," James finally said, caving in first.

Delilah laughed. "Not at all…thank you for the fun time," she said earnestly. "Hopefully—hopefully, it won't be the last time," she added, this time a little modestly.

"No, no. I am sure it won't be," James said, feeling a little nervous, something entirely new to him. He smiled and ruffled his hair anxiously, and before he realized what was happening, Delilah had covered the space between them and was planting a kiss on his cheek.

As she pulled back, he reached around to her back and drew her close again, kissing her softly on the lips. Only a second had passed before he pulled back and released her. His lips slightly tingled, and she was not the only one blushing this time. A few seventh year boys passing by wolf-whistled.

"Goodnight, James," she said coyly, barely above a whisper and ignoring the few students around them.

"Sweet dreams," he replied, giving her one last smile before heading back down the corridor, pulling back a tapestry, and hurriedly headed up the hidden stairway to the seventh floor.

James was sure that Remus, Sirius, and Peter were planning to bombard him with questions about the stunt he just pulled with Delilah as soon as he emerged in the common room, but even though he did have a good time with her, his only concern at this particular moment was devising some revenge for Snape and his cronies.

* * *

Sirius was distressed and so very, very tired.

The insomnia that plagued him on the first night back at Hogwarts had not relented. He guessed that in the past two weeks since then, he had only slept an average of four hours per night. The other hours were spent either staring up at his canopy with endless thoughts and nameless emotions running through his mind, or, when he couldn't stand lying idly anymore, in the common room, staring at the dying fire. James would sometimes join him down there, bringing a bottle of strong vodka that Mr. Potter had brought back after a business trip to Russia over the summer. Neither of them would say much, but Sirius was grateful for the company and knew that James understood.

The Slytherins were the cause for Sirius' distress. He and James noticed that something had changed within the older students in the past few days. There was a heightened sense of cautious excitement among them that resulted in tame but constant hexing of random students in other houses who weren't purebloods.

Mary Macdonald, however, had been on the receiving end of a particularly nasty curse while on her way to meet Charlie for an evening stroll. It was three days later, and Mary was still in the Hospital Wing with a large gash that ran from her collarbone to her left ear that refused to heal. There were a few rumors that Mulciber had been behind it, but there was no proof.

Sirius had even seen Regulus following Snape and Avery around like a sick puppy dog with a look of reverence towards them, which disturbed Sirius the most. He didn't have the slightest clue as to what was going on, but _something_ was happening, and if the Slytherins were happy, it meant bad news for everyone else.

"Siri? You okay?"

Daphne's cooing voice brought Sirius back to reality.

"What?"

"You just looked deep in thought, troubling thought," she said in what he guessed was her attempt at genuine concern. She raised her hand to smooth the wrinkle between his eyebrows with her thumb.

"Hmm," he answered noncommittally, swatting her hand away.

She lowered her head down to his ear, planting a kiss just below it and muttering in a husky voice, "Maybe I can help get your mind off of whatever is bothering you."

Sirius sighed loudly and closed his eyes in annoyance as she continued kissing down his jaw line. He remained unmoved, still lying on his back, his hands clasped under his head, and staring up at the ceiling of the Room of Requirement, where they had spent the last hour.

The décor of the room reflected his mood—dark and empty. There was no furniture, and the only light was that from the small fire in the hearth against the back wall. They were currently in the center of the room on top of a pile of blankets and cushions, wrapped in a tangle of sheets damp with sweat.

Sirius wondered if Daphne had noticed the obvious difference between this room and the previous versions he had imagined for them, with dark wood walls and floors as well, but also with a large, plush bed and small tables with chocolates and wine. Knowing Daphne, he assumed that she probably had realized, but remained quiet on the subject, not wanting to confront what it might mean.

His eyes shot open as she moved her lips down his neck and let her hands wander down his stomach, her nails grazing lightly. His stomach clenched in response, and he let out a long breath as her hands continued under the sheet covering his bottom half. He shut his eyes tight, desperately trying to keep himself from giving in again, but despite his best efforts, he felt his blood rush as Daphne's mouth moved lower and lower down his torso.

It was not as if sex with her was terrible, but what little passion that had existed between them was gone long ago, for Sirius at least, and sex had been nothing but a physical release for him since the beginning of summer. However, even that aspect of it was becoming less and less enjoyable since returning to school.

Every time he had tried to breakup with Daphne, her roaming hands and lips led his mind astray. After all, he was only a randy sixteen-year-old boy, and, despite her faults, Daphne _was_ a very beautiful girl with a gorgeous body who was so very willing to do anything to please him. Though even Sirius knew that something was off when he grew sick with himself every time he collapsed onto the bed, completely spent, and his excuses weren't cutting it anymore.

"Stop!" he said suddenly, rising up slightly and grabbing her shoulders just as her lips moved past his belly button.

Daphne looked up, her eyes full of concern. "Why? What's the matter?"

"Everything," he muttered under his breath as he sat up. Daphne rose up and sat on her knees, looking uneasy as if she had done something wrong.

They stared at each other silently for a moment—Sirius taking in her green eyes, which seemed darker than usual, her slightly swollen red lips, and her dark brown hair that fell past her shoulders. He let his gaze drop to her neck and continued down the path his hands had followed so many times, across her delicate collar bone, around her full breasts and past her smooth stomach. As his eyes travelled further, he closed his eyes again and bit the inside of his bottom lip.

"What?" she snapped, forcing Sirius' attention back to her face. She was now glaring at him, hastily grabbing for a sheet and wrapping it around her, but her now shaking voice betrayed her. "What do you mean 'everything?'"

Sirius sighed, feeling slightly disgusted with himself again.

"I mean about us. It's not work—"

"ATTENTION!"

Daphne let out a small scream and pulled the sheet around her more tightly, looking wildly around the room. Even Sirius had jumped a little at Professor McGonagall's magically amplified voice that reverberated against the walls and, he assumed, throughout the rest of the castle below.

"ALL STUDENTS ARE TO REPORT TO THE GREAT HALL IMMEDIATELY. PREFECTS AND THE HEAD BOY AND GIRL ARE TO ENSURE THIS IS DONE IN A TIMELY AND CALM MANNER."

Sirius and Daphne looked bewildered at each other for a split second before moving hurriedly. Daphne scrambled for her clothes within the sheets while Sirius summoned his own clothes and James' invisibility cloak. They dressed quickly before Sirius wrapped the cloak around them, and they headed toward the door.

Sirius opened the door slowly, but no one was in the corridor. The inhabitants of the portraits around them were rushing in and out of neighboring paintings asking one another if they knew what was happening.

"Come on," he whispered, and they walked swiftly down the corridor.

After rounding a second corner, they ran into the flow of students coming from the Gryffindor common room, all chatting excitedly. Sirius and Daphne merged behind a group of fourth year girls. After reaching the fifth floor, the stream of students swelled as the Ravenclaws joined them on the main staircase.

"Act natural," Sirius said quietly before stealthily removing the cloak and balling it up. No one gave them a second glance.

Within a few minutes, they were entering the Great Hall where most of the Hufflepuffs and Slytherins were already seated.

"You should sit with your friends," Sirius suggested as they reached the Gryffindor table. She nodded and walked around to the other side where her friends were giggling madly once they took in her appearance. They glanced at Sirius and burst into giggles again before putting their heads together.

Sirius rolled his eyes and continued down the table, finding James and Peter sitting near Isabella, Keira, and Jane.

Peter sniggered as soon as Sirius sat next to him and across from James; James, however, looked revolted.

"Ugh, I hope you at least finished before McGonagall's voice came up," he said, jerking his head down the table toward Daphne.

"Shut it," Sirius mumbled. "At least _I'm_ getting some these days." He heard Jane huff moodily somewhere to his left, but he ignored it.

James shrugged. "I may be moving slowly with Delilah, but at least it's with someone I'm actually interested in."

"Yeah, yeah, but you're still—"

"Hey guys," Remus greeted, panting slightly and sitting next to James. They hadn't noticed him approach. Sirius looked over and saw that Lily was also just settling in next to Isabella.

"Lily and I had to gather up the Gryffindor stragglers," Remus continued before any of them could ask.

"Any idea what is going on?" Sirius asked.

Remus shook his head. "No idea. We were sitting in the common room when the announcement came; we were just as shocked as, uh, you must have been," he said with a smirk.

"—to St. Mungo's?" shrieked a voice to his left.

Sirius and the rest whipped their heads around to find Keira now covering her mouth with her hand and looking fearfully at Lily. Jane also looked worried, but Isabella looked puzzled.

"It's the Wizarding hospital in London," Lily explained to Isabella, and the latter clapped her hand to her mouth in shock as well.

"Oh yeah," Remus said, calling the boys' attention back to him. "McGonagall just pulled Lily and me aside and told us that Mary will be transferred to St. Mungo's later tonight."

"But why?" Peter asked, now looking anxious too.

"There's nothing more Madam Pomfrey can do for her here, and she's still unconscious. According to McGonagall, she needs advanced observation and treatment," Remus explained.

"QUIET!"

Professor McGonagall's amplified voice sounded again through the Great Hall, silencing the students at once. Everyone was now looking at the staff table where all of Hogwart's staff was now standing as if presenting a united front. The only person missing was Dumbledore.

"The information I am about to share with you is very important," she began in a lower voice, standing in the center of the line, "so I demand your undivided attention." She then took a deep breath, as if steeling herself for the worst.

"There has been an occurrence in Diagon Alley, an attack." She paused, her eyes sweeping across the crowd, but Sirius saw that no one looked concerned at this announcement.

"Earlier this evening," she continued, "a Dark wizard calling himself Lord Voldemort Apparated into the center of the marketplace with a large number of his followers calling themselves the Death Eaters. From there, they began to attack groups of witches and wizards seemingly at random. A majority of the curses and resulting injuries were mild, but I will not lie to you: a considerable number of Unforgivable Curses were cast as well, including the Cruciatus and—" she swallowed hard "—and Killing Curses."

And there it was, the reaction she had been anticipating. All throughout the Great Hall, people were gasping and whispering hurriedly. A number of girls already had tears shining in their eyes.

Sirius glanced behind him to the Slytherin table and saw the older students staring at McGonagall with rapt interest, waiting for her to continue. A few of them he noticed—Mulciber, Dolohov, Snape, and Avery in particular—were trying desperately to suppress their grins. His blood began to boil as he turned back around and caught James' eye. They shared a loaded look that Sirius took to say, "It's begun."

"Hit Wizards and Aurors arrived on the scene within minutes, but it being a Saturday, Diagon Alley was busier than normal, resulting in a great number of victims," McGonagall continued, trying to talk over the growing level of noise.

"Unfortunately, none of the masked attackers were captured. At this moment, Lord Voldermort's intentions, his objectives, are unknown—"

"Bullshit!" Sirius spat angrily under his breath.

"Oh come on, Padfoot," James whispered in response. "Of course they _know_, but think about all the Muggle-borns and half-bloods in here right now. She can't stand up there and say 'Lord Voldemort believes that only pureblood wizards should exist and wants to kill all others' without there being a panic among them. It's the whole ignorance is bliss attitude."

"Yeah, but for how long?" Sirius asked, still angry. "There are wizards in this castle who have been deluded by this Voldemort idiot and are carrying out his same actions as we speak. People have to know."

James shook his head. "You're overreacting. Those Slytherins may be deluded but they're not going around throwing Unforgivables at random students. They know better than to try any of that."

"What about Mary? That was nasty bit of Dark magic she suffered."

"Shh!"

James and Sirius looked around to see Lily glaring between them with a finger at her lips. They both rolled their eyes and turned back to each other about to resume their argument when Remus cut in.

"How do you know all of this?"

"My dad's known about him for a while," James explained. "Lord Voldemort has been working underground for a while, making himself known only to pureblood families that hold the same beliefs which he knew he could trust. His growing power is the main reason they brought in Isabella's dad."

"—and there has been no evidence to suggest that Lord Voldemort plans to attack Hogsmeade or the school, but regardless, there will be updated security measures posted around the castle within the next few days—"

"But you and Sirius are purebloods!" Peter whispered frantically. "What are you worried about?"

"Are you serious, Wormtail?" James asked with disbelief, adding "Shut it" before Sirius could open his mouth. "It doesn't matter if we're pureblood when my dad is Head Auror and Sirius cursed his family and ran away from home. We're considered blood-traitors, just as bad as Muggle-borns in his eyes."

Sirius took a deep breath, remembering something he had overheard his parents saying months ago.

"And Volemort is not only about pure wizard blood, but also pure _human_ blood as well," he said in a low voice with a significant look at Remus. "Half-breeds are on his list as well."

Remus paled for only a second before collecting himself. "This is all frightening to hear, I admit, but really, this is only the first attack. He could easily be tracked down and apprehended within the next week. We're not exactly at war here."

James shrugged. "True. I guess we will have to just wait and see," he sighed, and whether he meant to or not, Sirius saw him glance toward Lily.

"—and that is all the information I can give you tonight. Please return to your respective common rooms at once. Prefects, please facilitate, and I would like the Head Boy and Girl to stay behind for a quick word. If any students have had family injured in today's attack, you will be called individually to speak with your Head of House. Goodnight." Professor McGonagall finished with a curt nod before turning to the other professors and talking quietly.

Remus left quickly with Lily to lead the younger Gryffindors back to the tower. The rest of them moved slowly, letting everyone else leave in front of them. They remained silent on the long trek back to common room.

Once they reached the common room, Sirius wasn't surprised to see that most students had not gone to bed, despite the late hour. They were all chatting hastily in apprehensive and incredulous tones. He, James, and Peter joined Remus, who was sitting close to the fire with Jane, Lily, Isabella, and Keira.

"And what else did your dad tell you?" Keira was asking Isabella when the boys settled themselves in armchairs around the group.

"That's it," Isabella said in a quiet voice. Sirius could see her eyes shone with unshed tears, but the rest of her face remained hard. "Voldemort is all about pureblood; he believes that no one else deserves the privilege of having magical knowledge." She then looked at Keira and Jane. "But you already know this, don't you? You told me you had heard about him on the train."

"Your parents support this maniac?" Lily almost yelled, looking accusingly at them.

"Of course not! Do you think my parents would have invited you to stay during summer if they did?" Keira asked, trying to stay calm. "Voldemort's followers approached our parents, but they don't believe in that sort of rubbish. But…but Jane and I do have _some_ relatives who believe it, and they support him." Her voice was barely audible towards the end.

"I…of course they wouldn't have…I'm sorry," Lily said sheepishly; her cheeks were flushed.

"It's fine; don't worry about it," Keira said, waving her hand dismissively.

They all remained silent for a while. Remus, Peter, and Isabella were gazing absentmindedly into the fire, while Lily was ringing her hands and staring at the floor. James kept shooting surreptitious looks her way. Keira and Jane were also staring off in random directions, but kept sharing significant looks before turning quickly away.

Sirius considered this for a moment. Like all purebloods, he was distantly related to Keira and Jane and wondered just who in their family were supporters of Voldemort. Could some of them have been Death Eaters in the Diagon Alley attack?

He leaned in toward them and kept his voice low. "Who exactly in your fam—"

But he fell silent, as did everyone else in the common room, at the sound of the portrait creaking open and McGonagall walking in. She stopped for just a second, taking in the scene before her, before continuing briskly across the room. She halted right in front of their group.

"Miss Williams, please come with me."

They all held their breath as they watched Isabella standup. She didn't say a word, but Sirius noticed that her hands were clenched in fists.

"We'll be here when you get back," Lily whispered reaching for Isabella's arm, tears now gleaming in her own eyes.

Isabella nodded before taking off behind McGonagall. She glanced back at James before finally exiting through the portrait hole.

"They're fine, I know it," James said, more to himself than anyone else. "Our dads are among the best trained out there…" He trailed off, staring back into the fire.

Sirius' heart clenched for his best friend, whose name could be called next, and for Isabella, whom he barely knew, but whom he thought was suffering the most out of all of them. He didn't care what Remus said—he believed this was just the beginning of the Wizarding world's worst days, and this was only the first of many nights that would be spent this way.

"Siri?"

Sirius groaned inwardly at the approaching Daphne. He heard Peter snigger beside him.

"What?" he asked, finally looking up at her, but she was glaring down at Jane, who was glaring right back at her.

"I was just thinking that we should get away; you know, continue our earlier engagement," she said, tearing her eyes away from Jane and looking at him suggestively.

"Now is not a good time," Sirius said flatly.

"But we—"

"Later," he cut harshly across her.

A frown appeared and disappeared on her face in less than two seconds.

"Well…okay," she said sweetly with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Maybe tomorrow." She turned on her heel and left without waiting for a response.

"Blabbering twit," Jane scoffed under her breath, and Sirius agreed silently.

He closed his eyes and sighed heavily, growing annoyed with himself. Between another failed attempt at breaking up with Daphne and Voldemort's long-feared first public appearance, _this_ would rival among the worst nights of his life.


	6. When It Rains, It Pours

The harsh rain pounding against the dormitory windows was keeping Isabella wide-awake, but she was grateful for it. She had slept for only two hours, but they were two long, agitated hours filled with disturbing images of masked men in long cloaks and Voldemort, who she imagined looked like Frankenstein's monster, descending upon the castle. She couldn't remember having such a restless night since the day she found out her mother was dead.

It was hard to believe that not even a day had passed since the Diagon Alley attack. It seemed like days ago that she was returning to Gryffindor Tower after meeting with Professor McGonagall, feeling slightly relieved.

Derrick had suffered only minor injuries—a few cuts and a couple of awful burns on his arms. More or less held true for James' father, which she and the rest of the group learned when he returned to the common room twenty minutes after she had told him that McGonagall wanted to see him.

However, as worried as they were, she and James soon realized that they were the lucky ones. Six more Gryffindors were called after them, with four of them having relatives who were seriously injured and currently hospitalized in St. Mungo's.

Isabella just couldn't believe it was all happening. Her father had been warning her all summer of what lay ahead of them, but she didn't think it would be happening so soon. It was barely a month into the school year and already students were being sent home to see their wounded relatives.

With a heavy sigh, Isabella sat up and opened her curtains, not wanting to lie there consumed in her thoughts anymore. She was alarmed to see that she wasn't the only one awake at such a late hour.

Lily was sitting against her pillows with her knees pulled tight to her chest, her bed hangings wide open. Although the only light was from the dying fire near the door, from her appearance Isabella guessed that Lily hadn't slept a wink.

"You can't sleep either?" Lily asked, turning to face her with an uncomfortable smile.

Isabella shook her head. "Too much to think about. What's on your mind?"

Lily suddenly stood and quickly joined Isabella on her bed. Now that Lily was closer, Isabella could see that she had been crying. Her eyes were red and puffy.

"Merlin, Lily, what's the matter?"

Her chin began to tremble and she shook her head, covering her face with her hands. Isabella wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, feeling a bit awkward. She had only known Lily for a few weeks; they weren't exactly best friends.

"Just take a couple of deep breaths," Isabella said soothingly, as Lily's whole body began to shake with silent sobs.

After a few quiet minutes, Lily finally calmed down and pulled away from Isabella. She rubbed her face harshly and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Thank you," she said with another deep breath.

Isabella smiled. "It's okay, but what's wrong?"

"Everything," Lily mumbled, shaking her head again. "It's just all hit me tonight. I mean, you all—you, James, Sirius, Keira, Jane—all had warning of this. I guess Severus had tried to warn me…" she trailed off, speaking more to herself.

"Severus? You mean that Snape boy?"

Lily nodded. "He and I used to be close friends until…well, there were a few things that led to the end of our friendship, but before then, he was always telling me how many people believed that only purebloods deserved to live in the Wizarding world, that these same people were organizing to get rid of the 'others'…but that I would get a 'pass' because I was so talented," she said, her voice steadily growing angrier by the second.

"And now this Lord Vol-Voldemort is here, and I'm in the group of his primary victims," she cried, and Isabella knew that she was trying her hardest not to sound too self-absorbed, but couldn't blame her for being afraid for herself.

"People are being attacked outside and even inside the castle now," Lily continued, her voice still quivering, and they both automatically looked to Mary's empty bed. Isabella wasn't sure that with all of tonight's chaos if her transfer to St. Mungo's had been postponed.

"Who knows what's going to happen next. It's frightening to think about what's out there waiting to attack," Lily finished quietly, still staring at Mary's bed.

Isabella sighed. "You're right, Lily, but we can't sit here fearing for something that may never come."

"But—"

"I know that the immediate future looks grim, but we're only 16-years-old and have our whole lives ahead of us," Isabella cut across her, trying not to think about her own fear. "We can't do much from here while we are still in school. And don't forget, the rest of us you named are in just as much danger as you are. We're all blood-traitors—me, James, and Sirius in particular—and that makes us just as dispensable as Muggle-borns in Voldemort's eyes. Just know that you are not alone in your fear.

"We still have two years of school left, and all we can do is continue to hold true to our beliefs and learn as much as we can, so that if this is all still going on when we enter the real world, we can fight it head on."

"Thanks," Lily said after a short silence, smiling genuinely. "You make perfect sense…"

"But you're still scared, huh?"

Lily nodded.

"Yeah, me too."

They grinned guiltily at each other.

"It's just the initial shock," Isabella promised. "I'm not saying for us to be foolishly ignorant, but we can't sit in our rooms all day and fret. Like I said, we're only sixteen; we need to allow ourselves to have a little fun."

Lily suddenly stood and stretched. "Good point, but right now I think what both of us need is a dreamless sleeping potion," she said, trying to stifle a yawn.

Isabella also yawned, beginning to feel tired again, but she wasn't exactly sleepy. If she tried to go to sleep, she knew she would lie awake for a couple more restless hours.

"Sounds great, but where are we going to get a dreamless draught at—" she glanced at the clock on her bedside table "—2:30 in the morning?"

Lily didn't answer; she was at the foot of her bed, bent over, and rummaging through her trunk. After a few seconds, she straightened up and was holding a large, highly-polished dark wood box. As Lily came closer, Isabella squinted her eyes to read the small gold plaque beneath the lid's clasp.

She smiled when she finally read: _Traveling Potion Kit._

"Now why am I not surprised?" Isabella drawled with a grin, mocking Professor Slughorn from a couple of weeks before.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Slughorn gave a gift to everyone who came to his Christmas party last year. Severus got one of these too. He thought we would make the most of them."

She placed the heavy but elegant box on Isabella's bed and lifted the lid. "Do you think you'll go to his next get-together?"

Isabella shrugged and mumbled noncommittally. She had received an invitation to join the Slug Club during the first week of class but decided that responding to her father's letter would be a better use of her time.

"Hmm…" Lily murmured, looking through the kit. She glanced up at Keira and Jane's beds and then the near extinguished fire. "This is going to be a bit noisy and we need more light. Let's head downstairs."

A moment later, they were shuffling down the stairs, Lily trying to convince Isabella to join her at the next Slug Club meeting.

"Okay, okay," Isabella finally relented. "I'll go but—"

"Shh…" Lily pointed over toward the roaring fire. "There's already someone over there."

Isabella looked closer and saw that there was indeed someone sitting in the armchair closest to the fire.

They slowly crept over before Lily came to an abrupt halt.

"Oh no," she whispered, turning around quickly. "Let's go back—OUCH!"

In her haste to get back to the staircase, Lily stubbed her toe against a leg of a homework table, almost dropping her kit in the process.

"Evans?"

"Shit," Lily groaned. Isabella grinned sympathetically, recognizing the voice at once.

"Evans, is that you? Isabella?"

Lily straightened her back and turned to face James head on. Isabella turned as well and felt her cheeks burn—he was wearing only an undershirt and boxers.

"Yes, it's us," Lily said coolly. "What are you doing down here?"

"I could ask the same of you."

"I asked first," Lily countered.

"What does it matter?" asked a new voice from behind James. Sirius suddenly came into view, standing up from the sofa that was opposite James' chair. Isabella slightly jumped at his appearance and brusque voice, and even worse, he was wearing only boxers.

Isabella and Lily shared a side-glance, and Isabella assumed they were thinking the same thing: why hadn't they taken the few extra seconds to grab their dressing gowns? Neither of them was wearing a bra under their sleeping shirts, and their shorts were much shorter than they would normally wear outside their dormitory.

"Well?"

Isabella looked back over to James, who had his arms folded across his chest. The tension between him and Lily was palpable. This was the first time they had spoken since the incident in Potions.

"We couldn't sleep," Isabella finally said, hoping to dissolve some of the strain.

James slumped from his defensive stance with a sigh. "Join the club."

"You too?" Lily asked in a softer voice.

James and Sirius curtly nodded and resumed their previous seats without another word.

Isabella glanced at Lily with a questioning look, and the latter nodded. They headed over to the boys, and Lily sat on an ottoman with her back to the fire and placed her box on floor next to her, while Isabella sat on the opposite end of Sirius' sofa. She noticed a large and near-empty bottle of clear liquid near Sirius' feet and frowned.

Apparently, Lily had noticed it too. "I should report you for that," she said, jerking her chin toward the bottle.

"For what?" James demanded, his voice hardening again. "There are no rules explicitly prohibiting the _consumption_ of alcoholic beverages. Believe me, we've checked." He then reached down, grabbed the bottle from the floor, and took a pull, glaring at Lily as if daring her to say something.

"Besides," he continued after wiping his mouth, "it's not as if we're drunkenly stumbling around the castle."

"Still no reason to get bladdered," Lily said with a disgusted air, eying the bottle as if it had personally offended her.

"Who says we're getting bladdered?" James asked. "It's just our way of dealing with our insomnia."

"There are better ways to cope with insomnia," Lily said, reaching down and patting the top of her kit as if it were a dog.

James rolled his eyes. "Right, because everyone happens to have a travel-sized, fully-equipped potion kit on them at all—"

"Will you two give it a rest already!" Sirius snapped.

James and Lily both glared at Sirius before turning back to each other and resuming their argument.

Sirius sighed, and Isabella tried to suppress a laugh.

"Don't worry, you'll get used to it."

Isabella looked over to see Sirius facing her with a grumpy expression.

"Yeah, but how long will it take?" she asked, still laughing a little. "Remember, you've already endured five years of it."

Sirius looked thoughtful for a second. "I guess you're right. I can't remember when I finally learned to tune them out," he said. He then grinned at Isabella. "I guess you're shit out of luck unless they finally put their differences aside and just go out."

"Fat chance," Isabella muttered and looked at Lily, who was red in the face. She and James were now arguing about the prank he and his friends pulled on Snape and Avery last weekend. They had charmed all the suits of armor and statues to kick, blow raspberries, punch, and throw rotten crocodile hearts—which Peter had stolen from the Potions supply room—at the Slytherins whenever either walked by. The amount of deep bruises and cuts Snape and Avery received by the end of the day had forced them to go to the Hospital Wing.

"Right again," Sirius said, glancing quickly at James. "I've never seen him go this long without asking her out for a couple of years now." He then shrugged and looked back to Isabella. "So why can't you sleep?"

Isabella sighed. "Everything we've heard tonight; it keeps running through my mind," she said. "I have a feeling that this is only the beginning."

Sirius gave her a skeptical look. "This can't be the first _you've_ heard of it all."

"It's not," Isabella confirmed, "but it's all out there now, isn't it? There was some hope that Voldemort wouldn't gain enough power and support to actually start terrorizing everyone."

"I know it's frightening to think about, but we can't put our lives on hold because of it," he said confidently.

Isabella was slightly taken aback. She didn't know much about Sirius, but her roommates had told her a bit about his history over the past few weeks—how he was from a very ancient and elitist pureblood family, how he had been the first Black in many, many generations to be Sorted outside of Slytherin, and how he had run away from home this past summer after no longer being able to endure his family's discriminatory beliefs. She had realized that besides James, she was the first to see him the day he left his home.

The girls had also mentioned that his characteristic cocky attitude had been missing since the start of school, making Isabella wonder where his confidence now was coming from.

_Must be the alcohol_, she thought.

"I agree," Isabella finally said with slightly narrowed eyes, still considering him. "That's what I was explaining to Lily earlier. She's pretty upset too."

"Then why are you still letting it bother you so much?"

"To be completely honest," she began hesitantly, "it's just that I've already lost my mother to this Dark magic crap."

"Your mother?"

Isabella nodded, wondering if she had the strength to start heading down this path in the conversation. She looked straight into Sirius' eyes and was surprised to find them clear and sincerely concerned, not the drunken cloudiness she was expecting.

"My mother was here visiting with family earlier this year. I don't know the exact details, but—" Isabella felt her throat constrict "—I guess Death Eaters were in the area for whatever reason, trying to recruit families or…I'm not sure exactly, but in the end she was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

Sirius stared at her for a moment with an expression that Isabella could not discern. She thought there was maybe a hint of disbelief or even pity.

"I just don't want to lose my father too," Isabella finished quietly, trying not to worry about what the look on Sirius' face meant.

"And especially when he's sacrificing himself for a people, a country he barely identifies with?" Sirius asked in a low voice.

Isabella looked past him and nodded imperceptibly, feeling terribly ashamed. This discomforting thought had been gnawing at the back of her mind since the day Derrick approached her with the news about the job opportunity. Yes, her mother was British and her father respected her heritage, but Estelle hadn't lived here for years after leaving St. Mungo's, and she was always reluctant to return considering how much her family didn't like Derrick. The fact that someone else had voiced it for her made her feel even worse.

"You don't have to feel selfish for thinking it," Sirius said, as if reading her thoughts. "It's only natural to want to keep yourself and your family as far away from danger as possible."

He moved a little closer to Isabella, forcing her to look at him, and she felt an odd jolt surge through her body.

"But you have to know that a takes an extraordinary type of man with an even more remarkable sense of dedication to do what your father is doing now," Sirius continued. "He doesn't want your mother to have died in vain, and I am sure you don't either."

Isabella closed her eyes, willing the tears not to fall, especially in front of Sirius, who was still a relative stranger. In the Arithmancy classes they had together, their exchanges had contained no more than simple 'Hellos' and 'See you laters' before and after class.

However, despite their previous lack of interaction, she felt very comfortable with him now and was grateful for his words. She knew Sirius was right; it was just going to take her a little longer to fully accept it.

With a shuddering breath, she opened her eyes and saw that he had been staring intently at her. She gave him a watery smile. "Thanks," she said.

"Glad to help. I _have _been trying to learn from Remus, you know," Sirius said with cheeky grin.

Isabella raised her eyebrows in question, knowing that he was trying to lighten the mood.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Remus is the one good with feelings, common sense, and all that rubbish," he said with a sneer.

With a small laugh, Isabella replied, "It's a good thing one of you has some sense of—"

"—piss off, Potter!" Lily shrieked. She and James were both on their feet now, staring angrily at each other. James was wielding the vodka bottle around in his right hand. Isabella wondered when exactly she had tuned out their row but was exasperated to hear that it had come back full circle to sleeping potion versus alcohol.

"Just have a little, Evans," James teased, shaking the bottle in front of her face. "Don't waste your time on that potion."

"Better to waste my time than to be drunken fool."

"No one is asking you to be one," James said irritably. "Honestly, I assume you are a lightweight. A couple of swigs from this bottle and you'll be out in less time than it would take for you to just organize the ingredients to start that stupid potion."

Lily scoffed.

"Oh come on, Evans. Stop being such a pru—"

"Fine!" Lily yelled, snatching the bottle from his weaving hand. Before anyone could react, she took three large gulps before pulling it away and wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Ugh! That's awful!" she finally said, looking down at the bottle with repulsion.

The other three stared at her silently for a moment before Isabella caught sight of James and sniggered. He was looking at Lily with his jaw dropped, as if just seeing her clearly for the first time.

Sirius stood quickly and clapped James hard on the back. "Yep! It takes some getting used to, doesn't it Prongs?" he asked heartily.

"Uh...uh, yeah," James stammered, still looking dumbfounded. "Awful, awful stuff. But—but that was incredible, Evans!"

Lily looked back up at James, her glare returning. "Then I hope you'll be able to remember it well because that is the last time that is ever happening, especially with you around." She then turned to Isabella, and in another shocking move, held out the bottle. "Here, it will put us to sleep quickly."

Isabella looked wearily at the vodka. She had only drunk hard liquor once in her life: at the beginning of this past summer at an end-of-the-year party the Merlin boys had thrown. The morning after five shots of rum had made her stay away from anything with alcohol until her and Derrick's farewell party.

"I thought we were going for a dreamless sleep, not necessarily quick."

"You don't have to worry about any bad dreams with this stuff," James promised.

"Yeah, in fact, this will give you some of the most satisfying and vivid dreams and visions you could imagine," Sirius added with a wink.

"And besides," Lily chimed in, her words already slurring a bit, "if you want the potion, you're going to have to do it yourself. I'm knackered." She fell heavily back onto the ottoman.

Isabella caught Sirius' eye, and they both pursed their lips to keep from laughing.

"Alright, alright. I guess it can't be that bad," Isabella conceded. She grabbed the bottle from Lily's hand and took 2 long swigs. It burned going down her throat, and she coughed a little.

After a short pause she said, "I am going to have to agree with you, Lily. That is definitely not happening again."

Lily grinned lazily back at her, and Isabella took this as their cue. The vodka was now burning in her stomach, and she knew that she would soon be feeling it seeing as how they hadn't eaten in over eight hours.

She gently placed the bottle on the floor and stood, swaying slightly. "Ready, Lily?"

Nodding, Lily also stood a little shakily, and she immediately reached for Isabella's arm. Once steadied, Lily's back went rigid, and she walked right past the boys, who had separated to allow her to pass, with only a simple "Goodnight." They watched her disappear up the stairway, Sirius looking amused and James frowning.

Isabella shook her head with a smile and picked up the forgotten potion kit from the floor.

"Well, thanks for the company and the, uh, sleeping aid," she said as she walked past the boys.

"Anytime," James muttered, looking dejected. He turned and dropped back into his armchair. Sirius, however, followed her for a few steps.

Isabella was at the base of the stairs before turning around in question.

"Would you like some help getting back up?" Sirius asked with a smile.

"No, I think I will be fine," Isabella assured him with a small laugh. She was having a difficult time keeping her eyes on his face and not his bare chest. "Did you learn that one from Remus as well?"

"Nope, that one I learned entirely on my own," he said cheekily.

"Figures."

"Couldn't hurt to ask," Sirius said with a shrug. "Goodnight, Isabella."

"Goodnight."

When Isabella emerged in the dormitory a moment later, she found Lily sprawled across her bed but not yet asleep. Isabella sat the kit at the foot of Lily's bed before stumbling to her own, tripping on the carpet and falling face first, the top of her head knocking against the headboard.

"Ouch," she mumbled feebly into her pillows.

"You should watch where you're going there, you lush."

Isabella rolled over to face Lily, who was grinning foolishly.

"You're one to talk." They both then burst into a fit of giggles.

"Remind me to never, ever drink vodka again," Lily begged after calming down. "Promise me you will."

"I promise," Isabella slurred. "But only if you do the same."

"Right-o," Lily replied, and her breathing became slow and steady.

They were silent for a while, and Isabella's mind raced with the conversation she had with Sirius.

"I really, really hate Potter," Lily suddenly mumbled. Isabella could hear her ruffling and settling within her sheets and comforter.

"I know," Isabella sighed. She really wanted to sleep and wished Lily would stop the drunken babbling.

"He's just insufferable."

"Very much so, but we can complain some more tomorrow," Isabella said with a yawn, her eyelids flickering.

"Hmm...ok." There was a small pause. "Goodnight, and thanks for everything…earlier, I mean."

"Don't…don't mention it," Isabella said sleepily, and she finally let her heavy lids close.

A half-naked Sirius lounging across the couch was the first thing she saw, and her eyes snapped open in embarrassing shock.

"It's only the alcohol," she reassured herself in a whisper as she sat up and closed her bed curtains harshly as if her roommates could see what she was seeing. However, the moment she settled back into her covers and closed her eyes again, Sirius returned in all of his half-naked glory, and Isabella fell asleep with a smile at her lips.

* * *

The bleak sunlight that shone at dawn was now gone, and Isabella glared up at the dark storm clouds as she sat down to breakfast with a heavy sigh. It had been over two weeks since the Diagon Alley attack, and the weather, along with the mood of the castle, progressively worsened as October trudged on.

Since the attack, many students had taken out subscriptions for the _Daily Prophet_, including Isabella, to stay abreast of the goings-on outside of school, and everyday it was filled with nothing but miserable news and useless safety tips from the Ministry.

Worst of all, an article was published a week ago revealing that Voldemort's vision was that of a pureblood Wizarding community by any means necessary, scaring the non-pureblood students into panic, just what McGonagall had been trying to avoid and James had predicted. Many of them now required calming and dreamless sleep draughts on a regular basis, and four students, whose parents had caught wind of Mary Macdonald's hospitalization, were pulled from school indefinitely.

The morning post entered just as Isabella started on her waffles. Little flecks of water fell on them all, signaling that the impending rain was finally falling. Isabella gave the delivery owl five Knuts and shooed it away, but she didn't bother opening the paper. She was simply sick of reading it, as was everyone else around her. Lily was the only one who read it immediately upon arrival, and her reaction indicated whether the rest would leave reading it until a particularly boring lecture later on in the day.

"Oh my gosh!" Lily gasped. Apparently, this wouldn't be one of those days.

"That bad, Lily?" Remus asked as he reached for his copy. She nodded quickly without looking up.

Isabella sighed resignedly and grabbed her copy. Her eyes were immediately drawn to the image right below the headline. There was a large skull with a snake protruding from its mouth set against the night sky; both looked to be made out of twinkling stars.

_**Voldemort's Mark Revealed**_

_In the recent weeks since the Diagon Alley assault, unsuspecting members of the Wizarding community were shocked and frightened upon returning home with the previously unknown symbol, seen in the accompanying picture, set in the sky above. Inside, they would find an array of damage—from simple ransacking to injured family members, and in two confirmed cases, even murder._

_In an exclusive to the _Daily Prophet_, Ministry officials are now confirming the already rampant rumor—that this mark belongs to Lord Voldemort and his followers, the Death Eaters._

__

"The mark has been set over houses and other buildings after an attack," said Arnold Strong, a HitWizard working in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, "and that's all I can tell you."

However, another Ministry official, who wished to remain anonymous, continued to divulge that it was first seen a week ago, cast over the home of Wizengamot member Larissa Holmes of Elephant and Castle. She found only minimal destruction to her property and possessions, but the words "FRIENDS OF MUDBLOODS WILL SUFFER THE SAME FATE" were found burned into a wall of the family's sitting room. Fortunately, her husband and young daughter were visiting Diagon Alley at the time. Mrs. Holmes is a celebrated former professor of Muggle Studies at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and she has since made a name for herself by campaigning for more interaction with the Muggle community.

_Aurors who had arrived on the scene assumed that this was the work of Lord Voldemort, but there was no evidence. However, proof came last night after Aurors and HitWizards responded to a call of suspicious activity near the home Marcus Rookwood, an employee in the Department of Mysteries._

_Mr. Rookwood was not arrested or charged with anything, and regarding the "proof" that was found, the Ministry will not comment. However, joint research between the Auror office and Department of Mysteries, which began soon after the mark was first seen, has revealed a very Dark and extremely complex magical structure, although the exact incantation and wand movement remain unknown._

"_There is evidence to suggest that this charm was recently invented, and we believe that no one other than Voldemort or his Death Eaters can reproduce it," commented Edward Potter, Head Auror. "Therefore, if anyone witnesses another person cast this spell, we urge them to contact the Ministry immediately."_

_Ministry officials are also advising the community to be very cautious whenever the Dark Mark is seen. Do not enter any building over which it has been set, and contact their local HitWizard office as soon as possible._

Isabella folded the paper and set it aside, feeling slightly uneasy. Others around were just finishing up as well. James and Sirius in particular were looking annoyed. The news in the _Prophet_ lately did not seem to bother them much, as they claimed its sensational stories were only adding to everyone's fear. Usually Isabella agreed with them, especially regarding the article last week featuring stories of Inferi sightings that were never verified, but she thought this current article was very helpful.

"What a load of crap," James muttered, casting his paper aside and loading his plate with eggs and bacon.

"Rubbish?" Lily asked, looking appalled. "I think its actually a useful bit of information."

James set his knife and fork down and looked plainly at Lily. "Useful how? It says to avoid places where the mark is seen, but how much is that going to help? If that has been conjured, then the worse has already happened and those responsible will be long gone. The _Prophet_ makes it seem like Voldemort is going to be just around the corner, practicing it in full view. He and his followers are smart wizards, and if they are ever caught, it won't be because someone witnessed them casting this Dark Mark."

Lily glared at him and started to retort, but Sirius spoke over her.

"Well said, Prongs," he said genially. "Your outlook is darker these days; I like it."

Isabella frowned at him. She wondered if she would ever have a firm grasp on Sirius Black. His perspective and mood changed daily without warning; Isabella would begin to think he was a girl if it weren't for the very masculine reminders that crept their way into her dreams every other night. She felt her cheeks burn and then grew annoyed with herself for what seemed like the hundredth time since the late night encounter in the common room. She knew nearly nothing about Sirius and hated that she was so attracted to him.

"And," he continued, with a glance toward the Slytherin table, "now you're going to have a bunch of idiots thinking its cool to try to imitate it, along with neighbors spying on neighbors looking for evidence that won't be there. Constant articles like this only instill hysteria."

Lily rolled her eyes but remained quiet and began eating. Isabella was about to start on her own but a silver blur crashed into the table, sending food platters, drink jugs, and newspapers into the air and eliciting screams from all the girls. When the mess settled, a tiny light gray, almost silver owl was hopping and hooting happily on top of Isabella's plate of waffles.

"Bullet!" Isabella beamed. She patted the small owl on the head and untied the wet letter from its leg.

"Who is that from?" Keira asked as she gently stroked Bullet. A few of his feathers were sticking up in various directions.

"Lana and Jasmine," Isabella replied absentmindedly as she quickly looked over the letter in anticipation. "Poor thing though," she continued looking sadly at the owl, "it's such a long journey."

Isabella offered Lana's owl some water. "Head up to the Owlery and rest for a day or two," she whispered. "They won't mind." It clicked its beak and took off. She then excitedly turned her attention to the letter. She was surprised that it took them so long to reply to her last one.

_Bella!_

_Thanks for your last letter; it was very entertaining. Sorted by a hat? How silly. Anyways, we hope you're having a bit more fun now that you've started school, and we want every single last detail of what it's like—your classes, roommates, and of course, those lovely British gentlemen_.

_Gentlemen?_ Isabella thought. She looked up at the boys; Peter was making some rude gesture with his hand as he told a joke, and the three others howled with laughter. Isabella snorted and returned to her letter.

_We've been in school for almost two months now, and there is already so much to tell you since our last letter. First off, it's still not the same without you. No one has come to replace your space, and it being so far into the semester, we don't think anyone is going to. We do have a bit of bad news to report: Chris dumped Nina IN FRONT OF EVERYONE during our first weekend in Brentwood. She spent the next few days in bed crying her eyes out, skipping class and everything. She finally got over it for the most part about a week ago, but has been a total Debbie Downer and reminiscing about their relationship around us nonstop since then. Of course, we feel bad for the girl, but it's driving us nuts._

_And speaking of the weekend in Brentwood, we spoke to Garret. He approached us just as the boys were heading back to their castle and asked if we had heard anything from you. We told him that we had received a letter or two but that they had been sporadic and not too detailed because we were sure he hadn't been in contact with you, and we didn't want to make him feel even worse. He still looked really down and asked if we would pass along a 'hello.'_

_Isabella, what is going on? Why are you not returning his letters? We know the breakup was hard, but you ended as friends, and Garret is such a good guy; you know he doesn't deserve this. We can't tell you what to do, but please write to him, even if it's just a simple hello. There's no reason to lose such a close friend._

_In other good news, I, Lana, have a date with none other than Tate Gordon next Saturday; while Jasmine does not have any plans because, as always, she was too scared to approach Jake, even just to say 'hi.' _

_Hey! I was not scared; he just looked busy talking to his friends, and I didn't want to interrupt him._ Isabella laughed at Jasmine's scribbled interjection.

_Well seeing as how I can no longer write without fear of having my quill stolen out of my hands, I think it would be best to end here. Please write back ASAP; any distraction from Nina is greatly appreciated._

_Love and miss you,_

_Lana and Jasmine_

"Who's Garret?"

Isabella turned to her left as she refolded the letter. Jane was sitting next to her and been reading over her shoulder the entire time.

"Well, if you must know," Isabella began with an edge to her voice, setting her ruined plate aside and reaching for a clean one, "he is my ex-boyfriend."

"An ex-boyfriend?" asked Lily with wide eyes. "You never told us about an ex-boyfriend."

Isabella shrugged, trying to focus all of her attention back to her breakfast. "He just never came up."

"Because _you_ never brought him up," Keira said pointedly, but her mood changed quickly and with a grin asked, "What was he like?"

Isabella sighed as she placed her fork down, resigning to the fact that she was most likely not going to get a bite in. She was sure she saw the boys lean in closer and decided she wouldn't deprive their curious minds.

"Well, of course, he was tall, dark, and handsome," she began loftily as the girls huddled closer. "He was extremely courteous, had an amazing sense of humor, and was overall one of the best friends I have ever had."

"If he was so great, then why haven't you written to him?" Jane asked smartly.

Isabella remained silent; she had been asking herself the same question since Lana and Jasmine brought him up. She had not one single legitimate excuse as to why his letters remained unopened, and she began to feel incredibly guilty. They promised to stay friends after breaking up, but so far, Garret had been the only one to make the effort.

"I don't know," Isabella finally said. "I guess the fact that we had to breakup because of the move and not because we wanted to always hurt more. I really didn't know how to be friends because it just didn't make sense." She looked helplessly at the other girls. "If _that_ makes any sense."

Half an hour later, Isabella, Keira, and Jane were back in the common room, reveling in their open period. Lily had bid them goodbye at the marble staircase when Elias asked her to take a stroll around the grounds.

James, Remus, and Peter entered the common room shortly after them, greeted them quickly, and retreated to a dark corner near the fireplace.

"So are Lily and Elias secretly seeing each other or what?" Jane asked abruptly as she fixed her makeup.

"What's that?" Isabella said absentmindedly while retrieving some parchment and a quill from her schoolbag.

Keira looked at Jane as if she were crazy. "Um, I think Lily would tell us if they were dating."

Jane didn't look too convinced. "Well, it took her a while to tell us about Snape; she kept that secret for months; and besides, do you really think they're out strolling in this weather?"

This bit of information caught Isabella's attention, and she looked up before she could start her letter. "Lily and Snape dated?"

Jane nodded with a mischievous smile. "For years, off and on. They were friends before we started at Hogwarts, and he was obsessed with her, much like how James is…or _was_, if his new girlfriend is any indication."

"Oh, please," Keira scoffed. "James is only dating her to make Lily jealous."

"Afraid I have to disagree with you there, Keira," Jane said with a shake of her head. "If you haven't noticed, James hasn't paid much attention to Lily since around the first week of school, and the little bit of attention he has shown has only been to insult or belittle her, which he has _never_ done."

Keira bristled. "Well, forgetting about James for a second," she said, "the only reason she never told us about Snape was because she knew _exactly_ what we thought about him."

Isabella raised her eyebrows. "And that was?"

"That he was and still is a disgusting, worthless, and untrustworthy git," Keira spat.

"We always tried to warn her, but she is all about trying to see the good in someone," Jane said in a tone of disappointment. "And we were right, weren't we?"

"Unfortunately, she had to get hurt in the process, but she learned a lesson I guess," Keira recalled sadly. She then shook her head. "But Elias is different; he's an okay bloke, nothing like Snape."

"But she's been spending an awful lot of time with him _outside_ of Prefect duties," Jane said in a contrary tone.

Keira shrugged. "They always got along well since becoming Prefects last year, and his fancy for her was never a secret, so maybe he's laying it on a little more thickly now since James is otherwise occupied and the threat of him pummeling any of Lily's suitors has decreased."

Isabella laughed at this, but her mind was still consumed with the news about Lily and Snape. She had learned from Lily herself that they were close friends, but she didn't know that they had once dated, and to be honest, she couldn't understand it.

"Why did they breakup, Lily and Snape I mean?" Isabella asked.

"Uh, he fell in with the wrong crowd," Keira said with a significant look, and Isabella instantly understood. She sighed and began her letter.

_To my best friends,_

_First things first—Lana, don't use Bullet anymore to deliver overseas letters. He looked terrible when he arrived and was so tired, the poor little thing. Jasmine should turn you in for animal cruelty._

_Secondly, you guys are right; I have been avoiding Garret for more selfish reasons than anything else. I promise to send him a letter as soon as I read his and figure out how to repair this problem I caused. If you see him before that happens, please say 'hello' and assure him a letter is coming soon._

_Thirdly, Chris and Nina broke up? Wasn't there a time we all swore they were getting married? I wonder what their parents are thinking; that match was arranged since birth. I hope she feels better soon. I know what that feels like._

_And now onto what you so eloquently demanded—life at Hogwarts. What can I say? It certainly isn't Morgana, but it isn't all bad. My roommates are really a nice group of girls who are slowly becoming a close group of friends, but worry not; they could never replace you two._ Isabella knew that Jasmine, being the easily jealous and insecure type, would be happy to read that.

_Lily Evans, one of the girls I met earlier in Diagon Alley that I told you about, is wise, but a bit uptight. She's a prefect, so she has no patience for immature behavior, and she isn't afraid to speak her mind. Although, I am beginning to see that a lot of it is for show in front of other students. Behind closed doors, she has quite a silly sense of humor. All in all, I just think she needs to loosen up a bit._

_Keira Townsley, the other girl I met, has such an exuberant personality that I get tired just watching and listening to her. I don't understand how she has so much energy all of the time, but she is very fun to be around. And always making the time to gossip, she reminds me of you, Lana._

_I really don't know what to say about Jane Carroll. She hasn't quite warmed up to me, and I don't expect her to anytime soon. I think she believes I'm going to steal her friends or some other nonsense. She is definitely the dramatic type though; we get along alright._

_And then there is Mary Macdonald. She was like Nina—never around, always with her boyfriend. I really didn't know much about her. She recently suffered an accident at school and has been taken to the main hospital in London, so I don't know when she will be coming back._

_So now onto those 'lovely British gentlemen.'_

Isabella looked across the room. James, Remus, and Peter were sitting together grouped closely over a large piece of ratty looking parchment. It looked as though they were tracing lines on it, and every so often, Remus would tap it with his wand, causing it to glow blue for a second, and then they would continue. Sirius had not returned to the common room.

_Well, there is this group of boys, and I am not exactly sure whether I would consider them our friends so much, but they are in the same year, so we generally end up together somehow. They are a bunch of silly pranksters though, so things are always interesting when they're around._

_Remus is the nicest of them all; he seems the closest to being a gentlemen._

_Peter is a weird one. He comes off somewhat crude._

_In the beginning, James appeared to be the loud, always joking type, but that seems to have changed in just the past few weeks. Don't know much else about him, but I hear he's an exceptional Quidditch player. And he was right, my accent does make me stick out like a sore thumb, but the shock of an American at Hogwarts has began to fade amongst most people. _

_And rightfully so_, Isabella thought, _with a murderous wizard roaming the country._

_And then there's Sirius. He is…nice, I guess. We have a class together, but we really don't talk much._ This was true, but Isabella felt slightly guilty for leaving out the details of their late night chat that involved vodka, Sirius being half-naked, and a rather intimate conversation where she revealed fears to him, an acquaintance of couple of months, that she never shared with her friends of over ten years.

_Oh, and I almost forgot, the boys have another roommate. His name is Andy and that's about all I can tell you. He has a twin brother and cousin in the same year in a different house, so he is never around. Pretty good-looking though._

_And that's really it. I could go on forever about my classes, the food, all the slang I am slow to pick up, and this terrible group of students that consider my father and me 'blood traitors,' but this should suffice to hold you over. By the way, congrats Lana on the date with Tate. It's about damn time! I better get every little dirty detail too._

_Miss you both more than I can say. Write back soon._

_Love,_

_Bella_

Isabella quickly reread her note. Satisfied, she folded it and stood.

"Well, I'm off to the Owlery; I'll be back in a few," she said while stuffing the letter in an envelope. Keira and Jane muttered indistinctly without looking up; they both had their noses buried in the latest copy of _Witch Weekly._

"I CANNOT BELIEVE HIM!"

A piercing scream came from the direction of the portrait hole. Everyone in the room immediately turned towards the entrance, wondering what was going on.

"HOW DARE HE!" the voiced screamed again, and soon inquisitive minds were answered as Daphne Owens finally emerged, closely followed by two fifth year friends. What they were doing out of class was anyone's guess.

Daphne looked terrible. Her eyes were bloodshot and swollen, her cheeks were stained with tears, and her whole face was twisted with anger. Suddenly, she turned to her friends, and her mood changed dramatically.

"Am I not pretty enough?" Daphne whined. "That's it, isn't it? He doesn't find me attractive anymore. Well, you'd think I'd make up for it when we were alone, but I guess that doesn't do it for him anymore either."

Her friends seemed confused as to what they should say, and when they noticed all the students staring at them, they rushed Daphne away to the dormitories to save her from further embarrassment.

Isabella turned to Keira who shared her look of disbelief; Jane, however, looked simply satisfied.

A few minutes later, Isabella reached the Owlery in the West Tower. She had left the common room amid excited chatter about the breakup between Sirius and Daphne. It was mostly among girls, though; most of them were wondering who would be Sirius' next girlfriend, with a brazen few even claiming that he had been eying _them_ since the first day back.

She found Amelia after only a few minutes of searching. "Alright, now I know it's a long way, so take as long as you need," she instructed her owl while tying the letter to her leg. "Even rest up a bit before returning, okay?"

Isabella walked to the nearest window and raised her arm. Amelia nipped her ear affectionately, squeezed her talons slightly, and took off into the dreary weather. Though she didn't think Lily would keep anything from Keira and Jane, Jane was right about one thing: there was no way Lily and Elias were walking about the grounds in this weather.

Isabella watched Amelia disappear into the clouds, and then quickly set off for the common room. She had made the decision to finally read the bundle of unopened letters from Garret that sat at the bottom of her trunk. She wanted to read them without the fear of someone reading over her shoulder and knew this would be the best time to shut herself away with behind her bed hangings with Lily out with Elias and Keira and Jane engrossed in their gossip magazines.

"Not smart for a blood-traitor to be wandering the halls alone in these times," a familiar low voice said behind her, as she was about to reach the main staircase.

Isabella spun around and met the light blue eyes of Antonin Dolohov. He was approaching her slowly, flanked by Mulciber on one end and another student she did not know. He wore a menacing look that rooted her to the spot, causing her heartbeat to quicken and her hair to stand on end.

"It's amazing how rapidly your father has become a nuisance in his short time here," he continued, now so close that he was looking down at her. "You know, he searched my parents' home this past weekend for the second time, and of course, found nothing out of the ordinary. What does he think gives him the right to do that?"

"I'm sure he had a good reason to do so," Isabella said defiantly, though not as confidently as she had hoped. She knew the most recent search was because she had mentioned the last incident to her father in a previous letter. He was now twirling his wand in his fingers, making her extremely nervous.

Dolohov sneered. "Ah yes, that Gryffindor courage. Unfortunately, it only turns most of you into reckless idiots."

"Whatever you may think of me or my father, he has the might of the Ministry behind him, and he will search wherever and whoever he feels necessary," Isabella said as she glared at him before turning around and hastily walking away, hoping that simple taunting was their only reason for stopping her. She was sure that they wouldn't hex her when there were classrooms full of students on both sides of them.

"That's right, you little bitch. Turn and run," she heard him call after her. "But you won't be able to run forever. You'll one day meet the same fate as your worthless mother."

Isabella froze. She closed her eyes as images of her mother flooded her mind. None of his words made any sense, but stinging tears welled up as Dolohov began to maliciously play his advantage.

"Oh, that's right. You probably don't know how she died, huh?" Isabella heard him say from behind her. He was soon so close that she felt his hot breath on the back of her neck.

"Well, _I_ heard that she _begged_ for her life, like a pathetic coward," Dolohov snarled. "And let me guess, your father moved you both here hoping to fight the Dark Lord in her memory?" He lowered his voice to almost a whisper. "Too bad he'll only meet the same fate."

"Hey! Don't you have anything better to do than harassing people in corridors?"

Isabella eyes snapped open. Her built up tears streamed down her cheeks, and the blurred figure of Sirius slowly came into view. He was walking towards them looking murderous with his wand at the ready. When he reached them, he grabbed Isabella's arm and gently pulled her behind him.

Dolohov did not seemed bothered by Sirius' threat in the least. Rather, he looked positively delighted.

"How precious," he began, looking between the two of them, "one blood-traitor saving another." The two boys behind him laughed callously.

"Your fight is with me. Leave her out of it," Sirius demanded.

"No, I don't think I will. With her father butting his head in everywhere, she's just as low as you are. You both better watch your back." And to Isabella's surprise, he shot them one last look of the utmost contempt, turned around, and began to walk away. She released the breath she was holding, silently thanking Merlin that it had not turned into a duel.

"Too bad you couldn't give your brother the same advice," Sirius called to his retreating back. Isabella groaned, wondering why Sirius had to provoke him. "_I_ heard—"

Isabella screamed as Dolohov whipped around and yelled "_Confringo_!" but it was drowned out by the bell signaling the end of the lesson and students pouring into the hall around them.

Sirius' quick shield charm dissipated as he turned back around to face Isabella.

"You okay?"

"Yes, fine."

She avoided his eyes as she tried to wipe her cheeks and fix her flustered appearance. He reached out to grab her arm but Isabella back away jerkily.

"Thanks," she muttered and rushed past him. She felt horrible for leaving him there but didn't want any more humiliation. Besides, there were more pressing issues to deal with, and she took off for the common room at full speed, knocking into students along the way and ignoring Sirius when he called her name from behind her.

She reached the portrait hole out of breath, and the Fat Lady, sensing her urgency, swung open quickly as soon as she said, "Acromantula!"

"Isabella!" Keira exclaimed as she came rushing toward them. "What's the matter; what's going—" Isabella cut her off with a raised hand and shake of her head.

"How do we contact people outside the school in an emergency?" Isabella asked in a rush. She could feel the others students in the room watching her.

"Oh! Um, students can use the, um, school owls," Keira babbled, obviously flustered at Isabella's distressed state. The latter turned to Jane with agitation, looking expectant.

"Floo network," Jane answered promptly. "All the Heads of House have fires connected to the network in their studies."

"Thanks," Isabella said and took off across the common room and through the portrait hole again.

Isabella continued to race through the corridors and down the stairs toward the first floor. She was due in Arithmancy in five minutes but did not care. Besides, Sirius was the last person she wanted to spend a double period with right now.

She finally reached McGonagall's study door, rushing inside before thinking to knock. Seeing the professor's guest made her regret her lack of courtesy instantly.

"Headmaster, Professor McGonagall," Isabella panted, stopping short just past the door, "I am so sorry for barging in, it's just that—"

"It's quite alright, Miss Williams," Dumbledore said calmly. He was standing over McGonagall, who was sitting at her desk, and looking at papers over her shoulder. He straightened and walked toward Isabella, while McGonagall cleared her desk with a wave of her hand.

"How can we help you?" Dumbledore asked, his eyes twinkling.

"I need to speak to my father," Isabella said in a quiet voice, still feeling stupid for barging in on an obviously important meeting.

Professor McGonagall's eyes went wide. "Your father? Is everything okay? We usually don't let students use the Floo unless it's a genuine emergency."

"Yes, I realize that, Professor," Isabella replied as nicely as she could; she didn't want to sound at all patronizing after her rudeness. "But it's really important that I speak to him as soon as possible; that is if I am not interrupting anything important."

McGonagall's mouth opened, but before she could deny the request, as Isabella was sure she was going to do, Dumbledore spoke over her.

"Of course, Miss Williams," he said with a smile, "I am sure Derrick would love to hear from you. I am due for a meeting at the Ministry and am late as it is." He turned to McGonagall. "We can continue our chat later on this evening after I return."

McGonagall gave a curt nod. "Yes, Albus."

Dumbledore bowed to both women and exited the study without another word.

McGonagall stepped back and swept her arm toward the fireplace. "As you please, Miss Williams."

"Thank you, Professor."

Isabella hurried over and grabbed a handful of Floo powder. She thought where her father would be for a moment before throwing it in and saying, "Office of Derrick Williams, Ministry of Magic."

She kneeled gently and put her head into the flames. After a few seconds watching unknown rooms rush by, her father's office, which she had been to only once, materialized before her.

Derrick was sitting at the large desk, reclining in his chair with his feet resting on the edge. He was reading through a long report, grunting in irritation and scribbling things out at various intervals.

"Dad?" Isabella called quietly, not wanting to startle him.

"Isabella?" Derrick responded, looking around the room in confusion. His eyes finally found the fire and he gasped. He set down the report and rushed over, sitting in the chair closest to the fire and leaning in toward her. It was then Isabella noticed the shiny burn marks on his arms.

"Are you okay? What's going on?" he asked urgently. "I thought parents could only contact their children using the Floo in an emergency."

"Correct. This isn't an emergency per se, but I really needed to talk to you."

"About...?"

"About mom."

Derrick didn't say anything and gave her an inquisitive look.

"About her death," Isabella said in a small voice. Derrick's jaw clenched and relaxed in less than a second, and she immediately felt horrible and selfish for bringing it up, but she knew her mind wouldn't let her rest until she knew the truth.

"What about it?" Derrick asked in a slightly tight voice.

"Was it really an accident?"

Her father's eyes widened with surprise. It was obviously the last thing he was expecting to hear. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, I was attacked just now by some—"

"YOU WERE ATTACKED?"

Isabella jumped at her father's gruff voice before her and McGonagall's shrill voice from behind. She pulled out the fire to see the professor standing at her desk, nostrils flaring, looking furious; Isabella had forgotten she was still in the room.

"Not really attacked," Isabella retracted, feeling imprudent for using such an extreme word with the people who would take it most seriously. "More like confronted."

"By whom?" demanded McGonagall.

"Dolohov."

McGonagall nodded and made a note on a scrap piece of paper on her desk. Isabella leaned back into the fire to see her father back at his desk doing the same.

"Dolohov again? What does he have to do with your question?" Derrick asked, still writing.

Isabella took a deep breath. "He said how he had heard about her death—that she had begged for her life." She felt her throat constrict at the end.

Derrick looked up from his desk and stared at his daughter for a moment before heading back to the fireplace. This time he knelt before her, and Isabella was able to get a good look at him for the first time in nearly two months.

He looked tried, very tired. The tiny lines around his eyes were now more prominent, and there were grey hairs on his crown that had not been there. She tried to swallow her guilt and continue on.

"He made it sound like it was...murder," Isabella was now whispering. "Not the accident you described to me. Which—which is true?"

Derrick closed his eyes and lowered his head. A few quiet seconds passed before he looked back up again, and Isabella saw that his eyes were slightly glimmering.

"At the time of your mother's death," Derrick said in a soft voice, "not much was known about Voldemort, especially over in the States. Only a few top officials, including myself, had been briefed by Britain, who had warned us that he could begin to gain support in the States, though most likely not.

"When your mother decided to visit her Aunt Joanna, who as you know was very ill at the time, I worried for her, but only minimally. Afterall, your mother's family is pureblood, and although her closest relatives are not elitists, a few older generations support the idea of a pureblood Wizarding community; maybe not willing to go out there and kill for it, but it wouldn't be too surprising if they were approached by Voldemort's supporters."

"And they were?" Isabella asked breathlessly.

"Not until your mother arrived." Derrick stood and began pacing the room, rubbing his temples in exhaustion. "You know that Estelle was a very talented Healer, world-renowned for her work in potions, antidotes and replenishing potions in particular. Most of the stuff she improved and invented were for medical purposes, but what you didn't know was that she was asked to research a few things for the Auror office—universal antidotes that would work against any poison and, most importantly, a potion that when consumed would act like an internal shield, protecting the individual from numerous hexes and curses.

"The potion was expected to protect against only mild to moderate jinxes, but about a month before your mother left for her trip, she achieved something completely unanticipated—the potion worked against the Imperius curse. It worked for only a short time the Imperius curse is considered the most minor of the Unforgivables, but it was still a significant achievement nonetheless because it opened the door for progress toward developing protection against the other two. All of this research, for obvious reasons, was kept secret and known to only the highest officials. Such an invention would be invaluable to an Auror or HitWizard force and dangerous if it fell into the wrong hands."

Derrick stopped pacing and looked directly at Isabella. "Do you see where I am going with this?"

Isabella hesitated before nodding. Her knees where aching terribly, but she needed to hear the rest; she needed to hear it from her father and not the distorted version from some Slytherin jerk.

"Voldemort found out about it?" Isabella asked in a shaking voice.

"Yes, exactly how and when is being investigated both here and back at home, but he did. For someone beginning to organize for what is expected to be an all out war, this potion would be priceless to both himself and his followers.

"Your mother's trip was not a secret, as no one believed she was in any danger. Voldemort went alone to Aunt Joanna's home the third night after your mother arrived. In exchange for the exclusive use of her knowledge and talent, he offered her a spot as his closest associate, promising her power would be second only to his once they took over the Ministry. He was not expecting a fight or any other resistance as he assumed your mother would willfully consent considering her family, but anyone who knew your mother well knew she never believed in pureblood elitism. So of course, she refused."

"And so he killed her?" Isabella whispered, tears now springing to her eyes.

Derrick shook his head. "No...not yet at least. Voldemort's need for the experimental potions was greater than his sadistic need to kill to prove a point. He tried to convince her of his vision and that there was no way to avoid the inevitable cleansing of the Wizarding community. When he finally realized that no amount of lecture or argument was going to change her mind, he took her hostage, and that is when he contacted the Branch.

"For four days he and the Death Eaters tortured her in an attempt to coerce her into submission, and in the mean time, Voldemort tried to bargain with us: her life in exchange for her research documents. He had sent one of those two-way mirrors so we had a direct link. I saw every second of it." Derrick's voice broke toward the end, and he turned away from Isabella. After a few deep breaths, he faced her again and continued.

"It was a matter of national Wizarding security, but no other official had the audacity to sit there and tell me how we should proceed with _my _wife, so the decision fell on me. Of course, my initial reaction was to just hand over the damn papers, but I knew better. The Muggles deal with these sort of people all the time; we knew that the moment we gave in, Estelle would be killed. So, while my team tried to stall in bargaining with him from the States, I went to Britain with a couple of my top Aurors, and we set out to find Voldemort. We knew the only way to save her now was to search for and physically rescue her.

"But it was difficult, a lot more so than I was expecting. Like I said, not much was known about Voldemort except within his inner circle and a few trusted families, and no one was willing to talk. On top of that, we were unable to get support from outlets like the _Daily Prophet_ due to pressure from the Ministry."

"But why?" Isabella demanded angrily.

Derrick shrugged irritably. "Because this sort of thing does not happen within our community—the kidnappings, torturing, killings on such a large scale. This is rampant among Muggles, but not us. Sure, there have been Dark wizards before, but they were stamped out before they could do any terrible damage. Voldemort is a lot more influential, powerful, and dangerous than any other Dark wizard since Salazar Slytherin himself. No government is going admit to their people that someone like Voldemort exists and is planning a war until it absolutely has to, especially when Voldemort is supported by a number of the community's most affluent citizens. And your mother apparently was not reason enough."

Isabella felt her blood boiling. "But that's—"

"Politics," Derrick cut across sternly, anticipating her outrage. "It's a dirty game, but that's the way it is played."

"So then what?" Isabella asked in a biting tone.

"We were at a loss, and your mother had...had come to terms with her fate. She did try to negotiate at the beginning—telling Voldemort that while she would not give him any information, she would stop her research immediately so that no side could benefit from it, but of course that did not work. And by that time, Voldemort had found out we were searching for him; he had and still has spies within the Ministry. He grew tired with our stalling and the whole situation in general, and I guess your mother's potions were not worth any more wasted time. He killed her, personally."

Isabella dropped her head and let the welled tears fall silently. When she looked up, Derrick was standing back at the desk, gripping the edges and looking away from her.

"And all this happened while I was in school and nobody bothered to tell me?" Isabella asked in a stiff voice after a long silence. As her father's story progressed, she had found herself growing angrier with him by the second, and she couldn't decide what infuriated her the most: the fact that he had flown off to Britain to what could have easily been his own death without informing her of anything that was happening, the fact that he had kept the actual story of her mother's death a secret for well over six months, or the fact that he had dedicated himself to the very Ministry who had not given a damn whether her mother lived or died only months ago.

Derrick looked toward Isabella again and slowly walked over. She knew he had recognized her heated tone. After resuming his seat in the closest armchair, he finally spoke.

"Yes, and I had good reason to keep it from you. You were only fifteen years old at the time."

"But you could have very well been killed yourself!" Isabella cried. "And then what? Both of my parents would have been dead and I wouldn't have the faintest idea as to why."

"I know that! Looking back, it was a very bad idea to leave without telling you, but there is no point to get mad about it now."

"Fine!" Isabella yelled, still fuming. She really hated shouting at her father like this, but she was upset and needed to get her point across. "What about mom? Why did you not tell me the truth from the beginning?"

Derrick looked at her in disbelief. "It was already difficult enough telling you your mother was dead in the first place. I was not about the go into detail about her abduction and torture," he replied in a hard voice, but his eyes were pleading.

"But I deserved to know the truth!" Isabella sobbed. Knowing the real story made her realize how much more dangerous her and Derrick's situation actually was. Voldemort specifically went after her mother, which meant so much more than just an accidental run-in with Death Eaters. Who is to say that he wouldn't now go after her or her father?

"I know, Isabella. I know," Derrick sighed. "But when was I supposed to tell you? Most certainly not at the beginning and not when the move became permanent." He paused for a moment. "Probably the best time was when I first told you completely about Voldemort right after arriving here…I just didn't see the point of it at the time. You had already gone through enough saying goodbye to your friends and…Garret."

Isabella felt herself blush despite her anger. "So you thought it better I learn from some idiot here?"

"Of course not!" Derrick said with exasperation, throwing his hands in the air. "I had no idea that students there had already been that adversely influenced by their families."

Isabella huffed indignantly, crossed her arms, and looked away. Tears were still streaming down her face.

"You're still upset about something," Derrick said after a moment of silence.

"How could you work for this place?" Isabella asked in a hurt voice, her eyes roaming around his office. "They did nothing to help you find mom, and then think it's okay to ask for your help when this Voldemort situation gets inconvenient and frightening for _them_. And _you_ accept the position and uproot our lives like everything is fine and dandy."

"You have no idea the internal struggle I endured when approached about the position," Derrick said darkly. His face had gone hard.

"Of course not," Isabella said tartly. "Why would I think it would be complicated for you? After all, mom's death was only an accident."

Derrick sighed. "Isabella," he pleaded and she felt her resolve soften just a little. "You will learn that there are times when you have to put grudges aside and work together—for the common good. It was difficult at the very beginning, believe me, to even listen to what Minister Stotch was offering. But eventually, as I thought about it more, I realized that it was the best thing for me to do, to preserve your mother's memory. What would be gained by me sitting around, consumed with rage and bitterness, when I knew I could help others from experiencing the same fate?

"It took a lot to put the experience behind me—and I don't mean forgetting about Estelle," Derrick quickly added, seeing Isabella heat up and open her mouth. "I know exactly who and what I am fighting for, and I will never forget what happened and what could have been done. My colleagues here know that, but we are not going to waste our time exchanging apologies and false pleasantries. There is just too much at stake."

He finished in a soft voice, looking at Isabella insistently as if begging her to understand. She remained silent, running everything she had just heard through her mind, knowing her father had only the best intentions, but she was still upset by it all. She was feeling slightly betrayed and very disoriented, the same way she had felt when her father unexpectedly showed up at Morgana and she was pulled out of class that fateful day. She was now being forced to relive that day, which she thought was so unfair, considering how long and draining the time afterwards had been. She didn't want to go through that healing process again.

"Isabella? Are you—"

"I have to get to class," she lied, stony-faced. She was significantly late for Arithmancy, true, but she had no intention of going.

"Oh, okay, dear," Derrick said, looking deflated. "I know it's a lot to take it, and I sincerely apologize that you had to learn it this way. Just please don't feel like you can't trust me or can't come to me with any questions you may have. We can't afford to let this divide us; we are all each other has got."

Isabella nodded stiffly. "Bye, Dad," she said and stood slowly, her knees throbbing. She had already forgiven her father, that was not a question, but it was going to take a while for it to sink in, and he was the last person she wanted to see or talk to right now.

"_Finite_," Isabella said, pointing her wand at the fire, and the green flames burned orange and yellow again. She turned to see McGonagall sitting at her desk gazing at her with a pitying look, her face whiter than usual, shamelessly indicating she had continued to listen.

"Are you alright, Miss Williams?"

"Yes, Professor," Isabella lied again, her voice tightening. She then shook her head. "No, actually I am not. May I be excused from classes for the rest of the day?"

McGonagall thought for a second, looking unsure, but then nodded. "Of course."

"Thank you."

Isabella headed out the study and into the empty corridor. She began walking toward the common room, hoping against hope that Keira and Jane had not waited for her to return so that she could shut herself behind her bed curtains without question and forget the world around her.


	7. Lose My Breath

Lily was annoyed for a number of reasons.

The first concerned a letter she received this morning from her mother, which told the story of Petunia's recent engagement to Vernon Dursley. The wedding was to take place over the Christmas holiday, and Lily was expected to attend. Lily couldn't think of a worse way to spend her much-needed break, but she was relieved that her parents didn't expect them to present a false sisterly relationship—she wasn't asked to be part of the wedding party after all.

Secondly, she didn't know what to do about Isabella. The newcomer had completely closed herself off to all of them over the past week, and no one knew why; though Keira had relayed to her Isabella's frantic questions about emergency contact and subsequent dash to McGonagall's office.

Lily prided herself on being a compassionate and welcoming friend, but the situation with Isabella was different. They had only known her for a short while, and Lily or Keira did not know how exactly to approach her. Although it had frustrated her to no end, Keira had assured Lily that Isabella eventually would open up to them, or at the very least, get over it on her own.

The third was the fact that Elias was thirty minutes late in meeting her in the library, where she was currently sitting alone waiting for him. She usually would not be so irritated, but Potter and his flavor of the week were sitting a few tables away being sickeningly distracting.

Okay…even Lily had to admit that was a bit of an exaggeration, but they were still distracting.

Lily was almost floored when she saw Potter walk into the library with a girl she barely recognized. Despite Keira's insistence over the past few weeks, Lily still had a hard time believing that girl was Delilah Peterson, who had apparently been hit by puberty like a ton of bricks over the summer. On top of that, Potter _never_ studied in the library, not even for O.W.L.s, so Lily was convinced that they were here solely because he knew she would be here and wanted to flaunt his new fling in front of her, as he had done countless times before.

Except this time, it was different. For one thing, Potter and Delilah were not being overly affectionate. Indeed, they were sitting close to each other on the same side of the table, their backs to Lily, and holding hands underneath. Potter would sometimes release her hand and move his arm up to lie across her shoulders, pulling her close every once in a while to whisper something in her ear. And still at other times, they would keep to themselves, focusing on whatever work lay before them.

Overall, though, it really didn't matter, because Lily was certain Potter hadn't seen her upon reaching their table, so he had no idea she was even there, and this made her feel somewhat embarrassed and egocentric.

_But it wasn't too far-fetched of an idea, _Lily thought defensively as she opened _Advanced Potion Making_ and began her essay on the Draught of Living Death, and she knew she was right.

Even as she tried to defend her conceitedness, she couldn't help but let her mind brood over her and Potter's interaction over the past few years.

Over third year, Potter's childish behavior—pulling her hair, shooting spitballs at her, etc.—slowly transformed into constant attempts at flirting, countless date offerings, and other unreserved forms of attention-seeking.

And although Lily would never admit it to anyone—she could hardly admit it to herself—a _very_ small part of her had always been slightly flattered by it all. Potter was, after all, one of the most desired guys in school, and he had spent the better part of the last three years trying to win _her_ affection. Not that she needed his validation, but Lily, like most girls her age who weren't Mary Macdonald or Thalia Crake of Ravenclaw, got a little insecure from time to time, and Potter's attention was encouraging.

That small feeling of appreciation, however, had always been trumped by Potter's overbearing arrogance and Severus' endless ridicule, resulting in her constant rebuffs.

Things were different now, though.

More or less since school began, Potter's attitude towards Lily had gone from one extreme to the other, now settling somewhere in the middle with civil indifference since that night in the common room. This was what she had been wanting for so long, but for whatever reason, it didn't feel right.

"Hey, Lily."

Lily started at the sound of her name and turned to see Elias coming toward her from the stacks, a couple of books in his hands already. She smiled warmly and all thoughts of Potter left her mind immediately.

"Sorry I'm late," he said, dropping the books on the table and taking the seat across from her, conveniently blocking Potter and Delilah.

"Quidditch practice run late I take it?"

Elias grinned playfully at her. "How'd you guess?"

Lily felt her insides flutter, just as they did every time he smiled at her.

"I don't know, but I think it has something to do with the team captain," Lily said. "I hear he's a great, mean prat."

"Oh really, is that what they say about him?" Elias asked with a raised eyebrow. "I didn't think you were interested in kissing 'great, mean prats.'"

Lily's cheeks burned. "It's not so bad," she said shyly.

"'Not so bad,' that's all I get?" He looked thoughtful for a second. "I guess I'm going to have to try harder next time," he said with a wink.

"I look forward to it," Lily said barely above a whisper, her face still feeling hot.

"Sorry, didn't catch that?" he said with a smirk.

Lily rolled her eyes but grinned. "I said 'I look forward to it.'"

Elias leaned in close to her, and Lily's breath hitched. "You know, we can cut our studying short and get out of here."

"I have to finish this, sorry," Lily said with a sad sigh, gesturing to her essay. "You can wait, can't you?"

Elias laughed and shook his head, earning him a shush from a harassed-looking Madam Grimes, who happened to be patrolling the aisles near them. He shrugged and grinned at Lily.

She pursed her lips, trying not to smile, and went back to her essay.

_Flirting with Elias is so much more enjoyable than trying to flirt with Severus was,_ Lily mused as she began flipping through her textbook. In fact, _everything _was more enjoyable with Elias than it ever was with her ex-boyfriend, and Lily wondered why she ever considered that relationship something worth fighting for.

Lily had always brushed off Elias' reserved yet persistent flirting throughout their fifth year because of her ties to Severus, but it had been difficult to ignore his good looks. Lily slyly glanced up at him now and pursed her lips again.

Elias was tall and well filled out, with broad shoulders, tan skin, dark blue eyes, and copper brown hair. He had a square face with a strong jaw that was usually covered with stubble, Lily's favorite feature because it gave him a rugged look. Lily knew he would have easily been as popular as Potter, Black, or Charlie Davies, but girls didn't pay him much attention because he wasn't an arrogant showoff, a shameless pretty boy, or a smarmy git, respectively. He was the strong and silent type, which suited Lily just fine.

But there was one more reason why Lily had found herself growing closer to Elias over the past few weeks. Like her, he was Muggle-born, and despite what Isabella said about them all being in danger, her situation, and all Muggle-borns in the Wizarding community for that matter, was different.

Pureblood traitors could eventually be convinced to defect to the Dark side and all past grievances would be forgiven because, well, they were purebloods. Muggle-borns weren't wanted either way, and Elias understood this better than her roommates ever could.

Lily chanced another look at him and watched as he worked feverishly at his Ancient Runes work, the main subject he particularly excelled in along with Arithmancy. Lily discovered that he was better at the more technical subjects, the ones where direct problem-solution patterns were featured, which made him fit so well as a Quidditch captain.

"I can tell you're staring at me," Elias said grinning, without looking up. Lily felt her cheeks burn once more.

"It's just fascinating watching you work on that stuff," she said sheepishly. "I was never good at Ancient Runes."

"And I don't get your interest in Potions," Elias said, gesturing at her nearly completed essay. "Potions has too many variables and too much potential for mistake where one could easily get lost in it, trying to improve this and intensify that. Not saying it's a bad thing, but you already have double what Slughorn asked for, and I am sure you would continue if I didn't ask if you were ready to leave."

"You're finished?"

Elias nodded. "And I know you're not, but would you be able to turn that last paragraph into a conclusion?"

"Give me a minute," Lily said and went back to her essay, silently chastising herself for appearing so anxious. She didn't know what Elias had done to her to make her cut her work short or become a bit lax about her Prefect duties lately, but she assumed it had something to do with the fact that Severus never made her feel as _wanted_ as Elias does now, and she and Elias weren't even dating.

_Yet_, Lily thought with a small smile.

"Done."

"Great," Elias replied, shoving his books into his bag and grabbing her stack.

A few minutes later, they were exiting the library, not hand in hand, but still very close.

After fifteen minutes of chatting and walking aimlessly throughout the corridors, Lily realized they were on course for the abandoned classroom on the fourth floor and had to bite her lip to keep from grinning like a Cheshire cat.

They were soon on the classroom's balcony admiring the view of the grounds below. Lily was standing against the balustrade with her back against Elias, who had his arms wrapped around her, keeping her warm. It had been raining all day and the clouds had just begun to break up, revealing a nearly full moon that shone brightly upon the dark lake.

"Hey, so I had a question," Elias said, his breath warm against her ear.

"Okay," Lily replied, trying to keep her voice even.

"About the Hogsmeade trip at the end of the month."

"Yes?" Lily squeaked, her heart hammering against her chest.

"Do you really think we will have to baby-sit the third years?"

Lily frowned and elbowed him sharply in the stomach.

"Hey!" he said indignantly, but he was laughing. He suddenly spun her around so she was now facing him.

"You deserved it," she said, pouting slightly.

"I really do want to know if you think we'll have to," Elias said, now smirking, "because if so, it would really interfere with the date I have planned for us."

Lily grinned. "So are you asking me to Hogsmeade?"

"I guess I am. Do you want to go with me?"

"Maybe," Lily said, shrugging. "I might need some convincing."

"You little—"

But he was cut off when Lily covered his lips with her own. Elias, caught by surprise, hesitated for a second before settling into the kiss and bringing his hands up to tangle in her hair. Only recently did Lily start wearing it down more often, when Elias made a quiet comment about liking it that way.

Lily brought her own hands up around his neck and had to keep herself from moaning when Elias deepened the kiss, reveling in the tingling sensation that shot through her body whenever their tongues touched.

In the back of her mind, Lily thought she might have heard footsteps coming from the classroom, but she immediately let the thought go as Elias' hands moved down to her lower back and waist, knowing what would come next. She broke the kiss and gently shoved away from him, already giggling.

"No tickling," she laughed, panting a little.

"Sorry," Elias said guiltily, raising his hands. "They kind of have a mind of their own."

"I bet," Lily muttered. She shook her head and smiled, trying to cool herself down. "Now, can we try again?"

"With pleasure," Elias grinned, pulling her close to him and kissing her forcefully.

Lily sighed into him and let her hands roam down his back under his robes. Her body was heating up again, and she didn't understand how she could be so turned on by just kissing. Going slow with Elias, if they ever became a couple, was going to pose some difficult challenges.

"I thought you said this room was always empty, Avery."

Lily's eyes shot open, and she pushed away from Elias just as he made to part her lips. She looked to the archway between the room and balcony, and the sight made her blood turn cold and her stomach drop to settle somewhere near her feet.

Standing there was Avery, a seventh year Slytherin she knew as Rebastan Lestrange, and Severus. To anyone else, Severus would have looked impassive, but Lily recognized the set jaw and anger burning behind his eyes. She knew him too well.

"It usually is," Avery said, and Lily identified a bit of apprehension in his voice. "I wouldn't have suggested it had I known it was snogging grounds for Mudblood knobs and their slags."

Lily thought she saw Severus glare at Avery, but she couldn't be sure.

"Watch your damn mouth," Elias almost growled, taking a step forward with his wand already in his hand, "or I'll give you worse than what Potter and Black did a few weeks ago."

Avery sneered. "Are you threatening me? Do you know who I am, what I could have done to you?"

"I know exactly who you are," Elias countered. "You're Michael Avery, the only person who couldn't produce a silent shield charm in Defense Against the Dark Arts today and one of seven Slytherin Quidditch players who will get their asses handed to them this Saturday."

The color drained from Avery's face. "You fucking little..." he mumbled as he grabbed his wand and took a step forward. Lestrange held his arm out to stop him.

"Avery," he snapped in a low voice, "get a hold of yourself. You know what we were told: tread lightly and keep our heads down right now." He then looked up at Lily and Elias and smirked. "This obviously wasn't the best choice for privacy, for us at least. We will leave you two lovebirds to your business."

"Don't bother," Lily said, feeling a mixture of anger and humiliation. She then turned to Elias. "Let's go."

Elias nodded curtly and grabbed her hand, catching Lily by surprise for only a second before she tightened her hold. The Slytherins parted to let them pass, and she was slightly shocked that they let them do so unharmed.

Elias grabbed their bags from the desk they had dumped them on, and they were almost out the door before she heard Avery say, "You almost had us convinced about her, Snape. Who knew she'd end up running to some lame Hufflepuff. At least you got what you wanted out of her, eh?" He snickered maliciously.

Lily's face burned, and she turned back to face them. Severus was looking right at her, the anger in his eyes replaced with spite and a slight smirk at his lips. Lily instantly felt hot tears spring to her eyes and her throat constrict. She swiftly turned away from him and followed Elias out of the classroom.

They walked toward the main staircase in silence for a few minutes until Elias spoke.

"What do you think they are up to? Nothing good, I imagine. Lousy idiots," he spat, shaking his head. "Do you think we should report them to McGonagall?"

Lily didn't respond, afraid that it would only be a sob. She hated that Severus was still able to affect her like this despite everything they had gone through. Even more, she couldn't believe that he would expose their most intimate moments, especially to his Slytherin 'friends,' who he had long derided for being impressionable, delusional, and meek. It was easy for Lily to see now that Severus had fully become one of them.

"Is everything okay, Lily?"

"Hmm?" Lily asked, abruptly realizing that Elias had stopped and was staring at her with concern. "Oh! Sorry, I was just thinking."

Elias smiled. "Of course you were. You're not afraid of _them_, are you?"

Lily shook her head quickly. "No, of course not," she said truthfully. "It just angers me to no end, how they think they can go around intimidating everyone else without consequence."

"Don't let them bother you so much," Elias said soothingly. "They will get theirs one of these days, trust me. Besides, I don't like you being so worked up." He raised his hand and smoothed the wrinkle between her furrowed brows with his thumb. His hand felt cool against her skin, and her whole body relaxed at his light touch.

"Much better," Elias said softly before dropping his hand. "Shall we head back? It must nearly be curfew."

"Yeah, and I should try to turn in early," she said, yawning as if on cue. "I have a long day tomorrow."

"Yeah, and it's because of _extra_ Potions," Elias said derisively, and Lily punched him in the arm.

"Have you ever thought about putting those violent tendencies to good use, say as part of your Quidditch team?"

"I'm dreadful on a broom," Lily admitted sheepishly.

"Finally! Something useful _I_ can teach _you_!" Elias almost shouted with glee, and Lily laughed at his giddy nature, although she had no plans on holding him to this. She was hoping to avoid all possible embarrassing situations while with Elias, and she on a broom was definitely one of them.

A few minutes later, they had reached the Fat Lady. A few other sixth and seventh years were also just getting to the common room, including Remus and Sirius, who gave Elias an indifferent look and cold stare, respectively.

"Looks like I've strayed too far into enemy territory," Elias said, and Lily noticed the hint of anxiety beneath his coolness.

"Don't worry about _them_," Lily replied, pulling Elias past the portrait, continuing down the corridor, and rounding a corner for more privacy. When she turned to face him, he was smiling suggestively.

"Aren't you being a little forward? We haven't even been on a single date," Elias asked reproachfully, but he was already pulling her towards him.

Within seconds, Lily was losing her head again as Elias' hands went roaming once more. It wasn't until she felt heat pooling in her center that she suddenly pulled away from the kiss; she wasn't ready for that reaction yet.

"Sorry," Elias said hastily.

Lily shook her head. "No, you did nothing wrong," Lily assured him. "Maybe we should just turn-in."

"I think that is a good idea," Elias said with a mixture of relief and regret. "I'll walk you back."

When they reached the Fat Lay again, Elias gave her a quick peck on the cheek. "Goodnight, Lily. I'll see you in Potions."

"Goodnight, Elias."

Lily watched him go until he turned the corner and was out of sight. She ran her fingers through her hair to remove the evidence of Elias' fervor, and then pressed her hands to her face, hoping to cool down the flush in her cheeks.

"Try as you might," the Fat Lady said disapprovingly, "but anyone will be able to tell you've just had a good snog."

"Acromantula," Lily said in a bored voice, "and mind your own."

The Fat Lady clucked her tongue and bristled, but swung open without another word. Lily made her way through the portrait hole and was slightly annoyed to find the common room still full of people. She thought about just heading straight to the dormitory, but she knew she wouldn't get away with ignoring Keira, who was now waving frantically from near the fire.

She made her way over and saw that Keira was with Isabella and Jane, both working on homework. She looked at Isabella pointedly and then raised her eyebrows in question at Keira. The latter shook her head sadly, and Lily frowned. Keira shrugged and gave her a look that said, "Give her some time."

"Hey, girls," Lily greeted once she finally reached them. Jane glanced up and smiled, and Isabella raised a hand without looking up.

"Joining us?" Keira asked.

"No, I'm pretty much caught up," Lily said. "I was able to get most of it done in the library."

"You were there with Elias, right?" Jane asked sweetly, but Lily knew something was up with the warning look Keira gave her.

"I was," Lily said, matching Jane's tone and expecting a barrage of questions, but they never came. Instead, Jane continued with her homework, but Lily saw a look of satisfaction on her face.

"You two are getting along well," Keira said.

"We are."

There was a pause, and Lily looked around the common room, avoiding Keira's eyes. "Well, goodnight," she finally said without looking at any of them and all but fled up the staircase.

Once safe in the dormitory, Lily threw her bag on her bed, grabbed her bathrobe, and headed for the bathroom, feeling slightly guilty. She wasn't really keeping anything major from them, for as close as she was with Keira and Jane, they didn't always talk about their snogging partners—not right away at least. After all, it was just kissing.

_They'll find out about our Hogsmeade date soon,_ Lily thought as she grabbed her shower supplies from her cubby in the bathroom and turned on the water.

_But until then, it will be our little secret_. Lily smiled, touching her fingers to her lips, and stepped into the steaming stall.

* * *

"Merlin, Evans, you eating for two or something?"

Lily looked up from her plate and glared at Sirius, who was sitting across from her. It was dinnertime, and the Great Hall was full and loud with the excitement that only came on Friday evenings after a long week of classes. Lily would have been just as thrilled if it had not been for the appointment she had in just a few minutes in the Potions classroom, hence her zealous pace. Well, that and the fact she had spent the lunch hour with Elias instead of in the Great Hall and hadn't eaten since breakfast.

"Shove it," Lily said, setting her knife and fork down and grabbing her bag.

"My, my, my, what has gotten into Miss Evans lately?" Sirius asked, laughing and nudging James to the right of him.

"Besides Elias Smith?" James muttered without looking at either of them and keeping his attention on Ted Knowles, a fifth year beater with whom James was discussing game tactics.

"Pigs," Lily spat, throwing her bag over her shoulder. "I'll see you girls later."

"Good luck," Keira said brightly, and Lily knew that she wasn't talking about her Potions work.

Lily was heading up to Slughorn's classroom a few minutes later, her unease increasing with each step. If it weren't for her sincere passion for Potions, she would have declined Slughorn's invitation to continue with supplement advanced Potions lessons this year, the most important of them all. Her work this year would be instrumental in her pursuit for her Potions Master License during her seventh year, which itself would make her a standout candidate for when she applied to the Healer program.

Being a physician had always been Lily's aspiration when she was a little girl, and that didn't change once she became part of the Wizarding world. In fact, her enthusiasm only increased once she learned of the Healer career. She hoped to make her footprint by effectively combining magical and Muggle treatments, using the best of both worlds.

The Healer training program at St. Mungo's was one of the most competitive programs for post-Hogwarts education, second only to Auror training. Lily knew she had what it took to be a Healer—top marks, patience, unwavering determination, and genuine concern for the welfare of others—but nowadays it took more than that, and that was why she was grateful for Slughorn's extra Potions lessons that he began during her forth year.

It was also Slughorn's connections at both the Ministry and St. Mungo's that would make it possible for her to work toward the Potions Master License next year, which was usually only offered to fully trained wizards after completion of school. As overbearing and controlling as Slughorn came off sometimes, Lily couldn't deny the value of her association with him and would be eternally grateful for it.

But the implications of these lessons and the hard work she would encounter over the next few years were not the cause for her agitation—it was the person with whom she would be continuing on this journey.

Severus was already present and chatting with Slughorn when Lily entered the classroom. She was still not ready for this, for her and Severus to be competing against each other, instead of working together. Her thoughts went back to last night, and she cringed. That was not how she wanted him to learn that she had moved on; in fact, she had been hoping for him to never find out.

"Ah! There you are Miss Evans," Slughorn greeted.

"Good evening, Professor," Lily said with a small smile. "Hello, Severus."

"Lily," Severus replied with a nod, and the look he gave her caused a variety of emotions to flood through her, everything from lament to anger to apathy.

Slughorn looked between the two with true confusion, and Lily prayed that he didn't question the extreme change in their interaction from last year. Apparently, no one up there was listening.

"Is everything okay with you two?" Slughorn asked. "I would hate to think there is any trouble between my two Potions stars."

Lily made to reply, but Severus spoke first.

"Everything is as good as it can be," Severus said. "I think we both just want to get on with whatever challenge you have for us."

Lily noted his cool tone but appreciated his directness. Severus was right—she didn't want to be in his company any longer than necessary and knew he was thinking the same.

"Of course, of course," Slughorn said, still sounding and looking uncertain. He shook his head a little before collecting himself and gesturing toward the blackboard.

"Miss Evans, before you arrived, I was explaining to Mr. Snape that a discovery has been made to help resuscitate people who have been Petrified, regardless of the source."

"Wow," Lily whispered, her interest immediately piqued. She knew that someone who had been Petrified was similar to a comatose person in the Muggle word—there was no cure or treatment; the individual would awake when the body was ready, if at all. The fact that there was a possible treatment was very promising for Wizard medicine, but she knew there must be a catch.

"Wow, indeed," Slughorn said genially. "The possibilities with such a discovery are endless. The thing is that it involves the use of Mandrake roots."

"And there's the catch," Severus said in a low voice, and Lily was both pleased and annoyed to see that they were on the same wavelength, as they always were where Potions was concerned.

"Yes, quite a problem," Slughorn said, nodding appreciatively. "Mandrake cries are very deadly, as you know, so the research has been very difficult, but solid nonetheless." He then stepped up to his teaching platform and went around to his desk. After rummaging through the drawers, he pulled out a few notebooks that Lily suspected were research reports. He then went into his private study and quickly emerged with a couple of small, sealed jars.

"Mandrake roots," he said excitedly, handing a jar to each of them. He then held up the reports. "This is the latest research on the restorative properties of Mandrake root. Our first step should be to just cook some up. I think you should be able to workout where to go from there based on what you read. I'll be grading some essays in my office, so just come on in if you have any questions. As always, summarize your findings and have a formal report for me by the next class. Feel free to wrap up when you've had enough."

Within a few minutes, Slughorn had gone into his office and shut the door, and Lily and Severus had set-up their workstations at their usual desks. Lily was excited about this project, but this particular lesson was going to drag on in an unusual silence. After only ten minutes, Lily was already thinking about going to Slughorn with an excuse of not feeling well and continuing her work alone tomorrow when Severus spoke.

"You know, he says '_our_ first step' when we're the ones doing the grunt work," Severus said, the hint of a chuckle in his voice.

Lily grinned. "And you're surprised?" She glanced up and met Severus' eyes before they both hastily looked away.

_Great, like it needs to be anymore awkward,_ Lily thought with a sigh. She now wasn't sure what she wanted, either complete silence or amiable chit-chat, not an uncomfortable mix of both. However, she knew Severus had no interest in chatting with her and that that last comment was a slip.

An hour later, Lily was immersed in her work. She had a few Mandrake roots simmering with Blood-Replenishing Potion, trying to determine the roots' effects. She wasn't sure, but she thought she could smell the Draught of Living Death coming from Severus' cauldron. It was an interesting path to take, and she so badly wanted to inquire about his analysis and subsequent hypothesis.

The soft bubbling of their potions was the only sound breaking the stifling silence until Severus suddenly spoke again.

"So you're dating Elias Smith." It was not a question.

Lily's head shot up, but Severus was not looking at her, his eyes steadily on his cauldron. Although he was obviously thinking about last night, she didn't know what prompted him to ask and wasn't sure where he was planning on going with this, though she assumed that it wasn't going to be enjoyable.

"I don't see how that's any of your business," Lily finally replied.

"Oh, it's not," Severus agreed, with the same cool, indifferent tone. "I just didn't think he'd continue to pursue you after last year. He must have been really desperate to not be lonely."

Lily cursed as she dropped her ladle, and it clattered to the bottom of her cauldron. She glowered up at him, but Severus was still not looking her way; though, the sneer plastered across his face was undeniable.

"You can say whatever you want, Severus, but you won't get a rise out of me," she said, trying to remain detached, but she knew she wouldn't be able to convince him of all people.

"Your ruined potion would beg differ," Severus replied smoothly.

Lily cursed quietly again because Severus was right. Without her spoon, she couldn't continue with the proper amount of stirs, and the potion had hardened into a useless, concrete-like fusion as a result. She threw the rest of her ingredients into the pot in frustration before whipping out her wand and vanishing it all away.

She then looked over at Severus, and this time he was finally looking at her, satisfaction written all over his face. She glared at him again, hating that he was still able to get under her skin, but she wasn't going to let him get away with it this time; she could play this stupid little game too.

"Yes," Lily began acidly, slowly walking over to him. She was happy to see his sneer falter a little and his eyes grow wide.

"If you must know, I _am_ seeing Elias and am having a _great_ time with him. He respects me, appreciates me, and isn't ashamed of being seen with me or showing his interest in me…unlike some cowards I know." Severus' face went completely white, save for the spots of pink that appeared at his cheeks, and Lily knew she had touched a nerve.

He opened his mouth to reply, but she cut him off.

"Save your breath," Lily said, shaking her head. She was now standing less than a meter in front of him. "I already know what you are going to say: that I am just his whore, that he doesn't really care about me, that we're both just worthless Mudbloods who will meet the same dire fate. I don't care, Severus. I'd rather enjoy my time here with the people I care about and who care about me, than be a pureblood or even a _half_-blood trying to fit in with a group of people who ultimately could care less about who I really am. At the end of the day, I know _my_ friends will be standing behind me when I need them the most, can you say the same about yours?

"You can pretend all you want, Severus, but _I_ will always remember the real you, the shy boy who I met at ten-years-old. So go ahead and do whatever you need to feel like a bigger man, call me a slag, tell your 'friends' about all our private moments, how you were the first to deflower the 'ice queen,' as you said they like to call me. But just know that when night falls and the hand holding your dick is your own, _I_ am with Elias and _not_ regretting any part of it."

Severus' nostrils were flaring with anger, he was breathing heavily, and his black eyes were boring into her. If Lily didn't know him well and the fact that he wasn't a physically violent person, she would have been afraid of him hitting her in that moment. She gave him one last contemptuous look before turning and heading back to her desk. She began clearing her supplies and packing her bag, desperately wanting to see his expression right now, but keeping her eyes down.

When she finished up, she slung her bag across her body and made her way toward the classroom door. She was just reaching for the handle when Severus cleared his throat.

"Lily, wait."

Lily abruptly stopped and closed her eyes, willing herself not to give in. The words were said in the tone that had always torn down her walls and made her a little weak in the knees; the low, slightly pleading voice he used when apologizing or in other, more intimate situations. It always had the same effect.

"Don't bother apologizing, Severus," Lily said, not trusting herself to turn around and face him. "There really isn't anymore for us to say." They were the same words Lily had said during their summer encounter. She thought things would be over then, but she should have known better that letting him go was not going to be easy.

"But there is," Severus said, his tone a little more desperate now. Lily could hear him walking toward her and knew she needed to leave right now before she did something she would regret later.

"I need you now more than ever."

"But what about when I needed you?" Lily whispered, slowly turning to face him. The Severus that stood before her was not the same from just a few minutes ago; the difference was startling, and it was in this moment that Lily realized the severity of his transformation and how quickly he could mask his true self. "All those times last year when I needed your friendship and you so cruelly turned me away."

Lily saw him swallow hard. His voice tight and choked, he said, "Last year was not…if I could take it back, Lily, I would give anything."

"You can't have it both ways, Severus," Lily said shakily, stuck somewhere between despair and resentment. She was falling; she had to leave. "You can't be my friend one day and betray me the next. You have to make your choice."

"So…so you're saying I still have time?"

Lily felt tears well in her eyes as she stared at him, but she eventually shook her head. "No, Severus, not anymore. Over the summer, I thought maybe…but not anymore. You chose your side, and now that _he_ is out there, it's fixed more than ever. There is no need for us to pretend as if we can make this work, as friends or anything else. Your _Lord_ and your friends would never allow it."

Severus' face was set again, and his voice went hard. "They do not rule over me; I am capable of making my own decisions."

"But you have yet to prove that."

They stared at each other in silence for a moment. Severus then took a step toward her, but Lily backed away shaking her head.

"Look," Lily said, hitching her bag up, "we obviously work well together in Potions and I want…I want to continue to study with you, but if you don't think we can act civil for only an hour a week, then I think we should talk to Slughorn about studying separately."

"I can control myself," he said sharply, and Lily noted that the walls had gone back up.

"We can't pretend anymore, Severus," Lily reminded him.

"I said I can control myself. It seems that _you_ are the one that needs convincing."

Lily glared at him, the hostility between them returning at once. "And it seems that you need to keep an eye on your potion," she said caustically, jerking her head toward his cauldron. It was smoking and crackling with sparks as a result of Severus' neglect.

Severus turned and cursed, rushing back to his desk. Lily left the room without another word.

She hurried down the corridor until she reached the girls' loo and threw herself inside, thanking Merlin it was empty. She locked herself in a stall and sat on the seat lid, rubbing her hands harshly across her face and through her hair.

_You were a fool to think it would be so easy_, Lily chastised herself. Completely dropping a friend and first love of so many years was not going to be accomplished over a few months, and she obviously was not entirely over him. This incident was evidence of that.

And then she thought of Elias and her true intentions for seeing him. She meant everything she said about him to Severus, but was she just using Elias in a veiled attempt to heal after their fallout or did she actually care for him? She supposed it was a mix of both, but she wouldn't be able to move forward with Elias if she and Severus kept going back and forth.

As much as she didn't want to believe that Severus was in the same ranks as Mulciber and Dolohov, there was too much evidence against him now. She knew it was time to let go, she _wanted_ to let go, but that little something deep down was going to make it a challenge for her.

A check of her watch told her it was five to 9:00, and she had patrols with Remus in five minutes. Sighing, Lily stood and walked out the stall, scowling at her appearance in the mirror. She splashed her face with cold water a couple of times until she felt refreshed.

A few minutes later she was back in the corridor and on her way to the common room. When she finally reached the seventh floor, she was stunned to see Elias waiting for her near the Fat Lady and inwardly groaned for not putting on any lipgloss or at least running a brush through her hair.

"Hey," he said as she reached him. He pulled her toward him and placed a light kiss on her lips. "Remus wasn't feeling well and asked me to cover for him. You don't mind, do you?"

"Of course not," Lily said, smiling brightly. She honestly wasn't too surprised that Remus had pulled out. He was looking pale and sickly again, and Lily was sure he was fighting another bout of whatever illness that periodically plagued him. It wasn't the first time he had missed patrols with her.

"Let me just drop off my bag, and I'll be right down."

Lily took off through the portrait hole and raced up the dormitory stairs. When she opened the door, she was greeted by Isabella, Keira, and Jane; the latter fixing her hair and makeup in her dresser mirror.

"Hey, girls," Lily said, throwing her bag on her bed and grabbing the brush on her bedside table. She felt eyes on her as she hastily pulled it through her hair while reaching for her makeup bag in the drawer. She turned to see Keira eying her with interest. "What?"

"I assume you're aware of Elias taking Remus' spot."

"Yeah, how did you know?" Lily asked as she applied a bit of blush to her cheeks.

"Remus told me he wasn't feeling well earlier in Ancient Runes, and he looked just terrible, worse than usual," Keira said. "Though I told him it was better to get through it now than having to battle it over Hogsmeade Saturday. He couldn't agree more."

Jane snickered, but didn't say anything.

"Just say whatever it is you need to say, Jane," Keira said in a bored voice.

Jane turned around and gave Keira a pathetic look. "Are you really that blind?"

Keira rolled her eyes. "And what exactly are you getting so dolled up for?" she asked, not taking Jane's bait, but Lily herself was intrigued. Jane might have been a little self-absorbed and artificial at times, but her observations were always spot on.

"Unlike you two," Jane began with a look to Keira and then Isabella, "I will not be sitting around this bedroom on a ripe Friday night. _I_ have a date." She applied one last coat of gloss to her lips before pushing her boobs up and fluffing her hair.

"Who are you meeting up with?" Lily asked, giving herself one last look-over.

"You tell us what's going on with Elias, and I will tell you who I am seeing," Jane said with a smirk.

Lily grimaced; she didn't want to talk about it now and hated how Jane was always able to snake her way out of things.

"I thought so," Jane said with smug smile. She then made her way toward the door. "Goodnight, ladies. Don't be surprised if I don't make it back before morning."

"Slag," Keira muttered.

"Jealous," Jane countered, blowing a kiss Keira's way and shutting the door.

"_Is_ there anything going on with you and Elias?" Keira asked after a quiet moment, looking a little hurt. Lily immediately felt guilty.

"A little," Lily mumbled. "And I promise I will tell you all about it in the morning; I'm late for patrols."

"Okay," Keira said sourly. "I'll just hang out with Isabella—"

But she was cut off as she looked at their roommate who had remained silent for the past ten minutes. Lily glanced over too as she made her way toward the door. Isabella was asleep, still fully dressed and lying with her head at the foot of the bed.

"Not surprising," Lily sighed. "I don't think she's been sleeping well."

"We have to do something," Keira said, already at Isabella's side and removing her shoes.

Lily shook her head. "Not yet; let's give her a few more days. I'll see you in the morning."

Keira pouted a little. "You're not coming back right after you're done?"

Lily smiled slyly before shutting the door behind her.

* * *

Saturday morning rain was falling, and Isabella listened to the light storm from the warm confines of her bed. Although she could hear her roommates waking up and beginning the day, she decided to wait until they left before getting up, just as she had been doing for the past couple of weeks.

She was happy for the Gryffindor Quidditch match against Ravenclaw today because it meant the common room would be empty, allowing her to be alone. Isabella had been overwhelmed at the frenzy that consumed every student during last week's Quidditch match when Hufflepuff flattened Slytherin…or was it the other way around? She honestly couldn't remember and didn't really care. All she knew was that she could easily go a few months without experiencing another game.

Ever since her run-in with Dolohov and his friends, Isabella had been consumed with homesickness for the first time since moving here. So many intense emotions had welled up inside her, and she felt so lost having no one to talk to.

True, her roommates, Lily and Keira in particular, were a wonderful group of girls, but she had only known them for a couple of months. They were not aware of the issues she needed to talk about, and Isabella wasn't sure if she was comfortable enough to share them.

Lana and Jasmine were a world away. Even if she took the time to explain everything in a letter, she wouldn't get a response for at least a couple of weeks. Besides, Amelia had just returned from her last trip to the States, and Isabella knew she was exhausted.

Writing to her father was completely out of the question—he already had enough to deal with, and Isabella wasn't ready to confront him after their last talk. Besides, if the_ Daily Prophet_ had been any indication, her father had been working double-time.

However, she couldn't help but feel a twinge of irritation towards him. Although she understood his reasoning for moving them here, she had to wonder if he had _really_ thought about the repercussions of putting them in the middle of a very dangerous war. Derrick had assured her that Hogwarts was the safest place for her to be, but she had been threatened twice within just a few weeks.

And then there was Sirius. She was grateful for him coming to her assistance, but she wasn't sure how much he had heard and was simply embarrassed about the whole situation. Although they still sat next to each other during Arithmancy, they did not speak, and at other times, she went out of her way to avoid him…and everyone else for that matter, retreating to where she was now: staring at the small group of pictures of herself with her mother, father, Lana, and Jasmine on her bedside table through a small gap in her bed curtains and longingly reminiscing about her life back in America.

"Isabella?"

She swiftly shut her eyes, but a hand was already pulling back her hangings.

"We know you're not asleep."

Isabella let out an annoyed sigh and opened her eyes. Lily and Keira were standing there, fully dressed and looking worried.

"What's been going on?" Lily asked tentatively. She had asked Isabella this question many times over the past few days but hadn't been answered once.

"It's noth—"

"And don't say it's nothing!" Keira interjected angrily.

Lily gave her an anxious look, but Keira took no notice of it and continued.

"Sirius has been approaching us a lot lately, asking if you were okay, but we couldn't really say, seeing as how you've been avoiding us for no reason."

_Sirius is worried about me?_ Isabella thought, feeling slightly lighter, but immediately felt guilty and looked away from them.

"Yeah," Lily began, sounding more confident, "he told us that you were harassed by Dolohov and his friends again. Why didn't you tell us?"

Isabella felt her throat constrict unexpectedly. "It's just personal. I…I didn't want to bother you."

Keira stepped closer as Lily sat on Isabella's bed next to her.

"Look, we know you haven't known us that long, and your business is yours to keep, but we also know that this has probably been a difficult time in your life. We're not looking to replace Lana and Jasmine, but we're here if you need anyone to talk to."

"Yeah, I mean we're going to be roommates for the next two years," Keira said. "You're going to have to befriend us at some point."

Isabella looked up to see Keira grinning; she returned her own small smile. She knew they were right—how long was she expecting to wallow in this misery? She then thought about her mom, and how she would react to her daughter giving into intimidation and fear. Her parents had taught her too well to let someone else dictate the quality of her life.

"So get up!" Lily said brightly while pulling Isabella from the bed as she stood up. "The sun is breaking through, and we have a Quidditch match to get to!"

Isabella groaned as she gained her balance.

"Yeah, yeah, we know you don't care who wins, but you have to admit that the energy in air is absolutely exhilarating!"

Isabella looked at Keira and rolled her eyes as she walked to the bathroom.

"And the after parties are always fun!"

Twenty minutes later, Isabella walked out freshly groomed and ready for the day. They all wrapped themselves in their raincoats and scarves and headed downstairs, where they were joined by Jane, who had been chatting with some seventh year friends.

"Good to see that you've rejoined the living, Isabella," Jane said with a mocking grin.

"Yeah, thanks," Isabella replied dully.

Breakfast passed quickly, with the Great Hall full of excitement and chatter. When the teams left, the rest of the students soon followed, and Isabella was swept into the whipping wind and light drizzle, which had returned.

"So, what _is_ going on between you and Elias?" Isabella asked Lily as they settled into their seats. She had heard some of what Lily told Keira last week while in that twilight stage between being asleep and awake.

Lily grinned. "So you don't talk to us for a couple of weeks and you think you're going to get gossip right away?"

"Oh, like you aren't dying to tell her!" Keira scoffed; Jane laughed and nodded in agreement.

Lily ignored them. "There is a little something going on with me and Elias. We are going to Hogsmeade together next Saturday."

"'A little something?' That's not enough. I want details," Isabella said sternly.

"Not giving them to you now; nope, don't think so," Lily said, shaking her head. "You'll have to work for them."

"Isn't me being at this match enough?" Isabella whined.

"You girls are maddening!" Jane shouted just as the teams came onto the field and the crowd erupted in cheers. "Isabella, Lily and Elias are dating even though Lily tries to deny it; they make-out and cuddle and grope each other all over the castle at any chance they get."

Lily glared daggers at Jane and opened her mouth to respond, but the latter cut her off.

"And don't act as if you're so offended. No one around heard me, and even if they did, you're sixteen-years-old. Having a good snog every now and then isn't a big deal," Jane said firmly.

Isabella tried not to laugh at Lily's new expression, somewhere between a gulping fish and McGonagall's signature angry, pursed-lip scowl. Jane was right, Lily was unnecessarily keeping this Elias thing a secret when people were going to find out eventually, but she could understand Lily not wanting _all_ of her business out there. Knowing they were dating was one thing, groping each other throughout the school was another.

"You're not _really _groping each other all over the castle, are you?" Isabella then asked, still trying not to laugh.

"No!" Lily yelled. She then smiled smugly. "We have a secret place for all of _that._"

The four of them burst into laughter. The whistle sounded from the pitch below, and the players took off into the dreary weather.

It was only thirty minutes later when the Gryffindor team was being carried on the shoulders of their housemates back to the castle. James had coached his first game as captain to a fast and very lopsided victory, 220 points to 50, and even though Isabella hadn't paid much attention to the game, she couldn't help but be impressed.

Isabella looked at her watch; it was just after 11:30. "So there is going to be an after party _now_?"

"No, not yet," Keira said. "It's going to take the boys some time to get the supplies."

"What boys?"

"Those boys," Keira said, pointing in the direction of James, who was being carried by the two beaters, Peter, who was jumping and cheering wildly behind him, and Sirius and Remus, who hung back a little and looked as if they were having a hushed conversation.

"Oh," Isabella said, feeling foolish. "And what supplies?"

"You'll see," Keira said with a mischievous grin.

"Let's take a walk around the lake until then?" Lily suggested, looking up to the sky. The sun was currently peeking out behind from the storm clouds again.

"Sounds good to me," Keira said. She then looked over to Jane. "You coming with us?"

"Uh...what?" Jane asked distractedly. She had not been paying attention to them but was looking over at the crowd of sullen Ravenclaws with an anxious expression.

"Oh, the lake!" she then shouted unexpectedly. "No, no I think I need to pass this time and go cheer up a dear friend," she added, still scanning the Ravenclaws. A wide grin then spread across her face. "Found him. See you girls later," she said, and departed without a look back.

"Ah, so now we know the bloke she was with the other night is a Ravenclaw," Lily said, looking amused as she watched Jane disappear.

"Who says it's the same bloke?" Keira muttered darkly.

Lily looked thoughtful for a second and then frowned. "Good point."

Soon they were at the lake, deciding whether to sit and relax or take a brisk walk. Being that it was still very cold, they choose the latter.

"So...what exactly made you close yourself off these past few weeks?" Keira asked hesitantly after a few minutes of mindless chatter.

Isabella felt her stomach tighten a little. She was hoping to start off with more fluff about Lily and Elias, but they were obviously more worried about her. She thought for a minute, wondering if she wanted to get into this with them.

_You brushed them off, and look, they are still here wanting to listen and willing to provide support_, her conscience told her, and Isabella knew it had a point.

Lily and Keira were going to be the ones she would have to turn to for the next couple of years and maybe beyond. She had no reason _not_ to trust them and was so thankful she had been able to make a true connection with them from the start.

Isabella took in a deep breath. "Well, it has to do with my mother, Voldemort, and why he killed her."

Lily and Keira both gasped and looked fearful.

"_Voldemort_ killed you mother?" Keira asked and a quiet voice. "But I thought it was—but the _Prophet_ made it seem like..."

"Yeah, and that is what I believed as well, but after being confronted by Dolohov that day the article about the Dark Mark came out, I learned the truth."

Keira and Lily listened attentively as Isabella recounted a shortened version her life, starting with her family, Lana and Jasmine, Garret, life at Morgana, and the whirlwind her life had been since her mother's death. They were a great audience—gasping in alarm, sputtering in anger, and providing words of sympathy in all the right places.

Isabella began to feel lighter as she talked on, grateful to get it off her chest. She now had new friends—compassionate, selfless, and faithful friends—who she could turn to when in need and to whom she would return the same support. She promised herself she would never again allow herself to carry such a heavy burden on her own and knew she would never have to.

A couple of hours later after lunch, the after party was in full swing. Isabella was shocked to find the common room full of cakes and pastries she had not seen since the Start of the Year Feast and still more that she had never seen during her short time at Hogwarts. Unashamedly, she grabbed a plate and started piling on cauldron cakes and pumpkin pasties.

"And what is this?" Isabella asked, grabbing a warm bottle of what looked like a lighter version of rootbeer from a large bucket.

"That's butterbeer," Keira answered thickly through a mouthful of treacle tart. "They only serve it here during special events, like balls, but there hasn't been one since we've been students."

"Then how did it get here?" Isabella questioned, uncorking a bottle and taking an inquisitive sniff. She drank a little and immediately felt a warming and relaxing sensation throughout her entire body.

"That's the mystery of it all," Lily said, popping a few chocolate buttons into her mouth. "Ever since fourth year, the boys have showed up to Gryffindor parties with all this stuff. The pastries and juice are from the kitchens, and it isn't difficult to convince the house-elves to give you what you want. But the other stuff—the butterbeer, the chocolate bars and candy, and the, uh, harder drinks—have to come from somewhere off school grounds, especially in such large quantities and at short notice."

"They know how to sneak off the grounds," Keira said in reply to Isabella's puzzled expression. "Even without the heightened security, the front gates won't open for anyone except professors or at special times like Hogsmeade weekends."

Lily rolled her eyes. "They _claim_ they know how to sneak off."

"But they do know," said Jane, who had just joined them and was holding a tumbler filled with a dark amber liquid. "I've been off with Sirius plenty of times."

"I bet," Keira said smartly.

"I've been trying to think of ways to get them in trouble for it ever since," Lily said, unwrapping a chocolate bar, "especially now because it's so dangerous, but there is no proof."

"And yet," came a new voice, "you continue to enjoy the fruits of our rule-breaking. I hate to say it, Moony, but little Miss Prefect here is a hypocrite."

The girls turned around to see Sirius and Remus approaching them, with Sirius looking smug and Remus looking somewhat apologetic. They both had not so furtively hidden flasks shoved into the front pockets of their trousers.

Lily blushed a little, and so did Isabella, happy that hers was not as discernible. It was the first time that she had looked at Sirius straight on since the Dolohov incident, and he was just as handsome as ever. She felt like a silly ten-year-old girl the way this stupid crush was hitting her so hard.

"Well, I might as well enjoy it if it's here," Lily said defiantly, but Isabella thought it fell a little flat.

Sirius shook his head. "Not good enough of an excuse, love. So either back away from the food or enjoy and stop with the threats."

Lily quaffed the rest of her butterbeer, glaring at Sirius all the while.

"Nice one, Evans. Have you been practicing since that night? Hopefully not with vodka, for your sake, mostly Isabella's, though," he said, winking at her. Isabella felt her stomach do a backflip and found it difficult to keep her face impassive.

"Um, what night?" Keira asked, looking from Lily to Isabella.

Lily groaned. "Thanks, Black."

"What?" he asked innocently, though his grin betrayed him. "So you had some vodka with me and Prongs, no big deal."

"What!" Jane shrieked, her face full of rage.

Lily and Isabella shared an annoyed look. They had never told Keira or Jane about that night because, simply, there was nothing to tell. Or at least they thought so. Sirius and James had obviously told _their_ friends about it because Remus had a knowing look on his face.

"Isabella and I couldn't sleep the night of the Diagon Alley attack, so we came downstairs make some dreamless sleep draught," Lily said in an off-handed tone. "Potter and Black were already down here, drowning their sorrows in a bottle of vodka. I was too tired to make the potion, so they offered and we had some so we could get to sleep fast. It wasn't a big deal."

"Then if it wasn't a big deal, why didn't you tell us?" Keira asked, looking offended.

Lily rolled her eyes in frustration. "For that very reason; it wasn't a big deal."

"Yeah, but very un-Lily-like," Jane said derisively. "Isabella, on the other hand, I didn't know you were such a lush." Isabella shot her a dirty look.

"First Elias and now this? What else are you keeping from me, Lily?" Keira snapped unexpectedly, throwing her hands in the air. "You've been very secretive and not acting like yourself at all lately, and I don't like it."

Everyone looked to Lily, who herself looked alarmed. "Keira, calm down. You're making a mountain out of a molehill. You're acting like Jane."

Keira bristled but remained quiet, sat back into her chair, and sipped her butterbeer. Every now and then, she scowled at Isabella and Lily.

"Girls," Sirius muttered; Remus shook his head, trying not to smile.

"Is there anything specific you needed with us?" Lily asked sharply after a short pause. Jane looked indignantly at her.

"Well yes, actually, Remus here—" Sirius stopped and shared a look Remus "—actually, I wanted to talk to Isabella." He took a couple of steps toward her and smiled sincerely; Isabella thought she might melt right there. "Good to see you back to normal."

"Yeah—I, well…thanks?" Isabella stammered in a tinkling voice that did not belong to her. She groaned inwardly and wished she could slap some sense into herself.

"So no more run-ins with Dolohov I take it?"

Isabella shook her head. "No, none."

"Good," Sirius said.

Isabella wasn't sure if he had taken a step closer, but she could now smell the liquor on his breath. It was something different; she didn't recognize the scent.

"What is that you're drinking?" she asked, pointing his pocket. Her voice sounded more breathy than usual, and she wanted to kick herself as soon as the words were out of her mouth.

Sirius looked startled for only a second before his face settled into a pleased grin. "It's my new favorite, a well-aged Cognac."

Isabella inhaled deeply, feeling a little tingly. "And is that…chocolate?"

"Yep, it's a special blend. Do you want to try some?" Sirius asked, pulling the flask from his pocket. He unscrewed the cap and handed it to her. She took it, but the scent this time was too strong and knocked her out of her stupor.

She glanced around to see the others staring at them. It was then she realized she and Sirius were standing less than a foot apart and leaning slightly into each other. Embarrassment burned throughout her as she hastily took a step back. At least Sirius most likely had the excuse of being drunk; she was just stupidly smitten.

"Uh, no thanks, I'm fine," Isabella said, trying to keep her voice even. She then held up her bottle of butterbeer. "I'll stick to this for now."

"Alright, but if you want to try something new…" Sirius said temptingly.

"Can I try some?"

Isabella turned to see Jane looking eagerly at Sirius.

"Yeah, sure," Sirius said dully, tossing the flask her way. "Just keep it." He then turned to Remus. "Uh, let's head back, Moony."

"Sure. You ladies enjoy the party," Remus said, nodding to them all. They were his first words since the boys approached, and Isabella wondered what his true reason for coming was.

As soon as the boys had turned and left, Keira rounded on her.

"What was _that_?" Keira demanded quietly, a huge grin across her face.

Isabella noted that her annoyance from before must have dissipated. Lily was grinning too, but Jane was glowering at her, clutching Sirius' flask as if it were a life vest.

"What was what?" Isabella asked nonchalantly.

"That—that little moment you just had with Sirius," Keira said suspiciously.

"Yeah, that _lean in_," Lily added.

"I don't know what you're talking about, but whatever you're thinking, it's _nothing_," Isabella pressed, not looking at any of them.

Keira studied Isabella for a minute. "You fancy him," Keira said, giggling when Isabella looked furious. She turned to Lily. "Do you think so?"

Lily nodded. "Mm-hmm, definitely."

"You two are officially crazy," Isabella said, shaking her head. "I don't know Sirius at all. I _do not_ like him."

"Oh, ok," Keira said skeptically. "But admit that you're at least attracted to him."

Isabella narrowed her eyes but didn't say anything.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of," Lily said while grabbing another bottle of butterbeer. "Most girls have fallen for his charm at one time or another, even Keira here during fourth year."

Keira looked outraged. "That is not true!"

"So you and Sirius were discussing that day's Summoning charm lesson in that broom closet, were you then?"

"So we had a little snog," Keira said dismissively, but her blushing cheeks betrayed her. "He really is a superb kisser though, Isabella," she added suggestively.

Isabella tried not to smile and shook her head.

"Oh, come on, just admit it," Lily said. "It isn't a big deal to admit you've got a crush. You would just join the majority of the female population at Hogwarts, so you know, not too much competition."

Isabella's insides deflated slightly, but she rolled her eyes. Today seemed to be the day where the truth was prevailing, after all.

"It's not like I'm looking to go out with him but fine—I am attracted to Sirius." She crossed her arms and gave Keira and Lily exasperated looks. "Happy now?"

"Yes," Keira and Lily said together before being overcome with giggles. They stopped abruptly at the sound of a sharp bang. The three of them looked towards Jane, who had just slammed Sirius' flask on the table. Her pursed lips and the small drop of brown liquid running down her chin indicated that she had just downed its contents. She was looking murderous between the three of them.

"Jane, before you even start—" Lily was cut off as Jane tersely stood and stalked away.

"Well, looks like Jane is going to be your main competition," Keira said indifferently.

"But I thought she was seeing that Ravenclaw guy?" Isabella asked, not wanting to cause a rift when things were going smoothly again.

Lily and Keira shared a knowing look.

"For Jane, when it comes to Sirius, no other guy matters," Lily said finally.

"Yeah," Keira added, "she would do anything to have another go with him."

* * *

Wednesday was always Isabella's least favorite and longest day. Double Transfiguration, Arithmancy, and Defense Against the Dark Arts back to back was definitely among the worst schedules ever, specially since it was an all theory day.

Transfiguration had always been one of Isabella strongest subjects, but today it was a struggle to get through. Not that the content was hard, but she was just plain tired.

'Rejoining the living,' as Jane had put it, added so much to her day. Eating, studying, and the times spent in the dormitory after waking up and before bed now took double the time since there was always intermittent gossip breaks. On top of that, the homework load had seemed to triple in the past week alone, and they were all drowning in endless essays and problem sets.

Specifically for Isabella, there was the Sirius problem. Nothing had happened between them since the Quidditch after party, but Isabella had been putting a lot of energy into remaining impassive when near him.

They had resumed greeting each other in Arithmancy, but there was nothing beyond that, which made Jane's constant glares and grumblings toward her inexplicable. According to Lily, Isabella was just one of countless girls who admired Sirius, but Jane was acting as if she and Sirius were planning their wedding.

With everything going on, Isabella barely had time to appreciate the Hogsmeade Saturday coming up in just three days. She was excited to see how it compared to Brentwood, where the Morgana and Merlin students spent one weekend a month. However, Brentwood was more like Diagon Alley in that it was all Muggle with a secret entrance to the Wizarding marketplace. When she learned that Hogsmeade was an all-wizard settlement, she was immediately intrigued.

"If I hear one more peep out of you, Pettigrew, you will spend Saturday in detention!" McGonagall shouted, snapping Isabella out of her daze.

"Sorry, Professor, I—"

"Quiet and pay attention," McGonagall said, glaring at him one more time before turning her attention back to the class. "Now, as I was saying, Conjuring spells are some of the more common advanced—"

She was cut off by a loud crack and sudden burst of flame in mid-air just a meter away from her.

"Merlin, Albus, I swear," muttered McGonagall under her breath as she grabbed the piece of parchment that fell from the dissipating smoke. A few students closer to the front snickered.

The whole class watched as McGonagall read the parchment, her frown deepening as she progressed. At the end, she balled the paper in her fist and closed her eyes, and Isabella knew something must be wrong. When McGonagall's eyes opened, she immediately looked to Isabella, and the latter felt her stomach drop.

McGonagall walked briskly toward the desk she shared with Lily and Jane and bent down close to Isabella, the entire class shamelessly watching,

"Miss Williams, the Headmaster would like to see you," McGonagall whispered.

"Do you know why, Professor?"

"The Headmaster will be able to give you all the information you need," McGonagall said hastily.

Isabella nodded. She quickly packed her bag and stood, a thought coming to her suddenly. She had a vague idea of where Dumbledore's office was from her visit this past summer and could probably find it on her own, but she didn't want to wander the corridors alone.

"Uh, Professor?" Isabella began as McGonagall made her back to the front of the classroom. "I don't know where—"

"Miss Evans, will you please escort Miss Williams?"

"Of course, Professor," Lily said politely, standing at once.

Once out of the classroom, they walked quietly for a few moments. Isabella's mind was racing, trying not to immediately think the worst, but McGonagall's face when she reached the bottom of that note was not comforting.

"What do you think is going on?" Lily asked in a hushed voice.

Isabella shrugged. "I have no idea. Anything is possible nowadays, isn't it? How often are students called out of class to see the Headmaster?"

Lily shook her head and bit her lip. "Honestly, this is the first occurrence I can think of."

Sooner than when Isabella expected, Lily stopped in front of a large stone gargoyle.

"Ice mice," Lily said clearly, and the gargoyle moved to reveal the entrance. She then turned to Isabella and gave her a quick hug. "I know everything will be okay."

"Thanks," Isabella sighed.

"And if it's not—"

"I promise I won't close up like last time."

"Good," Lily said with a small smile. "See you soon."

Isabella let out a sigh before stepping onto the moving staircase. After a slow ride, she raised her hand, but the door opened before she could knock.

"Good morning, Miss Williams, please come in," Dumbledore greeted, standing next to the door.

"Hello, Headmaster," she replied in a quiet voice and took a seat in the armchair in front of his desk.

His office had not changed since she last time she visited. The small tables were still covered with silver trinkets and instruments of all sizes. The portraits of past headmasters on the walls were intently watching her, and she instantly felt uncomfortable.

On Dumbledore's desk were numerous copies of the _Daily Prophet_, Fawkes, who was sleeping soundly on his perch, and a large ceramic bowl with cryptic engravings around its outside that Isabella recognized as a Pensieve, as her father had one. She marveled at what could possibly be stored in Dumbledore's Pensieve, as much life as he had seen; he was reported to be anywhere between 100 and 130 years old.

"Miss Williams, I bet you are wondering why I called you here," Dumbledore said, breaking into her thoughts as he sat behind the desk.

Isabella nodded but remained silent. She didn't want to waste time guessing.

Dumbledore cleared his throat, leaned forward, and clasped his hands on the desk. Isabella didn't like this formal gesture and started to prepare herself.

"I am afraid that I have some bad news," Dumbledore finally said, quietly but clearly, "regarding your father."

Isabella clenched her jaw and balled her fists but still did not say anything. She didn't want to go hysterical in front of him.

"I assume that you have been keeping up with the news through the _Prophet_," Dumbledore said, and Isabella nodded. "Yes, well as thorough as it tries to be, there are some things that the Ministry requests that they keep quiet on, things that would compromise the Ministry's battle against Voldemort.

"A couple of weeks ago, the Aurors and HitWizards were ambushed at a raid. Not much was thought of this within the offices; most people thought it was just a coincidence," Dumbledore said with a slight edge.

"Last night, however, a smaller group was ambushed again while...well, I don't need to go into the details with you." He then sighed and looked directly at Isabella. "It was a bad scene, worse than last time. Your father was badly injured."

Isabella continued to stare, her face unchanged. She knew this couldn't be the end of it. "How badly?"

"I am not aware of the exact curses that hit him, but he is presently unconscious."

Isabella started and let out a small sob. "Unconscious?"

"Yes, Miss Williams."

"Can I visit him?" Isabella asked in a strangled voice, her mind already set and her gaze drifting to Dumbledore's fireplace behind his left shoulder.

He sighed and Isabella saw the calm expression he had been wearing sag a little.

"No, you cannot," Dumbledore said soberly.

"Excuse me?" Isabella asked sharply, forgetting to whom she was talking.

"I'm sorry, Miss Williams, but you cannot visit your father," Dumbledore repeated.

"But—"

"Derrick is not at St. Mungo's, as I assume you are thinking."

"Where is he then?"

"I cannot divulge that information to you."

Isabella looked gob-smacked. "Are you serious, sir?"

"I know it sounds ridiculous to you, but the integrity of the Ministry is severely compromised right now. Voldemort has spies working too close to the Aurors and HitWizards, closer than what we originally believed. Two attacks in a row are too much of a coincidence. You're father and the other injured are being treated by Healers and MediWizards handpicked by myself in a highly secured stronghold. We cannot afford their whereabouts falling into the wrong hands again."

"Okay, I understand that," Isabella said slowly, trying to keep herself calm. "But that doesn't answer why _I_ cannot see him."

"I'm afraid it does," Dumbledore said. "The traffic in and out of their location is being tightly controlled, and I had to make the very difficult decision for that to include family, who are the most susceptible targets for capture to be used as ransom."

"Don't I know it," Isabella grumbled under her breath. "But that shouldn't matter in this situation. I will come back here after visiting him, and Voldemort or his Death Eaters won't be able to get to me."

"Oh, I agree," Dumbledore said briskly, "but protocol is protocol, and I cannot break it, even for you."

"But, but what if..." Isabella's voice trailed off as she suddenly became overwhelmed. Her father was unconscious, and she couldn't see him for the most absurd reason. What if he never regained consciousness? Her mind went back to their last interaction, and her eyes filled with guilty tears. She had been so angry with him and had not been able to settle things with him since then.

"Miss Williams, I know it may seem unfair—"

"It _is_ unfair!" Isabella interrupted, the tears now falling. "What if he never wakes up and I never…" The idea was too devastating to consider, and she openly cried, wishing she were hidden away behind her bed curtains and not sitting before the Headmaster.

After a few minutes, she collected herself and looked at Dumbledore, who was frowning.

"I promise you that as soon as he wakes up, you will be allowed to see him."

"But you can't promise me that he will even wake up!" Isabella nearly shouted.

Dumbledore nodded. "Indeed, I cannot, but I know your father will fight through this. He will do all he can to come back to you," he said in a strong, soothing voice.

Isabella remained silent as tears consumed her again; she hid her face behind her hands and tried to calm down.

"Miss Williams," he said after a short silence, "I am telling you this now because I thought you deserved to be forewarned. The _Prophet_ will be running this story tomorrow morning despite reprimand from the Ministry. The paper's staff is having a great time of creating hysteria, and it refuses to keep quiet anymore of what it considers incompetence on the Ministry's part."

Isabella nodded in understanding.

"I apologize, Miss Williams, for my part in your anger and distress, but I promise to keep you abreast of all new information. And the moment he wakes up, I personally will escort you to see him."

"Okay," Isabella said stiffly.

"And if you have no questions for me, I must take my leave. I am due for an urgent meeting." Dumbledore then stood, and Isabella did the same. "I understand if this news is a lot to digest for you. It is for that reason that I am excusing you from classes for the rest of the day, if you wish."

"Thank you, Headmaster," Isabella said, her voice still flat. She was barely on the staircase when she heard his office door close.

When back in the corridor, Isabella felt lost. She didn't know what she wanted to do—lying in bed all day didn't sound appealing because she knew she would be consumed with thoughts of her father. Going to class as usual would be a distraction but not the kind she was looking for, especially on her worst day. She looked at her watch and saw that Transfiguration had ended fifteen minutes ago and that she was due in Arithmancy.

_Ugh, definitely not going to class_, she thought crossly.

What Isabella really wanted and _needed_ was to just get away. She had been confined to the castle and grounds for two months and was due for a break. At Morgana, they would have been at least two trips to Brentwood already. She knew Hogsmeade was only three days away, but she needed an out now. If Dumbledore's words were true, everyone would know about her father's state tomorrow morning, and she was sure to be bombarded with prying questions. She needed to have at least one day to herself.

Isabella began walking toward the common room, still unsure of what to do. She had reached the seventh floor when it suddenly hit her; there _was_ a way to get the outing she wanted, and she headed back down the main staircase to the fourth floor.

A few minutes later, Isabella was opening the door to the Arithmancy classroom, hoping her plan would work. Professor Thorpe stopped mid-sentence when Isabella slowly walked into the classroom; she only nodded solemnly before continuing her lecture, and Isabella knew that Dumbledore must have already informed all of her professors.

The small number of students watched her intently as she took her seat next to Sirius, who was just as determinedly trying not to look so interested. Once seated, she took out her parchment and quill, intending to create enough pretense to quell the attention. It took only a couple of minutes before people lost interest and returned to their own work.

_Now for the hard part_, Isabella thought, hoping she would be able to keep her cool. She glanced over at Sirius, who was taking comprehensive notes, and she smiled at this. In all of their other classes, he and James put up a façade that they didn't need to bother with such a triviality.

She steeled herself and turned to face him. "Sirius?" she whispered.

"Yeah?" He kept his eyes down and continued writing.

"Can you do me a favor?"

Sirius set his quill down and looked up at her, his expression cautious. "A favor?"

"Yeah, a favor," Isabella said quietly, starting to feel weak as his grey eyes bored into her.

"Let's hear it."

"Well, I know that you probably keep it a secret for obvious reasons," Isabella said hesitantly, "but I was wondering if you could tell me how to get to Hogsmeade."

Sirius' eyes narrowed. "You want to go to Hogsmeade? Today?" he asked, a little doubtfully. "You know there is a trip on Saturday, right?"

"Yes," Isabella whispered, "but I really need to get away today."

Sirius was silent for a moment, and Isabella now started to feel uncomfortable under his stare.

"Does this have something to do with why you were called out of Transfiguration?"

"Yes," Isabella said swiftly, trying not to think about it.

"Okay...I'll help you out," he said slowly after another pause. "I assume that you can leave without any explanation, so why don't you head to the common room, and I'll meet you there in ten minutes or so."

"But how are you—"

"Don't worry about it," Sirius cut across her quickly. "Just go."

Isabella smiled widely despite herself. "Thank you," she whispered sincerely before packing her bag and leaving the room.

Her mind raced as she nearly ran to the common room, praying that her roommates, who all had a break right now, were in the dormitory so she could leave without question. She wished Sirius had just told her what to do back in the classroom, so she could avoid the common room altogether but figured he must have had his reasons.

"Flitterbloom," Isabella said when she reached the Fat Lady and climbed through the portrait hole.

After a cursory glance of the room, Isabella breathed a sigh of relief when she saw her roommates were not around. In fact, there was hardly anyone there, just a few seventh years whose names she wasn't sure of.

She dropped her bag in a dark corner and took a seat at the table closest to the entrance, thinking about her father. The thought of him being in such a frail and helpless state was unfathomable.

Only a short time had passed when she heard the portrait creak open. She stood instantly, and her stomach filled with butterflies when Sirius entered. When he found her, he smiled but kept walking toward the boys' dormitories and disappeared up the stairs. Before Isabella could find a logical reason, he was already descending the staircase with a silver cloak and ratty piece of parchment.

He stopped in front of her and grinned. "Alright, let's get going."

Isabella gaped at him. "Uh, 'let's?' What do you mean?"

"You really don't think I'm going to let you sneak to Hogsmeade on your own, do you?"

"I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself," Isabella said bitingly, her mood changing at once.

"I don't doubt that," Sirius said obligingly, and Isabella knew he was humoring her. "But the thing is that you are sneaking off to Hogsmeade during a weekday, which has a lot more complications than you think. Number one, you don't know your way around the castle that well and wouldn't be able to find the entrance to the secret passage as efficiently as you need to. Number two, as you know, students are not allowed to leave the grounds unless expressly permitted, and the Hogsmeade residents know that. I know which shopkeepers can be trusted to let us enjoy a free day without contacting the school and snitching.

"And number three," he continued, suddenly dropping his gaze, "I simply cannot in good conscience let you roam outside the safety of the castle on your own. You are in a lot more danger than I think you realize, and…and I wouldn't be able to live it down if anything happened to you while out on my direction."

Isabella was speechless, stuck between admiration and defiance. "I don't need a babysitter," she said after the latter won out.

"I know you don't, but I would feel a lot better if I came with you," Sirius said earnestly. "Besides, I won't show you how to get there unless you agree."

Isabella crossed her arms and glared at Sirius, who was trying not to smile.

"But what if we get caught? I don't want you to get in trouble because of me."

Sirius laughed, a loud, deep bark-like laugh that made Isabella grin despite her irritation. "Trust me, we won't get caught."

Isabella remained silent as she vacillated between her choices, desperate to get away but not sure if she could spend a day alone with Sirius without making a fool of herself. She had dreamt about it, of course, but reality never lived up to dreams.

"Come on, Isabella, we only have a few minutes before class ends, and we won't be able to leave with packed corridors," Sirius said, breaking into her thoughts. A challenging smirk covered his features.

_How can you say 'no' to that?_ Isabella asked herself, forcing herself to stop staring.

"Okay, okay," she relented. "You can come."

"Great," he beamed, gently grabbing her arm and pulling her toward the portrait hole. "Let's go."

Isabella sighed as she let him lead her, just wondering what the day would have in store.


	8. Take Me Out

It wasn't until Sirius watched Isabella climb into the opening behind the one-eyed, humpbacked witch that the absurdity of the situation hit him, and he frowned.

He had only known Isabella for about two months, had said maybe 200 words to her during that time, and was now expected to keep her entertained for an entire day alone in Hogsmeade?

_Why did I have to open my big mouth?_ Sirius asked himself as he clambered in after her. This wasn't the first time he had skived off lessons to head to the village, and it certainly wasn't the first time he had taken a girl with him, but those previous instances had entirely different circumstances.

When he invited a girl to Hogsmeade in the past, both parties knew what to expect. Sirius used his knowledge of how to sneak off to impress and influence whatever girl he had been infatuated with at the time. Each date had been the same—a drink and quick bite to eat at the Three Broomsticks, some forced conversation, and then a hasty retreat to a well-hidden gazebo in the woodlands behind the Shrieking Shack, where most clothing was shed with all pretense.

This obviously could not be the case with Isabella today, and in this moment, it hit him that he didn't know how to be just friends with girls. Sirius simply didn't see the point. There was nothing that a friendship with a girl could offer him that he couldn't already get from James, Remus, or Peter.

Girls came to him for one thing only, which was the same thing he sought after them for—to enjoy the fruits of being a carefree teenager. Sirius knew his charm came mostly from his 'bad-boy' image—the handsome rebel with the troubling past and family; girls saw him as someone who just needed to be loved, to be 'fixed.'

The few girls who were lucky enough to become his girlfriend, for the short time that it was, never knew the real him; he would not allow the relationship to extend past the superficial. In his mind, to let a girl in would only led to vulnerability, which, as a teenage boy, with the enemies he had created, and especially with a Dark force presently gaining power, he could not afford right now.

Today was going to be a challenge, for Sirius knew of only one way to act when taking a girl to Hogsmeade. In his mind, today could go one of two ways—he could incessantly flirt with Isabella and eventually lead her to the gazebo or outright ignore her. Of course, he knew neither of these options was fair; after all, Isabella wasn't aware of what a trip to Hogsmeade with Sirius usually entailed, and, though he knew he could be a cad at times, he just didn't have the resolve to be downright heartless to someone who was so obviously upset.

_You're just going to have to find a way to be 'friends,' if only for today_, his conscience told him, and Sirius knew it was right; he just hoped that he wouldn't make a complete fool of himself while trying.

"How much longer?"

Sirius started at the sound of Isabella's quiet voice, and he realized that they were the first words either of them had spoken in the last ten minutes since entering the passage. He suddenly felt awkward. If he was going to attempt to make this day as normal as possible, he was going to have to talk to her.

"Uh, quite a bit actually," he said, trotting a little to fall in step with her. "You don't realize how expansive the grounds are until you have to walk the length of them."

Isabella nodded vaguely before saying, "That makes sense." She lifted her arm and let her wandlight roam over the damp, dark earth surrounding them. "Where does the passage lead?"

Sirius felt a little relieved; apparently Isabella didn't want to walk in awkward silence either. "To the cellar of Honeydukes."

"And Honeydukes is?"

"The best damn candy shop you'll ever go to!" Sirius said heartily, feeling a little silly.

Isabella faced him, and Sirius was surprised to see that a small smile had replaced the anxious frown she had been wearing since appearing in Arithmancy.

"Candy shop?"

"Yep, but unfortunately the owners are among those who would send an owl to Dumbledore before serving students out of bounds, even if we came to buy the whole lot," Sirius explained, hating to burst her bubble.

"Oh..." Isabella sighed, and her smile fell a little. "Well, if that is the case, how are we going to make it out of there?"

Sirius smiled and reached into his bag. "This will help with that," he said, holding out James' cloak.

"An invisibility cloak," she said in understanding. She reached out to touch it and her eyes grew wide. "Wow, I've never seen anything like this, and my dad has always had access to the best." She then bit her lip and hastily dropped her hand before turning away and remaining quiet.

Her reaction alerted Sirius a bit, and he realized that whatever was going on must have had to do with her dad.

_Nothing too serious, I hope_, thought Sirius, but then he figured that if it had been, she probably would have been taken out of school.

"So how are you liking Britain so far?" Sirius asked quickly, wanting to stave off the impending silence but immediately regretted the question as soon as it left his mouth.

_Idiot! She probably hates this place from all the trouble it's caused her._

Isabella shrugged, still looking ahead. "I've had better visits," she said sullenly. "We used to visit at least once a year to see my mother's family, and I loved it, the charm of it all."

"Charm?" Sirius asked, sounding confused.

Laughing a little, she turned to Sirius with a sheepish grin. "I guess you wouldn't understand. To us Americans, both Muggle and magical alike, this place, the people—there's a certain appeal it all has. I guess it's because a lot of American history starts here, doesn't it? And the fact that Britain itself has so much history, compared to the State's measly 200 hundred or so years, and then there is the Muggle monarchy...I don't know, I don't think you could find a single American that wouldn't accept a free trip here, or to anywhere in Europe, really."

"Oh." Sirius didn't really understand and thought it really must have been an American thing, for he had no desire whatsoever to visit the States, though those California beaches and their dwellers he had seen in magazines didn't look so bad...

"But now?" Isabella continued, "I could certainly do without being here. If I could, I would move back in a heartbeat."

"You didn't have family you could stay with?"

"I did, a couple of aunts, and I know Lana's or Jasmine's families would have taken me in without a second thought," Isabella said.

"But...?"

"But I could never leave my father to burden this fight alone," she said, her voice suddenly going weak. "I am all he has now."

A silence followed her words, as Sirius didn't know what to say. He felt his heart ache a little for her, but he tried to brush it aside. Getting caught up in girls' lives, especially ones as turbulent as Isabella's seemed, and their feelings had never sounded appealing to him in the least. He had his own to worry about.

They continued to walk in what Sirius thought was a slightly uncomfortable silence for another five minutes until he felt the ground beneath him start to slope up.

"Almost there," he said, feeling relieved.

"So how are we going to do this?"

"It will be easy. I'll head up first, check that the cellar is clear, and then help you up. We'll hide under the cloak and then go up to the shop, where it will be easy to sneak out," Sirius explained. "The place is always busy, especially now with Halloween so close."

When they reached the top of the shallow staircase, Sirius reached above him and gently pushed the cellar board up a few centimeters. The room was empty, though he could hear noise coming from above, meaning that the cellar door was mostly likely open.

With well-practiced stealth, Sirius swung the floorboard completely open and heaved himself up. He then reached down and grabbed Isabella's already outstretched arm. She jumped a little, making it easier for him to raise her before she placed her other hand on the floor to use as leverage to pull the rest of her body up.

She used a little too much force, however, and fell heavily against him. Sirius' free hand automatically went to her waist to steady her, almost giving a small squeeze before he hastily dropped his hand.

_Not today!_ his conscience reminded him. In previous situations like this with other girls, Sirius had always given a playful squeeze accompanied with a roguish grin—a little innocent preview of what the rest of the day would bring.

_But not with Isabella, you fool_, his conscience reprimanded.

Sirius shook his head and was about to apologize to Isabella, but she had already moved on, apparently not bothered by his suggestive gesture nor noticing his silly internal conflict. She was walking around, looking longingly into the hundreds of boxes surrounding them filled with sweets, and he smiled a little. To him, she looked like a little kid who had just been told she could have only one piece.

"I know it's tempting, but you'll have to wait another three days before draining your wallet," Sirius said in a low voice while extracting the cloak again. "Get over here; we don't want to be caught."

Isabella hurried over, and Sirius wrapped the cloak around them just as he heard footsteps shuffle toward the door above. She gasped and pressed her body against him, her back to his chest, and Sirius bit the inside of his lip to keep from groaning.

"We're fine," he whispered, trying to keep control of his voice, but it was difficult with his blood starting to heat up.

It had been a few weeks since his breakup with Daphne, and for the first time since puberty hit him, girls had not been the first thing on his mind. He hadn't bothered with finding comfort in anyone else after Daphne was behind him.

The old shopkeeper, Oswald, finally reached the bottom of the steps and passed within centimeters of them, causing Isabella to push herself harder against him. Sirius had to ball his fists to keep from grabbing her waist again and pulling her closer. After all, it _had_ been weeks since his last physical encounter, he _was_ a warm-blooded sixteen-year-old boy, and Isabella's body was fitting very snugly against his own. It didn't help that a light, citrusy scent was emanating from her body, and he wondered just how difficult it would be to convince her to visit that gazebo.

_Pig_, his conscience scolded.

_And don't I know it,_ Sirius thought with part pride, part disgust.

When Oswald had busied himself with a couple of boxes in a far corner, Sirius gently pushed Isabella forward toward the stairs. "Let's go." Isabella took a couple of steps, and Sirius sighed with relief at the little space between them.

They quickly made their way up the stairs and into the shop, which was packed as Sirius had expected.

"Careful not to bump into anyone," he whispered in her ear as they navigated through the crowd close together.

"Okay," she responded in a shaky whisper, and Sirius was amused that she was nervous.

They soon reached the shop entrance, and to their luck, a frazzled looking witch was pulling her toddler son out of door with a large bag of treats. Before it closed, they snuck out behind the boy who was sucking on a sugar quill.

The weather had taken a break from its constant state of indecision, and the sun was shining brightly, though the wind was as cold as ever. He led Isabella to the alley between Honeydukes and the Owl Post Office, where he removed the cloak and stuffed it back into his bag. Once he was able to take a step back from her, he took a deep breath and felt his whole body relax.

"It's a pretty nice day," Isabella said as she smoothed her hair and robes.

"Yeah, not so bad for ditching," Sirius said with a grin. "But we can't exactly go strolling down the lane dressed noticeably like students." He then removed his tie and scarf and put them into his bag. Isabella did the same and then held them out to Sirius with a tentative smile.

"I didn't bring my bag. Would you mind storing mine for me?"

"Sure," he said and stuffed them into his bag. He hoped that citrus scent didn't stick to his belongings.

"So where are we headed?" Isabella asked, looking out onto the main street.

"Well, like I said, there are only a few places we can go," Sirius said. "We'll start at the Three Broomsticks."

He led her out onto the lane and took a long look around them. The village was as busy as usual, which surprised him a bit. With all the news about Voldemort and Dark activity lately, he assumed most people would be frightened to meander in public places.

Most importantly, though, there were no professors around, who were known to sometimes get errands done during a break between classes. He chanced a glance at Isabella, who was looking around with genuine interest.

"Uh, we're in here," Sirius said as they reached the pub. He held the door open and followed her inside, reveling in the heady warmth. There weren't that many customers yet, as it was still early, and no one gave them a second look. He headed for his usual table in the far back corner where he would be able to keep watch on the door in case a professor happened to wander in.

"Well, well, well, Mr. Black," said a female voice from behind him as he sat down. "This is the first time you've visited me since school began two months ago. I thought you had gone on the straight and narrow."

Sirius turned around, saw Madam Rosmerta walking in from the back storeroom, and grinned. She was by far one of the most beautiful witches he had ever known, with dark blond hair, bright green eyes, and a dangerously curvaceous body that always earned double, triple, and quadruple takes. The best of all, though, was that she was easy-going and able to banter with the boys without the ridiculous giggling and hint of desperation that most other girls had, even those at her age.

"Then you don't know me very well at all," Sirius said jokingly. "How are you doing, Rosmerta?"

"Quite fine," she said, letting the crates of glasses she was levitating behind her drop slowly to the floor. "So I see you've brought another new girlfriend by." She looked at Isabella and smiled. "Don't feel bad, no one can resist his charm."

Sirius laughed nervously. "Isabella is not my girlfriend," he said quickly, feeling a little irritated. For some reason, he didn't want Isabella to think this was a common occurrence.

"Oh," Rosmerta said, and she blushed a little. "Well that's a shame. She's certainly the prettiest girl you've brought along."

Isabella smiled shyly but didn't say anything.

Rosmerta then looked back to Sirius. "Two butterbeers, I presume?"

"Uh, I'll have some mead," Sirius said, deciding he was going to need something a little stronger to get through this day.

"Coming right up," she said. She levitated her crates again and walked to the bar.

"I bet she says that about all the girls you bring here," Isabella said with a small laugh.

"Actually, she doesn't," Sirius said truthfully. _And she's right_, he added to himself. Within the first two days of school, he and his roommates had placed Isabella in the top echelon of their yearly ranking of the girls of Hogwarts, with Mary Macdonald, Thalia Crake, Rina Shah, and Persephone Watson as company.

"Oh, well, she's very stunning herself," Isabella said, watching Rosmerta at the bar. Sirius was impressed that there was no bitterness in her voice. "She doesn't look that much older than us."

"She's not, just a few years older," Sirius said. He had secretly rejoiced when he learned this at the age of fourteen, thinking there would be a way for him to date her once he got a little older.

"Sirius, you flatter me," Rosmerta said as she approached with their drinks. "But don't you think you would have seen me at Hogwarts in your earlier years if I were only a 'few years older?'" She placed their drinks on the table and winked at him. "Enjoy."

They sipped their drinks quietly for a few minutes, and Sirius feared that they had run out of things to talk about already.

"This butterbeer is really delicious," Isabella said suddenly. "I thought it was just me at the after party, but now I am definitely feeling a bit tingly, as if there was—"

"Alcohol in it?"

Isabella nodded.

"There is, but only a negligible amount."

Her eyes widened in surprised. "And they serve it to everyone here?" Isabella asked in disbelief.

Sirius shrugged. "Alcohol isn't as exceedingly sheltered here as it is in the States. Someone our age enjoying a beer or two isn't a big deal, and most places will serve you if you can see over the bar."

"I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing."

"Trust me, it's a great thing," Sirius said with a large grin. "But like I said, that is kid's stuff. Mead and firewhiskey, that's where it's really at." He held up his near empty glass.

"Huh, well I'll take your word for it," Isabella said and continued to sip on her butterbeer.

Silence fell between them again. Sirius downed his drink and was about to call Rosmerta over when a thought suddenly occurred to him. It was a last ditch effort at conversation; he just hoped Isabella wouldn't be offended.

"I was just thinking," Sirius began and Isabella raised her eyebrows, "if your mother is from here, wouldn't you have extended family here too?"

"You would think so," Isabella said bitterly in a low voice but then shook her head and gave a sad smile. "We do have family, but they are no longer in Britain."

Her tone led Sirius into thinking that he had crossed the line and that the subject was dropped, but Isabella sighed heavily while twisting her glass in her hands before looking back up at him.

"My grandparents and other relatives on my mother's side were never really fond of my father, particularly my grandmother," Isabella began, still turning her mug.

Sirius realized that this was the beginning of what would probably be a long, emotional story, and he wondered if he should stop her now, though he couldn't deny that he was a little intrigued. The Jones' were one of the older pureblood families in Britain, but no one really knew much about them.

"They had always blamed him from keeping her from coming back to England," Isabella continued.

"Why did she leave in the first place?" Sirius asked. He knew some of her history already from James, but Isabella didn't know that.

"She had completed Healer training at St. Mungo's and received admission into an advanced post-certification program in New York. My mother had always been very ambitious and wanted to learn as much as she could." Isabella looked away and smiled a little, more to herself, and Sirius hoped against hope that she wouldn't start crying.

"She met my dad within a few days of being there; he was in the middle of Auror training. They dated, were engaged, and married within two years, and she stayed in the States after completing the advanced program." She rolled her eyes. "That is what never sat well with her parents and brothers. They thought she was giving up her goals to stay with him, even though she had a career of her own, and on top of that, my dad rather ruined _their_ plans for her. They already had someone in mind for her to marry—you know how the whole pureblood thing is."

Sirius nodded, understanding completely. In the years before he left home, his parents had him mentally matched up with Carin Rosier, a plain, long-faced fourth year Slytherin who had literally followed him around like a puppy dog until he was disowned.

"They put most of their animosity aside when I was born, though only for a little while," she said, rolling her eyes again. "Didn't want to risk losing visitation rights to see the first granddaughter at the time."

"A good enough reason, I guess," he said with a laugh. She narrowed her eyes a little but smiled all the same.

"When my mom died, the hostility disappeared entirely, which surprised me," Isabella said, her voice noticeably softer. "I thought they would try to blame him in some way; they did for everything else."

"A shame that it took something that tragic to…bring everyone together," Sirius said, his voice matching hers.

Isabella nodded, and Sirius noticed her eyes glimmering. She kept her eyes down and pursed her lips, as if willing herself not to cry. Sirius silently commended her for her effort to not make it awkward for the both of them.

Another quiet minute passed before Isabella spoke again. "When we decided to move here, I was actually somewhat optimistic since my mom's family had finally come around and that we wouldn't feel so alone. However, when they found out we were moving and the nature of my father's job, they left."

Sirius furrowed his brows in confusion. "Left?"

"Yes," Isabella said, nodding. "They don't support Voldemort at all, but they didn't want to be associated with someone so openly fighting against him." She finished her butterbeer and set the mug back on the table with more force than necessary. "A bunch of cowards; so much for blood being thicker than water and all that crap," she spat angrily.

A thought suddenly occurred to Sirius; in his mind he saw a second year girl with Isabella's same light brown eyes and raven hair, a Gryffindor who he knew of only because he and Wormtail had caught a couple of older Slytherins harassing her after she had strayed down the wrong corridor in the dungeons.

"Imelda Jones was a cousin of yours, wasn't she?" Sirius asked.

Isabella nodded again. "Yeah, she would have been a third year this year. You might remember another cousin of mine—Calvin Jones?"

"Of course!" Sirius said fervently. "What Gryffindor wouldn't? He was one of our best beaters ever; graduated a year ago."

"And I have another cousin who would have started at Hogwarts this year, but since they left..."

"Do you know where they went?"

"I have no idea, but I believe my father does, though he would never tell me unless absolutely necessary," she said, twirling the mug in her hands again. "He always tried to be the bigger person when it came to their attitude towards him—'they will come around in time' and 'cut them some slack, their only daughter moved 6000 miles away.' But after this last stunt of theirs, he's stopped making excuses for them. It's obvious they don't care much for their only daughter's family."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Sirius said sincerely.

Isabella shrugged. "That's the way of life sometimes," she said nonchalantly with a smile, but it didn't reach her eyes, and Sirius knew she was putting up a front. "I was never that close with my cousins considering the age difference and physical distance between us, but it would have been nice to recognize a familiar face on my first day."

"But you did recognize a face," Sirius said brightly, trying to lighten her mood. He felt somewhat responsible since he brought up her family. "Mine…and James', I guess."

"Oh yes," Isabella began, her voice laced with sarcasm, "how could I forget? I was so looking forward to seeing your scowling face again."

Sirius smiled smugly. "Who wouldn't? And don't take that glower I gave you personally; you caught me at a bad time."

"What were you doing there anyways? Potter seemed genuinely surprised to see you, and you looked like you packed enough for a long stay."

Heat crept up Sirius' back and into his face; he should have known better that bringing that day up would lead to questions.

"Uh, family problems of my own," he said hesitantly. Isabella arched an eyebrow. "I ran away from home."

Isabella's eyes widened, and she gasped.

"Oh, don't act so surprised," Sirius said derisively. "I am sure your silly roommates have already blabbed all about it."

"Well…there was speculation, but…" Isabella said timidly, her eyes shifting.

"Uh huh," he replied with a smirk. He leaned back and crossed his arms, waiting for her to break. She kept moving her eyes, looking everywhere but at him. As their silly game played on for another minute, a grin began to spread across her face.

"Alright!" she said, throwing her hands up and laughing. "My roommates told me that you had run away from home."

Sirius nodded in satisfaction.

"But why?"

Sirius' smirk faltered a little. He didn't really want to talk about it, but the weird thing was that he knew he _could_ talk about it with her, if he wanted to. Talking with Isabella was so easy. Although their two real conversations—now and that night in the common room— had started a little uncomfortably, they eventually progressed into free-flowing chatter. They barely knew each other, but Isabella had opened up to him twice without any embarrassment. It heartened him slightly that she felt comfortable enough to trust him; most other girls would just sit there, stare, and simper, saying only what they thought he wanted to hear.

"Maybe next time," Sirius said finally. Isabella's wide smile baffled him a bit, but he didn't mind looking at it. "This day is about having a good time; no more depressing stories."

"So what did you have in mind?" she asked.

"Let's head to Zonko's," he said as he took some money out of his pockets to pay their tab. "It's a joke shop," he explained before she could ask.

Isabella looked doubtful.

"I promise you'll be entertained," he said.

"I'm holding you to that," she said with a grin.

A few hours later, Sirius and Isabella were back in the Three Broomsticks. The harsh rain and freezing cold had returned while they stood outside the fence guarding the Shrieking Shack, and Sirius thought they both needed some liquid warmth before returning to the castle. The pub was much more crowded; packed to the point where they wouldn't stick out too much.

"So you're back I see," Rosmerta greeted as she approached their table with two mugs of warm butterbeer.

"It's a mess outside," Isabella said with a small shiver as she removed her soaked robes. Sirius had to quickly drop his eyes to keep from staring the obvious black bra that was visible underneath her sodden white school shirt. She took a glass with a sincere smile. "Thanks."

"A Yank, huh?" Rosmerta said in amusement, grinning at Isabella. "It'll take you a while to get used to the weather."

"It's so unpredictable, I don't think she ever will," Sirius said through a laugh. "Any professors in since we've been gone?"

"None," Rosmerta said, shaking her head. "I think you guys are in the clear. Can I get you something to eat?"

Sirius looked at Isabella. "You hungry?"

"Not at all," she said, "but thank you."

"I'll have the usual," Sirius said.

"Coming right up," Rosmerta said and sauntered toward the bar.

"I thought the Shrieking Shack was supposed to be haunted," Isabella said with disdain as she used a drying charm on her hair and clothes.

"You weren't afraid?"

"Over an old, dilapidated building?" she scoffed. "Not really."

Sirius laughed. "I guess it's not as effective on a sixteen-year-old."

"So you're saying you were afraid at a younger age?"

Sirius bit his bottom lip, trying not to smile. "Well, there _used_ to be some pretty frightening howls that came from there when I first started at Hogwarts. I think everyone was terrified."

"But recently?"

"Nothing. Whatever ghoul was there must have gained control over whatever was tormenting him," Sirius said seriously, thought he couldn't help smiling at his secret joke.

Isabella eyed him suspiciously. "I'm thinking you know much more about it than you're letting on."

Sirius nodded, almost imperceptibly.

"But you're not going to tell me what you know."

A grin played across his lips, and he shook his head.

"I'll get it out of you one of these days," Isabella said in a hard but joking voice.

"I'd like to see you try; you wouldn't be the first," he replied.

Isabella raised an eyebrow. "Is that a challenge?"

Sirius shrugged. "I guess it is."

"Alright," she said simply, and Sirius' burned to know what she was thinking.

"The usual, Mr. Black," Rosmerta said as she reached their table with a plate of fish and chips in hand.

"Thank you," Sirius said eagerly, and his stomach rumbled as if on cue. It had been expecting lunch three hours ago.

Rosmerta set it on the table in front of him and then looked to Isabella. "Are you sure I can't get you anything?"

Isabella shook her head. "No thanks."

"Alright," Rosmerta said. "Call me over if you need anything."

As soon as she left, though, Isabella reached across and grabbed a few of his chips. Sirius looked at her incredulously.

"Er...?"

"Sorry," Isabella said through a full mouth, laughing. "I'm not really hungry, but I can never resist fries if they're in front of me." She chewed a little more and then swallowed. "They're a weakness."

"Uh huh..." Sirius said, still eying her suspiciously. "And what did you call them, '_fries_?'" he scoffed. "You need to get your Brit-speak together, love. They're _chips_."

Isabella laughed and waved a dismissive hand at him. "I'll call them whatever I want. I didn't know changing the way I speak was a requirement upon moving here."

"It's not," Sirius said through a mouth full of fish, "but it is if you don't want to stick out like a sore thumb."

"My accent already does that," Isabella said sardonically.

"Touché."

They were silent for the next several minutes while Sirius ate and Isabella studied the pub interior and its patrons with interest. Unlike the previous times, however, it wasn't too awkward. At least Sirius didn't feel it, and Isabella didn't _look_ uncomfortable, though she was lightly drumming her fingers on the table.

Sirius checked his watch as he worked on the last of his food. It was 3:30, and the school day would be over in an hour. He knew they should get back soon; them both missing from class was one thing, but missing from dinner? People would get suspicious, especially if they came in together. They needed to get back after classes ended but before dinner started and enter the common room separately. But Sirius wasn't ready to end the day. He was enjoying getting to know Isabella; there were many more questions he wanted to ask.

"So tell me about your previous school."

Isabella snapped her attention back to Sirius. "What do you want to know?"

Sirius shrugged. "Anything. Was it a lot different than Hogwarts?"

"Oh yes," Isabella said with a laugh. "I'd say the biggest difference was the fact it was an all girls school."

Sirius' mouth dropped open and a chip fell back to the plate with a small clink. Isabella giggled.

"All girls?" Sirius asked, his voice and face growing serene.

"It's not as great as it seems," Isabella said flatly. "Maybe if you were the only guy...but even then, you'd get sick of girls real soon. We're much more catty among ourselves than we let on around boys."

"Trust me, we know." Sirius finished his food and wiped his mouth. "Still, the idea of an all girl school..." Sirius sat back a little and thought about the damage he could do there. The constant temptation would almost be overwhelming…almost.

"Yeah, but think about all the fighting and gossiping and backstabbing," Isabella countered.

"Like that doesn't happen here," he replied dismissively.

"But imagine it intensified a million times over," Isabella said adamantly. "And when half the school is on their—"

"La la la la!" Sirius said loudly, cutting her off and slapping his hands over his ears. "Don't need to hear that!"

Laughter erupted from Isabella, causing a few patrons to stare at them with irritation. "Typical guy."

"Moving on," Sirius said lightly, not wanting that idea to ruin his fantasy. "What about your houses?"

"We didn't have them," Isabella said simply. "Our residence was based on year. We were randomly placed with roommates our first year and were allowed to pick them each subsequent year." She shook her head. "That was the biggest cause of most fights. Imagine living with someone you think is your best friend for a year, only to learn that she applied to dorm with another group of girls for the next year, which did not include you. And then there were the boys."

"Boys? I thought—"

"We had a brother school—all boys—only a few miles away from the other side of Brentwood, which was like our Hogsmeade," Isabella explained. "We had weekend trips to Brentwood every month, had our start and end of term feasts together, and a couple of joint dances a year.

"With such small populations at both schools, everyone knew your business," Isabella continued. "Always knew who you were dating, but even worse, if you were caught meeting up with or kissing someone else under the Quidditch stands with someone who was very clearly not your significant other."

"You had Quidditch?" Sirius asked skeptically. He couldn't imagine anything more boring than watching two all girl teams playing a game.

"There were a few girls who loved the sport enough put together a few club teams, but it was nothing serious," Isabella clarified. "The boys, however, were very serious about Quidditch. Half the school was involved on a team in some way, and we were invited to watch their matches."

"So how could relationships survive when you could see each other only one, maybe two times a month?" Sirius asked. Teenage relationships were already volatile without distance complicating things; he had experienced that first hand too many times to count.

"You'd be surprised at how inventive teenagers could get when their hormones are raging," she said, snickering. "And I think the professors knew this. Keeping everyone locked up and separate from each other would have caused more trouble. It was just too easy to sneak off and meet someone for a midnight stroll or a Sunday picnic in the woods behind Morgana."

Isabella looked away again and smiled, and Sirius wondered if their current outing was her first instance of major rule-breaking. He remembered her saying something about a former boyfriend a while ago during breakfast to her roommates and wanted to ask just how much sneaking off she had done, but he figured he would sound too much like a gossiping girl.

"What time is it?" Isabella asked suddenly, intruding his thoughts.

Sirius looked at his watch. Was it already 4? "Time for us to start heading back."

"Wow, already?" Isabella asked incredulously. "Where did the time go?"

The trek back to Hogwarts passed by much more quickly. This time Isabella questioned Sirius about random things, like general information about his roommates and if they liked the House system. Before he knew it, he was extracting the invisibility cloak from his bag as they approached the humpbacked witch and pulling out the Marauder's Map.

"I meant to ask you about that before," Isabella said, pointing at the map at his hands. "Where in the world did you get your hands on that?"

"Made it," Sirius said plainly, not feeling the need to lie to her, about the basics anyway.

Isabella looked impressed, and Sirius felt his chest swell. "But how?"

Sirius shook his head, grinning. "Now if I told you that, I'd have to kill you."

Isabella sneered, rolled her eyes, but remained quiet.

"I solemnly swear I am up to no good," Sirius said clearly, tapping the map with his wand.

The map of Hogwarts and its residents slowly appeared across the parchment, and Sirius knew Isabella was watching intently over his shoulder. He was relieved to see that there was no one roaming the corridor just beyond the witch or nearly anywhere else for that matter. He knew most people must have already made it back to their respective common rooms to relax or start homework before dinner.

"We're in the clear for the most part," Sirius said. He stowed the map into his pocket and fanned out the cloak. "But we should still hide under here just in case."

Isabella nodded slowly, looking uncertain for just a second before stepping closer to him. He wrapped the cloak around them, almost immediately regretting his decision when he inhaled her refreshing scent again. Considering his current frustration, it probably would have been smarter for him to risk being caught than having Isabella so close again.

After some clumsy maneuvering, they made it out of the narrow gap and into the hall. They remained quiet as they walked back up to the seventh floor, passing only a couple of younger students who looked lost.

When they reached the Fat Lady, Isabella stopped but Sirius quickly grabbed her elbow and steered her further down the corridor and around a corner. He then removed the cloak and deeply inhaled the clean air around him.

"Sorry about that," he said quickly, realizing that his previous action was a little rude. "We very well can't enter the common room together without it causing problems."

"Oh, right," Isabella said sheepishly, looking down.

"Unless you want to be bombarded with prying questions?" Sirius asked mockingly.

Isabella shook her head quickly. "Definitely not."

"Alright then," he said, pulling the map out again. There was no one near the Fat Lady. "You can go now, and I'll give it five minutes or so before coming in."

"Okay," Isabella said softly, her eyes meeting his again. There was something earnest about her expression that made Sirius a little nervous.

"Thank you so much, Sirius, for everything today," she said sincerely. "You have no idea how much I needed this."

"You're welcome, anytime," Sirius replied, trying to keep his tone light. It hit him that he had never asked her what had happened.

They continued to stare at each other for another few silent seconds. Sirius inhaled and smelled her scent again; they were standing close to each other, as if still wrapped under the cloak. He was close enough to see her nostrils flare with each deep breath she took. That caught him off guard a little. Was she feeling just as unsettled as he was? He couldn't understand why.

"I'll see you later," Isabella said abruptly, barely above a whisper. She swallowed visibly and swiftly turned away.

Her sudden departure brought Sirius back to reality. He watched her round the corner and disappear, wondering what had just happened. He looked down to see his hand raised at the level of Isabella's waist. Had he grabbed her without realizing it?

"Mischief managed," Sirius muttered, growing annoyed with himself. He folded both the map and cloak and stuffed them into his bag. He waited for as long as his patience let him, forcing himself to think only about plausible excuses in case any of his roommates asked of his whereabouts for the day.

A few minutes later, he was entering the common room. It was full of students and a low drone of chatter. He found James and Peter at their usual spot in the furthest corner from the entrance. When he was closer, he saw that they were working on their Transfiguration essays.

"Hey," he greeted casually, sitting in an armchair across the sofa they were sharing. They looked up at him with a mixture of mild surprise and doubt.

"Where have _you_ been?" James demanded, sounding a little put out.

"Around," Sirius replied dully. "Wasn't feeling it today."

"Oh," said Peter. "We all have those days every once in a while." He smiled timidly then went back to his work. James, however, who was never so easily satisfied, eyed him warily.

"I'll explain later," Sirius mouthed silently. James nodded and went back to his work; Sirius hoped he didn't plan on asking anytime soon—he rather liked the idea of keeping it a secret, if only for a while.

Sirius extracted his Transfiguration book, wearily recognizing that he would have to be a little responsible today. He began working on his own essay, and the three of them remained silent as they worked, an occurrence that was happening more and more often these days as their N.E.W.T. coursework became nearly overwhelming.

"It's barely two months into the school year. What are these professors playing at?"

Sirius looked up from his work to see James shove his homework away in frustration. He and Peter looked at each other and decided to take James' outburst as an invitation for a break.

"It's even cutting into our pranking time," Peter said as he stretched.

"Yeah, we haven't even tried any of the stuff we bought in Diagon Alley," James complained.

"Ah, I forgot about that stuff," Sirius said through a yawn. "I guess we got caught up with all the excitement over Voldemort. Could you imagine if we had been caught doing _anything_ over the past few weeks? With all the stress the professors are under already, they probably would have just expelled us to make it easier for them."

"Hmm…good point," James agreed, yawning as well.

Peter began saying something, but Sirius' attention was on Lily, who had just descended the girls' staircase. Isabella was not with her. In fact, Isabella was not anywhere in the common room. He guessed she was in their room and wondered if she had told Lily or anyone else who may have been up there anything about their day.

"They seem to be getting along pretty well." James' voice forced its way into Sirius' thoughts. He followed James' sight to the portrait hole.

Remus had just come through with Keira from their last class of the day, Ancient Runes, though class had ended a while ago. Sirius wondered where they had been. Keira was chatting animatedly, and Remus appeared completely enthralled by whatever she was talking about. Sirius had picked up on the hints over the past few weeks that Remus was at least attracted to Keira, and he was pleased to see that Remus was finally and comfortably talking to her now. Hopefully, he would be ready to ask her on a date by the time they left Hogwarts.

They split and he made his way towards them, blushing when he realized that they had been watching him the whole time.

"Hey," he said without looking at any of them and falling into an armchair.

Sirius and James exchanged furtive looks, and James gave Sirius a slight nod.

"So," he began in a light tone, "you and Keira announce a date yet?"

Remus' eyebrows rose in confusion.

"I no longer have a girlfriend, you see. It might take me a while to find a date for the wedding," Sirius finished.

"Wankers," Remus muttered, though he couldn't help smiling.

"What's going on between you two?" James asked after they had all stopped laughing. "You seem to be spending a lot of time out of class with her."

"Well, we have a lot of work to get through," Remus said with a shrug.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Ancient Runes can't be that difficult, just a bunch of dumb symbols."

"You'd be surprised."

"You don't seem to be complaining, though," James said with a grin.

Remus shrugged for a second time. "Keira's not so bad. She's quite funny, actually."

"First Hogsmeade trip is in three days, you know," Peter said.

"So?"

"So, you should ask her," James suggested before Peter could reply.

"Are you barmy?" he said, obviously flustered. "I can't…date Keira." He looked over to where she and Lily were now being joined by Jane at their usual table. "She's wild."

"And that's bad?" James asked in disbelief.

"Alright, I'll ask her," Remus relented, "but only if you ask Lily."

"You can't win with that," James said, shaking his head. "She's seeing that idiot from Hufflepuff, and I happen to be enjoying myself with Delilah."

"You afraid Keira won't say yes?" Peter asked.

Remus glowered at him.

"We could use one of those love potions we bought if you _are_ afraid," James said.

Sirius and Peter laughed as Remus hurled his Ancient Runes book hard at James, but it was blocked by a pillow he had deftly thrown up in defense.

"Alright, alright, no love potion."

A couple hours later, they were back in the same spot discussing possible pranks for Halloween. It was after dinner, and the common room was much rowdier. Sirius did not see Isabella until dinner, when she finally made her way down from the dormitory. She smiled shyly at him only once at the table and gave him no more attention for the rest of the meal.

"Mind if I join you guys?"

Sirius looked up and saw Andy already removing his bag from his shoulder. Though Andy did join them from time to time, it had always caught him off guard.

"Not at all," James said amiably, gesturing to the empty armchair beside Sirius.

"Thanks," Andy replied, falling into the seat with a heavy sigh.

"So what brings you to our neck of the woods?" James asked.

Andy rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Too much excitement from everyone regarding this Saturday. You would think people had never been to Hogsmeade before."

"Girls driving you mad?" Sirius guessed with a wry smile.

"_And_ the guys," Andy said savagely, "if you can believe it. Adam won't leave me alone about the new girl in our year…Isabella, right?"

Sirius inhaled sharply and his body tensed. James gave him a suspicious look.

"Yeah, what about her?" Remus asked, looking as intrigued as Sirius felt.

"Well, look at her," Andy said, sniggering a little. "He's not the only one in Ravenclaw who's been asking me about her, for some reason assuming that I am an expert where she is concerned since we're in the same house. I guess the knowledge that I don't spend much time here and would know nothing more than they do must have slipped their minds. Do any of you know if she _does_ have a date so I can at least get them off my backs about that?"

"She doesn't," Peter said at once. Everyone snapped his heads toward him, all with the same doubtful look.

"I heard her talking with Lily earlier," he explained before any of them could ask. "Lily was worried that Isabella wouldn't have anyone to go with since she would be with Elias and Keira—" he gave Remus a pointed look "—well, she wasn't sure what Keira's plans were at the time."

"Oh, I guess that's good news for Adam then," Andy said, with no real enthusiasm. "Though I would feel a little weird, you know? Asking someone I've had absolutely no previous interaction with on a date? And Adam isn't necessarily the most brazen guy."

"You going with anyone?" Sirius asked abruptly, not wanting to discuss Isabella's potential suitors any longer. The topic annoyed him greatly.

Andy grimaced sheepishly. "That's the other reason I had to get away. Thalia has been very…uh, insistent lately."

"Thalia Crake?" Peter asked, the envy in his tone very evident. Even Sirius was impressed. "And you're turning her down?"

"Well, she and Adam were pretty heavy for a few months last year after Christmas, and as tempting as it is, that is a code I just can't break," Andy said.

"Ahh," the rest of them said together, understanding completely. Sirius had to admit that his own loyalty would have been tested, if even for just a minute.

They then lapsed into a comfortable silence as they went back to work; the four of them would have to put their prank plans on hold with Andy around.

Time passed incredibly slowly, Sirius thought. Although he had made good progress on his essay, he hardly knew what he was writing. With all the talk about girls, dating, and Hogsmeade, his mind kept straying to Isabella.

_Would it be weird if _I _asked her?_ Sirius thought, thinking back to Andy's words about Adam not knowing Isabella at all. They _had_ spent the day together, after all, and he didn't think Isabella would be too alarmed. Though there was the chance she could be offended, that she could accuse him of taking advantage of her considering how vulnerable she was this morning.

Sirius sighed in annoyance, ignoring the looks it garnered him from the others. He knew the question he should be asking is _why_, _why_ did he want to take Isabella out?

_Why not?_ he asked himself. She was attractive, and they had gotten along well enough today. He wouldn't mind getting to know even more about her.

_But are you sure that's the _only_ reason?_ his conscience asked, and his mind immediately went back to the urge he had felt to kiss her just before they parted, her black bra earlier in the pub, and the scanty pajamas she wore that night in the common room. He had tried not to think about kissing her earlier, but he had to admit it to himself now.

_So what if I wanted to kiss her_, he thought defiantly, but he knew it was a selfish thought. He was infatuated with her and, as always, wanted to act before thinking. It wouldn't have been fair for him to, for lack of a better word, attack her with so little history between them, regardless of how well _he_ thought their day had gone. For all he knew, she could be thinking that going to him for help was a big mistake.

The one thing that really bothered him, though, was her effect on him. There were plenty of pretty girls roaming the halls of Hogwarts, so why was Isabella causing him so much unease, why was he so drawn to her?

He felt like a sodding girl. If any of his friends knew how much he had been thinking about her since that night in the common room, that he had taken her to Hogsmeade because she was _distraught_, that he had gotten slightly jealous over Adam's intentions, as silly as they were, they would probably laugh him out of the group.

Besides, he didn't want or need a girlfriend. Dumping Daphne and staying single since then had been the best decision he had made second only to leaving home. Why would he want to get involved with all that drama again?

He glanced up from his essay just in time see Isabella heading sluggishly up the stairs to the girls' dormitories. Her shoulders were slumped, and she was rubbing the back of her neck with her right hand. He wondered if she was still stressed from whatever happened this morning and hoped she would be able to sleep well. Shaking his head, he looked away in frustration.

_There is nothing special about Isabella,_ he thought harshly, trying to convince himself. She was beautiful, that was it. Well…that and she was new. That's it: Sirius chalked up his interest to her being 'a new girl.' That is what was behind Adam's and the others' interest, right? There was always something mysterious and intriguing about the new and different.

And _that_ was it.

* * *

"So are you going to ask Delilah to be your girlfriend today or what?"

James looked away from his reflection and glared at Sirius through his dresser mirror.

_Why didn't I just stay in the bathroom to finish getting ready?_ he thought moodily.

"Shouldn't you be down at breakfast with Moony and Wormtail?" James asked, not bothering to hide the irritation in his voice. He had purposely slept in for this very reason—hoping that the others would go down to breakfast without him, leaving him in peace to get ready without their ridicule.

"It's just that you're putting a lot more effort than usual in prepping yourself for a date," Sirius said with a smirk while lounging on his bead and flipping through a Muggle motorcycle magazine. "You're even fixing your hair."

_Really?_ James thought, glancing up and stopping his hand before he could pull it through his hair again. _I guess I was._

He had hardly noticed anything he was doing this morning; his date with Delilah _was_ on his mind and for exactly the reason Sirius had been so kind to mention…and more.

Before Sirius could react, James turned and hurled the jar of hair pomade square at his head before dashing into the bathroom and locking the door with a charm.

"Damn wanker!" Sirius yelled. There then was a loud bang against the door, and James guessed he had thrown the jar back at him.

"Too late, as always" James chuckled to himself as he retrieved his shaving supplies out of his cubby and headed toward a sink.

Delilah was expecting James to ask her to be his girlfriend today; he knew this. Who wouldn't, after all? After nearly two months of steady dating, any girl would practically demand it. And for the first time since he had noticed girls, James was actually looking forward to asking.

The past month and a half with Delilah had been simply wonderful. She enjoyed Quidditch, was easy to talk to, and got along well enough with his friends in the few times they had sat together during break times.

However, the best thing about her was that unlike his previous girlfriends, Delilah held onto her own life. She didn't abandon her friends to spend every waking moment with him, and she didn't expect him to do so either. And in the times they did spend together, she didn't cling to him desperately like so many other girls had done before in fear of losing him to the next pretty thing that walked by. This had always annoyed him the most. Girls had had him confused with Sirius.

And then there was the physical part. Delilah had not let James go any further than feeling her up under her robes, and she herself had put her hands down his trousers only once before he stopped her in fear of embarrassing himself. As frustrated as this lack of interaction made him, though, he respected her for not throwing herself at him during the times he had led her to the Quidditch changing rooms or broom shed near the pitch—even if it had forced him into wanking at a rate that hadn't been seen since the time he turned thirteen.

Delilah was the type of girl, James knew, that while open to trying new things, would expect the proper sequence and decorum when it came to dating and relationships—the type of girls that James usually found to be too much trouble than their worth. But now James was open to the challenge; he liked Delilah enough to try to be the gentleman his mother thought he was, regardless of the mockery he was sure to garner from his friends. They all had to grow up at some point, right?

"Bugger," James muttered after nicking his chin with his razor. He quickly grabbed his wand from his back pocket and hastily mumbled a charm that closed the cut but left a ruddy splotch. He shrugged and reached for his aftershave.

Asking Delilah to be his girlfriend had not been what was troubling him though. It was the fact that James had found the potentially perfect girlfriend in someone who was not Lily Evans. And this bothered him.

All of what made Delilah great James had previously believed existed only in Lily. Every other girl had lacked in some way, usually subtlety, and at the end of the day, James had always come back to the conclusion that Lily was the only one for him.

But after spending so much time with Delilah, James could only grow annoyed with himself for wasting—

_No. Not wasting,_ James thought while slightly shaking his head; he didn't want to think of it too resentfully. _More so…foolishly dedicating too much undeserved time to Lily_, he corrected himself.

And that led him to question exactly why he _had_ dedicated so much time to chasing Lily. It's not as if she ever showed any interest. James had initially seen Lily as a challenge, but even he had to admit that there was a difference between a girl playing hard to get and being outright malicious, as was always the case with Lily when it came to him.

All of which, of course, made him feel like a complete idiot. James prided himself on being able to read girls well, which came from being friends with Sirius. Why had it taken him so long to realize he needed to move on? He was sixteen-years-old for Merlin's sake. His time would be much better spent concentrating on girls who were actually interested in him.

"Oi, Prongs!" Sirius sang from behind the locked door, "you have a visitor!"

James grew slightly unsettled at the obvious mirth within Sirius' voice. He ran a hand one last time through his hair before unlocking the door and pulling it open. He frowned and flushed at the sight before him.

Remus had apparently just returned from breakfast with the house-elf Tuli at his heels. Tuli was carrying a small basket in her hands, in which James could see a couple of blankets, dishes, utensils, and a vase of tulips. Behind her, she was levitating a second, much larger basket that must have been filled with the food he had requested. Sirius was fingering through the larger basket chuckling and shaking his head. Remus was tight-lipped, but James could tell he was trying to keep his laughter in.

"Tuli!" James said angrily, striding forward and leaning over her. "I told you I would come down to get these!"

"Very sorry, Mr. James Potter," she replied shakily, wincing as James snatched the basket from her hands. "I—I…it was getting late, and I thought you had forgotten. Tuli didn't want Mr. Potter's date with Miss Delilah to be ruined."

James' resolve softened a bit at the sight of the cowering house-elf. After all, she did prepare what looked like a very expansive spread despite his last minute request. He smiled.

"Of course not," James said, his voice much lighter. "I apologize and really appreciate your help with this."

Tuli bowed low. "Not a problem at all, James Potter, sir. Tuli wishes you a good day." And with a snap of her fingers, she disappeared, the large basket behind her falling to the ground with a loud thud.

James hastily grabbed the second basket and put them on his bed, not bothering to look at either Sirius, who had resumed his position on his bed, or Remus, who was now extracting his thick cloak from his trunk. James began looking for his own cloak and thought he was in the clear when Sirius spoke up.

"You must really be besotted with _Miss Delilah_ to be pulling out all the stops this early," Sirius said, his voiced laced with teasing. "You must really want to get in those knickers." Both Sirius and Remus erupted in laughter.

James rolled his eyes while he fastened his cloak. "So what if I am, besotted I mean?"

Sirius looked thoughtful for a moment. "Nothing, mate. But you start off like this, and she's going to expect picnics and flowers and whatever else all the time. You could just take her to the Three Broomsticks and be done with it." He then mockingly stroked his chin for a moment. "But I guess this would be a guaranteed way to move things forward a little faster."

"Yeah, well, maybe I wanted to try something different," James mumbled, turning away. He hated getting into these conversations with his friends, especially Sirius. They were the ones he should be able to talk about things like this, right? Why did things always have to turn into a joke or about sex?

But then again, when had _he_ not turned everything any of them had said into a joke?

_Ugh, maybe _I'm_ the one going soft,_ he thought crossly, shaking his head.

"At least I won't have to end my day with a wank like you two if the day goes well," James began, turning back to them. "Unless you two have a few too many at the Three Broomsticks and start experimenting." He smirked with satisfaction at the look of pure horror on both Sirus' and Remus' faces. They looked as if they had been hit with stinksap.

"Speaking of which," James went on, trying not to laugh, "what _are_ you two doing today?" Peter had ended up getting that detention from McGonagall earlier in the week, and James knew he had to report to her immediately after breakfast this morning.

Sirius shrugged indifferently. "Whatever the day brings us. Might meet Keira and Isabella at the Three Broomsticks later on, which Mr. Moony over here arranged," Sirius said waggling his eyebrows. "You should join us."

"I still don't understand why you just didn't ask her to Hogsmeade," James said as he pulled out his scarf and gloves.

"Why would I do that?" Remus asked irritably, though his pink cheeks betrayed him.

"Uh, because you like her?" Sirius answered sarcastically. "We're your friends, Remus; you can talk to us about these things."

Remus looked as if he would rather eat a bowl of slugs before telling Sirius anything about who he may or may not fancy. He turned and busied himself in his trunk again without saying a word.

Sirius turned to James and rolled his eyes. James shrugged and mouthed, "Drop it." He then reached for his baskets, shrunk them with a tap of his wand, and stuffed them in his cloak pocket.

"Well, I'm all set to go," James said, unable to hide his grin. "You two have a good time. Maybe I'll meet you later."

"Hope all goes well," bade Remus while Sirius muttered indistinctly, and James shut the dormitory door behind him, happy to get away from their surly moods, but his thoughts went back to Remus.

Remus had never had a serious girlfriend, or even semi-serious for that matter. He had gone on a couple of dates, but there were never follow-ups to the firsts. And for good reason.

James didn't have too much faith in the female population of Hogwarts for showing rationality if they were to ever discover Remus' secret. Growing up, he and other magical children were raised to fear werewolves, and he knew that they were portrayed as monsters in Muggle horror films. Especially now with fear and prejudice teeming within Hogwarts' halls and beyond, keeping Remus' half-breed status a secret was more important than ever before.

But Keira, despite her intense and brazen personality, was one of the few girls James thought could be trusted with Remus' secret. She was compassionate and loyal to a fault, traits she had learned from being friends with Lily, who was the only other person James would trust. But James didn't like to think about Remus' former crush on Lily and what that could have led to, and they never talked about it.

Keira would take the time to understand and maybe eventually accept Remus as a man, a beast, and everything in between. Her loud and assertive behavior would be perfect to draw Remus out of the shell he had kept himself closed in since the day he came to Hogwarts; a shell that had thickened and hardened so much over the past year alone that James worried he was losing touch with one of his best friends.

But all thoughts of Remus and his nonexistent love life vanished as he descended the marble staircase into the Great Hall. His eyes found Delilah right away, standing near the small queue of students waiting to be checked off the list by Filch. A couple of her girlfriends were with her, all chatting and laughing.

Delilah suddenly looked up and met his eyes. She smiled and gave a small wave before her girlfriends faced him and burst into giggles. Dorcas Meadows whispered something in her ear before eyeing James again and running off with the rest. James rolled his eyes but kept smiling as he reached her.

"Good morning," she greeted as she reached up to kiss his cheek.

"Morning," he replied, his body warming instantly. "How are you?"

"Excited!" she said brightly. "It will be good to finally get out of the castle." She grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the line. "I was surprised you weren't at breakfast this morning."

"Wasn't that hungry," James lied. "But I am now. I was hoping we could eat first."

"Sounds good to me. Off to the Three Broomsticks, then?" she asked after Filch checked them off, but not before eyeing James suspiciously. He glared at the caretaker before joining Delilah on the steps.

"I had something else planned, actually," James said, growing annoyed with himself for sounding nervous. He grabbed her gloved hand as they started down the path to the front gates.

Delilah faced him and raised her eyebrows. "You have something planned?"

James nodded.

"What is it?"

"It's a surprise," James replied, shaking his head, "and you'll have to wait to see what it is." He laughed when she pouted.

"Oh come on, you can wait. You always love my surprises, don't you?"

Delilah's eyes widened, and her cheeks flushed. She turned away, trying not to smile.

"Yes," she said barely above a whisper.

James knew she was thinking of his last surprise that happened just a few days prior. He had flown her to his favorite place in the Forbidden Forest: a clearing deep at the northern end that was almost meadow-like with its tall grass, bright wildflowers, and shimmering pond, completely out of place with the canopied, dark, and dense forest surrounding it. She had delighted in the unicorns and golden foals that frequented the area, and the tryst had ended with a particularly good snog that had him thinking about her as he showered later that night.

"Good," he finally said, trying not to smirk, "so trust me."

A few minutes later they had reached High Street, and James could tell Delilah was getting anxious. When they had passed the Three Broomsticks, Madam Puddifoot's, and the Hogshead, she turned around and eyed him beadily.

"You're not taking me to that stuffy Parisian restaurant, are you?" she demanded.

James laughed heartily. "Are you kidding me? I wouldn't be caught dead in there…unless you wanted to go, of course," he added tentatively.

"Never," she said, smiling with relief. "I hate those kinds of places. That's actually where the girls thought you were taking me, but I insisted that it wasn't."

"So much so that you made sure not to dress the part," James said, gesturing to her outfit. She was in jeans, trainers, and a large, puffy jacket.

She shrugged. "I like to be comfortable."

"Just how I like it," he chuckled, inwardly relieved she had not been expecting to go to the restaurant.

Le Grenouille Magique was located in the southeast corner of Hogsmeade on a small block where a few upscale restaurants and shops were located, frequented by tourists and professors. Although students usually avoided the place, they knew of its status. Every boy at Hogwarts knew that taking a girl to Madam Puddifoot's to get on her good side was one thing, but treating her to dinner at one of these select eateries and maybe a gift or two from the beauty boutique was entirely another. The girl would know that he was serious, and the boy would know he'd be getting much more than just a goodnight kiss to end the date.

"So how was your Divination exam yesterday?" James asked as they continued up the street. He wanted to keep her attention away from their final destination for as long as possible.

"Easy, as always," Delilah replied.

"I've always wondered though," James said, truly bemused, "why you ever stuck with it after O.W.L."

Delilah smiled and shook her head. "You're not the only one," she said, shrugging. "But I had to; it's a requirement for the program I'm looking into for after Hogwarts."

James' brow furrowed. "You had said you were unsure before."

Which was true, if he remembered correctly. On their first 'date' to the lake, they had talked about their tentative plans for after Hogwarts. James, though the idea of being an Auror was in the back of his mind, had said he was unsure and was open to nearly anything. Delilah had explained that she was in the same place of uncertainty.

"I lied," she replied simply. "I've never really told anyone because, well, I thought they'd think I had gone mental."

Now this had James intrigued. He scanned his knowledge of what post-Hogwarts programs would require Divination, of all classes, to apply; then it hit him.

"Department of Mysteries?" James asked, feeling both amused and impressed.

Delilah nodded sheepishly.

"It's nothing to be ashamed about," James said encouragingly. "Merlin knows you have the brains for it."

"Thanks," she said, smiling grandly at him. James felt his stomach swoop in response.

"But Dorcas, the only one I had told so far besides my parents, said that Unspeakables were always out in the field, doing dangerous recon work. I learned that wasn't true from Professor Flitwick during my career counseling last year. There are Unspeakables whose main focus is research, which they perform at the Ministry. It sounds boring to most, but all of which the department is about absolutely fascinates me. A lot of which they research is rumor and speculation, of course, but there is so much to learn about, and I want to be a part of that."

"Well, you've definitely got my support. I certainly don't have the patience to sit behind a desk all day, so cheers to you!" he said, holding up an imaginary glass.

Delilah laughed. "Thanks. And I would have probably stuck with Divination regardless. It's such a nice break from all of my real classes and is a guaranteed Outstanding with minimal effort."

"Smart thinking," James said, wondering why he hadn't thought of keeping an easy class after O.W.L. Muggle Studies might have qualified at the beginning of the year, but Professor Bing was assigning them so many essays, analyses, and case studies nowadays that he had been wishing he were a Muggle-born from time to time just to make it easier.

"Uh, James?" Delilah said after stopping.

James looked up from rummaging in his cloak pocket and saw that they had reached the end of High Street. To their right was a small, winding path that ascended and disappeared into the hills. To their left was the path that led to the Shrieking Shack.

He smiled. "We're this way," he said, jerking his head to the left.

Delilah looked over at the dilapidated building and back at James, all amusement gone from her face. "You're not serious?"

"Quite."

"But," Delilah said nervously, looking back at the house again, "it's haunted. I know you have your Gryffindor courage and all, but my Ravenclaw common sense is telling me to stay away."

James tried to keep himself from laughing, knowing it would not help his argument. "Delilah, think. When is the last time you heard anything coming from there?"

She thought for a moment, her mouth set in a hard line. "It's been a while, I guess. But that doesn't mean it's smart for us to just frolic our way inside and have tea."

"Delilah," James said slowly, still trying very hard to keep from laughing, "I've been inside plenty of times with the guys. There is nothing to be afraid of. Besides, we're not eating inside. Just behind the house."

Delilah remained silent with her arms crossed over her chest. James feared he was fighting a losing battle.

He stepped closer to her and brought his hand up to stroke her cheek. "I won't let anything happen to you while we're on the grounds. I promise," he said gently and was happy to see her relax a bit.

"Okay, I'll go," she sighed. "But this better not be some elaborate prank, James Potter, or I will never forgive you," she added sharply.

"I promise it isn't," he said, chuckling. He then extended his arm toward the path, indicating for her to go first. She shook her head and grabbed his hand, and they walked toward the house together.

About an hour later, James and Delilah were pleasantly stuffed and talking quietly. It had taken him a few minutes to convince her to join him at the table on the veranda, but all of Delilah's anxiety disappeared as soon as James tapped the baskets and their lunch set itself. The aroma of roast chicken and mashed potatoes had lured her to the table. Aside from that, there were endless bottles of butterbeer, cauldron cakes, and pumpkin pasties that had kept her mind off their surroundings.

"That was delicious, James," Delilah said after finishing another bottle of butterbeer. She scooted closer to him, and their legs were nearly intertwined. Her right hand rested absently on his knee, drawing light circles with her thumb. An innocent touch, but it was driving him mad.

"All thanks to the house-elves," James replied, his eyes dropping every so often to her right hand. It had taken all of his strength not to snog her silly during their lunch, to which he knew she probably would not have taken offense, but he was trying very hard to do everything right. He wanted to make sure she was his first.

"I would never think James Potter, serial dater of Hogwarts, would have such romantic inklings," Delilah said with a smile. "Trying to get something out of me?"

"Hmm, maybe," James said elusively, trying to ignore the 'serial dater' comment.

Delilah raised an eyebrow. "And here I thought you were doing it out of the goodness of your heart."

"I must confess that I was, or I guess _am_, trying to butter you up," James said, trying to look remorseful.

"For?"

James hesitated for a moment, trying to quell the anxiety that swelled in his chest. It was getting rather silly; this never happened.

"In hopes that you'd see I am serious in asking you to be my girl," he finally said, keeping his gaze steady.

Delilah's eyes grew in shock, her thumb stopped the circles, but then her whole face relaxed into a delighted grin.

"Really?" she asked.

James nodded.

"Of course," she beamed, and without any pretense, she leaned in and kissed him firmly on the lips.

Before he could stop himself, James grabbed Delilah's waist and pulled her into his lap so that she was straddling him. She didn't seem to mind, though, as she only deepened the kiss.

Delilah's hands played with the hair at the nape of James' neck, another soft touch that sent goosebumps up his skin. His own hands were roughly stroking her thighs, his whole body burning with a desire and need he had so chivalrously kept at bay the past couple of weeks. He itched to feel her skin.

Her hips scooted forward closer to him, and James' hands squeezed her thighs hard as she rubbed, whether intended or not, against his arousal. He knew she had felt it, but instead of shying away, she only kissed him harder. Her fervor was all he needed to spur him on, and in one swift movement, his hands ran up under her sweater to settle at her lower back and hips. He was admiring just how soft and warm her skin was when she gasped and broke the kiss.

Fearing that he had gone too far, James snatched his hands away. "Sorry," he said between breaths, not meeting her eyes. "Sorry, I shouldn't have—"

"It's okay," Delilah said over him. "I…I don't mind. It's just that your hands are freezing."

James perked up a bit and chanced a look at her. Her eyes were bright, her cheeks flushed, and her lips red and swollen; she looked magnificent.

He rubbed his hands together trying to warm them up and grinned. "How about we try again then?" he asked as he made to kiss her, but she shook her head and leaned away.

"I think I have a better way to warm you up," she said in low voice as she slid off his lap. When she was sitting beside him again, she pushed him gently so that he was reclining on the arm of the bench on which they were seated and straddled him again. After a pointed look at the bulge in his trousers, she looked back at him and smirked. She then ran a tentative but firm hand over his arousal, keeping his gaze the entire time.

James sucked in a hard breath as the blood surged excitedly through his body. But before he could give in completely and she did it again, he grabbed her wrist and sat up.

"Delilah, wait," he said, trying to keep control of his voice. "You don't have to."

She smiled. "I know I don't, but I want to. I know you've been tense for a while, and I've wanted to help you for the past couple of weeks. I just didn't want you to think I was some—"

"You're not," James said quickly. "I would never think that." He took a couple of deep breaths, his body protesting against what he was about to say. "But you don't have to. I really like you, Delilah, and I don't want you to think that I asked you to be my girlfriend only so that you would—"

"I know," Delilah said with another smile, silencing him with a finger to his lips. She then leaned forward and kissed him lightly. "But I want to, and you need it, so let me," she whispered after breaking the kiss.

James swallowed hard as his heartbeat quickened at the slight pleading in her voice. "Okay," he sighed shakily, "okay." He felt her smile against his lips.

Delilah sat up slightly and pushed him down gently again. James closed his eyes and exhaled as he let himself give in to her eager hands.

Thirty minutes later, as James and Delilah walked hand in hand down High Street, James reveled in a feeling of contentment and relief he had not felt since last spring with his then girlfriend, Katie Darringer, a now fifth-year Gryffindor.

He had always wondered at how guys always rushed through things, looking for a quick release, and had marveled at how girls always took their time.

Delilah was no different. Her hands were cold when she had first reached down his pants, but they warmed quickly. She was slow and thorough; it was agonizing ecstasy, and James thought he would die right there. Not even Katie had elicited such a reaction from him.

James had tried to reciprocate afterwards, but Delilah stopped him with a significant look and told him today was not a good day. He got the hint and immediately desisted, figuring that they would have plenty of time in near future to continue to explore.

"Would you get that foolish grin off your face?" Delilah admonished through a smile. "Everyone's going to know what we did."

"No they're not," James said with a laugh. "And even if they do assume, who cares? There's nothing wrong with a girl giving her guy a good wank."

"James!" Delilah exclaimed, looking scandalized.

He only chuckled as he held the door open to the Three Broomsticks; they had decided to enjoy some hot cocoa before heading back to the castle, and James figured he should at least check to see if the guys were around.

The pub was packed, loud, and lively as always. Students, professors, residents, and a couple of undercover Aurors, which James knew only because he knew of their disguises, were squashed into every available table and booth. He didn't see any sign of Sirius or Remus.

"Now that is one odd group," Delilah said with amusement after a short moment. James turned to where she was pointing and saw one of the larger booths occupied by Sirius, Remus, Keira, Isabella, Andy, and Adam. He smirked, wondering how this group came about.

"Shall we?" James asked. She nodded, and he led her over to the group.

Now that he was closer to them, James could see that they weren't the cheerful bunch that they appeared to be from a distance. Isabella was sitting next to the wall, with Adam on her left, and Andy next to him. Adam was chatting quite enthusiastically with her, and although Isabella seemed slightly bemused, she appeared to be enjoying herself despite the news about her father that had broke only a couple of days before.

Remus sat on the inside on the other side of the table, with Keira on his right, and Sirius next to her. She was talking animatedly as always, splitting her attention between Remus and Andy, but Remus kept mostly quiet and Andy seemed slightly unnerved with her constant movement.

Sirius was sitting with his chin in his hand, looking sulky. He appeared to not be participating in either conversation. James tried to catch his attention, but Andy saw James first.

"James, Delilah!" Andy said in greeting as they finally reached the table.

Everyone by now had turned to them, and the couple greeted them in turn. James noticed that Adam's eyes had found their joined hands; he nodded stiffly in return.

Delilah turned to James. "I'm going to head to the ladies' room," she said quietly before dashing off.

James was slightly confused but said nothing. Everyone else had already returned to their previous conversations.

"Want to join me at the bar for a minute?" James asked Sirius in a low voice. The latter grunted in response as he stood.

"So…what is all that about?" James asked as soon as they were out of earshot of the group.

"I don't know," Sirius replied irritably. "Remus and I were having a fine time earlier. Stopped by Zonkos—got some great stuff, by the way, we'll show you in the dorm—and then came over to meet the girls. Andy and Adam were already here, though, chatting it up with them."

"I don't see the problem with that, though," James said as Madam Rosmerta spotted them. "It's not like you guys were on a date."

Sirius bristled. "Not the point, mate. It's the principle. Andy and Adam never hang around us in Hogsmeade, and all of a sudden they want to butt in on our group?"

James still didn't see the issue. If anything, Remus should be the one upset about it all, but since Remus had actually never admitted his crush on Keira, James knew Remus would not complain about the situation…to them at least.

"Good afternoon, you two," Rosmerta greeted with a smile, which they both eagerly returned.

"Hello, Rosmerta," James said. "How are you?"

"Just fine, but busy as you can tell," she replied. "What can I get you?"

"Two hot cocoas, please," James said.

Rosmerta nodded and turned expectantly to Sirius.

"I'm fine," he said.

She smiled and looked back to James. "Coming right up."

James watched her as strolled to the backroom. He finally tore his eyes away and looked back to Sirius, who had been watching her as well.

"Maybe the guys fancy Keira and Isabella. Can't blame them for trying to start something," James said with a shrug.

"I don't know about Andy, but Adam certainly is interested in Isabella," Sirius said with annoyance.

"How do you know that?"

"Don't you remember a couple of nights ago when Andy joined us after dinner while we were doing homework?"

James thought for a moment but then shook his head. "No," he said honestly.

Sirius rolled his eyes with impatience. "Well, he did, and he was asking us if we knew if Isabella had a date. Said Adam was interested and wanted to know. I didn't think he was serious, though," Sirius said with a withering look back at the table.

"But…" James trailed off, scrutinizing his best friend. By the way Sirius was acting, James thought, he might be interested in Isabella. He had been acting weird since Wednesday when he had not appeared in their afternoon classes. James thought it might have had something to do with Isabella since she too had been absent, but when he had asked Sirius about it, the latter had remained mum.

And if Sirius _was_ interested, James couldn't understand why he had just not acted on it. Isabella was certainly attractive and seemed alright, and on top of that, she was 'the new girl.' Someone was bound to snatch her up soon, and it looked like Adam had had the balls to do it first.

But James resisted taking the mickey out of Sirius, who was obviously irritable at the moment. Besides, he would only deny it anyways.

"Two hot cocoas," Rosmerta sang from behind them.

"Thanks, Rosmerta," James said, turning and handing her some money.

"Not a problem, just make sure you two come visit more often like you used to," she said with a wink.

"With pleasure," James chuckled. She gave them one last smile before sauntering away.

James looked back to the group and saw that Delilah had rejoined them and was talking to Keira.

"So, did you ask _Miss Delilah_ to be your girl?" Sirius asked with a sneer as they made their way back.

"Yep."

"And she said 'yes?'"

"Yep."

"And were you able to, uh, christen your new relationship?"

"Yep."

Sirius gaped at him. "You mean she…"

"Yep."

"Right there on the veranda?"

"Yep."

"Lucky," Sirius muttered.

"That's right," James said with satisfaction, not exactly sure what Sirius had in mind with the word 'christen' but thinking it didn't matter. "Having a girlfriend isn't looking so bad right now, is it?"

"I don't need a girlfriend to get what I need," Sirius said smugly.

"Then why are you complaining?"

Sirius didn't answer as they reached the table. Delilah stood up immediately and accepted her mug of cocoa.

"Are we ready to head back?" she asked.

James frowned in confusion. "I thought we were going to hang here for a minute."

"We can take it to go," Delilah replied sweetly, but her smile was strained. James glanced behind her to see Adam watching them with a hard face.

"Yeah, sure," he said genially. He then faced the group. "See you guys later." Everyone bade them goodbye. Remus and Sirius both glared at him, to which he only smirked in response.

Delilah began talking about the Halloween feast set for tomorrow as soon as they were out the door. James listened to her halfheartedly as his mind went back to what had just happened. Adam and Delilah had obviously had a relationship in the past, which would account for his icy demeanor and her anxiety.

James wanted to ask her about it, feeling he was now fully entitled. With his free hand, he grabbed Delilah's and gave it a squeeze. She turned and smiled at him before giving him a quick kiss on the lips. She then continued on about the Halloween décor adorning the shops.

He decided against asking her about it for the moment, noting that she had regained her good mood and not wanting to ruin it.

No. Instead he would enjoy his girlfriend's company for a little while longer, before the guys ruined _his_ good mood by badgering and teasing him about her later, which he knew they were bound to do.


	9. Somewhere Only We Know

**A/N: Chapter contains adult content.

* * *

**

"Who wants butterbeer?"

"Me!" Lily, Isabella, and Jane sang at the same time with raised hands.

Lily smiled as she caught the bottle Keira tossed her way. The latter had brilliantly stolen a few bottles during the last Quidditch party and kept them in a box under her bed, chilled with a charm. Tonight, though, they would be enjoying them warm.

The first snow fell today, and the girls took this as a sign to enjoy a Thursday evening free of homework and full of gossip. Lily was hesitant at first when Keira suggested the idea, but when Elias told her during lunch that he really needed a night with the guys, she had agreed.

_Besides,_ Lily thought cynically, _maybe him missing me for a night will spur him into action._

Lily had spent the evenings of most of the last three weeks with Elias—strolling about the grounds, sitting by the lake, studying in the library, or embracing on their fourth floor balcony. She had been having a wonderful time with him, but a small issue still remained: they were not yet an official couple.

Lily would have bet her wand and life as a witch that Elias was going to ask her to be his girlfriend during their date in Hogsmeade, but he didn't get anywhere close to asking. The beginnings of impatience had started creeping up on her, but Lily tried to keep them at bay because she really enjoyed being with him. It needed to happen soon, though, because Lily would not be comfortable moving forward with Elias, emotionally or physically, until he made it official.

"Don't worry! He's going to ask you soon!"

Lily glanced up to see Keira looking exasperated at her.

"How do you know that?" she asked sulkily. She had been caught more than once over the past three weeks brooding over her situation with Elias, and it seemed as if her friends were starting to tire of it.

"Because he's a guy," Jane said as if explaining to a child. "He knows he isn't going to get more than a feel up until he asks you, and he will be wanting more soon."

"Or," Keira said with a slight edge, "he wants to make it really special. He's probably planning something ridiculously extravagant right now."

"Or maybe he's just really nervous and afraid you'll say 'no,'" Isabella offered.

"Or," Jane said and Lily knew it was going to be bad by the tone of her voice, "he really doesn't like you and is looking for a way to ditch you."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Lily mumbled as she reclined against her pillows.

"Just playing the devil's advocate," Jane said with no remorse. "We have to look at it from all angles." She missed the rude gesture Keira sent her way as she hid behind her Italian fashion magazine with a smirk.

"Come on, let's cheer up!" Isabella suddenly exclaimed. "Tonight is about fun and gossip. Who has some?"

"I do!" Keira and Jane said at the same time. They all laughed before Jane nodded at Keira.

She took a long sip of her butterbeer before starting. "I saw Grace in the loo before Astronomy today. Apparently Mr. Davies is rumored to have been cavorting with another girl after hours."

Lily sat up straight, looking appalled. "Who?"

Keira shrugged. "No one knows. All anyone has seen is him leaving the common room at odd hours and retuning looking mighty disheveled. No one would think much of it if he were out making trouble with friends, but he's been leaving alone."

"Wouldn't think he'd care about being discreet now that Mary isn't around," Lily said scathingly. "You'd think he'd approach us inquiring about her status, but I bet he hasn't checked on her once with McGonagall or anyone since she was transferred."

"Speaking of which, has there been any news?" Isabella asked.

Lily shook her had sadly. "Not since I asked McGonagall a week ago. Still unconscious, but she's stopped bleeding, and the gash has been healed." She felt a surge of anxiety course through her at her words. The project she and Severus had undertaken had weighed on her heavily since Mary's hospitalization, and especially more recently with the news of Isabella's dad. Derrick still remained unconscious as of last night.

"Well, whether he's secretly hooking up with someone else or not, he's still a prat," Keira spat. "Just heartless."

"Oh, don't be so hard on him," Jane said. The other three gaped incredulously at her, and she had the modesty to look somewhat sheepish.

"I'm just saying," she began with a shrug, "he's a nice guy. Despite the rumors, he was always good to Mary. She never complained."

"I guess," Lily said but still not sure about Jane's defense. "What stories do you have for us, Jane?"

But before Jane could start, a few sharp raps came from the window. Lily looked over and saw a dark brown owl hopping on the ledge, the top of its head and wings covered with snow flurries.

"I'll get it!" Keira said brightly as she popped up from her bed. She rushed over to the window and untied the letter from the owl's shaking leg. "It's for Isabella," she announced as the owl took flight into the darkness.

Isabella looked surprised and stood immediately. "Give it here; it could be from Dumbledore regarding my father," she said breathlessly as she hurried to Keira.

"Oh, I don't think it's from Dumbledore," Keira said with a mischievous grin. "I think it's another love letter from dear Adam."

Isabella cursed as she snatched the letter from Keira's hands. She tore it open and read hastily down the page, her scowl growing as she reached the bottom.

"Why can't he get a freaking clue!" Isabella cried as she flopped back onto her bed.

Jane jumped up and grabbed the letter from Isabella's hand before the latter could react. She cleared her throat and began to read with relish.

"_Isabella,_

_I hope your week has been going well. I know you must be busy with schoolwork, but I was still hoping we could get together before the end of term. I had a really great time with you in Hogsmeade and think the feeling is mutual. I've been trying to approach you over the past couple of weeks during meals and after class, but you always seem to be in a rush out. I figured since you haven't said a word to me, you must not have received my last three letters. So much for trusting a house-elf. Hopefully, we can have a quick word tomorrow after Potions._

_Until then,_

_Adam."_

The three girls burst into laughter as Isabella growled. Lily was the first to calm down.

"You must have really done a number on him," Lily said between breaths. "How come you didn't tell me you had such a good time at the Three Broomsticks?"

"Because I didn't!" Isabella said in exasperation. She then looked wildly at Keira. "I really didn't appear _that_ engaged while we were talking, did I?"

Keira shrugged, her body still shaking with mirth. "I wouldn't say you did, but Adam has always been known to see more than what is there. He's also a bit aggressive too. No offense to you, Isabella, but maybe he's grasping at straws because Delilah and James are pretty heavy now."

Isabella raised an eyebrow. "They dated?"

Keira nodded. "For most of fifth year, off and on. Their relationship was pretty volatile."

"Why don't you just give it a go?" Jane sniggered. "Who knows; you could end up having some fun."

"Because I'm not interested," Isabella said. "I mean, he's somewhat attractive, but he just came off so…too sure of himself and, like you said, Keira, so aggressive."

"Besides," Lily chimed in, suddenly remembering a bit of gossip she wanted to discuss, "she's interested in someone else."

Isabella frowned at her but remained silent.

"You care to tell us where you were the day Dumbledore told you about your father?" Lily asked, trying not to grin.

"I already told you; I spent it in bed and roaming about the grounds," Isabella mumbled, looking away from all of them.

"Uh huh," Lily replied, disbelief evident in her tone. Keira looked at her in question, but Lily shook her head. "Then tell me why Elias asked me where you and _Sirius_ had gone off to after leaving in the middle of Arithmancy?" Elias had randomly remembered to ask her today only after seeing Sirius and Isabella walk into Arithmancy together.

Isabella's eyes doubled in size; whether in shock, embarrassment, or anger, Lily couldn't be sure. She then closed them for a moment, and swallowed hard. When she opened them again, she looked guilty.

Keira gasped. "You _were_ with Sirius?"

Jane sat up so fast that it startled Lily. She nearly dropped her bottle of butterbeer.

Isabella nodded imperceptibly.

"Spill!" Jane, Keira, and Lily demanded at the same time.

Isabella finished her butterbeer and was silent a moment before starting.

"After I left Dumbledore's office, I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't want to lie in bed all day, didn't want to go to class; I felt so lost," she sighed, and Lily felt her heart clench. Isabella had been upfront with them regarding the news after promising them not to close up anymore, but Lily knew she had been keeping a lot of her worry and anguish to herself since that day.

"And then I remembered what you said during the after party," Isabella continued, looking at Keira. "That the boys knew how to sneak off the grounds. So I went to Arithmancy and asked Sirius if he would tell me how to get to Hogsmeade. I had no idea what I planned to do once there; I just needed a change of scenery, a day to myself.

"He said he would help me and told me to go to the common room. He followed a few minutes later, but instead of telling me, he insisted on going with me," she finished, biting her bottom lip.

"And you snuck off to Hogsmeade together?" Jane asked, her eyes blazing.

"Yes," Isabella said crisply, though not looking at her.

"And did what?" Keira asked, her eyes and voice full of excitement.

"Nothing," Isabella said briskly. "We had a drink at the Three Broomsticks, he showed me around a bit, and that's it. We weren't there too long. You girls saw me come in not too shortly after classes ended."

"If nothing happened, then why didn't you tell us from the beginning?" Lily asked smartly.

"Because I knew you would think the worst, especially after what you guys thought at the after party," Isabella explained.

"You mean you still don't like him?" Keira asked with disbelief.

Isabella hesitated for just a second. "No, I don't. It was very considerate what he did that day, but I am not foolish to think it meant anything more that what it was."

"Meaning you wish it _had_ meant something more?" Lily asked quickly, noticing Isabella's careful wording right away.

"No! I didn't mean—see! This is why I didn't tell you guys anything!" Isabella said irritably.

"Well, you're lucky then," Jane said sweetly. Lily saw that her face had smoothed into cold indifference, "regarding not reading too much into it, I mean. Sirius doesn't risk his neck sneaking off to Hogsmeade with a girl unless he was getting something in return. If he didn't even try to make a move whatsoever, he must not be attracted to you in the least."

Isabella's eyes narrowed at Jane for just a second before her expression grew impassive. "I guess not then."

"It's best not to get your hopes up where Sirius is concerned," Jane said with a smug smile.

"You're one to talk," Keira shot back.

Jane glared at her, still smiling. "Well, I would know. Sirius was actually interested in _me_."

"Keyword: _was_," Keira said maliciously.

Lily sighed and looked immediately to Jane, expecting the start of a typical trade-off of snide remarks between the two girls. This wasn't what the night was supposed to be about.

But Jane surprised her. "I'm of to shower, ladies," she said lightly. And without another look back, she traipsed into the bathroom and slammed the door behind her.

Lily and Keira shared an anxious look before Lily glanced back at Isabella. She was now standing with her back to them, unnecessarily repositioning the picture frames and miniature dragons on her bedside table.

"Isabella?" Lily asked tentatively. "You okay?"

"Yes," she replied, turning back to them with a smile. It looked sincere enough to Lily.

"So you weren't hoping that it meant something more?" Keira asked gently, and Lily chuckled silently at her veiled attempt to secure more gossip.

"No," Isabella said decisively. "I mean, from what you guys have told me about him, it was a very gentlemanly thing for him to do. I'll always be grateful for him helping me out that day."

"But what Jane said is true," Keira said, more to herself. "If he really didn't try anything…maybe you started him on a change for the better."

Lily noticed Isabella perk up, but she tried to restrain her grin.

"What about you?" Isabella suddenly asked, looking at Keira. "You were pretty chatty with Andy that day."

Keira laughed out loud. "Andy?" she repeated cynically. "I assume you asked because you haven't known him for as long as we have."

Isabella raised an eyebrow in question, but it was Lily who answered.

"Andy is a total bore," Lily said between laughs.

Keira nodded as she grabbed another butterbeer. "As insistent and boorish as Adam comes off, Andy makes up for it in a complete lack of character—too straight-laced and such a pushover. He couldn't handle me if he tried."

Isabella giggled. Just as Lily was about to ask if _anyone_ had interested Keira so far, there was another set of rapping at the window. This time a large, dark grey owl was waiting on the ledge; Lily had to suppress the sudden urge to shout with glee.

"Hercules!" she said as she sprang up and all but ran to the window. She untied the letter and patted the owl on the head. It hooted soberly before taking off.

_Lily,_

_Having a good night but wanted to drop you a quick note. Been thinking about you all evening and wish I could give you a goodnight kiss. I have something planned for us tomorrow night, so don't stay in extra Potions too late._

_See you tomorrow,_

_Elias_

Lily sighed back into her pillows with a grand smile.

"Good news?" Keira asked.

"Yes," Lily said serenely. "He's planned something for tomorrow."

"That's when it'll happen, I bet," Isabella said happily.

"And if it doesn't," Jane said as she walked back into the room in a robe while toweling her hair, "you should take some of that Felix you won to help you out."

"Lucky potion!" Keira yelled, jumping up. "I forgot all about that. Jane may just have something there."

"No. I don't need to waste Felix Felicis on this," Lily said, shaking her head. "It's bound to happen; Elias is just taking his time."

"Oh, so now he's 'just taking his time,' huh?" Keira asked, looking annoyed once again but smiling.

"Yeah, less than an hour ago he was the world's biggest prat," Isabella said, rolling her eyes.

Lily shrugged and grinned sheepishly. "It's a woman's prerogative to change her mind."

"Damn right it is!" Keira said while raising her bottle. The other girls laughed and raised their own as well.

But Lily couldn't help but give the drawer of her bedside table, in which she kept the little bottle of Felix, a surreptitious look, hoping against hope she would never grow desperate enough to use it.

* * *

Lily sighed as she hoisted her bag onto her shoulder and trudged up the last staircase to the Potions classroom Friday evening. It had been a long, tiring day, and the only thing that was going to get her through this next hour was her anticipation and excitement at what Elias had planned for afterwards.

She pushed open the door and saw that Severus was already working.

"Hello, Severus," Lily greeted politely.

He looked up and nodded. "Good evening, Lily."

Since the fiasco that was their first advanced lesson, they had fallen into a comfortable, though slightly strained, working relationship. They had even collaborated on a few ideas, realizing that neither of them was going to discover a new potion entirely on one's own.

Lily setup her workstation and began brewing Blood-Replenishing Potion, which had turned out to be a great starting point and with which she and Severus were both working. She took out her copies of the reports she had written for Slughorn over the past few weeks and began perusing them to refresh her memory.

"Lily?"

She started at the sound of her name; it had been the first words either of them had spoken in over half an hour.

"Yes?"

Severus hesitated for a moment before rushing over to her, his notes in hand.

"Over the weekend, I was looking over your notes from our last session and they got me thinking. Mandrakes have the _mind_ restorative property, so what we're missing is the _body_ or physical restorative property," Severus explained, never quite meeting her eyes. "Which is what you started to outline last week, and which is why we keep working with the Blood-Replenishing Potion, but it's still missing that something."

Lily's mind was working feverishly as Severus continued to explain his thoughts and how they coordinated with her research.

"So then I got to thinking, is there already something out there that has a rough combination of _both_ properties?" Severus said, now meeting her eyes with a glint.

Lily thought for a minute as Severus remained silent and watched her intently. An idea finally came to mind, but it was so horrid…he couldn't be serious about it.

She swallowed hard and gave him a wary look. "Unicorn blood."

Severus nodded, seemingly satisfied that she was revolted by the idea.

"But you can't be serious, though," Lily said, turning away from him and attending to her cauldron. "I'm sure the researchers at St. Mungo's have already thought about it. I mean, unicorn blood would be the perfect cure for hundreds, if not thousands, of magical maladies if the cost of using it wasn't so dire."

"Right," Severus said as he rounded her cauldron to make her face him again, "but I'm not suggesting we start working with unicorn blood. Think about _how_ unicorn blood restores life."

Lily gave her potion one last stir before setting down her ladle and looking up at Severus. His face remained pale and stoic, but she could see the excitement in his eyes. She was sure he had obviously been working at this for a while. What she wasn't sure about, however, was whether he already knew the answer to his elusive theory and was goading her, or if he was truly engaging her to help him work it out.

"Well," Lily began, looking away and sorting through the properties of unicorn blood in her mind, "it helps restore blood, stimulates the muscles to move faster, specifically the heart, strengthens the body to fight if needed, heals most injuries, and assists the mind to think clearer."

"Correct," Severus said appreciatively. "So, aren't there a variety of safe and legal ingredients that already have those individual properties? For instance, we have Blood-Replenishing Potion for the obvious, but belladonna root would help stimulate the muscles and the heart—"

"While dittany would help with healing and maybe ginger for helping the mind?" Lily interrupted, catching on immediately.

"Yes. Mandrakes are essential, of course, for restoring the mind, but the ginger may enhance or accelerate its effects," Severus said with a small smile.

"But," Lily said, still seeing a problem, "again, it's a great idea, but I feel like this would have been considered already."

"Yes, but what was missing then was a binding ingredient," Severus said elusively.

"A binding ingredient?" Lily repeated, extremely confused. Severus remained silent but nodded encouragingly.

"_A binding ingredient_," Lily whispered to herself, thinking quickly.

_We have the Blood-Replenishing Potion, trying to replicate unicorn blood…_she thought as she walked aimlessly around the room, very aware that Severus was watching her every move.

The answer suddenly came to her and she stopped and spun to face Severus. "Blood?"

"Yes," Severus confirmed. "I think it's the missing link."

"But whose would it be?"

"I think it would have to come from the person for whom the potion is being made," Severus said, his tone now revealing his uncertainty after a period of terse confidence.

Lily couldn't think of anything more morbid, but she couldn't deny that it made a good deal of sense. "I really think you're onto something."

"We just won't be able to test the theory ourselves," Severus said, sounding bitter.

Lily smiled apologetically. "Then we better tell Slughorn right away."

Within minutes, Slugnorn was standing before them, nodding and 'Hmm-ing' as they explained their research and new hypothesis.

"My, my, my," Slughorn said with an impressive smile once Lily and Severus were finished. "I say, you definitely have given this a lot of thought, and it is certainly a plausible idea. But you're right: testing this theory is well beyond your scope here at Hogwarts, even with my extra permissions. As soon as you give me your reports of today's progress, I will send it onto St. Mungo's where they can properly test your theory, so get them to me quickly!"

He then clapped his hands and looked delighted between them. "You two are just spectacular together! Good work! Now go on and enjoy your weekend!"

"Thank you, Professor," Severus said. "I'll work on my report tonight."

"And I'll start first thing in the morning," Lily said, not wanting to give up her night and not feeling at all guilty about it.

"Great! Goodnight!" Slughorn bade them before shutting himself in his study again.

Lily was elated at the prospect that she and Severus had really made a significant breakthrough. Tonight was just like their lessons over the past two years, albeit the discoveries made then were nowhere near as noteworthy. She smiled despite herself.

"Can you believe it, Sev?" Lily said as she began packing her things. "Can you imagine if this actually leads to something?"

"Yes, it certainly is exciting to think about."

Lily looked up at him at the sound of his curt tone. His eyes were down, he was already packed, and was just slinging his bag over his shoulder.

"Until next time," he said with a nod. Without another word or look back, he left the classroom.

Lily shut her eyes and exhaled slowly, trying to quell the embarrassing anxiety that surged through her.

"He made his choice," she whispered harshly to herself. "_He made his choice_."

She felt foolish for using her nickname for him and getting caught up in the moment. In the past, they would usually escape to the lake after these lessons and Severus would meet her after nicking butterbeer and snacks from the kitchens.

"But you can't live in the past," Lily admonished herself quietly. "Remember last June, what he said, how it hurt. He doesn't _deserve_ your friendship."

She shoved _Advanced Potion Making_ into her bag and forced her eyes closed again. She took a few steadying breaths, trying to unwind the uncomfortable knot that had formed at Severus' abrupt departure.

After a brief moment, Lily felt her body relax. She smiled vaguely, grabbed her bag, and left the classroom.

Once in the corridor, Lily's thoughts went back to what this night was all about. She glanced at her watch and raced into the nearest loo. She quickly brushed her hair, applied some lipgloss and blush, removed her tie, and unbuttoned the few top buttons of her shirt. Feeling mostly satisfied with her appearance, she rubbed a bit of perfume behind her ears and headed out toward the Gryffindor common room, where Elias said he would meet her.

Lily reached the Fat Lady and waited. She didn't want to risk going inside at the fear that the girls would catch and haggle her. A few older Gryffindors greeted as they entered the common room, and Lily hoped that no one would see her go off with Elias since curfew was soon approaching.

She got her wish when only seconds later, Elias appeared with no one else in the corridor. He was unshaven, his tie was gone, his shirt was untucked, and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows—he looked relaxed, rugged, and handsome.

"Good evening, Lily," he greeted, following up with a soft peck on her lips.

"Hi, Elias," she responded with a grin, the butterflies in her stomach taking flight at once.

"Ready?" he asked, offering his arm.

She took it and then looked up at him. "I've been ready all day."

He smiled and began leading her toward the main staircase.

"You'll do good to turn right back around and head to bed, young lady!" came the Fat Lady's reproving voice from behind Lily.

She was about to retort when Elias spoke over her.

"Oh hush, you old cow," he said without looking back. They were already turning a corner before her sputtering reprimands could reach them.

"Elias!" Lily chided through a laugh.

"What?" he asked, shrugging indifferently. "What's she going to do?"

"I don't know…tell Filch were sneaking around afterhours?"

"But we aren't, and we won't be. At least not for a while. We're already here," he said, stopping and gesturing around them.

It was then Lily realized that they had passed the main staircase and had rounded another corner into a hallway she was sure she had never been down.

"Uh…" Lily said with confusion, glancing around at their surroundings. On one wall, there was a painting of a bloke looking quite mad while trying to teach what looked like ballet to a bunch of bumbling trolls. On the opposite side stood nothing but bare stone.

"Where are we?"

Elias grinned. "You'll see." He then grabbed her shoulders and positioned her to face the blank wall. "Close your eyes."

Lily did as she was told. She wasn't sure what was happening, but she thought she could hear Elias walking back and forth in front of her. After a quiet moment, Elias grabbed her shoulders again.

"Open your eyes," he whispered against her ear.

Lily again obeyed and opened her eyes tentatively, not knowing what to expect. When all she saw was a large oak door in the previously blank wall, she deflated a little.

"Oh," she said flatly.

Elias chuckled behind her. "Head inside."

Lily took a few steps forward and turned the knob. The door opened slowly, and the sight inside caused Lily's mouth to all open.

She was looking at a large meadow that seemed to stretch far past her sight. Tall grasses, wildflowers, and tall, thick trees with dark, lush canopies surrounded them, save for a small pond in the middle of a clearing with short grass. Sitting in the middle of the clearing was a large blanket with a picnic basket sitting on top of it. The sun shone brightly, but pleasantly, through the tree crowns. The entire setting was refreshing and breathtaking, a stark contrast to the snowy chaos currently outside the castle.

Lily turned to Elias, who had his hands in his pockets with an anxious expression.

"How in the world—where are we?"

"The Room of Requirement," Elias said, his stance relaxing a bit at the obvious awe in her voice.

"The Room of Requirement," Lily whispered to herself, thinking back to the various times Severus had mentioned it. He had heard of its existence but was never able to find it himself. Lily hadn't paid him much heed then but felt a small rush of smugness at the thought of her experiencing it before him, and with Elias to boot.

"How did you ever find out about it?" Lily asked, still looking around in wonder.

"Well," Elias said with a grin, "your male housemates aren't the only ones who sneak around. However, we Hufflepuffs explore afterhours for the purpose of learning all we can about the castle, never for making trouble."

Lily laughed. "I'm sure of it. Tell me how it works."

"You just walk back and forth three times in front of the wall thinking about exactly what you want inside," Elias explained. He looked around, seemingly pleased with his work. "I thought you'd enjoy a nice warm spot given the weather lately."

"It's wonderful," Lily said as she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love it."

Elias kissed her lightly on the lips before grabbing her hand. He led her over to the blanket, and they both sat.

"I figured we'd still be full from dinner, so I thought we'd enjoy pudding more than anything else," Elias said as he opened the basket and extracted wrapped dishes of trifle, rhubarb crumble, and chocolate chip cookies.

"And if I'm not being too forward," he said as he pulled out a couple of bottles of sparkling dessert wine. He gave Lily an anxious grin.

_So it's going to be one of those nights_, Lily thought as she grinned back.

An hour later, Lily was stuffed with dessert and pleasantly buzzed from two glasses of wine. When Elias had offered another, she declined, not yet knowing her limit. The sun still shone comfortably upon them as a light breeze blew through the grass.

She was sitting snugly between Elias' bent legs, her back to his chest, as he leaned against a tree. Their arms were entangled and resting on her stomach, and she rested her head on his shoulder. Every few moments, she could feel his warm breath on her neck as he exhaled; it sent small shivers through her in anticipation.

They mostly had talked of their families. Lily already knew that Elias' father was a banker in London and that his mother was a ballet teacher, but tonight she had learned about his siblings. Like her, Elias was the youngest and had one older brother and one older sister, both currently at uni, with the brother recently married.

"They both sound a great deal better than old Tuney," Lily said, not caring to hide the bitterness in her voice.

Elias chuckled a little. "Oh come on, she can't be that bad. Besides, it's not like my brother and sister are so fascinated by it or are always asking questions or wishing they could be magical too. They were startled by it all, and it confuses them a little still, but they're tolerant."

"That's the thing!" Lily said, rising up slightly and throwing her arms in the air in frustration. "Tuney doesn't even bother to understand; she's completely intolerant and won't hear a word of any of my stories whenever our mum and dad ask."

"Calm down," he said in a soothing voice. He gently grabbed her shoulders and pulled her back against him before placing a soft kiss in the crook of her neck. She smiled and sighed into him.

"Do you have any idea why she acts the way she does? Maybe she's genuinely scared by it all."

_Oh, I have an idea_, Lily thought with a mix of guilt and exasperation.

From the day she was born, Lily had been the golden child of the family. She was the baby of both her immediate and extended families, and, therefore, doted on endlessly by all of their relatives.

And she certainly looked the part—while they were both fair-skinned, Petunia had inherited their father's family's sallow complexion, pointed features, and mousy-brown hair. Lily, on the other hand, had somehow received their maternal grandmother's fiery, auburn hair, startling green eyes, and milky, porcelain complexion.

She was certainly distinctive and had always received more attention from everyone, from their family and strangers on the street to their teachers in primary school and boys Petunia brought around, despite Lily being three years younger.

The word 'special' had been thrown around Lily for as long as she could remember, but she had always tried to play it down whenever Petunia as around, not wanting her sister to feel left out or unappreciated. But that had become impossible once her Hogwarts letter arrived. It had confirmed what everyone had said: that Lily _was_ special, that she would get to live in a special world that Petunia could never be a part of, no matter how many times she asked Dumbledore.

When they were young, Lily attributed Petunia's sometimes-snippy attitude to the lack of attention she received, but now Petunia only harbored resentment and jealously.

_That's why she can't tolerate it_, Lily thought. _Too many years of built of resentment and jealousy_.

But whatever their relationship now, Lily didn't think Petunia deserved to be completely humiliated in front of Elias. Enough of that had already happened with Severus.

"Maybe she is," Lily finally said after a short silence. She then rose again, shifted around, and settled into his lap, now straddling him. "But I don't want to talk about Tuney anymore."

At once, Elias grabbed her hips. "I would ask you what you _do_ want to talk about, but I think that would just be silly."

"Mmhmm," Lily murmured before kissing him. They started off slow, but the kiss quickly built up steam. With the alcohol spurring her on, Lily slipped her hands under his shirt and slid them up his warm, hard back. He stiffened for only a second before relaxing, but his hands remained stiffly at her hips, however, disappointing her a bit.

Lily broke the kiss. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing," Elias said. She wasn't sure if she believed him.

He must have sensed this because he squeezed her hips and pulled her closer. "I am thoroughly enjoying myself," he said in a low voice that sent a surge through Lily's body. "Trust me."

He kissed her hard, immediately forcing his tongue into her mouth. Lily tried to keep up, but the fog in her brain and his warm hands now creeping up her back were making it difficult. She didn't want to think anymore, she just wanted to feel and let Elias take the lead.

And he did. After another short break, Elias found her lips again. He then maneuvered them until she was lying under him. He settled between her legs but remained slightly raised; Lily knew he was holding himself back. She didn't want him to.

Still kissing him, Lily wrapped her legs around his hips and pulled him down to her. She then raised her own hips and grinded against him, feeling his arousal and hearing his low moan.

Elias broke the kiss and looked down at her. She smiled back innocently.

"What?"

"You're naughty."

She shrugged. "You and your wine are to blame for that."

"I didn't say I didn't like it," he leaned down and whispered into her ear. He then kissed her just below it and continued down her neck until Lily let out a throaty groan. He had found the spot, _her_ spot, just above her collarbone; the spot Severus had discovered just over a year ago.

_God, no_, Lily thought as Elias continued to kiss the tender area. _Don't need to think about him, not now…not ever again_.

Lily was losing herself. She knew she should wait until she was formally his girl before letting it get this far, but Elias' hands had now found their way up the front of her shirt and nothing else mattered. They were wonderfully warm and rough as they ran up her stomach and across her chest. She rubbed against his arousal again, and was just about to rise to rid herself of her shirt when Elias rose up first.

"Lily," he said barely above a whisper. This time his eyes were closed; he looked pained.

"What's the matter?" she asked for a second time.

"We have to stop," he said weakly as he rose fully off her. He finally opened his eyes, and she was surprised to see him looking ashamed.

"But why?" Lily said, her voice full of disappointment.

"Because I shouldn't…I'm sorry," Elias stuttered. "I should have never given you that wine and made you—"

"You're not making me do anything, Elias," Lily said assuredly.

"Either way, it's not right to move so fast when—"

"When what?" Lily interrupted again, now confused and slightly annoyed.

Elias looked uncomfortable. "Well, Jacob, my brother, gave me this book at my last birthday, about—about how to act around and treat girls."

"Uh huh," Lily said, instantly amused.

"And it advised that it's easy to get caught up—physically—at the beginning of a relationship, so not to move too fast, especially when the girl has never had a boyfriend."

"I have had a boyfriend," Lily said quickly.

"You have?" Elias asked, sounding too surprised for Lily's liking.

"Yes, I have," she said a bit harshly.

"I didn't mean it like that," Elias said hastily. "It's just that I can't remember ever seeing you with anyone. Who was it?"

"That doesn't matter now," Lily said, realizing that there was no way Elias could have known about her and Severus; even her best friends had never known the full details.

Elias eyed her suspiciously.

"What does matter," Lily said as she moved toward him, "is taking cues from the girl you're with. Don't take too much stock in some book." She moved his arms to make room and straddled him again. "Because any girl without dung for brains is going to let you know if you're moving too fast."

Elias nodded absently, still appearing preoccupied. "So if you've had a boyfriend before, how far have you gone? I mean, have you—are you—"

"A virgin?" Lily finished, getting impatient. She wanted to continue what they had started and didn't want to waste time now with the 'how many exes and how far' talk.

Elias raised his eyebrows.

Lily shook her head. "I'm not."

"You're not?" Elias asked, sounding even more surprised.

"You are?"

Elias nodded.

Lily was shocked. "But you've had girlfriends, that one in particular for a long time. What's her name…"

"Camille," Elias said flatly.

"Yeah, her," Lily said. Camille Laurent, the sweet, altruistic, and practically perfect Hufflepuff daughter of the French Minister of Magic who attended Hogwarts because her father so admired Dumbledore and wanted Camille to study under him. She and Elias had dated for all of fourth year and some of fifth year, if Lily remembered correctly.

"Doesn't mean we had sex," Elias said.

Lily noticed no acrimony in his voice. She cocked an eyebrow.

"I mean, physically speaking, yeah, I definitely could, wanted to," Elias explained further. "And so did she, but for me, emotionally, it wasn't there."

Now Lily was alarmed. "Emotionally? A guy?" she said skeptically before she could stop herself.

Elias didn't look at all embarrassed. He shrugged. "Yeah. I cared about Camille a lot, but it wasn't there. I know it's weird to hear a guy say that, but it's the truth. A guy can talk about casually shagging every hot bird in the school, but unless he's a completely heartless bastard, it wouldn't happen."

Lily wrapped her arms around his neck, her heart swelling with new sentiment at his honest words.

"Which is why you are 100 times the man Black or Davies will ever be," she said before kissing him softly and grinding against him.

"Lily," Elias moaned after breaking the kiss. "If you don't stop now, I won't be able to stop myself later."

"Who says I want you to?" she asked in a husky voice, happy to have that talk behind them.

Elias growled and moved so that she was under him again. He settled between her legs, kissed her forcefully, and unbuttoned her shirt before she realized what he was doing. The sweet taste of crumble on his lips and the feel of his warm hands on her skin sent her heart racing again. She pulled away and grinned up at him.

"So now that I'm not stopping you from anything," Lily said, and he chuckled, "will you have your way with me?"

Elias said nothing in response, but rubbed against her and leaned down to suckle at her spot. Lily moaned and slid her hands under his shirt and up his back again.

They continued to move against each other in a steady rhythm, their breathing growing heavier and heavier. And though Lily wished there weren't so many layers between them, she was able to thoroughly enjoy the sensation.

Between the wine flowing through her system, Elias lips on her neck, his hands on her breasts, and his arousal rubbing right against her center, it was only a few minutes before the coiled tension in her stomach exploded and she shuddered beneath him.

Lily's head fell back as she grinned stupidly at the stunning blue sky above them. As she came down from her peak, she cupped Elias' face and crushed her lips to his. She then reached a hand between them and began to rub his bulge with fervor. After a few firm strokes, she felt him stiffen and groan into her mouth. He pulled away from their kiss and grinned foolishly down at her.

"You're brilliant," he breathed before rolling off her.

They lied silently beside each other for a comfortable moment, their hands entwined. Elias suddenly squeezed her hand, brought it to his lips, and kissed it softly. The gesture was so simple, yet so tender that Lily became overwhelmed.

Nearly everything physical that had passed between her and Severus had been so cold, almost calculating, that Lily began to feel that satisfying her had become nothing more than a chore to him. And here was Elias, showing so much compassion, making her feel so desired, so appreciated with one small gesture. She had never imagined it could be like this, that it _should_ be like this.

Lily looked away as her throat constricted and eyes filled with tears, not wanting Elias to sense anything was wrong. She knew that the wine was contributing to her overemotional state, but the basis for it was genuine.

She and Elias still may not have been an official couple, but in this moment, with them lying together under the sun and him holding her hand so securely, it didn't matter.

* * *

Isabella loved Thursdays. She had most of the afternoon off and was able to enjoy some alone time. Keira and Lily both had class while Jane was usually off doing Merlin knows what.

This particular Thursday she had escaped to the dormitory after Charms to finally read the letters she had neglected for too long. She glanced quickly at the clock on her bedside table and figured she had enough time to read the last letter and write a reply before the school day ended and her roommates returned. She knew she should be reviewing her Arithmancy notes for the test tomorrow, but didn't really care; the memories conjured from Garret's words had displaced everything else.

_August 2, 1976_

_Isabella,_

That hurt. He had used her full name this time. She couldn't remember that last time he had used it; Garret had called her 'Bella' since they were ten-years-old, the only boy she had ever let use the nickname.

_I'm not sure if my other two letters ever reached you, but I hope this one does. However, I am no fool—if I don't receive a response, which I'm afraid I won't, this will be my last._

_I feared that you might ignore me, but I actually didn't think you would. As much as it should piss me off, though, my anger would only be in vain—with the school year just a week away, you are all I think about._

_I know you probably think it is weird for a sixteen-year-old boy to talk about his feelings, but you knew how I felt about you, and I know you felt the same way. You have no idea how much I miss you._

_My family and I are currently vacationing in Westhampton, and I wish you were here as we had planned. The beaches and Quidditch pitches are nice, but they are very boring when the only people you have to share them with are your annoying sisters. I can't imagine how they will be once they start at Morgana this year._

Isabella smiled as she thought about Serena and Sonia, Garret's eleven-year-old twin sisters. She had only heard about their maddening behavior through his biased stories but had been looking forward to guiding them through their first year at the Academy.

_Besides, all of the secret places I had scoped out while here last summer are going to waste…do you remember that day we spent in Brentwood? What I wouldn't give to continue what we started then._

How could Isabella forget that day in May? It was the last Saturday trip into Brentwood for the two schools before their Wizarding Aptitude Tests. She and Garret had pulled away from their friends and snuck off to a secluded copse of trees near the river that they had visited many times before.

That time Garret conjured cushions and blankets for them, and before she knew it, Isabella was lying under him, letting him go farther than ever before. She had been afraid of the intense pleasure she felt as he moved his hands under her shirt and inside her jeans, but she knew she could trust him.

Isabella felt the back of her neck grow hot, and she loosened her robes as she thought about how she had returned the favor soon after. She had known that he didn't expect her to have sex then, but had she still been in the States and accompanied him to Westhampton, she wouldn't have thought twice about saying 'yes' if the opportunity had came up.

Feeling the blood rush inside her, Isabella shook her head and slowed her breathing. She tried to focus back on the letter.

_I guess I should end it here. This has probably just been thrown away with my other letters. But in case you are reading, I want you to know that much to my mother's disappointment, my father has planned a tour of Europe over Christmas break. I would really like to see you during the two days we spend in England; you could show me wizarding London or something. Let me know._

_Take care,_

_Garret_

Isabella sighed heavily as she refolded the letter, feeling guilty, distressed, and, if she were completely honest with herself, slightly horny. She was angry with herself for ignoring him, but knew that sending him a letter now was better late than never. She only hoped that he was still interested in visiting her in December.

Grabbing a piece of parchment and quill from her bag, Isabella set to write her letter, but ended up staring at the paper for what felt like hours. She had no idea where to start. An apology, obviously, but then what? Ask how his vacation was? That was three months ago and inconsequential at this point. How school was going? Stupid small talk that would seem patronizing.

_November 25, 1976_

_Garret,_

_First, I want to apologize for not responding to your letters. I wish I had a legitimate reason, but there is no way for me to justify it. I fear that you now think that I've forgotten all about you, but I promise you that is not the case. I think about you more than I'd like to admit; my homesickness seems to only be growing stronger as time passes, instead of the other way around._

_Britain and Hogwarts are great, but they pale in comparison to home. I've made a couple of good friends here, but I still feel like an outsider and don't think I'll ever fully assimilate. My accent still sounds horribly garish, and with my Dad being who he is, I get more attention that I care to receive. I would give anything to be back at Morgana where life was somewhat normal._

_But enough about me; how are you doing? I can't imagine how crazy your school schedule must be with your Quidditch responsibilities too. Congratulations, by the way, on making Captain. The girls told me in their last letter. No one else deserved it more than you._

_How are the guys doing? Chris, Tate? The girls told me in one of their earlier letters that Chris ended things with Nina. I couldn't believe it._

_Regarding Christmas, I am not sure where I'll be spending the holiday, but I think I'll be at our home here. I would love to see you if the offer still stands._

Isabella's heart clenched at the thought. Derrick was still unconscious, and the possibility of spending Christmas break at home alone with their house-elf or in the confines of the cold, dreary castle had crossed her mind for the first time today, adding to her already mounting stress.

_I understand if you don't want to see me or don't respond to me at all. I certainly took more than enough time and don't deserve your attention. But if you can find it in yourself to forgive me…_

_Anyways, I'll end it here. Good luck with your end of term exams if I don't hear from you before then, and take care._

_Yours truly,_

_Bella_

_P.S. Happy Thanksgiving! If you're home with your family, please pass along a 'hello' from Derrick and me. You can't imagine how odd it was to be at school on this day with no one realizing what it meant._

Isabella read and re-read the letter about a dozen times. She had never felt so unsure about something that should be so simple. The thought of mentioning her father's present state crossed her mind a few times, but she didn't think it appropriate to start dumping too much emotional baggage on Garret when she wasn't sure if he would even care at this point.

Finally feeling somewhat satisfied, Isabella folded the letter and was fetching for an envelope in her bedside table when she heard a muffled voice from just beyond the dormitory door.

"Watch where you're going!" the voice said irritably. The knob turned, and the door slowly opened. "Racing up and down the halls as if this were a running track, I swear; twitchy little buggers."

Isabella quickly stuffed the letter under her pillow, not wanting who she assumed was Jane to see the letter. But when the door fully opened, she was surprised to see Keira coming in.

"Wotcher!" she greeted brightly as she strode to her bed, unceremoniously plopped down, kicked off her shoes, and reclined against the pillows.

"Hi!" Isabella said, casting a quick glance at her clock. Class was not to be dismissed for another 15 minutes. "What are you doing back so early?"

"Professor Llewellyn uses the last few minutes of class to tell us what to review for star-gazing later that night, but since it's been storming…" Keira explained as she closed her eyes. "But I don't think she's realized that it's stopped snowing; I just hope the sky doesn't start to clear before or during dinner, or she could resume our practicals. I've rather liked having my free Tuesday and Thursday evenings for the past week."

"You might have just jinxed yourself," Isabella warned.

Keira shrugged her shoulders. "If it's meant to be, it's already in the stars," she said in a dramatic voice.

Isabella snorted.

"By the way," Keira began as she sat up and looked sharply at Isabella, "what was that you stuffed under your pillow as I was walking in?"

"You are way too perceptive for your own good," Isabella said scornfully, though through a smile. She grabbed the letter from its hiding place, not feeling the need to hide it from her. "It's a letter."

"To whom?"

"To Garret. I finally read his letters."

"Oooh!" Keira squealed as she stood and sat directly across from Isabella on Lily's bed. "Thinking about rekindling things?"

"Ha!" Isabella scoffed. "I'll have to get him to speak to me again first." Keira raised an eyebrow in question. "His last letter was from August and sort of dismissive, along the lines of 'this will be my last letter if I don't hear from you.'"

"Ah," Keira said, nodding. "Well, can't hurt to try."

"Yeah, that's what I figured. I hope he forgives me for ignoring him; I would love to see him over Christmas break," Isabella said as she yawned and leaned against her pillows.

"He's coming?" Keira asked.

Isabella nodded. "He'll be in Europe for most of the break and in England for two or so days." She then closed her eyes and sighed. "But who knows where I'll even be for Christmas if my dad is still—"

"Come off it! If necessary, you can come home with one of us; no way you're staying here alone for Christmas," Keira said genially.

"Thanks," Isabella said, smiling sadly and feeling lucky to have made such selfless friends.

"So I don't mean to change the subject so abruptly," Keira said a little quietly, "but you haven't known him for as long and I'd like to get a less biased opinion."

It was now Isabella's turn to sit up in alarm. Keira was biting her bottom lip and looking unsettled. Isabella was immediately intrigued.

"_Him_?" she asked with a sly smile.

"Remus," Keira said simply. "What do you think of him?"

"Remus," Isabella repeated, thinking to the boy whom she knew nearly nothing about. She explained as much. "I don't know anything about him."

"I know, but just give me your first impression."

"Well," Isabella began, wondering what this was leading to, "he's quiet, but if in a shy or brooding way, I never feel sure. He's nice, of course, and smart, I presume, but not too serious if he's good friends with Potter and Black, like a more mature version of those two. He's not exactly my type, but I can see why girls would find him attractive, tall and lean, sort of that strong and silent thing that Lily admires so much about Elias."

Keira looked skeptically. "That's a pretty thorough first impression."

Isabella laughed. "Had to be or Lana and Jasmine would have had my head. They demanded detailed descriptions of everyone in one of their earlier letters." She waved a hand dismissively. "But why do you want to know?"

"Just curious," Keira said, shrugging.

"Because…?"

"Because I think he fancies me," Keira said, blushing a little. "Actually, I am rather sure he fancies me."

"Really?"

"Yeah, you know how we can just tell sometimes?" she asked. "I mean, I've known him for over five years now, and this year is the most he's ever talked to me. I know it partly has to do with us having Ancient Runes alone now, but something has changed in the past month or so. He now makes it a point to sit next to me in class, always asks how my day is going, but with sincerity, not just small talk, inquires how I'm getting along with the material, and always offers help when I need it."

"That's all fine and well, but do you like him?"

She sighed. "I've never thought about Remus in that way, but lately I've started to look forward to seeing him, especially when we work on assignments together. He's actually pretty funny and really observant. And the stories about his, James, Sirius, and Peter's ridiculous troublemaking are unbelievable. But even after all of that, he's still such a mystery. I think that's why I am so fascinated."

"So what are you going to do?" Isabella asked, still shocked at this revelation.

"Well, he's never had a girlfriend, has only been on a few dates, and is obviously shyer than most, so I feel I would have would have to make my interest very blatant for him to make a move, if not just make the first move on my own." She then exhaled dramatically and fell onto the bed. "But I don't even know if I should bother. I've had boyfriends before, but I get bored so easily, and maybe Remus is just _too_ timid for me. Or it could be that he doesn't like me at all, and I think too much of myself."

"You could ask Lily if he ever asks about you during Prefect meetings or while they're on rounds," Isabella suggested.

Keira sat up at once. "No, don't mention it to Lily yet. She's been so caught up in Elias lately, and I don't want to involve too many people and have it blow up beyond what it really is. I guess I'll just wait and see."

Though Isabella didn't hear any jealously or irritation in Keira's tone, she was still taken aback at her wanting to keep it from Lily. She didn't have time to ponder this for too long, though, because Jane came strolling into the room just then.

"Good afternoon, ladies," she said as she reached her wardrobe. She grabbed her heavy cloak, scarf, and gloves. "Come on, get up! The boys are gathering everyone for a snowball fight outside before dinner."

"I'm in!" Keira said, the previous conversation seemingly forgotten. She looked to Isabella in question.

"Me too," Isabella said, thinking it would be good to get some fresh air and release some tension. She stuffed her letter into the envelope and placed it back under her pillow. She had wanted to get it out sooner than later, but figured waiting until after dinner wouldn't make too much of a difference at this point.

"But just be careful of the boys' snowballs," Keira said when they were sufficiently bundled up and heading downstairs five minutes later. "They usually charm them to hide slugs or dungbombs or some other foul mess in the middle that you don't realize is in there until it's in your eyes, in your hair, and up your nostrils."

Isabella frowned. "And after all that, you still find Remus 'fascinating?'" she asked in a low voice.

Keira blush and swatted her on her arm, but said nothing.

A few hours later, Isabella sat in the full and noisy common room after dinner with her roommates, all working on assignments. The pent up energy and frustration were palpable from every student. Their snowball fight had been canceled before it even began by McGonagall, who, due to new security measures that were currently being set around the grounds, forbade them to go outside and informed them that this would probably be the case for the next couple of nights until the new wards were complete.

During dinner, Isabella had planned to furtively watch Remus to determine if he was giving Keira more attention than usual, but he never showed up. In fact, she hadn't seen him since earlier today in Charms, as he was currently not in the common room. Only Peter had returned after dinner. She assumed James was with Delilah and had no idea where Sirius could be, though she vaguely hoped it was detention and not a broom closet with some unnamed girl.

As Isabella fingered through her stack of Arithmancy notes, a large barn owl tapping at the window closest to them caught her attention. She saw a fourth year girl she knew as Corrine approach the bird, and it suddenly reminded her of the letter she needed to send.

"I'll be back ladies; I need to head to the Owlery," she said as she stood.

Lily gave her an anxious look. "You want one of us to come with you?"

"No it's okay, but thanks," Isabella said graciously, knowing that Lily was thinking of the last time she went off to the Owlery alone. "I'll be fine; it's still early."

She hurried up to the dormitory, grabbed the letter, and headed out the common room. Once in the corridors, she knew she had nothing to fear; it was only a quarter to 7:00, still not yet curfew for the younger students. There was still a considerable amount of student traffic going to and from the library, the Great Hall, the common rooms, and the Owlery itself.

Once she reached the tower, Isabella entered quietly, suddenly worried that Adam might be around. She had been lucky to avoid him for another day, but wouldn't be surprised if he took to trying to follow and corner her at this point.

The room looked mercifully empty, and she was able to find Amelia quickly, who looked a little anxious to see her as she floated down from her perch. Isabella knew she probably feared that she would have to make another trip to the States.

"I know this says Garret, but don't worry," Isabella said soothingly. "Just take it down to the Owl Post Office in Hogsmeade and give it to an express owl. I want to get it there as soon as possible and know you're tired. I've put a couple of galleons in the envelope to pay for it."

Amelia hooted appreciatively before taking off through the window. Isabella watched her for a quiet minute, wondering how long it would take the express owl to deliver the letter.

"Isabella?"

She jumped and turned at the sound of her name. It was Sirius standing in the doorway, wearing a puzzled expression.

"Geez, Sirius, you scared the shit out of me!" Isabella breathed, her heart still racing.

"Sorry," he said, cracking a nervous smile. "I just wasn't expecting to see you up here."

"Just sending a letter to a friend in the states," she said, hoping that he didn't hear what she said to Amelia. She then saw that he had nothing in hand. "What are you doing up here?"

"Oh," Sirius said, looking down at his empty hands, "waiting for something to be delivered and wanted to see if it had come."

Isabella eyed him suspiciously. "Wouldn't the owl just come to you then?"

"Not necessarily," Sirius said elusively. "We, meaning me and James, have sort of trained it to deliver certain sensitive materials directly to us when no one is around or that we'll come to retrieve it ourselves."

"'Certain sensitive materials' related to troublemaking?" Isabella asked.

"Ah, you could say that," Sirius said, sounding a little distracted.

"Well then, I guess I'll be off," Isabella said as she headed towards him and the door. "Don't want you to think I'm trying to figure out all of your secrets."

"You don't have to go," Sirius said quickly, catching her arm as she passed. Isabella swallowed at his soft touch. "It will only take me a couple of minutes to check, and we can walk back together."

Isabella smiled. "Alright, I'll wait."

"Good," he said before ducking between the numerous racks of perches.

Isabella would have loved to think that he wanted her to wait because he enjoyed her company or wanted to be near her, but she knew better. He was probably thinking, like Lily had, about the last time she roamed the corridors alone, when she had been attacked by Dolohov, and didn't want to get caught up in saving her again. She wished that was not how he thought of her, as some fragile little thing that couldn't take care of herself and who needed to be looked after.

"So how are things?" came Sirius' voice from three aisles away.

"Fine," Isabella said automatically; she couldn't count how many times she had been asked this same question in the weeks since the news about her father broke in the _Prophet_. Did people really expect her to go into detail about the emotional wreck she had become?

Sirius' head suddenly appeared from behind a rack, looking doubtfully at her. "Okay, now tell me how you're really doing."

Isabella couldn't help but grin; she should have known Sirius wouldn't be so easy. "As fine as could be expected."

"And how 'fine' is that?" he asked, fully reappearing with a small scrap of paper in his hand. He only took a glance at it before crumbling it up and stuffing it into his pocket. "Not yet ready," he said to Isabella as if she knew what he was talking about.

"Uh, well, honestly," Isabella began, hesitating a little, "I don't see how I haven't completely fallen apart yet."

Sirius looked at her thoughtfully for a second. "Because falling apart is probably not in your nature."

Isabella smiled sadly. "I guess I'm doing a good job at hiding it then."

"And what exactly are you hiding?" Sirius asked with some amusement in his voice. He started heading out the Owlery.

"I don't know; I guess everything," Isabella said with a shrug as she followed him onto the stairwell.

Sirius raised an eyebrow in question. It baffled her how he seemed interested, whether genuine or not, about her problems. She thought he'd be sick of her by now.

"Uh, well, I've never felt so alone before," she nearly whispered. She saw him nod out of the corner of her eye and went on. "My father is incapacitated, and I can't visit him. My only family here is who knows where with no desire to have any type of relationship."

"Maybe losing contact with your mother's family is for the best," Sirius said with some caution. "I mean, why try so hard to be part of someone's life when it is clear they want nothing to do with you. And I'm sure it's nothing personal toward you, but you are a spitting image of your mother, right? Maybe you remind them too much of your mother, and it still hurts."

Isabella knew where Sirius was coming from, but it still didn't make sense to her. Regardless of how much she resembled her mother, this was the time to come together and grieve, not push people away.

"I guess," she said, though with no conviction. "And everything just circles through my head, all day. It's nonstop. Sometimes I'll be fine, but it'll hit me out of nowhere, and I'm amazed that I made it through class without bursting into tears," she said in a rush, finally letting it out for the first time and immediately feeling foolish. She felt the blood rush to her cheeks as they came to the end of a long hall with a spiral staircase.

It was then she looked around and realized that they had not returned to the common room. She in fact had no idea where they were or who had been leading who, but without thinking she began to climb the staircase and heard Sirius follow her just a step below.

Isabella suddenly realized that this was the first time she and Sirius had been alone together since they're day in Hogsmeade, a day she had replayed in her mind hundreds, if not thousands, of times, overanalyzing her words, her gestures, the initial request for him to take her. Despite him still talking to her afterward, she had decided that she came off as so needy, so demanding, and so delicate, and that he was probably being polite to her now only because she was a 'new girl.' She had enjoyed the day, but she was embarrassed by it all.

"It is a lot to take on," Sirius said after a moment, distracting her from her thoughts. "Have you ever thought about asking to take a leave or for a lighter load?"

"No, I wouldn't think it fair," Isabella said. "I'm not some special case. We're in the middle of a war, and there are plenty of people out there and in this school who are dealing with the same, if not more than me." She then looked back at him. "I mean, look at you. It may have been under different circumstances, but you've lost most of your family as well, and you seem to be holding up."

Sirius looked appalled for a moment but quickly composed himself. "That's only because I was lucky to find a true family in the Potters, and I didn't have to deal with the death of a parent and the near-death of the other. And like you said, in the general sense, you're very much alone, but it should get easier as you find your place here. It'll just take some time."

"Time," Isabella repeated with exasperation. It was a word she was sick of hearing. That's all anyone had told her: it would take time to find peace after her mother's death, to accept the move to England, to find her place in Hogwarts, and now time for her father to heal. She was tired of waiting; she wanted to fall asleep and wakeup only when enough time had passed for her to heal from all these issues.

Still lost in thought, Isabella came to the top of the staircase, where a heavy wood door stood. She looked back at Sirius who only shrugged. With a low grunt, she grabbed the knob and forced the door open. A gust of freezing air rushed past them, and Isabella was surprised to find a rather large tower, empty save for a thick carpet of snow and about thirty instruments she suspected were telescopes under large leather hides big enough to cover a centaur.

Without knowing what compelled her, she continued toward the center of the tower. With no cloak, gloves, or scarf, she knew she would be shivering in a few minutes, but for now the cold air felt invigorating and refreshing. With Herbology classes conducted inside during the past week, it was the first time she had properly been outside. She wanted to enjoy it, if only for a little while.

She walked toward the parapet and shimmied her way between two telescopes. The storm clouds had cleared, revealing a million twinkling lights against the inky dark sky. She looked down at the still grounds, admiring how the pristine, white blanket of snow and frozen lake glittered luminously under the light of the full moon. It was breathtaking.

"Where are we?" she asked absently.

"The Astromony Tower," Sirius replied.

Isabella noticed a bit of humor in his voice and turned around. He was smirking slightly, and she raised an eyebrow.

"The telescopes didn't give it away?" he asked, gesturing at them.

"It could simply be a storage area," Isabella said defensively.

"True," Sirius said, still smirking. "Aren't you cold?"

Isabella shook her head as she took a seat on one of the telescope's stools. "Not yet. It feels good, relaxing."

Sirius nodded as he took a seat a few spots away for her. "This could be a place for you to come, then. You know, to clear your mind. It's usually empty during most of the day."

"If only I knew how to get here," Isabella said. "I wasn't really paying attention to where we were going."

"Ah," he said, grinning again. "I thought as much."

"Then why didn't you stop me?"

Sirius shrugged. "You seemed like you were on a mission."

Isabella scoffed. "You mean I wouldn't shut up long enough for you to tell me otherwise."

"You said it, not me," Sirius said with a chuckle.

"Well, thanks for listening to it all," she said, blushing a little. "I think it hit me harder today because it's Thanksgiving, start of the holiday season, the first without my mom." She stopped suddenly as her throat constricted a bit.

"Whats-giving?" Sirius asked, his face scrunched in confusion.

Isabella laughed a little. "Thanksgiving," she corrected him. "It's an American holiday celebrated the fourth Thursday in November. It's a day to show gratitude for your family, friends, health, whatever else. You enjoy a big turkey dinner with all the most delicious and fattening fixings and a relaxing four day weekend."

"Sounds glorious. Wonder why we don't celebrate it over here," Sirius said.

"For good reason," Isabella said with a smile. "It sort of began as a celebration among the Pilgrims for surviving the first few brutal years after escaping from Britain and the friendship and help they received from the Native Americans."

"Ah, so along the same reasons we don't celebrate the Fourth of July here," Sirius said.

"Exactly," Isabella said nodding, trying to quell the pang she felt at the thought of her last Fourth.

She sighed and shivered as the late evening chill finally reached her bones. Closing her eyes, she breathed in deeply, truly feeling better. She had always been the type who needed to talk through her issues; she just didn't think Sirius would be on the receiving end most of the time.

She opened her eyes and looked plainly at him. He seemed to have been watching her, his expression one of mild curiosity. She scrutinized his face, not caring that she was obviously staring at him. He was so very handsome, almost impossibly so. She couldn't decide if she was just infatuated with him or genuinely enjoyed his company.

_Can't it be both?_ Isabella wondered. She felt a smile creep across her lips at the thought of any of his admirers, especially Jane, knowing that she was alone with him on the Astronomy Tower, and it not being the first time they had shared a private conversation.

"What?"

"Huh?" Isabella said, startled out of her trance.

"What's got you smiling?"

"Oh!" Isabella said, shaking her head and looking away. She felt her cheeks burn once again. "Nothing, just thinking."

"But it's got you sincerely smiling, which I haven't seen in a while," Sirius said. He reached out to touch her arm and draw her attention again. "What is it?"

Isabella glanced back at him, now trying not to smile so much. "It's noth—"

A loud squawk interrupted her, causing her to jump slightly. They both looked around frantically until her eyes found the source. A large, red and gold bird appeared from over the parapet. It beat its wings and hovered in place for a second before gliding toward them.

"Fawkes?" Sirius said, the confusion in his voice mirroring that in Isabella's mind, but then everything clicked as the phoenix landed on the stool to her right.

_Dumbledore's bird_? Isabella thought. Fawkes squawked softly as he outstretched his right leg, and it was then she saw the scroll attached to it.

Isabella's heart began to race at once, already knowing it concerned her father. She untied the scroll with unsteady hands and nearly ripped it in her haste to unroll it.

_Ms. Williams,_

_Please report to my office as soon as your studies for the night allow it._

_Sincerely,_

_Headmaster Dumbledore_

_P.S. I am still quite partial to Ice Mice._

The austerity of the letter frustrated Isabella, but she knew Dumbledore would never go into details about her father's status in case it fell into the wrong hands, even within the school.

"What is it?" Sirius asked, this time the anxiety in his voice echoing that which coursed through her.

"It's from Dumbledore; I think it's about my father," Isabella said, standing and straightening her uniform.

Sirius' eyes widened in surprise. "Does he usually send Fawkes?"

"No. Whenever he needs to give me an update, it usually is McGonagall passing along the message for me to see him after meals or class," Isabella explained as she headed towards the door to the stairwell.

"So then this must be urgent," Sirius said as he followed her.

"And that could be either good or bad," Isabella said, trying to prepare herself for any type of news. She reached the door but faltered. She wasn't sure how to get the Headmaster's office from here, and beyond that, though she wasn't sure what time it was, she knew it was well past 7:00 now. She didn't want to travel through the school alone.

"Sirius, would you mind walking with me to Dumbledore's office?"

"Uh," Sirius said, hesitating a little. He glanced up at the sky before meeting Isabella's eyes. "Sure," he said, "but let's make it quick."

Sirius opened the door and hastily led Isabella down the stairs and through the corridors. They walked for about a minute before Isabella gained her bearings. Maybe now she would be able to find the Astronomy Tower on her own, but she wouldn't mind pretending she couldn't find it if it meant Sirius would accompany her.

But the possibility alone time with Sirius immediately left her mind as they turned down the hall that she knew was home to the gargoyle that guarded the Headmaster's office. They had luckily ran into only a few students who she knew only by name. A couple of them gave she and Sirius curious glances, and she hoped no new rumors surfaced about them tomorrow.

They finally reached the lone gargoyle, and Isabella thought her chest might explode from the intensity and frequency of her heartbeat. She turned to face Sirius whose expression she could not ascertain.

"Thank you," she said in a quiet voice, feeling shy of all a sudden and not able to meet his eyes.

"Think nothing of it," he replied, his voice smooth. "I hope it's good news you get up there."

"Thanks," she said again. "I'll see you in Arithmancy tomorrow. Good luck studying."

"Studying?" he asked, his voice full of genuine confusion.

"For our quiz."

"Oh, yeah, that," he said, distracted. He began retreating and grinned. "Don't think I'll get much of that done tonight. Goodnight, Isabella," he said before turning his back fully to her.

"Goodnight," she replied wondering what he was getting into tonight. She then shook her head and faced the gargoyle. "Ice Mice," she said in a clear voice.

Without a word, the gargoyle sprang aside. Isabella looked back down the corridor before stepping on the moving staircase. Sirius was already gone.

In a few quiet seconds, Isabella was standing in front of the office door. She knocked and waited. There was the sound of shuffling papers and hushed voices before she heard Dumbledore say, "Enter!"

The door opened of its own accord and Isabella found Dumbledore standing behind his desk. His eyes grew at the sight of his guest.

"Isabella," he said with surprise. "I beg your pardon, Ms. Williams, I wasn't expecting you here so soon after sending Fawkes off for a third time. He had trouble finding you—you weren't in your common room, the library, or the Great Hall."

"Oh, I didn't realize he had been searching," Isabella said, slightly nervous. "I was on the Astronomy Tower."

"The Astronomy Tower?" Dumbledore repeated with some amusement. "I wasn't aware that Astronomy practicals had resumed, or that you were in Astronomy in the first place."

Isabella wasn't sure where this was going. "They weren't, and I'm not."

"Ah, well, it is the best place for stargazing on a clear night," Dumbledore said with an inflection that made Isabella blush some.

"Yes, stargazing," Isabella said in a small voice. She couldn't shake the feeling that Dumbledore knew Sirius had been with her and hoped he wasn't assuming anything. Not wanting him to continue his questioning, she immediately said, "But I rushed her presuming you had news of my father." She swallowed hard. "Do you?"

"Yes," Dumbledore said simply, but he did not elaborate.

Instead, he walked to a door near his fireplace. He opened it, reached inside, and came back with two large lumps of fabric. He handed one to Isabella, and at once she realized it was a traveling cloak. Her throat immediately constricted, still unsure if this meant good or bad news.

"Yes," he repeated as he wrapped his own cloak around him. He then looked at her and smiled sincerely. "He has awakened. Put on that cloak; let us go."


	10. Anticipation, Infatuation, Retaliation

Isabella's brain was still in a fog. In fact, she had no idea how she was moving. If it weren't for knowing that at the end of this journey, however long it ended up being, she would get to see her father, she was sure she would not have had the mental capacity to put one foot in front of the other.

The last twenty minutes had been a blur. She only absently remembered wrapping the proffered cloak around her, Dumbledore casting a disillusionment charm on her in case anyone saw him as he left the castle, the long, cold walk down to the entrance of the grounds as Dumbledore silently vanished her footprints in the snow, and the uncomfortable Side-Along Apparation the second they were only steps outside the front gate.

They had landed in the middle of a dark forest, whose canopy was so high and dense that the ground was nearly free from any snow, and she would not have known if it were day or night had they not had just left Hogwarts under a starry sky.

The surroundings scared her a bit. It was completely silent, save for the low mutterings from Dumbledore as he deactivated each security ward causing the air to vibrate around them. The only light was from their lit wands extended before them.

After another ten minutes of silent walking, Dumbledore finally stopped. Isabella did the same and looked around them. There was no sign of any building, cave, or other dwelling that could have housed anyone, just endless trees and darkness. Dumbledore turned to Isabella and removed the disillusionment charm.

"You are aware, Ms. Williams, of the basic workings of the Fidelius charm?" he asked, his voice low but clear.

"Yes, professor," she answered quickly. Her father had actually toyed with the idea of casting the charm on their new house when they first arrived in London but decided that it was unnecessary for the time being.

Dumbledore nodded. "Then you know that what I am about to tell you, you must see in your mind as you say it, and that it is highly classified information that I ask you share with no one—not your friends here or abroad, professors, or anyone else in- or outside the school. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sir," Isabella said, again with urgency.

"May I have your word?"

"My word, professor."

"Good," he said before clearing his throat. He then looked her squarely in the eyes. "The medical facility for members of the Order of the Phoenix is located at latitude 56 longitude -5 in the Argyll Forest of Scotland."

Isabella nodded once and closed her eyes, repeating the words in her head and trying not to concern herself with what the Order of the Phoenix was or how far out they really must be if this location could only be given via geographical coordinates.

She opened her eyes and looked ahead of her. As she continued to silently mouth the words, a section of a building appeared about 25 feet in front of them. It appeared to be only one story and extended outward, as if spreading from its center. Isabella watched transfixed as the trees surrounding the growing building moved with it but remained undisturbed.

After another minute, the building stopped expanding. It was a bare, grey cement building that looked no larger than a typical corner market. There were no windows and no doors.

"Do you see the building?" Dumbledore asked.

"Yes, sir."

"Good," he said, clapping his hands. "Just one more note: I promised I would bring you here as soon as your father awoke, and I have stayed true to my word, but you being here is still frowned upon. The people housed within this facility are deeply involved in the fight against Voldemort and his Death Eaters, with a number of them doing so in secret. I was able to secure agreement for you to come here only because of who your father is. Your meeting will be brief, and I again must ask that you relay nothing you see here to anyone else. You may tell your friends that you have seen your father, but you are to tell them you visited him at your home in London. Is this understood?"

Isabella swallowed hard. "Yes, professor. You have my word."

Dumbledore smiled warmly. "Sorry for the ominous lecture, but it is necessary. Now, let's get you to your father."

Isabella wanted to smile but couldn't work her mouth. She was more anxious than excited at the prospect of seeing him.

They walked toward the building, Isabella one step behind Dumbledore. Once they reached it, he raised a hand to a non-distinct area and muttered another incantation. The frame of a door glowed before solidly forming, though with no handle. He then turned to Isabella and extended an arm for her to proceed first. Not really knowing what to do, she took a step into the door, and she passed right through it as if it didn't exist, much like the brick barrier between platforms nine and ten at Kings Cross.

Once through the door, Isabella found herself in a bright, quiet, and small space. Three or four halls led off in all directions, windows lined the walls through which simulated sunshine beamed, and bare white linoleum made up the floors. There were no paintings, no plants, no decorative pieces of any kind. It had all the sterility and austerity of any hospital or scientific lab.

"We are this way," Dumbledore said, extending his arm down a corridor to their left.

Isabella followed Dumbledore down the short hall that had no doors. She was surprised at how quiet their footsteps were. The Headmaster stopped at a random blank space and repeated his actions from outside. He placed a hand on the wall and mumbled. Another door appeared, and Dumbledore stepped through first this time. Isabella held her breath as she followed. She was shocked at the contrast between the room and the hall she had just left.

It was a well-sized room, probably the size of her dormitory at Hogwarts. Dark wood lined the floors and walls while the windows were surrounded with lush navy draperies. There were about 6 other people in the room: two Aurors, two in what she knew as Healer robes, and another two whose role she did not know. They only glanced at her and Dumbledore before returning to their respective tasks.

Her eyes finally found her father, who was sitting up on a comfortable looking bed and reading reports. He had not noticed them enter.

_Typical_, she thought with a half smile.

Dumbledore cleared his throat. "Derrick?"

He looked up, and his eyes immediately found Isabella. His face broke into a large grin before reaching his arms out. A few seconds passed before Isabella realized she was running toward him, her arms outstretched too.

"Daddy," she whispered once she reached him. She wrapped her arms around him and crushed herself to him, burying her head in his chest and sobbing uncontrollably as overwhelming, consuming relief flowed through her.

"Bella, dear," Derrick said, his own voice breaking a little. "It's alright; I'm here."

She nodded into his chest but continued to cry. She had to make certain that he was here, alive, whole, and safe.

A few minutes passed before Isabella calmed down. She gained control of her breathing and finally rose up to get a good look at her father. There were tears glimmering in his eyes, but she was slightly unsettled to see that he otherwise looked perfectly healthy. There were a few more grey hairs on his head, but aside from that, he looked as if he had just woken up from an afternoon nap.

"Hello," he said, grinning.

"Hi," she greeted in a small voice. She glanced around to see that the others, including Dumbledore, had respectfully left the room.

"How are you?"

"Okay," Isabella said, her voice still quiet and week. "But much better now."

Derrick nodded. "I supposed the past month has been a little rough."

"A little," she said, cracking a half smile. "How are _you_ feeling? I mean, does anything hurt?"

"Nope, nothing. I feel as fit as I ever had," he explained. "It's quite odd. I've been looking over all the reports from the tests they ran on me while I was unconscious, and there isn't anything out of the ordinary with them. No one has any idea what curse I was hit with or how it kept me out for so long."

"Do you think it was something they created, the Death Eaters? Like the Dark Mark?" Isabella whispered.

"No doubt it is, but it must have not been perfected if it had no serious effect on me." He then rolled up the sleeves of the shirt he as wearing. There were fading bruises and burns. "These injuries were from normal dueling, the usual curses."

"Then how did you wake up?"

Derrick shrugged. "Couldn't tell you. They're still working on it, but I doubt they come up with an answer anytime soon. But what matters now is that I am awake," he said, scooting over and patting the space next to him. Isabella joined him on the bed. "Let the Healers worry about the details. Tell me how you've been."

Isabella smiled and discussed a little about class, her friends, and the happenings over the past month, deliberately leaving out her clandestine trip to Hogsmeade and everything about Sirius.

"So keeping busy, in short?"

"As always," she sighed. She was comfortable here with her dad and was already dreading the time when she would have to leave.

"And if I have my dates correct, Happy Thanksgiving," he said, giving her a kiss on her temple. "Weird, isn't it?"

"Very," Isabella said. "Remember last year and mom's first failed attempt to host dinner? Who knew you could do so much damage to a turkey with a couple of random twirls of a wand."

Derrick chuckled slightly. "Thank goodness your grandmother was there to save the day. Your mother was never good with cooking or domestic spells. I don't know what compelled her to start with a task as large as Thanksgiving dinner."

Isabella grinned at the thought of Estelle mistakenly reanimating the headless, de-feathered turkey and it scurrying throughout the house. But the thoughts of her mother didn't sadden her like before; it felt good to reminisce about the happy times.

"And speaking of the holidays," Derrick said as he reached for a piece of parchment on the table next to him that was laden with letters and reports, "I just read a letter from Allen."

"Garret's dad?"

Derrick nodded. "Yes, apparently he and the family are visiting Europe during Christmas. They'll be here for a couple of days before New Year's Eve. I was thinking of having them over for dinner one night."

The look her father was giving her flustered her a little. "That sounds fine. Garret actually wrote me saying the same thing."

"Oh, so you've been writing each other?" Derrick asked, a faint grin at his lips.

"A little," Isabella said quickly. She felt her cheeks burn slightly.

"Good, good," Derrick said absently. "It will be nice to see some friends from home."

Just then Dumbledore walked back into the room. "I apologize for interrupting, but it is time to go, Ms. Williams."

"Yes, professor," Isabella said, her voice growing tight. She reluctantly got out of bed and turned back to Derrick. Tears immediately welled in her eyes. She could have stayed with her father all night; she just felt safer around him. She was afraid to leave his side.

"I know, it seems unfair that our time is so short," Derrick said as if reading her mind. He grabbed her hand and squeezed it. "But you have to get back to school and continue on as if things are normal, and I need to get back to work—"

"Back to work?" Isabella interrupted.

"Yes," he said placatingly, knowing his daughter was heating up. "I am feeling quite fine, a little baffled at the whole thing, but completely sound in mind and body. There is still a ton of work to do. I may have been out for a month, but Voldemort and his Death Eaters were still working. This is not the time to take a break."

"But—"

"And I promise to not overwork myself," Derrick said. "I will write you everyday, you will be home before you know it for the holidays, and we'll decorate and bake and do whatever you want."

Isabella sighed and nodded. "Okay. Just make sure to rest please."

"I will," Derrick said, grinning. He pulled her toward him and kissed her on the forehead. "Good luck with your end of term exams and sleep well. I love you."

"Love you too, daddy," Isabella said softly. "Goodnight." It took a great deal of effort to turn and walk away.

_Just one more month, just one more month, _Isabella thought, relieved to just have her dad back well and whole.

She reached Dumbledore slowly, who smiled at her. He then looked over her head to her father.

"Until tomorrow, Derrick," he said, inclining his head.

"Goodnight, Albus. And thank you."

Dumbledore nodded again. Isabella looked back waved. Derrick winked at her and returned to his report as she turned and walked through the door into the white, silent corridor.

The trip back to Hogwarts zoomed by this time. Dumbledore engaged her in polite conversation about how she was enjoying school so far—the dormitory, the house system, classes, and her friends. Of course Isabella replied that everything was satisfactory and that her transition had been going well, which for the most part, she realized, was true.

Once back in the castle, Dumbledore bade her goodnight in the Entrance Hall. She had a feeling that he had no intention of returning to his office, but to the facility they had just left. Isabella reached the common room quickly and was relieved to not have run into anyone. It being after 11:00, there weren't many people still downstairs. Only two seventh year boys and one girl were studying.

Isabella wasn't tired at all. She headed over to the girls' usual spot and saw that her bag still remained. It seemed hours ago that she was studying with her roommates. They had probably wondered where she had run off to and knew they were most likely still awake upstairs, but she refrained from going to the room, knowing they would ask a multitude of questions. She was planning on sharing the details of her trip but not now; she needed to finish reviewing her Arithmancy work.

Isabella gathered her notes and settled into an armchair. Her mind worked slowly as she looked over her notes and problem sets; she could not stop thinking about her father, Garret, and Sirius. She was comforted at the thought of her father feeling like his old self, though she was not too thrilled with him returning to work so soon. However, she would not have expected anything less.

Garret had become a complicated situation in such a short time. She had gone from hoping he wouldn't trash her letter as soon as he received it to her father inviting him and his family for dinner in just a month's time, regardless of whether or not he wanted to be there. It had the possibility of being the most awkward night of her life.

Isabella didn't know what to think about Sirius. There were times when she thought that _maybe_ there could be _something_ developing, but that was always squashed with a distraction, like tonight, or a bitter dose of reality courtesy of Jane. She was just kidding herself; she was no better or different than his other countless admirers.

"Can Tuli get Miss anything?"

Isabella jumped at the squeaky voice. She looked up from her notes and saw that she was now alone in the common room, save for a tiny house-elf dressed in a navy blue toga-like garment. Her protuberant blue eyes were the size of tennis balls.

"I apologize for scaring Miss," Tuli said with a slight bow. "Students are usually in bed this late."

"That—that's okay—Tuli, you said your name was?" Isabella said once she had calmed down.

Tuli nodded. "Yes, Miss. We house-elves tidy up the common rooms during this time. But no need to leave on our account, Miss!" Tuli added hastily when Isabella started to rise. "I can clean around you or come back later. But is there anything I can do for you?"

"Uh," Isabella said, still a little shocked. She looked toward the dying fire. "A new fire would be pleasant, if you don't mind." She then glanced down at her work and saw she had not made much progress. She was going to be up for a while. "And some coffee, if that's not too much trouble."

"No trouble at all, Miss…?"

"Isabella."

"Miss Isabella, yes, I will relight the fire and bring you some coffee."

"Thank y—" Isabella began to say, but Tuli had already snapped her fingers and disappeared.

Shaking her head, Isabella stood and stretched. She fell heavily back onto the chair just as the creaking of the portrait caught her attention.

"James?" Isabella said when he finally came through the hole.

"Oh, hey Isabella," James greeted.

She immediately noticed that his hair was messier than usual and his clothes were rumpled. However, he did not look tired; rather, he seemed quite alert.

"What are you doing up so late?" he asked as he reached her.

"Finishing up some Arithmancy work."

"This late?"

"Yeah, we have a quiz tomorrow, and I got a little distracted tonight," she said.

He raised an eyebrow.

"My father woke up earlier today. I returned a little while ago from seeing him; Dumbledore took me," she explained.

"That's great news!" James beamed, and his smile was infectious. "I bet you're relieved, and my father too," he added.

"You have no idea," Isabella sighed. "What are you doing out so late?"

"Had to make sure Delilah got back safe," he said with a slight smirk.

Isabella grinned knowingly. "What a gentlemanly thing to do. And here I was thinking you were out making trouble."

"Not yet; that's next on the agenda tonight," James said.

"You mean you're not turning in?"

James shook his head. "No, just came back for a change of clothes. But it's pointless now that I think about it. I am already running late; the guys will be right chuffed with me."

"Aren't you afraid of being caught?"

"Nah. As long as we've been doing this, if we were to be caught, it's because we wanted to be," he said with a wink as he started retreating toward the portrait hole.

"Well, good luck," was all Isabella could think to say, though knowing it was rather unnecessary.

"Thanks, and you too. With the Arithmancy, I mean," he said, inclining his head toward her notes. "Though if what Sirius says is true, you won't need it. Goodnight." And with one last grin, he was gone.

_What had Sirius said?_ she silently asked herself. She could not stop grinning. Sirius had talked about her to his friends; well, to James at least. And had complimented her…or her proficiency in Arithmancy at any rate. Had he said anything more?

"Oh, you're getting ahead of yourself," she whispered, but she still could not help smiling and wondering. Not even the loud reappearance of Tuli only seconds later startled her.

She accepted the coffee tray, thanked Tuli, and settled in again to study. But if she thought she was preoccupied before, she was mistaken. Sirius remained at the forefront of her mind for the rest of the night, but this time, he was a welcomed distraction.

* * *

The quiz could have been written in Gobbledegook for all Sirius knew; nothing was making sense.

And it was just silly. Arithmancy was not difficult for him; he had aced every exam since he began the class back in third year, and had even received an Outstanding on his O.W.L. He knew the material being tested today, but he couldn't make sense of anything written on the paper at this moment. His brain had turned to mush.

He wouldn't have minded so much had he not also had a splitting headache. In fact, his entire body was in pain—full, throbbing pain—and it was all thanks to Moony the werewolf.

It had been about a year since they had mastered transforming into Animagi, and although each monthly excursion with Remus in werewolf form presented new adventures and discoveries, the whole event had become mostly second nature to them all.

However, last night had been a particularly nasty transformation. Remus was in an inexplicable rage for most of the night, which worried Sirius from the minute he entered the Shrieking Shack, as he had not witnessed Remus act so _primal_ since their first few transformations with him.

James had been late in meeting him and Peter _again_, and Peter in rat form was basically useless in helping control Remus, so the responsibility of restraining Remus fell onto Sirius until James finally decided to show up. As a result, he had been the victim of numerous full body rammings from the furious werewolf.

The sun was just beginning to rise by the time they had finally subdued him, giving them just enough time to escape back to the castle before Remus was expected back in the Hospital Wing for the day. James and Peter, both free of injury, had passed out the minute they reached their dormitory. Sirius, on the other hand, was too bruised and battered to comfortably fall asleep.

In a last ditched effort, he downed the remaining one-third of James' last bottle of vodka to dull the pain away. He had slept right through breakfast and half of Transfiguration, which resulted in a Saturday night detention from a disgruntled McGonagall. James and Peter had smirked at him when he joined them at their desk.

_Fucking tossers_, Sirius thought savagely. He was angry with the both of them, and Remus too. Peter for being absolutely useless, Remus for being so angry for no damn reason, and James for being so wrapped up over some girl. Sirius didn't care if James had a girlfriend—he was downright happy for anything that ended his futile obsession over Evans—but when that girl started to take precedence over his mates, especially over something as important as Remus' 'furry little problem,' something was not right. He almost wished James were still pining for Evans; at least then he wouldn't be absent so frequently.

Making it to Arithmancy had been damn near impossible. The effects of the vodka had long worn off during Transfiguration, and the walk from McGonagall's classroom had been the most strenuous and painful ever. Professor Thorpe had just finished distributing the quiz by the time Sirius slid into his seat next to Isabella. The latter said nothing but had given him a wary look before turning back to her parchment.

Isabella was another source of his frustration, though indirectly. She had been asleep in an uncomfortable looking position in an armchair when the boys returned to the common room this morning. Sirius had wanted to wake her up and help her up to her room, but James stopped him, explaining that he looked a mess with his swollen bottom lip, black eye, and tattered clothes. It would have led to awkward questioning.

Sirius had since cleaned up as best he could, but he still wondered at why Isabella had been up so late by herself. Studying for Arithmancy, obviously, but that meant she had been out later than he thought.

_But doing what?_ Sirius thought. _Talking with Dumbledore about her father?_ Possibly. _Wandering around with the girls?_ Most likely not. _Out with a boy—Adam possibly?_ Maybe, though the thought irritated him slightly. Or perhaps she had not been out late, but was waiting for Sirius to come back from whatever she thought he was doing—to review the material, of course. This made him smile a little, but then he immediately scowled. Why should he care if Isabella was waiting for him?

He glanced at her. She did look tired—her eyes were puffy, her uniform was not as neat, and she kept stretching her back as if it were stiff. But despite it all, she seemed happy, or at least, less stressed. Sirius had noticed it during Transfiguration—her easy smile and increased chattiness with the girls. He assumed it had to do with whatever news she received from Dumbledore regarding her father; he would ask her about it after class.

Trying to focus again, Sirius looked back down at his quiz. The equations had become a bit clearer now. He began to work, and gradually most of it came back to him as he proceeded. He finished only a few minutes after Isabella did.

Class ended with a lecture on a new unit, to which few people paid attention. When the bell finally rang, Sirius gingerly stood and waited outside for Isabella, who had gone to Professor Thorpe to, Sirius assumed, ask questions about the new material. She was the last to leave the classroom and appeared pleased to see him waiting for her. They began walking toward the main staircase.

"Hi," she greeted in a cheerful tone he was sure he had never heard from her. "Are you feeling okay?"

Sirius was a little taken aback at the question. "Sure, why?"

Isabella shrugged. "You just look a little rough, like you didn't sleep a wink," she said hesitantly. "You didn't make it to breakfast and almost missed Transfiguration."

So she had noticed. "Yeah, but I am fine. It's the price you pay for staying out late."

"Making trouble?"

Sirius smirked. "Would you expect anything less?"

"I wouldn't know what to expect; I've only known you for, what, 3 months now?" Isabella asked. Sirius couldn't place her tone.

"True, but I am easy to learn."

Isabella mumbled something that Sirius didn't catch, though he knew it was contradictory. He tried to ignore this.

"So was it good news from Dumbledore last night?" he asked suddenly.

"Yes!" Isabella said, perking up right away. "My father is awake. He took me to our home in London to visit him."

Sirius felt truly relieved for her. "Very good to hear. But I bet if he is anything like James' father, he already went back to work today."

Isabella bristled. "He was already working when I showed up _last night_. He looks fine and claims he feels fine, but I still think he should take a breather for a few days."

"Maybe, but then again, I bet Voldemort doesn't take many breaks either."

"That's exactly what my father said," Isabella said, frowning at him.

Sirius grinned. "Great minds think alike."

She rolled her eyes but smiled all the same.

"And here is where I leave you," Sirius said as they reached the main staircase. It was lunch time and no doubt Isabella would be making her way to the Great Hall to join her friends.

"You're not coming to lunch?"

"No, not really hungry. And you were right, I got hardly any sleep last night. Going to use the time to catch a nap," Sirius explained.

"Well, just make sure you're up in time for Potions," Isabella said as she started downstairs.

"Ah, old Sluggy won't miss me for a day."

Isabella raised an eyebrow, but Sirius only smirked and continued in the other direction.

He had quite the time forcing his away against the rush of students heading to lunch. A few Slytherins purposely rammed into him, but instead of following instinct and drawing out his wand, he continued onto the common room. Sleep and maybe some firewhiskey were his main priority right now.

To no surprise, the common room was empty, but their room wasn't. Remus was lying on his bed and reading his Ancient Runes textbook.

"Hey, Moony," Sirius said, rather indifferently, as he walked toward his bed. "What are you doing back so early?"

"Couldn't stand being in the Hospital Wing for another minute," Remus said, and Sirius heard resentment in his voice.

"Oh," Sirius said lamely as he stripped down to his boxers and undershirt and fell into bed.

"And I ran into James on the way back. He told me about last night, and I'm sorry," Remus said faintly after a moment.

Sirius, unsettled at the sound of his voice, glanced over at Remus. The latter had put down his book, sat up to face Sirius' bed, and looked utterly dejected. Sirius' anger toward him dissipated at once. Remus had been completely unaware of what he was doing last night. Sirius knew the attacks were not intentional; they never were.

"Don't worry about it," Sirius said dismissively.

"No, I should," Remus said defiantly. "I haven't acted like that since—since last fall. I should have better control."

"Better control?" Sirius asked, chuckling a little. He desisted when Remus did not look amused. "Really, Moony. You are not in your right mind when you transform. No one expects you to act like Remus the Prefect during the full moon. Animal instinct will sometimes take over whether you want it to or not; you are being too hard on yourself."

"That's not an excuse," Remus said, shaking his head.

"Of course it isn't; no one is making excuses because there are no reasons for them. It just _is what it is_," Sirius said, worried that none of what he was saying was getting through to Remus. Sirius had never seen him so distressed before. He frowned. "Is everything okay?"

"Fine," Remus replied moodily.

Sirius wasn't bothered by the curt response; he had been expecting it. He and Remus were good friends, but the four of them knew that Remus' closest friendship was with James. Sirius' penchant for recklessness beyond the normal rule-breaking and Remus' increasing apathy for it all had culminated in a more strained relationship over the past year, and he knew that he was the last one Remus would ever open up to, even behind Peter.

But Sirius still had to try. Remus was despondent, and more so than usual. Something was definitely wrong.

"Don't give me that shit," Sirius said. "Something is very obviously bothering you enough to affect your mood during a transformation. You don't want to tell me? That's fine. But you're going to need to work through it before next month, or I won't be around to take the brunt of it."

Remus glared at him, and Sirius smiled inwardly with satisfaction. He was lying of course; only capture or death could prevent him from keeping Remus company during the full moon, but he knew his words had affected his friend. Remus hated being a burden on anyone.

Remus remained silent and stared grumpily at the floor. Thinking he was fighting a losing battle for now, Sirius rolled over to face the opposite wall and try to get some sleep in.

"I'm just sick of it!" Remus bellowed after nearly five minutes of silence, and Sirius sat up with a start. Remus was angrily pacing around the room.

"I am sick of it being such a burden on all aspects of my life! My academics, my health, my friendships, my—my…" He trailed off, closed his eyes, and turned away.

Sirius had a feeling the last unspoken thought pertained to girls. He didn't know what to say.

Remus sat heavily upon his bed again, his head in his hands. "I just want a regular teenage life; it comes so easily for everyone else, for you and James," he mumbled. "You guys choose to do this every month; but I have to endure it for the rest of my life, and the thought of that becomes overwhelming sometimes." His voice broke, and he looked up at Sirius. He wasn't crying, but he was slightly shaking and paler than ever, which was saying something considering what day it was.

Sirius stared at him, completely loss at what to do. Remus was clearly breaking down, and Sirius didn't know if he was supposed to say something to console him or to remain quiet and let Remus get everything out.

The thing was, though, that Remus could never be consoled, especially regarding his lycanthropy. He had never wanted anyone's pity for his fate, but it was difficult to remain unaffected when he lost control and cracked under the pressure. Sirius had witnessed this only one time before—back in third year. He, James, and Peter, not knowing what to do, took him to the Hospital Wing where he was given a number of calming potions.

But it wouldn't be so easy this time. They were older and better aware of their needs as individuals now. And Remus, who had grown increasingly isolated, needed someone he could relate to. Since finding and befriending another werewolf while in school was essentially impossible, he needed someone to lose himself in. A positive distraction that would keep him so deliriously happy and at ease that by the time the full moon arrived, he wouldn't become so depressed about the situation.

He needed a girlfriend—something Sirius and James had thought for a while. But Sirius had believed that no girl in Hogwarts would be accepting of his condition when he eventually had to tell her, and he still held that belief today.

And as soon as it had started, Remus' outburst was over. Sirius watched as he lied back down on his bed and closed his curtains halfway. He understood that Remus did not want any comforting words from him and that they would not speak of this event ever again, between them at least. Sirius had all intention to discuss this with James, whenever he decided to spare a moment away from Delilah, that is.

But for now, Sirius would worry about nothing but himself. He turned away from Remus and closed his bed hangings, knowing he was never going to make it to Potions.

* * *

"Stop, just stop!" James yelled. He sighed as he watched his two other Chasers continue down the field toward the Keeper in a wild formation.

Practice was not going well, but what did he expect? He should have known they wouldn't hear him, for he could barely hear himself.

The wind tonight was the worst of the season. It was persistent, freezing, and whip-like. The gusts were so strong at points that James would have thought a hurricane was approaching had it not been for the fact that they were in the middle of the North Country.

The day had started out alright. It was the first clear day with no rain, sleet, or snow since the bad weather started back in mid-November. There was still snow packed on the ground, but the sun actually shone for the most of the day, and James had decided this would be the best time for the team to get their first real practice in since their last game. He informed everyone of the impromptu session earlier today at lunch.

But by the time the sun began to set, the winds had kicked in. They had been bearable until about thirty minutes ago, when they turned into gale force status. Everyone had started to complain right away; James' own face was painfully numb and his hands were sore from the hard grip he assumed to keep from falling off his broom.

James knew he should give it up as a bad job. The Quaffle, Bludgers, and Snitch were being tossed about by the wind so forcefully that no one could keep track of them, and the plays he was trying to run were made useless. And besides that, the team was playing with no real effort. They had already been annoyed with James for calling the practice at such last minute, for it was Saturday and only two days before the end of term exams started; everyone was preoccupied with studying and the upcoming holidays.

James continued to watch as the team continued to move in random directions chasing after balls they would never get a hold of. Their next game wasn't until late February. They would have plenty of time to practice in the new year.

"Alright, bring it in!" James yelled. No one heard him. Cursing, he took out his wand and sent red sparks into the air, which immediately gained everyone's attention. James drew a finger across his throat and pointed toward the stands. The team gathered there within seconds.

"I think it's time to call it a night," James said once the team had steadied themselves on the ground.

"You think?" spat Corrine Yates, a fourth year Chaser, as she removed her wrist guards. "That was the most pointless practice ever. I could have been reading up on Charms."

James glared and opened his mouth, but Ted Knowles beat him to it. "Oh, shut it. The only thing you and your silly friends would be reading is the new issue of _Witch Weekly_ for advice on what to get your non-existent boyfriends for Christmas." He ignored her look of outrage and turned to James. "It wasn't so bad. Nice to get on the broom after such a long break."

"Yes, well, that was intention," James said quickly, hoping to forestall Corrine's retort. "Didn't want people to get too sluggish. Just everyone try to get a little flying in over the holidays to keep your form. I'll get in contact with you all on the first day back to setup practice times for January. Thanks for the effort tonight and good luck with exams."

Everyone muttered their good-byes and trotted off to the changing rooms. James sighed and turned back to the field, searching for the rogue balls. After a few minutes and some quick wand work, he finally corralled them into the chest.

As he walked toward the changing rooms, the chest levitated behind him, he felt the first wave of fatigue wash over him, but his night was far from over. Tonight he and the boys would be pulling off their first prank in what felt like ages.

James would have loved to first spend a couple of hours in private with Delilah, but she had more or less cut off their alone time starting last Thursday night. He had been expecting this, for it was exam time, and she had gone into full Ravenclaw mode. The only thing keeping James sane was her promise of her undivided attention as soon her Ancient Runes exam was complete next Thursday afternoon.

Though if he had been allowed to see her, he probably would have declined it. He and the boys had not spent much time together outside of the full moon and homework; his time with Sirius in particular had dropped significantly, and James knew that Sirius was getting irritated. It had started with the last full moon, and in the three weeks since then, Sirius had been quite shirty with him.

James didn't think that Sirius had sufficient reason though. True, James had been spending a lot of time with Delilah, but not much more than what he spent with previous girlfriends. The only difference now was that Sirius didn't have a girlfriend of his own to waste time with, making James' absence more noticeable.

But still, James didn't think he deserved the muttered snide remarks that came from Sirius whenever he left or came back from seeing Delilah. James even went so far to ask Remus if he thought he was spending a lot of time away from them, to which Remus assured him that he personally didn't think James was, and that Sirius' reaction should be expected.

That was certainly true. Sirius was selfish and temperamental to a fault and had always wanted everyone's attention, whether he cared for them or not. James knew this and was shocked with himself for not considering it.

Nevertheless, James knew Sirius' patience was wearing thin, and he didn't want to go into the break with such stupid tension between them, especially since they lived together now. Regardless of how much they were acting like a bunch of sodding girls, James would make it right because Sirius' pride would never let him.

James changed quickly and rushed through the castle to the common room. It was a quarter to 6:00 and dinner would be starting soon. Most of their work would have to be completed while most students were busy eating.

Their victims tonight would be the Slytherins, of course. James and the boys had all felt that they were never properly punished for what they did to Mary MacDonald, and though they knew only a select few were responsible, the curse was so bad that the whole house should have to suffer.

Their punishment would involve the use of a few tricky little charms that Remus had discovered while perusing their Charms textbook. They had not come across it in class yet, as it was not taught until well into Seventh Year, but after a few practice incantations, they all had it down. It would just take a few added tweaks and enhancements to make sure the Slytherins could not simply vanish or end the spells' effects without a little effort so that it could stick around for a while and make its full impact.

"Ready?" James announced as he entered their dormitory. Remus was reading the Charms textbook and taking notes on what James hoped was for their prank, Peter was watching the Marauder's Map, and Sirius was absently guiding a paper airplane around the room with his wand. He looked bored.

"How was practice?" Sirius asked as he let the plane crash into the window. It fell into a crumpled ball on the floor.

"Dreadful," James said he headed toward his bed and stashed his broom underneath. "The winds are as bad as I've ever seen, but it'll be a picnic compared to what the Slytherins will get."

Sirius instantly livened up and grinned mischievously.

James chuckled to himself and rolled his eyes. _He is just too easy sometimes_, James thought.

"Who's taking the cloak?" James asked as he dressed down to a t-shirt and trousers.

"I think Peter should. You're disillusionment charm is still a little unreliable," Remus said, looking apologetically at the former.

Peter only shrugged. "It is," he agreed. "I don't mind."

"Remus, you should use the cloak with him. We'll be better off in pairs," Sirius said.

"Fine with me."

"All set?" James asked once they had appeared ready. The prank involved all wandwork, so there weren't any extra items needing to be stowed and carried.

With assuring nods from everyone, Sirius and James took turns casting disillusionment charms on each other. This had become a necessity since the beginning of Fifth Year, when it became apparent quickly that the bodies of four growing boys could no longer comfortably fit and sufficiently hide under the single invisibility cloak.

Sirius and James led the way out the common room, their outlines only visible to ones who know to look for them. With dinner having started just a few minutes ago, several students were still in the halls on their way to the Great Hall. The boys had no trouble secretly navigating through crowded halls, though; they had done it so many times before that it was second nature to them nowadays.

James caught sight of Delilah as she came from corridor leading to the library. Despite her limp ponytail, dark under-eye circles, and overall slumped posture, she looked as lovely as ever. James smiled her direction but left it at that. He could not get distracted, or Sirius would probably throw a fit. Besides, a few celibate days wouldn't kill him.

But even as he tried to convince himself of this, his mind went back to their last private moment together—she had used her mouth on him for the first time, and it was simply glorious. His whole body tingled at the thought. He couldn't wait to be alone with her again.

Within a few minutes, they boys had made it down the marble staircase, across the Entrance Hall, and through the doorway that led down to the dungeons. They slowed their pace to decrease the sound of their footsteps. The empty corridors and cold, stone walls amplified every sound ten-fold, but the low torchlight worked in their favor, making it more difficult to see the disillusioned boys' outlines.

Peter muttered the password, which he learned after tailing a couple of Slytherin Second Year girls the day before, when they reached the entrance portrait. They were happy to find the common room empty, but knew it didn't mean there couldn't be students in their rooms.

"We'll start here?" James asked in a low voice when he saw Sirius near him and Remus poked a hand out from the cloak to give a thumbs up. "Go on, then."

Remus cleared his throat slightly. "_Tempestas nimbosus_," he said quietly but clearly.

Grey clouds slowly formed above them from thin air. As they grew in volume and swirled around, a light rain began to fall. They all quickly cast impervious charms on each other to shield themselves from the rain. They then separated and repeated the incantation at a few more areas in the room, so that in no time, the entire ceiling was covered with rain clouds.

"Alright, Wormtail, you take care of the girls' dormitories as fast as possible, yeah?" James said, once they had converged at the center of the room again. "Then come help us with the boys'."

Nodding, Peter stepped out from the cloak, transformed into a rat, and scurried through the door leading to the girls' rooms. Theirs would be the easiest since the boys had decided to keep the curses simple. They wanted the majority of their effort spent on the boys' rooms, the Sixth and Seventh Years' in particular.

James, Sirius, and Remus took off for the boys' side. They made quick work of the First, Second, Third, Fourth, and Fifth Years' dorms, creating storms similar to that of the common room, only a bit harsher. Over Regulus' bed, however, Sirius conjured a particularly nasty thunderstorm. A strike of lightning lit one side of his bed curtains on fire that was almost immediately put out by the rain.

"Nice work there, Padfoot," James praised with a clap on Sirius' head that was meant for his shoulder.

"Yeah, thanks," Sirius said a little petulantly as he rubbed the back of his head. "You know I always ensure that little Regulus gets the best."

They were soon in the Seventh Year dorm. Their plan for this room was entirely different.

Sirius extracted a small vial of sand from his pocket and poured it on the floor. Combined engorgement and duplicating charms cast on the small pile had them standing on top of a meter of sand that covered the entire floor within seconds.

James then pulled out a large sack of Ingrid Ingleton's Instant Daylight Powder from Gambol and Japes. However, instead of using the suggested pinch sufficient enough to light a room for hours, he dispersed the entire stock into the air. The resulting light and heat were so intense that the sun itself could have been sitting in the middle of the room.

Remus retrieved his parchment full of notes, read hastily, and pronounced, "_Tempestas flabra_."

Gusts of wind sprang up from nowhere, carrying the sand with it. Although they could not feel the hot, dry air swirling around them, the blinding light caused their eyes to water, and they quickly retreated toward the door. Once opened, a small avalanche of sand spilled through the doorway into the corridor. James had to vanish it away to close the door, leaving the desert of sandstorms behind them.

"Thank Merlin for the impervious charm," Sirius muttered as they made their way to the Sixth Year room. "Good suggestion, Moony."

"I thought it would be useful the minute you mentioned turning the room into the Sahara," Remus said.

"Too bad we couldn't get a couple of camels in there, though," James said sadly.

"As hot as that room must be, they'd probably be dead by the time Dolohov and Goyle got in there," Sirius said.

"Good point," James said laughing.

They were finally at the Sixth Year dorm, the home of their greatest enemies: Snape, Avery, and Mulciber. They had saved the most destructive plan for them.

While Remus began repeating the rain charm, Sirius consulted the list of the other weather spells and conjured hail over the beds. James looked around for the best source of water and grinned when he saw the sinks through the open bathroom door.

"_Reducto_!" he shouted in turn at the 3 sinks. He then did the same to the shower stalls behind him.

Water exploded from the broken pipes and quickly flooded the bathroom and surged into the room. His feet began to feel like ice within seconds as the water rose over his ankles, indicating that his impervious charm was beginning to wear off.

"How high should we let it get?" Sirius yelled over the roar or the gushing water and crashing tiles.

"I think knee deep is good," James suggested as he looked down again. It was rising fast. He sloshed back to the bathroom just as the cold water reached his knees. "_Reparo_!" he said, pointing at each sink and shower, and within a few minutes, they were all repaired and the flooding had stopped.

"Alright, Remus, which spells are which?" Sirius asked as he handed the list back to the former.

Remus grabbed the parchment and glanced over it. "A simple _crystallos_ will freeze the water, and adding _gelum_ to the other weather spells will increase their intensity and chill factor," he explained as he demonstrated the wand movements. "But I think we should get on a bed first."

Sirius and James nodded before recasting impervious charms and hopping on a bed. All three pointed their wands at the water below them and said, "_Crystallos_."

Almost immediately, the entire floor was covered in a span of sleek ice. The wooden posts of the beds and legs of the armoires creaked as the water froze around them.

"Wonderful," Sirius said impishly as he took a tentative step onto the ice. He was able to keep his balance despite the rain falling onto the ice. "But what's that noise?"

James had heard it too. It was a squeaky and scurrying noise. "It's Peter," James said as he rushed toward the door. He opened it quickly and saw Peter in rat form scuttling on the floor. The rat tried to climb the wall of ice but kept slipping. James picked him up, looked down the corridor, and closed the door.

Peter transformed the second James put him down but slipped when his feet made contact with the ice. He had not recast his impervious charm, and his clothes began to soak through from the rain.

"Finished the girls' rooms and tried to get over here as fast as I could, but it's a mess down there," Peter said, panting slightly. "The clouds have sort of created a complete weather system, and the rain is really coming down. Bit windy too." He began to shiver and Remus promptly cast a warming charm.

"Thanks," he muttered. "Also, a couple of younger students were making their way in as I cleared the last steps. They were surprised but also though it was funny. They were laughing, but I'm sure more and more students are making their way back, so we should finish up."

They continued to work, but it was getting more difficult as the room became a disaster. There was now snow falling in the bathroom and gale force winds similar to those outside blowing throughout the rooms. A couple of bedposts snapped, causing the beds to collapse. Rainwater that had collected on top of the ice was now sloshing around in great waves. The wind knocked the water jug and glasses off their table and glass shards flew everywhere. The boys ducked just in time.

"It's in the rooms too!" a voice yelled as someone ran down the corridor just outside the door. It was barely audible over the roar of the storm.

"I think that's our cue to get going," James said. He jumped off the bed and ran to the door. Before opening the door, he looked back and saw Sirius' outline nod. Peter transformed, and Remus was hidden.

James opened the door and water poured into the hall. There were shouts of disbelief as he hopped off the ice. He saw Peter take off down the hall, barely ahead of the charging water.

"What the fuck?"

James looked toward the main corridor and saw Snape and Avery. They were both sopping wet, and James couldn't help but laugh. The current chaos ensured it wasn't heard.

"What's going on here? Who started all of this?" Snaped demanded.

"No one knows," a small boy answered. "It was like this when we returned from dinner."

Girls' screams then erupted from the common room. James followed Snape and Avery as they turned back to investigate.

Peter was right. The common room was a total mess. The fire had died and it was cold and dreary. Loose parchment was torn and smattered all over the room, and everything from the silk hangings on the walls to the paintings to the furniture was completely soaked through.

Numerous girls had jumped onto the chairs and tables and were pointing at the floor.

"What?" Avery yelled.

"It's a rat; we saw a rat!" a couple of them screamed back.

"A rat?" Snape said, and James was sure a blood vessel popped in his eye. "It's those fucking Gryffindors, I know it," he spat.

"Black and them?" Avery asked. "How do you know?"

"I just do!" Snape snapped. "But if he's still here…"

Snape then ran wildly through the common room just as Dolohov came through the entrance. James saw Peter scurry through; Dolohov had not noticed but was staring at Snape in alarm.

"Seal the entrance! They're still here!" Snape growled as he reached the portrait hole.

"What the fuck?" Dolohov said as he looked up at the ceiling in wonder.

"Black and the rest of them," Snape explained as he drew out his wand.

James was suddenly grabbed on his shoulder, and he nearly jumped.

"It's me," Remus whispered. "Sirius is here too. What should we do?"

"I say we just blast them out the way," Sirius snarled quietly. "They can't see us."

"I think that's our only option," James agreed.

"With what then?" Remus asked.

"I think a couple of stunners should do well," Sirius suggested.

"Right," James and Remus said together.

"On three," James said as they walked toward Snape and Dlolohov. "One, two, three!"

"_STUPEFY_!" the three of them shouted. There was a multitude of screams as the bangs rang through the common room and Snape and Dolohov were blasted aside. The force of the three combined spells also blasted the portrait off its hinges.

The three of them raced through, but before James could take off down the corridor, someone grasped his arm and pulled him the opposite direction. He looked around and saw nothing but Sirius' outline do the same.

"Sorry," Remus whispered hastily as he pulled them against the wall, "but they'll think we will have took off toward the main floor and chase us up to the common room. Let's just wait here."

"Good thinking," James said as they retreated a bit further down the hall. They were a good ten meters from the gaping hole leading into the Slytherin common room through which a great deal of sound was coming. A couple of older students did come out and started heading toward the Entrance Hall.

More students coming from dinner saw the destruction and began running toward it, including Lestrange and Mulciber.

"What's going on?" Mulciber demanded of a fourth year boy who had poked his head out the hole.

"Someone started storms in our rooms. Severus and Antonin tried to stop them, but they were stunned."

"What do you mean by storms? And stop whom?"

They boy shrugged. "He never said, and we didn't see who cast the spells."

"I bet it was those fucking Gryffindors," Lestrange muttered as he and Mulciber entered the common room.

"What the fuck?" one of them yelled when they discovered the mess inside.

James and the others laughed silently.

The next twenty minutes they stood there were quite entertaining. More yells and screams came from the common room as each student fresh from dinner entered. There were grunts of frustration when a simple '_finite_' did not stop the freezing rain and howling wind. A number of students quit trying altogether and stood outside the common room. While most older students were able to perform drying spells on themselves, Prefects had to assist the younger students who shivered uncontrollably in huddled groups. As the mass of students in the corridor grew, James, Sirius, and Remus moved further down the opposite direction, making sure to stay in shadow.

The word had finally somehow got to Slughorn, who waddled his way down the hall looking furious. All of the students waiting outside followed him in. Fifteen minutes after he entered the common room, he exited, pursued by a revived Snape who was red with fury.

"But professor," Snape was all but pleading, "I know it was Black and Potter and the rest."

"How many times do I have to tell you: if you do not have proof, there is nothing I can do!" Slughorn said irritably as he began to repair the entrance.

"But—"

"Not another word, Mr. Snape," Slughorn interrupted sternly. "Now, I apologize for not being able to get rid of the storms in your dormitories. Whoever cast them knew what they were doing. You're just going to have to wait them out in the common room. But you're a smart one. Try to figure it out." He gave a final flick of his wand, and the portrait sealed into place. "I'll send word to the houseelves to help with cleaning up. Goodnight."

Snape watched Slughorn leave, looking absolutely murderous. He mumbled the password and went back inside.

"Excellent!" James exclaimed as soon as the corridor was empty. "Did you see Snivellus? Thought he might wet himself when Slughorn brushed him off."

"Yeah, but they know it was us," Remus said as he parted the cloak slightly. "They'll get us back in their own way eventually."

Sirius scoffed. "Small price to pay. It'll make things more interesting at the very least."

"Indeed!" James said, his adrenaline still racing. "Let's get back up to Peter. I'm sure he's worried."

Since they missed dinner and were starving, they made a quick trip to the kitchens, where they were given sandwiches, chips, and custard tarts. Soon after, they reached the packed Gryffindor common room and went straight to their dormitory.

"It's about time!" Peter said, sounding relieved once they were inside and fully visible. "I couldn't get out the map because Andy was in here, and he just left a minute ago. What happened?" he asked, accepting a sandwich from Remus.

They relayed the story of everything that occurred after he had escaped. Peter's face grew worried as they continued.

"You don't think Snape knows about us being Animagi, do you?" he asked.

"As much snooping as Snivellus does, I am sure he suspects something, but not enough to squeal to Dumbledore, or he would have investigated already," Sirius said.

Peter didn't look convinced.

"So Snivellus may suspect something and the Sytherins will be retaliating soon," James began flippantly through a mouth full of chips. "But who gives a hippogriff's arse? The Slytherins are drowning in rain, snow, and sand, and the Marauders are back on top!"

"Here, here!" Sirius said as he extracted a bottle of whiskey out his trunk. He poured a generous measure for them all. They raised their glasses to each other and downed their drinks.

James was in high spirits. He and Sirius were fine, at least temporarily, Peter was reassured, and even Remus appeared genuinely content and relaxed.

It was just like old times, and it felt great.

* * *

Lily was having a very tough time concentrating on her Care of Magical Creatures notes. Not that the material itself was challenging, but pretending that it was and appearing as if she were working turned out to be trickier than she had thought.

It was difficult to pretend when Elias was only centimeters away from her. This was their first time in such close company since deciding to cut down their alone time to study for exams. The urge to kiss him after four days of limited contact was almost too much to overcome. The only thing stopping her at this point was the fact they were in the very full library.

Lily was shocked and relieved when she received Elias' note earlier today about wanting to study together. She only had Care of Magical Creatures left tomorrow, by far her easiest class, while Elias had Ancient Runes. They met after dinner, where Elias gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek, grabbed her hand, and led her to the library. Lily was hoping he would first lead her to their balcony or the Room of Requirement for some quick private time, but had been disappointed.

And this disappointment addled Lily a bit. Since their first night in the Room of Requirement, the physical part of their relationship had progressed very rapidly. The only things left for them to do together were sex and for Elias to use his mouth to…on…

Lily blushed furiously at the mere thought. She was anxious and excited and scared over that more than having sex with Elias, which she wanted very, very deeply. She was keenly aware that she was moving fast and falling hard for him, but it didn't cause her to panic like she thought it would. She felt so comfortable with him, never pressured.

When she admitted this to Keira last night, the latter became concerned.

"Are you sure your feelings are genuine and not just infatuation?" Keira had asked.

"Yes," Lily had answered without hesitation. Their development was fast, yes, but it felt natural to her. And it wasn't just physical, either. She and Elias were very compatible; they could talk about anything.

The physical aspect was progressing _with_ the emotional and intellectual aspects, which was the main difference between her and someone like Jane. Keira had agreed, but still cautioned her to move at a comfortable pace because it was easy to get swept away with something that _seems_ so right, especially after her experience with Severus.

Lily had ignored that muttered last half of Keira's warning, though she knew it was valid.

"So you're still not going to tell me, are you?"

Lily looked over to see Elias doodling absently on his notes. Apparently, he wasn't really studying either.

Although his question seemed vague, Lily knew exactly what he was referring to. Elias had sprung this question in various forms over the past few weeks at random times, hoping to catch Lily off guard.

"I don't understand why it is such a concern to you. Why does it matter?" Lily asked, avoiding a direct answer as usual.

Elias shrugged, still doodling and not looking at her. "It's how guys are. I just want to know who my girl's previous boyfriends were. You don't have to tell me _everything_, but it's something I'll always be curious about and won't stop asking about."

"Wait, wait, wait," Lily said, shaking her head as if she didn't hear him right. "_Your_ _girl_?"

Elias finally looked up at her in confusion. "Yeah, as in you."

"Well, you never formally asked me to be your girlfriend," Lily said wryly, a little fact that nagged her every time his hands began to move under her clothes.

"I just thought it was assumed since our first talk in the Room of Requirement and especially considering all that's happened since then," he said in a low voice.

Lily blushed and looked around them, making sure their conversation remained private. They were sitting at a small table meant for two, but the closest table was still only a couple of meters away.

"Besides," Elias continued, "the book said that it was important, but you told me not to take so much stock in it."

The irony of her advice made Lily laugh before she could stop herself. A few students looked at her, but she ignored them and quieted immediately.

"Of course my own advice would come back to bite me in the arse," she whispered sheepishly. "But I think that knowing to ask would be common sense for any guy."

"Maybe, but, again, you didn't appear to be so concerned with our status whenever I—"

"Shh!" Lily said, putting a finger to his lips and giggling a little.

Elias said nothing but took her finger into his mouth and sucked on it. She immediately extracted it and swatted him on his arm. She then turned away and tried to concentrate on her notes, refusing to look up in case anyone saw them.

"Calm down. No one saw us," Elias said, chuckling a little. "We still haven't resolved our issue."

"What's that?" Lily asked, her eyes still on her work.

Elias grabbed her hand and squeezed it to get her attention. She finally looked up at him and was met with a serious but endearing face. Her whole body relaxed.

"Despite the miscommunication, you _are_ my girlfriend, right?"

Lily smiled. "Of course." She then leaned in and kissed him firmly but pulled away before they got carried away. They were still in the library, after all.

"I think we're done pretending to study, don't you?" he asked in a suggestive voice that sent Lily's heart racing.

"I agree, but I need to ask you something first."

"Go on."

"Petunia is getting married over the hols," Lily said.

"You've mentioned it," Elias said with a smirk.

"Yes, well, I was hoping you could be my date," Lily said. She smiled at him hopefully.

Elias hesitated for a moment. "You want me to visit your home over break to attend your sister's wedding?"

Lily nodded, confused over his reluctance.

"And your parents will be there?"

"I would hope so, considering all things," Lily said, now unsure of whether this was a joke.

Elias chewed his lip a little. "And you don't think it's a little soon for me to meet them?"

"Ah," Lily said, understanding finally. "I won't introduce you to my parents as my boyfriend, just a date."

"I'm sure they'll be able to catch on."

"True, but it'll be Petunia's day, and trust me, she will make sure our parents' attention will be completely on her," Lily explained. "Though my dad might interrogate you for maybe five minutes instead of thirty."

"Great," he muttered.

"Don't worry," Lily said smiling. "I'll make him promise to go easy on you."

"Alright," he said after a moment, and Lily was happy to see him loosening a bit. "Weddings usually equal good food and good wine. Should be fun, especially with such good company." He leaned in and gave her a lingering kiss that Lily broke only when she heard a giggle to her left. She turned sharply and saw Loretta Bloom, the school's premier gossip, whispering with her friends.

"Time to go," Lily said, turning back to Elias, who was already packing his bag.

"Couldn't agree more," Elias muttered. A few minutes later, they were heading out the library.

"So I'm just taking you back to Gryffindor Tower, right?" Elias said as they reached the main staircase.

"That's fine," Lily said, unaffected. "I have to get this Care of Magical Creatures stuff down. I'm still not getting it."

"Ah, well maybe you just need to relax a bit," Elias suggested. "Your brain won't grasp anything if you're rankled."

"Have any ideas on how to accomplish that?"

"A few," Elias said slyly, "but they require a far quieter and more private place than a common room."

"Then lead the way," Lily said eagerly, and Elias whisked her in the opposite direction to the empty classroom on the fourth floor.

* * *

**A/N: A very big thank you to those who have taken the time to review my story thus far. I am very flattered.**

**I apologize for such a seemingly rushed chapter with short sections for the characters, but there were a few things I wanted to wrap up with the fall term before I get to the chapters concerning their Christmas and New Years holiday break.**

**I am hoping to post a new chapter every few (3-4) weeks, but I can't promise much since my school and work schedule have really kicked into gear. I really appreciate those who continue to follow the story and will do my best to update regularly without compromising the quality I am happy with.**


	11. Out with the Old Part I

No words could express how happy and relieved Isabella was to be currently sitting on the Hogwarts Express as she left said school and her first term behind.

It was the many odd and upsetting events that occurred during her first term that made Hogwarts a point of contention within her. While she was grateful to have met a number of polite and fun people and experience new challenges, there had been too many reminders of the real world outside and the initial reason for her now living in England and attending Hogwarts.

Her mother's death—which now weighed heavier and heavier on her heart as the holiday season trudged on. Isabella knew she had a lot to be thankful for—her father's health, a place to call home, caring new friends—but it was difficult to keep her guard up all the time. It was hard to let go of the memories of their home in Bellport Bay during Christmas, a house full of family, love, and laughter, and how that simply would not be the case this year. It was a bitter pill to swallow.

But Isabella smiled anyways as she watched the snowy countryside rush by. Because forgetting everything else, she had a couple of weeks to spend with her father, relax, and collect herself, and she _would_ enjoy them.

The train ride so far had been mostly uneventful. The girls had been able to procure an empty compartment, and since then had passed the time with listless chit-chat, as they were all still pretty worn out from the week of exams. The only episode of interest occurred when Lily returned from an hour's absence spent with Elias, looking content, at ease, and pleasantly tousled.

How Isabella envied her—in a good-natured way, of course. She didn't consider herself a nosey person, but Isabella would love to know just what Lily and Elias were up to, if only to live vicariously through Lily. Although she assumed they were doing more than kissing, a nice, long make-out session would suffice for Isabella at this point. And considering her long drought, anyone would do—even Adam.

_Because I wouldn't actually have to look at him, right?_ she thought with a frown._ I could just close my eyes and fantasize about_—

"Did Garret ever respond to your letter?"

"Hmm?" Isabella said absently as she looked over at Keira.

"Garret?" Lily asked, her expression curious.

"Yes, he did," Isabella replied when she realized what Keira had asked. "I got his letter a few days ago."

"And?" Keira asked with an anxious grin.

"He and his family are visiting us the day before New Year's Eve," Isabella said. "Nothing much besides that."

Which was true for the most part. Garret's letter had been short and succinct, but he had said that he was happy to hear from her and looked forward to seeing her and Derrick.

"Tell us about him," Lily said. "About your relationship and everything. You've never said much about him."

"It isn't the most exciting story," Isabella said.

"But we still want to know," Keira said. "Especially all the juicy stuff."

Isabella frowned. "I don't know about all of _your_ juicy stuff."

"Then we'll all share!" Jane said, and Lily's look of horror mirrored Isabella's thoughts.

"Yeah," Keira added. "We have another long four hours, and we haven't had a _proper_ gossip session for a while, and not at all with Isabella. I personally want to know all the dirt on Lily and Elias."

Lily blushed but grinned.

"But Isabella first," Jane said, a challenging smirk at her lips.

Isabella's insides squirmed. She didn't mind talking about her relationship with Garret, but she had never talked about sex or anything of that nature with these girls before, and broaching this subject with new people made her slightly uneasy. Although, she did have to admit that she was just as interested in whatever stories they had to tell.

"So about Garret…" Keira prodded with an expectant look at Isabella after the latter had been silent for a moment.

"Yeah, well his father, Allen, and mine have been friends since they started Auror training together years ago," Isabella began. "As they both progressed, my dad excelled in mentoring and training new recruits while Allen performed extremely well with planning missions and other tactical aspects, so they worked closely together.

"And they remained friends outside of work, got married around the same, had kids around the same time, so I've literally known Garret since the day I was born," Isabella continued, "but I don't actually remember anything about him before we were both seven years old. That's when his mother started tutoring neighborhood children a couple of times a week before starting magical school.

"And you know it was the usual—stupid little crushes with the chasing, and the hair pulling, and the name-calling," Isabella said with a wistful smile. "I think I realized I liked him when we were eleven and had started school."

"So when did you guys start dating?" Lily asked.

"Not until we were fourteen, but we had our first kiss during a joint dance when we were thirteen," Isabella said.

It was the Valentine's Day ball. They had been dancing after being pushed together by their respective friends. After some nervous chatting, Garret leaned in and kissed her quickly on the lips before rushing off to the bathroom. Isabella had been disappointed, fearing she had scared him off in some way. But later on that night right before the boys left for their school, he found her and led her out onto an empty veranda where he kissed her properly. Isabella knew then and there, in true thirteen-year-old fashion, that she wanted to marry Garret as soon as they were of age and have a hundred of his babies.

"And I guess our relationship was pretty normal from there, save for the fact we went to separate schools," Isabella continued. "Sex never came up during the first year. He was probably thinking about it, but I wasn't—well, in a sense. Of course I had thought about it in the abstract but not about _us_; it was still an intangible concept to me at fourteen."

She looked up hoping to find reassurance in her friends' faces. Keira and Lily were nodding, but Jane looked at her with a skeptical smirk.

"But we did…things…" Isabella's mind went back to the first time she had let him feel up under her shirt and how long it had taken him to unhook her bra…to the first time she had seen _all_ of him…to the first time she had ever climaxed with the help of his wonderful hands.

"So you're a virgin?" Jane asked bluntly.

"Yes," Isabella answered tentatively. "Are you three?"

Keira, Lily, and Jane shook their heads in unison.

"Oh," Isabella said flatly. She knew there was nothing to be ashamed about for being a virgin, but she instantly felt a little less mature than her roommates nonetheless.

Lily must have sensed this. "But it's not that big of a deal. It's really overrated."

Jane gaped at her. "You just haven't had it with the right person."

"I'll say," Keira muttered. Lily glared at her before turning back to Isabella.

"At least for me it was," Lily went on. "I've only done it twice, and both times were for the wrong reasons."

"With Severus?" Isabella asked, not caring if she was prying. They were the ones who started it.

Lily nodded. "But those are boring stories. You want real tips? Ask these two."

"You make us sound like scarlet-lettered harlots," Keira said indignantly.

"What do I need tips for?" Isabella asked with some bitterness. "I have no prospects."

"Adam!" shouted Lily and Keira before looking at each other and bursting into laughter.

"Or Garret," Jane added suggestively.

Isabella looked at her questioningly.

"Take advantage of his visit," Jane explained. "He's not some random guy; he's someone you know and trust. And even if you two don't feel the same anymore, you'll still be attracted to each other at the very least, and sometimes that's all it takes."

"Spoken like a guy," Keira said disapprovingly.

Jane shrugged. "I'm not ashamed to admit I enjoy sex. I don't need all the sappy, emotional crap attached to it."

Keira and Jane continued to bicker as Isabella thought about Jane's suggestion.

What _would_ be so terrible about having sex with Garret when she saw him, just to get it over with? After all, he was the one who she had always thought she would lose her virginity to, the only one she had _wanted_ to lose it to. Did it matter that he wasn't her boyfriend anymore?

_Yes_, Isabella thought.

Casual sex was fine for Jane and whoever else, but not for her, at this point in her life at least. Isabella didn't expect the night she lost her virginity to be some grand, sweepingly romantic, and perfect event that most girls were taught to anticipate, but she at least wanted to share the experience with someone she deeply cared about and who felt the same about her. And though this could still be the case between her and Garret, she preferred for that someone to be a current boyfriend—not an _ex_-boyfriend.

"I don't know if I would be comfortable trying to seduce my ex-boyfriend into having sex with me, especially with my father and his family under the same roof," Isabella finally said before Keira could snap back at Jane. "Who's to say he doesn't already have another girlfriend? Or simply isn't interested anymore?"

Jane rolled her eyes and huffed dramatically. "He's a _guy_; of course he will be interested."

Isabella wasn't sure if she should be flattered or offended. "It still won't feel right."

"Well if not sex, than get a little _something_ out of him," Jane said with a grudging look at Isabella.

"Now that I can do," Isabella said, grinning. "I have no qualms with dragging him into a dark corner and snogging—that's the word, right?—his brains out. Along with some other stuff."

"Sounds like you've already thought about it," Lily said wryly.

"Maybe," Isabella said elusively, but could not help smirking

Jane nodded with an approving smile.

Hours later, the train finally pulled into Kings Cross. Isabella was surprised at how quickly the time had passed when gossiping. She had learned that Keira lost her virginity in the middle of Fifth Year to her then boyfriend, a Ravenclaw named Finlay Garrow, a Sixth Year at the time, who she was still on friendly terms with. There had been only one other boy since then, a Muggle neighbor she had a fling with this past summer.

Jane, on the other hand, had had five partners since her first time during Fourth Year when she lost it to a then Seventh Year Gryffindor. Isabella knew she shouldn't have been surprised, but at hearing that Jane's list included Sirius, she became jealous. However, she tried to hide it because she knew Jane had gone into particular detail about him just to annoy her.

Isabella stepped off the train and spotted her father right away, not surprised to see him chatting with Edward Potter. After hugs, 'Good-byes,' and 'Merry Christmases' with her roommates, she rushed over to him and gave him a big hug.

"Isabella," he greeted heartily, returning her hug. "So happy to see you." He then gestured to Edward. "I am sure you remember Edward Potter?"

"Of course," Isabella said with a smile. "Good afternoon, Mr. Potter."

"Edward, dear, please called me Edward," he said genially. "How was your first term at Hogwarts?"

"Interesting," was all Isabella could think to say.

Edward chuckled and nodded. "Yes, considering all I've heard, I think that is the best way to describe it." He then looked over her head. "Ah yes, and here come two who I am sure had an interesting term as well, though for all the wrong reasons."

Isabella turned to see James and Sirius walking their way. She hadn't seen them the entire ride, disappointed that they had failed to visit the girls' compartment as her roommates had complained so often happened. She wondered what they had been up to.

"Boys," Edward greeted with a nod when they finally reached them.

"Hi, Dad," James and Sirius said together as James gave him a quick hug.

"I didn't know you had another son," Derrick said with some confusion.

"Not in the usual sense," Edward explained. "Sirius is James' best friend who we have sort of taken in. He has always been like a second son to us."

Isabella glanced at Sirius at these words. Sirius blushed a little but tried to remain cool. It was endearing.

"Sirius, this is Mr. Derrick Williams, Isabella's father and Head of the new Auror Training Program," Edward said. Sirius and her father shook hands and exchanged pleasantries; Isabella's insides writhed a little.

"It's nice to see you again, Mr. Williams," James then said as he shook Derrick's hand. Isabella had to turn to hide her grin. It was too much seeing these otherwise boisterous and boorish boys act so appropriate and reserved.

"Please call me Derrick," her father insisted. James and Sirius nodded.

"Well, we must get going or Clarice will worry herself into a frenzy," Edward said. "At least by the end of next term, you'll be able to Apparate and get home on your own."

Isabella's eyes grew in surprise, which earned her puzzled looks from the four men. She had completely forgotten about Apparation lessons and was not sure how they were conducted here. The past few months had gone by so quickly with so much incidence, that she hadn't realized she would be eligible to earn her license in just under two months' time, though she knew she would most likely not be ready.

"How are lessons done here?" Isabella inquired.

"You can choose to take them at school for a few Galleons," Edward explained. "It's a twelve week course. They have a couple of testing dates during school for those who are eligible. If you aren't eligible for any of those dates, you can take it on your own over summer."

"Oh," Isabella said. It seemed straightforward enough. But she had always hated Side-Along Apparation, and if individual Apparation was anything like it, training was going to be hell.

"Nervous?" Sirius asked, and Isabella was unsettled to hear the same bit of challenge his voice from when they had sneaked off to Hogsmeade.

"Ah, slightly," Isabella admitted sheepishly.

"I'm sure you'll be a right dab at Apparation," Edward said amiably. "Everyone's nervous at the beginning," he said with a sharp look at Sirius.

"Well, like I said, we should be going." Edward looked back at Derrick. "So you've given my invitation thought, I hope? We will be seeing you?"

"Oh, yes, of course," Derrick said politely. "Looking forward to it."

"Great, great," Edward said, clapping his hands together. "Ready boys?" They nodded. "Alright, then. Derrick, Isabella, have a Happy Christmas and we will see you in a few days."

"Same to you," Derrick answered.

"Goodbye, Isabella," James said as he turned and followed his father. "Happy Christmas!"

"Yeah, see you soon," Sirius said with a grin. "Nice meeting you, Mr. Williams." Derrick nodded his head and raised a hand.

Isabella watched them disappear through the barrier, still somewhat addled by Sirius' lingering grin. She turned to her father, who had grabbed her trunk and owl cage.

"Dad, why will be seeing them in a few days?"

"Ah, yes, I've been meaning to write you. I thought you might need time to buy some new dress robes," Derrick said as they began walking toward the barrier.

"Dress robes?" Isabella repeated.

"Yes," Derrick said. "The Potters host a small New Year's Eve gathering every year for their close friends and colleagues. They invited us, and I thought we'd enjoy meeting more people. Though now I admit I didn't think you might have plans of your own, possibly with your new friends."

"Oh," Isabella said faintly. She honestly hadn't given New Years any thought, and oddly enough, her roommates had not mentioned anything either. "That sounds fine, and I do need new dress robes."

"Great," Derrick said. "We will find some time after Christmas to head to Diagon Alley."

"Sounds good," Isabella said absently as they stepped into a side alley next to Kings Cross. She grabbed her father's hand, and they stepped into suffocating darkness, Sirius' grin at the forefront of Isabella's mind.

* * *

Lily sat drumming her fingers on the kitchen table as everyone else in the house moved at a frenetic pace around her.

It was December 26, Boxing Day, and the day of Petunia's wedding.

Her holiday break so far had been absolute hell. Although the wedding had been planned and set for months, Petunia had still found something to complain about, question, or change regarding her flowers, linens, vows, and everything else.

With Lily gone most of the year, her mother, Sophia, always set aside time to spend with only her whenever she came home. During the Christmas holidays, it was usually spent doing last minute gift shopping, but it was encroached upon this year. Petunia had come along with them, claiming to need their help with picking out small gifts for her bridal party and future in-laws. Lily had not been able to get in two words about her fall term without Petunia interrupting her. After just one hour, Lily had become so frustrated that she feigned a headache and left for home without them.

And it had happened again just as Lily and Sophia set out for their favorite neighborhood café for tea one afternoon. Petunia had joined them but asked if they could first stop by the caterer so that she could finalize a couple of things. Two hours and about 100 revisions later, Petunia was satisfied, but still needed to stop by the bakery. Again, Lily bade them a disgruntled good-bye and headed home.

The last straw had been three days ago, as Lily and Sophia prepared to head to the theater to see the _Nutcracker_, an annual family tradition that, until a couple of years ago, had included Petunia.

Her darling sister had burst through the door, bawling her eyes out over some silly row she and Vernon had had and screaming that the wedding was off. Sophia and Leonard, their father, had tried to convince her it was nothing but pre-wedding jitters, but she insisted otherwise and demanded that Lily call everyone to tell them the horrible news and for Leonard to go see Vernon and set him straight.

After a couple of mugs of strong tea and hours of motherly comforting, Petunia had calmed down, but by then it was 11:00 at night, the ballet was long over, and Lily's plans had been ruined once again.

However, as annoyed as Lily was about everything, she wasn't particularly surprised by Petunia's behavior. This was Petunia's moment, and she didn't want Lily around. But since their parents insisted on them getting along, or at least _pretending_ to, Lily had to be there, and Petunia had to deal with it. But Petunia in turn was going to make it as miserable as possible for Lily, which included making her look a mess.

Despite the fact that Lily was not part of the wedding party, Petunia had somehow convinced their mother that she should be able to choose Lily's dress for the day. When Lily opened the box from the dress boutique, she nearly screamed in horror at the mass of pink fabric inside. She tried it on at the insistence of her mother and tried to keep a straight face as she descended the stairs in the long-sleeved, low-cut, ill-fitting dress that ended oddly at mid-calf and awkwardly cut her off.

It would not have been so bad had it not been covered in loose layers of tulle that gave her a bulky shape or if the satin sheath underneath wasn't too tight. It was the type of dress that a desperate, recently divorced mid-forties mother would inappropriately wear to a church service in hopes of catching a bloke's eye.

_And for goodness sakes, it's baby pink_! Lily thought angrily, glaring down at the sleeves as she continued to drum her fingers. _I look like a walking mass of cotton candy_.

The thought of Elias seeing her in such an outfit nauseated her slightly, but the knowledge of soon seeing Elias after a long week apart was enough to make her forget about the dress, if only for a minute. She had been thinking of ways to thank him for his Christmas present: a beautiful moleskin journal that was charmed to open only at her touch and an accompanying gorgeous gold hippogriff quill.

"Lily, dear?"

Lily looked up to see her father walking into the kitchen holding two large floral arrangements that she knew were centerpieces.

"Need help with that, dad?" Lily asked as she stood up.

"No, I'm alright," he sighed as he sat one on the table. "But would you mind putting on a couple of kettles for the florists and them?"

"Sure," Lily said, grabbing the teapots off the stove and walking toward the sink.

As she filled the kettles, she watched through the window as florists, caterers, and other decorators scrambled around to transform their backyard into a dining area under a large, white tent. Petunia was lucky that it hadn't snowed for the past week, but the portable heaters being charged for later tonight were still numerous.

They had arrived early, around 6:00, just as Lily was waking up to get ready for the day. She had known that Petunia and her bridesmaids would be kicking her down to the ground floor as soon as they arrived to get ready and had wanted to avoid them at all costs.

Setting the kettles back on the stove, Lily thought, as she had this morning when the setup started, about how much easier this would all be with magic. There would have been no need to start so early when the reception was not until 4:00 in the afternoon. But even if Lily had been able to use magic, she knew Petunia would not have enlisted her help, and Lily was sure she would not have offered in the first place.

In her earlier years as a witch, Lily would have felt some guilt at her harsh opinions of Petunia and the distance that had grown between them, but now such remorse was futile. No matter how much Lily wanted to repair their once close relationship, she would only be met with resistance. Petunia had adapted to life without her around and seemed to now prefer it.

Back in fourth year, as Lily cried on Severus' shoulder after Petunia returned a charm bracelet sent as a birthday gift, he had asked her if it would make her and Petunia close again, would she give up her magic? Lily didn't hesitate answering 'Yes' because she had still missed her companionship with her sister and thought it was worth salvaging. But if Lily were given the choice now, she would choose her life as it is after witnessing how cold a so-called sister could be.

Lily realized that she also had been no saint over the past couple years where Petunia was concerned, but Lily believed that Petunia had initiated their fallout due her jealousy, though Lily wholeheartedly felt that she had never once bragged about being accepted into Hogwarts. But who to blame no longer mattered; Lily and Petunia were sisters in name only, and even that would soon change.

Although Lily had come to terms with their distance over summer, today it hit her more than she would like. After all, it was Petunia's wedding day, a day where they should be closer than ever, a day where Lily should be happiest and most supportive for her sister, but she wasn't wanted or needed, and that hurt a bit.

Lily wasted the rest of the morning working on her Charms and Potions homework in her father's study, while Petunia and her three bridesmaids noisily prepared for the day upstairs. On more than one occasion, Lily was made to fetch them tea and snacks because they couldn't be bothered between painting their nails and doing their hair. Her annoyance mounted slowly but steadily, and she couldn't wait to have a drink or a good snog with Elias to relax her nerves.

They weren't due at the church for the ceremony until 2:00, and she told Elias to be over around 1:30, but she hoped he would surprise her and show up a little early. Although, she could understand if he didn't in wanting to keep the time in the presence of her parents before the wedding as short as possible.

However, Lily got her wish.

When the doorbell rang at a quarter to 1:00, Lily assumed it was more hired help. She settled further into her seat in hopes of forgetting the time, but a knock at the study door and her mother's voice caught her by surprise.

"Lily, your guest is here."

She looked up as Sophia came through the door, closely followed by Elias. A mixture of relief, anticipation, and desire surged through her as their eyes met.

"Elias," Lily said as she stood, unable to suppress her grin. She knew it would give her true feelings away to her mother, but she couldn't help it. Really, it was taking all of her effort now to restrain herself from jumping into his arms.

"Mum, this is Elias, a friend from school," Lily said in a small voice. She all of a sudden felt so guilty that she could hardly meet her mother's eyes.

"Yes, he introduced himself at the door, but it is nice to formally meet you, Elias," Sophia said.

"You, as well, Mrs. Evans," Elias said. "Thank you for having me."

"Our pleasure. Lily speaks very highly of you," Sophia said in a tone that let Lily know she was not fooled by Lily's insistence that they were only friends.

Lily blushed and diverted her eyes.

"MUM!"

Their heads snapped up toward the ceiling at the sound of Petunia's piercing shout. Lily could have screamed herself in her annoyance but was happy that it broke the tension.

"I should probably see about that," Sophia said as she headed toward the door. Lily noticed both exasperation and resignation in her voice. "Your father left to see Vernon and give him the family cufflinks. He should be back in a bit," she added with a significant look at Lily.

"Thanks, mum," Lily said, smiling knowingly. Sophia nodded and closed the door behind her.

Lily then turned to Elias who was staring at her with an expression she couldn't place. She squirmed under his scrutiny.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" Lily said.

Elias half shrugged. "It's not usually the mother guys have to worry about," he said. "Besides, I can be a damn right gentleman when I need to be."

"And you certainly look the part," Lily said with a prolonged gaze that started at his feet and made its way up. He was wearing a very elegant dark grey suit with a navy shirt and patterned tie. When she finally reached his eyes, she added, "You look very handsome." She was sad to see he was clean-shaven but admired how well he cleaned up.

"And you look gorgeous, as always," he said as he pulled her into his arms.

But Lily gently pushed away. "You're lying."

Elias looked confused. "Why would you say that?" he chuckled.

"Because you've been staring at me as if I were covered in stinksap since the moment you walked in," Lily pouted.

"I'm sorry, but it's the pink," he admitted, gesturing helplessly at her dress. "I've just never seen you in that color before."

"Of course you haven't," Lily bristled. "No redhead in her right mind would wear this color. It clashes horribly with our hair."

"Then why…"

"Petunia," Lily said dully.

"Ah," Elias said with an apologetic smile. "Well regardless of the color, you still look amazing," he said as he let his eyes linger on her chest which was exposed by the low neckline. "And," he said as he pulled her into his arms again and buried his face in her neck, "your scent is as delicious as ever." He then kissed a trail to her collarbone that left goosebumps in its wake.

Lily felt emboldened at his obvious pleasure. Knowing she would look horrid in this dress, Lily had taken more time than usual this morning to ensure everything else looked perfect. She had meticulously plucked her eyebrows, blended her makeup, and curled her hair into soft, flowing waves that cascaded down her back. The last would infuriate Petunia the most, as her hair always garnered compliments and attention wherever she went.

Lily sighed in content as he continued to place kisses across her shoulder, back up her neck, and along her jaw.

"I've missed you," he whispered against her lips before taking them with his own.

As they continued to kiss, Lily gently pushed him backwards until he was firm against the wall. She then pressed her tongue against his lips, and he eagerly accepted it. Lily moaned as the kiss deepened, and Elias' hands roamed all over her body, paying special attention to her bum.

Without any pretense, Lily's hands reached for his perfectly pressed shirt and tugged it up and out his trousers. She quickly unbuckled his belt, and before he could as much as break the kiss and speak her name, she had unbuttoned and unzipped his slacks, shoved her hands down his pants, and grabbed his manhood.

"Sweet Jesus," Elias groaned as Lily stroked him firmly. He mumbled a bit incoherently before roughly grabbing the back of her head and crushing his mouth to hers.

Lily's own desire escalated as Elias' arousal continued to grow hard and hot in her hands. The thought of it inside her made her shudder, and she was unsure if she would be able to wait until tonight, when she had every intention of dragging him to her bedroom, seducing him, and shagging him stupid.

One or two hours into the reception, it would be too easy with everyone uncomfortably stuffed and sufficiently drunk. No one would miss them, as Lily was nearly unrecognizable to a lot of her extended family since she was at Hogwarts nearly ten months out of the year and rarely saw them, she had never once met anyone from Vernon's family except his parents who she knew did not care for her, and Elias was a stranger to them all.

Her decision had been set the minute he consented to coming to the wedding, and she couldn't see any reason why he would object. It had been obvious over the past couple of weeks that he was more than ready and willing; it was just up to Lily to decide where and when.

Elias suddenly broke the kiss. "Lily…you have to stop."

"I know," she mumbled against his lips, but she didn't and he made no move to stop her.

"You're father will be home soon."

"I know."

"And your mother can come looking for us any minute now."

"I know."

"And the, uh, mess will be more difficult to get rid of without magic."

"I know."

"Then why aren't you stopping?"

Lily smiled. "Because you don't want me to."

"God, no," Elias whispered so quietly that Lily was unsure if he had spoken at all.

But Lily stroked him only once more before he let out a heavy sigh and grabbed her wrists. Lily looked up at him through her lashes. His eyes were darkened with lust but his jaw was set. As he loosened his grip, she realized that her teasing was done, but as she extracted her hands, she made sure to drag her nails slowly up his length.

Elias bit his bottom lip in response. "You're a right little tart, you know that?"

"I was just thanking you for the wonderful gift," Lily said innocently as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. "And you bring it out of me."

"I'm going to take that as a compliment."

"You should."

"And on top of that, you mussed my suit," Elias chided as he released her and smoothed his shirt. "You have any idea how long it took me to iron this without magic?"

Lily giggled. "I can only imagine," she said as she pressed into him again.

Elias sucked in a breath and lightly pushed her away. "I can't have you this close."

"I'm sorry," she said, truly feeling guilty about his current discomfort. She should have known better than to try to get him off in her father's study.

"No matter."

"You should try to do something about that before my father returns home," Lily said.

"Nothing a couple of splashes of cold water to the face and imagining Madam Grimes in a bikini won't fix," Elias said. His eyes were closed and he was banging his head against the wall in what Lily knew was frustration. "Nearest loo?"

"You're lucky there's one in here," she said as she pointed to a door on the opposite wall.

Elias opened his eyes and nodded. "I'll be just a second," he said, walking toward her and placing a kiss on her forehead. "Mind making me a cup of tea with a shot of whatever you got?"

"Sure, I'll be in the kitchen," Lily said with a sympathetic smile.

Elias rushed into the bathroom and firmly closed the door behind him. Lily looked at her reflection in a window and was happy to see she didn't look too rumpled, though she knew her face and chest were flushed. One look at her, and her mother would suspect they were up to something.

Lily shrugged it off and headed out the study, down the hall, and into the kitchen. She was shocked to see Petunia standing at the sink, sipping on a glass of water, watching the commotion in the backyard, and above all, looking relaxed for the first time since Lily had been home.

"Hey, Tuney," Lily said amiably. She had promised herself this morning that she would make every effort to be nice to her sister today. That is, until Petunia provoked her, which was bound to happen.

Petunia started at Lily's voice and looked around. She herself looked startled to see Lily; it was either that or not hearing the usual contempt.

"Hello," Petunia said in the same tone. She then turned back to the window.

Save for the fact that she was wearing an old pair of sweats, Petunia was all ready to go. All she needed to do was put on her dress. Though Lily knew she herself was no beauty queen, she had never found Petunia to be very attractive. If Lily were completely honest, Petunia was a bit horse-faced.

But today was different. Her light but scrupulously applied makeup and elegant updo softened her features. On top of that, Lily noticed a glow emanate from Petunia that she attributed to the fact it was her wedding day. Whatever Lily thought of Vernon—and it was all horrible—Petunia was genuinely happy with him, and today was their day.

"You look very pretty," Lily said after a moment with as much sincerity she could muster.

Petunia turned again, her eyes suspicious, but they softened once she realized there was no acrimony in Lily's tone. She looked as if she were about to thank Lily for the compliment, but her eyes shifted and narrowed at something behind Lily.

Lily turned to see Elias joining them. She glanced down quickly and let out a sigh of relief—the pitched tent was gone. She looked back up, and he winked at her.

"Who are you?"

Lily's jaw clenched at Petunia's unfriendly tone, but she tried to brush off the irritation. She grabbed Elias' arm and brought him further into the kitchen.

"Petunia, this is Elias, a friend from school," she introduced. "Elias, this is my sister, Petunia."

Elias advanced forward to shake Petunia's hand, but she remained motionless as she stared up at him in what could be described as only thing—pure envy. Lily found it difficult to suppress her smirk.

"Nice to finally meet the blushing bride," Elias said smoothly as he grasped her limp hand. She gaped at his overt flirtation and snatched her hand away.

"You and Lily are just friends?" she asked in a skeptical tone.

Elias chuckled a bit. "No, we are very much together, but she wanted to keep it a secret for now to avoid unease with your parents today."

Lily could've kicked him, but she honestly loved watching Petunia continue to stare at her very tall, very attractive, and very charming boyfriend. He was everything Vernon was not.

"Well," Petunia said as she composed herself, and Lily instantly worried at her falsely cheerful tone, "you're definitely more appealing than her last boyfriend." She then laughed mirthlessly. "But of course, _anyone_ is more appealing than Severus."

The look Petunia gave Lily as she spoke those last words had Lily seeing red. She should have known that Petunia would try to regain the upper hand. It was a reminder that this was Petunia's day, and she was making sure it remained that way.

"Snape?" Elias said in confusion. Lily couldn't look at him; she was afraid to see his expression.

"You know him?" Petunia asked. "Oh, but of course you would. You all attend that _school_ together."

Elias then turned to Lily, and she finally glanced up at him, trying to keep her face passive despite the combination of anger and humiliation surging through her.

"The ex-boyfriend you told me about was Severus Snape?" he asked, his tone disbelieving.

Lily made to answer but Petunia spoke over her.

"You mean Lily never told you about him?" Petunia asked in mock incredulity.

"No," Elias answered. Lily was somewhat relieved to not hear any doubt in his tone.

Petunia frowned. "Oh, I wonder why. They dated for years, on and off." She then smiled. "Well, I better head up to finish getting ready." She passed Elias with the same sweet smile, but as she passed Lily, it turned into a malicious smirk. She said nothing more as she disappeared upstairs.

A long moment passed, and neither she nor Elias said anything. Lily tried to remain calm, but her breathing came in short, slightly spastic gasps and an uncomfortable heat spread up her chest and face.

"So, Severus Snape?" Elias finally said in the same tone from before. "He doesn't seem like your type."

"He's not," Lily said in a small voice. She wasn't sure if the latter comment was an attempt at quelling some of the tension. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Elias asked. "You didn't do anything wrong, didn't lie to me or anything."

"Yeah, but you told me about Camille, and I purposely kept this from you," Lily said.

He shrugged. "You must have had your reasons."

"It wasn't how Petunia described it; it wasn't some passionate love affair," Lily said quickly, feeling a suffocating need to explain herself.

"But the 'for years' comment?"

"It's true for the most part," Lily admitted. "But it was more off than on. We knew each other before starting at Hogwarts. We were friends."

Elias nodded absently. After a pause he said, "Why did you keep it from me?"

Why _had_ she been afraid to tell him? Her relationship with Severus had always caused a variety of emotions and reactions within her. The most prominent among them being shame for letting him repeatedly treat her so horribly, hurt and anger for his betrayals, and, knowing it made her incredibly vain, embarrassment for ever dating him, with his lanky frame, pallid, greasy skin, hooked nose, and oily curtain of hair. The thought of him touching her now absolutely repulsed her.

"I don't know," she answered uneasily. "I—it's just that those aren't my proudest moments."

"Understandable," he said.

Lily swallowed hard at his new tone. It was perfunctory and detached. She could only imagine the disgust he felt toward her.

"What are you thinking?" she blurt out before she could stop herself. She was alarmed at how broken her voice sounded.

"Nothing in particular."

"Elias—"

"If you're worried that I'm not interested anymore, don't," he interrupted. "I'll admit that it is weird, very weird, to learn that you were involved with him, especially considering his actions toward Muggle-borns, the company he keeps, and his suspected allegiances."

Lily nodded, feeling the shame consume her over everything else. She had heard the same lecture from Keira, Jane, and Mary in various forms numerous times before.

"But it's in the past," he continued as he looked straight into her eyes, as if searching beyond them for something that would confirm that she was indeed done with everything having to do with Severus.

"It is," Lily said fervently.

"And that's all that matters," he said in a tone of finality. He smiled at her, but it wasn't as warm as the one from just minutes before, before Petunia ruined her day.

Elias stepped toward her and brought her into his arms once again. She buried her face in his chest, trying her best not to cry as overwhelming anxiety swelled suddenly within her. She would give anything to know exactly what he was thinking now.

Was he really more disgusted than he led on? Had he realized that her initial feelings for him, however genuine now, were partly spurred on by her need to forget Severus? Did he not trust her anymore? What did he now think of their extra Potions lessons together? Would he ask her to discontinue them?

Question after question raced through her mind as they continued to awkwardly embrace in the kitchen. As she wondered when, or even if, they would fully talk about it, the front door slammed, making them both jump.

"Sophia, Lily, Petunia?" Leonard's voice called from the hall. Elias immediately let go of Lily and stepped about a meter away from her.

Lily plastered on a smile as she heard her father approach the kitchen. She hoped he wouldn't notice her flushed appearance or hear her heart beating wildly against her chest.

"Lily, there you are," Leonard said as he reached the doorway with two large grocery bags. He walked in, placed the bags on the counter, and placed a kiss on Lily's forehead. He then turned to Elias and extended his hand. Elias took it and shook it heartily. "And you must be Elias."

"Yes, hello, Mr. Evans," Elias said, and Lily was impressed at how calm he sounded. "It's good to meet you, sir."

"Yes, yes, you as well," Leonard said as he nodded and went back to the bags. "You attend Hogwarts then?"

"Correct, sir. I am in sixth year like Lily, but in Hufflepuff house."

"Ah, the house of ponces who stick together because they're too scared to venture out on their own, as how Lily, I believe, described it at one time," Leonard said.

"Dad!"

Elias chuckled. "I would say that is an accurate account of most of us, but not all."

"Yourself included, I would think," Leonard said, laughing as well. "Or Lily wouldn't be with you. Great judgment this girl has."

_You'd be surprised,_ Lily thought bitterly and frowned as Severus flashed across her mind. Even worse, she cringed when she glanced at Elias; a smirk was tugging at one side of his mouth, indicating that he was probably thinking the same.

"Dad, we're not—"

"Oh, yes you are," Leonard cut her off with a smile. "A dad can always tell with his daughter." He then glanced at Elias. "You don't need to pretend; Elias here looks like a respectable lad."

"Thank you, sir," Elias said with an easy grin.

"But in case you aren't, I do have a shotgun in the back shed," Leonard said warningly. "Not a threat, just an FYI."

"Dad!"

"Leonard!" Sophia appeared in the doorway, her arms folded across his chest.

"Just joking," Leonard said as he finished putting away the groceries.

"Not funny," Sophia said sternly, but her severe expression softened as she walked into the kitchen. "Now, instead of threatening Elias, you should be upstairs putting your suit on. You'll make us all late."

Leonard grumbled as Sophia pulled him out the kitchen and up the stairs. Lily couldn't help but smile; her father had always hated formal dress. She then turned to Elias.

"Sorry about that," she said sheepishly.

He shrugged, and Lily grew nervous at how quickly his friendly demeanor had diminished with the departure of her parents.

"It's to be expected," he said, shoving his hands in his pockets and shifting around.

Lily sighed at his obvious unease. The day had taken such an unpleasant turn in such short time. And despite whatever Elias said about everything being fine, she would have to put her plans for tonight on hold. She just wished she knew what the hell he was thinking.

"Elias?"

"Yeah?"

"You sure everything's okay?"

"Yeah," he said and smiled genially. "How about that tea?"

"Sure," Lily said, relaxing a little as she gathered a couple of mugs.

_It will blow over soon_, Lily thought as she turned her back to Elias and reached for a teapot. She tried to convince herself that it was just the initial shock of finding out about an ex, but deep down, she knew it was more than that. Severus was not the typical ex-boyfriend, and any boy in Elias' shoes would react the same way, if not worse.

A burst of anger shot through her as she thought about how, _again_, Severus continued to be a distressing constant in her life. He would probably glow with satisfaction if he knew.

Lily had to completely cut Severus out of her life. She had begun this summer, but when school began, she had agreed to continue Potions lessons with him, despite knowing it would not be the best for either of them. But she was afraid to let it go.

Regardless of the fact that their friendship was essentially non-existent now, she found a strange comfort in those meetings. Since their Fourth Year, she could always count on Severus being there every Friday night without fail to listen to her ramble on about classes, to comfort her when she and her roommates rowed about the silliest things, and to guide her through their projects.

But she couldn't depend on that anymore. Things had changed too much. There would never be that sense of consolation and support between them again. Lily had to end it.

_And I will_, she thought with a new ferocity as the kettle whistled with boiling water. _For the sake of my own well-being and present and future relationships, I will end it._


	12. Out with the Old Part II

Since when did sitting at the dining table and eating dinner become so strenuous?

Isabella was concentrating so hard on controlling her breathing that she had barely eaten any of the mouth-watering and expansive feast that their house-elf, Nonie, had prepared for their guests.

She took a small bite of roasted chicken and glanced up at the boy—no, the _man_—who was causing her skin to glow with warmth, her heart to beat twice its normal pace, and her blood to course through her with crackling anticipation.

Garret.

To say she was nervous this morning was an understatement. She had spent more than an hour staring at her closet debating what to wear. She didn't want to look as if she put a lot of thought into it, but still wanted to look attractive. In the end, she picked a simple black sweater that could be considered a little lower cut than normal and a pair of dark jeans that maybe fit a little too snuggly.

Her hair was another issue. She styled and re-mussed it at least ten times. She finally ended up pulling it into a low, sleek ponytail—Garret had always liked her hair out of her face. Playing up her eyes—Garret's favorite feature—she kept the rest of her makeup light and dabbed a bit of her mother's jasmine perfume behind her ears.

Isabella had stood near the stairs behind her father when the doorbell rang around 2:00 in the afternoon. Beneath her anxiety over seeing Garret, she was genuinely excited to see the family whose lives had been so intertwined with hers for as long as she could remember. Besides, they would definitely help buffer and dispel some of the imminent awkwardness between her and him.

So imagine her surprise when Derrick opened the door to only Garret and Allen, his father, standing on their doorstep.

"Ah, Sonia and Serena tried to be adventurous last night during dinner in Paris," Allen had answered when Derrick inquired about the twins and Bianca, his wife. "Ordered the escargot despite our warnings and have been up all night sick with food poisoning. They're feeling better after a couple of tonics but still feel a little weak after the ordeal. Bianca is back at the hotel with them."

He then swept Isabella into a firm hug with an equally hearty greeting. He was then followed by Garret. Isabella's mouth hung slightly open as her ex-boyfriend, who had grown at least six inches in the past six months, had broadened in the shoulders quite a bit, and had taken to letting his stubble grow, greeted her with a grin and hug. Isabella nearly drowned in his masculine scent that she remembered so well.

They all then spent the time before dinner sitting in the parlor and catching up. Isabella had never been so aware of herself sitting there on the sofa just a couple of feet from Garret. Her posture was perfect, her head was held high, and her hands sat clasped in her lap to keep them from fidgeting. From the few sneak glances she stole of him, he seemed calm and relaxed, which further unsettled her. He was either hiding his anxiety well or wasn't fazed by this situation at all, which could be a good or bad thing.

And now here they were, eating dinner and sitting across from each other. They hadn't spoken a word to each other after their initial greeting, as their fathers were asking them both questions about school and nearly everything else. Though, Isabella had a feeling she would be charged with entertaining Garret once they were done. At the many gatherings their families had shared before, their father's had a penchant for excusing themselves after dinner for a strong drink and serious political talk.

"Well, Isabella, sounds like you're enjoying yourself at Hogwarts considering all things," Allen said after Isabella finished describing her experience so far at Hogwarts at his request. He gave a satisfied sigh as he removed his napkin from his lap and pushed his plate away. "Spectacular dinner, Derrick. Might have to look into getting a house-elf of our own. What say you, Garret?"

Garret shrugged noncommittally. "Mom might get offended."

"Good point," Allen said with a chuckle.

"Or she could see it as a very considerate gift," Isabella offered as she placed her fork and knife across her plate. She had given up attempting to eat as a bad job. "I know my mom certainly would have, but she was dreadful at domestic charms and housekeeping."

"Yes, but Estelle was a special case," Derrick said with a grin. "The majority of your gender though, and I mean no offense, dear—" Isabella rolled her eyes "—would most certainly be offended."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it," Isabella said with feigned exasperation. She stood and began to clear the table just as Nonie appeared to help. Isabella carried a few dishes into the kitchen despite Nonie's insistence that she stop and enjoy her company.

A few minutes later, Isabella made her way back to the dining room to find it empty save for Garret. Her heart immediately regained the frantic pace it had set the minute he had walked through the front door earlier today.

"They've already retreated to Derrick's study," Garret explained when she reached the table.

"That was fast. Must be a new record," Isabella mumbled.

Garret grinned. "True, but at least now we can finally talk freely."

Isabella's throat went dry. _Talk freely about what?_ she wondered.

"Want to head outside?" he asked as he stood.

"Sure," Isabella said, her voice a little shaky. "Though we should get something warm first. It's been freezing since the snow fell yesterday."

They went back to the kitchen where Nonie conjured hot cocoa for them. With Garret's consent, Isabella added a shot of her father's peppermint schnapps to give it a kick and with the secret hope it would help calm her nerves.

They then went outside to their backyard, a magically enlarged space that would otherwise never exist in the center of Muggle London. In the days before Christmas, Isabella and her father had decorated most of the house and outside with bushels of pine garland, sparkling baubles, and glowing fairy lights. Isabella was delighted to see that their work in the backyard still remained, and she inhaled the invigorating scent of pine. The gold and green fairy lights reflected beautifully on the fresh snow.

With his wand, Garret melted a path through the snow to a bench near their rose garden that was now just a mass of bare branches. He then warmed the bench and sat down. Isabella precariously did the same next to him.

"So really, how are things?" Garret asked after a few moments of silence.

Isabella shrugged. "As good as can be expected when you move to a new country and start at a new school. It's really how I described it in my letter. I still stand out a bit, but the ogling attention has calmed down since the start of term."

"That's the good thing about teenagers: we are easily distracted when something else comes along," Garret said. "And I think these murderous nutjobs roaming about qualifies as a big something else."

"Yes," Isabella agreed, "but I would much rather still have a ton of attention on me if it meant said murderous nutjobs did not exist."

Garret nodded absently and said, "But if the murderous nutjobs did not exist, there would be no reason for you to be here, and you'd still be at Morgana."

They shared a significant look before Isabella bit her lip and looked away. She stared at a glowing fairy in the bush closest to her that appeared caught in the branches. After a long sip from her mug, she turned back to him.

"So how is everything with you? Classes, Quidditch, captaincy?"

"Pretty well," Garret began, appearing to have let go of the previous moment. "We're currently second in Quidditch behind Wally Crick's team, but Chris is coming into his own as Keeper, so I hope to move past them soon."

"Chris is Keeper?" Isabella asked with disbelief. "Since when does he play Quidditch?"

"Since he grew nearly a foot over summer," Garret replied with a chuckle. "You must have noticed at your farewell party."

Isabella thought back to the Fourth of July and, indeed, did vaguely remember Chris being a little taller. But she hadn't thought much about it; she had been primarily concerned with Garret's absence, which had left her feeling both relieved and a little hurt that day.

"Yeah, he did seem taller," Isabella said eventually.

"He just kept growing after that and had filled out quite nicely by the time school started," Garret explained. "I was hesitant to try him out on my team knowing he had only played a few pick up games here and there, but he learned quickly and has been doing well since."

"Speaking of Chris," Isabella began with no pretense, "why did he end things with Nina? I know he's your close friend and you don't have to tell me, but I was really confused when I read that in Jasmine and Lana's letter."

"For the exact same reason he finally decided to try out for Quidditch," Garret said.

"You lost me."

Garret grinned. "Well, Chris had always been sort of…scrawny, I guess is the word to use."

"Agreed," Isabella said, laughing a little.

"And his new physique and accompanying new confidence did not go unnoticed when we returned to school back in August," Garret continued. "He was getting a ton of attention from a lot of girls, and so he just wanted to…explore his options."

"And not be tied down while doing it?" Isabella asked, feeling a mix of irritation and understanding. "At least he broke up with her first instead of trying to hide any potential cheating."

Garret nodded. "Yeah, he told Nina that he still cared for her and that maybe they could be together again eventually, but that their teenage years were not meant to be spent committed to one person, that they were meant to just go out and have fun with no regrets."

Comprehension dawned on Isabella. "Ah, so he expects Nina to wait around until he's finished having fun with other girls and ready to be with her again?"

"He never said that," Garret said somewhat defensively.

"Of course he didn't say it, but that's what he's thinking," Isabella said as she felt herself begin to get cold. "Imagine that you had broken up with me for the same reasons. Would you really be comfortable with the idea of dating, kissing, and doing whatever else with other girls, knowing I was out doing the exact same thing with other guys? Of course not. Guys have a possessive nature with a 'do as I say, not as I do' rationale."

A short moment of silence passed where Garret simply stared at her. Isabella realized that she maybe should not have brought up their breakup.

"You do have a point," Garret began in a quiet voice, continuing to stare at Isabella with an expression she couldn't discern. "We didn't break up for the same reason, but the thought of you with someone else over here is still upsetting."

Isabella swallowed hard. This was not where she was expecting the conversation to go. She had no idea what to say.

"Are you seeing anyone?" Garret asked suddenly.

Isabella simply shook her head, not trusting her voice.

"Interested in anyone?"

She hesitated. If she were honest with herself, the answer would be an obvious 'Yes,' but for some reason, she didn't want to admit it, not even to herself. She was afraid to endure the vulnerability and insecurity that always accompanied teenage crushes, especially when they involved boys like Sirius Black.

"So you _are_ interested in someone," Garret guessed correctly when Isabella continued to remain silent. "When are you going to act on this interest?"

"Never," Isabella said flatly.

"Why is that?"

"Because…because girls with common sense don't act on their interest for boys like him," Isabella explained, more for her own benefit. "We're a dime a dozen where he's concerned."

"I'm sure you're anything but," Garret said as he scooted closer.

Isabella looked up at him and smirked. "You have to say things like that as my ex-boyfriend. I don't mean to put myself down, but it's the truth."

"Then you'll just have to find a way to outshine the rest; he'd be a fool not to notice," Garret said with a genuine smile.

"You're sweet," Isabella said, "but I don't know if I want to put myself out there on a limb like that."

Garret opened his mouth to respond, but Isabella cut him off, not wanting to continue down this road of analyzing her nonexistent lovelife.

"Are _you_ seeing anyone?" she asked quickly.

A sheepish grin spread over Garret's mouth. "Yeah, I am."

Isabella cocked an eyebrow in question.

"Well," he hesitated, shifting his eyes, "I am dating Nina actually."

Isabella's mouth fell open, failing to hide her shock, anger, and hurt. It was a slap in the face to hear he was dating _Nina_.

"Wha—but Chris—" Isabella couldn't form a coherent sentence. She was glaring at Garret as if seeing him fully for the first time. Without thinking, she punched him as hard as she could in the arm.

But Garret only burst into laughter. "Isabella, I'm kidding!"

She continued to stare at him, still unsure of what to believe. He stopped laughing and looked insistently at her.

"Come on, Isabella, you know I would never date someone like Nina," Garret said.

She tried to keep her face hard, but her resolve slowly melted and she laughed. "You really had me going for a second. That would have been among the ultimate of betrayals."

"I would already be dead," Garret said. "Do you really think Lana or Jasmine would have let me get away with that? Or Chris for that matter?"

"True, I was beginning to think Lana and Jasmine were keeping it from me," Isabella said, but her original question still had not been answered, and she really wanted to know. "But, really, are you seeing someone?"

"Yes," Garret said seriously. "Penelope Smart."

"Ah, Penelope," Isabella said with a nod. She hadn't known Penelope well despite them being in the same year. They hadn't been roommates since their first year, and Isabella had never had a reason to think ill of her. Still, a twinge of jealousy knotted in her stomach.

"It's nothing serious," Garret went on, "but I won't pretend like I haven't enjoyed her company over the past couple of months."

Isabella nodded with a smile, but inwardly, she felt left behind. Not that she had expected Garret to take a vow of celibacy, love her from afar, and wait for her return, but hearing that he was beginning to move on was not what she had wanted to hear. She should have seen it earlier that his feelings were no longer the same, for he had called her 'Isabella' from the moment they arrived.

In this moment, Isabella realized that the main reason she had not fully recognized her attraction to Sirius was sitting right before her. Garret and their past was the reason she had not let herself show her interest in Sirius, the reason why she had been hesitant on sharing her crush with her roommates.

Garret was the last thing from home she had not properly let go of—their goodbye in his kitchen in early July had been forced and incomplete, he hadn't come to her farewell party, and she hadn't replied to any of his letters as promptly as she had promised. All of this made it harder to move on once she was at Hogwarts.

And as much as she refused to recognize it throughout the term, her reluctance or inability to move on was proven this morning in her overthinking her appearance and her silly plan to seduce Garret despite knowing she was interested in someone else and that there was the possibility he was with someone new. She instantly felt foolish, naïve, and conceited.

"You know, I'm going to be completely honest—I had every intention of kissing you tonight with the hope it would lead to more," Isabella said after a long pause, believing that getting everything off her chest would help her begin to let go. "And if you can believe it, my roommates—well, one really—even suggested that I try to seduce you into having sex just to get it over with."

Garret looked intrigued. "Well, I'll be honest with you too—it would have been very difficult to refuse you if you had tried."

Isabella couldn't help but grin.

"So where do we stand?" Garret asked. He had obviously noticed Isabella's silent distress over Penelope.

"Where we always have, as friends first," Isabella said. "Am I happy for you? Of course. Did it bother me to hear about Penelope? Yes, but it was exactly what I needed to hear."

"You know what else you need?" Garret asked as he scooted even closer.

"Hmm?"

In reply, Garret wrapped his arms around her waist, pulled her close, and kissed her firmly on the lips.

Isabella stiffened at the sudden contact, but she immediately relaxed and kissed him back. As their tongues touched and her arms circled around his neck, Isabella's mind raced through the hundreds of these moments that they had previously shared. This kiss was just as amazing as those, but there was _that something_ missing, that tingling rush of overwhelming emotion that connected two people in love or, at the very least, infatuation.

When she realized what was missing, Isabella pulled back and smiled. _That_ was the reality check she had needed. It was a sad revelation, but she was finally on the road to letting go.

"Thank you," Isabella said once she had resumed normal breathing.

Garret stared back at her with a curious expression, but his face eventually broke into a grin.

"Glad I could help," he said proudly, and Isabella felt the need to punch him in the arm again.

"You are such a prat," Isabella said through a laugh.

"What's a 'prat?'"

Isabella rolled her eyes. "Nevermind."

"Miss Isabella?"

Isabella looked over Garret's shoulder to find Nonie approaching them and shivering slightly.

"Yes, Nonie?"

"Sirs Derrick and Allen wish for you to come back inside for some dessert," she replied as she took their empty mugs from their hands before either could react.

"Of course. Thank you, Nonie," Isabella said, inclining her head. "We will be there in a minute."

Nonie bowed before scurrying off. Garret stood and looked after her with a puzzled grin.

"Maybe it wouldn't be so bad having one of those around," he said thoughtfully. "I'm sure my mom would get over the initial offense when she discovers how much free time a house-elf would give her."

"It is pretty nice having Nonie around," Isabella said as she also stood. "Though, it is still awkward at times having someone else do the chores I am perfectly capable of doing. Makes me feel lazy."

"Eh, that feeling will wear off soon."

"Already starting to," Isabella admitted guiltily.

Garret smirked knowingly. "Shall we?" he asked, proffering an arm toward her.

Isabella nodded, grasped his arm, and followed him into the house. It wasn't until they entered the warm dining room that Isabella realized how cold she had actually been outside. The hot cocoa and Garret had definitely seen to warming her up sufficiently.

While she happily ate her trifle and engaged in simple conversation with her father and guests, Isabella's mind replayed her talk with Garret over and over again. Tonight had certainly not played out as she had expected, but it was exactly what her heart and mind needed to start fully enjoying that part of her life in England.

And at the very least, her long drought was finally broken.

* * *

Most boring New Year's Eve party ever.

Sirius wasn't sure if this year's soiree in particular was crap, or if he was just getting too old to enjoy the excitement and anticipation that surrounded the start of a New Year.

Or maybe his boredom could be attributed to the fact that there was really no one else besides his current companion—Remus—to hang around with. And Remus had never been the boisterous partying type.

The only interesting episode to occur so far this evening was the arrival of Delilah and her parents, establishing the first meeting between them and the Potters. Delilah's mother, an assistant in a shop in Diagon Alley, seemed awestruck with the surroundings and guests. The Potter New Year's Eve party had always been known to be exclusive and intimate, and it was clear that Mrs. Peterson had never attended such an affair.

Mr. Peterson, on the other hand, seemed wary of and unimpressed with the whole event. He was a mid-level paper pusher in a nameless department at the Ministry, and Sirius assumed that he was probably uncomfortable with being in the home of the Head Auror with so many other senior directors and department heads.

After the awkward introductions, James whisked Delilah away for some alone time he had been complaining all week about. Sirius hoped James got whatever it was he needed from Delilah so that he would shut his whinging.

"You think this is it for the night?" Sirius asked Remus before taking a sip of his favorite cognac he had kept well hidden from Edward and Clarice. He and Remus were leaning forward against the railing of the first floor landing, looking down at the mingling guests below. It was the perfect spot to stay in the shadows and people-watch.

"What do you mean?"

"You mean you aren't bored out of your mind?" Sirius asked doubtfully. "Where's the fun?"

Remus shrugged halfheartedly. "What exactly were you expecting?"

"I don't know," Sirius said irritably. "It's just…different this year."

"I feel the same way," Remus admitted. "We could try chatting up a couple of girls."

Sirius laughed at the suggestion. He couldn't think of the last time _Remus_ had suggested flirting with girls. He decided to play along.

"And who exactly among this prolific crowd do you suggest we target on?"

"How about the Dagney twins? They've been eyeing you most of the night, and I'll be able to score the one you reject out of sympathy," Remus said.

"You're drunk," Sirius said through a laugh, and indeed Remus was working on his fifth pint of ale. "And the Dagny twins? They're old, and not the fetching kind of old, just _old_."

"And who would you consider the 'fetching' kind of old?"

"Rosmerta," Sirius said coolly, as if it were the most obvious fact in the world.

"Ah, how could I forget," Remus said. "Too bad she—"

But Remus didn't finish his thought as he suddenly stood straight and cleared his throat. He downed the rest of his pint and set it on one of the many small decorative tables lining the halls.

"Maybe we should go downstairs and try to enjoy ourselves instead of hiding out and complaining," Remus said in a firm voice before Sirius could ask what was going on.

Without waiting for a response from Sirius, Remus smoothed his dress robes and headed toward the staircase. Confused, Sirius looked down, and his eyes instantly found Keira and her parents greeting the Potters with hugs and a gift.

"This should be interesting," Sirius said with a smirk before finishing his own drink and following Remus downstairs.

Sirius found Remus in a busy room just off the entrance foyer. He was making a job out of pouring himself a new drink while surreptitiously throwing looks Keira's way as she continued to make small talk with her parents and the Potters. Sirius smiled a little; Remus was obviously interested, which hardly ever happened.

"Mind pouring me one?" Sirius asked as he reached Remus.

Remus nodded absently and handed Sirius a glass of mead.

"So how do we start enjoying ourselves?" Sirius asked after taking a small sip. He was watching Remus, who was trying hard to remain impassive. "I see Keira has arrived; maybe we could try chatting her up. Or maybe just you."

Remus looked at him sharply. "What are you implying?"

"Nothing," Sirius said casually. "But I think there's something I could by implying."

His faced only hardened. "And _I_ think you should go fu—"

"Good evening, boys," came a cheery voice from behind them.

They both turned to see Keira approaching them with a wide grin.

"Happy New Year's Eve!" she said before hugging them both with typical alacrity. "You both look very handsome; I don't think I've seen either of you so cleaned up," she said as she stepped back and gave them both a once-over.

Sirius couldn't help but grin. Keira looked very nice herself in gold dress robes. He had always had a soft spot for Keira since their snogging days back in fourth year. She was fun, easy-going, and a breath of fresh air compared to most other girls in their year. He could certainly see why Remus _would_ be interested.

"You look great as well, Keira," Remus said before Sirius could open his mouth. Sirius was shocked to hear his steady and calm voice. "Can I get you a drink?"

"Please, some mead if you don't mind," Keira said with a smile. Remus nodded and hurried back to the drinks table.

"So where are your other partners in crime?" Keira asked.

"James is off somewhere very well-hidden with Delilah," Sirius said, trying to veil the irritation in his voice.

Keira raised her eyebrows. "She's here?"

"Yes, she and her parents arrived a while ago."

"Her parents?" Keira repeated with a mischievous smile. "That must have been fun and awkward for them."

Sirius nodded. "Awkward definitely, but not too terrible. Her mother seems to be enjoying herself, but her dad's skulking around here somewhere."

"Hmm, I guess we now know where she gets her fun spirit from," Keira said dully, and Sirius chuckled. "Thanks, Remus," Keira said brightly with a wink as Remus returned and handed her the mead. "And Peter?"

"He was forced to spend the evening with the family of his soon to be stepfather," Remus said, still appearing at ease. Sirius silently commended his friend; if Remus did in fact fancy Keira, he was doing a good job at hiding it.

"Stepfather?" Keira repeated with an arched brow. "So she's given up on trying to find her husband?"

Sirius and Remus shared a loaded looked. The situation with Peter's missing father had always been a complicated one with many unanswered questions.

Cecil Pettigrew went missing over two years ago, without any trace or evidence. He had always been a capable wizard, which led many to think that he was taken by force. Others thought he staged the disappearance to escape from his unstable marriage and mounds of gambling and other debts that his wife and Peter had not known about until he was gone. Peter told Sirius, Remus, and James the story only once and never brought it up again, from which they learned to never talk about it.

"Looks like it," Remus said after a short pause. "He's some bloke from Romania or somewhere down there that she met on holiday over the summer with her sister."

"This past summer?" Keira asked with disbelief. "That was fast."

"Yeah, Peter can't stand him," Sirius said, feeling the usual pang of sympathy for his friend. "But he says they will likely pass out soon after midnight, so he will try to make it over here then."

"So where are your friends?" Remus asked before Keira could inquire more about Peter's situation. Sirius was glad he didn't have to be the one to ask even though he was just as curious.

Keira took a long sip from her glass as she thought. "Lily said something about a party with Elias and his parents, Jane is in Italy, of course, and I'm not sure where Isabella is. Other than the gift and short note I received from her on Christmas, we haven't talked since the train ride home."

Sirius frowned behind his glass. According to Clarice's RSVP list he found on the kitchen counter this morning, Mr. Derrick and Ms. Isabella Williams were expected to attend, but it was now past 10:30, which was late, even for a New Year's Eve party. He suddenly grew slightly annoyed with Keira; Isabella was her friend, after all. Why didn't she know where she was spending the night?

"So I guess it's just the three of us lonely buggers tonight," Keira said with a grin. "As long as you don't mind me tagging—Isabella!"

Sirius whipped around so quickly to follow Keira's retreating form that his drink sloshed in his glass and down the front of his black dress robes. Remus gave him a wary look before a small smirk spread across his lips.

"And should _that_ imply something?" he asked in a low voice.

"Bugger off," Sirius said crossly as he grabbed his wand hastily from inside his robes and cleaned the mess. He then stowed it away and looked up quickly to see Keira hovering around Isabella and her father as they greeted the Potters.

It was hard work trying to keep himself from smiling too much when his eyes fell on Isabella. She looked outstanding in midnight blue robes that gave him a much better idea of her figure, and her hair was swept to the side in an elaborate mess at the nape of her neck. He sighed as most of his bad mood that had plagued him all of today vanished. He wasn't sure what it meant, and sure as hell wasn't going to admit it to either Remus or James, but he was happy to see Isabella after nearly two weeks apart.

His annoyance returned, though, when he watched Keira whisk Isabella away into the parlor at the other end of the hall.

"Come on," Sirius said impatiently, leading the way down the hall. They barely avoided James' old, batty aunt Doris, who was calling their names, before stepping into the parlor. The room was brimming with guests, and Sirius had to search for a long moment before he found Isabella and Keira sitting in a couple of chairs near the fire.

"Why are we sneaking up on them?" Remus whispered as they slowly approached them in a roundabout way led by Sirius.

"So we can eavesdrop a little before revealing ourselves," Sirius replied. When Remus pulled a face, Sirius added, "Don't pretend as if you're not interested in what they're gossiping about."

"I'm not," Remus said indignantly, "and I refuse to trespass on their privacy."

Sirius shrugged. "Your loss." He then smirked when Remus made no move to turn back.

"You know, they're going to kill you—"

"Remus, dear, you're a Prefect, could you tell Mrs. Baggins here what it's all about?" a female voice from behind cut him off.

Both Sirius and Remus turned to see Clarice standing with Bonnie Baggins who had a fourth year son, Billy, in Hufflepuff.

"Of course, Mrs. Potter," Remus said politely. He looked back to Sirius with warning before heading over to the chatting women.

Sirius dismissed Remus' look and settled himself behind a fairly large flutterby bush near two gossiping girls. Keira was facing him, while Isabella's back was toward him.

"I didn't know _you_ were going to be here," Isabella said, sounding excited to see Keira.

"We're invited every year, as are most of the older families, and Jane's family too. But they never come; Jane's grandparents on both sides retired on the Italian Riviera and the whole family spends the entire Christmas holiday there," Keira explained. "She will come back extremely tan with endless stories about the food, weather, shopping, and boys. It's a lot of boasting, but I went with her last year, and I will admit it's every bit of splendor she claims it to be."

"Sounds divine," Isabella said at Keira's wistful smile. "So who else is here? Are the boys around?"

"Yeah," Keira said with a nod. "James, Sirius, and Remus. Peter is with family."

"Remus, eh?" Isabella asked suggestively, and Sirius instantly began to worry at her tone.

_She couldn't be excited to see _Remus_, could she?_ he wondered. He became even more confused when Keira blushed.

"Shh!" she said hastily with a quick look around. "I talked to him earlier, but only for a few minutes before you arrived."

"_And_?"

"And what?" Keira said coyly.

"You know what," Isabella insisted. "If I recall correctly, you are still determining if Remus is too timid for you. And what better time to find out than under the influence of champagne and New Year's Eve excitement?"

Sirius couldn't believe what he was hearing. Keira fancied Remus, or, at the very least, was interested enough to have shared with Isabella. Sirius didn't know what to think nor was he sure if he should say something to Remus, or let it play out on its own. After all, Keira was known for being fickle; who's to say she wouldn't be after James by the end of the night.

"I'll let you know after a few more glasses of champagne, but I want to hear more about your visitors, one in particular," Keira said. Sirius' interest in the conversation immediately increased.

Isabella said nothing, but she must have made a face because Keira squealed with delight.

"So Garret came then?"

Isabella nodded.

"And did you…"

"No!" Isabella whispered frantically. "But we—we kissed. I won't bore you with details, but we had closure, and it was exactly what I needed."

Sirius' face fell. So the ex had visited, and they had kissed. But what had Keira been implying? Sirius didn't want to think about it. And Garret and Isabella had had closure, so that meant…what exactly?

With a grunt of annoyance, he turned away from them. He hated that this girl he had known for a few short months had gotten under his skin to the point where he had been _missing_ her during holiday break, that he had taken to eavesdropping on her conversation in hopes to hear something about him, that her seeing her ex and kissing him was bothering him so much.

He took a few steps away from the bush, consumed in his thoughts, and bumped into Remus.

"Doesn't appear as if their conversation was anything you wanted to hear."

"Yeah," Sirius said shortly, trying to regain his composure. He mentally kicked himself for being such a nancy boy about the whole thing. He started to head out the parlor, but Remus roughly grabbed his shoulder and turned him back around.

"You're not going to be a total arsehole after listening in on their conversation," Remus said in a tone that brooked no argument. "I don't know what you heard that's got you all shirty, but suck it up."

Sirius glared at Remus as he quaffed his drink and set his glass aside. He then cleared his throat, smoothed his robes, and led the way back toward the girls. Keira saw them approach and her eyes lit up as she stood.

"Here they are," Keira said with a smile. Isabella turned around and smiled when her eyes found Sirius. Sirius, however, kept his face impassive.

"Hey guys, how were your Christmases?" Isabella asked she stood and gave Sirius a quick hug. By the time he realized her arms were around him, she had moved onto Remus.

"Same old, same old," Remus said. "And yours?"

"Alright," she said, keeping her eyes on Remus. "Just different being here."

"Different isn't always bad," Remus said genially, and Isabella smiled graciously. Sirius had to refrain from rolling his eyes. Remus somehow always knew what to say, which was sometimes exasperating.

"Can I get you some champagne?" Remus asked.

"I think we all could use a drink," Keira said before Isabella could answer. She then looked at Remus with a grin that had him stuttering.

"Su—sure," he said before turning to Sirius with a perplexed look. "We'll be right back."

Sirius stared after them as they walked out of the parlor and out of sight. Isabella cleared her throat, which called his attention back to her. She was looking at him with cautious interest.

"You're mighty quiet," she said as she sat down again. "It's New Year's Eve, what could have you in a bad mood?"

"You'd be surprised," Sirius mumbled as he sat in Keira's seat. He didn't look at Isabella, though. An internal conflict was raging within him right now. He wanted to engage her, make her laugh, and show her a good time, but the thought of her _visitor_ was still bothering him.

"Well, try to snap out of it," Isabella said sharply. Her tone caught him off guard, and he looked at her, but she was grinning. "Come on, what's the matter?"

"Nothing," Sirius said petulantly, and he realized that he sounded like a ridiculous child. Isabella frowned at him slightly, shrugged, and turned away.

"Sorry," he said hastily, not wanting to alienate her. "It's just been a weird holiday. First one away from home and all. Kind of like you, I guess."

"It's easier if you don't think about it," Isabella said in an understanding tone. "And tonight is one of celebration, so let it go, if only for the night."

Sirius considered her words. Despite the fact that being away from his family wasn't really bothering him, she was right. He needed to let his irritation go and enjoy the party.

"You're right," he said after a quiet moment. He then fully looked at her and smiled. "It's good to see you."

"You too," she said. "You're looking quite handsome in your dress robes, but I guess I shouldn't be too surprised; I always figured you would clean up nicely."

Sirius swallowed hard at the compliment. "And you look—"

"Don't," Isabella cut across him, laughing and holding a hand up. "I wasn't fishing for compliments."

"But it's the truth," Sirius insisted with a smile. "You look…magnificent."

The word caught Isabella off guard, but she eventually smiled. Before she could respond, however, Remus and Keira returned with four glasses of champagne.

"We were thinking we should head to where it's less crowded," Remus suggested, handing a glass to Isabella.

"Sounds good to me," Sirius said. He finished his champagne in two gulps, set his glass aside, stood, and strode out the parlor ahead of the rest. He dodged the increasingly drunk guests and roaming house-elves with food platters, made a few turns, and finally saw the doors leading out to the deck and backyard. It would be freezing outside, but he would welcome the fresh air.

The others joined him on the deck within a few minutes, but to his surprise, Isabella sat near him on a lounge chair, while Remus and Keira continued down the steps into the backyard.

"What's that all about?" Sirius said, jutting his chin toward the retreating couple.

"Keira asked if they would be able to see any fireworks from anywhere, so Remus is taking her to some higher ground," Isabella explained.

"Oh," Sirius said. He was sure Remus was taking her to the small hill just beyond the turn of the path into the woods. "You weren't interested in seeing any fireworks?"

"They're usually all the same, aren't they?" Isabella said with shrug. "Besides, trudging through that slushy snow doesn't seem too appealing."

Sirius looked down at the mess that the recent snow had become. This had certainly been a weird winter, with unseasonable warmth and more rain than snow. Sirius was inclined to believe that it meant something beyond the obvious, but he dismissed it as old Divination concepts trying to sneak in on his brain again.

He turned back to Isabella and sat in the chair across the small deck table from her. "And what else is that about?"

Isabella raised her eyebrows in question. "What do you mean 'what else?'"

"Keira is acting…" Sirius trailed off. Keira was indeed acting odd, but it wasn't odd for her. She was flirting with Remus, that much was obvious and typical of her nature. The question was _why_.

"Let me start again," he said after shaking his head a little. "Does Keira fancy Remus?"

Isabella didn't even try to deny it; her grin gave it away immediately. "I don't see any harm in telling you for some reason. Keira is…interested in Remus and is using tonight to gauge what his feelings are before making a move since, according to her, he never would."

"Correct in that assessment," Sirius said. "She could dance completely naked in front of him with nothing but chocolate sauce on her chest that read 'I fancy you, Remus Lupin,' and he still would hesitate to make a move."

"I think anyone would hesitate out of the sheer absurdity," Isabella said with a laugh. "But, tell me, is she wasting her time?"

Sirius cleared his throat. "I wouldn't know. Remus and I are—well, we aren't the chummiest of pals. James would probably know before me."

Taking a sip from her glass, Isabella nodded slowly. Sirius thought she was going to ask prying questions, but she moved the conversation onward instead.

"Well, either way, we'll know by the end of the night, won't we?"

"Indeed," Sirius mumbled as he took out his hidden flask filled with his favorite cognac. "So anything exciting happen over break; any visitors from home?"

The question burst from him before he could stop himself. The talk of Remus, Keira, and their potential hookup had him irritated again for some reason. He avoided Isabella eyes as he took a long swig from his flask but knew she was eyeing him carefully. He wondered if she would tell him the truth or not.

"Yes," Isabella said brusquely. "Some family friends from the States came to visit during their tour of Europe. One of which was my ex-boyfriend."

Her directness had him coughing a bit on his drink, and his attempt to remain unfazed was useless. He hastily wiped his mouth and looked directly at her.

"Ex-boyfriend, eh?" Sirius said, trying to regain his coolness. "Must have been uncomfortable."

"It was," Isabella confirmed. "We never had a proper goodbye before I left, and I had been avoiding replying to his letters all term."

"Why, about the letters I mean?"

Isabella shrugged helplessly. "Don't know. Maybe because it still hurt a little, or maybe it was my way of not fully accepting the move. Regardless, we had a good talk, and I am happy to move on from it."

"So now what?"

She gestured noncommittally. "Find a new boyfriend, I guess. Have anyone in mind?"

That certainly caught him off guard. He cleared his throat uncomfortably and took another swig before his mouth broke into a smirk.

"What about that Adam guy? He seems _very_ interested."

Isabella rolled her eyes and tried not to smile. "Think you're funny, don't you? I would date _anyone_ before even looking at Adam." She finished her champagne and set the glass on table. "Even you," she said with a challenging smirk as she stood and headed back into the house. Sirius could see her shivering a little.

He stared after her, dumbfounded at her overt flirting. Was this closure with Garret all she had needed for her true self to come out, or was she just drunk? Sirius couldn't be sure, but he was intrigued all the same.

After a few minutes of silent contemplation, Sirius stashed his flask back into his pocket and went back into the warm house. He didn't see Isabella upon first glance, but figured a bit of distance for a while would do him some good while he figured out what he wanted to do, if anything.

He wandered around and chatted with Clarice's distant cousins who had always so admired him. Giving them a little attention always sent them into a blushing frenzy, especially after a few cocktails, and he usually walked away from their conversations with a few Galleons for his trouble.

Midnight was only a few minutes away when he found Isabella again. She was in the parlor, standing with Keira and two guys he vaguely recognized as younger Aurors just starting the training program. He then spotted Remus skulking in a corner not too far from the chatting group.

"I see you made it back from your talk with Keira, if that's what you were really doing," Sirius said as he approached his friend.

"It was," Remus said dryly.

"Mm-hmm, about fireworks."

"Among other things."

Sirius nodded absently as he watched the girls laugh at a joke told by the taller one. He then looked back at Remus.

"She fancies you, by the way," Sirius said inclining his head toward the girls. "Keira, I mean."

"And how do you know that?" Remus asked suspiciously.

Sirius grinned mischievously. "A little bird told me."

"Well, I don't believe it," Remus said flatly. "Yeah, she's flirting more than usual, but this is Keira we're talking about."

"Your loss," Sirius said with a shrug. "But I am not going stand here and watch a couple of berks chat them up."

But before Sirius could make his way over, the girls began walking toward them. Sirius tried to keep from grinning when he and Isabella made eye contact. Out the corner of his eye, Sirius saw Remus stand up straighter.

"Almost that time," Keira said when she and Isabella reached them. "Should we get some more champagne?"

"No time," Remus said, glancing at his watch. "Luckily, Sirius and I are always prepared." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a flask of what Sirius knew was firewhiskey. Sirius did the same.

"Would you like to share?" Sirius asked Isabella. He drank a little and passed the flask to her.

She took it and gave it a sniff. "Your favorite blend?"

He nodded, happy that she had remembered. Isabella took a deep breath before taking long swig. She wiped her mouth, pulled a face, but then grinned.

"You know, that wasn't so bad," she said with surprised delight. She took another small sip before handing the flask back to him.

"Glad you like it, but you have to go slow with it; it'll hit you fast," Sirius said, swallowing hard when she licked a stray drop from her lip.

"Well, it'll make for a more interesting night, don't you think?" she asked as the countdown from ten began.

Sirius didn't answer but glanced over at Keira who was giggling as she drank from Remus' flask. He was smiling and looking relaxed.

"FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO, ONE! HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

Sirius couldn't help but grin as people broke into "Aulde Lang Syne," cheered and clapped, or shared kisses of well wishes.

He looked back at Isabella who was cheering and popping a cracker. He finally caught her eye, and she stepped closer to him and smiled.

"Happy New Year, Siriu—"

But the distraction that her grabbed her attention had also grabbed his. Keira had thrown herself at Remus and was kissing him with extreme enthusiasm. Remus, who must have been in shock, stood stock-still with his arms stiffly at his sides. Sirius wanted to smack him for being so stupid.

Keira must have realized that Remus was not responding and pulled away. Her face was full of humiliation as she took in Remus' blank stare. She sighed heavily before rushing out the parlor.

"Re—" Sirius began to say, but Remus shook his head and held a hand up.

"Excuse me," he said dully without looking at either of them. He then headed out the parlor as well.

Sirius wondered if he should follow him, but immediately thought better of it. He turned back to Isabella, who was looking at him with bewilderment.

"That was definitely unexpe—"

This time Sirius cut her off.

With his lips.

He had felt the sudden and irrepressible urge to kiss her, and within seconds, Isabella was kissing him back. She brought her arms up to wrap around his neck, and with his hand on her lower back, he pulled her closer. She sighed contently, which spurred him on to brush his tongue against her lips. He could taste a fusion of his chocolate-infused cognac and champagne.

He so badly wanted to deepen the kiss. Her lips fit so perfectly with his own, and he was sure a simple kiss had never caused the surge of excitement coursing through his body right now. But something was holding him back. Before he could question it, Derrick's approaching figure caught his eye, and he instantly broke the kiss and took a step back.

Against his better judgment, he looked down at Isabella who was staring up at him with a mixture of uncertainty and delight. Her lips curled into a small playful smile that had him wanting to kiss her again. She opened her mouth, but before she could say anything, her father's voice rang out.

"There you are, Isabella!"

She turned around swiftly and Derek swept her into a hug.

"Happy New Years, Dad!" she said, somewhat distracted.

"Same to you, dear," Derek said, his voice soft and a little shaky. "I know this last one wasn't the best year, but we still have each other, and I am so happy and grateful to have you here with me, safe and whole."

"Oh, Daddy," Isabella said, her own voice breaking a bit as she buried her face into his shoulder.

Sirius hastily turned away from the private moment. Not wanting to face what just happened when they finished their embrace, he walked out of the parlor, through the stumbling guests, and up the stairs, away from the party.

As he walked further down the hall, the sounds of the party began to die away. He finally reached James' room, not surprised to find Remus pacing and grumbling but genuinely surprised to see James there, doing the same. He had discarded his dress robes, and his shirt and tie underneath were loose. Sirius closed the door with a snap, which drew their attention.

"Now, I know why Remus is here," he said with a smirk that Remus returned with a scowl, "but don't tell me you and Delilah are having trouble in paradise."

"She's fucking barmy," James said, stopping his pacing and falling onto his desk chair. His agitation was palpable, and Sirius knew he was drunk. "We were up on the roof—you know the flat part above the library—surrounded by a warming charm, drinking wine, and talking, just enjoying the night. And two minutes before midnight, she brings up her Christmas gift."

"She didn't like the first editions of _Hogwarts, a History_ and _Quidditch through the Ages_?" Remus asked. Sirius thought he heard some mocking in his voice.

"She loved them," James said flatly. "But then went on about how she had been _hoping_ for something that signified our relationship, like, and I quote, 'a necklace, bracelet, or something along those lines.'"

"Jewelry?" Sirius asked with a frown.

"Yes, _jewelry_," James repeated with disgust. "We've been together for two months and she wants _jewelry_. I was with Katie Darringer for five months, and I never gave her anything…except alcohol."

"And your dick," Sirius added sardonically.

"Which appeared to have been enough," James said, taking no offense. "She never complained."

"So what did you say?" Remus asked. He had stopped his pacing as well and was sitting on James' bed.

"Exactly what I felt—that I didn't think it was appropriate so early in our relationship, and that I care about her and think our current pace is just fine." James rubbed his hands harshly up and down his face, took out his flask, and drank its entire contents.

"And then?" Sirius prodded.

James sighed as he dropped the flask unceremoniously to the floor. "And then she had the decency to look somewhat ashamed, apologized, and mumbled something about finding her parents before rushing off as fast as she could manage down the vines on the side of the house. By then the fireworks from across town were already going off; we had missed the countdown, arguing over stupid Christmas gifts." He then snatched off his tie and threw it carelessly toward his hamper. "So I followed, but I couldn't find her. Came up here and found Remus in his mood." He ignored Remus' glare. "What happened?"

"Keira, she…threw herself at me," Remus said, and Sirius hoped he realized how ridiculous he sounded complaining about it.

"And that angered you so much that you had to leave the party?" James said with mirth in his voice.

"It caught me off guard," Remus said tersely. "No girl has ever done that before."

"There's a first time for everything," James said as if explaining to a child. "I don't know if you fancy Keira or not, and you don't have to act on it if you don't want to, but you should, at the very least, find her and apologize for being an arsehole."

Remus glowered at James, but said nothing as he walked out the room and closed the door behind him.

James then turned to Sirius. "And what's your deal? I saw you kiss Isabella down there; something to do with that?" he asked, his words slurring a little. Sirius had always been baffled by how perceptive James was when drunk.

"Yeah, I kissed her, no big deal," Sirius said, taking Remus' spot on James' bed.

"Why don't you ask her out?" James asked after a moment.

"Why would I do that?"

James rolled his eyes. "Because you like her." He then held up a hand to stop Sirius' retort. "And I know you, Padfoot, so don't deny it. Though what I don't know is why you haven't pursued her yet, but I'll guess it's because she hasn't thrown herself at you." He smirked when Sirius looked outraged.

"What are you talking about?"

"You don't like making a move unless the girl has made it explicitly clear that she's interested, until she is following you around, practically begging for you to take her," James explained. "Which sort of makes you a little ponce, but we won't get into that."

"You're an idiot," Sirius said defiantly, trying to hide his discomfort at James' impromptu psyche analysis.

"Maybe so," James said as he kicked off his shoes, "but it doesn't mean I can't be right. So swallow your pride and get over yourself, stop playing hard to get, and ask her out before someone else does." He then stood and walked toward Sirius. "And get off my bed; I'm fucking exhausted," he said, shoving Sirius' shoulder roughly.

Sirius stood just as James fell onto his bed and rubbed his temples.

"You're not going to find Delilah and try to make things right?"

James made a derisive noise. "Not now, no point. I'm tossed, and she's being stupid. Won't solve anything."

"Well, enjoy your sleep," Sirius said, knowing James was a couple of minutes from passing out after finishing an entire flask of vodka in less than a minute. "I'll come back in a bit to make sure you're not dead."

James mumbled incoherently as Sirius headed back into the hall. He paused after closing the door, not sure what he wanted to do. He figured the best thing to do was to first find Isabella; maybe seeing her would help him decide.

He thought about James' words and thought maybe some of it was true, but so what? Why waste time on chasing girls that weren't interested in him? There was nothing wrong with waiting to gauge a girl's intentions.

_And what are Isabella's intentions_? he wondered as he walked back toward the party. There was still noise coming from the ground floor, but it had definitely decreased.

She had flirted with him a bit, but that could have stemmed from anything. However, she did seem pleased after their kiss—the kiss that still had his lips tingling a bit.

Sirius immediately found Remus standing in the hall leading to the kitchen when he reached the bottom of the stairs. However, he was by himself with Keira—or Isabella for that matter—nowhere in sight.

"She around?"

Remus shook his head. "Just informed by Mrs. Potter that she and Isabella floo'ed back to Keira's house for some 'girl time.'"

"So basically to discuss what a couple of cads we are."

"Looks like it," Remus said cynically. "I guess I'll have my work cut out for me when we return to Hogwarts."

"What do you mean?" Sirius asked.

Remus suddenly looked shy. "I'm going to—to pursue this, that is if she is still interested." Sirius gaped at him. "Why not? It's the New Year, time for change, and all that rubbish. Couldn't hurt." He then shrugged and walked away.

The world had officially gone fucking topsy-turvy. Remus was planning to _intentionally_ catch himself a girl. If that didn't spur Sirius into action out of sheer competition, he wasn't sure what would.

He headed back out to the deck, reveling in the crisp cold air, and thought about James' and Remus' words. It was the New Year, after all, and maybe he could do for some change. Maybe he could put himself out there and make the first move…and maybe get rejected and embarrassed in the process.

_Hmm,_ _maybe not_.


	13. Lovers and Friends

The intensity with which James was glaring at the wooden ring had him convinced he would accomplish snapping it in two with his mind before he would ever achieve the feat of Apparating into it.

He just didn't understand why he was having such a problem with Apparition. It was just an advanced extension of Transfiguration, the one subject he highly excelled in. Not that he expected to achieve perfect Apparition during their first lesson, but he thought he should be feeling _something_ internally as he continued to practice.

But James knew the main reason he wasn't anywhere close to Apparating was because his mind was not in it. He had the _determination _and _destination_ down, but the necessary _deliberation_ escaped him at the present moment. There were just too many thoughts zooming through his head right now.

Only a week had passed since their return to school, but it had been an odd one.

Delilah had sought him out after their first dinner back on Sunday evening. They hadn't spoken to or seen each other since New Year's Eve. They immediately retreated to the Room of Requirement, where they had a short talk and a long snog. Things were better, but James could tell that she still felt somewhat justified in her expectation of jewelry. She had closed herself off a little bit to him, and James wondered how long his patience would stand it.

With no pretense, Remus had asked Keira to take a walk with him after lunch. James wasn't sure where they went or how long they were gone, but the next morning Remus shared with James only, in the most nonchalant tone he could muster, that he had asked Keira out on a date to take place tomorrow, Sunday. James didn't know what Remus had planned, and Remus refused to share any more details. He was happy for his friend and hoped things would workout with Keira but nervous for him at the same time.

And Sirius had slipped back into the boorish mood that had plagued at the beginning of fall term. James had no idea what to attribute it to. James had thought he would pursue Isabella when they returned and that that would at least get him talking and joking again, but Sirius hadn't so much spoken a word to her as much as James knew. However, James did catch them sharing prolonged looks of _something_ more often that not across the table during mealtimes and classes.

Peter was off too. He didn't end up making it to the New Year's party and had been more or less silent on the happenings of his Christmas holiday. Peter just didn't seem happy, in a manner more serious then Sirius' current egocentric antipathy. If James were honest with himself, Peter had been off since Cecil's disappearance, but nowadays it was more apparent, and James had no idea how to deal with it or how to approach Peter. Beyond the superficial, James and Peter did not have much in common, and James was least close to Peter among his three friends.

James hated to think about it, but it was obvious that the whole dynamic of their group friendship was just off. They hadn't been this disjointed or distant since Sirius' 'prank' back during fifth year when Snape almost lost his life. James never thought he would ever forgive Sirius after that; hell, it was a daily miracle that Remus, the one who had had the most to lose, continued to treat Sirius with anything better than cold indifference, which was much more than what Sirius deserved.

Was it a natural occurrence as they got older, this drifting apart as they gained other interests? Was it just a phase that would end soon? James didn't know; his friendships once seemed so infallible, and the thought of them slowly disintegrating was overwhelming, especially during a time when keeping close friends you could depend on was so important.

"Remember, you must see the ring in your mind and imagine yourself materializing inside of it," said Wilkie Twycross, their Apparition instructor. "Simply gazing upon it will get you nowhere."

James pulled his eyes away from his ring and glared as the little man strolled meters away from him. All this fruitless concentration was giving him a headache, and he decided that he was done for the day.

Looking around the Great Hall, he sought out his friends: Remus was still giving a full effort, Peter looked as if he had never started, and Sirius was standing with his arms folded, looking arrogant and bored. He caught James' eye and scowled with a glance toward his ring. James shrugged and looked away.

After a few more uneventful minutes passed, James began to wonder what would happen if he just left the lesson early. The professors certainly couldn't punish him, could they? After all, he did pay for the class and was here by choice. He didn't consider it giving up on Apparition, but he just no longer had the energy for it today.

Just as he was about to take his chances and make his way out the Great Hall doors, Twycross' voice carried through he hall, announcing the end of the lesson and congratulating everyone for a decent first day's effort. With a quick wave of Twycross' wand, the wooden rings disappeared, and the Heads of Houses dismissed the students.

James hurriedly made his way out the Great Hall surrounded by whispers of frustration from other students. He then continued up the marble staircase to Gryffindor Tower and went immediately to their room, ignoring calls from Corrine Yates who he knew was going to inquire about Quidditch practice.

A few minutes later, his roommates, save for Andy, joined him, looking equally disgruntled.

"What a bunch of bollocks," Sirius muttered as he fell onto his bed. "The 'Three Ds?' How the hell are they supposed to help us learn how to Apparate?"

"It's the same as any other magical theory. Just imagine them as the incantation," Remus said.

James tried with difficulty to keep from rolling his eyes at Remus' overly simple explanation.

"It's just advanced Transfiguration," Sirius said with obvious irritation. "We should be masters of this!"

"That's exactly what I was thinking," James said as he took out the latest issue of _This Week in Quidditch _to check the latest standings and stories on the Quidditch teams of Britain and Ireland. He knew he should start his homework, as it had dangerously piled up over the past week, but he didn't have the patience for it.

It had been snowing heavily nonstop since their return last Sunday, meaning no lingering strolls outside with Delilah, no Herbology classes, and no Quidditch practice. The building tension among the cooped up students was blatant.

Silence fell between them as they attended to their own activities. James hadn't realized that it was nearly dark outside until he looked up from his magazine to see Andy walking in. They weren't close friends, but even James could tell that something was wrong.

"What's up, Andy?" James asked as he sat up, knowing that Andy wouldn't divulge too much but still wanting to make sure it wasn't anything too serious.

James' voice seemed to call the rest out of their stupors. Andy sat down on his bed, rubbing his face roughly with his hands.

"It's Brianna," Andy said. "She's really upset." He then looked directly at James. "Has Delilah said anything to you about Tina Turpin?"

"Uh," James blurted, a little caught off guard. He thought back to the times he had spent with Delilah this past week. He did vaguely remember her saying something about her younger housemate, about how Tina had not returned to school after the Christmas holidays. "She didn't come back to school, right?"

"Yeah," Andy sighed. "Brianna's best friend. Tina wasn't on the train back, and I guess when her parents didn't show up to work for a few days, someone went to investigate."

_Bloody fucking hell_. James felt his stomach tighten a little at what he knew was coming next.

"They're gone," Andy continued, looking helpless. "The parents, Tina, and her little brother. Brianna's out of her head right now. Adam and I have been trying to keep her occupied and calm."

"Any idea what happened?" Remus asked.

Andy shook his head. "But according to my mum, the authorities think the Death Eaters and You-Know-Who have something to do with it."

James scrunched his face in confusion. "'You-Know-Who'?"

"Yeah, and his Death Eaters," Andy repeated with a nod.

Something then clicked in James' mind. "Oh, you mean Volde—"

"Don't say it!"

James was nearly startled off his feet at Andy and Peter's yells. They both had jumped off their respective beds and were looking at James with a mixture of fear and anxiety. Even more confused, James looked at Remus who was frowning at them, and then to Sirius who was looking at them with condescending skepticism.

"What are you on about?" Sirius said impatiently.

"Didn't any of you read the _Daily Prophet_ over the holiday?" Peter asked.

"No."

"No."

"A couple of articles here and there," Remus replied.

Peter rolled his eyes. "Then you would have missed the pretty big story on the Prewett brothers, their murder by Death Eaters, and an escaped spy who saw everything."

"The Prewett Brothers?" James' mouth fell open. The Prewetts had been Gryffindors not too long ago. They were well known among younger Gryffindors for their Quidditch prowess.

"What happened?" Remus pressed.

"There weren't many details about why or how, but apparently the Prewetts were part of some secret group fighting against You-Know-Who," Peter said. "And they, along with one other person, got caught up with some Death Eaters, and a battle ensued. The Prewetts were captured, but the third guy wasn't, so he tailed them to some hideout.

"There, the Death Eaters tortured them before You-Know-Who showed up, who was getting angrier and angrier because, despite everything, the brothers kept taunting them and using his name," Peter continued to explain. "Eventually they were killed, but the third guy was able to escape and immediately reported to the Ministry."

"Who was it?" Sirius asked.

"Are you mental?" Andy asked incredulously. "Of course they didn't reveal who the spy was. He would have been dead before he reached his home."

"What does this have to do with not using Vold—I mean You-Know-Who's name?" James asked quickly, trying to head off Sirius' retort.

"According to the spy's report, he doesn't appreciate others using it, doesn't think anyone else is worthy of calling him by his name, as that would mean they're on the same level as him," Peter said. "The spy said if anyone had seen the rage in his face when the Prewetts continued to say his name, it would be enough to scare them to death. By his account, not even his Death Eaters refer to him by his name. They call him 'my Lord' or 'master.'"

"So," Andy began, taking up the story, "the _Prophet_ warned the community against using it, that it may be jinxed or could easily mark you as an enemy of his regime, signaling your lack of respect for him. The paper itself will only refer to him as You-Know-Who or He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named from now on."

"So what if it marks those who use it as an enemy?" James said, not following the _Prophet_'s reasoning. "Everyone's just supposed to play into this stupid fear he's trying to create? Which, by the way, is exactly what he wants. How are people supposed to build confidence in the fight against him when they're too afraid to even use his name? My father never said anything about this, and it has to be one of the dumbest things to come out of the _Prophet_, which is saying something."

"Well, of course _you_ wouldn't understand," Peter said darkly, resuming his seat on his bed.

James eyed Peter warily, but before he could say anything, Sirius spoke first.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Sirius demanded heatedly.

"It means that you and James, like always, consider yourselves too above everyone else to care about what you probably deem as trivial fear," Peter said crossly. "Not everyone has an Auror as a father or extensive protection charms around their house like you, James. If you or Sirius had bothered to leave your precious bubble for a couple of hours during the holiday and ventured out to Diagon Alley, you would have seen how actually scared people are. We're in school and sheltered from a lot of it, but there are a lot more stories of disappearances and murders than what we read in the paper every morning.

"The Ministry isn't doing much or offering any explanation as to what exactly is going on or what they're doing to fight," Peter continued, and James could hear very controlled anger in his voice. "Which makes people even more frightened, especially with so many rumors running rampant. A lot of people had stopped using his name even before the damn _Prophet_ suggested it. But according to you, that's just people being cowardly."

James stared at Peter, feeling the need to defend himself and apologize at the same time. Peter had never blown up like this at him before, or at Sirius or Remus for that matter.

"What the fuck is your—" Sirius began before James cut him off with a raised hand.

Sirius glanced at him with a hard, questioning look, but James only shook his head. Peter, ignoring both of them, closed his bed curtains around him without another word.

Andy cleared his throat and glanced around, looking uncomfortable. He seemed to weigh his words before saying, "He's right, you know." He then frowned. "About everyone's fear, I mean," he added hastily. "People have stopped using You-Know-Who's name for a while now, and some don't even refer to him at all by these nicknames or his Death Eaters. I know it must sound silly to someone who _may_ be privy to more information than others. But even if people did have more information, they still might have the courage to act on it. You—all of you—are more daring than the common person. You'd fight if needed; not everyone would have the courage to do so."

Andy then grabbed his book bag from his trunk and headed for the door. "Gotta get back to Adam to help keep Brianna company in the library. See you guys later."

Silence stretched between them while they contemplated Andy's words. James felt somewhat slighted at the accusation that he believed himself to be above others due to his father's position in the Ministry. It couldn't be further from the truth.

And to suggest that James didn't care about how others felt about this war was downright ludicrous. He, too, was afraid of where the Wizarding world was heading, but it didn't mean he should close his eyes, cover his ears, and pretend that nothing was going on. But he wasn't going to run about crying over how scared he was, either. He had just as much to lose as anyone else, and he understood not everyone had the ability or desire to fight, but there was a difference between at least standing up for what you believe in and lying down to take whatever Voldemort planned to throw at you.

"It's true," Remus said, after sitting on his bed again. "I don't know why he included me, but you two definitely show no fear and have no problem fighting for what you think is right. Anyone who's seen you duel with Snape or Avery knows exactly where your allegiance lies."

"Yeah," James said, starting to get annoyed, "but there's a difference—"

"I know," Remus said pointedly. "But not everyone has the same thought process or priorities. Some people just want to do what they need to keep themselves and their families alive and safe, nothing more. And you can't necessarily blame them for it."

James sighed, knowing this discussion would just continue in the same circle. He looked at Sirius, who seemed determined to keep it going. One thing Sirius had little tolerance for was anyone who refused to stand up for themselves and what they believed in, be it good or bad. Sirius thought if he, at sixteen-years-old, could walk out on his family with death being a strongly possible outcome, then anyone should have no problem standing up for their beliefs.

"Let's just let it go," James said, a little exasperated. "I personally don't think I come off as someone who trivializes others' fears, but no matter."

"None of us think that," Sirius said a little louder than necessary with a glare towards Peter's bed. "Nor do _any_ of us belittle others' fear and mean no harm if perceived that way."

Peter remained hidden and quiet. Sirius rolled his eyes and picked up his magazine again. James looked to Remus, who shrugged.

"Why don't we discuss something more light-hearted, eh?" James said as he sat back down. "Like what to do this Friday for Sirius' birthday?"

Sirius put his magazine back down and gave James an annoyed look. "I told you guys I didn't want to do anything big. Let's just get some food and drinks from Rosmerta, lock ourselves in the room, play some cards and get pissed."

"But that's what we do every year, for all our birthdays," James whined. "It's fun and all, but you're the first one to turn of age; I feel we should do _something_ out of the ordinary. Let's invite some people up."

"Fine, do whatever you want. Just don't expect me to help with anything. You know how I like to spend my birthdays," Sirius said with a smirk as he went back to his magazine.

Remus made a derisive noise that Sirius ignored.

James certainly did know how Sirius liked to spend his birthdays, which mostly included basking in his own self-importance.

Sirius had always slept in before waking up to an inordinate amount of presents on his bed, came to breakfast late where a plate had already been filled for him by one of his many admirers, received an even more excessive amount of birthday cards from nearly every girl within two years, arrived late and paid no attention during class if he didn't outright skive off to spend a couple of hours with whoever was his girl at the time or just sleep some more, and had never been reprimanded for any of it. James couldn't help but admire his audacity.

"No problem," James said, slightly resigned.

* * *

Lily checked her watch and sighed. It was nearing 11:00, and she was exhausted. But fortunately for her, she and her patrol partner, Giles Wilkins, were nearly done for the night.

These were the times Lily disliked being a Prefect, when she had so much on her mind to work through but her duties had to take precedence. Sometimes patrols and meetings were a good distraction when schoolwork or things with Severus became too burdensome during their fifth year, but today had been a long day, and she just didn't have the patience to fake pleasantries.

Giles was nice enough. The sixth year Ravenclaw Prefect was a tall, rail thin, and pasty white freaky genius. He had received an 'Outstanding' O.W.L. in all twelve subjects offered at Hogwarts, received top marks in every class, and spent hours upon hours in the library researching everything about everything magical. Lily had thought he was an odd choice for a Prefect until she got to know him last year.

It was one of the things she liked about being a Prefect. People from other houses who were only classmates through fourth year became acquaintances and then friends, and in Elias' case, more than friends. As it turned out, Giles was more sociable than one would think.

"Ready for our next Apparition training session?"

Lily startled at the sound of Giles' voice. They had been walking in amiable silence for the past fifteen minutes.

"Oh," Lily said, regaining her composure, "er, somewhat. I'm happy to finally be learning, but that first lesson was frustrating. Don't you think?"

Giles nodded as they reached the third floor. "Definitely, but we'll pick it up eventually. Even the most inept wizards get their license, so—" He abruptly stopped at what sounded like table legs scraping across the floor.

Lily had heard it too; it was coming from the trophy room. She was instantly annoyed. They were so close to being done, and she didn't want to waste time admonishing troublemakers. She vaguely thought about ignoring it and moving on, but she knew Giles would never agree. He was a stickler for the rules.

"Shall we?" he asked, reaching for the door. When she nodded, he added, "Let's hope it's only Peeves."

Giles opened the door and walked in, Lily following close behind him. She had assumed her stern face in anticipation of doling out some harsh reprimands, but when her eyes finally adjusted to the dim light, her firm expression melted into shock and disbelief.

The troublemaker wasn't Peeves or even Potter and his lot. It was Charlie Davies standing in nothing but his undershirt and boxers, kissing and hastily undressing Jane, who was sitting at the edge of a table, her legs wrapped around his hips. They hadn't heard the Prefects come in.

"Oi!" Giles shouted, and the couple jumped and turned at the sound.

"Shit," Charlie grumbled as he began to pull up his pants.

Jane, however, remained still, her expression matching Lily's, though with a bit of fear mixed in. Color rose to her cheeks, and she finally looked away as she fumbled with the buttons on her shirt.

They finished dressing after a few uncomfortably quiet minutes. Charlie grabbed Jane's hand as she stood from the table.

"And that will be ten points each from Ravenclaw and Gryffindor this time," Giles said as they walked by. "I'm sick of catching you guys. Either get a better hiding place or cut it out."

Charlie rolled his eyes but didn't say a word. Jane looked at neither Giles nor Lily as they exited, and Lily was sure this was the first time she had ever seen Jane looking ashamed.

"So you've caught them before?" Lily asked when they were gone. She was still in shock but the anger was starting to build.

"Yeah, maybe three times. Once last week and twice before the holiday," he said, leading the way out. "I didn't take points those times because taking points from your own house is silly, and I really don't care what others are up to in the late hours, but it's getting old now. Charlie should know better; he's usually more careful."

"And so is Jane," Lily muttered, her mind still dealing with Giles' 'twice before the holiday' comment. How long had Jane been sneaking around with Charlie?

"Well, let's finish up," Giles sighed.

They finished their rounds after another thirty minutes, and Giles saw her to the seventh floor. She thanked him and bade him goodnight before continuing on towards the Fat Lady. She hoped that Jane was still feeling shamed enough to want to avoid Lily and, therefore, not in their dormitory. Lily did not want to deal with it now; she wasn't even sure what she would say to Jane or if she should say anything to her other roommates.

Lily entered the mostly empty common room. Only James, Remus, and Peter were still up, talking quietly near the fire. She ignored them before heading upstairs.

With a moment's hesitancy at the door, Lily entered their dormitory and sighed in relief when she saw Jane was not there, but was surprised to see Keira and Isabella still awake.

"Hey, Lily," Keira greeted, not looking up as she painted her toenails. Isabella looked up from her Charms book and smiled.

"Hi, girls," she said. She removed her robes, shoes, and knee socks before falling onto her bed.

"You look exhausted," Isabella said.

"I am," Lily replied, rubbing her eyes. "I'm surprised you two are still awake. Has Jane been by?"

"No," Keira said. "And we're still awake because you told us during dinner you desperately needed to talk to us after you were done with patrols."

Lily groaned and closed her eyes. After running into Jane and Charlie, she had forgotten about why she was so stressed.

"So are you going to tell us, or are we going to have to force it out of you?" Isabella asked.

Lily opened her eyes and saw that both girls had sat at the foot of her bed and were looking at her expectantly.

"Can we assume it has to do with Elias?" Keira asked, fanning her wet toes.

Lily nodded but remained quiet; she honestly didn't know where to begin.

Lily had known from the start what their little 'study session' would turn into the minute Elias had suggested that they spend their mutual free period in his room earlier. She had hesitated at first since they were both Prefects and responsible for projecting certain examples that did not include fraternizing in boys' rooms, but her anxiety abated when they entered the mostly empty Hufflepuff common room, where no one paid them any mind, and his completely empty dorm room. Besides, they hadn't had any proper alone time since returning.

While their session had begun with him reading Potions on his bed and her sitting at his desk reviewing Defense Against the Dark Arts, within twenty minutes she had joined him on his bed to help him with his Potions essay, and five minutes after that, she cast an imperturbable charm around his bed before lying underneath his body, which was positioned snugly between her thighs.

Since returning to school, Lily's relationship with Elias had been stronger than ever. She had fretted over his finding out about Severus and their previous relationship to the point that she ended up declining his invitation to his family's New Years Eve party. But they had written each other twice over the rest of the break, and by the time they returned to Hogwarts, it was as if nothing had happened, prompting Lily to not bother sharing the incident with her friends.

Neither of them had brought up the incident, but Lily didn't think Elias was purposely avoiding it. He seemed genuinely unconcerned with it all now. But Lily was worried that would change when individual Potions lessons were set to resume. Lily had promised herself that she would end the joint sessions, but she knew Slughorn would not like it, and Severus would know that he was the reason that she now wanted to study on her own.

"Well, we were, um…" Lily trailed off with a blush. She knew she would need to share the entire story if she wanted their sincere advice.

"We were messing around in his room," Lily said quickly, ignoring Keira's smirk, "earlier today. And after I, er, you know, he said—he said he loved me."

"What?" Keira and Isabella said together.

"I don't understand why you are so stressed; you're going to have to give us more details," Keira said.

Lily sighed, knowing how silly her story, or lack thereof, must have sounded. She thought back to Elias and his bed.

_She grinned as she reached for the button and zipper on his trousers. Though she had done this a few times before, she still blushed whenever she removed his trousers and pants. Two years ago, she could remember frowning and squirming as Jane shared with her, Keira, Harietta, and Mary about seeing Scotty Stiles' penis for the first time and subsequently bringing him to his knees with an exceptional blowjob, the first she had ever given. Everything about boys' nether regions had intrigued but frightened Lily at the time, and she believed she would never perform such a _gross_ act._

_But then Elias had come along, and Lily soon began to love rubbing and sucking him off. She loved how she was able to help him relax after a long, stressful day; she loved how he unraveled despite his best efforts to retain control; she loved the way her name fell from his lips with a mixture of desire and reverence, and she loved the way he looked at her during it all—it made her feel hot and shy and naughty and appreciated and wanted. How could she possibly refuse him?_

_Lily grinned again as she dragged her lips down his completely naked body. With some reluctance, he had lied down and let her take over. Without pretense, Lily had taken him into her mouth, reveling in his random twitches incoherent moaning._

_Her hands pulled and squeezed at his most sensitive areas, while his own hands began threading through her hair._

_As Elias reached his peak, Lily began to feel her own desire begin to build. She vaguely wondered how much time they had before their next class. Maybe sex behind his bed curtains wouldn't be so terrible._

_With a low grunt and whisper of her name, Elias came, hard and fast, and Lily had taken it in quickly without thinking, as she had learned was the best thing to do._

_But before she could regain her composure, Elias slightly sat up, gently grasped her around her neck, and pulled her toward him._

"_God, I love you," he whispered gruffly before kissing her fiercely._

_Lily's heart skipped a beat. She continued kissing him, but her mind froze. She couldn't believe that those words had come out of his mouth._

"So you think he was just caught up in the moment?" Keira asked after Lily told them a more detailed story.

"I don't know," she sighed. "Maybe, but then that doesn't make it better. Especially after the incident on Petunia's wedding day."

"What incident?" Isabella asked.

Lily bit her lip and told them about what happened.

"Ah, so now he knows about Snape?" Keira said. "And how did he act after he found out?"

"I knew that he didn't like hearing it, but he kept shrugging it off," Lily said, remembering the stiff way he had embraced her after affirming that he didn't care. "I mean, honestly, what boy would like hearing his girlfriend used to be held and kissed by Severus?"

"But you worked things out obviously," Isabella said. "You've been close since returning to school."

"We smoothed things over through letters during the rest of break," Lily explained, "but I can't even begin to tell you how upset I was about the whole thing. It's the real reason I didn't go to his parents' New Year's party." She had previously told the girls that she didn't go because she was feeling ill.

She pulled her legs into her chest and rested her chin on her knees, frowning a bit. "Even if he was caught up in the moment, that doesn't make me feel better. Things have just started to feel right with us again, and this flippant _declaration_ is going to complicate things."

"Did you say anything about it?" Keira asked.

"Yeah, what happened afterwards?" Isabella added.

"I pulled back from the kiss and stared at him. He stared back, looking slightly confused but…content. He obviously didn't recall saying anything," Lily said, thinking back to how disappointed she felt. "And I didn't say anything about it because I knew it would lead to a long discussion, but class was twenty minutes away, and we needed to freshen up."

The girls fell silent for a moment. Lily wondered what the other two were thinking.

Isabella was the first to speak. "Do you think his words upset you because maybe—do you love him?"

Of course that had to be the first question to be asked, the one Lily had been thinking about all day since their interlude, the one she was not ready to answer.

If she were honest, she was afraid to fall in love again. She had been in love only once before, and look at what had happened—she had been betrayed and humiliated, had lost her best friend, and it was still affecting nearly every aspect of her life today.

"I don't know," Lily finally said when she noticed them getting antsy for an answer. "I love everything about him. You've have heard me go on and on about him. Elias is simply…wonderful," she said with a sincere smile as emotion swelled in her chest.

"Maybe he meant it then," Keira said. "Has he done or said anything else over the past few days that may have shown that he might?"

Lily couldn't help grinning. Elias had, in fact, done something just earlier that day before she had gone down on him.

Lily had just unbuttoned his shirt when he made his move.

_He discarded his shirt quickly and removed his undershirt before leaning back over her and forcing her to lie down again, but Lily shook her head and pushed him back up._

"_I was undressing you a reason," she whispered, blushing furiously. "You have to let me finish."_

"_In a minute," he insisted, as he lightly forced her down again. Her protest died on her lips when his hands ran up her thighs, under her skirt, and against her knickers._

"_Ohh," she sighed as his hands began to move under the thin fabric._

"_Can I?" Elias whispered into her ear._

_Lily hesitated. Why was he asking? He had touched her here, under and over her panties, many times before. But then the thought of sex crossed her mind; he was, after all, hovering over her, nearly naked. And although she would be more than happy to oblige, she was now unsure about their current setting. Even with the imperturbable charm around his bed, there was still something too public about their first time together, and his first time _ever_, occurring in his dormitory._

"_C-can you what?" Lily asked, her breath hitching as his hands began concentrating on her most sensitive spot._

"_Taste you."_

_Lily's whole body had flushed. If he meant what she thought he meant, she knew she would just die. _

"_Wh-what?"_

"_Let me taste you," Elias repeated, leaning up to grin at her. "I promise you'll like it," he teased._

_Lily bit her lip, still unsure. Of course she wanted it, but the thought of him actually down there, in her most intimate area, unsettled her._

_But while she was still debating internally, Elias had already moved down, lifted up her skirt, and began slowly sliding her knickers down her legs._

"_Wait, I—"_

_Her qualms gave way to a shuddering breath when she felt his teeth nipping on her inner thighs. Her body was shaking in anticipation when Elias finally slid his tongue up the length of her slit._

"_Elias," Lily almost whimpered, her breath coming in short spasms as his tongue continued to probe her folds. It was the oddest feeling—soft and delicate but with just enough pressure drive her up the wall._

_Her heart was pounding, her blood was surging, and her mind was reeling. When he began to suck on her nub, her hands fisted in his hair. But before she could truly appreciate this sensation, Elias tentatively pushed two fingers inside of her._

Never_ had anything felt this incredible before. The pleasure was becoming too much. Her body started to shake again._

"_Elias, I think I'm going to—"_

Lily blushed as she remembered the feeling of warm honey flowing through her veins and tingling skin as her orgasm consumed her. Despite her distress now, a wave of desire surged through her.

_Elias chuckled deep in his throat as he licked his fingers clean and kissed his way back up to her._

"_So?"_

_Lily swallowed the lump growing in her throat. He was smiling down at her with the most endearing look she had seen, his lips shining slightly from her wetness._

"_It was…spectacular," she sighed as she cupped his cheek._

"_I promised you would like it," he said, a bit of smugness in his voice, but Lily didn't mind. "You taste delicious, by the way," Elias whispered into her ear. She could hear the grin in his voice._

Lily cleared her throat and took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. Keira and Isabella were staring oddly at her.

"You want to share whatever memory you were just reliving?" Keira asked.

"Well, just before I, uh—"

"Sucked him off, yes," Keira finished for her. Isabella laughed.

"Yeah," Lily said, narrowing her eyes a little, "Elias kind of—" she cleared her throat again "—went down on me."

Keira squealed and Isabella's mouth fell open.

"Which is a big deal, right? That's what Jane said," Lily said, trying to ignore the bit of anger that prickled at the thought of Jane.

"I definitely think so," Keira said. "Guys are so weird about it, and from what I've experienced, they usually only do it if they really care about you."

Isabella nodded. "In fact, the first time Garret ever went down on me was the first day he told me he loved me."

"Which makes this all the more confusing," Lily said, starting to get frustrated again.

"I don't think you should say anything to him," Keira said conclusively. "He might have realized by now what he said and is probably think of a way to bring it up to you, but until then I would leave it alone."

"Unless it continues to bother you…because that would mean that you love him, right?" Isabella said. "And that it hurts to think he said it in such a glib manner, you know?"

Lily chewed nervously on her bottom lip for a moment. "It would."

Another thirty minutes passed before the girls decided to turn in. They had moved on from Lily's issues to Keira and Isabella sharing a bit more about their experiences with Finlay and Garret, respectively. Jane hadn't returned, and Lily decided not to tell the girls about their earlier run-in.

Lily sighed as she settled into her covers, thinking about Elias, Severus, and _love_. Why did it have to be so complicated? She tossed and turned for a while, unable to get comfortable. She was still tense from the long day.

She let her mind wander back to the time spent in Elias' bed before things had muddled—his hands and lips on her breasts, her stomach, and between her legs. The ache in her center that began while she told her story to the girls was now throbbing persistently, and Lily knew she would have to satisfy it to finally relax. Not that she minded.

With a grin, she grabbed her wand from her bedside table, closed her curtains, and cast a silencing charm.

"Look at what you've done to me," Lily whispered as she slipped a hand under the band of her pajamas bottoms and knickers with Elias at the forefront of her mind.


	14. Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

Isabella tried not to chew on her quill as she stared at her essay on Gamp's Law for Transfiguration. It was really a terrible habit that her mother had constantly admonished her about and that Lily now had always commented on.

Speaking of Lily, Isabella glanced up and looked around the common room for her. Isabella had seen Elias approach Lily before lunch, and after some hushed words, they went out to the grounds. She hadn't seen Lily since and hoped everything was alright considering what had happened yesterday.

Isabella looked back to her essay, anxious to finish it before the weekend but lacking the necessary concentration. Besides Lily's boy troubles, Isabella had her own to worry about.

Frankly speaking, she was sick of Sirius. He had kissed her on New Year's Eve and then disappeared before they could acknowledge whatever was going on between them. That kiss, Isabella had decided after many nights of contemplation, had been more than just a friendly New Years peck on the lips. It had ignited that something that had been lingering between them for at least a month beforehand, but after her father swept her into a hug and Sirius vanished, Isabella had fallen from climax of their moment back into harsh reality.

And if she thought Sirius would make an attempt to clarify things with her upon their return to school, she had been sadly mistaken. The extent of their interaction had returned to that which had persisted after her confrontation with Dolohov. Besides 'Hellos' and 'Goodbyes' before and after Arithmancy, they really hadn't said a word to each other. Isabella had, in fact, stopped greeting him altogether, hoping he would get the point, but he had continued.

Isabella even went so far as to sit at the very front table in Arithmancy one day, assuming he would remain at their usual table in the back, but he joined her at the front table, without saying a word, of course. She was clearly too obtuse to see whatever point he was trying to make.

She was starting to think that she had taken it all too seriously. Maybe this was all a big joke to him, and he was waiting her for her to snap or throw herself at him. But if it were, Isabella didn't understand why. After all she had experienced and heard about Sirius' flirtatious and debonair personality, this stupid little game they were playing didn't make any sense.

Isabella had thought about making a move on her own, but her common sense had held her back. She also thought about trying to move on from this crush, thinking that she was holding on to that one little kiss because she was desperate for male companionship after officially ending things with Garret. But even as she thought it, she really couldn't convince herself. Isabella knew she wasn't just infatuated with Sirius anymore, and she was determined to see this _thing_ through until something happened or his disinterest was made plainly clear.

"Just one more day until the weekend," she muttered as she added another sentence to her essay. Barely two weeks had passed since their return to school, and Isabella was already anticipating Easter break. With all the chaos around her, she intended on making a solid effort to forget about Sirius, class, and all other stressors and truly enjoy her weekend that would begin with a clandestine visit to the Prefects' bathroom to enjoy a long, soothing soak, on Lily's suggestion and direction.

"Good afternoon."

Isabella looked up and grinned at Keira's cheerful greeting. Keira's exuberance had increased ten-fold in the short time they had been back at school, which Isabella knew was an effect of her time spent with Remus.

They had spent most of last Sunday afternoon together somewhere on the grounds. Keira didn't go into much detail upon her return, calling it 'too new' to start analyzing, but she did reveal that they had talked _a lot _and were taking things very, very slowly.

"So that means no more episodes of throwing yourself at him, I presume?" Isabella had asked with a smirk that Sunday night, referring to Keira's impromptu New Year's kiss.

She blushed. "No…well, not in public at least," Keira had said slyly. "And at least it put some fire under his arse."

Indeed, it certainly had, and Isabella couldn't help but feel a bit envious.

"Astronomy go well?"

Keira sat in a chair opposite Isabella's sofa and bristled. "I guess, but practicals are resuming tonight since the sky's cleared."

"You love Astronomy, though," Isabella said, though she had an idea of why Keira sounded bitter.

"I do when it doesn't interfere with my personal life," she said.

"Plans with Remus tonight?"

Keira blushed and tried to hide her smile. "He asked if I wanted to take a stroll this evening after dinner."

"You'll still have time before stargazing," Isabella said.

"Yeah, but I won't be able to enjoy myself as much with it looming over me," Keira countered.

"Maybe Remus will wait up for you, then," Isabella suggested. "Those boys certainly have no problem staying up late and roaming about."

"Don't I know it," Keira said in a sly, low voice.

Isabella didn't miss the hint. "Spill!"

"Not saying a word. Not yet," Keira said, giggling and shaking her head.

"Nothing serious, though, right?"

"No, I would tell you girls," she said, still grinning. "Like I said before: _very_ slowly."

"No longer too timid, then?" Isabella asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Still gauging, but I think his reticence is chipping away bit by bit," Keira said elusively. "He did, after all, properly apologize for the way he reacted on New Year's Eve."

"Really? What did he say?"

"He didn't _say_ anything," she said with a smirk.

Isabella shook her head. "You're infuriating," she said, chuckling a bit.

"I know," she replied sweetly, grinning madly. She then glanced toward the portrait hole and sobered immediately. "Now, shh! Jane's coming, and I don't want her knowing about anything yet, or they'll be rumors that we're planning our wedding by dinner."

Looking over, Isabella saw Jane trudging over towards them. She noticed how disheveled and bothered Jane looked before remembering that the latter had not returned to the dormitory all night.

"Hi, girls," Jane said, a bit tentatively Isabella noticed. She and Keira greeted her in turn. "Lily around?' she then asked, taking a seat on the sofa next to Isabella.

"No," Keira replied. "But she asked about you last night. Surprised that we didn't see you in the morning, though. You usually come back to freshen up at the very least. No offense, but you look a bit haggard."

It took a great deal of effort for Isabella not to laugh, but she was slightly stunned when Jane did not retort, as per usual.

"No, no, I lost track of the time this morning," she said absently. "And I know I look awful. I feel awful."

"Maybe you should try getting more sleep, then," Keira said in mock admonishment. "And when are you just gonna tell us who this bloke keeping you away at all hours of the night is? You usually aren't so mum about your flings."

Jane's face filled with color. "You mean you don't know?"

"No, how could we? I think your ability to stay hidden rivals that of Potter and them," Keira said slowly, watching Jane carefully. "But by the way you're blushing, I don't think you want us to know." She then grinned at Isabella. "Must be a duffer, don't you think?"

"I'm going to take 'duffer' to mean a 'loser?'"

"Valid assumption," Keira said, smiling and nodding. "Let's see; is it Wilkins or that Hufflepuff, what's his name? Macmillan? Oh…oh, don't tell me it's a Slytherin!"

"No! For heaven's sake," Jane muttered. "And this isn't just a fling; I actually care about him."

"All the more reason to share your happiness with your friends," Isabella said, though knowing Jane did not consider her a close friend; the feeling was mutual.

Jane eyed Isabella guardedly. "No, that makes it all the more complicated," she said, more to herself. She then stood and said, "I'm going to head upstairs, rest up a bit, and think things through."

"Well, that was odd," Keira said after Jane had disappeared up the staircase. "I've never seen her so reserved since…first year, I'd have to say."

Isabella shrugged and returned to her essay. She still didn't know Jane too well, but could tell she was a little off. Admittedly though, Isabella wasn't too concerned.

"When did our lives turn into a bloody romance novel?" Keira asked rhetorically after ten minutes of silence between them. She had been studying a star chart, but it obviously had not been keeping her interest.

Isabella raised an eyebrow in question.

"_Remus_ and _I_ dating—"

"They say opposites attract, you know," Isabella interrupted, trying to sound encouraging.

"Yes, well..." She trailed off, trying not to smile. "And Lily and Elias going through the most awkward stage in a new relationship; Jane sneaking around more than usual and not showing off her beau for all to see. All we need now is for you to have some drama, and we could make it a weekly wireless show."

"I'm sure we'd have millions of fans," Isabella said sarcastically, laughing a little. "Besides, I am happy being drama-free."

"Oh, but you're not, really," Keira said, looking expectantly at her. "Tell me what's going on with Sirius."

"Nothing!" Isabella said, knowing Keira would see right through her.

"Come on, Isabella," Keira said imploringly. "You told us that he kissed you on New Years, and this tense _something_ going between you is really rather obvious."

"Yeah, all this _silent_ something," she said petulantly.

"So you want something to be going on, then?"

"Oh, you know I do!" Isabella said, a little exasperated. "It's been obvious, hasn't it? You know that I've liked him for a while now."

Keira nodded, looking pleased. "Yes, but it's nice to actually hear you say it." Isabella rolled her eyes. "So maybe he's now waiting for you to return the favor. You know tomorrow is his birthday, right?"

"No," Isabella said, somewhat distractedly.

"Ah, right, how could you have?" Keira said. "Well, anyways, the boys are planning—ah, why don't I let them tell you themselves?"

Isabella looked up to see James and Remus approaching them. She sincerely hoped that neither had heard them talking about Sirius.

"Afternoon, fair maidens," James said politely with a little bow.

"Hello, James, Remus," Isabella greeted. Remus nodded.

"Hi, boys," Keira said, and Isabella was amused at how shy she seemed all of a sudden. She and Remus shared a smile before she looked back to James.

"Sorry to bother you during what looks like very important work, but as you may or may not know, tomorrow is Sirius' birthday, and we're having a little do up in our room," James said. "Will we see you there?"

"If only you promise that the birthday boy won't be sitting in a corner and brooding to himself," Isabella blurt out before she could stop herself. She bit her lip before meeting James' gaze. "Sorry."

"No, not at all," James said, grinning. "It's a legitimate request considering…we'll make sure Sirius is in good spirits tomorrow." Something about his smile was a little too knowing and suggestive. Isabella felt heat rise in her cheeks.

"And since you two are among our favorites," Remus said, either not catching this awkward moment or not caring, "we ask that you only bring yourself. All refreshments will be provided."

"So," James said, clapping his hands, "I think that's all the details. Come up around 9:00, and bring your roommates if they're interested." Isabella heard the hesitancy in his last words and wondered if he would prefer for Lily not to attend.

"Moony, shall we?"

"Yeah, just a sec," Remus said before leaning down and whispering something quickly in Keira's ear. She smiled and nodded. "Great," he said quietly as he stood up straight again. "See you later, Isabella."

"Bye, guys."

Isabella waited until they were engaged with a group of seventh years a few tables away before rounding on Keira.

"So?"

"Looks like I'll be going on that stroll after all," Keira said. "But enough about me. We need to discuss how you're going to corner Sirius."

"I'm not cornering _anyone_," Isabella said, shaking her head.

"Okay, okay. Just have a few drinks before chatting him up, then," Keira said grudgingly.

"Maybe," Isabella said, thinking about how horribly that could turn out. She could end up drinking too much, throwing herself at him, and coming out a fool. It was his birthday, so of course there would be a number of girls hoping to give him a friendly birthday kiss and some suggestive attention. She sighed at the upsetting thought.

"I know what you're thinking," Keira said, and Isabella thought, again, that Keira was too perceptive for her own good. "He won't pay them any mind."

Keira then stuffed her star charts and Astronomy book in her bag before reaching for Isabella's essay. "Come on, put it away; we're going upstairs."

"For what?" Isabella said, frowning as Keira hastily rolled her essay and stuffed it into her own bag.

"To tell Jane and to figure out what we're going to wear," Keira said as if explaining two and two equaled four. When Isabella only continued to frown, she added, "I know this isn't due until Tuesday, so forget it. It's almost the weekend; let's fully embrace it."

A small smile finally appeared at Isabella's lips. "Alright, but I don't want to look as if I put in too much planning."

"You won't," Keira said as she grabbed an arm and pulled Isabella up from the sofa. "That's the whole point."

* * *

Sirius eyed Remus cautiously before taking a swig of his mead and throwing ten more Galleons into the pot.

"Alright, call," Sirius said. "Queen-high flush," he added as he displayed his cards, the Queen of Hearts winking at him.

"Damn, jacks full of nines," James muttered, throwing his cards down in disgust.

Peter placed his three kings and two sevens down, looking resentful. "Better than me."

Sirius glanced at Remus expectantly, ready to claim the pot as his own. He usually didn't do so well during their poker games, but he thought maybe today he was having a little birthday luck.

Remus stared back at Sirius, his face impassive before it eventually broke into a smug smile.

"Sorry to disappoint you, Padfoot," he said and laid his cards down. "Straight flush, king high. I believe the pot is mine."

Sirius gaped at Remus' cards. "Cheater!" he shouted as he ducked under the table to see where Remus was hiding his extra cards, though knowing he wouldn't find any.

"Get a grip," Remus muttered, still grinning. "It's not my fault you're all absolutely rubbish at counting cards, which by the way, is not cheating."

"That may be true," Sirius said grumpily as he resumed his seat, "but it's my birthday. You're supposed to let me win."

"I was trying to!" Remus laughed. "You couldn't catch on obviously."

"Yeah, well, you've cleaned me out," James said as he stood and stretched. "We should get to clearing this anyways and setting up for the party."

"Which is my cue to rest up a bit," he said, smirking when the others scowled. He stood from the table and went to his bed. He shut his curtains halfway, reclined with his hands folded behind his head, and closed his eyes.

It had been a good, but so far mostly uneventful, day. He had slept in a bit, was late to Charms—though Flitwick didn't notice or care—and had received a respectable amount of cards and well-wishes from a number of very eager girls.

Immediately after dinner, they rushed over to the Three Broomsticks, where Rosmerta gave them endless boxes of drinks and food. Sirius had been hoping for a birthday kiss, but she shook her head, smiled playfully, and asked, "What kind of woman would that make me? Preying on such a young boy?" Sirius had responded that he was "all man now," but Rosmerta waved them off with wishes of having fun tonight.

Sirius chuckled at the thought of his "all man" comment, when in reality, he had felt no different upon waking up this morning. He had already been forced to come of age much earlier due to his home life; he considered the day he left his home and family forever to be the day he had fully become a man. Today just meant that it was now official.

Regardless, he was still grateful for all the attention and gifts he had received today, and he had thoroughly enjoyed spending the past hour playing cards with his friends, happy that they were able to put their hostility aside for the night. Sirius knew their friendship was going through a rough patch right now, but that was to be expected after living with each other for so long. Despite the ill feelings among them, James, Remus, and Peter were remarkable mates, and he knew that he was lucky to have them.

"Get your arse out here, Padfoot!"

Sirius startled at James' voice. He wasn't sure how long he had dozed off for.

He sat up and opened his curtains, pleased to find that they had enlarged the room so that there was a considerable cleared space near the far window. The beds were now up against the wall closest to the bathroom to make the space even bigger. Sirius couldn't remember feeling his bed move.

Two long tables stood on either side of a smaller one, which on top a wireless stood. One table was laden with the food Rosmerta had given them and some treats nicked from the kitchens. On the other were bottles of nearly every hard and soft drink imaginable and a small jar. Peter would be playing bartender tonight—something he was very good at that earned him a few tips whenever they had a party.

There were also smaller tables throughout the space with chairs and setups of some of their favorite drinking games, including Merlin's Cup and Knut Flip. They had even left the poker table out, which made Sirius a little nervous. The personalized, one-of-a-kind oak table had been his first, most expensive, and most impulsive purchase with his new inheritance from Uncle Alphard. He had a soft spot for it, and didn't want to see it become victim to people's drunken stumblings and spilled drinks.

But he grinned anyways as he joined his friends near the drinks table. "Very nice guys, much appreciated."

"Only the best for our little Padfoot," James said, offering him a glass of dark liquid. "A toast." He then cleared his throat. "I don't want to get too sentimental here, but, Sirius, you're my best friend, and I know that whatever shit happens, you'll always be behind me—and all of us—to offer support—"

"Or kick us when we're already down," Remus added.

"Or flick dungbombs at our heads," Peter said jovially.

"Or pick up my leavings," James added before coughing, "Marisol Blount," into his hand. "But in the end, you're always there. Happy birthday, mate!"

"Happy birthday!" Remus and Peter said together, raising their glasses.

"Well said," Sirius laughed, shaking his head.

He finished his drink in two gulps. After drinking his cognac for so long, the firewhiskey burned going down his throat a little more than he had anticipated, and it reminded him of the promise he had made to himself earlier in the day—that he was going to take it slow tonight and not get shitfaced.

His past two birthdays had been a blur. His friends had gotten him so sloshed both times that he had been sick for two days straight. He actually wanted to remember and enjoy the party, so he planned on spacing out his drinks tonight to ensure a constant pleasant buzz, and nothing more.

But he still had to get there. He filled his glass with another measure of firewhiskey before sitting at a table.

"So you want to tell us what bird was lucky enough to receive your attention today?" James said, grabbing a couple of chips from a platter.

Sirius was honestly confused. He hadn't been with a girl in months, and definitely not today.

"What are you talking about?"

James rolled his eyes. "You weren't at lunch today."

"Doesn't mean I was in a broom closet getting a feel up," he said.

"Of course that's what it means," Peter said, eyeing him suspiciously. "It's your birthday."

Sirius bristled. What he really that predictable? True he had been occupied at lunch, but there had been no girls around.

Sirius had, in fact, been in this very room at lunch, sitting at his desk, and writing a letter to James' parents with the most sincere and thankful words he could summon.

He knew that Clarice and Edward considered him sort of a second son, but he had not expected to receive the elaborate gold watch from them this morning, sitting among his other presents and dwarfing them all.

After leaving home last year, he did not think he would get to participate in this long-standing wizard tradition, but the Potters had made sure that he would. He looked down at the watch now fastened snugly on his left wrist; it was much too nice and much more than he deserved. It and the short, but heartfelt, note that accompanied it in the box had triggered an overwhelming sense of affection and appreciation for the Potters that was much too fresh to share with his friends right now.

"Well, I wasn't," Sirius said in a tone of finality. Peter raised his eyebrows but didn't say anything more.

"You're going to have to buck up if you want to last the night," Sirius then said to James, who had been caught yawning and rubbing his eyes under his glasses.

"Ugh," he groaned. "It's just the past week catching up with me. Between class, Quidditch practice, and Delilah, I haven't had a decent night's sleep."

"She coming tonight?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, bringing Marlene, Dorcas, and Thalia with her," James said before turning back to Sirius. "You happen to grab any of that energy tonic from Rosmerta?"

"There should be a couple of vials in there," Sirius said, gesturing towards his schoolbag sitting at the foot of his bed. He then grabbed a deck of cards and began shuffling them absently.

"Ah," James said, and Sirius could hear amusement in his voice. "You claim you weren't with a girl today, so explain _this_."

They all looked over to James, who was still at Sirius' bed. He was holding up a very wrinkled gold and scarlet tie, a tipsy smirk plastered on his face.

"It's a tie," Sirius said, not seeing James' point.

"A _girl's_ tie," James further clarified. "And a Gryffindor's to boot." He then stoked his chin as he walked back over to them, still holding the tie out in front of him. "So we know it isn't Evan's or Keira's, and, good god, I hope it isn't Jane's. Or maybe you've stopped pussy-footing around and finally made a move on Isabella."

"Who says she has to be in our year?" Remus said, mirth evident in his voice as well. "Maybe he's gone back to Daphne." He and the others roared with laughter.

Sirius scowled; he had been just as surprised at the sight of the tie as they were. But the mention of Isabella had triggered something in his mind. He remembered that the tie _did_ belong to Isabella, but she had given it to him in a most un-amorous situation.

It had happened during their secret trip to Hogsmeade months ago. They had both removed their ties to keep from looking so obviously like students. But had it really been in there all this time? He had completely forgotten about it. He smiled at the memory, though. It was the day his attraction towards Isabella had begun to manifest.

"It _is_ Daphne's?" James asked, having incorrectly interpreted Sirius' smile and looking appalled.

"Wha—no!" Sirius said, shaking his head. "If you must know, it's Isabella's." They all gaped at him. "But I didn't receive it in the way you're all thinking."

He then explained how he had taken her to Hogsmeade after she learned that her father had been cursed into unconsciousness. He had never told them the story.

"So that's where you were that day," James said, looking a bit put out, but then his face lit up immediately. "Maybe you could pull her aside for a private _word_ tonight and give it back."

"Or tomorrow morning," Peter said with a suggestive waggle of his brows.

Sirius rolled his eyes, but he couldn't help grinning at the thought of spending his birthday night with Isabella.

An hour later, the boys' room was full of chatter and music blasting from the wireless. James, Remus, and Peter had invited most of the sixth and seventh year students from every house except for Slytherin, of course, and Sirius was happy to see everyone was having a good time.

There was a group of Ravenclaw seventh year girls and guys playing a raucous game of Merlin's Cup at one table, two Hufflepuff sixth year girls were flirting with Peter as he made them drinks, and he himself was involved in a very heated poker game with Oscar Thunk and Miles Grant, two seventh year Gryffindors, and Armando Plies and Jackson Sinistra, a sixth year Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, respectively.

Sirius was still not having much birthday luck, but he had picked up on Oscar's tell whenever the latter had a good hand. He was hoping to take advantage of it during the current round when he was distracted by more guests arriving.

It was Delilah, closely followed by Dorcas Meadows, Marlene McKinnon, and Thalia Crake, who had instantly caught his attention. How could she have not, wearing a miniskirt and skin-tight shirt that showed nearly every bit of her smooth olive skin. God, she was gorgeous.

She was also the only girl Sirius had been obsessively attracted to that he hadn't pursued. A little less than a year ago, he and Thalia had shared their first and only snog. She and Marlene had snuck into the Gryffindor common room during a particularly wild Quidditch after party so that she could corner him. It hadn't taken much for Sirius to give into her flirting and drag her into a dark corner, where they became a mass of entangled limbs, both struggling for control.

Sirius quickly learned then that he didn't like girls who had bollocks as large as his own. Not that he thought he always had to be in control, but Thalia's confidence was a little too overbearing for him. She knew that boys shut themselves away behind their bed hangings at night and wanked themselves dumb to thoughts of her, and she loved to flirt. And after reluctantly acknowledging that he was the jealous type, Sirius knew that if they had dated, her banter with every boy who looked her way would continue, and he would have gone mad within just a few days.

But that didn't mean he couldn't look, and he stared brazenly at her as the girls approached the poker table.

"Happy birthday!" Delilah, Dorcas, and Marlene sang in unison. Sirius thanked them and jokingly ordered them to the drinks table, informing them that their tardiness had caused them to fall behind everyone else. They giggled as they walked by while squeezing his shoulder or playfully punching him on the arm.

Thalia, however, had sidled up to him, placed an arm across his shoulders, and kissed him quickly on the cheek. "Happy birthday," she breathed in his ear before standing up and ruffling his hair. "Find me later for a birthday shot, okay?"

"Sure," Sirius said with an easy smile, though knowing that he probably wouldn't.

She grinned before joining her friends who were chatting with Peter. James had just approached Delilah, offered her drink, and was whispering in her ear.

Sirius turned back to the table, caught off guard by the boys' gawking stares.

"How do you do it?" Jackson asked unashamedly, shaking his head. "I would easily give up Quidditch for a year for a go with her."

"And here you are, turning her away like she's Dorna Upton," Armando added, chuckling as he drank his mead.

Sirius laughed a little uncomfortably; apparently he wasn't buzzed enough yet. "Thalia's great; she's just not my type."

Oscar eyed him skeptically. "Then who is?"

The answer to that question had just walked through the dormitory door behind Keira. Sirius unconsciously grinned as he watched Isabella accept a drink from Remus, who had approached them within seconds. He was honestly surprised she had even come.

Isabella was annoyed with him; this he knew. He had kissed her without explanation on New Years, and he had been a complete arsehole to her since. He felt incredibly stupid for the way he was acting—especially after chiding Remus for more or less the same behavior—but he just didn't know what to do. Considering all that had passed between them thus far, simply asking Isabella out didn't seem to be enough in his mind. Sirius wanted to plan something a bit more unique; they had already been to Hogsmeade together, so what now?

Sirius thought the fact he had even acknowledged his growing affection for Isabella was a big step. After James' pep talk on New Year's Eve, he realized he had been a stubborn ponce. Last year had been a rough one for him, and the last thing he had wanted or needed was a girlfriend to complicate things. It was one of the main reasons he had chucked Daphne.

But Isabella had—literally—come out of nowhere. And while he would admit that his initial attraction to her had been because she was just different from the girls he been around for however many years, she had kept catching his attention much to his annoyance. But he had refused to make a move to prove a point—exactly what that point was and who he was trying to prove it to escaped him right now, though he was sure it had something to do with his ego.

Keira must have asked Remus where he was because Remus was now pointing at him. The girls waved, but Isabella's smile was not as bright as Keira's. Sirius raised his drink and inclined his head toward them before gong back to his game.

For the next hour, Sirius kept a surreptitious eye on Isabella. While he finished his game, she continued chatting with Remus and Keira. When he joined Andy and few others for a quick game of Merlin's Cup, she played Knut Flip with Dorcas, Marlene, Oscar and Peter, who was taking a beak.

And when he was finally cornered by Thalia with two shots of who-knows-what in hand, he watched as Adam approached a startled Isabella with a drink before grasping her elbow and leading her to a quieter area; Sirius' face went hard. Isabella nodded and smiled while they talked, but Sirius thought she looked rather uncomfortable. The insistent looks she kept throwing Keira's way were finally answered when the latter approached the group and pulled Isabella away with talk of 'girl stuff' and a half-hearted apology to Adam. They wandered toward the food table, and Sirius excused himself from Thalia to get closer to them under the guise of joining Peter at the bar.

"I just can't believe how adamant he still is after last term," Keira said quietly, unable to keep the amusement out of her voice.

Isabella grimaced as she munched on a cauldron cake. "I don't either. I was trying to avoid it, but I think it's high time that I become a bitch and tell him to back off."

"You should do it here, in front of everyone," Keira said, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "He'll definitely get the point, and it would serve him right for being such a smarmy git."

"I don't know if I can be that big of a bitch yet," Isabella said, frowning a little. "Though, maybe if you get a couple more drinks in me…" They both laughed. Isabella then finished her current drink. "I'll be back."

"Where you going?"

"Back to our dormitory to use the ladies' room," she answered. "I don't know if I trust how clean the boys keep theirs."

"Good point," Keira laughed.

"And don't wait for me," Isabella said seriously before smiling. "Go flirt with Remus."

"With pleasure."

Isabella winked at her before heading out the door.

Sirius thought for a second. This was his chance to make a move. He wasn't sure what exactly he planned to do, but if he wanted to get Isabella alone for at least a couple of words, now was the time.

"And at least I've made a few tips," Peter was saying, shaking the jar a little, "so it hasn't been all bad."

"Yeah, great Wormtail," Sirius said absently. He was checking his reflection in the window, happy to see his promise had served him well, for he didn't look as disheveled as the others in the room.

"I'll be back," Sirius said quickly when Peter gave him a dubious look. "If anyone asks, tell them I'm out getting some fresh air."

Peter nodded as a knowing grin grew at his lips. "Oh, yeah sure."

Sirius scowled at the assumption but thought better against arguing the point right now. With a glance around the room, Sirius left. The raucous music and games ensured he wasn't seen.

Once in the empty corridor, Sirius was surprised at how quiet it was. He rushed down the stairs to the common room, which still had a considerable amount of students. He had no idea what time it was.

He walked over to the open door leading to the girls' staircase and waited, hoping that Isabella still had the intention on returning to the party. If she didn't, he would have more than understood. He had half a mind to go back and chuck Adam out.

"Hey, Siri," a voice said behind him, and he instantly shuddered at the simper. He turned and saw Daphne and Katie Darringer standing there, looking somewhat hopeful.

"Er, hi."

"Happy birthday," she said with an eager smile that he did not return. He wished she would just get to what she wanted.

"Thanks."

Daphne bit her lip. "We were hoping we would get invites to your party."

"Oh," Sirius said. "James, Remus, and Peter were in charge of that. Think they just wanted to keep it to sixth years and above." A thought then came to him and he added, "But go ahead, if you're still interested. It's still going strong."

They both grinned. "Thanks, Siri. You coming?" Daphne asked with a suggestive smile.

"Yeah, in a minute," he said, glad they had taken the bait. "Something to take care of first."

Daphne's smile sagged a little. "Okay, then I'll see you up there…" She trailed off as her eyes shifted up to the staircase and narrowed a bit.

Sirius turned back to Isabella descending the staircase, looking nonplussed between the three of them before returning Daphne's glare.

"Hey," Sirius said, instantly forgetting about the girls behind him.

Isabella looked at him skeptically as she reached the bottom. "Hi." She considered him before asking, "Why aren't you at your party?"

"Came looking for you," he said, realizing how creepy it made him appear.

"Because?"

Sirius cleared his throat, trying to remain cool. Having her this close was distracting. Her dark hair—which she hardly ever wore down—fell in loose waves past her shoulders, and her dark jeans and snug jumper gave him an even better idea of her figure.

"To ask if you wanted to take a walk."

She studied him and a moment, and Sirius was sure she was trying to keep from smiling.

"Alright," she said finally. "I guess it _is_ your birthday."

"Great," he said, and resisting the urge to grab her hand, he led her out the portrait hole.

Though he had no idea of where to head when he asked, Sirius knew exactly where to go once they were in the corridor. They walked silently for a few minutes, Sirius a half a step ahead of her, and he was glad that he was drunk enough not to feel awkward. But Isabella must not have been.

"So let me see it," she said as she fell into step with him.

Sirius' brow furrowed in question.

"Your watch," she said, rolling her eyes. "Or is that not a tradition here as well?"

"Oh, yeah, it is," he said, catching on. He held up his left wrist, and she grabbed it and pulled it closer to her.

"It's beautiful," she said as her fingers ran around the large face. Sirius admired how soft her fingers felt. "Can I assume it's from James' parents?"

"It is," he said. "I was a little caught off guard when I saw it, but it was a pleasant surprise."

She looked at him while she released his wrist, an understanding smile at her lips. "That's very sweet and considerate of them."

Sirius nodded, finding his throat a little too dry to speak at the moment. He hadn't told her about his family, but he knew she had heard the general story from others, and she had been the first person, other than James, to see him the day he ran away.

"So it's a tradition for wizards to receive a gold watch in the States too?" Sirius asked when he felt assured to speak again.

"Yeah, and witches receive a charm bracelet that's usually been passed down through the mother's side of the family," she explained. "I already have my mother's, though I keep it at home."

"I always thought it was odd that there isn't an established tradition for witches here," Sirius said, noticing that her voice had gone soft. "But I guess that's just to reiterate the point that we wizards are superior."

"Prat," she muttered with a sharp elbow to his ribs.

"Ah, I see you've been picking up the language since giving you that bit of advice," he said, relieved to see her smiling again. "Well used."

Isabella didn't respond as they reached the staircase leading to the Astronomy Tower. She looked at him, her eyebrows raised in question.

"Fresh air," he said, gesturing that she should go first. She only shrugged and began to climb.

They ascended the staircase in silence, but Sirius felt relaxed since most of his initial anxiety had abated. And he could tell that Isabella's irritation with him had diminished a bit as well. Still in question, however, was his plan for when they reached the top.

Isabella opened the door and braced herself before walking into the night air. It was just as cold as the last time they were up here alone nearly two months ago, except tonight was windy. She sat on a stool between two telescopes to shield herself from the rushing air. Sirius followed her and stood with his back against the parapet a few of telescopes away from her.

"So were you enjoying the party?" he asked, wondering if she would be honest.

"I was, except for when I was accosted—is there a particular reason why you invited Adam?" she said, now glaring at him.

Sirius laughed and held his arms up in defense. "I didn't do the inviting. And do you really think I wouldn't invite someone just because _you_ have trouble telling him to leave you alone?"

She dropped her eyes, and Sirius knew that if there had been better light than the half moon currently shielded behind thinning storm clouds, he would have seen a faint pink on her cheeks.

"Well, maybe because I don't want him to leave me alone," she said defiantly, now looking right at him. Sirius tried hard from scoffing derisively; now she was just trying to prove a point.

"Then don't complain," Sirius said with a smirk.

"Were _you_ enjoying the party?" she threw back at him.

"Of course," he said genially. "A party where I'm the center of attention. How could I not enjoy?"

"I just thought you'd be the type to make a drunken ass of yourself," she glibly explained.

"You mean 'arse,' love; I'm not a donkey," he said superiorly before adding, "and that's how I spent my last two birthdays. While fun at the time, the next couple of days weren't. Thought I would take it easy tonight so I could actually remember. It is a special one, after all."

"That it is," she said quietly. "Did you get everything you wanted?"

"Almost," he said, quickly looking away from her.

"'Almost?' Pray tell, what has _Sirius Black_ been denied on his special day?" she said with mock alarm.

He couldn't help laughing a little. "Uh, if you must know, I never received a birthday kiss."

"Is that all?"

"Is—is that all?" he repeated with his own teasing disbelief. "I'd have to say that's the most important gift of all."

"But I'd think that would be the easiest one for you to get," Isabella said with a disappointing shake of her head. "Or are you losing your charm?"

"Hardly," he said shortly.

"There are dozens of girls down there who would love nothing more than to fulfill that need," she said, and Sirius noticed she was now avoiding his eyes too.

"What's a 'dozens?'"

Isabella chuckled a bit. "Just know that it means a lot."

"Noted."

She then looked plainly at him. "So why don't you head back down to your party and get your kiss? I'm sure Thalia would be happy to oblige."

"Because I'm here," he said clearly, meeting her gaze.

That seemed to throw her a little, and she looked away again for a short moment before standing up. Sirius swallowed hard as she moved between the telescopes towards him, the wind whipping her hair and a determined look on her face. When she finally reached him, she placed her hands lightly on his chest and looked up at him. He felt his skin heat up at once.

"And since _I'm_ here…" she said, a smile at her lips.

But Isabella didn't finish her sentence; she leaned up and kissed him instead.

Her lips moved slowly but insistently over his own, but before he could react properly, she pulled away.

They stared at each other for a beat before their lips met again. Sirius didn't know who leaned in first, but did it matter?

He lifted his hands to her waist as she moved her hands from his chest to clasp around his neck. Not wanting to hesitate like he did on New Years, Sirius swept his tongue across her lips, and she eagerly accepted it. Their tongues moved feverishly against each other's, and he was pleased to taste his favorite cognac on hers.

Unable to resist, he pulled her flush to his body and reveled in the sensation he had missed for so long. Isabella moaned as she fisted a hand in his hair, and Sirius thought he might burst from the overwhelming need to have her. He was glad he had not given into Thalia and had waited for Isabella instead. But he felt foolish for having waited so long to acknowledge the obvious mutual attraction between them.

With a gasp, Isabella broke the kiss. They were both panting. He stared at her lips—wet and plump—before meeting her eyes. She was looking at him expectantly.

Sirius hesitated. He wanted to continue kissing, not talk about it. And even if they did talk, what exactly was he supposed to say? Yes, he found Isabella attractive and they had just shared a great snog, but…so what? Did that mean they had to be boyfriend and girlfriend now?

He knew his obstinate side was beginning to take reign as Isabella's eyes went from expectant to insistent. That annoyed him. He _had_ chucked Daphne for a reason, but that didn't mean he had to let Isabella, or anyone else who thought herself worthy, to take her place. Why should he be expected to do anything?

He smirked down at her, but he knew it was far from charming. "Wonderful birthday gift, love. I was hoping you'd be the one to give it to me. Shall we try again?"

Isabella's eyes widened as she removed her hands from around his neck and stepped away. Sirius could tell she was fuming from her flaring nostrils and set jaw. But it didn't show in her voice.

"Happy birthday," she said, her tone flat, though Sirius could hear a hint of humiliation beneath it. She then quickly turned away and walked towards the door leading to the castle below.

The moment she disappeared down the staircase, Sirius knew he had made an egregious mistake. God, why did he have to be so stubborn? Why couldn't he just let her in?

After a kicking over a few stools, Sirius went back into the castle and to Gryffindor Tower. He slowly opened the door to his dormitory and saw that the level of debauchery had ascended in the short time he was gone. Of course, Isabella was nowhere to be seen, but neither were Remus and Keira or James and Delilah. Sirius looked around and noticed that Peter and one of those Hufflepuff girls he was flirting with earlier were gone as well.

_How ironic_, he thought with a glower. _It's my birthday, and I'm the one alone_.

As much as he wished he could kick everyone out and go to sleep, he knew he wouldn't be able to rest at all. He wished that he could find Isabella and apologize, but that wouldn't be possible right now. Sirius was going to make it up to her because he realized—though too late—that he really did want her and that he had to stop fighting it. But for now, why not enjoy his party properly?

"Hey, Oscar," Sirius said as he approached the boy at the bar. "How about another poker game?"

"Sure," he answered as Sirius sat down at his poker table. "Going to try to win your money back?"

"Don't really care about that," Sirius said, shuffling the cards and grinning as Armando and Andy joined the table too. "I just need a distraction. And bring over that bottle."

"Aye, birthday boy."

Sirius all but snatched the bottle from Oscar's hand before quaffing as much of the firewhiskey as his throat and stomach could take in one go, hoping it would blur the memory of his birthday kiss, if only for the night.

* * *

**A/N: Infuriating, I know, but you really didn't think Sirius would let someone in so easily, right? He's too stubborn and proud for his own good sometimes, but don't worry, he'll rectify things soon.**

**I think this is the fastest update I've ever done, though admittedly, the chapter is shorter than most. But I am on a writing kick since being done with that blasted test (did well, by the way), so hopefully I won't be going more than a few weeks between updates. In fact, the next couple of chapters are pretty much done. Just need some editing and structure fixes to ensure that they're in line with my main outline. Thanks for your continued interest!**


	15. All Falls Down

As Lily became aware of herself lying in the warm sheets of her bed, she attempted to open her eyes…but she couldn't. She rubbed furiously at the gunk that had glued them shut, hoping that it was a consequence of the dry winter air, which was a common occurrence. But then she felt the tightness in her chest, the dry scratch in her throat, and the congestion in her nose and forehead.

She was sick.

Lily shouldn't have been too shocked. After all, there was a moderate cold running through the school that had affected at least twenty other students and three professors, and she had been running herself ragged for the past week and a half. Between classes and homework, time with Elias, extra Potions lessons, Prefect patrols, and the new Prefect duties recently assigned to coincide with newly enacted security measures, Lily had not properly taken care of herself. It had now caught up with her, and with less than a week to her seventeenth birthday no less.

But while a simple Pepper-up Potion had relieved other students' symptoms and had them feeling back to normal within a few hours, she knew that wouldn't be the case for her. Lily didn't catch colds often—she could only count two other times she had been sick in her almost six years at Hogwarts—but when she did, they hit her hard, and Madam Pomfrey's potion did not benefit her as well as it did other students, for reasons unknown. Even after ingesting more potion than what Madam Pomfrey deemed safe, Lily was always bedridden for at least two days before she felt well enough to restart her daily routine.

She groaned at the prospect. During her earlier years, that was fine, but now there just wasn't enough time to be out of action for two days. She had too many responsibilities—both academic and personal—to lie in bed for so long, especially when it was only Tuesday.

With much effort she rolled over and pulled back her curtains. Her roommates were gone, and her clock read 8:10; she should have been up over an hour ago, but she couldn't recall the alarm going off. She sat up slowly, swung her legs to the side of the bed, and stood up cautiously to avoid aggravating the pounding in her head.

Upon entering the bathroom, Lily wished she had grabbed her dressing gown from her wardrobe. She was freezing, the cold tile hitting her feet shot painful jolts through her body, and her joints ached from every little movement. Merlin, the next couple of days were going to be awful.

Twenty minutes later, she precariously descended the marble staircase into the Entrance Hall wrapped in two scarves and her heavy cloak. Though Lily knew it wouldn't be of much help, she intended to go to Madam Pomfrey for _something_, but knew the healer would insist that Lily eat something first—even just a bite—before brewing and administering anything, as she always did. She ran into Keira and Isabella exiting the Great Hall.

"Oh, Lily, I had a feeling you were sick," Keira said sadly upon seeing Lily dressed as if she were heading out on a expedition to Siberia. "I tried waking you, but you were like a rock."

"We were just bringing you some porridge and to ask if you needed anything," Isabella said, holding up a bowl covered with a napkin.

"Thanks, girls," Lily said, surprised at how scratchy her voice sounded. She took the porridge with an appreciative smile, wishing that she had remained in bed wallowing in her own misery for just a little longer. "But since I am up now…" she added with a shrug.

Keira eyed her doubtfully. "Alright, just don't stay up too long; you should be resting. Have a few bites, get some tonic from Pomfrey, and go straight to bed. We'll check up on you at lunch. We left our bags upstairs, so we'll see you later."

"Yes, mum," Lily said, trying not to roll her eyes. Keira had always assumed a motherly air whenever someone was sick, an effect of her mum's past career as a Mediwitch.

Lily entered the Great Hall, which was not as full considering that class was starting soon. She sat down at a quiet corner of the Gryffindor table and gulped down two goblets full of pumpkin juice before half-heartedly nibbling on some toast and eating a couple of spoonfuls of porridge. A few discarded copies of the _Prophet_ lay about, and she grabbed one to check if there was any important news.

A cursory scan of the front page told her nothing pertaining to Voldemort or his Death Eaters. She turned it over to the back page, which also had nothing, and was about to toss it aside when the name 'Wenlock' caught her eye. She flung her toast aside and smoothed out the newspaper in front of her to read the short article that contained the name, an ominous feeling beginning to weigh on her.

_**Alberta Wenlock and Two Granddaughters Found Dead in Swansea**_

_The body of Alberta Wenlock, former Chief Healer of St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries, was discovered by Aurors yesterday evening in a dilapidated shack just outside of Swansea. With no traces of harm or injury, the Killing Curse is suspected as the cause of death. Aurors were alerted to search the area after local Muggle police stations were inundated with reports of 'green fireworks,' which turned out to be remnants of the Dark Mark cast over the dwelling._

_Wenlock's two granddaughters, Harrietta, 16, and Elizabeth, 13, were also found dead. No wands were found on the scene; however, there is speculation that their wands were confiscated by their killers._

_After the mysterious murders of Wenlock's son, daughter-in-law, and grandson in December 1975, now attributed to Death Eaters, she fled the country with her surviving granddaughters, who were Hogwarts students at the time. When and why they returned to England remains unknown, but according to Muggle witnesses, the three women had moved into the area only a week prior to their deaths._

_Aurors on the scene would not divulge anymore information, but the Ministry is using this tragedy to remind the Wizarding community to remain vigilant of their surroundings and to contact their local Magical Law Enforcement office to report any information regarding suspicions of Dark activity in their area._

The tears began to fall, but Lily made no move to wipe them away. Harrietta was dead.

Lily mourned for the girl who, along with Severus, had been her closest friend upon starting at Hogwarts. Keira, Jane, and Mary had known each other before school, so Lily and Harrietta, feeling like outsiders, had clung to each other for support during their first year. Although Harrietta's father was a wizard, her mother was a Muggle, and her family had lived primarily as such.

Lily remembered much too vividly the night during fifth year before Christmas holiday when Harrietta woke her and relayed that her family had been killed and that she and Elizabeth were leaving with their grandmother. Thinking it to have been a morbid dream upon waking, Lily cried for her friend on most of the train ride home the next day after accepting that it had been true.

But even as the grief overwhelmed Lily, the beginnings of guilt also became perceptible.

Harrietta and Lily had corresponded over the next few weeks, the former's letters usually short and scribbled, but Lily had found comfort in knowing that her friend was safe.

However, the letters became more and more sporadic as winter turned to spring, and by the time summer approached and Lily's friendship with Severus began to fully collapse, Harrietta had been driven far from her mind. Lily could remember thinking about Harrietta only once since last summer—on the Hogwarts Express as they headed for school when she learned that Isabella would be their new roommate, but Harrietta's memory had not been enough to compel her to inquire about her friend once they arrived at school.

Since then, Lily had been dragged into every clichéd type of teenage drama—uncertainty with new boyfriend, strife with ex-boyfriend, a backstabbing friend, a catty sister, and everything in between. It was all so inconsequential compared to what the rest of the world was facing outside this castle and all of which Lily had vowed to herself to never get caught up in it. She had become one of those girls who voluntarily enveloped themselves within the trivial social ills of Hogwarts. The fact that she was sitting here feeling as if her body were about freeze into a block of ice, fall apart at its hinges, and melt from fever all at the same time was proof she had erroneously arranged her priorities since returning to school.

The skipped meals to spend private time with Elias, the lack of sleep from a combination of late nights spent hastily completing put-off homework and early mornings spent half-heartedly brewing potions to avoid lessons with Severus, the binging on sweets, crisps, butterbeer, and wine while gossiping with friends or snogging Elias—it was all punishing her now, and Lily knew she had no one to blame but herself.

Yes, she knew she was still a teenager and could afford engaging in such cavalier behavior without too much consequence, but there were limits, and Lily had so foolishly ignored them all. For Morgana's sake, it had taken a bloody newspaper article to remind her that she had had a best friend running for her life from Death Eaters.

A second wave of guilt surged through Lily as Mary came to mind—another close friend and roommate who had been so insensitively shoved into the 'out of sight, out of mind' category. She had not inquired about Mary's status since November, even after vilifying Charlie Davies for his apparent lack of concern.

Lily finally grabbed a napkin and wiped her tears away. She wondered why Keira had not said anything, but then remember that Keira hardly ever the read the paper in the morning unless prompted. Lily hoped Keira would read it on her own before Lily saw her again; she didn't want to be the bearer of bad news.

Her already meager appetite gone and feeling worse than ever, Lily stood up from the table with a resolve to set things right. She couldn't do anything for Harrietta now, but she could at least get the latest news on Mary.

She made her way out the Great Hall, ignoring the amused looks her clothes garnered her. A quick search of the Hufflepuff table as she passed told her that Elias must have enjoyed an early breakfast. She was relieved he wasn't there. Seeing him would not help matters at all right now; as it was, their relationship was causing anxiety within Lily since his slipped declaration. They had not talked about it, nor had any variation of the word 'love' passed between them since then, and Lily was sick of trying to determine the motives behind their actions.

After realizing that she was taking too long to decide, Lily knew that while she did love Elias, she wasn't yet _in love_ with him, and that was okay. They had only been together for a couple of months, and she was trying to keep the physical sensations from getting the best of her. Besides, running that day and his words through her head over and over had started to wind her up so tight that she snapped at anyone who had crossed her path while lost in the memory.

Lily reached the Transfiguration classroom and made her way quickly across the empty space to McGonagall's study. She knocked lightly on the door and waited.

"Come in," McGonagall said, and Lily instantly worried at her unusually quiet voice. "Ah, Miss Evans. Please, come sit," she said, gesturing to one of the two chairs in front of her desk once Lily entered.

Upon reaching McGonagall's desk, Lily saw that she had reason to worry. The professor's nose was red to match the ruddy splotches on her cheeks and her red-rimmed eyes. Her hair was not pulled back as tightly and her hat was askew. Lily had never seen the professor look so unkempt. When Lily sat down, McGonagall finally looked at her.

"I take it you've read the _Prophet_ article about the Wenlocks," McGonagall said, her voice thin.

"Yes," Lily said, her own voice growing weak with emotion again. Seeing and hearing the usually brisk and proper professor look and sound so defeated was unsettling.

"Since You-Know-Who's first public attack in September, I've lost five good friends at the hands of the Death Eaters," Professor McGonagall said, staring down at the article, "and I mourned for them but had to move on quickly. There was and still is so much work to do to fight these Dark wizards."

Lily was confused. It seemed that McGonagall didn't realize whom she was speaking to; what 'work' was McGonagall involved in? Lily couldn't help but think that she wasn't supposed to know of any 'work' the professor might be doing against Voldemort.

"But _this_? Harrietta and Elizabeth?" McGonagall said, now covering the article her hand and shaking her head. "They were both so young, so innocent; their deaths so _unnecessary_." Her voice cracked, and she dabbed her eyes with her already tear-stained handkerchief.

Lily's chest swelled with more grief and sympathy for her professor. Whatever guilt Lily felt, McGonagall must have felt twenty-fold. The pointless death—no, _murder_—of two students would be hard on any professor, but when those students were members of your own house, whose welfare had been in your charge for several years…Lily couldn't imagine.

McGonagall suddenly looked up at Lily, seemingly surprised to see her there. She cleared her throat, stowed the paper away, and resumed her typical character, the short moment of lost control gone.

"I apologize, Miss Evans," McGonagall said briskly. "Is there something you wanted to talk about?"

"Harrietta—I just don't understand what happened," Lily said, her voice still scratchy and thick with emotion. "We had been writing, but I haven't heard from her in almost a year, and then seeing this…I don't know. I just can't believe I…I feel like such an awful friend."

McGonagall studied Lily for a moment. "Miss Evans, I hope you are not feeling any guilt over this. Your losing touch with Harrietta is not your, or anyone's, fault."

"I know, but—"

"Alberta had been in contact with Professor Dumbledore after they left, but that correspondence ended abruptly as well. You must remember that the Death Eaters specifically targeted that family," McGonagall interrupted. "Owls can be easily tracked; dropping contact with everyone here was most likely much safer for them."

Lily nodded, knowing the professor was right, but she still felt awful.

"Forgive me for what I am about to say, Miss Evans, but you are a level-headed and mature young woman whom I can trust will not take this the wrong way." McGonagall pursed her lips and took a deep breath before continuing.

"These are very Dark times, and, from what I have observed and learned from those in the thick of the fight, they will last for the next few years to come. As You-Know-Who gains more supporters, news of random disappearances and deaths of your friends, acquaintances, and former schoolmates will come more frequently, and there will be nothing you can do about it.

"It is okay to grieve; it is okay to mourn and remember, but you cannot let misplaced guilt consume you every time a loved one is lost," McGonagall continued. "The fates of their lives and the actions of others are out of our hands. The men and women who committed these murders are _evil_; don't ever let yourself feel any guilt for their heinous crimes; they are solely responsible for their actions. All we can do is stay true to our beliefs, fight if called upon, and have faith that the Light side will eventually prevail."

McGonagall fell silent, letting her words resonate. Lily had a feeling of déjà vu. She could remember Isabella saying something similar to her on the night of the first Diagon Alley attack all those months ago. She really needed to get a grip.

"Do you understand where I am coming from, Miss Evans?"

"Yes," Lily said, barely above a whisper.

"Good," McGonagall said solemnly. "Now was there anything else?"

"Er, yes, Professor," Lily said, trying to push past the thoughts of Harrietta for now. "I couldn't help but think about Mary after reading the article. Is there any update?"

McGonagall hesitated for only a moment, but it was enough to make Lily fear the worse.

"There is. Mary has been at home for the past week after waking up two weeks ago," McGonagall said, her tone a little perfunctory.

Lily felt the weight on her chest lighten a little as a sense of relief washed over her. "That's great! When is she returning to Hogwarts?"

"That question remains unanswered," McGonagall said, "and as of right now, her return has been put on hold indefinitely."

Lily's mouth fell open. That certainly made no sense. "Indefinitely? I don't understand, Professor."

"Her parents, specifically her father, are afraid she'll be attacked again," McGonagall explained.

"But Hogwarts is the safest place for her to be," Lily said insistently, though she knew McGonagall was not the one that needed convincing.

McGonagall sighed. "Try telling that to her father who, as you know, is a Muggle. He knows there are Dark wizards roaming about and gaining power. The Headmaster has already been to the Macdonald residence to help her mother convince her father that Mary should come back to Hogwarts. But Hogwarts is where she was cursed, so his lack of trust is understandable. You can understand how difficult it would be to persuade him after bringing home a daughter with skin as pale as parchment from the severe loss of blood and nearly two stone underweight after lying unconscious in a bed for nearly four months."

A lump grew in Lily's throat at the thought of Mary, so naturally beautiful, wasting away in a cold, lonely room at St. Mungo's. She hadn't thought about the situation in that light.

The bell suddenly rang and Lily jumped in her seat. She had forgotten where she was; she could collapse at the thought of going to class right now.

"And that signals the start of my day," McGonagall said, standing up and starting to gather her books and notes on her desk. Lily also stood.

"Forgive me again, Miss Evans, but you look exhausted and sound terrible," McGonagall said with a stern but sympathetic look. "Please go up to see Madam Pomfrey and then to your room to rest."

"But, Professor, those potions never work for me and—"

"I insist, Miss Evans," McGonagall interrupted as they walked back into the classroom. There were already a few students seated and chatting. "The day's news will only continue to stress you more, so please go relax. I expect to see you well-rested in class tomorrow morning."

Lily nodded with a sigh as McGonagall stepped up to the teaching platform. The professor then gave her a firm nod that she took as a dismissal. She turned and headed towards the door, letting her eyes linger on the milling first year Ravenclaw students.

How she envied them. She could remember her first year days being so carefree. She knew that they had an idea of what was currently going on outside the castle, but there were others who had the responsibility of taking care of them, to keep them distracted and safe. In fact, part of the Prefects' new duties was performing head counts of first and second years at lunch, during breaks, and after curfew. It wouldn't have been so bad if they didn't have to run around searching for missing students. She and Remus had been put in charge of the Gryffindor first years, and those little buggers were experts at getting lost at the most inconvenient times.

She wished someone could be put in charge of taking care of her, letting her concentrate on the things she really cared about and not having to worry about the budding war. No matter who it was, Lily was sure he would have taken better care of her than she had lately.

After sitting in McGonagall's study for so long, Lily began to feel lightheaded as she made her way towards the Hospital Wing, fighting against the throng of students going to class. She saw Sirius walking with Peter, and she gave him the deadliest glare she could muster, which he only returned with a skeptical smirk as he took in her appearance. Her repugnance for Sirius had increased sharply over the past week after Isabella told her and Keira about what happened at his birthday party that Lily was glad that she didn't attend. He was such a prick.

The crowd finally thinned as she reached the third floor and the second bell rang. A severe chill ran over her as she came upon the ward doors. At this point, she didn't care if whatever Pomfrey gave her worked or not; she just wanted to get back to her bed and sleep.

But _the_ _last_ person she wanted to see, far below Elias, had just opened the doors to the Hospital Wing as she made to enter. She inwardly groaned at the sight of Severus, whose red nose, rubbed raw, told her that he had been a victim of the circulating bug.

They stared at each other, Severus looking just as surprised to see her as she was to see him. This was the closest in proximity they had been since before Christmas because Lily had finally talked to Slughorn about rescheduling her extra Potions lessons, and, much to his dismay, she was now brewing advanced potions alone in the early morning hours once or twice a week.

Lily was racking her brain for something to say when she realized that she didn't _need_ to say anything. She and Severus _were not_ friends. As she made to move around him, however, he spoke.

"You've been crying."

"Well spotted," she snapped hoarsely, feeling no need to pretend civility. She stepped right to move past him, but a hand grabbed her wrist before she could enter.

"Did Smith hurt you?" Severus asked, his voice low and even.

The blood in Lily's veins instantly boiled, and she stepped back to fully look at him.

"How dare you ask such a question," she said, her voice shaking. "Elias would never make me cry. That was your job."

Severus flinched at the jibe as his hold on her wrist tightened, and Lily was happy to see him drop his eyes in what she hoped was shame for being so spiteful, but she knew she was being too naïve.

He suddenly looked up, his face still full of the concern he had assumed at the start of their encounter.

"Of course," he said thoughtfully, "you must have read the story about Harrietta."

"Don't act like you give a damn about what happened to her or her family," Lily spat. "She was killed by Death Eaters, which counts as a victory in your book, right?"

Severus flinched again at the accusation but kept his face impassive. "I'm just concerned; I know she was a close friend of yours."

"Yeah, well, I seem to be doing a fine job at losing close friends lately, don't I?" she said, with part sarcasm, part gravity. Another swell of grief rolled through her, and she felt tears prickle in her eyes. "Now let go of me," she nearly growled.

As if burned by her anger, Severus snatched his hand away, but a glint gold caught Lily's eye when his sleeve fell back a little. Before she could stop herself, she grabbed his forearm just as he had done and pulled back the sleeve of his robes.

Tightly fastened to his thin wrist was a gold watch more ornate than she had ever seen a young wizard wear. She couldn't believe she had forgotten his birthday after being the only one who had paid it any mind during the first six years of their friendship.

Severus' birthday was December 26, meaning it received little to no attention from anyone, especially his parents. As such, Lily had always gone out of her way to do something special for him. But the fact that she had completely forgotten his last birthday, easily the most important, was not what was bothering her—in fact, she took it as a good sign that she was _finally_ moving past their broken friendship.

No, what concerned her was the watch itself and from whom he had received it. It was much more than what his father, a disgusting and abusive Muggle, would ever spend on Severus or let his mother spend on him. Besides that, Lily knew Severus' father would never acknowledge his coming of age as established by wizards, watch tradition or not.

"When did you get this?"

"My birthday," he said, his voice full of cold mockery.

Lily looked up at him, her cheeks burning a little. "I meant from whom?"

Severus pulled his arm away and straightened out his sleeve without looking at her. "Not that it is any of your business, but it was a gift from Lucius Malfoy," he said, finally looking up at her. "You see, I left home on my birthday, and Lucius and his new wife so graciously took me in and gave me this watch as a token of our friendship."

Lily's stomach tightened uncomfortably as she took in Severus' words. Lucius Malfoy finished at Hogwarts when she was only a third year, but she had heard much about him through Keira, Jane, and their gossip of all the pureblood families. Even without their gossip, Lily knew that the Malfoys had been pureblood elitists for many generations, but their wealth and affluence within the community had kept them from ever being publicly criticized or questioned.

The fact that Severus had left home was not a surprise—she always thought it would have happened sooner—but his finding shelter with Lucius Malfoy was very disconcerting. Severus had envied and hated Lucius when the latter was still a student. Lucuis was all that a real Slytherin should be in Severus' eyes, and he had derided Severus on many occasions in front of the entire common room about Severus' friendship with Lily.

Now Severus and Lucius were close to the point that Lucius had taken him in and had bestowed upon him a lavish gift that was meant to be given to a son. Lily was unsure of what it all meant, but it frightened her despite her best effort to remain detached and unaffected.

"Sev," she said, dropping her initial hostility in hopes that he would see that she was being serious, "I know my opinion may not count for anything with you anymore, but please don't get caught up with Lucius Malfoy and whatever business he's involved in. I won't speculate as to what he does, but I have heard only the worse from Keira, Jane, and _you_." She stepped closer to him, not caring how desperate she looked and sounded. "Whatever it is you are looking for, you will not find it with Malfoy and his lot. You are so much better than them."

Severus stared at her. Lily knew she had caught him off guard with the intentional use of his nickname. She plainly stared back at him, hoping that he could see how sincere she was. His expression softened, and his left arm moved as if to reach out for her, but the moment of vulnerability passed quickly, and his face went stony again.

"You're right; your opinion counts for nothing," he finally said, his voice so venomous that Lily recoiled. She could think of nothing to say as he hitched his bag on his shoulder and walked away.

She swallowed against the lump forming in her throat, growing angry with herself for so carelessly throwing away the progress she had made over the past few weeks regarding Severus in just a few short minutes.

"What a morning," she grumbled as she regained her composure before entering the Hospital Wing. At this point, she knew that nothing less than the Draught of Living Death would get her through this day.

* * *

Eggs, bacon, sausage, waffles, biscuits, porridge, sweet rolls, kippers, and corn flakes.

None of it smelled or looked too appetizing to Isabella as sat staring at the spread of breakfast before her. She had been sitting at the Gryffindor table for almost five minutes without consuming a thing, but she knew she would have to force something down if she were to get rid of her headache and make it through the day.

Truth be told, Isabella was very tired and slightly hungover from the night before. She and her roommates had celebrated Lily's birthday by shutting themselves away in their dorm immediately after class and had spent the evening singing and dancing to the blasting wireless, gossiping and playing Truth or Dare, eating inordinate amounts of all the birthday cake and candy Keira had ordered and Lily had received, and guzzling down endless bottles of butterbeer and a very sweet black cherry liqueur Jane had brought back from Italy.

Isabella was sure they would have gone the whole night if Elias had not sent a note via his owl asking Lily to meet him outside the Fat Lady at 1:30. They had been able to convince a very tipsy Lily to wear nothing but her very pretty set of yellow lace bra and panties under her robes. And judging by the fact that Lily's bed was as how she left it last night, she and Elias had not been caught.

Despite Isabella, Keira, and Jane not retiring to bed until 2:30, Isabella had woken up a little past 7:00 this morning like clockwork. She was partly to blame, as she had drunkenly left her curtains open, allowing the rising sun to shine right into her bed. She really hated having the bed closest to the east-facing window.

After a bit of agitated tossing and turning, Isabella had resigned to the fact that she was not going to fall asleep again and reluctantly got out of bed to shower. Keira and Jane were still asleep when Isabella left for breakfast, and she had a feeling that they were going to be late for class.

Isabella drank a third goblet of pumpkin juice before finally reaching for a biscuit, butter, and marmalade. She then poured herself a mug of coffee and drank it straight. It tasted awful, but caffeine had always helped her headaches.

A loud, ruffling noise indicated the arrival of the morning post. Isabella glanced up at the dreary enchanted ceiling as a large barn owl landed in front of her, holding out its leg with her copy of the _Daily_ _Prophet_ tied to it. She untied it, gave it a few Knuts, and shooed it away. She began to unravel the paper when a second, more familiar owl landed exactly where the first one had taken off from.

"Benjy," Isabella said brightly, instantly feeling a little better. She stroked the chocolate brown feathers of her father's owl as it drank the dregs of juice from her goblet. Isabella untied the letter, and Benjy quickly nipped her ear and took off; she expected he was on his way to the Owlery to see her owl, Amelia.

"What's the good word, Dad?" Isabella mumbled to herself as she unfolded the letter, a small slip of paper falling to the table. Derrick's letters had become less and less frequent since the beginning of term, but Isabella knew he was busier than ever. Still, she looked forward to each one of them, as they were a breath of fresh air compared to the _Prophet_ articles and her school readings.

Isabella smiled as she read about how Nonie had offered Derrick kippers for breakfast one morning—he hated fish—and how he forced himself to eat two to avoid hurting her feelings. He then went on about how the Ministry just decided to switch to paper airplane memos after finally realizing that owls who left droppings and animal bones everywhere were not the most efficient method for intra-Ministry mail.

"You'd be surprised at how much common sense is lacking in a building full of some of the smartest witches and wizards," he wrote. "Any five-year-old could have told them that decades ago."

His letter ended with a very early birthday greeting—as it wasn't until the twelfth, next Saturday—and an early present offer for her to get anything she wanted from any store. Isabella looked at the smaller slip of paper again, and, indeed, it was a credit slip bonded by Gringotts and guaranteeing payment from her father's vault to any magical place of business.

Isabella considered it for a moment. Like most girls, she enjoyed shopping, but she had never thought herself materialistic or spoiled. However, this little slip would allow her to be just that, if only for a day, and the day she came of age seemed most fitting. She thought about splurging on some new perfume and makeup or maybe a few of those beautiful silk chemises and panties from that French lingerie shop in Diagon Alley. There were too many options; she would have to consult her friends.

She grinned at the slip before safely tucking it away in her schoolbag. At the sound of a group of familiar voices approaching the table, Isabella assumed an impassive expression before concentrating on her biscuit and newspaper again. She saw her male Gryffindor counterparts sit not too far from her out the corner of her eye.

Isabella mustered all her will to avoid looking over at them. She didn't have any issues with James, Remus, or Peter, but looking their way presented the risk of making eye contact with Sirius, which she had been very careful to avoid in the more than two weeks since his birthday. They hadn't talked at all during this time either, and even though she had wanted to distance herself as far as possible from him in Arithmancy, she had continued to sit next to him to present a cool demeanor, to show that nothing that had happened that night was affecting her.

But it couldn't have been further from the truth. Needless to say, she was still terribly embarrassed, but she was angry with herself more than anything else now, for she realized she had fallen for the game that Lily, Keira, and even Jane had warned her about.

Sirius had played her, had flirted with her and led her on until she dropped her guard and showed her entire hand that night on the tower. Isabella should have known better. There were a few boys just like Sirius sprinkled throughout Merlin who had done the same to some of her schoolmates.

And she had been such an easy target—the new girl with a strong desire for companionship and caught up in a crush over the school's resident bad boy. For all she knew, Sirius could have been planning this from the first moment they met eyes in James' house the day he ran away from home.

But despite her embarrassment and much to her annoyance, her mind had wandered back to the events of that night before Sirius' lapse into smarminess more times than she would like to admit. It was impossible to forget the feeling of his searing lips and tongue against hers, the pressure of his hands as they ran down her back to her waist, and the hardness of his body when he pulled her close. It had been intoxicating.

"Hey, Isabella."

Isabella's hand slipped at the sound of the voice as she buttered her biscuit. She looked up to find Adam Cohen standing over her shoulder, grinning down at her. The small bit of pleasure she had felt at her previous thoughts disappeared instantly.

"I've finally managed to get you alone," he said, chuckling a little as he sat down on her right uninvited.

"I guess you have." Isabella returned her attention back to her biscuit, hoping he would get the hint. She had no idea what he wanted or why he was still even trying. She could feel the eyes of Gryffindors in the vicinity on them, as it wasn't common for people from other Houses sitting at a different table unless they were dating someone.

Adam cleared his throat. "Well, I was wondering if I could personally take you into Hogsmeade during the next visit."

That caught Isabella off guard. She placed her knife down and finally looked at Adam. He was wearing a smug smile, as if she should be rejoicing over such a generous offer. It reminded her of Sirius' smirk after their kiss on his birthday.

"Hogsmeade isn't for another month," Isabella said. "I have no idea what my plans are yet."

Adam's grin grew even larger. "Exactly," he said matter-of-factly. "I figured you wouldn't have plans yet. _I_ can be your plans."

Isabella eyed him skeptically.

"Why not?" he asked, his voice a little louder now. "We obviously have a good time together; we definitely did at Black's birthday."

Isabella's mouth fell open at the insinuation, especially with so many attentive ears around them. "We only _talked_ at Sirius' birthday, and that was for five minutes."

"So we should take more time to get to know each other," Adam insisted, his confidence still brimming. "I promise to show you a _great_ time."

Had those words come from anyone else, Isabella would have been intrigued, but she had a sneaking suspicion that Adam's idea of a good time involved a dark corner and seeing how many feel-ups he could get in before they were due back at the castle.

There weren't dozens of boys lining up trying to gain her affection, and Isabella knew she shouldn't be so picky, but there was something about Adam she just wasn't comfortable with. He had made a bad impression on her first authorized trip to Hogsmeade and had been nothing but a foolishly persistent, smarmy, and annoying git since then.

She looked over to the Ravenclaw table, where she saw his friends staring openly at them with smirks of their own. His brother Andy, however, looked mortified. She needed an out, or this wasn't going to end well. Where were her damn roommates when she needed them?

Apparently Isabella had been silent for too long because Adam scooted closer to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close.

"So what do you say?" he asked cheerfully, jostling her a little.

Isabella was about to push him away when she glanced over at the guys. None of them were paying her and Adam the least bit of attention…except for Sirius. His eyes were narrowed as he stared at them, but he was still wearing an unmistakable smirk. He was enjoying this far too much—her being accosted by Adam _again_ and Sirius not caring one bit. It angered and upset her. But the anger won out.

And before she could stop herself and knowing she would regret it later, she turned back to Adam with the biggest, most suggestive, but fakest smile she could muster.

"I'd love to go with you."

* * *

_I am starting to lose my mind, I think._

Isabella knew it was a melodramatic way to start her letter to Jasmine and Lana, but it was the truth. She had just given up on her Arithmancy problem set after competing just one problem in the past hour she had been in the library, cloistered in a dark corner. She hardly ever came here, but she had desperately wanted to avoid a certain someone in the common room. Her mind was still reeling from the events that had occurred at breakfast.

She was going to Hogsmeade. With Adam. Voluntarily.

"What the hell was I thinking?" she muttered to herself for what seemed like the hundredth time today. The only consolation she had was the fact that as she excused herself from Adam's embrace and the table, she chanced another glance at Sirius and was happy to note that his smirk had melted into an ugly scowl. Her smiled broadened as she left the Great Hall.

But that haughty feeling vanished quickly as the news spread among her sixth year classmates, no doubt started by Adam. For some reason, it seemed a common assumption that she and Adam had been flirting for a while and that their date had been a long-time coming. How or why, she wasn't sure, but it horrified her.

By the time she saw her roommates during their first break, Lily and Keira only stared at her as if she had lapsed into insanity while Jane collapsed onto her bed, gasping for air from laughing so hard. It was then she realized that her pride and the lingering sting of Sirius' rejection had forced her into making the dumbest decision since starting at Hogwarts.

Giggles from the only occupied table nearby distracted Isabella from her letter. She looked over and saw Dorcas Meadows and Thalia Crake whispering behind their hands. She sincerely hoped whatever gossip they were sharing wasn't about her. But then she felt conceited again for thinking that her personal life was interesting enough to intrigue the whole school.

"Oh, but it kind of is," Jane had said after Isabella expressed the same thought earlier today. "You're the new girl who's agreed to go out with a guy that most of us have learned to stay away from after witnessing his relationship with Delilah." She then burst into more gales of laughter.

Isabella jumped at Dorcas' sudden squeal that she quickly tried to stifle. She looked over at the two Ravenclaws who were both giggling again; Isabella was surprised Madam Grimes had not come from around a book stack, wagging an admonishing finger.

"He was there, between those two stacks," Dorcas whispered, pointing to the far side of the Invisibility section. "I bet he's looking for you," she said, now looking at Thalia and waggling her eyebrows.

"Are you sure it was him? He never comes to the library," Thalia said skeptically, though she started rummaging through her bag. After a few seconds, she pulled out a compact mirror and starting fixing her hair.

Isabella surreptitiously glanced over to wear Dorcas had been pointing to and saw who 'he' was. It was Sirius, skulking through the stacks quite obviously looking for someone. He rounded another bookcase, and they suddenly made eye contact briefly before Isabella quickly looked away.

"Goddamn it," Isabella whispered angrily. Was there nowhere she could go in the castle without running into him? She hoped he hadn't seen her, but she knew he had. She could only wish now that he was indeed looking for Thalia, as much as it stung.

She held her breath and tried to focus her attention back on her letter, but she felt, rather than heard, him approaching her table. She then heard an indignant huff come from Dorcas and Thalia's table.

"Here you are."

Isabella was instantly annoyed at how jovial his voice sounded considering they were the first words he had said to her in nearly three weeks. She continued to stare at her letter, not saying a word.

"I didn't think you frequented the library often; I've been looking for you everywhere."

She finally raised her head to look at him, her face impassive. "And know you've found me." He grinned, and Isabella's resolve softened a little despite her frustration.

"I need to talk to you about something," he said, moving around the table and sitting in the chair next to her. His cologne, some spice scent she had been trying to place since their trip to Hogsmeade, wafted towards her, and she slightly turned away from him to look back at her letter. She wanted to appear unaffected, but she couldn't help but be intrigued by whatever compelled him to search for her.

Sirius cleared his throat. "Well, I couldn't help but hear about you going into Hogsmeade with one of those Cohen brothers in a few weeks."

'_One of those Cohen brothers,'_ Isabella thought with a snort. He knew exactly whom she was going with. _Transparent jerk_.

"What about it?"

"I don't think you should go with him."

"You don't?"

"No."

Isabella set her quill down and turned to face Sirius, instantly regretting the action. He was so annoyingly handsome that it was difficult remaining angry with him. If they weren't in the library right now, she would have kissed him.

_God, I'm pathetic_.

"Then with whom should I be going?" she asked, happy that she was in the library and had to keep her voice low; otherwise, he would know he was winning by how breathy her voice was.

Sirius raised an eyebrow and grinned again. "Me," he said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Isabella's heart took flight. "Why you?"

"Because you'll have a better time with me."

_I know I would_. But she remained quiet and looked away again.

This game they were playing was getting old. How long were they going to spin in these passive-aggressive circles of flirting then ignoring then kissing then ignoring again?

Isabella bit her lip and decided to throw all caution to the wind. She turned back and looked directly into his eyes, suddenly wishing this was taking place anywhere but the library.

"Sirius, I like you. That is to say, I fancy you, or however you phrase it here," she said, shaking her head. "Only Merlin knows why, but I do." Her heart was still beating fast from before; his expression remained unchanged.

"And I was under the impression, considering what's taken place between us over the past couple of months, that the feeling might be mutual." She swallowed hard against the bile rising in her throat. "Is it?"

Sirius remained silent, but he was now looking at her as if he didn't know who she was. Isabella immediately felt stupid.

"Come to Hogsmeade with me," Sirius finally said, his voice low.

Isabella shook her head. She didn't want to give in just to have him play her again.

"Answer the question first."

"Just come to Hogsmeade with me," he repeated.

"I am not going to heartlessly break a date with someone without a good reason."

Sirius chuckled softly a bit, which broke some of the tension. "'Heartlessly break a date?' Come on, Isabella; you don't want to want to go to Hogsmeade with Adam. You only said 'yes' to spite me."

Isabella's cheeks burned, but she narrowed her eyes. "You think so?"

"I know so."

"You're an ass," Isabella said irritably. "And yes, I meant _ass_."

"It's not my fault—" He abruptly cut off as Madam Grimes came lurking between nearby stacks. They weren't being loud, but Madam Grimes would still find a reason to dismiss them from the library. Isabella took the moment to glance over at Dorcas and Thalia. They were concentrating a little too hard on their assignments in front of them, and Isabella knew they were trying to listen in.

"I'm not responsible for how you interpreted a bit of flirtation over the last few months," Sirius said through a smirk. "I hope you're not the type that expects to become the girlfriend of every guy you kiss."

His words felt like a slap to the face. _A bit of flirtation?_

"Alright, I get it," Isabella said tightly, starting to gather her things. "I'll leave you be."

"Wait," he said, grabbing her arm before she could stand. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Like what?" Isabella snapped. Embarrassment and anger were mixed in her voice.

"Like you're desperate or something." He frowned and shook his head. "I mean—look, just come to Hogsmeade with me."

"Answer the question," Isabella sighed. "Just yes or no."

"Why are you being so bloody stubborn?"

Isabella scoffed. "Me, stubborn? You're the one telling—not _asking_—me to go to Hogsmeade with you, and _I'm_ being stubborn?"

"Yeah," he said grinning.

"I'll go with you if you answer the question," Isabella said, feeling like she should give this up. She had already been humiliated enough today. "Is the feeling mutual?"

She held her breath. If he said 'yes,' then they'd take off from here, but if he said 'no,' it would be time to get over this crush and stop letting Sirius make her feel like a fool.

He was staring at her again, and Isabella began to grow uncomfortable under his steely gaze. Why couldn't he just put his damn pride aside and give her a straight answer?

"Come to Hogsmeade with me."

Isabella sighed resignedly and grabbed her bag. "I see I'm wasting my time here." She stood up, but this time Sirius didn't try to stop her. She was walked around to the other side of the table before looking back; he wasn't looking at her.

"If you're that desperate for a date, I'm pretty sure Thalia over there wouldn't mind going with you," she said, not caring to hide her spiteful tone. She then turned and rushed out of the library as fast as she could without running. Madam Grimes watched her beadily as she zoomed past the reference desk.

Once in the corridor, she began walking towards the main staircase but stopped and hid herself in a dark alcove. She felt like shit. She had never had boy issues like this or let her life get consumed with such triviality. Why was she letting Sirius make such a fool out of her? She suddenly had the desire to burst into tears, but couldn't decide if it was due to the effects of her upcoming monthly or frustration and exhaustion.

The library doors opened, and Sirius came storming out. Isabella sank further into the alcove as he looked up and down the corridor before fiercely punching his hand and stalking off in the opposite direction. He was clearly agitated.

_Good_, Isabella thought savagely. She hoped _her_ rejection dented his stupid ego at least a little bit.

But she didn't feel better. She felt bitter, confused, irritated, mortified, and dejected. But at least she knew it was time to move on.

* * *

**Stay tuned ;)**


	16. Teenage Love Affair

**A/N: Chapter contains adult content.**

* * *

James wasn't sure what exactly he had done to deserve this, but he wasn't going to waste time questioning his good fortune.

Besides, trying to think was nearly impossible when Delilah was standing before him, undressing in a most agonizingly slow and teasing manner. She was going to have to hurry up, or he was going to end up dragging her into the water himself.

He was currently standing in neck-deep, lavender-scented warm water in the tub of the Prefects' bathroom. It had been Delilah's idea to take advantage of his Captain privileges and spend a bit of private time there; especially considering how bad the weather had been lately—severely windy and bitterly cold. James was honestly surprised that he had not thought of the idea himself before now.

He only hoped no one else was scheduled for this time. Another student wouldn't be able to get inside; but he feared that the inconvenienced Prefect or Captain might go squealing to a professor, and James would have a hard time explaining why he was using the Prefects' bathroom at 11:00 PM on a Friday night when his scheduled time was at 7:00 PM on Tuesday evenings—a ridiculously stupid time, he thought—and with a girl, no less.

But he tried not to worry about that now. He had a Quidditch game in the morning and desperately needed to release some tension. Spending some much needed quality time with his girlfriend was an added bonus at this point.

"Delilah, you're killing me here," James whined as she shimmied out of her knickers and threw them on the pile of their clothes. He began to stroke himself under the foam in anticipation, no longer able to deny the effect her striptease was having on his body.

She giggled as she walked over and descended the small set of stairs into the tub. "I guess I should be flattered by your overwhelming need to have me," she said, her voice already thick with desire. She swam the short distance between them, immediately reaching for his manhood and frowning when she felt his hands there.

"You started without me," she simpered. "No fair."

"I warned that you were taking too long," James said as he removed his hands and let her takeover. He moaned in relief.

"Then you'll just have to make it up to me," she whispered as she continued her firm strokes.

James placed his hands on her shoulders and began guiding her towards the edge of the tub. "Whatever you want."

Her face lit up. "Those are my favorite words out of your mouth."

James kissed her roughly and forced his tongue into her mouth quickly as she hit the edge of the tub, not wanting the conversation to stray to the words he knew she _really_ wanted to hear him say.

Delilah brought her arms up to rest on the marble floor before slightly rising on her elbows for leverage. She broke the kiss and grinned at him as he grabbed her hips roughly.

The tip of his length was throbbing against her entrance; he couldn't wait any longer. "Did you—"

"Yes," she whispered urgently, and without wasting another second, James pushed up into her with a moan.

They moved slowly at first, both reveling in the new sensation provided by the warm water and slick foam between them, but soon their movements grew desperate, and James closed his eyes to lose himself in the feeling. It had been over a week since they had enjoyed sufficient alone time, due primarily to two nights of the full moon and Delilah catching the cold that had gone around.

James felt his glasses begin to slip as the sweat on his face mingled with the steam rising from the water. He opened his eyes and removed them; they had started to fog up anyways.

He looked back at Delilah. She looked glorious-her mouth was slightly open, her skin flushed, and her head thrown back in obvious pleasure, giving him free access to her neck. But her breasts bouncing in time with his thrusts were more appealing, and he took one into his mouth as he slowed his movements, knowing that she still needed time.

His name fell from her lips in encouraging whispers as he moved his mouth from one breast to the other. One hand slipped from her hip to where they were joined and began to rub her feverishly. She inhaled sharply in response.

"Fuck…James," she whimpered as she pulled his face away from her chest and forced him to look at her. Her hazel eyes were blazing; he knew she was close.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him firmly. James felt her shudder against his hand just seconds later, and she screamed her release into his mouth. She pulled back from the kiss and rested against the wall of the tub, panting heavily. James kept a leisurely pace, letting her come down slowly from her peak, but he knew he wouldn't be able to control himself much longer as her walls continued to clench around him.

Delilah sat back up once she had calmed down, grinning lazily, and started to move with him again. James grinned back and started to speed up his pace, frantic for his own release now. She wrapped her legs securely around his waist and her arms around his shoulders again, clutched him tightly to her and allowing him to deepen his thrusts.

Barely a minute passed before his whole body tensed. He grunted and bit down hard on her neck as he came; Delilah dug her nails into his back in response.

His legs were shaking from the effort of supporting them both, but he was finally relaxed. His body felt loose, and his mind was clear. He felt himself slip out of her, and he tried to disentangle himself from her grasp, but she held on tightly.

"Delilah, love," he said, trying to keep the exasperation out of his voice, "I can barely hold myself up anymore, much less both of us. Let's get out of here before we sink and drown."

She giggled and finally pulled back. He grabbed her hand and led her up the steps and out of the tub. He searched for his wand within his clothes, finally extracting it from his robes. Shivering a little, Delilah wrapped her arms around him from behind and kissed his shoulder as he transfigured the towels into a pile of blankets and cushions.

"Come on, you're freezing," he said, settling onto the blankets and bringing her down with him. He lied on his back, and she lied on her side, resting her head on his chest. He pulled a blanket up to cover them, knowing it was a dangerous move since he couldn't afford to fall asleep here tonight—not before a game—but he thought they should share some closeness before suggesting that they leave.

"James," she sighed into his skin, and he immediately felt apprehensive. She rose up slightly and looked directly into his eyes. "Do you have any idea how you make me feel?"

Her skin was still flushed, and her eyes were eager. James swallowed hard at the question; the pleasure he had felt just minutes ago seemed to vanish. She was doing it again, building like she was about to say 'I love you' to goad him into saying it first. She had done it three other times since they started having sex just a week after returning to school.

Without answering her or waiting for her to answer her own question, James wrapped a hand around her neck, lifted his head, and kissed her—slowly and passionately this time, in hopes it would suffice for now. He felt like a pillock each time he did it, but he refused to be scammed into saying something he just didn't feel yet.

Would he ever feel that way about her? He wasn't sure but thought it was possible. The things he had originally liked about her—her genuine interest in Quidditch, inquisitive nature, tolerance of his friends, and abhorrence for couple codependency—were still there, even a bit stronger. He would acknowledge that he cared about her—more so than his previous girlfriends—especially since the bit of tension that had still lingered from New Year's Eve had finally vanished, although not surprisingly so at the same time they had started shagging.

And the fact that Delilah had given it up as soon as she did still baffled him. Maybe it was her way of getting over her expectations that had been the reason for their prolonged friction, but the fact she was pulling this little stunt of hers after _every_ shag made him think otherwise. It seemed that if she couldn't guilt jewelry out of him to signify their affection, she was going to bang it out of him—that whole caught up in the moment type thing he despised. But what she didn't know was that James had already learned his lesson after making that mistake with his last girlfriend, Katie Darringer.

Delilah broke the kiss and smiled down at him, but there was disappointment in her eyes; she knew he had purposely avoided the issue again. She lied back down with her head on his chest and began to lightly graze her nails along and across his torso. He wondered why she kept bringing it up when she knew how he was going to respond. James wasn't even sure if she really loved him or just wanted the satisfaction of him falling hard for her first.

"Will you tell me about Remus?"

James, who had been concentrating on the movement of her fingers, started a bit. She had succeeded in catching him off guard; he could feel her smile against his skin.

"What about him?"

"Anything," she said. "He has an admirer who has asked me to—"

"To coax whatever you could out of _me_," he interrupted. "And how convenient you choose to do it after a particularly good shag."

Delilah rose up quickly, her face anxious. "I promise that wasn't my intention, it just—"

"Calm down; I'm not mad," he chuckled, and he really wasn't. It was the same shit any guy would pull; except that guys were typically trying to get something purely physical. But the fact she was trying to gen up on Remus worried him a bit; he had a feeling where this conversation might go. "Who's the admirer?"

She bit her lip. "Swear to me you won't blab about it."

"I swear," he said, placing his left hand over his heart. What she didn't see was the crossed fingers of his right hand resting on her lower back.

"Marlene," she said, trying not to smile.

"McKinnon?" James didn't bother trying to hide his disbelief.

Delilah nodded before lying back down on his chest. "Surprising, huh? But I guess they've been patrolling more often than usual lately. She always likes what he has to say in Prefect meetings, thinks he's smart, and…well, I don't need to go into detail about what else she's said about him, but she _is_ interested."

James grinned. Marlene was a fit girl, and Remus would probably be flattered by her interest, though most likely downright skeptical at first. But unfortunately for her, it was too late. James didn't know too many details about what was going on between Remus and Keira; he just knew it was going on well.

"So…do you think Remus would be interested?"

"I'm not sure, to be honest."

"Why not?" Delilah demanded. "Marlene is a great girl."

"I never said she wasn't," James said defensively.

"Hmm…unless he's already interested in someone," she speculated. "Is he?"

James frowned, knowing he shouldn't be talking about his friend's personal life, but he knew it was the only way to end this pointless discussion.

"He's more than interested in someone else," James said. "He's seeing someone."

Delilah shot up again, smirking doubtfully. "You're lying." James only shook his head, and her mouth fell open. "Who?"

He shook his head again. "Sorry, love, can't tell you that. He has his reasons why he hasn't been too public with it yet, and I won't be the one to do it for him. It's not my place."

"You know I won't tell anyone."

He raised his eyebrows. "Really? You wouldn't tell Marlene that he's taken when you know she fancies him?" Delilah looked indignant and was about to speak when he cut her off. "I'm not saying it's a bad thing; I would do the same for my friends before they ended up making a fool of themselves. But then you know it would eventually make its way to Dorcas and—"

"And what?" she interrupted huffily.

"Come on, Delilah," James sighed. "Dorcas can't keep her trap shut. You've said it yourself."

She scowled. "I know, but—"

"You just want to know," James finished. "I get it. By the looks of things, you just might find out sooner than later, but I can't tell you anything before then."

Still frowning, Delilah lied back down. James knew she was annoyed. It was probably another one of her tests—to see if he trusted her enough to share what he talked about only with his mates.

"I guess it's all for the best then," she said, her voice a little flat. "I warned her that Remus wouldn't be able to devote too much time anyways if he's always running off to take care of his grandmother every few weeks. Which, honestly, doesn't make much sense. If he's taking care of his ill grandmother, then why does _he_ always return looking sickly?"

James' body tensed. This is what he had been expecting. He wondered how far she would take it.

"I've been trying to figure out what could _really_ be going on, you know."

_Of course you have, you're a Ravenclaw_, James thought darkly. He thought that maybe she had noticed that the days he, Peter, and Sirius completely disappeared after dinner corresponded with the days that Remus was away 'taking care of his grandmother.'

"Maybe Remus is the one who is sick but doesn't want anyone to know. I'm sure _you_ know more about it, but '_it's not your place_' to discuss it, right?" she said scathingly.

Apparently she was more upset than he initially thought. His jaw tightened in response.

"It's not," he said, doing a better job at controlling his irritation than she had done. He didn't want to start another stupid row.

She bristled. "I even asked my father about it the last time I was home—asked him if he knew of any cyclic illnesses that were serious enough to force someone to leave school as frequently as Remus does. It's monthly isn't it?"

James remained quiet. She was trying to goad him again, but this time he was actually anxious. She had hit closer to home than anyone else ever had—besides Snape.

"Anyway, he said there were serious diseases, spattergroit for instance, but nothing that would affect him at regular intervals," she continued on. "Either way, my father said he couldn't be trusted, that there's no way to know what Remus is really up to."

"Well, bollocks to your father," James snapped before he could stop himself; his blood was boiling.

"How dare you say that!" Delilah spat, rising up and looking angrily down at him.

James sat up, forcing her off and looking at her in disbelief. "How dare _I_ say that? What about your father? He knows nothing about Remus of his situation but is instructing you to not trust him? Has Remus ever given you any reason to suspect he's up to something? You don't even know him. And what did you expect my reaction to be, when you're talking so contemptuously about someone you know is one of my best friends?" He closed his eyes and clenched his fists, tying to regain composure. "I don't understand what you're trying to do here."

"Just trying to create some intimacy beyond the _physicial_," she said, sounding a little hurt, but when James opened his eyes, he saw that she was still glaring at him. "You know, share more about ourselves and those close to us—what normal people in a relationship do."

"Right, because I'm sure you've shared every bit of private information about yourself and your friends with me," James said, his voice hard. "If I asked you to tell me all of Thalia's shag partners—not that I _care_—you would call me a pig."

"So it's okay to just lie to me?"

"Just because I don't share everything with you, does not mean I am lying to you," James said as if explaining things to a child. He just couldn't believe this argument was happening. It was as if all rational thinking had jumped out the window.

"Then why can't you just trust me?" she said, her voice half pleading.

"It's not an issue of trust with you," James said, trying to control his voice again. "It's a matter of the trust that my mates have with me, who, frankly, were here before you and to whom I am loyal first. And relationships are about _building_ trust over time, not something you assume almost immediately. It's the reason why most normal people don't get married or, hell, even fuck within two days of meeting each other. Which I thought would be common sense, especially for a Ravenclaw."

Delilah looked as if she had been slapped. Without a word, she reached for her undergarments and hastily put them on. She then wrapped her school robes tightly around her without bothering to put on her other clothes, stuffing them into her bag instead.

"Good luck tomorrow," she said with no emotion before turning and leaving the bathroom. The clicks of her heels on the marble floor echoed oddly throughout the room.

James didn't bother going after her, though he vaguely worried about her getting back to Ravenclaw Tower without incident. It was well past curfew, after all; maybe he should have followed her with the map to ensure she got back safe.

"Damn it all," he said, deciding to stay where he was.

The whole thing was ridiculous. What had been really rich was him offering how relationships were suppose to work when all his previous ones had fallen to shit, and it looked like this one was about to take the same course. Despite his anger, though, that fact slightly upset him.

He lied back down, not yet ready to head back to the common room. "I guess it was fun while it lasted," he muttered.

* * *

For the first time in his nearly six years at Hogwarts, James was not looking forward to Quidditch.

He had played in driving rain, he had practiced in gale force winds, and he had run drills during a thunderstorm, but he had never played a game in some freakish combination of all three.

James was currently standing in the entrance of the Quidditch tent in his Quidditch robes, staring at the horrible weather and waiting for the rest of his team to finish dressing for the match. It was so cold that he wouldn't be surprised if it started hailing or snowing soon, and visibility was just awful.

He sighed as he turned backed into the tent and walked to his chalkboard depicting the now useless plays they had worked on all week. There was a loud crack of thunder followed by screams as his team rushed into the tent. Corrine Yates and Emmeline Vance, the only girls on the team, were ahead of the rest, and James figured the screams must have come from them.

"You're going to have to get a grip if you expect to play somewhat decently today," James snapped.

"But it's started hailing!" Corrine said indignantly as she sat down on one of the benches.

Emmeline removed her hood before adding, "They're as big as gobstones!"

"Oh balls," James muttered, wondering what else could go wrong. "Everyone take a seat."

The team obeyed, and most of them began to cast drying charms at once.

"So there's no point in denying it: conditions are terrible," James began, trying his best to avoid sounding defeated. He had to shout slightly to be heard over the din of hail hitting the tent.

"And I would normally never pin the success of a game entirely on one player, but, Emmeline, you're going to have to catch that Snitch as quickly as you can," he said, looking to his Seeker. "It's going to be near impossible for me, Corrine, and Oscar to keep control of the Quaffle and run plays to score."

Emmeline nodded without hesitancy, indicating to James that she had probably already expected this. He had always admired her determination.

James then looked to Ted Knowles and Micah Wemberly, his Beaters. "That Elias Smith is probably going to run a similar plan, so I need you to concentrate on protecting Emmeline since his Beaters are going to be focusing their attacks on her, as you should do with whomever their new Seeker is since Yancey didn't come back."

"Plies, I think it is," Ted offered.

"That burly git?" James asked incredulously, thinking of the tall, broad Hufflepuff sixth year. "Maybe I've given Smith too much credit."

The team continued to discuss the new game plan for another five minutes until they heard, just barely over the howling wind, the shouts of students as they left the castle and headed toward the pitch. He was honestly surprised; if he had not been playing today, he sure as hell would have been relaxing in the warm and dry castle.

"Alright, that's our cue. Just remember to play the best you can while staying safe. I want everyone to cast an impervious charm on them before heading back out and make sure to strengthen it as needed throughout the game," James said as he pulled out his wand.

They all cast the charm on themselves before pulling on their goggles and grabbing their brooms.

James then led them out of the tent and groaned as soon as he was outside. The impervious charm blocked the worst of the rain and wind, but he could still feel the pressure from the incessant hail trying to penetrate the charm's protection.

The team trudged through the muddy grass to the center of the pitch where the referee and Hufflepuff team were already waiting. James looked up to the stands and saw that mostly Gryffindor and Hufflepuff students had come out; everyone in the stands was holding heavy, large umbrellas. There was only a smattering of Slytherin and Ravenclaw students, which James quickly noted did not include Delilah or any of her friends.

James watched Madam Hooch say the usual directions, as he couldn't hear her over the noise of the rain and wind. He only knew it was time to shake hands when Smith raised his own. James shook it swiftly before mounting his broom. He barely heard the whistle and kicked off only when he saw Ted rise up beside him.

Flying up into the storm was worse. He was unsure how, but Corrine had somehow gained control of the Quaffle, despite it and the players being thrown about like ragdolls. He didn't bother trying to fly after her to assist her. Even if they could assume a flying pattern, trying to pass the ball between them would be pointless.

And so that's how the next thirty minutes went: haphazard flying, blown score attempts, and unnecessary dives to save goals that would never make it through the hoops.

James flew disinterestedly, feeling miserable. He had only had four hours of horribly agitated sleep; his row with Delilah would not leave his mind. He was confident is his stance, but he just couldn't understand why Delilah would deliberately start such an irrational argument. What was she trying to prove?

"Get a grip!" he suddenly growled to himself. He knew he couldn't afford to get distracted during a Quidditch game, especially one with such horrible conditions as this.

He kept an eye on Emmeline as she zoomed around the pitch followed by Ted and Micah; Plies doing the same in the other direction. James had been right: Smith had been thinking of the same tactic. The Hufflepuff Beaters were tailing Plies while hitting the Bludgers towards Emmeline.

Even flying closer to the ground, James could not hear anything but wind and the hail dinging on the goal posts—no commentating, no cheering. His mind wandered back to last night, trying to figure out what could have triggered Delilah's actions. Nothing out of the ordinary had happened, unless you count his fourth evasion of saying what she wanted to hear.

He was knocked out of his thoughts as his knee hit something hard. He swerved around and saw that he had almost flown into a Hufflepuff goal post. He glanced up and saw Smith eyeing him oddly with a smirk, but Corrine approached wildly and took advantage of Smith's distraction, throwing the Quaffle through the middle hoop. It was her second goal, and only the third of the entire game.

James grinned through the pain in his knee, glaring back at Smith, who looked foolish. James was suddenly spun around again as Emmeline went zooming by him. She was diving, and James prayed she had found the Snitch.

His impervious charm started to fade but James didn't care; he was concentrating on Emmeline and Ted and Micah, who were close behind her and knocking away the Bludgers that the Hufflepuff Beaters, who were coming up on them fast, had just hit their way.

James knew he should get out of the line of fire as Plies whizzed by him to reach Emmeline, but he was too late.

"Potter!" He faintly heard Corrine scream his name. He turned sharply towards her but only had enough time to register the Bludger only a meter away flying towards his face before his whole world went black.

* * *

_Ow, ow, ow_

.

James' head felt as if it was caught in a vice, and it was pounding with excruciating pain. This last thing he remembered was flying around the Quidditch pitch, but now he was lying down. The rigidity of the bed, the stiffness of the sheets, and the smell of disinfectant and Skele-gro told him he was not in his dormitory but in the Hospital Wing.

He opened his eyes and saw one blurry figure sitting on a stool near the end of the bed, its face hidden behind a book. He reached blindly for his glasses on the table that usually sat to the left of each bed, but his hands hit what felt like small boxes and wrapped packages, and many of them fell to the floor.

The person sitting on the stool jumped at the sound and gasped. "James, you're awake."

It was Delilah. Now he was definitely confused.

He tried to sit up, but she quickly approached him and pushed him gently back down.

"Wait, let me help."

James wanted to retort that he didn't need her damn help but didn't have the energy to be a prick right now. He saw her reach into the bedside table drawer, pull out his glasses, and hand them to him. As he put them on, she grabbed extra pillows from the neighboring bed.

"Can you sit up?" she asked, turning back towards him but not looking at him.

James bent his arms and tried to push himself up, which was harder than he had anticipated. He was surprised at how heavy his head felt. Delilah reached out a hand, and he instinctively grabbed it. She pulled him up before stuffing more pillows behind him so that he could sit up comfortably.

"Thanks," he muttered as she quickly bent down to pick up the things he had knocked off the table. Sitting there was an huge pile of what he assumed was every single confection Honeydukes sold, including maybe 50 packages of Fizzing Whizbees, which many people knew were his favorite.

"You have a lot of well-wishers," she said when she saw him eyeing the candy.

James turned back to her; she was smiling. He then glanced around the Hospital Wing and saw dark skies outside the window. The lamps along the wall burned brightly, and he was the only occupant.

"What time is it?" he asked.

"Just past 6:30…on Sunday evening."

_Sunday evening?_

"I've been asleep this whole time?"

Delilah nodded slowly. "Madam Pomfrey said something about skull bones being the most difficult and painful to heal than others, so she thought it best to sedate you."

"Great," he said, feeling more like shit. "What exactly happened?"

She sat tentatively on the edge of his bed. "A Bludger hit you square in the face," she explained. "Broke your nose, shattered your cheek bone, and cracked your forehead. I'm not sure how it happened, though; I wasn't at the game."

She mumbled that last part and was now blushing, looking away. James raised his hand to the side of his face that was throbbing. It felt normal structurally, but it was definitely tender. He looked back at Delilah; she was still avoiding his gaze and fidgeting with the hem of her jumper.

"Have you been here the whole time?"

Delilah finally looked at him. It was then he noticed her pale skin and bloodshot eyes. "Most of the time. I was here with your team and Sirius, Peter, and Remus yesterday until Pomfrey kicked us out at 8:00. I came back around noon today; the boys and team were here, but Pomfrey chivvied them out at dinnertime. She let me stay, though, until your friends came back."

James wished that he had woken up to Sirius, Remus, and Peter watching over him because then he would only be feeling pain, not any of this awkwardness and lingering irritation from their argument Friday night, which he definitely remembered. However, he had to admit that, despite it all, he was appreciative to have her here. It meant that she was still invested, at the very least.

"Thanks," he said, rather lamely.

She smiled. "It's nothing."

They stared at each other for a silent moment. James felt he should say something, but he thought himself lucky that he was able to sit up right now. Trying to have a serious relationship talk at this moment would take too much effort and concentration that he just didn't have.

Delilah, on the other hand, seemed willing and sighed heavily. "James, I'm really sor—"

But she was cut off by the Hospital Wing doors opening and his friends walking inside, led by Sirius. He and Peter were laughing uncontrollably about something, while Remus was trying, unsuccessfully, to keep a straight face.

"Still nearly half of them missing from dinner," Sirius sniggered. "That was some real potent stuff—" He stopped short at the sight of Delilah; Remus and Peter did the same behind him.

"Prongs, you're awake!" Peter cheered. "How are you feeling?"

"Full of beans. Like I've won a million Galleons," James said derisively.

Remus glanced at Delilah briefly and gave him a questioning look. "If you want us to leave, we can come back later."

"No, it's fine," Delilah said immediately. She stood up from the bed, stuffed her book in her bag, and turned back to James. "I'll see you soon." Then, hesitating a bit, she lifted a hand and gently swept back the hair from his eyes.

James closed his eyes at her cool touch. When he opened them again, Deliliah had already turned and walked away, avoiding the stares of his friends. They approached the bed with inquisitive faces.

"What was that?" Sirius said as he snatched up a Chocolate Frog from the table and took Delilah's previous seat. Remus seized the stool, and Peter sat at the foot of the bed

"I think she's feeling guilty for a row we had Friday night."

Remus cocked an eyebrow.

"I don't want to talk about it," he said shortly. "I'm just glad you came when you did or I might have choked on the awkwardness." He then looked desperately between them. "Please tell me you brought some—"

"How could you doubt us?" Sirius asked through a mouth full of chocolate. "Wormtail, get the screen,"

Peter jumped up and dragged the nearby screened towards James' bed to block the line of sight from Pomfrey's office window. Remus then reached into his robes and pulled out a small bottle of firewhiskey.

"Thank Merlin," James said, grabbing the bottle and chugging over half the contents. The liquor burned down his throat and pooled in his empty stomach. He knew he should probably eat something, but right now he was more concerned with dulling the pain. "Now tell me what the fuck happened."

Sirius looked at the others, who nodded at him, and took the lead. "I don't know what had you distracted out there, but at one point, you were flying near the Hufflepuff goal posts—almost ran right into one. Appeared as if you hit your knee. Do you remember that?"

"Vaguely."

"You continued to weave through the goal posts, watching as Vance and our Beaters flew by," Peter explained. "The Bludgers were flying everywhere when the Hufflepuff Seeker and Beaters caught up with Emmeline. The Snitch was hovering right at the base of the left post; I saw it with my Omnioculars. "

"Towler hit a Bludger towards Vance to knock her off course, but the wind caught it, and it flew towards you instead," Sirius continued. "You turned around too late, and, well…" He trailed off, gesturing at the bed.

James shook his head, feeling incredibly stupid. "I don't know what I was doing. I just wasn't paying attention."

Remus frowned. "To be honest, not many people were. Most of them were trying to shield themselves from the hail and weren't watching the game. It wasn't until Lily screamed did people noticed that something was going on at the Hufflepuff end of the pitch."

"There was a ton of blood, and you were falling fast, but the team caught you quickly, and Dumbledore was already running towards the field," Peter said.

"And what about the game?" James asked, fearing the worst. The shifty glances shared between the other three only cemented his worry. "_Well?_"

They continued to stall, but Remus eventually sighed.

"The entire team flew towards you to bring you down safely, including Emmeline…and the Hufflepuffs took advantage of the distraction. Plies caught the Snitch," he said, scowling a bit.

James felt a sense of failure at his first loss as Quidditch Captain, but the firewhiskey kept him from getting too angry. "It's to be expected. Professional Quidditch games aren't paused for every injury."

"So you're saying the team should have kept playing and let you fall to the ground?" Sirius asked skeptically. "It's one thing to continue play when a player fouls another, but your skull was shattered and you were knocked unconscious. Smith advising his team to keep playing is just piss poor sportsmanship; you would have never done that."

"Admittedly, though, none of them listened to him, except for Plies," Remus quickly explained. "The others were just as worried for you."

"Huh, and here I was thinking Smith and Plies were alright," James said cynically. He took another drink of firewhiskey, finishing the bottle. "If I were one for petty revenge, I'd be out of this bed and devising a plan to get them back right now."

Sirius grinned mischievously. "I had a feeling you'd say that, which is why we already made a move."

"What did you do?" James asked, torn between exasperation and enthusiasm.

"Went straight to the kitchens after the game, knowing that the Hufflepuffs would go there soon for after party snacks," Peter said, starting to laugh again. "Gave the house-elves Bulbadox power and convinced them to sprinkle it only on the food they would eventually give to the Hufflepuffs—told them some rubbish about how it would enhance the flavor. It's more intense when ingested as opposed to just getting onto the skin."

An image of a house full of Hufflepuffs covered in red boils popped into James' mind. He chuckled a bit, but thought it was a little much.

"Only a few made it to dinner last night, mostly older students who had known how to charm the boils away," Sirius said, snickering.

Peter was now wiping tears from his eyes. "The queue outside of this room for the salve was as long as the corridor when we came to visit after dinner. And most of them stayed holed up today as well. We snuck down to their common room under the cloak this morning to take a look—"

"Disgusting," Sirius spat, shaking his head. "Pulsing boils everywhere on nearly all the students. The ones with the worst cases were just roaming about, unable to sit down."

James grimaced but couldn't help laughing at _that_. "But you decided to punish the entire house for Smith's and Plies' antics?"

Sirius shrugged innocently. "Seemed like a good idea at the time."

James looked expectantly at Remus, who would have disagreed with such a prank, but he was trying not to laugh and only shrugged.

"You're getting too soft, Prongs," Sirius said disappointingly. "Where are your priorities?"

_Good question_, James thought, because even then, his mind had strayed to Delilah and whether he was going to bother trying to fix things. _God, I'm pathetic._

"I'm more concerned with how I'm going to get back at Towler for that rogue Bludger," James lied, grinning stupidly as the firewhiskey began to take hold of his fatigued body.

Sirius beamed and patted him on the shoulder. "There's my boy."

* * *

The freezing rain and hail had finally departed, only to bring back the snow, but Isabella still smiled as she plopped into an armchair in front of the fire in the common room Thursday afternoon. Her birthday was only a day away, and she couldn't help but feel that giddy excitement over the coming day meant especially for her. A day where she could eat, drink, and do whatever she pleased—to an extent, at least. If she truly could do what she wanted, she would skip Apparition lessons Saturday morning and visit her father, bringing Lily and Keira with her and sending for Jasmine and Lana to spend the day in London.

Speaking of Lily and Keira, Isabella glanced around the common room for them, though knowing she wouldn't find them or see them until dinner. This was becoming a recurrence for Isabella, spending the afternoon alone while they spent time with their respective beaus. Jane had always been off in her own world, and Lily's absence had been frequent since before Christmas, but Keira was just starting to spend more and more alone time with Remus. Not that Isabella didn't enjoy having some time to herself, but the fact they were usually with their significant others only made her lack of one more obvious.

Isabella hated it, when her feelings got the best of her, making her wish for a boyfriend, as if it would somehow validate her. But it was hard not to think about it when even Keira was now returning to the common room pink-cheeked and with a uniform messier than when she had left.

Or after Isabella received an early birthday card from Garret this morning at breakfast. The message was short and sweet, but she couldn't help thinking about how she had spent her last birthday—in his arms for two very hot and frenzied hours after he snuck onto the Morgana grounds and stole her away from the surprise birthday party her roommates had thrown. A rush of tingling warmth surged through her as she remembered the weight of his half-naked body pressed against her in the dim light of a broom closet.

Or after realizing a few days ago that Sirius was purposely avoiding her. Isabella had been resolved in trying to move on and be just friends with him after their spat in the library last week; she had been making a point to cheerfully greet him whenever she saw him, but he had been paying her no mind, and was even sitting away from her in Arithmancy now. Isabella would not have been so bothered by Sirius' sudden change in demeanor if she had not heard through the rumor mill that he had indeed asked Thalia to accompany him to Hogsmeade in a couple of weeks. It had been like a punch to the gut.

Isabella shook her head as she retrieved parchment and a quill from her bag, determined to get her Herbology essay done before the weekend. She didn't have any plans yet, though the girls kept insisting on throwing her a party. She wasn't particularly keen on a party for two main reasons: she didn't know too many people outside of her house, over even outside her year within Gryffindor house, and didn't want a party to come off as a desperate attempt for the new girl to make friends. Secondly, and perhaps more importantly, she didn't want Adam to know it was her birthday, for she feared he would try to do something special—and public—for her.

A shudder went through her as she thought about her impending date with Adam in a couple of weeks. She had convinced herself she was done trying to prove anything to Sirius, but she just couldn't break the date because that would let Sirius know that he was right, and she couldn't let him have the last word, so to speak, after how she had left him hanging in the library. Isabella knew she was being childish, but she didn't care. Sirius was acting like a petulant little boy; she could act just as juvenile.

Isabella was plowing her way through her essay, her mind still helplessly wandering to Sirius every now and then, when Lily unceremoniously plopped down in an armchair beside hers.

"Hey," Lily said a little flatly.

"Hi," Isabella greeted. "What are you doing here? I didn't expect to see you until dinner."

Lily shrugged as she rummaged through her bag. "I was in the library with Elias. He said he had some things he needed to get done in his room before dinner."

Isabella didn't miss the tightness in her voice. She watched carefully as Lily opened her planner and listlessly perused next week's schedule for her due assignments.

"Everything okay?"

Lily chewed her lip for a moment before shutting her planner and turning to look at Isabella.

"I'm sick of it," she nearly whispered, glancing around to make sure nearby students couldn't hear her. "This whole _love_ thing. I mean, nothing has happened since then, and it's starting to bother me more that I thought it would."

Isabella nodded. "Well, are you sure of your own feelings? I disagree with Keira on this one; I think you should talk to him. Or just tell him that you love him, if you do. One of you has to say it first; I know we girls have this pride thing about having the guy say it first, but at this rate, you're going to end up starting a fight or, worse, breaking up with him and him having no idea as to why you're so upset."

Lily sighed, giving Isabella the look that she realized Isabella was right but that actually following through seemed like the most unappealing thing ever.

"Or the next the time you're _alone_, get lost in the feeling and blurt it out," Isabella said quietly with a sly smile. "Boys can easily forget when _they_ blurt it out, but not when girls do."

"Hmm, maybe I should," she muttered, though looking serious. "I might just have to do that."

"You act like it's the most horrible thing ever," Isabella said, laughing a little. "I wish I had a boy lavishing some physical attention on me."

"I am sure Adam would love nothing more than to comply with such a request," Lily said, smirking.

"Shut it," Isabella said sternly, but through a smile. "And by the way, I have given it thought, but I'm not that desperate yet."

"Desperate for what?"

Isabella and Lily looked around to see Keira joining them, but she wasn't alone. Remus, James, and Peter were following close behind her, and Isabella knew immediately something was up, as it always was when the boys approached them as a group.

"Nothing," Isabella said, throwing a 'drop it' look at Keira as she sat down on the sofa across from them.

"So, Isabella," James said, and there was something jovial about his tone that she didn't like. At the very least, she was pleased to see him somewhat cheery after last weekend's Quidditch debacle and the blow he took to the head.

"Yes, James?"

"We hear it's your birthday on Saturday."

"Uh," Isabella said, giving Keira another look. She only smiled and looked away. "Yeah, it is."

"So let us throw you a party," James said, his eyes hopeful. She found it hard to resist his charming grin as he placed his hands in his pockets and leaned casually against Keira's sofa.

"Why would you want to throw _me_ a party?"

James shrugged. "Why do we need a reason to throw a party for a dear friend?"

"'A dear friend?' Hmm," Isabella chuckled; Lily scoffed under her breath. "I think you just want an excuse to throw a party since you couldn't have one after the Quidditch game."

"Well, I was slightly incapacitated at the time."

"Ah, I told you that she would see right through you, Prongs," Remus said, laughing a little himself.

"I don't think anyone would mind if you threw a party for no reason," Isabella said. She wondered if Sirius was involved in this plan. "And I appreciate the gesture, but I would rather not have so much attention on me."

James gave her puppy dog eyes, and Isabella vaguely speculated why Lily constantly rebuffed him. "Will you at least let us regale you with a toast Saturday night?"

Isabella smiled. "Sure," she said, shrugging.

"Great," James said, clapping his hands. He then looked at Remus and Peter, and they nodded before he looked back to them. "See you later."

Isabella noticed Remus smile at Keira before turning away. Peter, however, stayed behind.

"You coming, Peter?" James asked.

"Yeah, in a minute," he said, shifting a little.

James studied him for a moment before shrugging. "We'll be upstairs."

Peter turned back to the girls, looking like he would rather be anywhere else.

"What's up, Pete?" Keira asked.

"Uh…well, my mum is getting married over Easter hols," Peter said, not looking at any of them. "And she's trying to involve me in the planning. She thought it would be _fun_ for me to choose the cake."

"You don't like cake?" Lily asked, a bit skeptically.

"Oh, I do," Peter said eagerly; Isabella couldn't help but glance at his pudgy midsection. "I like it all, but I'm a bloke, and I don't know anything apart from chocolate and vanilla. So…would you mind giving me some suggestions?" he asked, looking completely helpless.

Keira spoke up first. "Spice cake is my favorite, especially if it has a lot of cinnamon."

Peter nodded before looking to Isabella.

"Red velvet for me," Isabella said, thinking that it had been a long time since she last had it. She then noticed the other three giving her questioning looks. "I guess it would be difficult for you to get it here. It's more of an American thing. It's a rich chocolate cake, but the cake is dyed to give it a blood red color. I think the red is supposed to symbolize something, but all I know is that it tastes good."

"I like chocolate, too," Lily said, looking back to Peter. "But especially dark chocolate with fresh fruit in the filling—raspberries and strawberries, you know."

"Great. Thanks ladies," Peter said before hastily turning away and heading off to the door leading to the boys' dormitories.

"That was odd," Lily said as she grabbed her planner again.

"Definitely. Now tell me," Keira said, looking at Isabella, "what are you not desperate enough to do yet?"

Isabella wanted to frown for Keira's sneaky attempt to get the boys to throw a party, but she couldn't help smiling at Keira's inquisitive expression. "You're so annoying sometimes."

Keira grinned. "I know."

* * *

Isabella smiled as she grabbed her overnight bag and stuffed her dressing gown and school robes inside. She then reached under her bed and grabbed the large box that had been delivered this morning, carrying the gifts she had ordered from Guinevere's Lair, a lingerie shop in Diagon Alley.

Inside were two sets of matching silk lace camisoles and panties, one royal blue, the other a pale gold. In a smaller box were bottles of French-made lotion, soap, and perfume, honeysuckle-scented, also from the shop and much more expensive then necessary. She didn't care though. If her father asked, she would tell him she spent her birthday money on fancy chocolate.

"Got everything?" Lily asked from her bed.

Isabella picked the royal blue set and carefully placed it and her toiletries inside the bag as well. It was Friday evening, _finally_, and Lily was graciously giving up her allotted time for the Prefects' bathroom to let Isabella enjoy a good soak. Sirius' stupid birthday party had thwarted her last attempt.

"Yep, I'm ready," Isabella said, slinging the bag over her shoulder.

"Good," said Lily sitting up and setting her magazine aside. "Okay, so the Prefect's bathroom is on the fifth floor; count four doors to the left of that statue of Boris the Bewildered. The password is 'scrubbing bubbles;' if you give the password and the door doesn't open, that means someone is in there. My time is 8:30 to 10 PM; I don't think anyone else is scheduled after me, but I would leave early just in case, so the next Prefect or Quiddtich Captain doesn't question why you're using it."

"Noted," Isabella said with a nod. "And thanks again, Lily. I really appreciate it."

"Stop thanking me," Lily said, waving her hand. "I don't really take advantage of it as much as I should. Someone should get to enjoy it."

"What are you doing tonight?"

"I might take you up on your advice," Lily said, grabbing her brush from her bedside table and running it slowly through her hair. "I'm going to talk to Elias."

"Good," Isabella said with a sincere smile. "Let me know how it goes."

"Of course. If I'm back when you return, we'll have an early birthday drink," she said, grinning. "Now go, enjoy yourself. See you later."

"Good luck."

Isabella made her way out the dormitory, down the stairs, and into the common room. She thought her carrying an overnight bag would look suspicious, but no one paid her any mind. She glanced around the room and saw no sign of Sirius or his friends. She wondered what they were up to.

Isabella reached the fifth floor without much incidence. Curfew for the younger students had passed, so she didn't run into many people. She made it to the fourth door and glanced around. The corridor was clear.

"Scrubbing bubbles," she whispered at the door. Isabella was surprised when it gave no snarky remark in return and instead opened in silence.

She took a couple of steps inside but the magnitude of the room stopped her in her tracks. The door closed softly behind her and locked with a click as she gazed around the room.

The white marble of the floor, walls, and tub sparkled under the dim candlelight from the chandelier in the center of the room. The soft light was both slightly eerie and oddly romantic.

Her eyes then fell on the tub, and she sighed in anticipation. She slipped off her shoes and walked towards the tub, eyeing the numerous jeweled faucets. She turned on one with an amber jewel; steaming water with bright white foam and bubbles came pouring out the faucet.

"Vanilla," Isabella said after inhaling deeply. "Good enough for me."

She undressed as the tub filled, which was surprisingly fast.

"_Finite_," she said, pointing her wand at the tap. She then removed her bra and panties and placed them upon her folded shirt and skirt. The marble floor was cold beneath her feet; being naked in such a large open space unsettled her slightly.

Without pretense, she took a running start towards the diving board and cannonballed into the water with an echoing yell. She surfaced after a few seconds, looking around and giggling. The mermaid in the only portrait on the wall gave her an indignant look before turning over on her rock and hiding her face with her hair.

Isabella rolled her eyes and swam a few laps. It was weird swimming in warm water, but the tension in her shoulders, neck, and lower back released immediately. After most of her energy was gone, she waded over to the side and sat on the bench that ran around the perimeter of the tub. The water almost reached her chin while sitting. She settled a little lower and rested her head against the edge.

She tried to clear her mind, but it was nearly impossible. Despite her best efforts, her mind kept wandering back to Sirius. She could despise his guts, but he was too attractive to completely forget.

_Wouldn't it be nice if he were here with you_? the traitorous part of her mind asked. Isabella bristled, but her hands responded involuntarily—running up her thighs, around her hips, up her stomach, and across her chest, reveling in the pure femininity of it all. She ran them roughly over her face, trying to get a grip, but his face and stupid smirk wouldn't leave her mind.

With a sigh of frustration, Isabella let her hands fall between her thighs, touching herself in the way she wished Sirius would. She felt his lips on her neck while his hands moved slowly but thoroughly beneath the water. She imagined them having a rough quality and knew he would be the type to tease her until she was begging him to finish. With a gasp, she brought herself to orgasm faster than she had anticipated, probably due to the fact that she hadn't done so in quite some time.

Now fully relaxed, she rested her head back on the edge and closed her eyes, an easy smile at her lips as her inner thighs throbbed with a dull ache…

"Wake up, wake up! Get out of the tub!"

Isabella's eyes flew open, but she knew better than to freak out. She looked around and glared at her screaming watch; she had set it before coming down just in case she nodded off.

"Shut it; I'm up," she muttered, grabbing her wand and with a simple '_Finite_,' the watch fell silent.

She turned back and took in a deep breath, not ready to leave but feeling extremely relaxed nonetheless. The water was still warm and the foam still thick.

"I love magic," she sighed as she dipped her nearly dry hair one last time.

Grabbing her wand again, she summoned a couple of towels. They landed neatly near the rail and small steps leading out the tub. She grabbed one as she climbed out and wrapped it around her hair. She then used to other to pat herself mostly dry before using her new toiletries. The lotion felt like silk on her skin.

After drying her hair and pulling it into a loose ponytail, she put on her camisole and panties, admiring how light they were on her skin. She knew it was silly to wear something so scanty to bed when she was sleeping alone, but such indulgence was warranted every once in a while.

She looked at herself in the wide mirror on the other wall that stretched from the floor to the ceiling. She felt slightly exposed again, but she stared at herself for a few silent minutes.

In just a few short hours, at 3:42 AM to be exact, she would be of age. She didn't feel like an adult; even standing in such adult sleeping clothes, she felt a little ridiculous. Though if she were honest, the color looked great on her skin. She would have to thank Lily for suggesting it.

Her mind strayed to her mother, and Isabella wondered how this night would be different if Estelle were still alive. She would be back at Morgana, in her dormitory, perhaps, as she gossiped and sipped on champagne with her friends. Garret and his friends would probably have sneaked over to celebrate with them.

She would wake up tomorrow morning to a pile of presents on her bed, including the charm bracelet from her mother—the bracelet that was now hidden in the drawer of her bedside table. Her father had sent it this morning with a note saying, in so many words, that it was high time she wore it on a regular basis. Isabella felt guilty as she placed it in the drawer; she feared that wearing a constant reminder of her mother would depress her more than strengthen her right now. She knew that shouldn't be an issue considering how much time has passed, but she couldn't help it.

With a heavy sigh, she wrapped her dressing gown around her and pulled on her clean school robes over it, making sure they were tied as tightly as possible. She stowed her school clothes and toiletries away, knowing she needed to leave now. As she reached the door, the tub began to drain on its own. She smiled absently, pulled the door open barely an inch, and peered outside. The corridor was empty; she stepped out and closed the door tightly behind her.

It was 9:50, past 9:30 curfew for sixth and seventh years. Luckily, she knew of a shortcut to the seventh floor, and in five minutes, she was climbing through the portrait hole. The common room was still packed with students. A couple of the seventh years boys, Miles and Oscar, gave her an odd look from their armchairs near the bulletin board, but she only smiled at them before disappearing through the door to the dormitories.

She was not too surprised to see the room empty; it was actually welcoming. The long soak in the warm water had sufficiently drained her, and a long night of sleep sounded like heaven right now. She went to the bathroom to quickly brush her teeth, undressed to her undergarments, extinguished the lamps with her wand, got into bed, and closed her hangings around her.

The sheets felt cool against her mostly bare and still warm skin; it was refreshing. With thoughts of her mother still on her mind, she lied back against the pillows. She was asleep almost as soon as she closed her eyes.

But it wasn't a peaceful sleep.

She returned to her home in London for Easter break to find it empty, cold, and decrepit. The furniture was rotting as if it had been there for hundreds of years; the wallpaper was peeling, revealing termite-eaten walls; everything was covered in a thick inch of dust. An unknown force drew her to backyard, where she found her mother's lifeless body splayed near the dead rosebushes; the Dark Mark burned into several places on her skin. She fell to her knees sobbing before an eerie green glow caught her attention. She glanced up and saw the Dark Mark glittering ominously above them. She opened her mouth to scream, but no sound came, and the scene washed away.

She was now running down an unknown corridor, constantly looking back at the dark masked figures chasing her. The air was freezing around her, and each spastic inhale felt like knives in her chest. She was screaming for her father, for help of any kind, but she had not idea where she was, and no one was coming. Looking back again, she saw her captors were closing in on her. She tried to speed up, but she tripped over a large amber jewel and tumbled to a stop, landing on her back and unable to move. The figures closed around her, laughing maniacally and calling her a blood-traitor. The nearest one crouched down to cover her mouth to keep her from screaming while another pulled a knife as long as a broomstick handle from his robes. Isabella's muffled screams only increased their laughter as she thrashed around and struggled to breathe.

She tried to force herself awake, but she still felt suffocated. With severe effort, she opened her eyes and saw someone standing inside her bed curtains with a hand covering her mouth and a lit wand held aloft.

She continued to struggle, tried to scream, to force whoever's arm away, but he held strong. Her eyes finally adjusted, eventually seeing Sirius standing over her, his own eyes anxious.

"Calm down, it's only me," he said quietly in a rush.

Isabella felt like kicking him, but she settled anyways, her breaths still coming in short spasms.

"Promise me you won't scream when I remove my hand."

She glared at him but nodded, and he promptly removed his hand from her mouth. Only then did she think to bite down on it.

"What are you doing here?" Isabella whispered fiercely, raising up a little. She was still a little shaken from her nightmares.

Sirius remained quiet. He wasn't looking at her. His eyes had trailed down her body, now free of the covers she had kicked away as she thrashed about while sleeping. She blushed and hastily grabbed for the sheet, covering herself with it as she sat up.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" she demanded again, pushing him hard in the chest.

His eyes snapped up to look at her; he swallowed visibly. "I need to talk to you."

"Now? _Now_?" she said incredulously. "What could possibly be so important to compel you to sneak up here in the middle of the night and scare the shit out of me? And just how _did_ you get up here?"

"That doesn't matter now; just meet me downstairs in five minutes."

Isabella didn't like the urgency and commanding nature of his voice. Based on the fact that he was still in his school clothes, save for his robes and tie, she surmised that he hadn't slept at all tonight; she was intrigued as to what brought him up here so late, but she was angry at him for his presumption.

"Why should I do anything you ask of me?" she asked scathingly.

"I know I've been a total prick lately, and you owe me nothing, but just meet me downstairs and hear me out," he said, and rather earnestly, Isabella noted.

An internal conflict was raging within her now. One side, the side thinking back to her bath, was urging her to go, but the other side, the one that remembered how she felt after his birthday and their argument in the library, insisted that she stay.

"So you'll come?"

Isabella looked at him, still feeling confused. After another silent moment, she nodded. "Okay."

Sirius exhaled and smiled. "Brilliant. Downstairs, five minutes. Wear something warm."

"But how did—"

Sirius disappeared through her bed curtains before she could finish. She listened for the door to open and close, but no sound came.

_Lily is going to kill me_, she thought. "And wear something warm?" she muttered disdainfully. _What for_? She glanced at her clock; it was 3:15 AM.

Still questioning the last five and extremely bizarre minutes, she got out of bed and crept to her armoire. She glanced around at her roommates' beds. They all had their curtains closed, and she sent up a silent thankful prayer for them remaining asleep. She couldn't imagine the rage Lily would fly into if she knew a boy, especially Sirius, had snuck into their room.

Isabella pulled out a bra, sweatshirt, and a pair of jeans and dressed quickly. Her ponytail had fallen out during her sleep, so she grabbed her brush and pulled it through her hair a few times before she realized how silly she was being. She all but threw the brush back on the shelf and slammed the armoire doors shut in irritation.

She went back to her bed, grabbed her wand, and headed out the room, giving her roommates one last look; they were fast asleep. The corridors and stairwell were empty, dark, and uncomfortably quiet. She reached the common room and saw Sirius waiting for her by the portrait hole. He grinned when he saw her.

"I was afraid you changed you mind."

"I still have time," she said, trying to keep her voice flat and free of any interest. "Now what do you want?"

"Can't tell you here; just come with me."

"Where?"

"Just follow me."

"Sirius, don't test me right now."

He held up his hands placatingly. "Sorry. I don't mean to be so demanding. Just—will you please come with me? I promise you'll enjoy it."

The internal struggle was still raging; Isabella did not want to give in. But whom was she kidding? She desperately wanted to know what he was up to.

"Isabella…you wouldn't have come this far if you weren't going to come along."

He was right, and he knew it, if his current smirk indicated anything.

"Alright!" she said with exasperation, throwing up her arms.

He grinned again and tried to grab her hand. "Let's go."

"I don't think so," she said snatching her hand away. "Lead the way."

He shrugged and headed out the portrait hole, Isabella close behind him. Once they were outside, Sirius pulled out the same invisibility cloak and tattered map from the last time they had snuck off together.

"I solemnly swear I am up to no good," he muttered as he tapped the parchment with his wand; Isabella bristled beside him. "All clear for now. Filch is in his quarters with Mrs. Norris, and Peeves is bouncing around in the kitchens. No need for this." He was holding up the cloak.

_Thank goodness_, Isabella thought, not knowing if she could keep her cool if forced to be so close to him.

He began to walk towards the main staircase, a few steps ahead of her. Isabella's interest was mounting with each step, and she wondered why he wasn't speaking. She did notice that his hands were balled in his pockets; apparently, he was just as nervous as she was.

They stopped every so often so that Sirius could check the map; after ten minutes of silent walking, she finally realized where they were headed. She smiled despite herself.

They climbed up the winding staircase and came to a halt in front of the door when they reached the top. Sirius turned to her with an anxious smile, and Isabella raised her eyebrows.

"I'm being sentimental," he said, shrugging.

Isabella rolled her eyes. "So why are we here _now_? You could have brought me here at a more fitting hour."

"Yeah, but I wanted to ensure I was the first."

"The first what?"

Sirius' ever-present smirk melted into the first genuine smile Isabella had seen on him in a long time. She suddenly became inexplicably tense.

"I wanted to be the first to wish you a happy birthday."

He then turned to the door and pushed it open. He walked through, and Isabella followed tentatively behind him. When she stepped out onto the Astronomy Tower, her breath caught in her throat.

A soft gold glow lit the space, emanating from gold fairies encased within clear orbs hovering above and reflecting vividly off the fallen snow. It was only slightly chilly, probably due to some invisible barrier, Isabella thought, seeing as how the falling snow was bouncing off something unseen some 10 feet above them. A path cleared in the snow on the ground led to a small table in the center of the tower, flanked by two chairs and covered in a crimson cloth, atop which sat a covered silver platter. A small vase with white tulips adorned the table as well.

It all looked so simple and effortless, but still so very stunning. Isabella wanted to let herself get swept up in whatever this meant, but her cautious side, still putting up a good fight, kept her feet firmly on the ground. She looked questioningly at Sirius; he was watching her closely.

"Happy birthday," he said softly.

"I—it's lovely," Isabella breathed. "But I don't understand."

"Let's not talk about that yet," he said, gesturing to the table. "Open your gift first."

Isabella gave him an incensed look but walked towards the table anyways. She sat down in a chair and waited for him to do the same. Sirius remained standing, however, smiling down at her. Isabella thought it looked a little smug.

"Look, I am sick of the games," Isabella said, before she could stop herself. "I feel like this is some elaborate joke; I don't know why you keep aggravating me, and I know a lot of it is of my own doing, letting you drag me out here in spite of my best—is that red velvet?"

Sirius had lifted the platter's lid during her mini rant, and her eyes fell on a blood red cupcake the size of a dinner plate, covered in white frosting with a single gold candle in the center, already lit. A fork rested in front of it. She only stared at it as he sat down and folded his hands before him on the table; the smirk had returned.

"Would you like me to sing to you?"

"I bet you're hoping I say 'no.'"

He chuckled. "True, but if you really want me to, I will."

"I'll spare you the embarrassment."

"Thanks," he said. "So we'll skip the song and move onto the next step. Make a wish."

Isabella eyed him warily before closing her eyes. She thought about the things she really wanted—the end of this war, for her father to make it through safely, for the safety of her mother's family who had disappeared. But then she began thinking selfishly; it was her birthday after all.

_I just want true companionship; I want to feel what I felt for Garret again,_ she thought. _Whether it's for Sirius…or someone else_.

She opened her eyes; Sirius had been watching her again. With a small smile, she blew out the candle.

"So what now?" she asked.

"Uh, I think you're supposed to eat some," he said, unable to hide the amusement in his voice.

She frowned at him as she picked up the fork. "I would ask how you found out that red velvet is my favorite, but I assume you sent Peter to do your dirty work. So I'll ask how and where you got it instead."

"Peter asking you girls about cake for his mum's wedding was the true intention. I was just able to use the information, too," he said, looking very impressed with himself. "And I did have to jump through a few hoops to get it in time from the States, but it was worth it, seeing how it lit up your face. I thought it would be a nice reminder of home, and it looks as if I was right."

"I guess I should be flattered," Isabella said, taking a small bite of the cake. It melted in her mouth, and she reveled in the rich chocolaty cake and the sweet tang of the cream cheese frosting. She had to hand it to Sirius; she was certainly impressed and very happy.

"Are you?"

"I am," she said quietly after swallowing another bite. "It's delicious."

They sat in silence for a few minutes while Isabella ate more of her birthday cake. She thought she might look like a pig but didn't care. She hadn't had red velvet cake in a long time; she was going to enjoy it.

When she had nearly had her fill, she grabbed another piece with the fork and lifted it towards him. "Want to try?"

"I really don't care for sweets," he said with a slight shake of his head.

"Oh come on, after all you had to do to get it here, you could at least give it a taste."

Sirius rolled his eyes but leaned forward and opened his mouth; Isabella fed him the piece, feeling a little impish. He winked as he set back and chewed thoroughly.

"It's not so bad," he finally said. "The cream cheese kind of threw me off though."

"You get used to it, and before you know it, you wonder how you had ever enjoyed anything else," Isabella said, placing the fork back on the platter. She then looked directly at him. "Now, I've had my gift…so you want to tell me what this means?"

Sirius suddenly looked slightly nervous again. He fidgeted with his shirt collar before looking back at her. "It's my way of apologizing."

"For…?"

"For the way I've been acting since…well, since the day we met, really," he explained. "I don't want to make excuses, but between my personal issues with my family, this war, and—I feel like I took part of it out on you; I was an arsehole. And you were part of my frustration, believe it or not. I don't like when girls get under my skin."

"I swear that was not my intention," she said, trying to be serious but unable to keep all of the self-satisfaction out of her voice.

Sirius' eyes narrowed a little but he continued. "And I was acting in a way that I knew I couldn't act anymore, that I knew was childish, that I knew I was better than. I'm still learning, but I figured I could first apologize for the one thing that was nagging me the most."

Isabella was a little taken aback by how open he was being, but she was still a little disappointed. He was apologizing for being an ass; he had said nothing of what she really wanted to hear. Perhaps he was feeling hesitant; she would have to push him a little.

"And what else does it mean?"

"You're really going to make me work for it, aren't you?"

Isabella remained quiet but nodded.

"You asked me about a week ago if your feelings were mutual." He leaned forward again, all traces of amusement gone from his face. "I have to be honest: I think they are…I know they are."

Isabella's heart took flight, and she smiled at his eager expression, but she reigned in the part of her that wanted to fling herself across the table and into his arms.

"I don't know what to say…I have to admit that from what I've heard about you and what I have experienced myself, this—you laying everything out in the open doesn't seem consistent."

"It's not," he quickly acknowledged. "But I realized that I can't keep pushing you away because it would drive me crazy to see you with someone else."

Isabella frowned. "So this is about having possession over me?"

"That's not what I meant," he said a bit forcefully, holding his hands up in defense. "I mean…look, I admit that I am selfish and arrogant by nature, and I had to wrestle with that to make it this far. I had originally planned to wake you up at midnight, you know, for it to mark the start of your day, but…I got nervous; James had to box my ears a bit and talk some sense into me."

"Well, your hesitancy put you more on the mark," Isabella said, glancing at his watch. "I was born two minutes ago. But if James had to 'box your ears and talk some sense' to convince you to come here—"

"I am here on my own accord, Isabella," Sirius interrupted, his eyes flashing a little. "I know you have your doubts, but I don't see why we can't at least try if there is still a mutual attraction."

Isabella swallowed hard. He was right; they could _try_. They didn't have to jump into something particularly serious just yet. Besides, this 'trying' thing could be fun.

"Okay," she said after a pause. "So where do we go from here? What does this make us?"

"Wherever and whatever you want," he said, sitting back and looking a little relieved.

"Well…why don't we take things slowly since we still have a lot to learn about each other? Let's not confuse things with labels just yet." She looked expectantly at him.

"Fine by me," he said genially. "Exclusively?"

She smirked. "You breaking your date with Thalia?"

"That was only a rumor," he laughed. "I have no idea who started it. You'll break yours with Adam?"

"Only if I receive a more…tempting offer," she said slyly.

He raised his eyebrows. "'A tempting offer,' huh? I have an idea, but you said you wanted to move slowly, so…"

"Fair enough." Isabella stood up suddenly, crossed the small space between them, and caught him off guard by sitting on his lap, making sure not to straddle him, which she knew would only lead to trouble.

She clasped his arms around his neck and smirked down at him. "Sirius, will you go to Hogsmeade with me?"

"Are you asking me on a date?"

"It seems I am. Why, feeling a threat to your manhood?"

He grinned. "I can assure you that a threat is the last thing my manhood is feeling right now. You could take a look for yourself, if you'd like."

"Slowly," she repeated sternly, but before she could say anything else, he kissed her.

It was deep and slightly frenzied, each one of them channeling their pent-up frustration from the past few weeks into every movement. Isabella's hands clenched in his hair, while his right wrapped around her waist and his left held roughly onto her thigh. She loved how strong his arms and hands felt around her. Another minute passed before Isabella felt light-headed and pulled away.

"My answer is 'yes,' by the way," Sirius said before kissing her again. This time, it wasn't as rushed, and Isabella, not caring when his hands had snaked under her sweatshirt and found the bare flesh of her lower back, wondered just what she had been thinking when she made that silly 'move slowly' stipulation.

When they broke apart a few minutes later, Sirius grinned up at her. "I could do this all night."

"Then why don't we?" Isabella said, her voice slightly breathless.

"Because it's 4:00, and we have Apparition in the morning," he informed her. "And you're not supposed to be all knackered on your actual birthday. Just the day after."

"I suppose you're right," she said, leaning away from him a little and fighting the urge to give into the burning desire to kiss him again. She didn't want this to turn into a competition of wits, but she knew she would have to keep her head with him, or she would be like putty in his hand.

She stood up from his lap and pulled her sweatshirt back over her hips. When she turned to look at him, he was grabbing the vase of tulips and covering the remaining cake with the lid.

"For your bedside table," he said, handing her the vase. He then tapped the covered platter, and with a muttered spell, transfigured it into a small box. "For tomorrow." But he kept it as he stood and entwined her free hand with his own. "Shall we?"

Isabella tried to keep her smile modest despite the fireworks going off in her head as they walked towards the tower door. "Don't you want to clean up? I can help."

He shook his head. "I'll take care of it tomorrow."

They headed down the stairwell and through the halls towards Gryffindor Tower. Sirius went into detail about how he had planned her little surprise, how tricky it was to convince the fairies, who are notoriously stubborn, to comply, and the sense of personal failure the house-elves in the Hogwarts kitchens had felt when they admitted to him that they didn't know what a red velvet cake was and couldn't help him.

"I felt awful," he said, chuckling. "They kept offering to find a way to help; I had to actually forbid them from helping. I didn't think it would stick since I'm not their master, but…" he trailed off with a shrug.

"And the fairies? How did you convince them?"

"I have my ways," he said furtively with a wink. "I can be quite the charmer."

"I've noticed," Isabella said dully. "I'm just amazed you could be so creative."

"You have a lot to learn about me," he said proudly. "I'm full of surprises."

_I bet_, she thought. _And I can't wait to discover every single one_. She remained quiet, though, and sneered.

They were suddenly at the snoozing Fat Lady, and only then did Isabella realize that Sirius had not once checked the map.

"She's going to kill us for waking her up," Isabella said.

"Don't worry about her," Sirius assured with a grin and turned back to the portrait. "Oi! Fat Lady!"

Isabella jumped a little, fearing his yell would attract someone and get them in trouble. She was about to question Sirius' sanity when the Fat Lady spluttered awake. She looked indignantly around before her eyes fell on Sirius. Her glare immediately softened and color rose in her cheeks.

"Ah, Sirius, out late again."

Isabella felt like gagging at her twittering voice.

"And with a lady friend this time, I see," she said when her eyes found Isabella, her voice a little harder.

Isabella tried not to roll her eyes and plastered on a fake smile.

"Afraid so," he said playfully. "Sorry for waking you up."

She looked back at Sirius and smiled. "Not at all a problem. Boys will be boys," she tittered. "But I still need the password."

"Of course," Sirius said indulgently. "Bezoar."

"Thank you, dear. Have a good night." She swung open, not bothering to look at Isabella.

"And the same to you," he said as he pulled Isabella inside.

Once she heard the portrait shut behind them, Isabella scoffed. "If I weren't sure of the limits of portrait-human relationships, I think I would be jealous."

"Ah, don't worry about her. Me and the boys had to make nice if we wanted to continue our gallivanting without her narking on us to Filch," Sirius explained. "She's just lonely, sitting in her portrait all day. A little attention goes a long way."

"Huh," Isabella muttered.

They were soon at the door to the girls' dormitories and Sirius stepped just inside it before pulling her back as she reached the first step.

"Wait," he said, turning her around. "We haven't said 'goodnight.'"

"Aren't you going to make sure I get back up alright first?"

He gave her an admonishing look. "You know I can't walk up those stairs. They will turn into a slide, and the alarm would wake up the whole castle."

Isabella frowned at him. "Then how did you get up there earlier?"

"I was able to find a way just this once since I had to get you out of there somehow," he said elusively, "but I wouldn't dream of taking advantage of it and invading your privacy." He then gently backed her into the wall next to the door and lowered his mouth to her ear. "Unless you can promise me that I would always find you in a number similar to what you had on earlier, I could certainly make it a frequent habit."

Isabella shuddered at the sound of his low voice and hot breath against her ear, immensely flattered that he had liked what he saw. "I think that would go against our established agreement of taking things day by day," she said, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Ah, then I guess we'll have to settle for this for now." He pulled up slightly and kissed her, so slowly and thoroughly, she knew it was meant to tease her. She was breathless when he broke the kiss a minute later.

"I don't mind settling," she whispered.

He laughed as he stepped back. "That makes one of us, then. Only kidding!" he added quickly when she smacked his arm.

"Thank you for the flowers and the cake," she said as she climbed the first few steps, knowing she needed to get out of his reach or she would wind up in his arms again.

He handed her the box, smirking a little as if aware of the reason for her ascent. "My pleasure. Breakfast tomorrow?"

"Of course."

"Then I'll see you in a few hours." He gave her that genuine smile again. "Goodnight Isabella."

Her heart began pounding erratically in response. "Goodnight."

She turned, climbed the stairs, and didn't stop to think until she was inside her dormitory. She placed the vase and box of cake on her bedside table before changing back into her camisole. Once she was safely behind her curtains again, she let out a tiny squeal of excitement, unable to contain it any longer.

_Unbelievable_, she thought, still completely flabbergasted at what had transpired in the last hour. She was unsure of what could trigger such a change, but she was happy for it nonetheless. However, she knew she could not fully throw herself into this quite yet; boys like Sirius didn't completely change overnight, and she had a feeling he was going to work hard to force her hand faster than she wanted to. But regardless of it all, Sirius was hers. It was an overwhelmingly satisfying thought.

Isabella couldn't imagine what her roommates would say when she told them in the morning, but she would worry about that later. Right now she had a date in her dreams with Sirius, his lips, and those wonderful hands of his.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry for the delay. This chapter gave me a number of issues despite it being nearly complete weeks ago. James and Delilah in particular were being difficult. I have a clear idea of where this relationship is heading, but this episode felt a little rushed. However, I am happy overall with the finished product.**

**Isabella and Sirius-FINALLY! But don't think their relationship will be a walk in the park. I tentatively have this story planned to go through their seventh year, with a budding sequel in mind, so I promise much more to come.**

**Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed. It is very much appreciated.  
**


	17. Touch

"Am I the only one who finds it odd that our last four pranks have all centered around revenge?"

Sirius glanced over at James as he precariously funneled undiluted Bubotuber puss into one of Adam Cohen's dragon-hide gloves. "You ask that as you fill Towler's gloves yourself?"

James shrugged, not caring about the obvious irony.

"Besides, I think I am quite justified in such a fiendish deed," Sirius said with a slightly evil grin. He finished filling the fingers of the right glove, set it aside, and picked up the left one.

James turned around with an exaggerated huff and a hand on his hip. "Excuse me, I think breaking my face counts for something."

Sirius chuckled. "Ah, yes I apologize for such a glaring oversight. I know how lost you would be without your smashing good looks."

"Hey," James said petulantly, "I have other things going for me, but I can't exactly go around with my todger and bollocks hanging out, can I?"

"Oh, you could, but I think you'd rather keep your reputation of being well-endowed." He then felt a wad of something hit his bum. Startled, he looked around and saw a glob of Bubotuber puss slowly oozing down his leg. "Wanker," Sirius muttered, glaring at James who had quickly turned back around laughing. "You're lucky I'm wearing trousers."

They were in Greenhouse Four, home of most of the sixth years' Herbology classes this year. It was Friday, during their break between lunch and Potions. Professor Sprout was currently teaching in Greenhouse One. The pouring sleet ensured that their shadows weren't seen roaming about the stuffy room.

It might have been the Marauders' fourth prank but it was Sirius' seventh of the week, if he was counting correctly. Of course, there was the Bulbadox powder for the Hufflepuffs. On Tuesday, Michael Avery's broomstick had sprouted a thousand tiny splinters at a most unfortunate time during Slytherin Quidditch practice after he had made a degrading comment about Peter's father during a lesson about the particularly difficult tracking charm; he was still in the Hospital Wing hoping they would fall out on their own after refusing to let Pomfrey take them out manually. And James had finally gotten over his righteousness and was allowing himself to get back at Casey Towler for that wayward Bludger.

And then there was Sirius' personal vendetta against Adam Cohen. Sirius had barely had time to pat himself on the back for taking a leap of faith with Isabella and convincing her to give him a chance before _fucking_ Cohen had nearly ruined it all.

Isabella had kept her promise to break her Hogsmeade date with Adam and decided to do it discreetly to prevent him from making a scene and save him from embarrassment. But that small bit of courtesy had not compelled him to do the same.

It hadn't been hard for Adam to figure out why she had cancelled on him. Nearly the whole school had taken a collective gasp when Sirius and Isabella walked into the Great Hall for breakfast hand-in-hand the morning of her birthday. After she pulled Adam aside Sunday evening after dinner, he had griped to Dorcas that Isabella was nothing but American trash who had set her sights on screwing as many boys as she could and that Sirius had finally fallen for her deceitful beguiling charms.

Adam had even gone on to say that Sirius had been more or less forced to settle with her since he had already slept his way through every girl in Hogwarts that would have him. Of course, it had been spread throughout most of the school by the time they walked into Transfiguration Monday morning.

Sirius could only laugh at the whole thing. He didn't give a centaur's balls about what anyone other than his friends thought about him. The school could believe that he had shagged every female from Professor McGonagall to Moaning Myrtle for all he cared, but now that he was seeing Isabella, he realized that her opinion of him mattered too. And she had been devastated by the rumors.

Through their limited interactions over the past few months, Sirius had learned that Isabella was sensitive about what people thought of her—her being the new girl, and a foreigner no less. No one seemed to care that her mother's family had been one of the more revered pureblood families of Britain before they had all disappeared.

As soon as the nasty allegations had found their way to her, she wouldn't as much as stand within a meter of Sirius with others around, much less hold his hand or indulge him with a goodnight kiss on the cheek. She had been trying to make a point for everyone to see that getting Sirius into her bed had been nowhere near her intentions and that she was not going to fall for whatever tricks he had in mind to get her into his either.

Sirius had toyed with the idea of publically humiliating Adam with some wily plan, but he knew it would have only given Adam more attention, which is what the tosser ultimately wanted. Also, he didn't think Isabella would be the type to appreciate someone suffering even if it was done to defend her honor. So, Sirius had decided to drive Adam crazy with a few small—and admittedly petty—inconveniences.

On Monday night, Sirius had snuck into the Ravenclaw sixth year dormitories and replaced Adam's soap and shampoo with a concoction that made all his hair fall out.

"Yes, and it was _all_ his hair," Andy had confirmed to a laughing group of people as they all watched Adam's newly bald head whip past the Great Hall entrance Tuesday morning as he ran to the Hospital Wing. Andy had felt no sympathy for his brother, believing that he was getting his comeuppance for being so malicious towards Isabella.

Sirius then slipped a love potion they had bought months ago into Adam's pumpkin juice Wednesday morning at breakfast while hidden under James' invisibility cloak. Adam had spent the next day and a half, much to everyone's amusement, fawning over Dorna Upton and begging her to be his one and only. Sirius had been surprised that even the most—without question—repugnant girl in Hogwarts had standards that Adam couldn't meet.

On Thursday came two of the Marauders' simple but effective favorites: an enhanced itching powder that remained on the skin for a guaranteed 24 hours no matter how hard you tried to scrub it off—that was sprinkled onto Adam's bed sheets—and a bewitched suit of armor that followed Adam throughout the castle and hurled insults at him or attempted to kick and punch him every time he turned his back. Only when McGonagall tired of it repeatedly trying to enter her classroom and continue its assigned duty did the incantation end.

And now here he was on Friday, filling the last finger of Adam's left glove with Bubotuber puss, which had been James' idea. Not many students left their supplies in the greenhouses between classes, but fortunately for Sirius and James, Cohen and Towler were among those trusting fools who did. And they would get an immediate payoff—the sixth years had begun working with the more complex and dangerous features of the Venomous Tantacula plants they had originally learned about in second year.

Sirius knew his pranks were quite juvenile considering the complexity of their previous productions and all the resources he had available at his disposable—Peter's truly devious mind, Remus' uncanny knack for quickly learning charms and how to alter them to suit their needs, and James' sheer audacity—but he had found solace knowing that, according to Andy last night, Adam was now afraid of just getting out of bed in the morning.

He also knew that this would have to be the last of his revenge. Although there was no proof connecting them, he and his friends had been suspected of creating all of the madness seen since Hufflepuff's Quidditch after party—it had their signature all over it. It would only be a matter of time before any of them slipped.

Besides, Sirius realized that he needed to be channeling all of his anger over Adam and the resulting frenzied energy into finding a way to convince Isabella that shagging her, while definitely appealing and on his radar to happen in the near future, had not been the reason behind his pursuit of her…and, of course, to get her kissing him the way she had the early morning of her birthday again.

"Well, I'm done," Sirius said, chucking Adam's gloves back in his labeled bin before removing his own. He stuffed them in his robes and turned to James. "You?"

"Good to go."

The Hufflepuff bins caught Sirius' eye, and he bent down to scan them. "You want to load Smith's?"

James grunted unintelligibly as he stowed his gloves away as well.

"Ah bugger," Sirius muttered, pushing a bin back on the shelf. "They're not in there."

"I wouldn't have filled them anyways." Sirius rolled his eyes, but James only shrugged. "I'm over it."

They didn't bother casting impervious charms or shielding their faces as they stepped back into the storm. Drying charms once they were back in the castle would take less effort.

Sirius eyed his best friend with a frown as they trudged silently back towards the castle. He was annoyed but not surprised by James' lack of interest in causing any more mischief; it had pretty much been the status quo since their sixth year began.

Sirius didn't think it was Delilah that had caused the change; she wasn't one for joking around too much, but she wasn't exactly a stiff old maid either. And Sirius knew that it wasn't due to any pressure from James' parents. They had always waved off the numerous owls they received from Hogwarts about James' misbehavior with a 'boys will be boys' attitude and felt no need to punish him as long as his grades remained above 'Excellent,' which they had.

But Sirius knew that James' parents did have a little something to do with the change in his behavior; James had said so himself back in fall term during one of those countless night they had sat up restless in the common room.

"My father is right in the thick of this war. Mum worries herself sick every time he leaves the house," James had said, not caring to hide the worry in his voice. "The last thing she needs is to get an owl about me purposely provoking and dueling with some stupid Slytherin. Don't get me wrong—I'm not going to lie down and let those bastards walk all over me; I'll fight when I need to. But shit like last spring with Snape after O.W.L.s…that can't happen anymore."

Sirius had understood where James was coming from, especially regarding Clarice, but he had sneered at James' words, not thinking he would actually live them. As it were, Sirius realized only yesterday that James had not had a single detention this year. Even _Remus_ had had a detention—albeit only one and for being considerably late to Transfiguration—but it was still one more than James.

When they reached the oak front doors, James had been saying something about Delilah. The two had finally made up this past weekend, confusing Sirius, Peter, and Remus. They had been sure James and Delilah's row had been something serious if James' apathy after waking up from his Bludger-induced unconsciousness had been any indication, but James had been adamant about fixing things with her as soon as he was up again.

Sirius had tried to be supportive, but he just didn't see what James saw in Delilah. She was pretty enough, but she was boring. To be honest, Sirius still wasn't quite sure if James sincerely fancied her, or was using her in an attempt to keep Evans off his mind. Maybe it was part of James' new plan—dating an unexciting girl would keep things low-key. Or maybe Sirius was biased now because he just happened to be dating the best girl in the school—in his opinion at least.

"…and I don't know what to do for her birthday," James said as they reached the seventh floor. "Girls are so goddamn picky and expectant." He looked at Sirius helplessly.

Sirius frowned. "Sorry, I'm tapped out."

And it was true. Sirius wasn't exactly the amorous type—that whole setup for Isabella's birthday had drained his romantic surprise quota for the year. But he had done well enough. Isabella had obviously been impressed, and so had his friends when he told them the next day. James had already known about it but was amazed that Sirius had actually followed through.

Sirius stroked his chin in mock thought for a moment. "Just give her a bouquet of flowers and fuck her brains out; she won't complain."

James stared at him before laughing and shaking his head. "I think I should warn Isabella about what she has ahead of her. Your little birthday surprise might have swayed her and everyone else, but you haven't yet fooled me."

"I would love to meet the person who _could_ make a fool of you."

Sirius immediately grew nervous when he saw Isabella climbing out the portrait hole. He wondered how much she had heard.

"His girlfriend seems to be doing a fine job currently," Sirius said smoothly.

Isabella smiled absently but was staring at them wildly, compelling Sirius to look down and then at James. They had been talking too much to remember to cast drying charms and were still soaked. And on top of that, their robes were covered in muck from the knee down. Sirius looked back and saw that he and James had trailed mud tracks their entire way to the common room. Filch would have their necks if he tracked them down.

"I would ask what you two have been up to, but I don't think I want to know." Isabella was trying to suppress her smile now.

"And we don't want to tell you."

"So it all works out," Sirius added.

Isabella smirked.

"So where are you off to?" Sirius asked as nonchalantly as he could without sounding apathetic. He really did want to know but didn't want to appear as off he was trying to keep tabs on her.

She held up a letter. "To the Owlery." She then looked directly at Sirius. "And I wouldn't mind some company."

"And that's my cue to leave." James winked at Isabella. "See you in Potions." He gave the password and climbed out of sight.

They stood silent and unmoving for a few seconds, Sirius feeling a bit edgy. It was the first time they had been alone all week—if you didn't count the Fat Lady observing them curiously from above.

"I think we should do something about those robes first," Isabella finally said. She pulled out her wand, dried his uniform, and siphoned the mud away before he could reach for his own.

"Thanks." Sirius ran a hand through his now dry hair before proffering his arm. "Shall we?" he asked. He grinned when she took his hand instead.

They headed towards the Owlery, with Isabella vanishing the muddy footprints along the way until their path diverted.

"So who's the letter for?" Sirius asked in the same tone as before. He knew her letters were for either her father or someone in the States, and for some reason, her ex-boyfriend as a possible recipient came annoyingly to mind.

Isabella sighed. "My aunt Annette. I have been putting it off for a good month now. She's irritated with me."

"An aunt from your father's side?" Isabella nodded. "Why is she upset?"

"She was hoping we would visit over Christmas," Isabella explained. "She understands why my father couldn't, but didn't see why I couldn't come."

"Why didn't you?" Sirius asked, through he was glad that she hadn't left; otherwise she probably wouldn't have been at the Potters' New Year's Eve party.

"My father wasn't too keen on me traveling overseas alone, and neither was I, but I think Annette took it personally."

Sirius raised an eyebrow in question. "Seems a bit selfish to me."

A sad smile appeared at Isabella's lips. "I know, but her offense is somewhat valid. I'm the only girl among my cousins on that side, and she never had children, so she doted on me endlessly. I was her favorite." She sighed again. "I think after Jasmine and Lana, she took my leaving the hardest."

"She could have visited herself."

"That's true," Isabella conceded with a nod. "But I assume she was afraid to come considering everything that's going on here. She knows why my father is here and has been against it from the beginning."

"Doesn't seem like anyone was too supportive of him coming here."

"Right again," Isabella said. "Really, only the Chief Magical Officer—similar to your Minister—supported my dad's decision."

"And you?"

Isabella shrugged. "I am here, aren't I? I admit I wasn't originally too happy about moving, but I _am_ trying to make the most of it." She gave him a sly smile as she slipped into the Owlery just as he tried to pull her in for a kiss.

This was small talk, he knew, but it was necessary, knowing more about Isabella's family to ultimately better understand her. Building this emotional connection was important if he were to make the moves to progress the physical side of this budding relationship—and, god, did he want to progress the physical.

Sirius was trying to go about this whole thing the right way, but not thinking about Isabella in his bed had been nearly impossible after seeing her in those laughable excuses for pajamas. The images of her erect nipples straining against the thin silk fabric and her smooth thighs had been burned into his mind, causing him to wank more in the past week than he had all school year since dumping Daphne.

Sirius took a deep, steadying breath before following her into the tower. She had already found her owl and was speaking to it in a low voice as she tied the letter to its left leg.

"So what's its name?" Sirius asked when he reached her.

"_Her_ name is Amelia," Isabella said, stroking the owl's head. Amelia hooted appreciatively but was eyeing Sirius with apprehension.

"Hello, Amelia." Sirius raised a hesitant hand to stroke her feathers. He wanted to be on the good side of everyone in Isabella's life, and he guessed her owl should be included. Amelia hooted again at Sirius' touch, and he felt a bit like a ponce, trying to win over a damn owl, but it seemed to be working.

"You don't think it a bit cruel to make an owl fly all that way?" Sirius asked when Isabella finally lifted Amelia and carried her to a window. It was still pouring and extremely windy outside. "And especially in this weather?"

"She doesn't mind, or she wouldn't have come down when I called her," Isabella said, a little defensively. "Besides, she's flown to the States only twice since we've moved. I've mostly been sending her to the Owl Post Office to give my letters to an international express owl."

"Ah."

Amelia took off into the dreary weather, the wind knocking her off course for only a few seconds before she righted herself.

Isabella turned to face Sirius again. "Shall we?"

Sirius grabbed her hand and led her out of the drafty Owlery. When they reached the landing, Isabella spoke again.

"So I wonder what misfortune that poor Adam will run into today."

Sirius swallowed hard and looked out of the corner of his eye. Isabella was smiling.

"It _is_ odd, isn't it, how trouble keeps finding him?" Sirius asked, his tone of light concern matching hers. "But perfectly timed, no?"

Isabella nodded. "I admit that I think it's all well-deserved, considering all he had to say about me, and us. I would love to know who is responsible for it all."

Sirius perked up a bit. "Why?"

"To thank him properly for defending my honor so thoroughly, you know."

"And how would you do that, thank him, I mean?" Sirius smiled to himself; it seems that he had misjudged her reaction.

"Not sure. Maybe a firm handshake," she said with a glance at Sirius, "or a pat on the back, or a—"

She was cut off when Sirius, unable to hold himself back anymore, pulled her into a passageway hidden behind a tapestry. He pushed her gently against the wall and kissed her before she could utter a single word of protest.

Sirius knew he should be working more on that emotional connection to strengthen Isabella's trust in him, but she didn't seem to mind. She had immediately wrapped her arms around his neck to bring him closer and parted her lips to run her tongue across his bottom lip. He shuddered before forcing his own tongue into her mouth. He could taste orange sherbet; she had probably indulged in her secret candy stash after lunch.

Nor did she complain when one of his hands snaked into her robes and down her back to cup her bum over her skirt or when the other left her hip and ran deliberately up her stomach and chest to eventually wrap around her neck. He had never touched her there; her skin was incredibly warm and soft.

Without thinking, Sirius broke their kiss and moved his lips along her jaw and to her neck, as if drawn there. He inhaled deeply and smelled that same fresh, citrusy scent that had annoyed him months ago but was now intoxicating. Isabella was panting slightly but didn't push him away when he began to suck on a spot that elicited a hearty moan from her. He could feel her pulse racing beneath his lips.

"Sirius," she breathed in a voice he had never heard from her. She moved her hands inside his robes and hooked her fingers into the belt loops of his trousers to pull him flush against her.

A surge of electricity rocked through him when his growing arousal knocked right against her center. She moaned, and he froze, desperate for it to happen again but knowing he had to control himself. With the greatest amount of effort, he wrenched his lips from her neck and stepped back. _That_ could not happen yet, or he would ravish her right there in the passage and not be able to stop himself.

"Something wrong?" Isabella said between breaths.

Sirius swallowed when he finally let himself look at her. Her ponytail had come loose, her eyes were dark with desire, and her lips were plump and glistening; she was grinning at him. The love bite he had started on her neck was already visible. She looked stunning in the low firelight of the passage.

"No," he said, stepping towards her again. "I'm just trying to stay in line with your 'going slow' provision." But even as he said it, he raised his hand to cup her cheek and bring her lips to his again, kissing her slowly and deliberately this time.

It was impossible to stay away. It had been their first real snog since the morning of her birthday. At this rate, Sirius was hoping to achieve a feel-up under her shirt by the time summer came.

Isabella caught his bottom lip and sucked on it with such fervor that he couldn't help thinking of her lips pleasuring other parts of his body. The thought drew a strangled moan from him, and he felt his blood rushing into his groin and his control slipping again. He pulled back. Isabella huffed quietly in disappointment.

He rested his forehead against hers and tried to slow his breath. "You know, if those rumors are true, I don't mind you screwing me over as much as you want."

Isabella scoffed through a smile and pushed him away. She smoothed her shirt, straightened her robes, and touched her neck delicately.

"Is there a mark?"

Sirius grinned sheepishly. "Afraid so. Sorry."

"No, you're not."

"Okay, I'm not," Sirius said with a shrug. "But you didn't seem to mind at the time."

"Oh, I'm not upset." Isabella quickly refastened her hair into a ponytail before adding, "just wanted to know."

"Nothing a scarf can't hide."

"Who says I want to hide it?" She winked at him and grabbed his hand again.

Sirius cocked an eyebrow as he held the tapestry aside for her to pass. "Aren't you worried it will only add fuel to those rumors?"

"I've learned quickly in the past week that I can't worry myself stupid over what others have to say. They're annoying, yes, but Adam knowing he got to me is much worse."

"Ah, so if what other people think doesn't matter as much, why don't we ditch Potions and spend the rest of the afternoon in my bed?"

"Too fast," she said warningly.

Sirius raised his free hand in defense. "Noted," he chuckled.

"And speaking of Adam," she said, her tone returning to light concern. "I think the point has been made. I don't think he'll have much else to say about us from here on out."

"I haven't the faintest idea of what you are talking about," Sirius said, looking ahead and trying to keep his face impassive.

"Of course you don't." She rolled her eyes. "I was just expressing my opinion."

Sirius grinned. "Again, noted."

He glanced at Isabella out the corner of his eye. This _something_ was slowly taking on a life of its own, which was making Sirius slightly unsettled. Isabella was taking some control and challenging him, which no other girl had done before. He was used to getting what he wanted when he wanted it, but Isabella was going to make him work for her affection, both the physical and emotional aspects of it. And, at least for right now, Sirius was up for the challenge.

But Sirius was able to smile about one sure thing. Despite Isabella's best efforts to keep her distance, she had bared a little more than what Sirius knew she had wanted to in that passage. She _wanted_ him—physically—just as much as he wanted her. And he planned to take advantage of that fact as much as he possibly could.

They continued to chat quietly until Dolohov and Snape came around a corner into their corridor, both carrying several envelopes in their hands and speaking in low voices. A step behind them was Regulus, and the familiar rush of anger and anguish Sirius always felt at seeing his brother surged through him so powerfully that he inadvertently tightened his grip on Isabella's hand.

The two groups continued towards each other until Regulus cleared his throat. Snape and Dolohov looked back at him in question. When he inclined his head toward Sirius and Isabella, the two elder Slytherins turned back and spotted the couple for the first time.

Snape's face remained blank, but Dolohov smirked viciously between the two, and Sirius felt Isabella's whole body tense. He instinctively reached for his wand inside his robes, but Dolohov only scoffed at the gesture as they came within a meter of each other. Sirius figured that the Slytherins' business in the Owlery was too important to begin a duel or even taunting, at the very least. And that fact didn't sit well with him.

Sirius' eyes met Regulus', whose own were filled with an emotion that Sirius could not place. Regulus' gaze flickered to Isabella before returning to Sirius with surprise and…was that fear, or a warning? Sirius raised his eyebrows in question, but Regulus turned away as he passed them.

"What was that?" Isabella asked, startling Sirius out of his thoughts. They had remained quiet until they reached the seventh floor.

"I don't know," Sirius said gruffly.

Isabella sighed heatedly and pulled Sirius past the Fat Lady who shamelessly watched them. She then turned to face him after rounding the corner at the end of the corridor. Sirius could see irritation and anxiety in her features.

"That was Regulus, your brother, right?"

"Yeah." He put his hands in his trouser pockets and looked away from her; he was not in the mood to talk about his brother, their relationship, or anything relating to his family, especially this early. In his opinion, it simply was none of Isabella's business right now.

"What was that look you shared?"

"There was no look," Sirius said shortly.

"Don't give me that bullshit, Sirius." He could hear the ire bubbling beneath the surface. She shook his arm to force his attention back to her. "He looked at me and then looked back at you with…I don't know, but it wasn't exactly friendly."

"Things aren't friendly between us," Sirius said, trying to keep control of his voice. "I'm sure you've noticed that, or at the very least, learned it from your gabby friends."

Isabella stared hard at him for a few more seconds before her resolve softened; she sighed. "Don't you worry about him, running about with those fools?"

"All the damn time," Sirius said in a tight voice, still looking away from her.

It was hard not to, especially this past week. Regulus was fourteen now; his birthday was the day before Isabella's, which was a significant reason why Sirius had thrown himself into planning something elaborate for her. He hadn't wanted to think about another year passing with his brother surrounded by people who ultimately did not care about him.

Sirius had realized long ago that Regulus was too far gone to be 'saved,' and that his family and Slytherin friends would not allow Sirius anywhere near him to even try. But he still felt an overwhelming sense of emptiness and failure every time he thought about their former bond and what could have been done to save it.

He looked back at Isabella, wanting to be annoyed with her, but knowing it was stupid. She was the only one of his girlfriends or flings to ask about the situation with his brother, or even show concern over it. And as obstinate as he was, he could appreciate that. But still, it was something he wasn't comfortable talking about with her; that part of their growing emotional connection would have to wait, and she had to understand that. Sirius took his hands out of his pockets and resumed a less defensive stance.

"Isabella, I'm not ashamed to admit that I hate my family—my parents, and aunts and uncles—but things with my brother are complicated, and I don't like to think or talk about the situation much. It's nothing against you"—he grabbed her hands for emphasis—"but I don't think it's smart to drag it into what we're trying to develop right now."

Isabella looked displeased with his response for only a few seconds before nodding. "I understand."

"And that's all I ask," he said before giving her hands a squeeze. "Come on, we have Potions."

They walked back to the Fat Lady in silence, Isabella gave the password, and she climbed in ahead of him. Sirius watched her for a minute, trying to recover his bearings. He didn't intend on his brother or family being an issue so early on, but he had been foolish not to consider it.

The last part of his interaction with Regulus was bothering him the most, though. Separately, he and Isabella were already targets in the Slytherins' eyes—he, the ungrateful, traitorous Black heir, and her, the daughter of a Ministry-affiliated, Auror-training so-called blood-traitor—but he never took into account how their dating would affect that. If anything, it seemed to have made their individual situations worse, and his in particular. He knew his family and the Slytherins he had personal feuds with—Snape, Avery, Dolohov, and Mulciber—would love nothing more than to see him battered and beaten, with everything and everyone he cared for destroyed. And that would now include Isabella.

_How could I have been so stupid?_ he thought angrily, clenching his fists. The idea of any of them even pointing their wands at Isabella made him want to hit something.

Sirius forced himself to calm down and finally made his way through the portrait hole, his head and chest suddenly heavy. No matter how well things started to work out for him, something always came along to spoil the pumpkin juice. The immense pleasure he had felt exacting revenge on Adam and having Isabella in his arms just minutes ago was long gone.

And on top of everything else, the full moon was tomorrow. He hated going into a transformation agitated; it always made for a long and turbulent night. In such previous situations, he would have been able to lose himself in his girl at the time and release some tension, but seeing as how he and Isabella were averaging a snog a week, he assumed she wouldn't be the one to help him.

Sirius watched her pack her bag while chatting with Jane and Keira and he frowned. _Hmm, maybe I'm _not_ cut out for this 'slow' or girlfriend thing right now._

_

* * *

_

Lily tossed six pufferfish eyes into the pale blue potion in her cauldron and gave it three stirs. It turned to a glossy candy-apple red and crackled like fireworks, the popping sounds echoing noisily against the walls of the empty Potions classroom. She tossed in a rosemary stem, and the crackling stopped immediately. Lily gave a small smile; the rosemary had been one of the many beneficial additions she had discovered in her Potions exploits.

But today's project was no real challenge. Since she and Severus had made the breakthrough with the Mandrakes, Slughorn had not had much advanced work for them to do. He thought it best in case St. Mungo's wanted their help with the Mandrakes again, which would force them to halt whatever they were working on.

Lily didn't like that excuse, however. She had a niggling feeling that Slughorn was still upset with her for ending her collaboration with Severus, and in retaliation, was giving him the more interesting projects. Lily had not been able to hide her disappointment on Friday afternoon when Slughorn gave her list of potions to make as examples for his second year students—kid's stuff that she could brew in her sleep.

She glared at her potion at the thought of Severus getting the better assignments. And then her mind wandered to the last time she had seen him—at the Hospital Wing entrance with that gaudy watch clasped around his scrawny wrist. Lily had been trying not to think about Severus, but after that run-in, her mind had strayed to him more often than she liked.

Lily was afraid for him. There was no mistaking what such close association with Lucius Malfoy meant. She wasn't sure if Malfoy was a Death Eater, but he was acquainted with people who Keira said she would bet hundreds of Galleons were in Voldemort's inner circle.

Was Severus next in line? Did they let people in that young? What tasks would he be charged with if he were made a Death Eater? The questions had run through her mind relentlessly before she admitted to Keira what had happened. Keira had looked at her sternly and shook her head.

"Who cares if he is?" Keira had said harshly. "He made his choice, Lily, and it _wasn't_ _you_. I know it's hard to let go, but he doesn't deserve your concern. Severus is pathetic, and if he was foolish enough to join those idiots, then he deserves everything he has coming to him."

Lily had frowned at that. "Severus doesn't deserve to die; he's just a little impressionable."

"And that's _his_ problem," Keira had countered fiercely. "Don't let him gain control over the direction of your life again, Lily. You were doing so well. You have Elias now; let Severus _go_."

"Easier said than done," Lily muttered as she stirred her potion six more times. She set the spoon aside, sat back in her chair, and grabbed her Charms textbook. The potion needed to simmer for another 30 minutes before it was done.

Lily lost herself in her Charms work, the one subject that regularly competed with Potions as her favorite. And considering her current frustration with Slughorn right now, Charms was winning. She finished reading the assigned chapter on silent Charm work and checked her watch. It was 9:30.

Lily stirred the potion once more before setting her spoon aside and extinguishing the fire. She grabbed her wand and pointed it at the supply shelves at the back of the classroom.

"_Accio_ flasks," she said clearly, and four large flasks flew towards her and landed neatly on her desk. She carefully ladled potion into them, stoppered them, and labeled them with her wand before setting them aside. She then consulted her list for the next potion.

"Reducing Solution," she grumbled with a shake of her head. "Of course." She raised her wand and pointed at the cauldron. "_Scourgify_," she ordered. The cauldron scrubbed itself clean, and she started another fire beneath it.

With a sigh, Lily stood and turned towards the ingredients cupboard but gasped when the classroom door opened at the same time. Elias came through holding a covered plate in one hand and a goblet of something in the other, muttering as he tried to maneuver through the door. When he was fully inside the room, he kicked the door shut behind him and looked up at her. He smiled.

"You've been avoiding me."

Lily stiffened, surprised at his candor. "I haven't been—"

"You have," Elias interrupted, but there was no rancor in his voice. "In the past week, I've watched as you returned immediately to the Gryffindor common room after every class or meal. You haven't been in the library at all during our usual meeting times, have spent every one of our mutual breaks holed up in your dormitory, and the two evenings I sent Hercules up with a note asking if you wanted to spend some time together have been declined with messages of you not feeling well. You haven't said anything more to me than 'Hi,' 'Bye,' and 'I'll catch up with you later.'"

Lily stared at him, unsure of what to say. She thought back to every one of Elias' charges, and realized that they were true.

"And even now," Elias said as he placed the plate and goblet down on the desk with her potions, "it's barely after 9:30 on a Sunday morning, and you skipped breakfast to brew"—he picked up the nearest flask and frowned—"Swelling Solution, something you could easily throw together between classes. So why don't you tell me what's going on."

Lily wished she herself knew exactly was going on. She wasn't sure how to articulate what she was feeling without sounding like an idiot.

"Elias…I honestly don't know what to say—"

"I think I have an idea."

Lily raised an eyebrow.

Elias turned and sat across from her on the opposite desk as she stood. If she took a couple of steps forward, she would fit snuggly between his thighs. She pushed the thought out of her mind and tried to pay attention to his words.

He cleared his throat. "I think it has to do with something I said that morning we spent a break in my dorm and something _you_ said the night of your birthday."

That caught Lily off guard, and her eyes widened in surprise. She thought back to her birthday with mixed feelings. Elias had taken her to the Room of Requirement, which was filled with flowers around a huge, plush pallet of blankets. The way Elias had looked upon her, kissed her, touched and caressed her, and whispered admirations in her ear had strengthened her feelings for Elias so acutely that she had been slightly unnerved.

With the alcohol spurring her on, she had begged Elias to make love to her, using those exact words. He had refused in the most gentlemanly way, claiming that she was more than just a little tipsy and wanted her to be of clear mind when they took that next step, but she had still felt the burning sting of rejection to the point that she had not shared the details of that night with her roommates. And now that she was thinking about it, it had probably been the reason for her avoidance of him that increased as the days passed over the last couple of weeks, especially since _his_ words had still been on her mind.

But now his acknowledgement of the morning they had spent in his bed and what he had said took up her whole attention. "You've been thinking about that?"

"Just recently. It took me a while to think of what could have caused such a drastic change between us."

"So…?"

"So let's talk about this 'love' thing."

Lily wasn't sure what kind of face she made, but Elias was smiling again.

"I guess I'll have to go first," he chuckled. "I care about you a lot; I look forward to our time together, and am proud to call you my girlfriend." His smile then faltered a little, and he took a deep breath. "But…I'm not…exactly—"

"It's okay," Lily blurted. She wasn't sure why, but she didn't want him to have to say the word that had caused so much uneasiness between them.

Elias nodded, his expression relieved. "And I hate that I so stupidly blurted it out and made things awkward and uncomfortable. It was not my intention to mislead you or maybe pressure you in any way. I was just—"

"Caught up in the moment," Lily finished for him. She had released the breath she was holding and felt her heart slow down. She was surprised at how relieved she felt at his words.

"Yeah," Elias said sheepishly. "I'm really sorry about that."

Lily smirked. "I guess I can't be too upset—means I was doing something right."

"Too right." He blushed but seemed a bit more relaxed now that there was some levity.

"I really enjoy being with you, too, Elias," Lily said, wanting to get her own true feelings out now. "But…me neither…and I've been questioning myself incessantly in the weeks since that morning, afraid that something was wrong with me."

He sighed. "Which is what I was afraid of. I'm sorry about causing that. I mean, think about it. We both came into this after serious relationships; we've been a bit guarded—emotionally at least."

Lily nodded absently and thought back to the beginning of their relationship. The idea of Elias being a rebound had crossed her mind a couple of times then, but she had brushed it aside, thinking that she didn't care enough about Severus anymore for him to be an issue.

_God, how wrong I was_, she thought bitterly.

But then she looked back at Elias and smiled. She was slightly annoyed that it had taken so long to hash this out, but the fact he had acknowledged it at all was something most boys wouldn't have taken the time to do.

"That's true," Lily finally said. "But I don't want you to think I came into this looking for a rebound."

Elias shook his head. "I never thought that." He then grabbed her hands and pulled her between his legs. "So are we okay?"

Lily thought for a moment. Without a doubt, this had been an extremely awkward conversation to have, but Lily knew she would have eventually pushed him away for good if it hadn't happened. She grudgingly thought back to her time with Severus and how such a discussion would have never taken place. He was always so guarded with his emotions and thoughts, would never show weakness. She was lucky that Elias had enough humility to be honest and upfront with her.

"We're more than okay," Lily assured him with a smile as she clasped her hands around his neck; Elias didn't hesitate to grab her waist and pull her even closer. It was the closest they had been since her birthday. Lily was able to admire his startlingly blue eyes for only a second before their lips met.

Their kisses were frenzied, both desperate to make up for lost time, and Lily had trouble keeping up with Elias' eager roaming hands. Within minutes, Elias had maneuvered them so that Lily was now sitting on the desk with him standing between her thighs. She immediately wrapped her legs around him to pull him closer before grinding her hips against his.

Elias groaned as he started placing open-mouth kisses along her jaw and down to her collarbone, his scruff scratching her skin in the most tantalizing way. He ran his lips back up her neck to her ear and hesitated a moment before saying, "My dormitory is free."

Lily swallowed, knowing what his statement implied, but she was uncertain. Was it smart to return back to the place where the trouble had started so soon after working everything out? She knew what her body wanted—it had ignited the moment Elias touched her—but it was hard for her brain to think clearly as his hands continued to guide her hips against his own.

She was sick of trying to justify and rationalize her every action and feeling; she had done it every bloody moment she was with Severus and had still been screwed in the end. So what if she wasn't in love with Elias yet? Lily trusted him, and, right now, that's all that mattered.

She pulled back slightly and cupped his face with her hands. "Lead the way."

Elias grinned as she quickly hopped off the desk and grabbed her wand. He took her hand, and they all but ran out the classroom, her breakfast and potions left forgotten on the front desk. Lily had only enough thought to remember to extinguish the fire beneath the empty cauldron before they were out the door.

* * *

"My _favorite_ prank?" Sirius furrowed his brow, his expression thoughtful. "That's a tough one. Let me think for a moment."

Isabella nodded, took a sip from her bottle, and gazed out towards the balcony at the falling snow. The blanketed grounds were a picturesque sight, but she was happy to be out of the cold and in the comfortable, warm confines of Sirius' arms.

It was Hogsmeade Saturday, but the aforementioned heavy snowfall, Siruis' apathy after countless Hogsmeade visits, and Isabella's own boredom after three trips had compelled them to return to the castle much earlier than normal. They would have come back even sooner if it weren't for their stop in Honeydukes and Isabella's need to buy one of almost everything with the excuse of needing to replenish her already well-stocked secret sweet supply. However, for all of Sirius' complaints, jibes, and insistence that he didn't care for sweets, Isabella had been intrigued to see him buy a sizable slab of the darkest chocolate Honeydukes offered. With a sly smile, she had made a mental note for future reference.

They had still wanted privacy upon returning, so Isabella suggested the deserted fourth floor classroom with the balcony that she knew was frequented by Lily and Elias. After a quick stop to the kitchens for some sandwiches, they retreated to the small room, where Sirius transfigured a couple of chairs into a squashy loveseat. Isabella was now reclining against the armrest with her legs lying across Sirius' lap, enjoying the warm butterbeer they had brought back with them. The low lamplight cast a soft glow on the room, giving it a more intimate feel. She sincerely hoped Lily and Elias, and everyone else for that matter, stayed away.

She was trying to pay attention to the story he had just begun about his favorite prank—something about a centaur, Peeves, a Fanged Whizbee, several wood nymphs, and the Sorting Hat—but his left hand was resting on her inner right thigh with his thumb moving back and forth with just the right amount of pressure. It seemed like an idle touch, but Isabella was sure Sirius' intentions were far from chaste.

They had been anything but in the two weeks that had passed since Sirius kissed some sense back into her after the week of her self-imposed separation. People continued to gossip, but Isabella had noticed that it had died down some. Even Lily had stopped her frequent "Are you really sure about this?"

When Isabella told her roommates about Sirius' surprise the morning of her birthday, she had been expecting Keira's delighted squeal and Jane's indifferent shrug, but Lily's strained smile had caught her off guard. She knew Lily's concern was in good faith, but it was still slightly annoying. Isabella had heard many assumed and confirmed faults about Sirius, and while she refused to blind herself to them and let herself get swept up in a false fantasy, she had promised to give this a chance. Besides, learning about Sirius on her own was a lot more enjoyable.

Isabella had so far learned that Sirius was very physically attentive, was always finding a way to touch her, like now. Always grabbing her hand, wrapping an arm around her shoulders or waist, caressing her knee when they sat next to each other. She was also happy to discover that his brooding was often a front, as he was actually quite talkative, especially about his friends and their adventures, and particularly when they were alone.

However, she had been warned that Sirius was hard to please and easily irascible, and she had experienced the latter after encountering his brother that Friday afternoon. He was also extremely guarded and often capricious, making Isabella feel like the center of his world one moment and a forgettable sidekick the next. And the most baffling so far had included him and his roommates completely disappearing one Saturday evening, not to be seen again until Monday morning.

"Quality time with my mates," Sirius had explained with a tone of finality that Isabella had not appreciated but did not question.

But overall, Isabella mused, things had been going well…except the fact that she was constantly thinking about sex. _Constantly_. It was difficult to avoid considering the fact that she was a virgin and Sirius, well, was not. And he was a teenage wizard, which meant that it was going to come up sooner than later. Isabella wasn't sure how she was going to confront it when it did, for she had not been able to resist him yet.

Just last night Sirius had taken her to the Room of Requirement that she had heard so much about from Lily and, more recently, Keira. Isabella had been breathless when she walked into a nearly exact replica of Central Park in the summer. After a necessary hour of homework, she had somehow found herself pressed against the cool, soft grass under the weight of Sirius' body as his mouth worked over her neck and across her collarbone.

When his hands had begun to roam under her shirt, as they had done for the first time just a few days prior, she ripped it off in haste and pulled her bra up over her head. Sirius had stared at her with a mix of confusion and admiration for a few seconds before attacking her. His hands and lips had moved across her chest with such expertise that just a few movements of his hips against her own had sent her over the edge only minutes later. She had started to unbutton Sirius' shirt, but he had reluctantly stopped her, insisting that they return to the common room not too late after curfew since they did not have his special map or James' cloak.

Isabella's skin began to tingle as she watched Sirius' lips continue to tell a story that she would never be able to recall. Remembering the marks they had left on her skin last night…imagining how they would feel delicately moving over her most sensitive area as he stared up at her from between her thighs. She sucked in a breath at the vivid imagery and felt a strong squeeze on her leg in response.

"Huh?" Isabella said, startled a bit.

"I said 'are you alright?'"

"Why?"

Sirius chuckled lightly. "You've been staring at me quite oddly for the last few minutes, and I don't think you've absorbed a single word I've said over the last ten."

"Just thinking," Isabella said lightly with a shrug.

"About?"

"Noth—" Isabella then shook her head and smiled, figuring she should just be honest. She was sure Sirius would get it out of her eventually. Clearing her throat, she met his gaze boldly. "Actually, I was thinking about temptation."

Sirius cocked an eyebrow and tried to repress a satisfied grin. "Temptation?" Isabella nodded. "What about it?"

"How do you all deal with it here?"

"Who is 'you all?'"

"The students and couples of Hogwarts, I mean. It's just…constant." She looked away at her last words, already feeling embarrassed about how much she was exposing right now.

"It didn't exist at your former school?" His tone was laced with skepticism.

"It did, but since you usually saw your boyfriend or girlfriend only once a month, you had to find ways to control it. It's much different here. Classes and curfew aside, you can see and be alone with whomever you're dating practically whenever you want." Her voice lowered to nearly a whisper. "It's almost overwhelming." Which Isabella knew was part of the reason she had let their physical contact progress at a pace much quicker than what she would have deemed appropriate less than a year ago.

Sirius' eyes narrowed disbelievingly. "If I recall correctly: 'You'd be surprised at how inventive teenagers could get when their hormones are raging,'" Sirius tittered, matching her voice almost too perfectly.

"I can't believe you remembered that," she said, laughing as she thought back to their first trip to Hogsmeade.

He shrugged. "I thought it was very telling of the girl I was dealing with. Just how often were you _inventive_ when the need arose?"

"Not often." This was only partially true, though, as it had been mostly Garret doing the sneaking around, but Sirius didn't have to know that. His nonchalance didn't fool her; she knew Sirius wanted to know her history with Garret and whatever other unknown boy while at Morgana, but she wasn't going to divulge it all just yet.

"And how do you quantify 'often?'"

"Why does it matter?" Isabella dodged his question. "Besides, I'm sure you've been inventive enough for the both of us." She wondered if he would take the bait; she couldn't deny that she wanted to know all about his past too.

"Which you got a taste of and seem quite pleased with a few weeks ago." He didn't care to hide his smirk. "And the great thing about Hogwarts is that there is an infinite number of unused classrooms, broom closets, hidden passages, and veiled copses through the grounds so couples don't have to resist temptation when it presents itself."

The timbre of his voice towards the end had caused goosebumps to erupt across her skin. "But it's not always good to give into temptation. Half the fun is the anticipation."

He smirked. "Maybe so, but in the end, why not just follow through? You only live once."

At the same time he said this, he ran his hand higher up her thigh and gave another squeeze dangerously close to her center. Isabella let out a shuddering breath that was quickly stifled when he kissed her. His demanding lips moved in time with his hand that was still squeezing her inner thigh, and Isabella squirmed as his tongue forced its way into her mouth, hoping he'd move his hand a little to the right, but it stayed resolutely in place.

Frustrated with his teasing, Isabella broke the kiss and sat back against the armrest with a heavy sigh.

"How's that anticipation working out for you, then?" Sirius asked with a slight snigger.

Isabella rolled her eyes but was unable to suppress her own grin. She really was making it too easy for him to win. "You're such a—a git."

"Nice one."

Isabella sat up suddenly, wanting to even the playing field by making him a bit uncomfortable, and she could think of only one subject that would do just that.

"I have a question to ask. Promise you'll be honest?"

Sirius eyed her warily but didn't back down. "Shoot."

"How many girls have you slept with?"

His expression remained unchanged. "Pretty presumptuous of you to ask before inquiring if I'm a virgin first."

"You do know who my roommates are, don't you?" she asked with an arched brow.

"Fair enough. I'm not ashamed." He paused for a moment before meeting her eye. "If you must know, I've been with four girls."

_Four._ She was only slightly relieved since it was less than what she was expecting, but there were still four girls who had had him before her with at least one she knew who would more than welcome him back into her bed. If Sirius was as hard to please as people warned her, Isabella wondered how long his patience and affection for her would hold out until she was ready.

"Mmhmm," Isabella mumbled with a nod, trying for indifference. "And how old were you when—"

"Fifteen."

This time she couldn't hide her disbelief, and her mouth fell open. "Fifteen?" Isabella thought back to when she was fifteen. Nina had shared with her, Lana, and Jasmine about how she had lost her virginity to Chris over Thanksgiving weekend. Jasmine had just had her first kiss; Lana was debating if she should start taking birth control potion. Garret was still learning his way around her breasts, and she had helped him climax for the first time together by rubbing a tentative hand furiously over the bulge in his pants.

"Yep, fifteen," he repeated, though Isabella heard no definitive pride, nor shame, in his voice. "It was Cori Kelly, a sixth year at the time. Quidditch after party. We were drunk, but having sex was the most important thing to me at the time despite knowing that I was going to be absolute rubbish. Then Regina Webb, a Ravenclaw. She would be a seventh year now if it weren't for the family's move to Spain for her father's job. Then Jane, and finally Daphne."

"Oh."

He wasn't looking at her, staring at the falling snow instead, and she instantly felt embarrassed for initiating the conversation, especially considering that he was not yet her boyfriend. But then again, he could have easily declined to answer, and she still had one last burning question.

"What you and Jane had, was it serious?"

"She sure makes it seem like it was, doesn't she?" he replied, chuckling now. He looked at Isabella and shook his head. "No, definitely not. It happened around this time last year, after a particularly foul winter holiday at home with the family. That and there was strife between me and the guys for a horribly egregious prank I had hastily initiated with no thought. I needed a distraction, and she willingly took the role. It was just about the sex, for me anyway, and lasted only a few weeks."

"You speak so lowly of Jane, but then you dated Daphne?"

He shrugged. "Easier to control."

Isabella frowned as he watched him down the rest of his butterbeer. His tone and words had been plain, unforgiving, and free of shame. He had not one good thing to say about any girl so far, and she wondered what he would say about her to the next if things ended up not working out between them.

_But you asked_, she reminded herself, realizing too late that this was one of things you left well enough alone, especially when already insecure about the boy you were dating.

"So what about you?" Sirius asked after a short moment of silence. He leaned over and placed his empty bottle on the floor before turning to look at her. He waggled his brows. "Are you a virgin?"

"What do you think?"

"No. No, no, no." He was shaking his head and waving an admonitory finger. "I don't think so. I'm not heading down that road. I say 'no,' and you think that I imagine you some type of easy bird. 'Yes,' and you accuse me of thinking that you're some prude ice queen who no one wants to shag in the first place."

"You can't be serious. You think that's how girls process things?"

Sirius folded his arms defiantly, and Isabella immediately missed his touch. "From the ones I've dealt with, I'd bet my wand on it."

Isabella sat up fully and removed her legs from his lap, folding them under her. "I promise I won't get offended either way."

"Alright."

He appraised her for a full minute, letting his gaze sweep over her body, dressed in a simple sweater and jeans. Twice his eyes had stopped pointedly at her breasts, which made her think he was only goading her. She was sure he had formed his opinion about her sexual history the minute they started dating, if not sooner. He finally met her eye again.

"Yes, you are. And I only say that because the ones not doing it are the ones who want to talk about it the most." He raised his eyebrows. "Am I right?"

She smiled ruefully. Was she really that transparent? "Yes."

"And you're not offended?" he said, unable to hide his triumphant smirk.

"No.

"Do you think I asked you out only to get into your knickers?"

"No."

"And are you afraid that I will pressure you into doing something you're not yet ready for?"

Isabella gave a furtive smile before shifting to straddle Sirius' lap; he moaned appreciatively in response. "Honestly, at the rate I'm going, you won't have to."

She knew she was wandering into dangerous territory, but too late to stop now. His hands were already under her sweater squeezing her breasts, his teeth nipping the skin of her neck, her hands threading through his soft black hair, their hips moving in rhythm.

Her shoddily built guard was already crumbling. What was that she had said about this being a competition of wits? Sirius was clearly winning, as to be expected since he had been playing this game much longer than she had. But then her sweater was gone, her bra unhooked, and as Sirius' lips closed around a taut nipple, Isabella figured losing had its advantages before all coherent thought was wiped from her mind.

* * *

**A/N: I know it's been a while. Forgive me. I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and there's more coming soon. I really appreciate those who continue to follow the story; let me know your thoughts!**


	18. By Your Side

James wasn't sure whom he hated most right now: the meddling Professor Slughorn or his traitorous best friends.

He had to admit that Slughorn's ideas to liven up class every now and then were mildly entertaining, and the professor's current idea to pit house against house to brew the best version of Everlasting Elixir would definitely help break the monotony, but the stipulation that students had to pair off _within_ their house was simply unfair.

The problem was that there were six Gryffindors in sixth year N.E.W.T. Potions, and four of them just happened to be dating right now. As soon as Slughorn finished explaining the competition and released them to start, Sirius had sidled up to Isabella, while Remus had rushed to Keira's side, leaving James to work with Lily. He didn't understand why his friends would do this to him; yes, there were three of them, but James and Sirius or James and Remus would have left the odd-one-out free to pair with his girl—a win-win situation. He vaguely wondered if he had unknowingly slighted his mates in some way in recent days.

By the looks of it, Lily didn't appear too happy about the situation either. She cast dark glances at her roommates, who both smiled apologetically in response, before gathering her things and heading towards the back of the class to James' work table. On her way, she caught Smith's eye, who winked at her, and was followed by Delilah's cold stare.

"Potter," she greeted civilly as she placed her cauldron and book bag on the desk. "You want to get the fire started while I retrieve the ingredients?"

"Sure." James grabbed his wand and promptly ignited a fire beneath her polished cauldron, a little taken aback from the lack of irritation in her voice that she usually reserved only for him. Happy about their pairing she may not be, but it looked as if she wasn't going to go out of her way to make it difficult either.

It wasn't as though there was a problem between him and Lily right now; they literally had not spoken more than two words to each other over the past several months, but that was more out of indifference than annoyance or anger. She was with Elias, and he with Delilah; as long as James wasn't chasing her, there was no reason for them to interact.

But the whole 'out of sight, out of mind' theory had never worked for James when it came to Lily. Even if only subconsciously, Lily was always in the back of his mind, _would_ always be in the back of his mind. Regardless of how much she despised him, Lily would always be the most stunning and fascinating girl he had ever laid eyes upon, and no girlfriend, no matter how serious, would ever change that.

He had been doing a great job ignoring her presence as he had promised, but there had been a few times, specifically when he and Delilah were on the outs, when his guard slipped and he would catch himself watching her run her fingers through her gorgeous red hair before tying it back, or cross and uncross her legs while sitting in her favorite chair in the common room, causing her skirt to ride up a bit, or chew on her bottom lip as she feverishly prepared her potions.

And even before hearing Slughorn's lesson plan, James knew this was going to be one of those times when he would have to fight such a moment of weakness because he and Delilah were in a row—_again_. About a month had passed since their last argument, but James wasn't sure how much longer he would be able to stand their constant cycle of near breakups to makeups, even though making up was always so enjoyable.

Their current quarrel had started about a week ago when her father's aunt had been caught in the crossfire of a Death Eater attack. Meaning to confront her neighbor, a senior Auror, they had burst into her home by mistake and immediately Stunned the frightened woman as she fed her cats. The combined shock of the masked men and the curse on her old heart had done her in. Reginald, Delilah's father, had contacted Delilah via emergency floo that same night, and preparations were made for her to return home that weekend for the funeral services.

James of course had felt sad for his girlfriend when she came out of Flitwick's office and told him the story. He had taken her to the Room of Requirement and stayed up with her all night, wiping away her tears and holding her close as she tried to sleep. But in the morning when she asked him to accompany her home and to the funeral, James had respectfully declined, remarking how he had not known the woman, did not know anyone in her family besides her parents, and that a funeral was not the time for such introductions.

Delilah, in turn, had called him heartless and unsupportive before stomping back to Ravenclaw Tower, and he had been the target of relentless glares from her and her friends for the rest of the day. He thought it all a bit rich since he recalled her telling him months ago that she wasn't very close to a lot of the family on her father's side after a falling out they had had with Delilah's mother, but even James knew then was not the time to point that out.

When she left for the weekend without saying goodbye, James felt the beginnings of guilt creep up on him. He even went so far as to ask for Remus' opinion on the matter and had been relieved when Remus agreed with his reasoning, but James had realized that he should still apologize to Delilah for making her upset during a stressful time.

So he had waited for her outside Flitwick's office on Sunday evening, when she was scheduled to return by floo, but she walked past him with a condescending glare and without a word. James had been so enraged by her immaturity that he had stayed in place instead of pursuing her to her common room, which he knew was what she wanted. It was now Wednesday, and they still had not spoken.

However, he had a feeling that Delilah was going to break soon if her displeasure over his partnering with Lily was any indication. The entire school knew his history; if there was any girl that could cause Delilah and every previous girlfriend to doubt James' affection for her, it was Lily. That, and his birthday was in a few short days, which she had been incessantly chatting about before their fallout. He knew she would not let it pass without some big fanfare, which he was dreading.

But to hell with it all now because despite his girlfriend being in the same room and his vow from several months ago to forget about Lily, he had a whole hour to shamelessly look at and talk to her without consequence, and he was going to take full advantage of it.

Lily finally returned from the crowded ingredients cupboard, and James helped her organize the supplies on their table. She then consulted _Advanced Potion Making_, mumbling to herself as a finger ran down the list of directions.

"Okay, Potter, looks like we have to start with the beetles; they'll take the longest to cook," she said, her eyes still on the recipe. "Would you mind—" But she stopped herself when she looked over and saw that James was already cutting the beetles into the appropriate size. "Have you brewed this before?"

James shook his head. "No, but I looked over the list while you were at the cupboard and noticed the beetles right away. I knew they needed to be prepared first because I've overheard you several times telling Keira and Jane last year about how tricky beetles can be and how you should always start with them despite what the instructions call for. I've seen you always prepare them first."

It wasn't until James finished speaking that he realized how much he had exposed to her right now without thinking—that he took to eavesdropping on her conversations, even those as mundane as involving potions, and that he had watched her closely and consistently enough to pick up on her classroom habits.

Less than two minutes into indulging his greatest unrequited desire and James was already at her mercy. He grew annoyed with himself, with the fact that she still had that type of effect on him. He stopped his chopping, cleared his throat, and glanced over at her. She was looking at him with a skeptical expression, her eyebrow arched and a slight smirk at her lips.

"Maybe you should take to watching me more often," she said, letting her eyes fall back to her book. "Maybe then you could keep a passing grade in this class, or had even won Felix Felicis on the first day."

That caught James off guard. He'd been expecting a roll of her eyes, a huff of annoyance, a glare, or maybe an accusation of him being a stalking, nosey bugger. But not this, not this hint of a smile or mild bantering.

James thought that boyfriend of hers might have something to do with the change in demeanor, though he couldn't be sure since he, James, hadn't paid them much mind since October. Maybe all Lily had needed was a good shag to turn down the frostiness she had worn like armor since their third year, but then the idea of her and Smith shagging caused an abrupt flash of resentment to burn within him, and he quickly pushed the thought out of his mind. He returned to cutting the remaining beetles.

"For your information, Evans, I have never received lower than an 'Excellent' since my first day in Potions. I'm just not the type to go around bragging about my marks or requesting special projects. I have better things to do with my time." He gathered the beetles into his hands and leaned over to dump them into the water she had poured into the cauldron with her wand. "And I don't need some stupid potion to get what I want; I make my own luck."

Lily sniggered under her breath as she began mincing belladonna root. "Well, that luck never seemed to help you get _me_."

James was gobsmacked at her retort but kept his stride. "You never know; maybe it was working to keep me from making the biggest mistake of my young life." He heard her knife slip, and he looked up at her for a second time. She was glaring at him, looking highly affronted. He grinned and started peeling his shrivelfig.

As it turned out, Everlasting Elixir was not a difficult potion to brew due to the number of components or preparation; the complexity was due to the brewing process itself—knowing when and how quickly to add the ingredients, the number of stirs between each addition, reducing the fire at exactly the right moment, a pinch of mint or a dash of sage that the recipe did not call for but that Lily knew enhanced the properties of certain ingredients. All nuances James knew she had picked up during those special projects she undertook, usually with Snape.

And speaking of Snape, James had twice caught him glaring at them as they moved around each other to take turns attending to the cauldron. James thought it odd since Smith, the one who should be bothered, had not paid them any mind, obviously secure in his relationship with Lily or simply not seeing him, James, as competition.

Delilah had glowered at them for a couple extended periods of time, sometimes joined by Marlene, but James pretended to not have noticed. He knew he was being a cad for ignoring her, but her glares were completely unnecessary, especially since he and Lily had not spoken about anything other than their project since their few minutes of light repartee at the start of the assignment. They had not shared any flirtatious glances or lingering smiles—James couldn't be _that_ big of an arsehole in front of his girlfriend regardless of their row—but James had a feeling Delilah would most certainly have an opinion about it as soon as they were talking again.

With all the ingredients in, the potion was to boil for several minutes, leaving them free to their devices. Lily immediately took up her textbook and began reading through other chapters, looking as enthralled as if she were reading her favorite romance novel. A year ago, he would have taken this opportunity to get under her skin—flick parchment scraps at her, repeatedly nudge her chair, or try to snatch away her book, but now he refrained, knowing that not only was it inappropriate with their respective significant others only yards away, but also because he had realized how childish it had all been. It had taken his relationship with Delilah and casual observance of Lily's progression with Smith for him to realize that his pursuit of her had been all wrong; he had treated her like any other silly girl at Hogwarts when she was nothing like them. Lily was someone who deserved more than just a cheeky grin and flirty wink to win her affection.

James' arrogance and friends had had him believing that was all he needed, and that he was better than Snape in every conceivable manner, but at the end of the day, Lily's attention and loyalty had always gone to Snape, not him. He didn't know the extent of Lily and Snape's relationship—didn't _want_ to know—but it had been much more than anything James would ever get to share with her. He helplessly thought back to the words she had spat at him after their Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L.

"I don't want _you_ to make him apologize; you're as bad as he is."

That comparison to Snape still stung James to this day, and her words had been a significant catalyst to what Sirius had recently and gallingly dubbed his Grand Transformation. Impressing Lily had not been the only motivation for his 'growing up,' but he had hope she'd notice and be somewhat friendly towards him. However, he didn't care if he and Lily never progressed past polite schoolmates so long as she never saw him in the same light as Snape again.

As for Smith, James didn't know too much about him other than that he was a terrible Quidditch Captain, a horrible sportsman, and a lousy Hufflepuff. But he obviously possessed whatever Lily wanted in a bloke. She seemed happy with him, and that's all the mattered, James supposed. They would probably be Head Boy and Girl next year, get married soon after school, have thirty children, and live to be 150 years old with the most boring lives ever.

And then James rolled his eyes at his pathetic conjectures. He could be such a sodding girl sometimes.

To distract himself, he looked towards the front of the classroom, where Sirius' table was. Sirius and Isabella were sitting very close together and talking quietly. James had had to congratulate Sirius, for he had been able to gain Isabella's trust and draw her out of her shell despite her early misgivings. They were getting along fine, but James had witnessed Isabella completely rebuff Sirius a few times, which tended to happen on the days after Sirius acted like he couldn't be bothered with a girlfriend, a bad habit that his previous girlfriends had sycophantically put up with. Forgetting that, however, James had a feeling Isabella was more comfortable with Sirius now that the rumors had died down…but only because people's attention had shifted to Remus and Keira.

Remus had yet to refer to Keira as his girlfriend, they didn't hold hands in the corridors, but people had still noticed their constant pairing off, be it in lessons or while walking to class. When Delilah had asked James if Keira was the girl James had been referring to the night they spent in the Prefects' bathroom, he neither confirmed nor denied it, leaving her to draw her own predictions, which had resulted in a fresh wave of speculation the next morning. James didn't see how either Remus or Keira could keep playing it off; anyone watching them now, with Remus leaning against the desk and grinning down at Keira as she smiled back up at him while she spoke, could not miss the obvious attraction between them.

"How long has it been?"

Lily's voice forced James' attention away from his friends and back to her. She had removed her robes at some point, which many students typically did during Potions due to the heat, and his eyes instinctively fell to her legs before finding her face. She looked amused.

He checked his watched, trying not to grin. "Fifteen minutes."

"Let's see what we've got then," she said, standing up. He stood as well and looked into the cauldron. Their potion had transformed into a sea foam green with a slight pearlescent sheen, exactly as their book described. "It's perfect."

"Don't act so surprised, Evans."

"Considering the disasters I've seen you make before, I think I have a right to be."

"And that's time!" Slughorn boomed, causing many students to jump. "Wands down."

They continued to stand and wait as Slughorn went around checking cauldrons and marking a sheet on the clipboard he was holding. After checking Smith and Plies' attempt, Slughorn made his way towards their table.

"Lovely as always, Miss Evans," Slughorn said as he peered into her cauldron. "I hope Mr. Potter here wasn't too much of a distraction?" He then looked up at James and gave a hearty laugh. "Oh, I'm only joking!"

James gave a half-hearted chuckle as Slughorn marked the clipboard.

Slughorn then retrieved a thin brass wire from his pocket and dipped it in the pot. When he removed it, it glowed green and sparkled before returning to its original state. "Ten out of ten," he whispered to Lily with a wink before moving onto the next table.

"So, was I?"

"Hmm?" Lily said absently. She was beaming after Slughorn's comment and ladling a sample into a labeled flask.

"Was I a distraction?"

Lily stoppered her flask and placed it on the desk before looking up at him. She considered him for a moment before saying, "No, you weren't."

James rolled his eyes. "There's that tone of surprise again."

"Alright," Slughorn began, clapping his hands together as he stepped up to his teaching platform. "First of all, well done, everyone, well done. Everlasting Elixir isn't a particularly difficult potion, but too heavy a hand with some ingredients will result in unwanted side effects. It requires a special talent to be able to reproduce it perfectly time and time again." He gave little nods to a couple of Ravenclaws, Lily, and then Snape.

"I have scored each pair's project based on color, consistency, and its reaction with the brass poker. And while all of you prepared some top-notch potions today, the house with the best average score is"—he paused for effect—"Ravenclaw!"

Loud whooping and cheering noises erupted from the Ravenclaw corner of the room; James gritted his teeth and began to pack his bag. He heard Lily scoff in disgust as she started cleaning up.

"Yes, yes, well done. Your reward is a weekend free of Potions homework. For the rest of you, I want two feet on the properties of Everlasting Elixir and how it differs from the often confused Elixir of Life, to be handed in on Monday."

Students from the other three houses groaned in unison before the deafening noises of chairs scrapping on the floor, cleaning of workstations, and schoolbag packing overtook the room.

"Ah well, we'll do better next time," James said as he slung his bag over his shoulder. He could tell that Lily was still annoyed.

"There won't be a next time, not with _you_," she said harshly, stuffing _Advanced Potion Making_ into her bag with a little more force than necessary.

He shrugged. "Fair enough. But this has been a wonderful learning experience, hasn't it?"

She gave him a look as if to say 'you lost me.'

"We can actually work well together when you're not snapping at me."

"Which was only a result of your annoying need to incessantly ask me out."

James stopped short as he passed her, his shoulder brushing lightly against hers. "And we both know how pointless such a request would be now. But I can easily start up again if that's what you'd prefer."

She froze in the middle of fastening her robes and turned her head to look up at him. Their faces were just inches apart; James could have counted the number of freckles on her nose if he wanted to. A light pink rose to her cheeks. She cleared her throat.

"I don't think your girlfriend would appreciate that. Nor would your ego be able to stand the rejection."

James chuckled; the omission of _her_ preference was obvious. "And your boyfriend?"

"What about me?"

They both spun around. Elias was standing at the long end of the work table, regarding James coolly.

"Nothing important," Lily said as James opened his mouth. "Potter was just asking if you're as arrogant, boorish, and juvenile as he is."

"And?"

"Obviously not," James answered before Lily could this time. He hitched his bag higher on his shoulder and continued walking. "Evans only dates boring sods, doesn't she? You'll be able to keep her for a while."

Elias narrowed his eyes but said nothing. James squeezed himself into a large group heading through the doorway to get as far from Lily as possible. He didn't care to wait for his friends.

Minutes later, James reached the ground floor and had one foot on the marble staircase when he felt a small hand slip into his from behind. He turned to see Delilah at his side, smiling broadly. She began to speak, but they were being jostled by students heading to their next class, He shook his head and led her to the unused classrooms furthest down the hall.

Once they were inside, he let go of her hand and turned to face her. She was still smiling but looked apprehensive. A long, silent moment passed; James refused to speak first.

"We have a lot to talk about," Delilah finally said.

"Do we? Because it doesn't seem like a good time for that. I may have a break, but you have Care of Magical Creatures."

Delilah frowned slightly at his unconcerned tone. "I don't mind missing class; fixing this is more important to me."

"There is nothing to 'fix' with us. We had a disagreement, I tried to apologize, but you decided to act like a child and completely ignore me."

"Can you blame me?" Delilah cried. "I had just come back from my aunt's funeral and was still a little hurt that you had so callously refused to come with me. My father asked why you weren't there, and I felt so ridiculous." She then closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened them, calm had restored over her features, and when she spoke again, the hysteria was gone from her voice. "But I now realize how immature of me it was to continue this row when you were so willing to apologize. Many girls would be so lucky to have a boyfriend as caring and contrite as you."

James didn't like her choice of words, as they made him sound like he was always the one in the wrong. She was sweeping this under the rug quicker than she had really wanted to, and he knew at once that she had had no intention of speaking to him this soon had he not just spent an hour in Lily's company. Annoyed, he turned from her and walked to a nearby desk before sitting upon it and facing her again.

"My contrition wouldn't come into play as often as it does if it weren't for your tendency to start stupid arguments as often as you do. If you want to 'fix' something, try fixing your attitude when things don't go your way. Every time you stamp your foot and run away to your common room, I am less inclined to try and mend things."

Color rose to Delilah's cheeks in what James hoped was shame. He could tell that his words had hit her hard, but he had felt the overwhelming need to be truthful. Or maybe his short time in such close proximity to Lily had made clear the differences between the two girls that he had forced to the back of his mind once he had decided to pursue Delilah last fall, unable to ignore them anymore. Everything he liked about Delilah was still there, but the aspects of her personality that were starting to eat at his nerves were the things he knew Lily would never be guilty of—specifically, the desperation to please him, the constant insecurity, and the need to test the sincerity of his affection for her.

But then again, Delilah _was_ still here, wanting to be with him despite his own faults as a boyfriend. He didn't understand her motives, but he rather liked having a girlfriend over not having a girlfriend, and Delilah was the best, and only, fit at the moment. If only for a little longer, he'd keep at it because she too seemed content with mediocrity.

With some effort, he walked towards her and grabbed her hands as the second bell rang. She kept her gaze down.

"Look, let's put this behind us." She raised her eyes, now full of cautious hope, to meet his. "We can't let every little thing get to us." She nodded. "_But_, I think we ought to try being more direct with each other when we are irritated. Do you agree?"

Delilah nodded again and smiled. "You're right. No need to let things the small things escalate."

"Glad that's settled then," James said, letting go of her hands and heading to his bag that he had left on the desk. This last argument had certainly _not_ been a 'small thing,' but if she was willing to get over it, he could too. "Let's get going. You're late." But when he turned towards her and the door, she dropped her own bag and raised her wand.

"_Colloportus_," she said, pointing at the door, and with a suggestive smile, she then set an Imperturbable charm. "I'm already late, so why miss out on the best part of making up?"

James could not help grinning. He knew it was foolish to mess about in a classroom, no matter how deserted, during prime school hours, but he didn't care. After all, wasn't this his main reason for keeping her around?

His carnal side answered a resounding 'Yes!' as Delilah's robes and tie fell to the floor.

* * *

With a grunt, Lily fell into her bed fully dressed. She was aching all over. The body was not meant to Apparate more than fifty times in the span of an hour, but it was what she, and every other sixth year, had to do in order to perfect the tricky form of magic.

They had just finished the last lesson of their twelve-week Apparition training course, and Instructor Twycross, wanting to ensure that they all had it down, would not let them leave until their rings recorded fifty successful attempts. There had been a few minor splinchings of fingernails and eyelashes, but most of the students were successful. However, Twycross had ruined the mood of accomplishment by stating there was a difference between Apparating in a controlled environment such as the Great Hall versus the unknown of the testing environment which was typically fraught with nerves. There would be one last optional training in Hogsmeade next Saturday, and those who were of age would be able to take the exam the following Thursday before the start of the Easter holiday.

"Lily, do you think you could brew some of that muscle relaxer?" Keira had also fallen into bed but had at least removed her shoes first. Isabella and Jane murmured their agreement from their own beds.

"Why should I have to work while you three get to rest?" None of them answered. "It would be easier for us to finish off Jane's liqueur to dull the ache."

"Mmm, good idea," Keira mumbled. "Jane?"

"Yeah, yeah."

Lily heard Jane roll out of bed and rummage through her trunk. She then went to each girl's bedside table and poured a large amount into her water glass. When Jane reached Lily, she made a job of pouring the black cherry drink while the latter sat up to recline against her pillows. Jane handed her the glass without looking her and rushed to Isabella before Lily could thank her.

Such an exchange had been the norm since Lily caught Jane with Charlie Davies two months ago. Since then, Jane had made sure to never be alone with Lily in the same room, and when they did have to interact, Jane had not been able to meet her eyes. The one time Lily did catch Jane alone in their dormitory, Lily told her that she was not the one to judge Jane, but implored her to think about Mary and how she, Jane, would feel if she had found out that two people who she considered good friends had carried on as she and Charlie had while in her lonely sickbed. Jane had cried in what Lily believed was genuine shame and confusion, but it had not stopped her from continuing to see Charlie after curfew. During the last Hogsmeade visit, Charlie had used the Three Broomsticks fire to floo home and visit Mary. Lily was unsure what had transpired or if they officially broke up, but the next day, he and Jane were holding hands in public. At that point, Lily had found herself too jaded to get angry. No one else in the school seemed to have cared.

With a small frown, Lily gulped her drink in one and regretted it almost instantly. She had forgotten how horribly sweet the liqueur was.

"Better take it slow there, Keira," Jane said as she resumed her seat on her bed and drank straight from the bottle. "Or you'll never make it to James' party tonight."

Lily looked over at Keira, who appeared to have emptied her glass in the same manner as Lily had.

"I have hours to nap beforehand." She set her glass aside and lied back down. "You sure you don't want to come, Lily?"

"I wasn't invited."

Keira rolled her eyes. "No one was, explicitly at least. We're just supposed to show up."

Dorcas Meadows had made sure that every sixth and seventh year knew about the huge, grand birthday party Delilah was throwing for James later tonight in the Ravenclaw common room. Lily was sure that had Potter not been among the top three most popular guys in school, significantly fewer Ravenclaws would be so keen to risk getting into serious trouble and forfeiting points to host a party for someone of a different house, especially one who had captained such a crushing Quidditch defeat against them.

Lily knew that Delilah was hoping she wouldn't show up. She and Delilah had never been friends or enemies, but the latter had nothing but dirty or haughty looks for Lily since she and James began seriously dating, as if she had won something Lily had been coveting for so long. Lily hadn't thought much of it until this past Wednesday in Potions. Once she had known she'd have to work with Potter, Lily had resolved to acting civil, but when Delilah's glare had followed her to the Potter's work table, Lily had decided to give the idiot girl something to worry over. On top of that, she had caught Severus glowering between her and Potter, and Lily could not resist the opportunity to rile him up.

Knowing that Elias would be too aloof to notice, Lily had been friendlier with Potter than he had been expecting. It wasn't much, but she knew it was enough for him to think it flirting considering the absence of interaction between them over the last few months. Lily had noticed how he watched her intently as she tended to their potion, how his gaze trailed up her legs and to her chest when she removed her robes, how his breath halted when she brought her face to within inches of his. She had walked out of Potions feeling slightly rotten for giving him any attention, but with a smirk of smug satisfaction knowing that she still had an effect on him. As childish, vain, and inconsequential it sounded, there was something to be said for the confidence boost provided by knowing that the Quidditch god of Hogwarts still wanted you. And she had to admit, though with a scowl, that they had worked relatively well together.

"But honestly, if you ask me, it all reeks of desperation, doesn't it?"

Lily arched an eyebrow while Jane nodded.

"How do you mean?" Isabella asked.

Jane set her bottle down and removed her jumper. "This is Delilah Peterson we're talking about. Before last fall, no one outside of Ravenclaw knew who she was. She just happened to grow some breasts and learn some decent glamour charms over the summer and got lucky that James was the first to notice her. I don't think James is aware, but you see how she walks around like their king and queen of Hogwarts? This party is just to shove in every girl's face that James picked _her_."

_Like _he's_ some prize_, Lily thought crossly.

"So true," Keira said as she sat up again. "Grace was telling me in Astronomy just after the last Hogsmeade trip that Delilah, Dorcas, and Thalia got in a huge fight in the common room because they accused Delilah of constantly putting James before them. And then Delilah countered that they were just jealous they didn't have boyfriends. Only Marlene stood up for her."

"And I was in a cubicle in the fourth floor loo a few weeks ago, and she and Marlene walked in. I guess they assumed no one else was in there. Delilah was complaining about how she had hoped James would get her some jewelry for her birthday."

"And," Keira added, biting her lip as if unsure whether she should continue.

Jane waved an urging hand. "Go on!"

"They row _all the time_, according to Remus." Keira tried to suppress a grin. "Apparently over the stupidest things, too. But she always tries to hastily mend things and accept his apologies."

"So," Isabella began, looking somewhat bemused, "it sounds like the classic 'I'm lucky to have the popular guy as my boyfriend and will do whatever to keep him, even if he treats me like shit, because I'm insecure' situation." The other three laughed.

"Precisely, but I don't think James treats her like shit," Keira amended fairly. "I just don't think he's as interested in her as she is in him and wants him to be. From what Remus has said, he just does the bare minimum to keep her happy."

Isabella frowned in complete bewilderment now. "But if he's so bored and uninspired with her, then why even bother? No one's holding a wand to his throat."

With a mischievous grin, Jane glanced quickly at Lily, who squirmed, knowing what was coming.

"Isn't it obvious? He can't have what he really wants, so he'll take whatever distraction offers itself."

Before Wednesday, Lily would have not believed Potter was still attracted to her, but after listening to Keira and Jane's gossip, which was never wrong, she had to accept it. She had no idea that his and Delilah's relationship was as how her roommates had described it, but it did not affect her one way or the other. If Potter continued to pine for her, that was his problem. Other than last Wednesday, which in itself was completely harmless, she had done nothing to lead him on.

"I can't help it if I'm part of the reason for Potter's disinterest. Delilah chooses to put up with being just another notch on his bedpost for her own selfish reasons." And before she could stop herself, she gave Isabella a fleeting look. Potter and Black were one in the same in how they treated girls; she really didn't want Isabella to be a victim of such behavior.

"Oh, Lily, you're so dull sometimes," Jane said with a sad smile. "If I were in your shoes, I would love nothing more than to rub it in. She deserves a bit of stinksap to the face for the snotty attitude she's taken on lately."

Lily grinned despite herself. She _had_ given thought to showing up to the party tonight to see if Potter would spare her some attention and how Delilah would react. But then Elias, who certainly didn't care about the party, had mentioned that all of his roommates were planning to attend, meaning that his room would be free for them to continue making up for lost time.

"I would rather not waste any energy on her," Lily replied, trying to suppress the blush that had started at the thought of spending alone time with Elias. "I really don't understand why you all want to go in the first place."

"Sirius."

"Remus."

"It _is_ in Charlie's house, after all."

Lily rolled her eyes.

"Though Remus actually doesn't want to go," Keira said, looking to Isabella, who nodded.

"Neither does Sirius, nor Peter for that matter. But James practically begged them. They're only going for a little while, though, since they're throwing him a more intimate party just for the guys tomorrow night, as it's his actual birthday then."

"We're invited to join them later on in the night, by the way," Keira added.

Lily figured that invitation did not extend to her. "Well…hope it's a good time tonight. I'll be with Elias."

"I actually envy you," Keira said as she stood and walked to her wardrobe. She opened the doors and began sifting through her clothes, as if contemplating what to wear. "With everyone gone, tonight would be the perfect time to be alone with Remus."

Jane perked up. "Alone with Remus for what?"

"For exactly everything you're thinking and beyond."

"Are you two shagging?" Jane asked bluntly.

Keira turned to her, looking bored. "What do you think?"

Jane studied her for a moment. "Yes." Keira raised an eyebrow in question. "You may not hold hands in the corridors but that doesn't mean you're not holding his cock in the privacy of a broom closet."

Lily and Isabella's mouths fell open while Keira shrieked with laughter. She turned back to her wardrobe after she calmed down.

"Oh, Jane. I love your crass spin on things."

"You still haven't contradicted me though."

"And why bother? You're going to think what you want to think regardless. I'll divulge all the details of what's going on with Remus when I'm ready."

Jane bristled but said nothing. Lily hoped Keira would be ready sooner than later, as she had to admit that she too was interested in what was going on. But Lily realized that she too had been somewhat secretive about Elias at the beginning, though not for as long as Keira.

She glanced down at her trunk, thinking about what she might wear when she saw Elias. She was trying to picture how she would look in a black bra and knickers set she had recently purchased in Hogsmeade, but then figured it wouldn't matter since it'd end up on the floor anyways.

* * *

Hot tears streamed down Isabella's face, mixing with the pouring ice cold rain. She was kneeling at the foot of her mother's grave in the Jones' family compound just outside Nottingham, sobbing and shivering uncontrollably as the skies grew darker above her. She was wearing her Morgana Academy uniform, save for the Gryffindor tie at her neck, and was completely soaked through.

Isabella felt helpless, fearing that the tears would never stop. She was alone, as always, and when she tried to get up to leave the grave and the entire manor behind, to gain control of her emotions, an invisible weight kept her down. She couldn't move. Her eyes swept across the land around her, once so beautiful, green, and lush, and now lifeless, gloomy, and foreboding. Her grandmother's house, in which she had spent only a few holidays and where her mother had lived her childhood, looked as empty and uninviting as it always had. The headstones and tombs of countless dead relatives she had known only by name surrounded her; she felt no connection to them, no grief for them.

In the same manner as the rain had done, darkness suddenly and completely enveloped her. Before panic consumed her, though, the entire property was relit with an ominous green glow. Knowing what the source was, Isabella glanced up to find countless Dark Marks glittering beneath the rain clouds. Her attention was called back to her immediate surroundings as several masked men encircled and approached her. Terror swelled within her, but when an attempt to move failed again, she closed her eyes and resigned to her fate. Isabella apologized to her mother for disappointing her as the cold hand of a Death Eater closed around her neck.

With a sharp intake of breath, Isabella's eyes snapped open. She lifted a hand instinctively to her neck, panting slightly. She was in bed, lying on her side. The curtains were closed except for a small gap that revealed the east-facing window and a soft orange light that she assumed was from the dying fire. She looked at the clock; it was 3:15 AM. Her breathing slowed, and her eyelids grew heavy once more.

But as soon as she closed them, they were open again; she'd just realized that while it had the same perspective, this was not _her_ bed. It had taken her a minute to register that not only was she lying on her side, but she was also reclining against something hard and warm. She sat up hastily, regretted it when a dull pain throbbed at the back of her head, and saw that she had been lying on Sirius, positioned snugly between his legs. One of his arms had been wrapped around her back; the other was still resting on her hip. She felt only somewhat relieved when she noted they were fully dressed.

"You alright?"

Isabella jumped at the sound of Sirius' voice, scratchy and thick with sleep. She could hardly make out his features due to the low firelight but could tell his eyes were still closed.

"I don't understand how I got he—"

But then it hit her. It was Sunday night—well, now Monday morning—of James Potter's seventeenth birthday. She and Keira had joined the boys in their dormitory a little before 11:00; they were already sufficiently sloshed by then. They had all played a few games of Merlin's Cup and chatted; even Andy had joined them at one point.

Isabella remembered being extremely tired, mostly from Delilah's party the night before and a long day of catching up on homework. As such, she hadn't drank much and sincerely hoped she hadn't made a sloppy fool of herself. She wondered if the other boys knew she was now in Sirius' bed, and her face burned at the thought of what they would think of her if they did. As if they could see her now, she fully sat up so that she and Sirius were no longer touching.

"Don't worry; you didn't pass out from being too drunk or anything. You fell asleep against my shoulder while everyone was talking. Keira did too. I thought it would just be easier to put you in my bed while we continued on since I wouldn't be able to get you up to your own." He now sat up too, and as if he knew what she was thinking, he added, "I hope you don't think I put you here to try to take advantage—"

"I would never think that," Isabella said quickly. "I was just a little alarmed since I didn't remember, and—"

"And especially after the nightmare you just had?"

Isabella looked sharply at him. Her eyes had finally adjusted to the low light, and she could just make out his dark eyes watching her closely.

"You were tossing a bit; that's what woke me up. You settled after a minute, and then suddenly woke up." He silently scooted closer to her. "Is everything okay?"

Isabella knew Sirius was not referring only to right now, but to the last couple of days as well. She had been engaged in everything around her—classes, conversations, Apparition training—but had also been a bit distant, at times more obvious than others. It was no surprise that he had noticed, but this was the first time he brought it up. She knew she needed to tell him.

Biting her lip and willing herself not to cry, Isabella said, "It was this week a year ago that my mother was killed; I feel wretched, and my father's reminiscing letter on Tuesday only made things worse. I've been having nightmares since Wednesday night. Tonight, I fell apart at her grave before twenty Death Eaters surrounded me." A few tears escaped her eyes, and she wiped them away. "It just made me realize how little I visit her."

Sirius grabbed his wand from his bedside table and cast a Silencing charm around his bed before grabbing her hand and pulling her close to him again. He wrapped her arms around her, and she buried her face in his shoulder; she could smell firewhiskey on him.

"You can't beat yourself about that. It's not like you can pick up and head to the States whenever you want."

Isabella shook her head. "No. She's buried here on the family's property near Nottingham. I've only been twice since we moved. Once before school started and again over Christmas."

"Easter holiday is soon. I'm sure Derrick would be more than willing to take you."

"That's just it," Isabella said, her voice breaking a little. "I feel guilty going with him because he…he can't visit her. Since my relatives disappeared, the house and grounds have sort of…taken the measures to protect itself with some ancient security charms. Only Joneses related to the family by blood can enter. He hasn't been inside since her funeral."

Sirius released a heavy breath; it warmed her neck. "That's the most awful thing I've heard."

Isabella nodded silently. She remembered from their first trip the pained look on her father's face as he stood helplessly outside the gates, trying to control his competing rage and anguish. His grip on his wand was stiff; she knew part of him wanted to destroy the house of the people who had never fully accepted him, but the other part knew how fruitless it would be. At Christmas, Derrick handed her a wreath he had made of Estelle's favorite flowers before simply walking away.

"We should be able to Apparate by Easter break. We'll take the tunnel to Hogsmeade and leave from there. I won't be able to go inside with you either, but at least you won't feel the guilt as with your dad."

Isabella sat up and met Sirius' gaze with watery eyes. He was wearing an encouraging smile.

"You don't have to—I wasn't pressuring you to come with me," she said in a quiet voice.

"I know."

Emotion swelled in her chest. _This_ was the Sirius she had fallen for; the side she had sworn to her roommates really did exist whenever he was a little surlier than usual. Isabella had to admit that she grew frustrated at the times he was detached, but his attentiveness and compassion when they were alone made her feel like nothing else. They had only known each other for about seven months, and had been dating for less than two; there was still a lot to learn about each other. Things were not going to fall neatly into place as they had done with Lily and Elias or even Keira and Remus, which she had reminded them of on more than one occasion.

She leaned forward and kissed him softly on the lips. "Thank you." Pulling back, she sighed, "I should go."

But Sirius gently pulled her towards him again and nuzzled her neck. "Stay." His breath was hot against her ear.

Butterflies took flight in Isabella's stomach, her skin tingled in anticipation, but she tried to keep herself calm, as she had done over the past few weeks. It had hit her that she was exposing so much of herself to someone who she had known, again, for only seven months when it had taken a year for her to let Garret intimately touch her. Not that she didn't trust Sirius, but she had begun to feel uneasy at the thought of sex having such a control on her. So with much effort, she had reigned in her raging lust and slowed their physical progress.

Considering how quickly they were moving in their first few weeks together, they should have been having sex by now. As it were, Isabella had only touched Sirius inside his boxers to rub him off for the first time just a week ago. Sirius had definitely noticed their slower pace, was frustrated by it, but so far he had been patient with her.

"I'm not looking for a wank or anything…well, maybe I am, but I mainly just want you next to me." He was now running his lips up her neck and along her jaw. His hands were on her hips again and pulling her into his lap, but she stopped him there.

"Sirius," Isabella sighed as she moved out of his reach, "I have to be up in four hours, and it's going to be hard enough in my own bed without having you as a temptation next to me in here." He pouted, and she tried not to smile. She considered her own desire before adding, "I'll make it up to you after class tomorrow."

"Promise?"

She leaned forward and sucked on his bottom lip before kissing him soundly on the mouth. "Promise," she whispered against his lips. She then stood up from the bed and opened his curtains before facing him. "Goodnight."

"Night," he said flatly.

Isabella turned and headed out the room to avoid giving into his pouting lips, but not before she noticed the many empty liquor bottles, stray playing cards, and candy wrappers strewn across the floor. The other boys' beds were completely guarded by their curtains.

A minute later, Isabella was tiptoeing about her own dormitory getting ready for bed. Though she hadn't drank much, she feared a hangover ruining her day, so she drank two full glasses of water before changing into her pajamas. It wasn't until she was under her duvet that she noticed Keira's bed was empty and still perfectly made from this morning. Grinning, she pulled her hangings closed. She would have to remember to tease Keira in the morning.

It felt like only ten minutes had passed when her alarm went off at 7:30. Isabella groaned and tapped it with her wand to shut it up. It started again seven minutes later, and the cycle continued until 8:00 when she knew she was risking it. She sat up and was relieved her head wasn't as heavy as it could have been, but she still felt incredibly groggy. On a positive note, she hadn't had another nightmare.

Knowing it was going to take a longer than normal shower to get her feeling and looking somewhat decent, she opened her curtains, stood, and stretched.

"It's about time!"

Isabella spun around and saw Keira sitting in on her bed in her dressing gown and brushing back her wet hair.

"I was going to blow your clock to bits if you let it go off one more time."

Isabella grinned and sat on the other side of her bed to face Keira. "And exactly when did _you_ get in this morning?"

"You know?"

"Mmhmm. I didn't think much of Remus' closed curtains when I left the guys' room, but when I saw your empty bed when I got back, I put two and two together."

"You fell asleep in Sirius' bed?"

Isabella nodded. "But I woke up around 3:30, freaking out a bit. I didn't remember."

"Me neither," Keira said in a low voice, glancing back at the door leading to the bathroom. "I woke up around 5:00." There was a glint in Keira's eye that Isabella noticed right away.

"What happened?"

Keira blushed and looked again towards the bathroom.

"Jane?"

She nodded. "Lily's already at breakfast."

"Quickly then!"

"He asked me to be his girlfriend," she blurted, grinning from ear to ear. "I said 'Yes' obviously, but I was so surprised."

"Really? It's been almost three months though."

"I know, but this is Remus. It's hard to explain since you haven't known him as long, but believe me, it's a big deal."

Isabella laughed. "I'll take your word for it." She then cleared her throat and gave Keira a cheeky grin. "So…did you take advantage of your privacy?"

Blood rushed into Keira's cheeks. "He's always been so hesitant with me, but this morning he made up for it. His hands were _all over me_… so attentive and thorough. Let's just say I enjoyed it." She fidgeted a bit. "He wouldn't let me touch him though, saying this was all too new and he really needed to take it step by step. It was irritating but only for a second because I was on another planet."

"When did you get in?"

"I dragged myself back over around 6:00, slept for an hour, and got up after I heard Lily getting dressed." She eyed Isabella skeptically. "Why didn't you stay with Sirius?"

Isabella shrugged. "Knew it would be difficult to refrain from temptation when we woke up."

"And what's so terrible about giving into temptation?"

They both turned at the new voice. Jane was strolling out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped tightly around her body and another within her hair.

_Nothing, if you don't care for your dignity_, Isabella thought harshly. She knew it wasn't her place to say anything to Jane after finding out about her and Charlie Davies, but Isabella could think of nothing more incredibly selfish and despicable.

She and Keira shared a look that signaled their conversation was over. Keira reached for her wand to finish her hair while Isabella grabbed her robe and headed for the bathroom.

After a long, hot shower in which she wondered about what she and Sirius might have gotten into had she stayed behind, Isabella rushed to get dressed and found that she had only fifteen minutes to maybe cram a piece of toast down her throat and get to class. With only one arm in her school robes, she grabbed her bag and ran down the stairs. Only a few other last-minute stragglers were in the common room.

She reached the Entrance Hall a few minutes later, which was full of students. There was a palpable, unpleasant, and harried energy among them all. A few people stared at her as she headed into the Great Hall, which was mostly empty. The students still present were huddled in groups pouring over what looked like _The Daily Prophet_. The anxiety she had felt in the Entrance Hall only intensified.

As Isabella came upon the Gryffindor table, she found Lily sitting with Emmeline Vance. When she reached them, they both looked up at her with grievous expressions. Without knowing why, she then scanned the table for Sirius. He wasn't there, and neither were James, Remus, and Peter for that matter; nor had they been in the Entrance Hall or common room. Not wanting to waste time asking questions, she reach down for a discarded copy of the paper. She was just straightening it out when she heard her name.

"Miss Williams!"

"Isabella!"

Looking around, Isabella saw McGonagall rushing towards her from the high table. And if her mind wasn't playing tricks on her, that was her father following closely behind. She did a double take and dropped the paper.

"_Dad_?"

Derrick did not greet her. "You haven't read the paper yet, have you?"

"No."

"Good," he said, looking only a little relieved. "Come on, we need to talk. Minerva, could you show us to somewhere more private?"

"Of course. Follow me."

Isabella's heart was beating rapidly as she fell instep with her father. She looked back at Lily, her eyebrows raised, but Lily only bit her lip and shook her head. Isabella was sure there were tears glimmering in her eyes.

Students openly stared between Isabella and her father as they followed McGonagall led them into and through the Entrance Hall. It wasn't everyday that parents just showed up at Hogwarts, and she would have been more embarrassed if she weren't frightened at the thought that something dire had obviously occurred. McGonagall was just showing them into an empty classroom when the first bell for class rang.

"This should be suitable. It is never used." McGonagall then made to close the door. "I'll set a locking charm, and will be in Albus' office when you're done."

"Thank you, Minerva." Derrick set an Imperturbable charm on the door as it closed for good measure, then turned to his daughter.

"I'd be happier to see you if I weren't so sure you're going to give me bad news," she said. She was cut off from saying more when he pulled her into a hug, his arms tightening around her like a vice. She returned the gesture, and when it looked as if he planned to never let go, Isabella stepped back from the embrace, but he held onto her arms.

Her father looked extremely haggard. The grey hairs on his crown were plentiful, his eyes were bordered with dark circles, and he was considerably thinner. His dark cargo pants and polo shirt were very wrinkled.

"Are you okay?"

Isabella scrunched her face in confusion. "Yes. Should I not be?"

"No one tried to…hurt you or ambush you or anything last night?"

Her eyes went wide. "No, I was in Gryffindor Tower from dinner on." Her heart beat a little faster, wondering where this was headed. "A few of us got together to celebrate James' birthday." Derrick released a relieved breath. "What's going on?"

"There's no easy way to say this," he began as he sat upon a desk; Isabella took a seat. "There was an attack last night. Well, I should say numerous attacks, all coordinated to make the biggest impact. They were what we call a 'statement attack.'"

Isabella made to speak, but her father shook his head.

"The Death Eaters went after people with close ties to those leading the fight against them—the Minister, Head Auror, Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot, a few senior department directors, and even the Muggle Prime Minister."

"And _you_?"

"And me," he confirmed with a grave expression.

A severe shiver shook her body. "But who…" She trailed off, immediately thinking of her aunt Annette and other relatives in New York.

"Your grandmother Adela, your uncles Marlon and Dayne and their wives, and your cousin Imelda—I'm so sorry, Isabella, but they're dead."

"_What_?" Isabella's heart gripped painfully, and her eyes filled with tears. She was never that close to her mother's side of the family, but she had hoped to see them again after all this madness was over. Much could be said of their appalling behavior, but at the end of the day, they were still the only connection to her mother. "But how? There's been no trace of them."

"They've been in Ireland this whole time," Derrick said, trying to keep the emotion out of his voice, "and the Death Eaters tracked them down, barged into the house, and…yeah." He grabbed Isabella's hand and squeezed.

Isabella was wiping her tears away with the sleeve of her robes when a thought hit her. He had said nothing of her two other cousins, Calvin, who graduated over two years ago, and Imelda's younger sister, Mariah. "And Calvin and Mariah?"

"Their beds happened to be at the back of the house. When Calvin heard the commotion at the front, he grabbed Mariah, the closest to him, and ran for the portkey."

"And left the others behind? But that's—"

"What he had been told to do," Derrick said loudly over her. "Your grandmother and uncles knew they might be targeted and instructed Calvin to do what he needs to save himself and the girls if they were ever in danger. The girls are not of age, and the fact that they are out of school means they are not consistently trained. Someone would have to care for them. He had to be strong and leave his parents to fight without a look back. It's just a shame he couldn't save Imelda as well."

Isabella shook her head as tears continued to fall, not wanting to believe any of it. It was as if she had never woken up; this all still had to be a nightmare. After a couple of deep breaths, she was able to control her voice again.

"And how do you know all of this, about the portkey?"

"Because I am the one who gave it to them," he said softly. "I've known where they've been this entire time. Don't get upset with me, but I didn't tell you because I didn't want to worry yourself over it, and, also, you could have potentially been targeted by someone who wanted to know their whereabouts."

Isabella frowned but nodded in understanding. She jumped when the second bell rang.

"After you started school, I visited them and gave them an unregistered portkey, inviting them to use it whenever they needed a safe place to return. They grudgingly accepted it, knowing it would be useful for the kids at they very least if they ever found themselves in a situation where the adults would not be able to protect them. Like tonight. Calvin and Mariah landed in the study at our home in London at around 2:30 this morning. I had just left on a call from the Minister to investigate the break-in at his house. Nonie had to call me back."

"Okay," Isabella said slowly, trying to sort everything in her head, "what about the Minister?"

"Minister Stotch and his wife were lucky. He happened to be working late at the Ministry, probably due to a report initiated by a spy, but that is neither here nor there. The protection charms around his home are the most powerful we have, and they change at random. We're guessing one of Voldemort's spies in the Ministry got hold of the counter-charms but was unaware that they changed at 10:00 last night. The Death Eaters that tried to enter his home to get to his wife were bound and gagged with anti-Apparition charms, and the Ministry was notified right away. They're now being questioned."

"And everyone else?"

Derrick was silent for a moment while he thought. "They got to the wife and two grandsons, who happened to be visiting, of the head of Magical Law Enforcement; they're dead. The house of the Department of Mysteries director was set aflame, but no one was home."

"You mentioned Mr. Potter."

Her father's face darkened; Isabella felt her heart clench again.

"Edward was kept late at the office as well, so Clarice made plans to have Sunday dinner with a family friend. They got to her as she was on her way home."

Isabella clapped her hand over her mouth. "She's dead?"

"No, no," Derrick said quickly. "Edward found a note left at his home. They abducted her…to use her as leverage. They'd get nothing if she were dead."

"Then why did—"

"The Death Eaters killed Adela and the rest to show their power; they'd have no use for them otherwise because they assumed that I wouldn't sacrifice anything to save them. As terrible as it sounds, some targets are worth more than others. Had they gotten to the wives of the Minister or Department of Mysteries director, they wouldn't have killed them either."

"So Mrs. Potter…?"

Derrick shrugged and shook his head. "I don't know any updates. As soon as he filed the appropriate reports at the Ministry, Edward came here because he felt James deserved to know in person. I decided to come along because I felt the same regarding your grandmother. We've been here since 7:00. I've been waiting for you to come down to breakfast."

At those words, Isabella experienced a moment of selfish relief, thanking the heavens that she had the aptitude to get back to her own bed this morning. She couldn't imagine the embarrassment had she woken up to Mr. Potter telling James that Death Eaters had abducted his mother. It most certainly would have made its way back to her father, and she'd probably be on the receiving end of the 'sex talk' on top of everything else.

But then she thought of James, and despair consumed her. It was everything she had gone through just a year ago, except he was informed that his mother was missing, whereas she had not been. She had been angry with her father for not telling her anything until Estelle was dead, but now she couldn't decide which was worse. She couldn't imagine spending every waking—and probably sleeping—minute agonizing over the unknown, on the chance of never seeing her mother again.

"It's mom all over again," she whispered.

"I know, I know." Derrick grabbed her hand again to get her attention. "I don't know James well, if he's the type to elicit support from others through tough times, but if you can think of anything comforting to say…I'm sure you are among very few who can really empathize with him."

Isabella couldn't think of what she could possibly say to James; everything would feel so trite, but she promised Derrick that she would try.

"That's all I ask."

"So what does all this mean? What do you think they're trying to get?"

"For the Minister to step aside; Voldemort's ultimate goal is to take control of the Ministry so he can enact his plans under the guise of improving the Wizarding community. This latest attack offers both good and bad news. The bad news is that the Death Eaters had enough resources to carry out an assault of such a large scale. The good is that they believed those resources not sufficient enough to start fights with those that they really wanted—Minister Stotch, Edward, myself, and so on. Also, their research was not as thorough as I'm sure they had hoped. I'm sure the person who didn't account for the Minister's protection charms changing is hiding out on his own now, wanting to escape Voldemort's wrath."

Everything was now going in one ear and out the other. Isabella's brain was only concerned with the facts that her mother's family was dead and that James' mother was missing.

Derrick glanced at his watch. "Isabella, dear, I'm sorry to have dumped all of this on you, but I have to run. With Edward as distracted as he is, I'm going to have to takeover a lot of the coordination of missions. We've halted the training of junior Aurors and new recruits; it's now more important to get our senior Aurors up to date with all the latest defense and counter-spying techniques. We're having a quick talk with Dumbledore regarding school safety and then I have to head back to the office."

He stood and pulled Isabella into another hug. "One last thing, though. I know that had you been more easily accessible, the Death Eaters would have come after _you_ to get to me. You are not in any serious danger while Dumbledore is here, but there are some students here who are sons and daughters of these Death Eaters and follow that example. Just please watch your back, and promise me that you won't wander off alone among the school and grounds at odd hours. I would prefer it if you didn't go to Hogsmeade anymore, but I can't ask that of you, and it doesn't seem too bad if there are hundreds of students and adult wizards and witches around."

Isabella nodded and stepped back. "I promise, Dad."

"Alright." He sighed, looking as if he didn't want to let her go again. "Point me to Dumbledore's?"

They headed towards the door. The corridor outside was empty. Isabella pointed up the marble staircase.

"It's on the second floor, or the third floor really—you know the whole ground floor thing here. And then you remember the gargoyle right?" Derrick nodded. "The password should be Ice Mice, but I'm sure he'll be aware of your coming either way."

He gripped her shoulders and kissed her forehead. "Stay safe, stay alert. I'll write you soon about the services for…you'll want to come, right?"

"Of course."

"Okay. They'll probably be later this week," Derrick said heavily. "And as for Easter, I think it would be safest for you to stay here. If you want to visit for a day or two—"

"It's okay. I understand."

"I'm so sorry to put you through all of this." He kissed her on the forehead again. "You'll hear from me soon."

"Bye, Dad."

He gave her one last squeeze before turning and racing up the staircase.

She stood alone in corridor for a long, quiet moment, unsure of what to do. She wanted to scream, to run, to collapse and cry her eyes out.

"Isabella?"

She jumped and spun around. Sirius was standing at the far end of the hall, peering out from behind a tapestry.

"Goddamnit, Sirius," she breathed, clutching at her chest. With the news of deaths and abductions, her nerves were taut with anxiety. "What are you doing there?"

"Waiting for your father to leave."

Sirius began making his way toward her, and that was when Isabella noticed his appearance. He looked like he could have been anyone on the street—no robes, no tie, no jumper. His school shirt and pants were terribly wrinkled. He looked as if he hadn't slept past when she'd left his bed only hours ago.

"How did you know we were here?"

"I was coming down the stairs looking for you when I saw McGonagall leading you and your father to the classroom, so I decided to wait." He reached for her hand and led her back into the same room, and like her father, cast an Imperturbable charm on the closed door. "Is everything okay?"

"No, but right now I'm more concerned about James' mother. How is he doing?"

Sirius looked away as he sat down. "He's doing as well as you could expect."

"Shouldn't you be with him? I mean, doesn't he want company?"

He shook his head, still looking away. "James is the type of person who likes solitude for a while. When his dad left, he put on his invisibility cloak and wandered off. He'll come fetch me when he's ready to talk."

"But why are you—" And then it hit her, and she couldn't believe she could be so stupid and ignorant. Mrs. Potter was like a second mother to Sirius. She walked over to him, sat on his lap, and forced him to look at her. His eyes were slightly red. "I just realized—how are _you_ doing?"

"Fine."

"_Sirius_," she said insistently. "Be vulnerable with me for just one minute and then you can resume your manly facade."

The corner of his mouth twitched before his expression hardened again. "Honestly, I'm terrified, absolutely just…bloody fucking hell, it's such a mess." He ran his hands roughly over his face, and Isabella knew he was trying to hide the tears that had welled in his eyes. A quiet moment passed before he continued.

"It's just that Clarice and Edward are already older. He was going to retire this year had this Voldemort conflict not exploded like it did, so he stayed on the basis of, you know, not changing hippogriffs midstream and all. This stress can't be good for him, and Clarice…whatever they're doing to her, she—" Sirius looked up her apologetically "—your mum was young, quick; Clarice may not be able to endure days of endless…

"And then James. He doesn't have much family besides his parents—mainly older distant cousins sprinkled throughout Europe. What do you say to him? Every word of comfort sounds like bollocks. Not even Remus knew what to say."

"It would seem that way, but from experience, just knowing someone took the time to offer a few words is comforting. Nothing anyone says is going to make him forget what's going on, so don't have that mentality. Just be honest."

Sirius nodded absently, staring at the floor. "How did you do it? How were you able to continue functioning, knowing your mum was being held by Voldemort?"

"Simple," Isabella said, with a bit more levity than she wanted. Sirius snapped his head up at her. "I didn't. Something I still really haven't forgiven my dad for, though I know it's senseless to hold such a grudge, is how he ran off to find my mother without telling me. I had no idea anything was going on—not that she had been captured and tortured, Voldemort trying to bargain her life for her work—until my dad showed up at Morgana with the news that she was dead." Tears sprang to her eyes again, and she grew impatient at how emotionally raw this morning had made her. "I was trying to determine what was worse—the absolute knowledge of death or the knowledge that she's out there alive somewhere with a glimmer of hope that she could be found but being unable to do anything to help, knowing she was being hurt, waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"Edward said something about your grandmother," Sirius said suddenly, sounding as if he didn't want to talk about Clarice anymore.

"Yeah…she's dead." And Isabella told him everything her father had relayed, about them hiding in Ireland, the Death Eaters tracking them down, the portkey, Calvin and Mariah.

"So your cousins are still at your house?"

"I have no idea. God, I didn't even ask about them, but I would assume so. Either way, I'll see them at the end of the week." The thought made her slightly uneasy. She hadn't seen them since her mother's funeral. Since her and her father's arrival in England last summer, there had been nothing but ill feelings.

"Who thought the day would turn out like this?"

She shook her head. "And I had been worried over a stupid nightmare."

"Maybe it was an omen."

Isabella chuckled humorlessly.

"Were you excused from classes today?"

"Does it matter?"

"Then let's get out of here." He glanced up at her with an entreating expression. "To Hogsmeade, just for a couple of hours. I don't think I can stand the gloating looks of Dolohov and the rest of them, the endless whispers from everyone else."

She smiled sadly. "I would love to, but I promised my dad I wouldn't wander out of bounds. He's overcautious, I know, but with everything going on…"

"It's alright. I understand."

Isabella knew he was disappointed, so she suggested the Room of Requirement. "Maybe we can request a warm California beach."

Sirius' face brightened at the prospect but then he shook his head. "As much I would love to see you sunbathing in a bikini, though preferably topless—" she flicked his ear "—time would slip away from us in there, and I would rather be around when James shows up."

"Okay." She thought for a moment. "It's not as fun as the first two ideas, but I didn't get all of my work done yesterday and know that you didn't even start. So, why don't we hole ourselves in your dormitory and work on our assignments. We'll keep each other company until James returns, and then I'll leave you be."

With a sigh, Sirius nodded. "I think that's our smartest option. Though I will warn you, I plan on taking many study breaks." His hand ran under her skirt and caressed her thigh as he covered her mouth with his own. Isabella shivered at his touch as he deepened the kiss. She questioned the appropriateness and selfishness of such action on a day so full of strife, but she could not deny the need for a distraction.

"Let's try to make it to your room first," Isabella said breathlessly after pulling away. She rose up from Sirius' lap and fetched her schoolbag while he waited at the door.

Ten minutes later, they were in his dormitory, and Isabella didn't feel as awkward as she had anticipated. The room was empty; Peter, Remus, and Andy had gone to class. Instead of grabbing his books, though, Sirius went straight to his unmade bed and climbed in.

"What?" he asked at Isabella's reproving look. "I haven't slept since you left this morning. I'm going to have a bit of a lie-in. Join me whenever if you wish." He grinned at her before turning over.

Isabella, who had settled herself at his desk, bit her lip as she watched him situate himself within his covers. She had to admit she was tired herself, but that damn temptation would keep them from getting any sleep. Her father's disapproving face flashed across her mind, and without another thought, she opened her Herbology book and took out a quill. A glance at her watch told her it was 10:00. If she got enough done, she would reward herself with a break in an hour.

_A break_, she warned herself, _that could not last an hour itself._


	19. Love Will Never Do Without You

**A/N: This chapter contains adult content.**

* * *

With a glance at the clock on the mantle piece, Isabella fell into a plush chair with a deep sigh.

"Yeah, me too."

Isabella looked over at her cousin, Calvin, across the sitting room and smiled. "I'm exhausted."

Isabella's day had begun much too early. She had been originally set to leave school Friday afternoon immediately after classes, but the Ministry had not been able to secure a safe Floo connection between Hogwarts and her home until just before midnight. When she arrived, she stayed up chatting with Derrick for a while before retiring to bed for only five very agitated hours of sleep. This morning had been spent setting up for her grandmother's, uncles', their wives', and Imelda's funerals and reuniting with her cousins, Calvin, who appeared composed considering everything that had happened, and Mariah, who was still in shock, spoke very little, and had retreated to bed early after crying most of the day.

It was now just after 8:30 PM, and they had just seen the last guest out of the door. After the services, there had been a wake and dinner at her and Derrick's home in London. Only 20 people, the ones closest to the Jones' family, had shown up for the days' events, but several dozens more had sent cards and messages of consolation and sympathy.

"People are afraid to gather in large crowds, especially something tied to Voldemort and his actions, fearing it might become a target," her father had explained this morning when Isabella expressed bewilderment at the small turnout.

"So where are you going to go from here?" Isabella asked Calvin as she kicked off her formal black heels and unclasped her dress robes. They had been quiet for several minutes, finally able to absorb and contemplate the magnitude and meaning of the day.

Calvin started at the sound of her voice and sat up straight from his slumped position. "Lay low here for a few days for a start. I was thinking of trying to find work, maybe even at the Ministry under your father as an assistant until everything died down and I would be able to enter a formal program, but he pointed out that Mariah would be here alone. Even with Nonie around, it would be quite lonely, especially after everything that's happened."

"True. I know I would go crazy."

"Exactly. Plus there's still the chance that those Death Eaters are still after us. Mariah hasn't had any magical training to defend herself if the worst happened. So, Derrick suggested that we head to the States. Your aunt Annette offered to take us in. I'd be free to apply to any program I want, while she trained Mariah on the magical basics until she's able to start school this fall. She'll be going to Morgana, which is where you went, right?"

"Yeah," Isabella said, nodding and thinking back to the beautiful manor at which she still longed to be. "I think that's the best idea given the circumstances."

"Me too. She'll be a year behind, but if we stayed here, she wouldn't be able to start school at all."

"Mariah will love Morgana. I'll write my friends and ask them to keep an eye out for her." Isabella knew Lana and Jasmine would more than oblige, and she thought of maybe writing Garret and asking him to talk to Sonia and Serena to look over her as well since they were the same age and would only be a year ahead.

"That would be most gracious," Calvin said with an easy smile. "Thanks."

She waved a dismissive hand. "Isn't that what family's for?"

Their eyes met, and they shared a knowing grin before Calvin's eyes shifted to fire, unseeing. Isabella watched him for a few minutes, trying not to feel pity, but unable to avoid it.

It just wasn't fair. Calvin had just turned 20 and been brought up from the Tutshill Tornadoes reserve team before being forced into hiding. He was handsome and charming; he should have been free to enjoy his days with his friends, his impending celebrity, his time as a bachelor. Instead, he had lost most of his family, forced to pickup and start a new life in a new country, looking after a cousin who seemed like she would be forever inconsolable.

The door to the sitting room opened; Isabella jumped and looked around.

"Hey," her father said as he entered, carrying a tray of what looked like hot cocoa. He still had not grown accustomed to having tea all the time, no matter how often and insistently her mother had served it back home.

"Thanks," she said as she took a mug and a cautious sip. It relaxed her instantly. "Minister gone?"

"Yeah, just left." He handed Calvin a mug before taking the last and sitting in the chair closest to the fire. "And I just received an owl from the Floo office. Your connection back to Hogwarts is set for 11:00. I'd prefer to Apparate you myself, but we'd be vulnerable waiting outside the gates. Traveling internally is much safer."

Isabella nodded but said nothing. Honestly, she felt like her dad was taking things a bit too seriously, as if Death Eaters were lurking around every corner to get to _her_. She really wasn't that special or important, but she could understand her father's apprehension. With what was left of her mother's family soon leaving, they were truly alone now.

"Where's Mariah?"

"She went to bed," Calvin answered.

"She okay?"

"I gave her some of the calming draught you made a few days ago."

Derrick sighed. "I think once she gets out of here she'll be a little better."

"Aunt Annette will take great care of her," Isabella tried to assure her father. "And she'll love Morgana. I'm planning to write Garret, Lana, and Jasmine. They'll look after her."

"Wonderful idea."

Isabella finished her cocoa and stood. "Where's Benjy?"

"I suspect he's in the kitchen still after bringing the note from the Ministry. Why?"

"Need to get a quick note to Hogwarts."

Her father gave her a questioning look, but she just smiled and headed for the kitchen. Benjy was eating mixed nuts out of a bowl on the island when she entered. He hooted in greeting before turning back to his treats. She found paper and a quill in a utility drawer and sat at the table.

_Sirius,_

_I'll be returning to Hogwarts tonight around 11:00. Can you meet me in McGonagall's study? I'm sure she won't mind you being out after curfew if it's for such a chivalrous deed._

_See you soon,_

_Isabella_

Isabella folded the note and strode over to Benjy. "Sorry, to interrupt," she said, stroking his feathers. "I need you to take this to Hogwarts, and rather quickly. Deliver it to Sirius Black. He should be in the Gryffindor common room. No need to wait for a response."

Benjy clicked his beak in understanding as she tied the letter to his left leg. She then went to the window over the sink and opened it just in time as Benjy zoomed past her.

"Is there a specific reason why you want this Sirius to meet you?"

Isabella nearly jumped out of her skin at her father's voice for the second time that night. She turned to see Derrick standing at the kitchen door with the drinks tray.

"Uh, I don't like to wander the castle alone, which you've also warned me against," Isabella said, trying to keep her face impassive, but it was impossible with that annoying smirk on Derrick's face.

"But you could have just as easily asked Lily or um…uh, Keira." Isabella said nothing. "Is this the same Sirius who lives with the Potters?"

"Yes."

Derrick scrutinized her as he approached the sink and set the tray down. "And are you two dating?"

Heat rose to Isabella's cheeks. "Yes." She braced herself for the barrage of questions.

"Hmm."

Isabella raised her eyebrows. "That's it?"

Derrick chuckled as he rinsed the mugs. "Would you like me to give you the third degree, then?"

"Not particularly; I'm just a little shocked."

"Well, I trust your judgment," Derrick said with a shrug. "I know you wouldn't choose to be with some jerk. Besides, if the Potters like him enough to take him in, he can't be too bad."

"Uh huh, but you had known Garret practically since he was born, yet you and mom talked my ear off for about an hour when you found out about us dating."

"You were also fifteen at the time, and he was your first boyfriend. There was a lot to, er, discuss about the intricacies of relationships. But we can have a another sit down if you—"

"No, that's okay!" Isabella said quickly. She remembered the summer day her parents found out about her and Garret much too well. They had sat her down to talk about hormones and boundaries and smart decisions until discomfort had driven Derrick from the room. Her mother had then proceeded, without Derrick's knowledge, to teach Isabella how to brew birth control potion, which Estelle said was more effective than the Contraceptive Charm, but which she also taught to be used in emergencies. Of course, Isabella had used neither since then, but she had a feeling she would be putting that knowledge to practice sooner than later.

Derrick chuckled again but immediately sobered. "How did Sirius take the news about Clarice?"

"Not so well, but better than James."

"How's he been?"

"Not good at all. He's a typically gregarious guy, really outgoing and everything, but he's been silent and reserved all week. Sirius says he's the type that doesn't like to talk much when he's upset." She then glanced at her father. "Has there been any news about Mrs. Potter?"

"Nothing I can tell you. There have been a few updates, but it's best that you don't know anything. I don't think Edward has even said anything to James. It's just safer that way."

Isabella thought that was easy for her father to say seeing as how he also hadn't said a word to her about her mother, but she refrained from pointing this out.

"So how are you feeling about Apparition?" Derrick asked suddenly, conspicuously changing the subject. "Think you're ready for your test this Thursday?"

"I've done it successfully quite a few times. I missed the extra practice today, but I think I'll be okay."

"Good, good. It'll make traveling much easier once you're licensed."

Isabella nodded.

"And then Easter break. Were you thinking of coming home?"

"You said it would be safer for me to remain at Hogwarts." She swallowed before continuing, already feeling guilty. "I was hoping to maybe visit mom."

Derrick shut off the tap and looked sharply at her. "On your own?"

"No. Sirius said he would accompany me." Isabella would have preferred to keep this plan from her father but knew it was more prudent to tell him. She had a feeling the Jones' home was being monitored and that he would somehow find out anyways.

"I see." His face was blank, and his tone was flat. "And you were planning on Apparating?"

She nodded again.

"From where?"

"There's a Hogsmeade visit the first Saturday of break," Isabella explained, but she knew to keep quiet about the fact that she and Sirius planned to go on a different day. "We can Apparate from there. We're free to do our own thing just as long as we're back by the end of day."

Her father frowned. "I don't like the idea of you two going alone, but you're of age, so I can't stop you. And you do deserve to visit…just be careful, okay? I do appreciate you being honest about it, though, and not sneaking off."

"It did cross my mind," Isabella said, trying to bring some levity to the situation, "but I have a feeling you have a couple of junior Aurors tailing me outside of Hogwarts without my knowledge."

Derrick smiled but said nothing as he turned away. Isabella rolled her eyes.

"You should get your things together, dear. Don't want to miss the connection."

Isabella nodded and made her way upstairs. She had only brought a small overnight bag, but somehow her things had spread themselves all over her room and bathroom in the short time. It was just unavoidable when she was in her own space. She changed into jeans and a sweatshirt, packed her bag, and brought it with her downstairs to the sitting room, where Calvin and Derrick were sipping on what smelled like gin.

They chatted about what seemed like everything but the obvious events of the day, which Isabella, and, she suspected, Calvin, appreciated. She kept an eye on the clock, wishing for time to go by faster. It had been such an emotionally draining day, and she was just eager to leave this sad environment behind.

And of course, she was anxious to see Sirius. The past week had been a tough one with Sirius shifting erratically between irritability, surliness, and reticence, and Isabella had done her best to be patient considering the reason for his capriciousness. However, she selfishly hoped that he was just as anxious to see her to put his sullen mood aside for a couple of hours.

When the clock read 10:57, the flames in the fireplace transformed from orange to green.

"Ah, here we go," Derrick said, standing up and grabbing Isabella's bag.

Calvin stood and gave her a hug.

"Good luck with everything in the States. Keep me updated."

"Of course, and thanks for everything with Mariah. Stay safe."

"You too."

Her father then pulled her into to his usual vice-like hug. "Good luck with Apparition. And please keep everything in mind I told you earlier this week. Let me know if you do go to Nottingham."

"Of course. Love you, Dad."

"You too, dear. Quickly, now." He helped her into the hearth before handing her the bag.

Special secured Floo connections didn't need a command, so Isabella braced herself for the spinning. She waved solemnly to Derrick and Calvin as her sitting room whirled out of focus, but she couldn't help the large grin that soon spread across her lips at the thought of being in Sirius' arms again.

* * *

Sirius smoothed his shirt before clearing his throat and knocking soundly on the door.

"Come in," called a brisk voice.

Sirius entered the study of the Gryffindor Head of House, who was expectedly surprised to see him. She stood up from her desk and removed her reading glasses.

"Yes, Mr. Black? Is something the matter?"

"No, not at all, Professor," Sirius answered quickly. Late night calls like this were typically associated with troublemaking, but nowadays they were linked to more dangerous acts. "Isabella is arriving soon, so I came to escort her back to Gryffindor Tower."

The corner of McGonagall's mouth twitched slightly before it set again. "I see, but you still are out after curfew, Mr. Black."

His mouth fell open, wondering how he would get out of this one. McGonagall was the only female teacher who did not fall for his charm. He made to speak, but McGonagall continued over him.

"But I think I can overlook it this one time for such a courteous act."

Sirius smirked. Isabella had been right, though he feared McGonagall still finding reason to punish him.

"You may wait," she said, gesturing to a seat in front of her desk.

Sirius reluctantly walked towards it, but he was saved from a long awkward wait by the fire, which suddenly burned green. Isabella soon appeared, spinning in place. It took another minute for her to slow down and gain her bearing. When she was finally still, she grabbed the mantle and looked up. Their eyes met, and she smiled; Sirius smiled back, truly pleased to see her. It had been a long day and even longer week with a despondent best friend and no update on the status of Clarice. He needed this distraction.

"Good evening, Professor," Isabella said, shifting her gaze to McGonagall.

"Hello, Miss Williams," McGonagall greeted. "I hope your visit home was agreeable despite the reason for the occasion."

"As much as could be expected."

"And how is your cousin Calvin?"

"Doing well despite everything that's happened."

Sirius smirked again. It was not a shock to hear McGonagall's concern over her favorite Gryffindor Quidditch player from the past few years.

"Good to hear, good to hear," McGonagall replied absently as she shuffled through papers on her desk. "Alright, you two. Straight to Gryffindor Tower. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Professor," Sirius and Isabella said together. He grabbed her bag but refrained from holding her hand.

Once they were in the corridors and a couple of floors above McGonagall's study, Isabella spoke.

"I don't want to go to the common room just yet; don't want to see anyone and deal with any questions right now. It's just been such a long day." She looked beseechingly at him, and it was then he noticed her slumped shoulders and tired eyes.

"I had a suspicion that would be the case," he said, finally grabbing her hand.

When they reached the seventh floor, Sirius led her away from the Fat Lady and to the corridor with Barnabas the Barmy instead. He walked back and forth three times, imagining a quiet room to relax. He thought about maybe adding a bed, but worried it would seem too presumptuous. Sirius opened the door and let Isabella enter first.

"Perfect," she sighed.

Sirius followed closely behind to find a comfortably warm space with the size and setup of a sitting room. There were a couple of armchairs and a squashy sofa arranged in front of a large fire. A small table with a bottle of elf-made wine sat next to the table; he hadn't specifically requested it but thought it was a smart touch and knew that a bottle of his own stash would be gone the next time he checked. The door closed behind him and he made for the wine, but he was attacked first.

Isabella had pushed him against the wall and kissed him with an astonishing amount of intensity. Maybe she wasn't as tired as she appeared. Only a second of surprise passed before his hands were on her hips, pulling her harshly against him, and he was kissing her back. Their tongues battled for control before Isabella suddenly broke the kiss just as his hands began to roam under her sweater. She looked up at him and smiled.

"I know it sounds silly, but I missed you."

Sirius grinned down at her. "I tend to have that effect."

She swatted his arm and turned towards the sofa. He had missed her as well, but didn't think it needed to be said. She had to have known, considering he came to meet her. But as much as he was happy to see her, her absence last night, a full moon, which had already been wrought with complications since James did not attend, had been convenient. It was one less disappearance he would have to explain, though he knew she'd probably notice the pattern soon, especially since they coincided with Remus' departures, which Keira was bound to start questioning if she hadn't already.

Pushing those uncomfortable thoughts aside, Sirius joined Isabella on the couch as she poured them both a glass of wine. They drank silently as Sirius pulled Isabella into his lap so that she was reclining against the sofa's armrest. After spending the night in the Shrieking Shack and the day in Hogsmeade Apparating, he grew tired after the one glass, but he was able to stay alert to hear Isabella talk about her day.

"So seeing your cousins again wasn't as awkward as you'd feared?"

She shook her head. "Definitely not with Calvin. As soon as we hugged, it was as if the past year had not happened. Mariah, on the other hand, was still very quiet. I never knew her as well as Calvin or Imelda though, so her reticence is understandable. And I think it had more to do with the fact that she's just lost most of her family."

"And they're moving to New York. How soon?"

"I think as soon as my dad can clear it, but I don't think it's being made an official move just in case someone tries to go after them." She finished her wine and set her glass back on the table with a sigh as she shut her eyes. "Today was just…_unpleasant_. Is that a nice way to put it?"

Sirius gave a small sad smile and shrugged.

"I mean, the service was beautiful—the speeches from Calvin, the Minister, their friends. But, God, I hope I never have to attend the funeral of six people in the same day again." She opened her eyes, and Sirius could see unshed tears. "But I feel like it's only the beginning."

Sirius looked away from her and gazed at the fire. He normally wouldn't agree with such doom-and-gloom predictions, but Clarice had crossed his mind, and he was unable to let the thought go.

They continued to talk for a while, Sirius recounting the day in Hogsmeade and how Armando Plies splinched a couple of toes. He was just starting to talk about Peter's mum's wedding over Easter break and the possibility of them going together when he realized she was sleeping. He closed his own eyes, knowing it was best to let her rest for a little while…

Sirius jerked awake when he heard a soft cry. He heard Isabella panting before his eyes adjusted to the low light from the nearly extinguished fire and saw that she had sat up and was now clutching her chest.

"You alright?"

"No," she sobbed.

"Bad dream?"

She nodded. Sirius pulled her back into his arms, and she cried silently for a few minutes.

"Sorry," she said as she leaned back and wiped impatiently at her tears.

"Don't apologize."

He glanced down at his watch; it was just after 2:00. He could have conjured a bed, but he figured it was best to get back to their dormitories. He would sleep better in his own bed, and knew she would too.

"Let's get back to Gryffindor Tower."

Isabella nodded while trying to pull herself together. She picked up her bag as Sirius grabbed her hand. They were already walking past the main staircase when they heard the Room of Requirement door disappear.

The Fat Lady was not pleased at being woken up so late, but she was too tired to reprimand them, or flirt with Sirius, and immediately granted them entry into the empty common room. He heard several cracks as they emerged from the portrait hole; it seemed that the house-elves did not want to be seen cleaning up. Sirius walked her to the door leading the girls' staircase, but Isabella stopped short.

"What's the matter?" He had an idea of the cause of her hesitancy, but he knew she had to be the one to voice it.

Isabella chewed on her lip for a moment, not looking at him. She looked as if she was steeling herself. Finally, she confidently met his gaze.

"I don't want to sleep alone tonight."

Sirius' mouth went dry, but he tried to keep his cool. "That can be arranged. Would you like me to escort you to Ravenclaw Tower to wake Adam?"

"Oh, yes, please. I've been wanting to feel his hands on my—"

"Alright, joke's over," Sirius said, raising his hands. He knew Adam _fucking_ Cohen was no real threat to him, but just the thought of the slimy Ravenclaw anywhere near Isabella rankled him immensely.

"You walked into that one," she said, crossing her arms.

"Touché," he said, trying to look contrite. "So do you no longer want to come with me upstairs?"

"I didn't say that."

Sirius smirked. "Come on, then."

He led her to the opposite door and up the stairs, his heart pounding. He knew he shouldn't expect anything, but Isabella had already caught him off guard with her bold request; maybe she would continue to surprise him tonight. However, he was honestly just happy she wanted to be with him. It signified her growing trust.

Opening the dormitory door, Sirius saw Peter's, Remus', and Andy's beds closed. James' was empty, but Sirius didn't worry; he knew James was most likely with Delilah, with whom he had spent every night since hearing the news about Clarice. He guided her to the farthest bed, closing the curtains halfway to hide them as they got ready in case anyone woke up, and rummaged through his wardrobe drawers for some suitable pajamas. He usually slept in only his boxers, but figured he should put on at least a shirt in case she got offended.

Out of the corner of his eye, Sirius watched as Isabella fished through her overnight bag and finally extract her sleeping clothes. She twisted them in her hands for a moment before clearing her throat.

"Yeah?"

"I need to change."

Sirius stood up straight and looked at her plainly, not seeing an issue. "Okay."

They stared at each other until Isabella's gaze turned insistent.

"Oh." He turned, climbed into his bed, and fully closed his curtains. He didn't understand her discomfort seeing as how he had seen her half-naked several times. He remained silent, however, and listened to Isabella undress just feet away.

"All done."

Sirius opened his curtains and frowned at the baggy black t-shirt she was wearing. But his eyes then found the very short grey and navy checkered shorts she was wearing, and he grinned. There was what looked like a school emblem the right leg. He had been hoping to see that blue silk set from her birthday, but this was certainly far from a disappointment.

"Those shorts from Morgana?"

"Yep. Our uniforms also consisted of pajamas, but we weren't required to wear these if we didn't want to."

"Even that shirt?"

"No, the matching shirt is long gone," she laughed. "I, er, sort of outgrew it."

His eyes swept over her indistinct chest, knowing the bounty that lied beneath. "I bet."

"I kept the shorts, though, because they're so comfortable." She walked to the bed, her hands twisting in front of her.

Sirius shifted to make room. "Don't be nervous; I won't bite. Besides, you've slept in here before."

"Yeah, but that was without my knowledge. Not that I would have been unwilling otherwise," she added quickly, "but I just like knowing what's going on." She lied down next to him, her back to his chest.

"Nothing wrong with that," he said, immediately spooning around her with his arm circled over her waist. He soon released her, though, and reached for his wand. He closed his curtains and set a silencing charm before slipping his wand beneath his pillow and wrapping his arm around her again.

Isabella sighed contentedly and moved closer against him as his hand slipped under her shirt to rub her back while his face buried in her soft, fragrant hair. Unable to control himself, he moved his hand to her smooth stomach before moving it up to her chest to caress her breasts. She gasped as he continued to fondle her, pulling and rubbing her nipples until they peaked.

His name fell from her lips in a whispered moan as she pushed her bum against his growing erection, and his mouth went dry again. He wanted to touch her so badly, to stroke the slick folds between her thighs and make her cry his name. But every previous time he had tried, she had pushed him away as part of her aim to slow down their sexual progression, which he honestly still did not understand. It was so simple to him: he wanted her, and she wanted him; why fight it? No other girl had.

_Then go be with those other girls, the Daphnes and the Janes, if you want it to be so easy,_ a voice in the back of his mind taunted. He had to admit that the idea was slightly enticing considering his recent frustration, but he pushed it all from his mind and concentrated on the girl that was currently in his bed, the girl he truly wanted, the one for which he would continue to be patient.

But her approval of his current attention was encouraging. With a final squeeze, he released her breasts and let his hand trail down her quivering stomach. As soon as two fingers slipped under the waistband of her shorts, however, she grabbed his hand. Sirius had to bite his lip to keep from cursing in irritation.

Still holding his hand, Isabella turned on her other side to face him. She took a deep, steadying breath.

"Sirius, I'm not going to try and put up this pure or virtuous front. I _do_ want you—to feel your hands and lips on every inch of my body. T-to feel you…" She trailed off and let out a heavy breath before licking her lips.

Sirius swallowed. If she was trying to deter him, she certainly was going about it the wrong way. His hands and lips were itching to fulfill that request.

"But right now, I'm terribly exhausted. And if you're a good boy now, I _promise_ you'll be rewarded in the morning." Her voice was heavy, but with drowsiness or desire, he wasn't sure.

He bit back a laugh at her appeal, the type that was typically said to a dog. If only she knew…

"Alright, you silly tease," he said, unable to keep the exasperation out of his voice.

"You'll be eating those words in a few hours."

Despite the dark, her lips found his, and she kissed him firmly, and in spite of his current disappointment, he couldn't help reacting to her. His tongue swept across her bottom lip before entering her mouth. The kiss quickly progressed into a snog as Sirius gently pushed against her until she was lying on her back. His free hand found her breasts under her shirt again, but when he pressed his arousal into her, she wrenched her mouth from his.

"Sorry," Sirius grunted, rolling off her.

"Let's just try to get some sleep."

"Yeah."

Isabella turned her back to his chest again as his hand grabbed her hips and pulled her closer. After a moment, though, he moved his bottom half away from her, not wanting to be tempted again.

"Afraid to get too close?"

Sirius heard the chuckle under breath. "You said I had to be good."

She sniggered again, but her breath eventually evened. Sirius was surprised at how quickly she had fallen asleep. He closed his eyes and tried not to think about what Isabella had in store for him…

Mingled dreams of his friends, foes in dark cloaks, and his screaming mother swirled through Sirius' mind, causing an agitated sleep. He was calm for a while until a tingling, heady warmth spread from Sirius' stomach to the very tips of his fingers and toes. The feeling reminded him of the days spent laying on the lakeshore in the summer sun between the end of exams and heading home for holiday. Or the days spent lounging around the pool at James' house.

But no. That wasn't right. He distinctly remembered falling asleep in his bed last night. With a girl—Isabella. Isabella, who had promised to reward him—

Sirius' eyes snapped open as he sat up.

"Bloody hell," he breathed at the sight before him.

It was Isabella, who had somehow removed the bedcovers, his pajama pants, and his boxers without his notice, kneeling between his legs, leaning forward, and sucking the entire length of him in and out of her mouth. It was the most glorious thing he had ever seen.

"Wh-what are you doing?" he asked stupidly.

She looked up at him, still moving her mouth over him, an eyebrow arched.

"Well…it's obvious what you're doing, but—_oh, fuck_."

A hand had just joined her mouth, squeezing and rubbing his shaft as her lips concentrated on the tip. Sirius fell back onto his pillows, realizing that this was meant to be enjoyed, not questioned.

He closed his eyes and reveled in the sensations of her tongue and lips and hands, jumping slightly when her nails grazed the sensitive skin of his inner thighs. Unable to resist looking any longer, he opened his eyes and drunk in the sight of her. He raised a hand, desperate to touch her, and caressed her cheek before threading his fingers through her dark, silky hair.

The tension began to build beneath his navel, complicating his effort to keep from pushing her head down further with his hand. But he was unable to keep his hips from slightly thrusting up to meet her bobbing head. His blood surged heatedly under his skin, causing a thin film of sweat to develop over him. He whispered her name over and over again until it rushed from his mouth.

"Isabella," he rasped, panting and sitting up slightly, "Isabella, love, I'm going to—"

But too late. With a grunt, every muscle in his body contracted in sweet torture as he emptied himself. He fell back to the bed, utterly spent and unable to move. He closed his eyes as his heart pounded against his temples, sighing as the last waves of his orgasm washed over him.

He felt himself slip from Isabella's mouth, and she moved his boxers back up his legs. After another moment he felt her sidle up against him, and he immediately wrapped an arm around her.

"You're a right little minx, you know that?" His breath was still quick and shallow.

"I told you not to doubt me."

"I never did; I just didn't expect _that_." He opened his eyes and looked at her. Her skin was still flushed from exertion. "You're bloody brilliant."

She smiled shyly before Sirius kissed her with an eagerness he could not hold back. With a sigh, she returned his fervor until the sound of a door slamming shut made her pull her lips from his and sit up with a gasp.

"Wake up, you lousy buggers." It was James.

"And that's why you always cast an Imperturbable over a Silencing charm," Sirius chuckled, "so you don't have to hear or aren't startled by anything on the other side of the barrier."

Isabella shrugged. "Well, you had already set a Silencing charm last night, and an Imperturbable takes too much concentration that I didn't have this morning. I was more concerned with getting started before you woke up."

"Which I very much appreciate."

The sound of opening bed hangings came from what Sirius knew was Peter's bed.

"Hey, Wormtail," James said dully. "I see Moony isn't here; has Padfoot been up?"

"I don't think so, but"—there was a yawn and shuffle of feet towards Sirius' bed—"there's an obvious charm on his bed, so he must have a girl in there."

Isabella's eyes narrowed down at Sirius. "_A_ girl?"

"He's only saying that because he knows my girl is in here and that we can hear him. His little joke."

"_Your_ girl?"

"Yeah," Sirius said, wrapping an arm around Isabella's back and jerking her back down on top of his chest so that her face was inches from his own, "be my girl."

The words had tumbled from his lips before he could stop them. He had been planning on asking Isabella to be his girlfriend for a few days now; he just hadn't wanted to make it some big production that most girls expected. After all, their exclusivity had pretty much been assumed—neither of them had been snogging anyone else since her birthday—and _she_ was the one who had not wanted to confuse anything with labels too early. But he realized that regardless of his method, he would have to ask. Now seemed like as good a time as any other.

Isabella stared at him with her mouth open. Before Sirius could grow nervous at her silence, a grand smile spread across her lips.

"I thought you'd never ask."

Her tone was playful, but Sirius was sure he heard a bit of truth in there. He kissed her to eliminate any doubt she may have.

As always, the kiss deepened into a frenzy. Sirius rolled Isabella onto her back so that he was trapped between her thighs. He pulled his lips from hers and planted kisses along her jaw and down her neck. One of her hands knotted in his hair when he began sucking on her pulse point.

His hands trailed down her torso, but he paused at her hips. He wondered if their new official status had loosened her apprehension. He ran his hands down the sides of her smooth legs and back up again, stopping mid thigh. Still kissing on her neck, he slipped a hand under the right cuff of her pajama shorts. It came into contact with already wet cotton knickers, and he bit his lip. He stroked her once with a firm hand, which earned a hiss but no other word of protest.

"Oh, Sirius," she whispered, "…_please_."

He swallowed and sat up, his hand still resting on her panties. Her heavy eyes were staring at him, and she was sucking on her bottom lip. He knew she wasn't begging for what _he_ really wanted, but he realized that not everything was all about him, and he would not forfeit an opportunity to see and touch what he had been so vehemently denied.

He leaned down and grazed her earlobe with his teeth before whispering, "At your pleasure."

Grabbing his wand, he set an Imperturbable charm around his bed in case his friends got the idea to whip his curtains open. He then wasted no time in removing Isabella's pajama shorts and hesitated only slightly with her knickers. He followed them with his gaze as he slowly pulled them down her legs. He ran his hands up her legs again before letting himself look at her. The dark curls between her thighs were glistening, and he could smell the musk of her arousal. He licked his lips, desperate to taste her, but knowing he had to take it one step at a time. He forced his gaze up at his girlfriend, who was now squirming anxiously with her eyes closed.

With his eyes still on her face, he brushed his thumb across her clit and pushed two fingers past her entrance. He was barely a couple of inches inside of her, however, when a strangled noise caught in his throat, he paused, and sat up.

Sirius had guessed Isabella was a virgin when he acknowledged his interest in her, had been told that information from the source herself just a few weeks ago, but having the evidence of Isabella's virginity in the palm of his hand—pun very much intended—was an entirely different thing.

Aside from how warm and slick she was, her walls were so incredibly tight around his fingers, tighter than anything he had experienced before. Since they began dating, Sirius had arrogantly assumed that he would be the one to which Isabella would give it up, but now the idea of taking her virginity took on an entirely different meaning. If the sensation around his fingers were any indication, he knew that experience would be the most demanding but incredible one yet, and he looked forward to what he knew was going to be an embarrassingly short moment of agonizing ecstasy.

But Sirius took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on the present moment. He was beginning to think that two fingers might be too much of an intrusion, but Isabella dispelled his worry when she began moving her hips against his hand in an antsy way. And he remembered, with a sudden flash of bitterness, that she must have not been too uncomfortable, for he was not the first to touch her like this. He pushed the thought out of his mind and looked down at his girlfriend as he began to move his fingers again, marveling at her beautiful cinnamon skin, which seemed to glow in the semidarkness, and longing to feel every inch of it against his own.

He watched the progress of his hand and began to grow hard again when his mind replaced it with his cock. Not wanting to make a mess in his pants, he tore his eyes away and moved up Isabella's body to kiss her until she was breathless. She was panting when he moved his lips to the spot on her neck that made her shiver.

With every 'Sirius'… 'God, yes'… and 'Don't stop' Isabella moaned, Sirius' blood surged, which was intensified by her nails digging into his shoulder in time with the pumping of his hand. He too was now panting against her neck, unable to keep himself from imagining plunging into her and fighting hard against his own desire that was threatening to explode. He increased the pace of his fingers and anchored his thumb to her clit. She gasped and moaned so piercingly that Sirius would have otherwise thought she was sobbing.

Just when Sirius thought he wasn't going to last, Isabella's walls clenched around his fingers and she stiffened for a full three seconds before she shuddered uncontrollably and cried his name. He dropped his forehead to her shoulder and tried to gain control of his own breathing as he felt Isabella's body calm and slacken.

He sat up as he removed his fingers, and against his better judgment, sucked on them like they were a sugar quill. Isabella's eyes opened as her breathing slowed, and Sirius was surprised to see obvious lust still heavy in her gaze. Her dark hair was spread wildly around her like a halo. She grabbed the waistband of his boxers and pulled him towards her so that he was positioned between her legs again. They kissed frantically and moved against each other a few times before they froze.

They had both realized the same thing at the same time—that the only thing separating Sirius' growing erection from Isabella's cunny was the thin fabric of his boxers that were now damp with the warm wetness of her orgasm. They stared at each other for a moment, knowing that if they kept going, there would be no stopping things later. Sirius was ready and willing, but he knew it had to be her decision.

Isabella sighed and bit her lip before sitting up. "I think we both need a cold shower."

Sirius let out the breath he was holding, relieved but somewhat disappointed. "More like a swim in the North Sea for me."

"Remember what I said about anticipation?" she asked with a smirk. She made a move as if to kiss him, but he groaned and scooted carefully away from her, grabbed her knickers, and handed them to her.

"You should put these back on."

Isabella took them with a grin of understanding and pulled them over her legs. Sirius meanwhile looked away, bit down on his lip, and thought of the way Daphne simpered at him when she wanted sex. He shuddered at the image and felt instant relief.

_What did I ever see in her?_

"I should get going," Isabella said, suddenly looking shy. She grabbed her wand, moved to the edge of his bed, and was about to end the incantation when Sirius reached for her arm.

"Isabella, wait. I don't want you to think I asked you to be my girlfriend only so you'd let me…you know. I _do_ want to be with you."

"I never thought that," Isabella said as a smile appeared at her lips, "but your reassurance is comforting."

"Are you sure you don't want me to distract the guys so you can leave undetected?"

She shook her head. "We're all mature teenagers, aren't we?" Sirius gave her a skeptical look. "Well, it's not as if they don't know what's going on."

Isabella waved her wand, and the sounds of the dormitory surrounded them as if they had just turned on a wireless. She parted his curtains on the side facing the windows and silently retrieved her jeans and sweater from her bag and put them on over her panties and sleeping shirt. She then ran her fingers through her hair before tying it back and turning towards him.

"Want to meet for a late lunch?"

Sirius glanced at his bedside clock. It was 10:30; breakfast was just ending. "Sure."

"See you in a bit then." She smiled before leaning towards him and kissing him soundly on the mouth. Before he could pull her to him, she stood and walked around to the other side of the bed; Peter and James stopped talking immediately.

"Good morning, boys." He could hear the smirk in her voice.

"Morning, Isabella," James said, his voice slightly livelier than it had been all week.

"Morning," Peter greeted.

Sirius pulled on his pajama pants and fully opened his curtains just as the dormitory door closed. His friends gaped at him.

"It took you almost two months to get Isabella into your bed," Peter said. "That must be the longest of all of your conquests."

"We didn't do anything," Sirius said petulantly as he poured himself a glass of water. "At least not what you're thinking."

Peter gave him a doubtful look.

"And I would appreciate it if you didn't speak so lowly of my girlfriend."

Peter rolled his eyes, but James raised his eyebrows.

"Isabella's your girl?" he asked.

"Yes," Sirius said, warming a little at the thought.

"Well, I hope you know what you're doing…and that she knows what she's getting into." James stood from his bed and grabbed his dressing gown. "I'm going for a shower."

Sirius narrowed his eyes at his best friend. He knew James was still in a funk, and rightfully so, but that comment still annoyed him. It was James who had been chiding him for being too much a nancy to move things forward with Isabella.

But Sirius let his irritation go. James appeared as if he was going to finally spend some time away from Delilah today, and he, Peter, and Remus would need to keep James distracted and in high spirits.

* * *

As each sleepless minute passed, the bottle of firewhiskey James knew was in Remus' trunk was looking more and more tempting. He wasn't sure what time it was, but he knew it was rather late. He and his roommates had not retired to bed until after 1:30 AM, and he knew he had been staring up into the blackness of his enclosed canopy bed for at least an hour.

If Delilah had been here, James would have been able to fall asleep without issue, but he had realized that after practically holding her hostage for the past week, she deserved some alone time and that he owed some to himself as well. Besides, he had started to grow uncomfortable with how much he had been relying on Delilah the past week, but being with her had been so much easier than hanging around his friends.

Sirius, Remus, and Peter had known his mother since their first year when she had invited them all to the Potters' home for Easter holiday. Since then, his friends, and especially Sirius, had admired and cared for her almost as much as James had. The frightening news his father had shared with them last Monday had distressed them all, and James had found it utterly unbearable to see his own fear and misery mirrored in their faces, which had pushed him into Delilah's arms as soon as she was done with classes on Monday afternoon.

Delilah had of course heard the news about his mother's abduction and was sad for him, but not as acutely as his mates. Over the past week, she had kept him distracted with inane stories about her silly roommates and the growing dysfunction of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team due to the Captain and Seeker messing around with the same girl. When he tired of those, she had used other, more amorous methods to quell his anxiety.

But as much as he had enjoyed his time with Delilah, James knew the neglect of his mates had reached a selfish and unacceptable level, especially after skipping out on the full moon this past Friday. They had all agreed his staying back was necessary—for if his father or someone else from the Ministry had arrived at the school with news about his mother and he, Sirius, and Peter were nowhere to be found in bounds, Dumbledore would most likely put the signs together, and they would be done for—but it had still been frowned upon, especially by Sirius. So, he had made the decision to spend today with his friends, which had not been as bad as anticipated.

They hadn't done much—just chatted, caught up on homework, played a couple of games chess. There had not been a single word of his mother or anything to do with last weekend's Death Eater attack, which hadn't surprised him. Sirius carried on as if he hadn't given Clarice a single thought this past week, but Peter had dismissed that notion when Sirius left to have lunch with Isabella. He informed James that while Sirius had not said anything to either him or Remus about Clarice over the past week, there had been times when Peter caught Sirius staring at his textbooks or into the fire, his eyes unfocused and unmoving, showing signs of life only when he lifted a hand to wipe impatiently at his eyes.

That news had surprised James, for Sirius _never_ cried, and it was certainly more than James had allowed himself to do all week. James had worked hard to stave off the depression that threatened to consume him and make him vulnerable. He could not afford it, not in front of Delilah, his Quidditch team, or his Slytherin enemies. It had been hard, though, with everyone's sympathetic glances, concerned whispers behind his back, or pats on the shoulder from his professors. He had feared that Isabella was going to offer words of comfort and an invitation to talk, but she had thankfully not approached him, though he did appreciate her small understanding smiles. He wondered how she had not gone crazy when she had been in the same situation last year before remembering that she had been blissfully ignorant of everything going on until her mother was…

And then James envied her. Yes, his mother was presumably alive, thank God, but he couldn't bear the idea of her enduring whatever madness Voldemort and his Death Eaters were subjecting her to. His mum was a smart, capable witch, but Mrs. Williams had been one too, and younger, and she still had not been able to escape. And of course, just as Mr. Williams had done with Isabella, Edward had not contacted James since Monday morning, which angered him greatly. He had no idea what was going on, which only served to heighten the uncertainty and unease.

What would happen when Clarice could no longer carry on? Was Voldemort trying to bargain for something? Did he have any intention of letting her go even if he got what he wanted? Would James ever see his mother again?

The questions zoomed relentlessly through his mind, but unlike before, he was not able to simply push them aside and concentrate on his Transfiguration homework, Delilah's lips, or Quidditch drills. They mercilessly took hold of him, forcing him to think, for the first time, of the possibility of life without his mum.

As much as the notion embarrassed him, and allowed Sirius took the mickey, James had always been his mother's son. Not that he didn't love or wasn't close to his father, but with Edward's long nights at the Ministry during his ascent through the Magical Law Enforcement and Auror departments, James and Clarice's close relationship was inevitable.

Yes, she coddled him, interfered, and worried too much over him, as mothers with only children always did, but James had learned to appreciate it. It had taken the revelation of Sirius' homelife to make James grateful for the mother who loved him unconditionally, who would do anything to ensure his happiness and safety, even lay down her life if necessary. And was that what it would come down to, his mum sacrificing herself for him, his father, her friends and other loved ones? Was that the part she was meant to play in the fight against Voldemort?

James shut his eyes tight and gripped his sheets, trying to force down the impending panic. The thought of no more Easters at home with the scent of his mum's famous roasted ham in the air, summer holidays spent on the Canary Islands, or the Potter's annual New Year's Eve party upset him severely. And then there were all the little things Clarice did out of genuine consideration and benevolence—the generous care packages she sent for him and his friends, preparation of his favorite meal on returns home for holidays, and her absolute acceptance of Sirius into her home and family when he had been turned away from his own. The unfairness of someone so good and compassionate subjected to the whim of a maniacal Dark wizard made James sick to his stomach.

And without warning, the emotions James had so stubbornly kept at bay all week—the anguish at knowing his mother was alone and in pain and the fear of the unknown, of life without her—consumed him, penetrated down to his very core. The hot, abrupt tears stung at his eyes before overflowing down his temples and into his ears. His whole body shook with silent sobs for what felt like hours until he was empty.

With his mind finally blank and his head pounding, James at last drifted off into a restless sleep, unaware that his best friend in the next bed over had been lying awake as well and heard his breakdown, barely being able to fight off his own.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait. I hit a terrible writer's block when trying to fill out the outline for this chapter and had to step away from it for a month. I'll be working more frequently now that I am feeling inspired again. Thanks for your continued interest and reviews!**


	20. Waiting in Vain

With a grunt of approval, Sirius placed his glass back on the table. He had tossed back the firewhiskey in one go, and it burned going down his throat. He didn't mind, though; it was delicious and had jolted some life back into him. He looked around the table at his friends and saw their grins of approval as well.

"So, what's the verdict?" Rosmerta asked as she passed their table, holding a platter of food.

"The best I've ever had," James said, smacking his lips.

Remus piped up next. "Yeah, Ogden's is going to taste like rubbish after this."

"Sorry to ruin your favorite," Rosmerta chuckled before lowering her voice. "Can I get you boys another round?"

"Why not? It's on James' tab," Sirius said with a grin at his best friend. Peter clapped James' back jovially, but the latter only shrugged.

"Coming right up." Rosmerta readjusted her platter and sauntered away.

The boys then fell silent, contemplating the significance of the day's event. They had all just passed their Apparition exam and were waiting out in the Three Broomsticks for the rest of their class to finish. Everyone, except Dorcas Meadows and Armando Plies, was enjoying celebratory butterbeer, but Rosmerta had offered the four boys a taste of her private and very exclusive stock of Dodderidge's Finest Firewhiskey, aged over 100 years and with a price tag to match. Though they were of age, they technically were still out on school business and should not have been drinking, but the Ministry officials were paying them no mind and Rosmerta knew how to be discreet.

Besides, Sirius thought the risk was worth it judging how content he currently felt and how relaxed James appeared. He had been worried about James after hearing him fall apart late Sunday night, but James had somehow pulled himself together to almost normal these past few days. Sirius knew that Delilah had been a big part of that.

There had also been the very small bit of relief provided by the news they had received from James' father just yesterday before dinner. Sirius had sat by James' side as the latter was on a Floo call with Edward, who looked as if he had consumed a cauldron full of Aging potion in the past week and a half. They had shared small talk until James went straight to the point.

"Is there any news about mum? Have you made any contact?" James had asked impatiently.

Edward had pulled a face before nodding tersely.

"_Well_?"

"We have made contact. She says she's doing fine."

"_Fine_?" James had repeated. "She's still in Voldemort's custody and she says she's 'fine?' What in the _bleeding hell_ does that mean?"

Edward let out a heavy breath. "I'm sorry, son, but that's all I can tell you."

The call had ended shortly after that, leaving them both angry, but James to the point of shaking. He had left McGonagall's study, without saying a word to Sirius, to fly off most of his anger and had returned to their dormitory hours later, appearing as if nothing had happened.

Sirius feared that James might not have been of sound mind enough to take today's exam. Hell, Sirius thought he himself might have been too distracted, but they had both taken the chance; Apparition was too important to let wait until the summer in the current political climate.

They may not be fully trained wizards by the Ministry's standards since they had another year of schooling to complete, but their knowledge and talent made that a non-factor. If they were forced out of school this very second and thrown into the war, they would be able to completely take care of themselves. No longer would they have to depend on a fireplace and Floo powder, a licensed adult, the Knight Bus, a portkey, or a broom. Apparition had been the last vital key to true independence.

"Here you are," Rosmerta sang as she approached their table. She placed the four glasses between them before rushing back to the bar to greet new customers who had just arrived. "Let me know if you want some grub," she called over her shoulder.

They each took a glass, and Sirius decided to sip his drink this time to enjoy the unique flavor.

"So who's decided to go home tomorrow?" Remus asked after another moment of silence.

"I am," James answered first. "I'm taking the train there but might Apparate back if I get too bored."

Sirius took that to mean 'if home is too depressing.' He didn't think James would be able to bear all of Easter holiday at home without his mum there. Sirius knew he himself wouldn't be able to and planned to not even bother taking the chance.

"I'm staying," he said. "Thought about starting to look for a flat for the summer, but figure there's no rush."

James raised his eyebrows at that bit of information. "I didn't know you were planning to move out."

"It's always been a thought in the back of my mind since receiving that money from my uncle."

James took a sip from his drink and frowned. "It'll break my mother's heart when she finds out."

Sirius only nodded, having already known that, but he knew she'd understand in the long run.

"I'm staying as well," Remus said. "Parents are going on holiday; the house will be too quiet."

Sirius took _that_ to mean 'because Keira is staying,' which he had learned from Isabella just last night. Jane was staying as well, but Lily planned to return home.

"But you're all still coming to my mum's wedding, right?" Peter asked with a worried brow.

"Of course, Peter," Remus said.

"Besides," Sirius added, raising his glass, "we wouldn't miss that open bar for the world. Romanians like their drink, or so I've been told." Peter grinned with relief. Sirius knew this marriage was hitting Peter harder than he was letting on and that he was counting on the support of his friends.

A sudden cheer from a table of Ravenclaws caught Sirius' attention. He looked over in time to see Giles Wilkins enter the crowded pub, giving a thumbs-up before his housemates regaled him with claps on the back and a mug of butterbeer. This meant that Isabella, as the last eligible student in sixth year, was up next. Sirius silently wished her good luck, but he knew he needn't worry. She may have missed the last Apparition training, but she had mastered it during the second-to-last session of their 12-week course. He just wished that when Isabella did show up, he could keep the awkwardness to a minimum. He figured it shouldn't be too difficult, as it was entirely one-sided on his end, but he had not done such a good job at hiding it since this morning.

Only four days had passed since Sirius and Isabella became an official couple, and nothing much had changed between them—except for the fact that Sirius had realized this morning, after waking up with her in his arms, that he was falling for her. The realization both heartened and annoyed him.

It heartened him because it validated his initial attraction and pursuit of Isabella. Sirius, and his friends, had constantly questioned his motives before and even during his exclusive time with her, and this morning had shown he had been right in taking a chance. And Sirius liked being right.

However, it annoyed him because Sirius didn't like falling for girls, much less them knowing it. He had made his first and only mistake back towards the end of his fourth year after Cori Kelly took his virginity. His arrogance and naïveté had had him thinking he and Cori were a 'thing' afterwards, spurring him to approach her one evening in the common room while surrounded by her friends.

"So Cori, any preference on where we head to in Hogsmeade this weekend?" he had asked in what he thought was an appealing swagger.

"Hogsmeade?" Cori's thick brown eyebrows had knitted together in confusion before understanding crossed her features. "Sorry, Sirius, I'm going into Hogsmeade with Ty Wallingford, but maybe you and I can meet up later that night," she had added in a low tone.

Sirius had stared at her in bewilderment, wondering how she could have made a date with bloody Wallingford after they, he and Cori, had had such a great time. He had then looked around at her friends, who were regarding him with a mixture of pity and amusement, when it had hit him.

"Oh." And before his ego could suffer any more damage, he had turned and walked back towards his friends, with Cori and her friends' sniggers following him the entire way.

Sirius had learned the very quick and embarrassing lesson that, while considerably fewer, there were _some_ girls out there who regarded sex and relationships in the same manner as most of their male counterparts—in other words, not very highly—and Cori was one of them. He had vowed back then that he would not let himself make the same stupid mistake again. Girlfriends, even imagined ones, were nothing but trouble.

Since then, many girls, including ones he never slept with, had tried to become his one and only, but Sirius had mastered the ability to control his emotions and reign them in when he felt himself turning nancy. Only Daphne had come close to breaking through his walls, but then summer holiday came, and the distance, infrequent meetings, and his realization of her true nature had let him regain control.

But now the question was what route he would take with Isabella. If he were honest with himself, however, he knew his pursuit of her had already answered that question. Yes, he had led her on, but she had called him out, challenged him, and been brutally honest about her own feelings. And he had still gone out of his way for her birthday. Something different was brewing inside of him, that he knew, but it was going to take a lot of willpower to keep it going, to not revert back to his old ways and push Isabella away.

The good thing was that she seemed to not have noticed his internal conflict this morning. The rain had woken her up, but she kissed him before he could utter a terse 'good morning.' An intense snog had quickly followed, but she slinked away before it could progress into anything more. It had been the only night she had spent with him since becoming official, and she was uncomfortable with his roommates knowing she stayed the night despite her initial confidence last Sunday morning. That and it was Thursday, and they had been expected to attend their first class before heading into Hogsmeade for their licensing exam.

A guffaw from Peter jolted Sirius from his thoughts, and he joined in the laughter from a joke James had told. He raised his glass and took another sip, glancing towards the door every so often.

A few minutes later, the tinkling bell caught his attention, and Sirius grinned as he watched Isabella walk into the pub, looking windswept with raindrops in her hair. She waved to her roommates sitting on the other side of the room, but she made her way to the boys' table first.

"Passed your test, I hope," James said in greeting.

Isabella nodded confidently. "Would you expect anything less?"

"Of course not. Congratulations." The others offered their congrats as well.

Sirius gripped her hand under the table. "Want to join us for a celebratory drink?"

"Maybe in a minute. I want to chat with the girls first." She gave him an endearing smile. "I'll catch up with you guys a in bit." She slowly pulled her fingers from his as she walked away.

Peter snickered. "Your girl just said 'No' to you, and you aren't upset about it?"

Sirius rolled his eyes and shrugged. "I'm not her keeper. She can do as she pleases."

The other three raised their eyebrows at that comment, and Sirius instantly grew annoyed that his friends saw him as a controlling prick.

Yep, it certainly was going to take a good deal of willpower not to revert. Sirius just hoped his pride could take it and be as patient as Isabella had been so far.

* * *

As soon as her feet hit the ground, Isabella gasped in air as if she had been held under water for an hour. A second gasp escaped her as her eyes adjusted to the sight before her. She let go of Sirius' hand and rushed forward in a state of disbelief.

The Jones family compound lay in complete destruction. The house looked as if it had been blasted away in several areas, the grounds were overgrown, if not completely charred away in many places, and the wrought iron gate that had separated it from the outside world was rusted, bent, and missing large chunks.

"Oh God, no," Isabella sobbed into her hand as she held onto the gate with the other. The last vestiges of her mother's family were gone. It was too much for her heart and mind to handle. She felt her knees give just as Sirius approached and wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"Isabella, love, I'm so sorry." He steadied her and turned her around to face him. Through tear-filled eyes, she saw his grave expression. "We should go back. We don't know if any foes are lingering about—"

"No!" she cried fiercely. "I'm not leaving without seeing my mother's grave."

Sirius looked as if he was going to protest but thought better of it. "Okay. Okay, of course. I'll come with you."

"You can't. I told you before it's protected from outsid—Sirius, no!"

He had wrapped his hand around what was left of the entrance gate. However, unlike her father and, she assumed, many would-be trespassers, he was not cursed and thrown back from it.

And then she knew, wondering why she had not considered it before coming here. The ancient blood magic that had protected the manor had ended with the death of the family's matriarch, her grandmother. Death Eaters and whoever else had been able to penetrate the property for at least a few weeks now. She wondered if her father was aware.

"Come on." Sirius grabbed her hand, opened the gate, and led her inside.

They edged their way through the mangled mess. Random pieces of furniture, tapestries, family portraits, and countless heirlooms laid strewn about the landscape. Isabella's heart clenched painfully as she passed each one. She was stuck somewhere between relief and displeasure at not having postponed the trip one more day.

It was the first Tuesday of their Easter break. Sirius had suggested coming this past Saturday during their Hogsmeade trip, but it had been the first sunny, cloudless, and rainless day since spring officially started, and Isabella had wanted to enjoy the day properly.

She and Sirius had walked about Hogsmeade and shared a long, leisurely lunch at the Three Broomsticks before returning to the grounds and strolling around the lake. They had then retreated to a large beech tree where they were able to get in a few heavy kisses before being joined by Remus and Keira.

On Sunday and Monday, Isabella had simply not been in the mood and was considering cancelling the plans altogether until Sirius called her out late Monday night. She had admitted she was just afraid of the unknown. She wasn't sure why the prospect of visiting her mother's burial site had had her so uneasy since she had been before; now seeing the ruin around them, she should have taken it as a bad omen.

But Sirius had been able to quell her fears and help her relax. As it made for more privacy, she had been very grateful for the fewer students around Gryffindor Tower and the absence of most of his roommates.

So this morning, with the help of James' Invisibility Cloak, that unusual map, and an enchanted branch, Isabella and Sirius had entered the passage under the frozen Whomping Willow to Apparate from the Shrieking Shack, which Sirius thought would be safer than the cellar of Honeydukes. The one positive was that it was a spectacular day with the perfect amount of sun and breeze. It felt great to be out of their restricting school robes.

It suddenly hit Isabella that Sirius did not know where he was going. She squeezed his hand and began leading him towards the family mausoleum. She should have expected it to look as horrible as the rest of the property, but seeing it in such disorder still hurt when they came upon it. The thought of seeing her mother's grave in this manner became suddenly overwhelming, and she was tempted to turn back. But as they reached it, her heart skipped a beat.

Unlike the nameless relatives surrounding hers, Estelle's grave looked as if it had been tended to. The weeds and other overgrowth had been trimmed back, her white marble headstone was spotless and sparkling, and a bouquet of pink tulips lay at its base.

Isabella dropped to her knees. "He's been here."

"Who's been here?"

"My father."

"How do you know?"

Isabella gave Sirius an exasperated look. "Who else would have cleaned this up while leaving the others looking like trash?" Tears sprung to her eyes. "Why didn't he tell me?"

Sirius kneeled next to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Maybe he thought it was something you needed to experience on your own, after he was able to clean it up a bit. It must have been a severe shock for him when he first came—finally being allowed inside but finding everything like this."

"_Earth hath no sorrow that heaven cannot heal; to live in the hearts of those we love is never to die." _

Isabella mumbled the epitaph she had memorized long ago, but at the moment, the words provided little comfort. Her father had advised her to not weep for the physical, for Estelle's spirit was free, happy, and all around them. But there were those times when she needed the physical presence of her mother, when the idea of Estelle's spirit watching over her was not enough. When she needed a mother's advice on school, career, and matters of life that she just was not comfortable discussing with her father.

"More than a year has passed; why do I still feel so helpless?" she whispered.

Sirius sat cross-legged on the ground and pulled her into his lap. "There is no timeline on grief. It comes and goes; sometimes it hits harder than other times. It's not like you've been living the past year under a cloud. You've moved on, but there are going to be times when it overwhelms you, like now, which can be expected since it's been a while since your last visit. You have nothing to be ashamed about."

Isabella nodded but did not trust herself to speak. She sobbed silently and appreciated it when she felt Sirius squeeze her tightly.

Time passed, but Isabella did not know how much. The sun had already begun to cast long shadows as it reached the horizon when she was out of tears and no longer wanted to be there. She slowly stood, and Sirius did the same.

"Can we go?"

He wiped the last tears from her eyes and lifted her chin to look at her. "We can do whatever you want."

"I want to go home. To Long Island."

"Unfortunately that, my dear Bella, is the one thing we cannot do," he said with a small chuckle. "But we can head to the Room of Requirement and go from there."

She smiled warmly at the idea, but she had been slightly caught off guard by his use of the name 'Bella.' He had never used it before, but it sounded nice coming from his lips.

It was just so odd, how serious a quality their relationship had taken so quickly. It slightly unnerved her, especially considering all the unflattering rumors she had heard about Sirius. If Isabella was truly honest with herself, she was surprised that he had not already dumped her and moved onto the next easy target. But it appeared that he was resolute in making whatever change he had promised to himself and whomever else.

It was moments like this that tested her resolve to not completely fall for him. She had to keep reminding herself that she had known him for less than a year, that it was too soon, that she was still emotionally vulnerable and just infatuated. But he had not yet taken advantage of her and had been more supportive and patient than she could have ever dreamed. Maybe she could give him more credit.

"You're amazing." She kissed him with as much gratitude as she could muster. "I'm so lucky to have you."

Sirius blinked, as if unsure of what to say, but he quickly regained his composure. "Some people wouldn't call it luck, though," he said with a grin. "Many people simply think you're barking."

"And like I've said before—I'm trying not to care would people think."

Sirius sighed. "If only that were true in the same sense I'm thinking of." When Isabella smacked him on the arm, he added, "But patience _is_ a virtue…"

"…That causes no shame," Isabella finished.

"Just a lot of frustration."

Isabella pursed her lips. Yes, waiting for the right time had certainly caused a lot of frustration for her too, but if Sirius knew that, it would just give him more ammunition to move their relationship to that next step. She was determined to keep some bit of control.

Sirius grabbed her hand and began leading them back to the entrance. "Back to Hogwarts, then?"

"Not so soon."

"Dinner in London?"

Isabella frowned, thinking back to her father's vague remark that Aurors were keeping track of her. "You don't think that's pushing it a bit?"

"We'll have an early meal in Muggle London and will be climbing through the Whomping Willow by sunset, plenty of time before curfew."

"I can't lie—escaping the magical world for a while sounds like heaven."

"Then let's not waste another second." Sirius turned to face her as they stepped outside the gate and wrapped his arms tight around her waist.

Isabella glanced back at her mother's former home, content that she was now closer to her mom than she was back in New York, but feeling more like the home itself and what it represented—the years of family discord—was part of her past. She looked back to Sirius, a significant part of her present and, she hoped, her future. Happy with how far she had come, she returned his smile as he spun them into suffocating darkness.

* * *

James's brain felt like mush. He had drunk way too much scotch way too quickly, and now he was sitting alone at the table he shared with his friends at Peter's mum's wedding.

If he were honest, he should have seen this coming. He had been in a terrible mood the entire week he had spent at home. His father had been there only a handful of times and refused to share any information when he was home, which angered James more than he had ever been in his life. The only thing keeping James from thinking the worst of Edward and cursing him was Edward himself. His father looked absolutely horrible. He was ragged and gaunt, as if he had lost all desire for life. James knew that whatever he, James, was feeling, his father was feeling a million times worse.

On top of that, Delilah was acting weird. She had cancelled on him just the day before through owl post. 'Family stuff came up' was her vague excuse with a half-hearted apology and a claim that she couldn't wait to see him at the start of term, which meant she had no intention of writing him again or seeing him at all during the rest of break. James thought that was odd considering that they both could now Apparate and essentially see each other whenever they wanted. However, after a few hours of extremely disproportionate resentment, he wrote a reply expressing his disappointment before wishing her a happy Easter.

The moment he showed up at Peter's home, James knew his week was not going to get any better. Sirius had shifted to his well-worn cantankerous mood the moment he had awakened. He had been a prick to everyone he encountered, especially Isabella, and the open bar was not helping. If James, Remus, or Peter didn't knock out Sirius soon, one of Peter's new relatives surely would. James was sure none of them understood Sirius' grumblings or unnecessary taunts, but dark glances and gestures transcended any language. Isabella in turn was now ignoring Sirius, not groveling at his feet like previous girlfriends, which James' patience appreciated, but he wished they would both get over their stupid stubbornness.

Meanwhile, Remus was still walking on eggshells around Keira, despite them being an official couple. James knew Remus was still anxious about this new situation, but, damn it, he wished Remus would grow some bollocks already and express the confidence he knew Remus was capable of.

Peter had put on a brave face most of the day, but as the alcohol began to flow after the ceremony, he didn't care to pretend anymore. He was now moping about as if his wand had been snapped in two by Ministry officials. It made James want to punch him. Upset about his mum's new husband Peter may be, but at least he had his mum, knew she was safe.

Oh, how James wished he could cut out early and go home, but he knew Apparating with the amount of alcohol currently in his system would have him splinched all over the Welsh countryside. Though, speaking of alcohol, his glass was now empty. He looked around the sunny lawn for one of the many servers, but they were all hovering around the tables occupied by the Romanians.

James rolled his eyes in annoyance—this had pretty much been the norm since he, his friends, and Peter's mum's side of the family, the little of which had shown up, arrived. A lot of money had been spent on transforming the large, muddy, and neglected field behind Peter's home to a comfortable space for a wedding ceremony and reception. There was lush foliage, countless house-elves and tuxedoed servers, the aforementioned endless libations, and Hogwarts feast-worthy food. And while James couldn't discern a silk napkin from a cotton one or goblin-made silver goblets from the priceless ones forged by ancient Nordic wizards, he knew that all of the cutlery, dishes, table linens, drink ware, and other décor was very expensive, as it all had the look of stuff in his own home. Which meant it all had to have been paid for by Vasile Ionescu, Peter's new stepfather.

And then James wondered if money was why Marianna, Peter's mum, had married Vasile. But James shrugged, for did it really matter if that was her reason? The new Mrs. Ionescu, due to ancient Wizarding law, had inherited all of her former husband's debt, and had had her own and Peter's welfare to think about on top of that. Who was James, who had never and would never have to worry about money, to judge someone for how she gained the financial means to take care of her family? As long as Marianna wasn't hurting anyone, Peter's miffed feelings notwithstanding, James saw no issue.

With a huff of irritation, James stood and stumbled his way through the mingling crowd towards the bar. He slammed his glass down harder than he normally would have in a non-inebriated state, but it got the bartender's attention. The latter turned and raised his eyebrows.

"Another," James said gruffly, not caring to hide his impatience.

The bartender sneered. "This may be a private party, but I still have an obligation to keep you from hurting yourself or others. You're cut off."

It took a great deal of willpower for James to control his temper, which had been dangerously bubbling just below the surface since the start of this exasperating day. With clenched teeth, he reached into his pocket, fished out 10 galleons, and dropped them wordlessly into the tip jar on the counter.

The bartender's sneer disappeared with a nod of his head. He filled James' glass with another healthy measure of scotch that James gulped down in one.

"You should slow down there, young Potter," a man said to his right. "Wouldn't want to embarrass the Head Auror of your precious Ministry."

James turned his head sharply at the sniping voice and immediately regretted it when he felt dizzy. Standing there was a tall, broad-shouldered man with dark hair and features that made him an obvious relative of the Ionescu family. Though his English was perfect, it was laced with the heavy accent distinctive of his homeland.

"And who the hell are you?"

"Vlad Ionescu. Cousin of Vasile and Junior Auror of the British Ministry of Magic turned worthless paper pusher by order of the honorable Edward Potter and illustrious Derrick Williams."

Even through the man's accent and his own drunken haze, James could hear the sarcasm. He knew this Vlad was angry over his father and Mr. Williams' decision to halt training of Junior Aurors in response to the recent attacks, but James felt no sympathy for the man who was now staring at him contemptuously. He made a gesture towards the bartender to refill his drink, who made no objection this time, obviously remembering the last generous tip.

"Well by the looks of you, the demotion was a smart decision."

Vlad shook his head. "Just as arrogant as your father, aren't you? He and Derrick go around recruiting in other countries, hoping to build a squad a multilingual Aurors for special missions and espionage, an important feature of Derrick's new training program. Promised lots of opportunities and generous compensation. Those of us with no prospects at home and nothing to lose pledge loyalty to a new Ministry just to have it all swept from under us and relegated to mindless desk jobs only eight months later when your Ministry can't keep its shit together."

James rolled his eyes; he didn't care for this man's gripes. "And so you've decided to complain to the Head Auror's son? What, too scared to take your complaints to my father or the Minister?"

Vlad did not rise to the bait, but James had not expected him to. Instead, he chuckled.

"Think you can talk to and treat anyone however you want without consequence because of who your father is, don't you?" Vlad asked rhetorically. "That may work at the little school of yours, but you and your dark-haired friend—" he gestured towards Sirius standing near the band on the outskirts of the gathered tables, sipping on a drink, and glaring at anyone who passed "—should watch yourselves on the outside and especially around those who don't give a damn about your father or your Ministry."

Something prickled at the back of James' mind in response to this last outburst. The claim that he thought himself better, smarter, safer, and whatever else compared to others because of 'who his father is' had been thrown at him before—by Peter in fact, so many weeks ago at the beginning of term. James still disagreed, but hearing it again didn't exactly feel so great. He pushed the thought away and instead concentrated on the other part of Vlad's incessant complaints.

"So you say you don't give a damn about the Ministry anymore?" James finished his refreshed drink before continuing. "That sounds a bit like treason to me. Don't think you'd be so quick to fly off the handle if someone were to report you to my father."

Vlad scoffed. "Trust me, my grievances are nothing new. The last thing your father cares about are the feelings of a group of duped Junior Aurors. As I said earlier, he has a lot to worry about right now…like the best way to revive your dear mother."

James shut his eyes tight and his heart clenched at the mention of his mother. He had been hoping he could escape the day without anyone bringing her up—what a naïve thought that had been. Being at home was hard enough; her absence was made more conspicuous by the countless flowers, cards, and other tokens of well wishes that covered every table, mantle, and counter. They were all so worthless and inconsequential in James' mind. Their empty words of 'Stay strong' and 'Clarice is in our hearts and prayers' provided no comfort, did nothing to fill the gaping hole in his chest. They were the platitudes used for someone in her sickbed.

And that is what angered James the most. Everyone inside and outside the Ministry was doing his best to avoid the real issue. Clarice was _not_ suffering from some unfortunate illness; she was in the clutches and at the mercy of the most evil wizard in Britain's history. The urge to blast away all the stupid flowers and gifts consumed James several times a day, but he controlled it each time, unsure of what they meant to his father—

"Wait, did you say '_revive_ your mother?'" James asked barely above a whisper. His mind had finally caught up with the other half of Vlad's last statement. He opened his eyes and turned to face the man who he had wanted to throttle by the neck only moments ago.

"Oh, do you not know? You mother was recovered a week ago and is currently being held at the Ministry." Vlad was now smirking at him, and James knew instantly that this moment—Vlad's revelation and James' reaction—was the real reason Vlad had approached him in the first place. The Junior Auror was very well aware that James had known nothing of Clarice's status, and he had wanted to be the one to break the unsettling news to the son of his most hated superior.

James stood there dumbfounded, unsure of what question to ask first. For the first time that day, he wished he hadn't drunk so much. His mind was moving at a troll's pace. He wanted to cry at the relief of his mom being alive, to Apparate straight to the Ministry to see her, to find his father immediately and demand answers. But most of all, he wanted more information, and he was just desperate enough to ask this ungrateful prick.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" James asked, trying hard not to look too eager.

Vlad's smirk grew more malicious. "I'm talking about your dear mum, who is being sequestered at the Ministry until they figure out what to do with her. She presents quite the complicated situation, which is why the news, which would have otherwise relieved some of the public's anxiety, has not been released. The minions like me aren't even supposed to know about it, but that's besides the point."

"What do you mean, 'until they figure out what to do to her?'"

"Well, you see, your mom was unconscious when she was found—you can ask your father exactly where that was. They brought her in, ran some tests, and decided it was okay to resuscitate her. However, the moment they _Innervated_ her, she snatched a wand out the hand of the closest Auror and threw Killing curses at the next two. She was so weak and malnourished from her captivity that the curses had only enough magical power behind them to barely break their skin, and she was subdued quickly. But after a few more tests, it was obvious she had been brainwashed and _Imperioused_ by Voldemort himself, knowing that she would be in the range of high-ranking officials and have the opportunity to hurt them."

James opened his mouth to speak, but Vlad cut him off.

"Just break the curse and deprogram her is what you're thinking, right?" Vlad chuckled mirthlessly. "Unfortunately, therein lies the dilemma. Voldemort is a terrible wizard, but he isn't an idiot. He arranged it so that any attempt to restore Clarice's mind and remove the curse will destroy her memory. Brilliant, isn't it?"

James' temper was now boiling over him. The desire to curse someone had never been stronger, even for Snape. But he needed to hear the rest; there was something missing from the story, something not yet connecting. He wasn't sure if his slow faculties were the reason he was missing the connection or Vlad's deliberately drawn out retelling—probably a mix of both.

"So forget deprogramming her, right?" Vlad continued. "Why not just nurse her back to her normal health without affecting her mind? Because then you give her strength to perform the deadly magic she was ordered to do. And you can't just revive her but then keep her imprisoned in the Ministry without a wand for the rest of her life so she doesn't hurt anyone. After all, she's innocent, and your father and other officials would never stand for it.

"And so that's the predicament your father is currently faced with. Keep your mother in her present state—weak and brainwashed to do Voldemort's bidding, nurse her back to health but keep her locked away, or restore her mind and let her go free, though with no recollection of her past life, including her husband and son." He inclined his head at James with a look that made no secret of his true pleasure of this twisted moment.

It was too much; it was all too much. James didn't want to believe it, but such a quandary would make sense considering how much more miserable his father looked in recent days. He couldn't imagine what it would feel like to see the woman you had loved and lived with for almost 50 years following the orders of your most reviled enemy, throwing Killing curses, and threatening the lives of others. His mum was the complete antithesis of Voldemort, his followers, and everything they stood for. It killed James just thinking about his mother acting in such a way that was so perverted against her nature.

A mix of bile and scotch bubbled up James' throat. He swallowed it back down, not wanting to show weakness in front of this stranger who so badly wanted to see him broken. James grabbed Vlad's drink from the bar and quaffed it down, his sense of taste so altered now that he had no idea what type of alcohol it was as it burned its way down to his stomach and began to dull the new wave of hopelessness that consumed him.

James needed to get home. He needed Sirius or Remus to take him away from this place and get him home before he could hear any more devastating news about his mum and completely lose himself.

He wanted Delilah.

Suddenly everything became constricting under the late-afternoon sun. James began to tug at the snug collar of his cursed dress robes. His heart hammered against his chest, and a cold sweat erupted over his skin. The music from the band grew discordant and pounded against his ears so powerfully that he thought his head might explode. He grabbed the ledge of the bar in attempt to steady himself, but the world began to spin and his breathing came in short, spastic gasps.

"Personally…" Vlad began, and it took all of James' determination to focus his attention on the Junior Auror, who was now growing more blurry and distorted by the second.

"Personally," Vlad repeated, apparently noticing that James was disappearing from the present, "I think your father should just put her out of her misery. You have all grown accustomed to living without her by now, no?"

James' exploding rage only exacerbated his panic, but he was determined to obliterate this fuckwit if it were the last thing he did. He reached inside his robes for his wand, but before he could close his hand around the handle, his stomach churned violently, and he pitched backward as he lost all control of his body. His heavy eyes admired the azure-blue sky for a brief moment before his entire world went black.

* * *

"You're sure? You're absolutely sure that they weren't dueling?"

Isabella pursed her lips. Keira was just like Jasmine sometimes—constantly requiring confirmation on matters already settled.

"Yes," Isabella replied. "Sirius said James just collapsed. Unless something was slipped into James' drink, the man he was talking to had nothing to do with it."

"So just your run-of-the-mill alcohol poisoning?"

"Looks like it."

"And James and that bloke were arguing?" When Isabella nodded, Keira asked, "About what?"

"Not sure. The bartender said he didn't hear what they were talking about, but that the tension during the discussion was obvious."

Keira worried her bottom lip. "Glad we got out of there as soon as we did. I wouldn't have been surprised if there had been a misunderstanding and a duel broke out. The friction between the two families and guests did not make for the most romantic setting."

Isabella nodded. "And I wouldn't have been surprised if Sirius had been the one to start it all." She didn't see James collapse, but she had watched Sirius run to James' side only moments later, his wand at the ready. Soon after, he had called for her to come help, and if it weren't for the genuine worry in his voice, Isabella would have ignored him. She was still so angry with him.

If Isabella had known the day would have turned out this way, she would have stayed at Hogwarts. She had already not that excited about attending the former Mrs. Pettigrew's wedding, but she wanted to escape the castle, as the days had been long and uneventful since returning from visiting her mother's grave.

Sirius had returned to the Potter's home the previous day to keep James company and asked her to come over the next morning. Isabella had put a lot of work into her appearance this morning, excited to attend a formal event with Sirius as a couple for the first time. Knowing that Sirius planned to wear his charcoal dress robes, Isabella chose her plum dress robes—her favorite set—to complement his, and had worn her hair in free-flowing waves, as Sirius preferred it down. Feeling pretty and confident as she Floo'ed from McGonagall's fireplace, Isabella's spirit sank as she stepped into James' formal sitting room, already feeling uneasiness in the air.

James and Sirius were still wearing lounge clothes, sitting on the back porch, and drinking scotch on ice. Derrick and his colleagues in America were the only people she knew who drank scotch regularly, and it was usually only during the most stressful and serious discussions. Sirius couldn't even spare her a glance when she greeted them, though James welcomed her with a solemn smile, and had insisted she wait for him inside while they finished up their conversation. Slightly hurt by the inattention but knowing the two boys were sharing a distressing experience, Isabella had gone back inside.

When they had come inside a little while later, Isabella offered to make some lunch since dinner wouldn't be served until late afternoon. Her ulterior motive had been to get some solid food into their stomachs considering how early they had been drinking; of course, that part had gone unsaid. James had nodded vaguely as he proceeded upstairs to his room, but Sirius had snapped at her.

"We don't need you coddling over us."

"Offering to make you lunch is not coddling," Isabella had shot back. "Stop being so damn stubborn." Sirius only ignored her.

The last straw had come a short time later after the boys had finally gotten their act together.

"I would gush over how handsome you look, but I don't think your ego could handle it," Isabella said as Sirius descended the stairs in his dress robes. With a smile, she had stood to straighten his tie in a perfunctory manner, but he jerked out of her reach.

"As handsome as your precious Dervish Spur?" he said lazily as he fixed his cufflinks, referring to the new Irish rock god of the Wizarding world that had set the hearts of the female population of Hogwarts aflame.

Isabella had rolled her eyes. "You know he's not my type."

"Oh right, you only cream for tall, dark, American Quidditch captains. How silly of me to forget," he sneered before heading for the kitchen.

Isabella's mouth had dropped in shock and horror. Why in the hell would Sirius bring up Garret, of all people? It made no sense.

Luckily, Remus and Keira had just appeared in the fireplace.

"Isabella, is everything okay?" Keira asked, having immediately picked up on Isabella's mood.

"No, it's not." Isabella had barely been able to keep her voice from breaking. She grabbed Keira's hand and looked at Remus apologetically. "I'm sorry, Remus, but I need some girl time. We'll meet you at Peter's." Without question, Remus had nodded and Keira followed her back into the fireplace and onto Isabella's own home, where she explained to Keira what had happened.

When they had Apparated to Peter's house a few hours later, Isabella ignored Sirius, who was obviously drunker and in a worse mood than when she had left him. Despite being in close proximity throughout the ceremony and most of the reception, they did not speak a single word to each other until James' emergency. Isabella had quickly gathered Remus and Keira, and together the four of them transported James home and contacted Mr. Potter at the Ministry.

"Don't worry," Mr. Potter had said them through the fire. "From what you're describing, it sounds like only alcohol poisoning. He should know better than this. Just turn him on his side and watch him. I don't need stories about the Head Auror's school-age son going on benders on top of everything else, so I'm sending a Mediwizard over instead of having you take him to St. Mungo's. I'll be home as soon as a I get a free moment."

Isabella had been reassured by Mr. Potter's quick assessment and plan, but she thought his comment about alcohol poisoning was quite flippant. She didn't think he would be so nonchalant if he had seen James' pale skin with its sickly bluish tint, or heard how shallow and slow his breathing was.

And now here they were. Sirius and Remus were in James' room assisting the Mediwizard, who had appeared only minutes after Mr. Potter bade them goodbye, while she and Keira sat in Sirius' room across the hall.

"So what are you going to do about Sirius?" Keira asked bluntly. She had asked earlier today after hearing about his abhorrent behavior, but Isabella had still been too angry to answer.

She was still upset, but her head was clearer now. Sirius' attitude and total disregard for her today had been the worse she had experienced and terribly cruel, especially the last comment. Isabella thought back to the last few days to determine what could have happened to encourage this recent mood change.

They had been near perfect since returning from their clandestine visit to the Jones' family manor. However, two nights ago, Isabella had stopped Sirius' hands as they began to undress her. With Remus and Keira in the boys' dormitory, Isabella and Sirius had been relegated to a sofa in the common room. And while the tower was still relatively empty for Easter break and it was rather late at night, Isabella was still uncomfortable. Her mother had taught her many things, and keeping a sense of decency and dignity were of upmost importance, which did not correlate with hooking up with her boyfriend in the middle of the common room.

Isabella had been about to suggest finding somewhere more discreet, but Sirius had immediately shutdown, taking the rejection harder than Isabella had anticipated. He cut her off and suggested that they each head to bed. And they had only a short time together before he Floo'ed to James' home the next day, which was nothing short of tense and awkward. Isabella thought the time apart would have eliminated his frustration, but she had been too trusting in common sense.

_Is that why he brought up Garret earlier?_ Isabella now wondered. _Does he think I let Garret go further than him?_

But even if that were the case, why the fuck did it matter now? She was with Sirius now and had not given Garret a single thought in months. How guys were always in competition with ex-boyfriends of no importance was so infuriating. And for him to insinuate that she still felt something for Garret, and especially in such a crass manner, was an insult to her true feelings for Sirius.

"I honestly don't know," Isabella finally sighed. "I'm definitely not letting him getting away with his actions today. I don't give a damn how upset he is about James."

"And if you do let him off, I'll certainly give him hell. I learned how to put Sirius in his place a long, long time ago."

"And we certainly envy you because of it," a new voice said.

Remus was now standing in the doorway; neither Isabella nor Keira had noticed him come in. His dress robes had been discarded, his tie was gone, and his sleeves were rolled to his elbows.

"How is James doing?" Keira asked, not bothered that she had been overheard.

"He's going to be fine. It involves a lot of pumping of potions into his stomach while sucking it out of—well, I'll leave that to your imagination. The Mediwizard was saying the Muggle method of treating alcohol poisoning is actually easier and a lot less messy, for once." He pushed his unkempt hair out of his face before facing Keira. "Now that he's stable, I was going to head back to Peter's to give him an update. I know he must be worried. Want to come along?"

Keira was standing and walking towards Remus before she even answered. "Of course." She turned to Isabella. "We'll see you in a bit."

"Yeah," Isabella said with a wave as the door closed.

Isabella remained in the window seat for a minute longer before anxiety forced her to her feet. She began pacing as conflicting thoughts about what to do about Sirius raced through her mind. More than once the thought of just ending it all presented itself. Their short time together had been full of steep valleys and short-lived peaks. She felt like a lot of this had been her fault, that she should have known better to get involved with him. Didn't everyone warn her? Hadn't she endured Sirius' erratic, stubborn, and sometimes spiteful nature before they even began 'dating' on her birthday?

Unlike many girls her age, Isabella had not gone into this relationship with the naïve thought that she could change Sirius. She didn't want to change him; everything that distinguished him from the other guys she had so far met at Hogwarts was what had attracted her to him. But she had hoped she could help him through the strain that disowning his family and everything along with it had caused him.

The trouble was that he didn't seem to want to let her in close enough to do that. At times, she thought his walls were starting to crumble, like when he held her and soothed her at her mother's grave, the early morning of her birthday, or the times they spent alone wandering the Hogwarts grounds. But then something like that night in the common room would happen, the times he didn't get his way, and he would close up faster than a niffler's snout over a galleon.

Isabella shook her head irritably, trying to clear her mind. She stopped pacing, realizing for the first time that she was in _Sirius' room_ _alone_. She suddenly had the indelible desire to snoop, but she had a feeling that he didn't have much kept here. After all, he had only lived here for less than a year, and most of his stuff was probably at Hogwarts.

Still, Isabella took a good look around, looking for something to investigate, to keep her mind off her current problems. The room had the same fine air as the rest of the house. The thick carpet, window hangings, and bed linens were done in light grey and slate blue over ebony wood furniture. Definitely not Sirius' style, but Isabella suspected that he had kept it so ornate out of respect for his adoptive mother.

There were only a few personal effects. A single poster of an immobile Harley Davidson motorcycle hung above the desk. There were a few moving photos on his bedside table. Mostly of himself with James, Peter, and Remus, and one with his brother Regelus. The last one caught Isabella's attention; she picked it up and sat down on the bed to examine it.

Sirius could not have been more than eight or nine years old; Regulus was his spitting image in miniature. They each had an arm around the other's shoulders, standing on cliffs above crashing waves. The large grins plastered on their faces looked genuine and contrasted starkly with the grimaces that seemed glued on their faces whenever they saw each other nowadays. The years that had passed since this picture was taken had differentiated their looks. In the handful of times Isabella had been able to get a good, full look at Regulus, she had noticed that while he was shorter than Sirius, he was also broader. Moreover, the lines of Regulus' face were sharper, perfect for that haughty look that she also noticed every once in a while on Sirius' own face. The Black family might have lost their natural heir to a bunch of Muggle-lovers, but a Black was still a Black, and the name would always garner respect from some and instill envy in most.

Isabella was still studying the picture when the bedroom door opened again. Sirius entered, looking just as Remus had—disheveled but alert. They stared at each other silently as Sirius closed the door. Isabella's heart instantly doubled its pace, but she refused to speak first.

Finally, a playful grin spread across Sirius' lips. "Seeing you in that dress on my bed has just forced every logical thought out of my mind."

Isabella's first reaction was to smile, but she kept her face neutral. The matching satin dress under her robes, which she had removed upon arrival back at the Potters', was much more revealing. She was flattered, but still pissed that it had taken him all day to notice how lovely his girlfriendlooked.

"So now you notice, huh?" She stood up from the bed, feeling that she would get her point across—whatever it ended up being—better standing than sitting down.

Sirius stepped towards her and gathered her in his arms before she realized what he was doing. "Trust me, I noticed the moment you arrived. You've been on my mind all day."

He then kissed her, slowly and passionately. Isabella was so caught off guard that she eagerly complied when he forced her mouth open, and she reveled in the sweet taste of scotch on his tongue. Shivers ran through her as his hands roamed over her back and rear, but the moan she voiced when he squeezed her waist was like a douse of cold water to her senses. She pulled back from him and put an arm's length between them.

"You have a funny way of showing it," she snapped. She then turned away from him and walked towards the sliding doors leading to the balcony. With her eyes closed, she tried to calm herself down. She didn't want to yell or cry, to come off as one of those 'hysterical birds' she had often heard him and James joke about. When she felt the lumps in the back of her throat loosen, she turned back to face him.

"What the fuck is your problem, Sirius?"

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "You're going to tell me what my problem is whether I get it right or not, so go right on ahead."

Anger burned inside her again. "Why do you treat me like this? You act like a fucking cad all day and then think you can come in, ogle me, throw out a lascivious comment, and manhandle me because you're randy and ready to be a boyfriend again, as if I've forgotten the malicious things you said to me this morning."

His face remained impassive, so Isabella continued.

"I am so sick of this. How can we share so many good moments together, just to have you shit all over them in a matter of days? Is this like some sick game to you? Are you afraid of letting me in, of actually enjoying yourself with me that you feel the need to sabotage it all?" She swallowed against the reformed lumps in her throat. "I didn't think I'd be saying this so soon, but you need to decide whether or not you want a girlfriend in your life right now. And if you do, then whether you want a girl who is going to let you walk all over her, grovel for your affection, let you build her up just to tear her down, or me."

Sirius remained silent and stared at her, and it was pure agony. Again, just as she had done in the library so many weeks ago, she had laid it all out there. And again, she was waiting on him to make up his mind, to determine the course of _her_ life. His holding all the power was beyond frustrating, and Isabella knew she would be more ashamed of herself for letting him have that power if she weren't so damn enamored with him.

"You're right," Sirius finally said with a heavy sigh. "I don't—I'm an ass at times…actually, a lot of the time, and I'm not exactly sure why I…" He pulled at his tie distractedly before tossing it aside. When he met her gaze again, he looked apologetic, and Isabella felt the despair rising in her chest.

"I really do like you, Isabella," Sirius continued, "but maybe we rushed into this. Maybe I didn't give myself enough time to process everything going on around me before jumping into this."

Isabella's heart gripped painfully, but she kept her voice steady. "And maybe I no longer have the patience to wait for you to figure it out." She then gathered her robes and walked past him towards the door. She was barely a step into the hall when she looked up and saw her father standing there. All of her angst and intent to burst into tears drained from her body immediately.

"Isabella, wait!" Sirius' voice called, but she heard him pull up short when he also stepped into the hall.

Derrick's eyes went from Isabella, to Sirius, to the room behind them before his jaw set. When he looked at Isabella again, she nearly recoiled at the fury behind his gaze.

"Dad!" She tried to muster an excited smile. "What are you doing here?"

"Edward told me what happened with James and that you were here. I came with him to make sure you were alright."

As soon as he had said it, Isabella heard Mr. Potter's and the Mediwizard's voices coming from James' room.

"Hello, Mr. Williams," Sirius said, and Isabella could hear a touch of anxiety in his voice.

Derrick acknowledged Sirius with a cold gaze and stern nod. He looked back to Isabella.

"We're going home."

"Of course." Her voice was shaking, barely above a whisper.

"_Now_."

Isabella nodded. She took off behind Derrick as he led the way down the hall towards the stairs. She began to look back at Sirius but caught herself, for what was she seeking from him? An apology, reassurance? He had just said, in so many words, that she was only another burden in his already complicated life.

The desire to cry consumed her again, but she repressed it, squared her shoulders, and kept her gaze forward. She couldn't even muse that it had been fun while it lasted.

* * *

**A/N: About a month after I posted the last chapter, I suffered a very sudden and unexpected family tragedy. Everything that did not directly pertain to the safety, wellbeing, and happiness of my immediate family became so inconsequential, especially fan fiction. But I began to rediscover my previous interests towards the end of last year, found this story, and realized how much I missed it. I began to enjoy writing again.**

**I refrained form posting the first outline I filled in over a month ago, not wanting to resume the story just to lose the motivation again. So since then, I've filled in about 5 chapters worth of outlines, so those will be posted over the coming weeks.**

**I apologize for the long delay, but it couldn't be helped. I am sure I've alienated most of my readers with the lack of updates, but I assure those still interested that I have not abandoned this story.**


	21. Love Is a Losing Game

**A/N: Thanks to all of those who continued to read and review despite the previous long hiatus!**

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Lily could not stop laughing. Her face and stomach were sore from uncontrollable hysterics from the past hour, and her mother's own mirth was not helping the situation.

They were looking through the newly arrived proofs from Petunia's wedding, and between the bridesmaid dresses, Vernon resembling a stuffed sausage in his suit, and various relatives from both families caught looking more than displeased with the pairing, Lily was now grateful for the photographers who she initially were annoyed with on the day of.

She couldn't even help giggling at the pictures of herself in the pink monstrosity she was forced to wear; she looked absolutely ridiculous. Sophia had tried to compose herself, but the almost two glasses of wine she had consumed this evening had chipped away at her regard, and even she could not deny how silly the day now looked in photos. Lily could not remember the last time her mother was so carefree.

With Petunia married and making a home with her new husband, Lily had had Sophia all to herself. In the last week and a half, Lily and Sophia had been free to catch up on everything, shop at their favorite boutiques, and enjoy afternoon tea at their beloved corner café without Petunia interjecting herself at every moment. Home was cozy and comfortable without the ever-present tension with Petunia. It had easily been the best holiday from Hogwarts ever.

Except for one thing—she had not heard from Elias. He was in the Greek Isles with his family and had warned her that he'd be able to write only once or twice, but she hadn't received a single letter. She was trying not to take it too personally, for who was to say he simply wasn't busier with his family than expected, or that the cost of Owl Post from there to here was much too expensive? The end of holiday was only a few days away, and they would be back at Hogwarts soon, but she still felt that it was an ominous sign.

She and Elias had left for Easter on good terms, but Lily had been suppressing a bit of hard feelings that were too difficult to ignore once she was home. The awkwardness caused by the whole 'love' debacle had passed, but they had not returned to the same couple they had been before. Sure, they had spent a lot of alone time together since making up; however, Elias was still hesitant to progress their relationship to the next level. He would freely kiss, caress, tease, and taste her, and she would happily reciprocate, but he stopped them every single time it came to the point to move to the next step with endless excuses.

When he said 'I still feel like I'm pressuring you,' Lily had been quite adamant that she didn't at all feel coerced, and when he expressed that 'tonight just doesn't feel right,' she had assured him that he was over thinking it all, but Elias remained resolute. Lily tried to understand, but the frustration he was regularly leaving her with every other night was starting to get to her. She admired Elias very much, but she didn't want to remain in a friendship-like relationship with someone who was not interested in true intimacy with her.

"Lily, dear, will you ever forgive me for putting you at the mercy of Petunia's dress choice?"

Lily glanced up and saw her mother gazing at a picture of her and Petunia in front of their home before leaving for the church. Lily was grimacing, but Petunia was wearing a smug smile, still feeling triumphant over the information she had revealed to Elias regarding Severus. She felt a pang in her stomach at remembering the distress that moment had caused.

"Mum, the fact that you are sitting here laughing at your own daughter's wedding photos is more than enough apology I need."

Sophia lifted a hand to her mouth in shame, but her pursed lips and cheeks red with drink gave her away. They both erupted into another fit of inappropriate laughter.

"Special delivery."

Lily looked up just in time to see Leonard walking into the sitting room with an envelope in hand. She quickly composed herself as relief washed over her.

"When did it come?"

"Just now through the kitchen window. It was delivered by a black owl." He handed the letter to Lily and then eyed Sophia sternly. "Those pictures aren't the cause of the silly schoolgirl giggles I've been hearing for the last hour I hope."

Sophia waved a dismissive hand. "You wouldn't be so quick to judge if you would take a minute to look at them."

Leonard and Sophia continued to banter as the relief Lily initially felt at mention of the letter immediately dissipated. A letter from Greece would not have been delivered by a black owl, which were already rare, and her suspicions were confirmed when she saw the handwriting on the envelope. She tore it open, knowing she wouldn't like a single word it contained, but she had not yet accomplished completely cutting Severus out of her life.

_The playground in an hour._

_-S_

Lily closed her eyes to suppress her anger and annoyance from showing, but she was being dramatic. She could hardly get too mad when she had all intention of going. She wasn't sure if it was the wine, her irritation with Elias, the lingering vestiges of loyalty to Severus, or a mix of all three, but she would go…and _again_ set back the progress she had made with eradicating Severus from her life another few weeks.

"Bad news?" Sophia asked, having noticed Lily's silence.

Lily arranged her face to a neutral expression. "Not at all. Just a letter from Isabella asking if I plan on taking the train back to school."

"Oh, I didn't realize she went home for the holiday as well. You two made no plans to get together? I was hoping to finally meet her."

"She likes spending as much time with her father as possible," Lily said, which was true, but in regard to the current break, it was a lie. Lily could not bear to mention Severus to her parents again, who had taken her lead since she told them they were no longer friends last summer.

"Of course," Sophia answered absently as she showed a few choice pictures to Leonard.

Lily crumpled the letter and stood. "I'm going to write her a quick reply and then head out to bookshop to get a few items."

"Would you like some company?"

"No, it's okay," Lily answered quickly, earning her a searching look from her mother. "It's just a quick trip, picking up a couple of journals."

"Alright, just don't stay out too late."

Lily nodded before heading to her room. It was only after she freshened up and pulled her hair into a neat ponytail that the first inklings of unease hit her. If they had not been in the Muggle world, her meeting with Severus after sundown would be considered unsafe. This could easily be an ambush, but Lily knew she was getting ahead of herself. Why would anyone attack her _now_? She was a Muggle-born, yes, but still in school, and played no role in the fight against Voldemort. He and his minions had bigger fish to fry. Besides, despite the conflict between them, Lily knew Severus would never hurt her or knowingly lead her into danger, and though she had her suspicions of his companions, Severus was not a Death Eater.

But still, as she put on her jacket and grabbed her handbag, she also retrieved her wand from the bedside table and stowed it in an inside pocket. Practicing vigilance did not necessarily imply any fear in Severus' motives.

Minutes later, Lily was out the door and walking towards the town square. The sun had nearly set, and a light wind blew as the streetlamps came on. It was warmer than the last few nights, but the breeze was a reminder that it was still early spring.

As she came upon the square of shops, Lily admired how free she felt. Leaving the magical world behind provided Lily a sense of freedom and buoyancy that was not possible when constantly among wizards and witches that were always watching you over their shoulders. The magical population was so small compared to Muggles that it seemed like everyone knew your business. In the Muggle world, Lily was practically anonymous.

And the lack of propriety among Muggles when compared to wizards was a nice change. Lily loved waking up and pulling on a pair of comfy sweats and dirty trainers to run errands with her mum. She did appreciate the old-fashioned decorum of the Wizarding world, but a break was welcomed every once in a while.

The bookshop had only been an excuse, but once Lily entered, she was drawn by the display of moleskin journals available in new textures. She picked up one in the color of café au lait and admired its suede texture. Its pages were crisp and white, with the signature scent of earth and wood. She wanted it dearly, but she didn't need it. The journal Elias had given her for Christmas wasn't even half full, and that one had the benefit of being magically sealed. At the thought of Elias, Lily sighed and placed the journal back in its place.

Goosebumps suddenly erupted on her skin as she felt eyes watching her. She surreptitiously looked around the semi-crowded shop but found no one paying her any mind. Shaking her head, she brought her attention back to the display, but the uneasy feeling wouldn't relent. When she looked up again, her bright eyes immediately met the dark ones of Severus watching her through the storefront windows.

"Damn him," Lily spat in a low voice. She pulled her bag back across her body and headed for the door. The sun was now completely gone, causing the temperature to drop considerably. Lily raised the collar of her jacket.

"Have you been following me?" she asked as she approached her former friend.

Severus sneered. "Don't flatter yourself. I was walking towards the neighborhood from the train station and happened to catch your hair as I passed. Not difficult to miss." His eyes trailed longingly over her full ponytail before meeting her eyes with coldness again.

"The train? You couldn't Apparate?"

Severus' brow furrowed; if he had been prone to blushing, Lily knew pink would have risen to his cheeks right then. "I was dining with acquaintances in Diagon Alley and enjoyed a few drinks. Didn't want to risk it."

He began walking the path towards their respective homes—his former—and though he did not offer an invitation, Lily knew she was meant to follow.

"London, huh?" she said as she fell into step with him. "Seeing me must be important if you spent money on an owl." She smiled with satisfaction when she saw his jaw set, but it disappeared when he made no snarky remark.

They were soon near the park with the playground, and the sounds of the town center diminished behind them. Severus stopped to survey the area, but Lily kept walking. If the cardinal rule of 'be home before the streetlamps come on' still existed, there would be no kids here. Feeling a sense of nostalgia, she sat upon a swing.

"Wanna see who can jump the highest?" Lily asked, gesturing to the swing beside her. Severus said nothing, and his face remained expressionless. Lily smiled again, knowing she was annoying him.

"Or not," she continued with a shrug. With Severus standing over her, Lily was able to get a good long look at him, and she did not like what she saw.

His clothes were the most luxurious she had ever seen him in—jet-black slacks and a clean white shirt, both starched, pressed, and creased to within an inch of their existence. Fine black leather loafers and belt. Among Muggles, his robes were off, but Lily could tell its woven wool and navy silk lining were of superior quality as they hung on his arm. The last straw, though, were the cufflinks—silver serpents with eyes of tiny emeralds. He was adjusting them in a manner she had seen Sirius Black do on a countless number of occasions, but Severus lacked the necessary conceit that such a gesture demanded.

She scoffed as her eyes reached his face, still the same despite the other improvements—pale, thin, and surrounded by a greasy curtain of chin-length black hair.

"Really, now. Cufflinks, Severus?"

His eyes widened and his hands dropped quickly back to his sides as if burned. "They were a—"

"Gift from Lucius, yes, I assumed as much," Lily interrupted with a dismissive wave of her hand. "And you think wearing Madam Malkin's finest is going elevate you to Malfoy's level? Just like they don't ever let me forget _my _status, they won't ever let you forget yours. You're smarter than that, Severus."

"I wish to be nothing more than myself, and it has been more than enough for Lucius and his colleagues."

"Then why do you let them dress you up like a puppet?" She then shook her head and lifted a hand. "Wait, don't even bother. I don't care. What do you want?"

The abrupt change in subject appeared to have caught Severus off guard. His hands went to fiddle with his cufflinks again, but he immediately stilled them. Lily wondered what was making him so fidgety; the unknown made her anxious. But then the most horrific thought flashed across her mind and drove her to her feet.

"Severus, what did you do?"

Her shaking but sharp voice startled him. He examined her face before comprehension dawned on him.

"Nothing."

_Yet_, Lily added in her mind, but she wasn't sure if she believed him.

"Then what!" she demanded, throwing her hands up in the air. "What do you want? The last time we spoke, you said my opinion counted for nothing, so why even summon me for anything?"

At her frustration, the airs Severus had been attempting to assume since the beginning of their meeting dissipated. He flinched as if wanting to grab her hands, but he restrained himself and cleared his throat. When Lily met his gaze, she could see trepidation in his black eyes, and despite the exterior refinement, she only saw the boy of ten who would come running for her company and rudimentary nursing when he took the brunt of his father's dangerous temper.

"Severus, please. Tell me."

He closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. The intensity in his gaze when he opened his eyes again slightly scared her.

"I just want you to know that whatever happens, whatever you hear, all the decisions I make from here are for you. I need you to understand that." There was no overt affection in his voice, but Lily knew what it meant.

"What decisions?" she asked warily.

"That's not important right now."

Lily glared at him. "'Not important?' I don't want to be the motivation behind you taking Voldemort's mark!" She then clapped a hand to her mouth when she realized she had spoken the forbidden name, her eyes darting around in anticipation of Death Eaters surrounding them. When Severus' expression did not change and no one came to attack her, disbelief joined the unadulterated terror already coursing through her.

"You don't deny it," she whispered. Tears sprang to her eyes.

"I don't deny or confirm anything," Severus said flatly. "Just know that I have only your safety and wellbeing in mind when you hear the worst of me."

Lily shook her head and the tears began to fall. "No, Severus, no. I won't let you rationalize this. I could forgive you for last summer, over time I could. But not—if you join—if you dare become a…I would _never_ forgive you. You would be lower than nothing to me, and if I came across hard evidence, I would report you faster than you would believe…to Dumbledore, to the Ministry, to whomever I needed to."

Severus looked as if he had been slapped in the face. "Our history counts for nothing." It was not a question.

"_Nothing_. It didn't for you when you called me a Mudblood, did it? Joining the very group of people who want to see me dead, and you expect me to understand? You disgust me."

He took the dig in stride and assumed his unearned airs again. "I don't expect you to understand now, but you will. Promise me you'll try." He then threw his robes over his shoulders, turned, and headed back towards the town center.

Lily watched him go in total incredulity as the anger started to build at his pretention. The wind picked up suddenly and chilled the tears on her cheeks; she hastily wiped them away. She was failing at her promise to never again cry over Severus.

But this was different. She had speculated of course, based on the changes over the past couple years, the new friends, his association with Malfoy, and the slur he had hurled at her so many months ago. But she had been clinging to the hope that this war would resolve itself before they left school, that the Light side would win, and that there would be no reason to choose a side.

How naïve she had been. This war had been brewing under the notice of the general Wizarding population for a long time before finally breaking the surface last fall, and it didn't appear to have an end in sight. Lily knew where she stood, but she didn't know if she was supposed to be doing something about it. There was a group of Slytherins who, although most likely not Death Eaters yet, were working for what they believed in; why wasn't she? Where was the group of students spreading the message of acceptance of all magical and Muggle people and the utter futility of blood status?

And for that matter, where was the group of fully trained witches and wizards fighting for the Light side? The Ministry had proven itself mostly inept as they were still deciding who among them were Voldemort's wolves in sheep's clothing. She suddenly remembered McGonagall vaguely referring to a 'we' the morning she learned of Harrieta's death. Lily would ask her about it as soon as she returned to school, though she wondered if she had earned enough respect from her Head of House to broach such a subject.

She reached her front steps sooner than she expected and plastered a smile on her face as she opened the door. Her parents' laughter rang from the sitting room, and Lily could tell that her father had joined her mother in revelry.

"I'm back, Mum and Dad." She bypassed the room and went straight for the stairs, not wanting to give her mother the opportunity to detect her heavy mood.

"Find anything good?" Sophie called.

Lily paused on the first step. "Not a thing. I'm turning in early; I'm a bit tired. Goodnight."

"Oh, yes, alright dear—oh that hair!" Sophie exclaimed, already distracted. Leonard joined her in laughter. Lily, gratefully forgotten, shook her head with a smile and headed for her room. It wasn't until she closed her bedroom door and turned on the light that she noticed the large bird sitting on her windowsill.

"Jesus!" she breathed, clutching her chest. Another few seconds passed before she processed that it was not an owl, with its bright white body and colorful head plumage.

"A cockatoo? But—" She gasped again with delight. This bird could not have come from anywhere north of the Mediterranean. "Elias!"

She rushed over and untied the letter on its left leg, but before she could admire its feathers, it flew off into the night. Lily shrugged and ripped open the envelope. A quick glance at the stiff parchment extinguished her elation as swiftly as blowing out a candle.

_I think it best that we see other people._

The letter had obviously been rushed. There had been no time for a date, greeting, or regards, but she knew it was his hand, despite its cramped composition. She swallowed against the choking lump forming in her throat and read the words again.

With a stifled cry, she collapsed upon the floor and dissolved into alternating fits of hysterical sobbing and laughter.

* * *

_In and out. _James reminded himself. _Slowly. In and out_.

He was working overtime to control his breathing. He refused to display any of the distress he was feeling, not for the audience that had collected for the evening.

James was currently sitting in his father's office at the Ministry of Magic and trying to ignore the hustle and bustle of employees beyond the doorway and concentrate on why he was here. Today was the last day he would ever see his mother before she most likely forgot she ever had a son.

"I've decided to let my men reverse the _Imperious_ curse," his father had told him yesterday evening while home on a short break from the Ministry. He and Sirius had been sitting on the porch off the kitchen when Edward asked for a word with his son alone.

James had only nodded in response, as his anger towards his father had dissipated into exhausted resignation just the day before. For two days after regaining his strength and wits from his overindulgence, James had raged at his father in a manner he didn't think himself capable of—for not telling him that his mother was in Ministry custody and the gravity of her current state, for letting some Junior Auror scum be the one to tell him. Though Edward had apologized for the lapse in judgment, James had found it easier to continue seething rather than think about his mum. It had taken a good knock about the head and stern talking to from Sirius, of all people, for James to calm down and see the issue from his father's prospective.

"Would you like to see her before it's done?" Edward had continued.

"Of course. And what happens to her afterward?

Edward had thought silently for a moment. "It depends on how deeply her memory is damaged. Her magic should not be affected; that's innate, and I don't think even Voldemort has created a curse powerful enough to destroy someone's magic. But it can affect her basic knowledge—everything she learned at Hogwarts. If that's the case, she will need extensive rehabilitation. And there's no way to know _whom_ she will remember. She will need 24-hour care on a ward until she regains magical skills and general knowledge of who she is and her surroundings."

"Please, not at St. Mungo's." James had remembered his friends speaking of the misery of the long-term wards at St. Mungo's—Peter's grandmother lived there for three years and died there after breaking both hips that were too badly damaged to repair; Remus spent three months on a children's ward after his werewolf bite. He shuddered at the thought of his mother living out the rest of her days there.

"Of course not! One of the many perks of having money and influence in this blasted world is the ability to procure the best of care. She will live at the Wenlock Home for Long-Term Care in Brighton; I think she'll like being near the water again."

Edward's decision had not been shared with anyone else, as he thought it would draw too much attention to James' visit. However, that had not mattered. Word had spread through the department of Magical Law Enforcement and beyond that the Chief Auror's son was visiting his cursed mother. They had come afterhours, and while a small staff of mostly Hit Wizards and Magical Maintenance were employed through the night, more wizards than normal happened to be around 'finishing up projects' or 'tidying up their desks.'

"A crock of shit," Edward had muttered as they went through security in the Atrium with several eyes watching them. "They're all just nosy buggers."

"What's taking so bloody long?"

James looked over at Sirius, who was as surly as ever. He had taken a few shots of the remaining scotch before coming, but James had not partaken in anything since his poisoning. He wasn't naïve enough to think he would never drink again, but he knew a break from alcohol was well overdue.

"I suspect there are some forms that must be tended to before we can see her," James answered, shrugging, "or maybe Dad is waiting in hopes a few more people will leave."

Sirius scoffed. "Forms for what? Your dad is _Chief Auror_, your mum is the prisoner, and you're their son; there should be no formalities necessary to see your own family. And as for waiting—" he sneered again "—we might as well go back home if he thinks people are going to leave. They may not get to witness your meeting directly, but they'll be the first to hear the scoop from the few who must be there, and people love being privy to others' misery as soon as possible."

James rolled his eyes; Sirius' rants had been nonstop since the wedding. James knew that the news about Clarice was a big part of that, and justifiably so, and that the other part was due to whatever had transpired between him and Isabella that evening. But Sirius had not shared the details, and James did not care enough at the moment to ask for them. He was just happy that he had not shared Edward's decision with Sirius, as he could not imagine the attitude he would have to put up with if he had. His father had put the onus of whether or not to tell Sirius on him, and James had kept the plan from his best friend. Selfish as it seemed, this last moment with his mother was something he wanted to experience without Sirius' sympathy. Sirius and the rest of the Wizarding world would learn in due time, and the ensuing attention would be suffocating.

Another 20 minutes passed with Sirius grumbling under his breath and James failing to keep memories of his mother out of his mind. Just when he thought he wouldn't be able to wait any longer, Edward walked in.

"Alright, the Minister has given his clearance. Let's go."

_Slowly. In and out_.

They made their way into the corridors as several Aurors stole glances. Sirius swaggered about glaring at everyone, but James kept his eyes forward, ignoring them. He tried to anticipate what he would say to his mother, how she would respond, how much time they would get, if they would get to speak alone.

They came upon a set of lifts that most people outside the department of Magical Law Enforcement did not know existed, which led to the bowels of the Ministry where recent detainees were kept while awaiting trial. The three men rode down without speaking and eventually emerged before an anteroom. James and Sirius were forced to relinquish their wands to the Hit Wizards manning the area before allowed through the large steel door that led to the cells.

The corridors beyond were damp and dark; most of the cells were empty, a mocking testament to Ministry's inability to get a handle on Voldemort's uprising. After a few turns, they reached another door with a sign that read 'High Security.'

"High security?" Sirius demanded of the guards who unlocked the door with their wands. "Clarice Potter, well known philanthropic witch of high society, being kept in a high security cell?"

James' anger mirrored Sirius', but he remained silent.

"It was not my decision," Edward explained as he led them through the doorway.

The cells here were larger but looked no different than the others. Sirius said as much.

"There's more than steel bars and a couple of jinxes keeping the criminals inside here," Edward said.

They turned one last corner and came upon a more secluded cell with four Aurors posted outside. It differed drastically from the others—it was well lit, carpeted, and furnished with a comfortable-looking full bed against the back wall, a desk topped with rolls of parchment, quills, and ink bottles, a well supplied bookcase that spanned from floor to ceiling, and a door that led to what James assumed was a private bathroom, as there was no visible toilet or sink as in the other cells.

Sirius looked to Edward, his eyebrows raised.

Edward smiled. "A high security prisoner but still _my wife_."

Clarice was sitting in an armchair next to the bookcase as classical music streamed from the wireless on the nearby side table. She raised her head at Edward's voice and narrowed her eyes at him. Her gaze shifted, found James, and widened in what James knew was disbelief.

She stood and walked towards the bars. "James? Oh, it _is_ you. My son, my darling son."

James remained where he stood; his throat burned and his eyes stung as he got a full view of his mother. She was wearing a shapeless grey shift dress of some stiff-looking material and looked rail thin beneath it. Over the years, her face had slowly lost its fullness as she aged gracefully, but now it looked simply gaunt and lifeless from whatever Voldemort had put her through. Her hair was up in its customary high bun, but its color, once as black and shiny as his own, had dulled into a wiry grey.

"Come closer now, let me get a good look at you."

Swallowing against the rush of emotion, James slowly approached her, only half-hearing his father's words of caution. He peripherally saw the Aurors look to Edward for direction and subsequently hang back. James wished they would all just leave, but he knew that would never happen.

"Still growing like a weed since I last saw you at Christmas," Clarice said with a smile as James stood immediately before her, "and as handsome as always." Her face suddenly grew solemn. "Oh, James, I worry endlessly about you, so it's assuring to see you look so well; you're father won't share anything about you with me."

James turned back to his father, his expression both confused and irritated, but Edward was not looking at James. He was staring blankly at his wife. James faced his mother again and gave a small smile. "You have nothing to worry about, mum. I've been fine." His voice quavered, but he didn't care.

Clarice's warm eyes filled with tears as she raised her arms between the bars. James closed the remaining space between them and hugged his mother as tightly as the barrier would allow, but he didn't let himself completely lose it. Instead, he concentrated on his breathing and was surprised at how much she smelled of home despite her captivity with Voldemort and now the Ministry. He could feel her heartbeat and was reminded of the times she held him like this as a child when nightmares forced him awake. Feeling another rush of despair coming on, James stepped back from the embrace and smiled weakly at his mother, which she returned as she placed her hands on his shoulders.

"I know it must be difficult to see me in here." James nodded but said nothing, not trusting the strength of his voice anymore. "You must have heard the worst of me from your father and others," she said as she glared at the Aurors behind him.

"I don't believe any of it," James blurted, not wanting to make his mother upset or feel guilty.

"Really? That's a shame," Clarice said, her voice changing sharply as her darkened gaze shifted back to her son, "because you should."

Moving faster than he ever thought her capable of, Clarice closed her hands over James' throat with an iron grip. James grabbed at her hands on instinct but failed to loosen them. Shouts sounded behind him, but he was already losing consciousness. His eyes filled with tears as he watched his mother's face twist into a mask of evil as she tried to squeeze the life out of him. That face would haunt his dreams until the day he died.

"CAREFUL NOT TO HURT MY SON!"

James could vaguely hear the spells and see the sparks he knew were being directed at his mother. His lungs burned and his head pounded, both desperate for air that would not come. Just as his eyes began to roll backwards, he fell to his bum as Clarice's hands jerked away from his neck, and heard a resounding crash and scream.

"James!" Sirius was suddenly beside him with a hand on his arm to keep him from falling over.

He struggled to regain control of his breathing, but he was shaking too violently; the world around him went in and out of focus as he repeatedly drowned in enveloping darkness and found consciousness again.

"You've got to be calm for a minute. Breathe deeply, slowly."

_Slowly. In and out._

After a few seconds that felt like hours, the tightness in James' chest loosened. His head was still throbbing, but he regained his focus. He first turned to Sirius, who was as white as a sheet.

"You alright, mate?"

James nodded and then looked up at his father. Edward's wand arm was still aloft, trembling slightly. James followed its path and saw that his mother had been thrown against the bookcase before falling to the floor. She now lay in a crumpled heap of books and torn parchment, unmistakably Stunned.

"Where are the other Aurors?" James asked after realizing the three of them were alone.

Edward lowered his arm. "I sent them off to notify the other guards. Besides the shields they tried to cast between you and Clarice, they weren't going to be much help. They're afraid to perform any major jinxes when I'm around—she's still my wife and I'm still their boss in their heads." He then turned to face James, his eyes hard but his expression unreadable. "Do you now see why I made my decision? I didn't think something this serious would happen, but I had to have you witness what she has become for yourself; I don't want you thinking that I am choosing this option without considering your input or your feelings."

"I understand." His voice choked; the thought of his mother trying to kill him finally settled in deep. His eyes burned; he closed them tight and turned away.

"What decision have you made?" Sirius asked, his own voice quiet and hesitant.

"We're breaking the _Imperious_ curse—"

"And effectively destroying her memory in the process," Sirius interrupted sadly. "I see why we came today."

"Son, can you stand?"

"I think so."

Sirius again grabbed James' arm tightly above the elbow and helped him up. James kept his eyes closed for a moment while he recovered his balance. When he opened them, he saw his father standing before him.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Edward asked as he gingerly touched James' neck where Clarice had strangled him. James flinched, as the area was actually quite tender. "Hmm, a little bruising might develop too, but nothing a glamour charm can't hide to keep the inquiries to a minimum. I'll have the MediWizard on call check you out before heading home." He then walked past them away from the cell without a look back.

The boys followed, but James hesitated before turning the corner into the main corridor. He glanced back at the cell, at the shell of his mother sprawled on the ground. He had not truly appreciated how evil Voldemort was until today. In the scheme of war, it made sense to order Clarice to kill off as many ranking enemies as possible, but her own son? That made no sense; it would only serve to hurt his father, as James was no one important in the fight against Voldemort. James was sure that had the Minister's daughter been in his place, Clarice would have attempted to kill her as well.

And _that_ is what was really depraved about it all—the killing of innocents for killing's sake. Voldemort didn't care who was in his way as he tried to forge a path to victory. If you weren't openly for Voldemort, you were automatically against him, and therefore, only an obstacle to be eliminated.

_The end justifies the means_, James thought darkly, remembering one of the more enjoyable Muggle Studies lectures about politics during the Renaissance.

James didn't yet know his role in all of this, but he knew that if he were to survive it, he'd have to confront injustices, like his mother, head on and keep moving. _This was war_, not a child's game of gobstones. The mother he knew was dead, and the mistake of continuing to grieve for that which was forever lost could mean the difference between life and death if he was ever caught off guard like that again.

Maybe one day his mother would remember him again…and maybe she wouldn't. He couldn't worry about that now. With his heart still heavy, he turned his back on the cell. He had turned 17 nearly a month ago, but not until this moment had he felt like a wizard-of-age in mind and spirit.

* * *

"Sorry I took so long!"

Isabella smiled as Lily came storming through the compartment door, ripped off her school robes, and plopped onto the opposite seat.

"Hasn't been too long," Isabella said, glancing at her watch. The Hogwarts Express had left King's Cross only 20 minutes ago. "Couldn't have been a proper meeting if already over though."

Lily shook her head as she kicked off her shoes. "No need, the train is only half full. The Head Boy and Girl are on, so they've taken the responsibility of patrolling, thank God. I am definitely not in the mood."

"And that works for me; I would have been bored out of my mind had you have to endlessly patrol."

"Ah, it would have been for only 15 minutes at a time. I would have been alone the entire day had you not decided to take the train back." Lily gave a grateful smile before looking at Isabella suspiciously. "Why _did_ you decide to take the train back? Not that I'm not happy—I nearly cried when I received your letter yesterday asking if I'd be on—but I was still surprised. I had no idea you were at home."

Isabella bit her lip. "It's a long story, which begins with Peter's mom's wedding last weekend. But I think you may have a story of your own to share. Why would _you_ be alone when I know a certain someone went home for Easter and even saw him on the platform earlier?"

Some of the color drained from Lily's face as her mouth set in a line. Isabella was instantly confused, but an inkling of what Lily's face meant gnawed at the back of her mind.

"Lily, what happened?"

She rubbed her hands harshly across her face. "I don't even really know," Lily sighed. She spun to kneel on the seat, reached above her, and grabbed her satchel from the luggage rack. She fished through it for a moment before producing a folded note. "I don't know why I've been carrying this around, but…" she trailed off shrugging as she held it out.

Isabella took it from her outstretched hand and quickly read the single line.

_I think it best that we see other people._

Her heart gripped for her friend, but she wanted to make sure. Isabella flipped the note around, saw it was blank, and looked up at Lily with raised eyebrows. Lily's face was still pale and anxious.

"It's from Elias."

"But there are no names. How do you know?"

"He was in Greece; it was delivered by a rather exotic bird. And I know his writing."

Isabella sat back against her seat and glanced at the writing again. "Then our holidays were more alike than originally thought."

"Huh?"

"Later," Isabella said, shaking her head. She handed the note back to Lily. "But why? I thought you two were doing so well."

"We were, though I am sure it looked better from the outside." Lily closed her eyes, looking as if she were thinking back over the last few weeks. "After sorting out that whole 'love' thing, things were just okay; we never returned to how we were before, like back in fall term. _I_ was rather happy with things, but Elias…it felt as if he were just going through the motions at times, and he still wouldn't, uh, you know, with me." Her cheeks were now flaming.

"Why do you think that is?"

"No idea. After making up, he must have realized that he didn't care for me as much anymore, but he kept going along probably because I did. And why not? I mean, we're just teenagers having fun. This didn't have to be some sweeping romance."

Isabella wanted to believe Lily's levity, but her tone didn't match her body language. "True, but that still doesn't justify ending things through a note."

"I think it's because he was about to cheat on me," Lily blurted out. Her entire face was now flushed; Isabella thought it was from shame.

"How do you work that out?"

"I don't think it's too far fetched," Lily said, now fiddling with the hem of her skirt. "He was in the Greek Isles, beaches full of beautiful girls in bikinis, lots of temptation. People have holiday flings all the time. But Elias is more courteous than most of the boys our age; he'd be the type to make sure we were broken up before doing anything that would make him an actual cheater."

Isabella frowned at Lily's excuses for Elias. "More courteous than most? If Elias thinks ditching you through a note is sufficient enough then he's as bad as the rest."

"I know, I know!" Lily said, now wiping tears from her eyes. "It's just…I mean, what's so terrible about _me_? He made every excuse not to have sex with me after being together for six months, but he's in Greece for less than two weeks and gives it up? Because he wouldn't have paid for post from that far if he was planning to only snog a couple of girls."

For a moment, Isabella didn't know what to say. Most of what Lily said made sense. She wasn't necessarily upset over being dumped, just the reason why it was done, how it was done.

Isabella didn't know much about Lily's relationship with Severus Snape, but from the bits of information she had garnered from Keira and Jane, Isabella concluded that their relationship ended when Severus chose his Slytherin mates over Lily, their five-year friendship, and growing intimacy. Lily had given Severus all she had, and he had still abandoned her, and now Elias had done the same. It didn't matter how secure one was with herself; Isabella could understand how Lily would feel inadequate right now.

"He just seemed so different than the others," Lily said after a long pause, her voice still thick with emotion.

"He's a teenage wizard; the ass in him was going to come out at one time or another," Isabella said kindly. "And it's usually a girl and listening to his dick over his brain that brings it out." She then considered something. "You didn't see Elias at the meeting?"

Lily shook her head. "Grace Harrington, another Hufflepuff Prefect, said he was not feeling well." She rolled her eyes. "But I do plan on seeking him out when we get back."

"As you should; you deserve an explanation." Isabella smiled as Lily's face melted into a frown that said she'd rather take her N.E.W.T.s 50 times over before confronting her ex-boyfriend.

She then wiped the remaining tears from her cheeks before clearing her throat and giving Isabella a look that told her it was her turn to spill.

"Yeah, I know," Isabella sighed, "but I'm going to need a drink if I'm to get through this entire story."

Lily shook her head as Isabella knew she would. "Not on the train; too easy to get caught."

"I don't have anything to drink anyways," Isabella laughed. She instead reached for her purse and pulled out a large bag she had stuffed with treats from her candy stash at home. After dumping its contents on the floor, she slid down and gestured for Lily to join her. They sat cross-legged and dived shamelessly into a pile of Chocolate Frogs. "I much prefer this anyways."

After two Frogs and a Fizzing Whizbee, Isabella finally began her story. She started with her and Sirius' trip to her mother's grave and their tryst in the common room, and ended with the day of Peter's mum wedding—Sirius' attitude, their fight, and James' alcohol poisoning.

"Wait, wait," Lily said, waving her hand. "First the easy one; why was James drinking so damn much in the first place?"

With a heavy sigh, Isabella explained. "Because he found out that his mother had been recovered by the ministry about a week prior but his father hadn't told him yet. And she's under an _Imperious_ curse set by Voldemort himself."

"Don't say his name," Lily whispered fiercely before the rest of the information hit her. "An _Imperious_ curse?"

Isabella ignored Lily's admonition and continued. "Yes, which has caused a multitude of complications." She then relayed all that she had learned from her father about Mrs. Potter that night after returning home. She had been crying by the time Derrick had finished, her heart broken for James, Mr. Potter, and Sirius.

"Poor James."

"Poor James?" Isabella repeated dubiously.

"Doesn't matter how much I can't stand him," Lily said defensively. "I wouldn't wish what he's going through on my worst enemy." After a pause, she said, "So about the other thing…with Sirius. Are you broken up?"

The licorice wand in Isabella's mouth lost all flavor at the thought of her relationship with Sirius actually being done. "I don't know. I did say I was sick of waiting for him…"

"…but he pursued you as you left. What do you think would have happened had your father hadn't been there?" Isabella shrugged. "What would you have _hoped_ happened?"

"I'm not going to lie—I'd hoped we had made up. I know it seems crazy to you, but I still want to be with him. I like him; I'm infatuated with him." Isabella gave an exasperated sigh as she became more and more annoyed with herself now that she was hearing herself try to explain her feelings out loud. It always made more sense in her head. "Despite the fact that he sometimes isn't the warmest, I still feel as if we're not done yet. God, I'm an idiot."

"No, you're a 17-year-old young woman," Lily said with an understanding smile. "Witch or Muggle—it doesn't matter; we all go through these type of relationships at least once and do our best to justify them. Me and Severus?" She shook her head. "I've seen it in both worlds. But you're not hanging on to try to change him are you?"

"No!" Isabella said indignantly. That was one thing she had prided herself on—that she had no intention of molding Sirius into someone he was not meant to be. She was sure it was what separated her from his previous girlfriends, and why, she believed, Sirius kept making an effort to be with her.

With a nod, Lily asked, "So you haven't talked at all since that night? You didn't try to contact him?"

"Ha!" Isabella slumped against the seat as she tore open another Chocolate Frog and bit off its head. "Oh, I tried to see him after my father told me about Mrs. Potter. With Mr. Potter having to go back to work and James passed out, I didn't think it best for Sirius to be alone, but my father was too angry with me to let me leave that night…or the rest of the break."

"_You want to tell me what that was all about?" Derrick had demanded once they had both stepped into their sitting room from the fireplace._

"_Dad, it was nothing," Isabella answered at once._

"_Nothing?" His tone was skeptical. "I see my daughter wearing the particular set of dress robes I have never been fond of come out of a bedroom with her boyfriend, who I really don't know well and never was a fan of—" Isabella had rolled her eyes at that comment "—after who knows how many hours alone."_

"_Dad!" She hadn't meant to yell, but she didn't want him to continue along this uncomfortable train of thought. "I promise you that nothing happened. Actually, the complete opposite of what _I hope you are not thinking_ took place. You may be able to put your new 'Sirius must die' campaign on hold." She hadn't meant to add the last bit in, but she knew it would help steer the conversation away from things she did not want her father thinking about._

_Once she saw Derrick relax, she had continued. "I want to go back to the Potters'."_

"_Absolutely not."_

"_If Mr. Potter did tell Sirius, he shouldn't be left alone." She had set her shoulders when Derrick's jaw clenched. "Dad, regardless of whatever our current status is, I have to at least make sure he is okay. If you trust _me_, you won't need to worry about what Sirius may or may not do."_

But Derrick had still forbid her, and had made her stay home the rest of break. Isabella had felt 14-years-old again at being grounded for something that didn't even happen. She was as angry with her father as she had been back in the fall when she learned the truth about her mother's death and that Derrick had kept it from her.

Taking the train back to school and getting away from home and him had been a blessing. They were originally scheduled to Apparate together, but that would mean Isabella having to sit around at home seething all day until her father returned in the late afternoon to accompany her. Isabella had lied that she had too much work to finish before school started again to sit around at home the last day of holiday. When he suggested the Floo, Isabella countered that setting up a secure line could potentially take as much time as she would be waiting around to Apparate. Isabella then reluctantly offered to take the Hogwarts Express, but she grew pleased with the idea after confirming that Lily was still planning to take the train as well.

"Don't worry, my parents would have acted the same way had they found me—"

"Fully clothed with your equally fully clothed boyfriend in a room with the door open?"

Lily chuckled. "I know. It was unfair. But you didn't hear from Sirius at all?"

"No. I wrote him immediately after my father set the wards and went back to work. I didn't know if he was still at home or at Hogwarts. I sent Benjy to both places, but I didn't get a response either way." Isabella's throat burned a little but she kept the rush of tears—that had been normal over the past few days every time she thought about it—at bay.

"Well, you'll need to confront him when we return," Lily said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, yeah."

The rest of the train ride passed with gossip as rainclouds began to darken the northern horizon. They wondered what other couples would be broken up by holiday flings and if the Ravenclaw girls were still in a fight. Keira, who had stayed at Hogwarts the entire time, would share if anything crazy or particularly juicy happened, but they _definitely_ planned on interrogating her first about all the alone time she spent with Remus.

They finally reached Hogsmeade Station hours later stuffed with candy and ready for real food. After pleading a little, Isabella helped Lily avoid Elias, as Lily didn't want to seek him out on the platform with an eager audience. They secured an empty carriage and took it up to the castle without wait for other students and went straight into the Great Hall for dinner.

Keira, Jane, nor the boys were around. Isabella enjoyed her dinner, but Lily seemed guarded. She constantly looked over her shoulder and glanced hard at the Hufflepuff table several times.

"What's the matter?" Isabella asked through a mouthful of roasted potatoes.

Lily looked abashed and turned her attention back to her plate. "I keep hearing my name; I know they're whispering about me."

"Of course they're whispering about you." Lily looked up indignantly, but Isabella continued. "In the short time I've been here, I've learned that the students of Hogwarts love nothing more than a break up. And if they already know the true nature of yours and Elias', then they are especially in heaven. Don't worry, I'll be next."

Lily grimaced at Isabella's dark flippancy but finished her meal in silence.

They left the Great Hall a little while later, ignoring the real or imagined whispers trailing after them. Lily was desperate to reach Gryffindor Tower, but for Isabella, it meant a greater risk of running into Sirius.

The level of anxiety that consumed her with every step surprised even her. She badly wanted to see Sirius but was trembling at what could potentially transpire between them. Her heart was pounding so hard and her breathing was so shallow by the time they reached the Fat Lady that Isabella nearly screamed when the portrait swung open and James stepped out.

"James! Hi!" Isabella said shakily. Lily stared incredulously at her but didn't speak. "I…it's good to see you looking so well after…"

"Yeah," James said, looking a little embarrassed. "Thanks, for you know, helping out. But I have to take care of some things, so I'll see you later." He walked on without acknowledging Lily.

Isabella closed her eyes and took a deep breath, feeling a little discomfited herself now. When she opened her eyes, she nearly jumped again, as Sirius was now coming through. Her breath caught in her throat.

"Sirius, I…" But she trailed off when Sirius walked between her and Lily without a word, without a glance. Isabella turned to watch him catch up with James as tears welled in her eyes and her chest tightened.

"Bastard," Lily spat before grabbing Isabella's arm. "Come on. You're not falling apart over bloody Sirius Black in the corridors."

Isabella followed Lily into the common room and upstairs. The tears began to fall, but she did not attempt to wipe them away. She felt like such a fucking fool; Sirius had played her just like they all had warned her.

When they opened the door to their dormitory, Isabella was surprised to see Keira and Jane lounging about.

"There you guys are!" Keira greeted. "We had an early dinner and have been waiting for you guys." She then looked guiltily at Lily. "We heard some news."

"I need firewhisky," Lily said flatly as she walked to her trunk and began to unpack.

Jane smiled wickedly as she stood from her bed. "Now that is the last thing I expected to hear from you, but I am more than happy to oblige." She fished through her own trunk and extracted a brand new bottle of Ogden's Old Firewhisky. "And by the look of Isabella, it seems her holiday wasn't any better than Lily's."

Isabella returned Jane's nasty smile with a glare, but she couldn't deny that drinking herself into oblivion sounded fantastic right now.

"Wait, what?" Keira looked from Jane to Isabella, who was brushing her tears away. "Isabella," Keira said softly, "did something happen after Remus and I left the Potters'?"

Isabella had walked to her bedside table and was now fiddling with her miniature dragons. "Not now, Keira. Please."

"Alright, not now." Keira's tone told Isabella that she had all intention of bringing it up later.

The crack of the firewhisky being opened brought cheers from Jane and Keira.

"You first, Lily. You need it most."

Isabella looked over in time to see Lily scowling at Jane but accept the bottle with fervor. She drank straight from it, reminding Isabella of the night they found James and Sirius in the common room sharing a bottle of vodka. She smiled and shook her head, but was immediately distracted by a piece of parchment that caught her eye. It was tucked between two pillows on the far side of the bed, hidden from the others but meant to be seen by her. Having an idea of whom it was from, Isabella grabbed and opened it with trembling fingers.

_Astronomy Tower. Midnight._

Anger instantly pulsed through her. So Sirius thought he could talk to her as viciously as he wanted, ignore her letters, and brush her aside when she's standing right in front of him but then summon her through a fucking note when he felt like acknowledging her?

"That fucking arrogant selfish prick."

"Isabella?"

She looked up at Lily's voice to see all three girls staring at her. "It's nothing. Pass the bottle."

"With pleasure," Keira said as she quickly climbed over two beds to hand it to Isabella. She then pulled her wand from her back pocket and waved it at the wireless. The voice of Dervish Spur came blasting through the speakers to the delight of all of them.

"Just perfect," Isabella said to herself before gulping down whisky until her stomach burned. "And fuck you," she added as she crumbled the note in her hand and tossed it out the window. She took one last pull from the bottle before holding it high. "Who's next?"


	22. Fighting Temptations

**A/N 1: I realized what an ungracious author I've been. I want to sincerely thank everyone for their generous reviews. In particular, I would like to thank Gaia who has persisted through my personal and grad school-induced hiatuses. I promise this story isn't near finished and I am not abandoning it. Enjoy!**

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**A/N 2: This chapter contains adult content.**

* * *

"Fuck."

Sirius glanced at his watch, already knowing the time having just looked at it a few seconds ago. He glared up at the nearly full moon. It was well past 1 AM; Isabella had no intention of meeting him.

"Fuck."

He had feared he'd gone too far this time, and Isabella's absence confirmed it. He took out his flask of chocolate-infused cognac and downed half its contents, savoring its rich flavor and the warmth it spread throughout his body. The springtime night air this far north was still colder than he liked, especially on the exposed Astronomy Tower.

The question was why had he let things go so far. He didn't mean to treat Isabella so horribly, but, Goddamn it, it was difficult keeping his cool when he felt like he was being pulled in a million different directions. Between dealing with James, his own anger and grief over Clarice, and rising tensions in the castle, finding time for Isabella was not always a priority or even possible.

Trying to be the considerate boyfriend wasn't always fun, either. There were many evenings he'd have rather spent listening to Quidditch matches on the wireless and sipping mead with his mates than wandering about with Isabella. He also didn't think they had to eat every meal together or sit with each other in every class. The expectations of girls in this school were sometimes suffocating, and out of nowhere, Sirius was instantly jealous of Garret and all the other boys at Garret's school who were able to have lives physically separate from their girlfriends.

But then Sirius shook his head. It hadn't all been bad.

He had appreciated having Isabella within his reach after hearing about Clarice; her company had been invaluable. Even before that incident, knowing he had someone to go to when he needed a break from his normal circle was a comfort. Intellectually, she was his equal, which was much more than he could say about his previous girlfriends. She was smart and witty, and Sirius found himself feeling less stressed during those times he relaxed his ego and let her in.

And he couldn't deny the physical aspect. Isabella was simply stunning, and he craved her body more than he cared to admit. He reveled in the frenzy his body went into whenever she touched him and, better yet, when she let him reciprocate.

So what was he to do?

Sirius recognized that he had been having this incessant internal battle since the moment he recognized his attraction to her, and the worst of it had shown from time to time through a bit of surliness or disregard. But he had been fortunate enough that Isabella was able to take most of it in stride and forgive his lapses into asshole-dom. He knew that if he were lucky enough to rein her back in this time, though, it would be the last. He had a feeling that Isabella had enough pride to move on from where she wasn't wanted, and there were plenty of guys, idiots mostly, who he knew were waiting and would love nothing more than to scoop her up. And that made him grit his teeth. It was a selfish thought, Sirius knew, but Isabella was _his_.

He needed to make a change, but he admittedly didn't know how to do it. However, Sirius knew who _would_ know, and asking _him_ was not going to make this process any easier.

With a long exhale, Sirius turned for the door and made his way down the staircase and towards Gryffindor Tower. Several minutes later he was opening the door to his dormitory. Besides his own, only one other bed was empty, though it was no surprise. James had sought out Delilah the moment they had finished their late dinner in the kitchens last night, and considering that the _Daily Prophet_ had broken the story about Clarice two days ago, Sirius didn't think James was going to let Delilah go anytime soon.

Walking straight ahead to the bed two over from his own, Sirius steeled himself and opened the curtains to find Remus tangled in his sheets. He frowned—Remus always slept wildly the days before the full moon. Sirius always wondered what Remus dreamed about these nights as his lycanthropy began to take hold of his body, but Sirius had never felt comfortable enough to ask, and Remus had never offered to share.

"Hey," Sirius said with a shove of Remus' shoulder. He jerked awake and looked around in confusion before his eyes adjusted to the low light from the dying fire. When he found Sirius standing over him, Remus sat up quickly.

"Is something wrong? Is it Prongs?"

"No, no. I just had a question. I, er, need some advice."

Remus glared at him. "Advice that, for anyone else, could have waited until the morning, but for _you_, must be addressed now because you get what you want when you want it."

Now that his own eyes had adjusted to the darkness, Sirius could see how pale and clammy his friend was. This was common this close to the full moon—Remus' body was sucking the life from his human form to preserve for his wolf form. It made him irritable, tired, and somewhat weaker than usual, but strong, feral, and fierce when the change consumed him. Sirius now felt a pang of guilt at waking Remus, knowing how important his rest was, but he had also known Remus would act in this way and throw his entitlement issues in his face, so he pushed his remorse aside played into Remus' attitude. "Naturally," he said with a smirk and a nod.

"What is it?" Remus sighed, resigned.

"I, uh—" Sirius halted and then closed his mouth. Admitting to a fault that he once considered an advantage, a _necessity_ really, was leaving a bad taste in his mouth. Remus began to show signs of impatience as Sirius' silence persisted. "I need advice on how to be a…a better boyfriend."

Remus stared blankly at him for a second before his brows knit together in apparent disbelief. "Being a better boyfriend has never been a concern before."

"No."

"Well, knowing Isabella and comparing her to the likes of Daphne or Jane, I can see why you'd _want_ to try, but I also know _you_, Sirius. You need to determine what it is about Isabella that is spurring you to make a change and if it is enough to sustain it for longer than a couple of days, because she doesn't deserve being taken for a ride on a bucking broomstick."

Sirius's face burned a little in shame, but he was sure Remus hadn't paid attention that closely to his and Isabella's relationship. Keira was probably sharing his transgressions over pillow talk. For some reason, that upset Sirius more than Remus witnessing firsthand.

But then he considered Remus' first piece of advice. "Isabella is worth—"

"_I_ don't care to hear it," Remus interrupted with a raise of his hand. "Just figure it out on your own and then decide if you want to follow my instruction or not."

"Right. So what do I need to do?"

"Talk to her."

Sirius nodded, trying to keep his retort to himself; _that_ was obvious. He waited for Remus to continue, but the latter remained silent. Sirius rolled his eyes. "Yes, _and_?"

"And what? What else do you think you need to do? Buy her all of Honeydukes, or the biggest diamond at Gabby's Gold and Gems to demonstrate your affection? That's too easy and proves nothing. You need to _talk_ to Isabella about _everything_. When you think over all the reasons why you want to be with her, how important she is to you, tell her those things. Apologize and _explain_ why you've been acting like an asshole and how you_ know_ she deserves better. And if you're lucky and she decides to take you back, then you both need to discuss your expectations for your relationship."

None of that sounded fun to Sirius at all. "I don't think I can do all of that."

"Oh?" Remus lifted a brow. "Then I guess you don't want a real relationship either. If you're looking for just another shagging partner to joke around with, then Isabella isn't the girl for you, and you know that. Go back to Daphne or Jane, or give another try with Thalia."

"I don't want that anymore," Sirius said confidently, happy he was sure of at least _that_.

"Then I've got to hand it to you, Padfoot; it means you're maturing. A little late, but—" Remus shrugged "—there it is." He considered Sirius for a moment. "Why don't you think you can?"

Sirius looked away towards Peter's bed, growing suddenly uncomfortable. "Doesn't it…I don't know. Don't you feel weird sharing all of your secrets, so much of yourself with a girl?"

"Who says you need to share everything, give everything _now_? You're acting like you have to propose to Isabella tomorrow, marry on Wednesday, and start a family on Thursday. No one expects that of you, least of all Isabella. It's about building trust over time." Remus then chuckled softly. "And is it weird? It's terrifying. I've never let someone in or grown so close to someone as I have with Keira. I mean, I'm thinking about telling this girl about what I am and—" He stopped and looked at Sirius with a frown, and Sirius knew Remus had not meant to share that, or, really, anything about how he felt about Keira. Not with Sirius at least.

Remus cleared his throat. "All I know is that the way I feel when Keira is around outweighs the anxiety I get when thinking about _being_ with her."

Sirius nodded, again feeling awkward about having this conversation with Remus. But he appreciated it all the same; Remus' advice made sense, and Sirius had assumed making things right with Isabella would force him out of his comfort zone. Just the thought of actually doing it, though…he sighed.

Remus smirked, as if aware of what Sirius had just been thinking. "It simply comes down to this: you either do it, or you don't. Getting Isabella back isn't guaranteed, but if you don't at least try, you'll never know." He then began fixing his sheets and pillows; Sirius took it as a dismissal.

"Thanks," Sirius murmured. But not wanting to come of as ungrateful, he added, "I really mean it, Moony. The easiest way isn't always the best way, and you're best at pointing that out to someone like me."

"You're welcome. Now let me get my rest." He pulled his covers back over him as Sirius closed the bed curtains again and went to his own bed.

Sirius changed into his pajamas and set his alarm for earlier than normal before climbing under his covers. He sustained his resolve for talking to Isabella by reminding himself of all of their cheerful times, how relaxed she made him feel, her smile, and lastly, for what is was worth, how jealous he had been at the prospect of her being Adam Cohen's girl, before his eyes fluttered shut from weariness.

When his clock blared what felt like only minutes later, he had half a mind to throw it out the window.

"Shut that damn thing up!"

Sirius recognized Peter's sleepy voice and was about to curse him before remembering why he had set it so early. He turned the alarm off, bounded out of bed, and headed for the bathroom. Peter was stirring, but Remus and Andy were silent behind their enclosed beds.

Wanting to start off right, Sirius put more effort into his grooming than he had been doing lately, something that he usually did not let slip. He relished in the warm water of the shower hitting his skin, letting it wash away his anxiety as he organized all the things he wanted to say to Isabella. The last thing he wanted was to come off as a blabbering lovesick fool. He wanted to let her know exactly how he felt about her, how he wanted to be with her, but not declare any false undying love, as Remus had warned him against. His skin was pink by the time he got out of the shower. He wrapped a towel around his waist and perused the cubby with his toiletries.

He had been skipping wearing his cologne lately, but after remembering how Isabella always melted in his arms whenever he wore the spice-scented concoction, he spritzed some on. Isabella also liked him a little scruffy, so instead of shaving, he trimmed and tidied his stubble. He then ran his hands through his hair to give it some form and headed back to the dormitory.

The sun was beaming through the tower windows by then, highlighting clear blue skies. Sirius took it as a good sign. He opened his wardrobe and chose the best pressed uniform. Lion-head cufflinks, his favorite pair, fastened his shirtsleeves; he hoped they would give him some Gryffindor courage to continue with this plan. He then packed his bag with bottles of butterbeer and treats from his trunk. The others finally began to stir, and James walked in just as he was putting on his robes.

"My, my. Don't you look dapper this morning."

Peter looked over to examine Sirius and lifted his brows; Remus grinned knowingly before disappearing into the bathroom.

"Of course. And you look terrible," Sirius threw back at James, but he frowned when he saw that his joke held somewhat true. James was paler than usual, the bags under his eyes that had appeared the morning after his alcohol poisoning persisted, and his clothes were hanging off him a little looser.

James shrugged. "No worse than you at the end of last summer." Peter guffawed loudly.

"Touché."

"No offense meant, mate," James said as he approached his bed. "You had your time to brood, so allow me mine." He looked at Sirius with a solemn expression. "You'll know when it's time to worry about me."

"True enough," Sirius agreed. He then grabbed his bag and set off for the door

"Dapper _and_ getting an early start to the day," Peter said as he scribbled on what looked like the Transfiguration essay due later today.

"Got big plans." Sirius grinned when Peter and James looked up questioningly. He didn't elaborate but headed out and down the stairs.

The common room was mostly empty and quiet. He stationed himself near the entrance of the girls' dormitories, wanting to catch Isabella as soon as she descended. Knowing that she wasn't typically an early riser, he was sure she hadn't left for the Great Hall yet.

But as the minutes passed and more students began to make their way to breakfast, Sirius began to grow apprehensive. He also knew Isabella was not the type to run late in the morning. And beyond that, none of her roommates had appeared. The girls who _had_ come down the stairs looked at him queerly as they passed.

Eventually, only 15 minutes remained until the first bell. Sirius was wondering if Isabella _had_ enjoyed an early breakfast today, of all days, when he caught Keira coming out the doorway to the girls' rooms, followed closely by her three roommates.

The sight of Isabella brought Sirius instant relief until he got a closer look at her. She, and the other three for that matter, looked haggard. In fact, they looked exactly how he and his friends felt after an all-night bender—disheveled hair, even messier uniforms, and unsteady gaits.

_But no, not _these_ girls…_

Sirius went unnoticed as they passed so he called out. "Isabella?"

As expected, all four of them turned towards his voice. Isabella was the last to find him. Her face didn't light up with delight at seeing him, but it didn't dissolve into a scowl, either; Sirius didn't know what to think of it. She raised her brows in question.

"I was wondering if we could talk…this morning…about us."

"No." Her voice was soft but just as flat as her expression. She turned and headed for the portrait hole, and her roommates followed. None bothered to give him a second look, except for Jane, whose smug smirk lingered until she disappeared.

Sirius stood there for a silent moment, shocked by the blunt rejection. The few students, mostly girls, who had witnessed the encounter finally left the common room, giggling and gossiping in whispers.

Yep, he had really done it this time. It felt just like their confrontation in the library months ago, and to rectify that, he had had to use a bit of cunning and creativity to gain her attention. It would take another wily plan to set things right, but Sirius was going to be more simple and direct this time. Isabella seemed not in the mood for games.

* * *

The pounding in Lily's head swelled with every step she took down the marble staircase. The Entrance Hall was nosier than ever, with friends greeting each other after two weeks apart and the excitement of starting the last term of the year. Lily knew she was sometimes paranoid, but it was obvious that many were looking her way.

She didn't know how she was going to get through this day. Drinking nearly half a bottle of firewhisky on her own had been a mistake, but a much welcomed one. After finding that note from Elias on her windowsill and falling apart, Lily tried to convince herself that she had seen the breakup coming, that besides their constant physical encounters, they were growing stagnant as a couple. It had done well enough to keep herself sane for the rest of the holiday, especially in front of her parents. But the end of their relationship had been made more real upon returning to school, and it hurt more than she thought it would have. Initial rebound or not, Elias had jolted some feeling and fun back into her life after Severus' crushing betrayal. He had been her boyfriend for most of the year, and now he wasn't. Firewhisky had dulled that painful awareness, but now it was punishing her.

A giggle and Elias' name drew Lily's attention to the door leading to the basement and the Hufflepuff common room as she reached the last step. It was Camille Laurent, her eyes filled with joy as she smiled at Elias, who was holding the door for her.

That was odd. Elias and Camille had retained civility after their own breakup, but Lily was sure she had never seen them act this chummy since then. They began walking towards the entrance to the Great Hall, when Elias saw Lily staring at him.

"Lily." His voice was neutral, but Lily wasn't sure what she had been expecting to hear—guilt, shock, pleasure? "I'm glad I ran into you. Can we talk?"

Part of Lily wanted to smack him. _'Glad I ran into you?'_ He had purposefully avoided seeing her all of yesterday.

She looked at Camille, who stood there carefully avoiding her eyes, before looking at Elias again. "Okay," she said, not sure if she had succeeded keeping control of her voice.

Elias smiled a silent goodbye to Camille before heading down the hallway to the abandoned classroom, and Lily followed. When they were inside, he set silent and locking charms. Lily couldn't help the rise of smugness within her; an Imperturbable would have done the trick, but Elias was never a star at Charms.

"I never meant to hurt you, Lily."

This was not how she had expected their conversation to start. Part of her was hoping he would open with a bit of pleading; another part of her wanted to feint as if none of this was affecting her, but Lily didn't have the faculties for that right now. Besides, it didn't help that Elias was as handsome as ever, with rough stubble covering his strong jaw and his perfectly pressed uniform highlighting the broadness of his shoulders.

"Well, you did, and I think I deserve, at the very least, an explanation of what the hell happened in Greece."

"Camille."

Lily nodded, her subconscious having realized that the moment she had seen them together.

"Her family happened to be vacationing there too," Elias continued. "But they were within the Wizarding locales, of course. Being a wizard and my family legally knowing about magic, they were allowed to accompany me on a tour of Wizarding Athens and the islands. Camille and I ran into each other, and…nothing happened at first. We were just shocked at the coincidence but eventually began hanging out and sightseeing. And the more we saw each other, the more it became apparent that…that maybe we had ended things a little too soon."

"I see." Lily's voice trembled, and she hated herself for it. Cheating on her with some nameless Grecian goddess would have been a lot more palatable than with his ex-girlfriend.

"It sort of just happened, before I realized what was happening. I thought writing you first would somehow absolve me from being a deceitful boyfriend, but I see now how foolish and self-serving that was."

"Yeah, it was," Lily said, a little steadier. An explanation was what she had asked for, but _this_ wasn't what she had wanted. Elias was being what Hufflupuff house embodied—true, fair, and reasonable—in his story. Not trying to make excuses, not promising anything he had no true intention to fulfill.

He also wasn't trying to win her back. And that hurt the most. He didn't want her, and probably hadn't for a long time.

"So you and Camille are—"

"Back together, yes." He looked at Lily apologetically; she could tell he was being sincere, but it did not matter. "I hoped to talk to you first when we got back to school, but Camille had written Grace, who was at home, in excitement, and Grace had shared it with whoever was still here and on the train. It was never my intention to embarrass you, have you or us be fodder for Hogwarts' gossip mill." He spread his hands contrition. "I obviously underestimated the people at this school."

"Yes, you did," Lily snapped, barely controlling her anger. She had been humiliated in front of most of the entire school once before, but they had felt sorry for her then, at being called a Mudblood by someone who had been a friend, by someone who many students already did not like.

But this time was different. Lily knew that a number of her classmates perceived her as unfriendly and prude just from the way she treated Potter; her boyfriend cheating on and leaving her for his ex-girlfriend would not help matters.

She wasn't arrogant enough to think herself unaffected by what people thought of her. Lily did care and knew she would be the subject of jokes and rumors for weeks. Just the thought of it all brought tears to her eyes and exacerbated the pain in her head. She felt herself falling into that same pit of insecure despair that had enveloped her after Severus abandoned her. It was embarrassing, and yet she was desperate to know why…

"Is there something wrong with me that…something that turns…that repels…" She sighed, feeling incredibly silly. "Nevermind. It's just better if you leave. I appreciate the truth, no matter how much it hurt hearing it."

Elias shook his head impatiently, rushing towards her with his arms out. "No, Lily, please don't think that. You are amaz—"

"Don't. Just stop." She swatted his arms away and stepped back, feeling sick with herself over her stupid dejection, for almost begging for approval and affection. "I don't want to hear your lies or platitudes."

Elias stared at her, looking unsure of what to say. He finally nodded and sighed, "Alright, well, then I'll see you around."

Lily felt some solace in the bit of guilt on his face and in his tone. What she didn't like was the hint of pity in his gaze before he dropped his eyes and walked past her out the door. She then sat motionless on the nearest desk for a long while, her mind reeling, the tears falling, her head hammering.

The last betrayal she had suffered had been thrown into her face everyday, from the absence of her former best friend and his skulking around the castle in the company of Slytherin monsters. Now another would be forced upon her in the form Elias and Camille holding hands and embracing in the halls and grounds. Even if they were respectful enough to consider her feelings and keep to themselves, there was no way the students would let her forget for a very long time. She would need to armor herself again, as she had done after Severus left her, but promoting that magnitude of indifference would take all of her concentration.

With the appeal of a drunken pity party pressing in the corner of her mind, Lily stood and headed out the classroom to the nearest loo. She splashed her face with cold water and performed a few charms on her red, puffy eyes, pallid complexion, and flat hair. Feeling a little better, she plastered on a smile and walked into the corridor.

The first bell had already rung and students were on their way to class. A few spotted her as she approached the marble staircase, and their looks and whispers to one another were enough to instantly deflate her falsely propped up confidence.

Lily sighed as she reached the landing, knowing better than to expect any different. It had been less than a week since Elias dumped her; pity parties were still justified.

She just hoped Jane had enough liquor for the week.

* * *

Friday night had not come soon enough for Isabella.

It had been a long week of getting back into the school mindset after the holiday. The break had been only two weeks, but perhaps the most mentally and physically draining one yet between starting off a week early with the funerals and then visiting her mother's grave, the disastrous wedding, and Sirius…

And she hadn't really recovered from the drinking binge on their first night back; neither had her roommates. They had finished the bottle of firewhisky and gone to bed very late. In the few precious hours between finally getting into bed and her alarm going off, Isabella's mind and emotions had raced and changed erratically between despair, hurt, apathy, anger, and longing—all acutely intensified by the alcohol coursing through her system.

And after her encounter with Sirius Monday morning, confusion was added to that list. She had rejected his offer to talk, so did that mean they were done? He had not approached her again since then, and neither had she made any effort reach out. They had not spoken to each other, had not looked at each other…though at times, Isabella swore she could feel his gaze on her when she was least likely to notice, like in class when he sat behind her.

Isabella didn't know what to think of it, didn't like the idea of them being done, over. It felt so unfinished. She wanted whatever was to happen to just happen already, but she'd be damned if she was going to make the first move. Yet even if Sirius did come groveling, she wasn't sure what she would say or do. Her body and her heart wanted one thing, her brain and fierce pride demanded another…

The common room had reached saturation point long ago, but Isabella was adamant about finishing this stupid Arithmancy homework. She and her roommates were sitting in a quieter corner, but it seemed no matter where you cloistered yourself, there were too many people around to feel truly isolated. On this side of the holiday, O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s were much closer for the fifth and seventh years and they were ever-present in the common room—many Isabella swore she had never seen before.

With the last problem finally complete, Isabella added her name with a flourish to the top left corner, rolled the parchment, and stuffed it away. She then pulled out the letter she had received from Lana and Jasmine this morning and reread it for what was probably the hundredth time. It was just full of too much good news. Lana and Tate were getting serious; Jasmine had finally started flirting with Jake. And most important of all, they were starting to plan their trip to visit her over the summer.

Isabella was just about to start her response when she saw Lily pack up her bag.

"Oh good, someone else is stopping for the night. I didn't want to seem like the only one giving up a ripe Friday night to sleep."

Lily huffed. "I've been dreaming of it all week."

Isabella understood; no one wanted to put this past week behind her more than Lily.

"And I'll be joining you," Jane said, standing and throwing her bag over her shoulder.

That had certainly had caught Isabella off guard; no one made the most of Friday nights more than Jane. Isabella's doubt must have showed on her face.

"What? I'm allowed to be tired too."

Isabella only shrugged and looked to Keira. "Will you be joining us?"

Keira didn't even look up from her Ancient Runes paper. "Meeting Remus later."

"See you in the morning, then," Lily said, already heading towards the stairs.

Keira stuck out her tongue but continued with her work.

When they entered their dormitory a few minutes later, Isabella's bed instantly caught her attention for reasons other than being tired.

"Why are my curtains closed?"

"Huh?" Lily looked around. "I bet a house-elf was probably in a rush or distracted while making your bed and closed them without thinking. They do that sometimes."

"Oh." Isabella dropped her bag at the foot of her bed before rounding to the far end. She began to pull the hangings open when an anxious face appeared with a finger at its lips. She jumped back with a gasp that she hastily turned into a cough. This was certainly something she could not draw attention to.

"Everything all right?" Lily called.

"Ye—yeah. Just accosted by a bit of dust." She then glared at Sirius, who had opened the curtains a little more to fully reveal himself kneeling on her bed. Every emotion from Sunday night returned, but fury trumped them all.

"Get out," she spat, barely audible.

Sirius swallowed and raised his hands defensively. "We need to talk first."

"_Get out_."

"And start World War III when Evans sees me leaving? Neither of us wants that."

Isabella had known that from the moment she saw his handsome, infuriating face appear from behind her curtains. She clenched her jaw and closed her eyes, trying to calm herself and think fast.

She began to rummage through the mess on her bedside table for extra noise while whispering through barely moving lips. "It'll look fishy if I leave the curtains closed. Disillusion yourself, get under the bed, and don't make a sound, don't even _breathe_ until I summon you. We'll wait until the girls are in their own beds before getting you out of here."

Sirius nodded, but that grin on his stupid face told Isabella that he had much to say before leaving.

She tried to ignore what it could mean while she retrieved her pajamas; she didn't expose her bed and head to the bathroom until Sirius was concealed underneath.

It wasn't until she was under the blast of hot water that the situation finally hit her, and as always when it came to Sirius, she was conflicted.

Sirius waiting for her in her bed? Well, that was a no-brainer. He was an unbearable prick at times, but he was still the most gorgeous guy in school with wonderfully attentive lips and hands. If this had been just one week ago, she would have thrown herself into his arms, set an Imperturbable, and let the night and their imaginations take them away.

That impulse was still there, but it had been tempered by the desire to throttle him. The last two weeks had forced her to question _again_ why she was insistent on seeing this through. No other boy had ever caused such a battling dichotomy within her; she wouldn't have put up with it. Garret had been the picture perfect boyfriend, and she had _loved_ him for it. She wasn't one of those girls who got bored when things were too safe or structured, but it appeared that she wasn't adverse to a little craziness either.

The fact that Sirius had gone through the trouble to somehow get into their dormitory again was telling. Isabella had the feeling that if he had intended on ending things with her, his attempt to talk to her on Monday morning would have been his last.

But it wasn't. Sirius _was_ here now waiting for her. She wanted to smile at the thought, but his presumption made her angry.

With one last rinse of her hair, she turned off the shower and wrapped herself in her favorite robe. She had purposefully taken a long time in hopes that Lily and Jane would finish and head to bed; luck was on her side.

Standing at the sink, it took a moment for Isabella to realize that she was using the French toiletries she had bought for her birthday; the pajamas she had grabbed were the royal blue silk camisole and panties. She shook her head.

_Well,_ she thought wryly,_ there's no question on what my body wants._

But she put the lotion away and retied her robe without putting on the silk underthings. She could not afford to show her hand so blatantly, despite what her body wanted. She tied her hair back and walked into the dormitory. Lily and Jane were quiet and concealed within their beds; she sent up another silent prayer in thanks. She then changed into a t-shirt and shorts and climbed into bed, closed her curtains, set an Imperturbable charm, and reached down to gesture at Sirius. An outline of a shadow clambered up with its wand already lit. Isabella moved back to sit against her pillows as Sirius reversed the Disillusionment charm.

He was still in his uniform, but his tie was gone. His hair was a perfect mess, and she could smell the delicious spice aroma of his cologne. Wand light and mischief sparkled in his grey eyes, and a grin tugged at his lips. Isabella wanted to ravish and punch him at the same time.

"You are too bold."

"I think of it as extremely clever."

"Whatever you call it doesn't matter. Jane and Lily are asleep, or at least closed behind their hangings enough not to notice anything. I would ask how exactly you got up here, but I assume you won't tell me like last time. Regardless, you found a way in, so you can find your way back out. Leave."

Sirius stared at her, his mouth half open. "You don't want to talk about us?"

"I _did_," Isabella said, trying to maintain her frosty demeanor despite her racing heart. "I wanted to talk the night of the wedding; I sent letters to the Potters' home and Hogwarts; I wanted to talk Sunday night after returning, but you completely ignored me."

"I left a note for you."

Anger flared in Isabella again. "Oh, you mean your _summons_? I am not a fucking dog, Sirius."

He smiled at that, but quickly straightened his face. "You know I would never insinuate such a thing."

"Why are you here?"

Sirius' eyes widened at the abrupt change in subject. "Like I said, I want to talk about us."

"Is there an 'us?'" Sirius made to respond, but Isabella continued. "Because before my father dragged me home from the Potters', you said that you had rushed into this."

"Yes, and it was the truth, but then I realized that it didn't matter, because I wanted to make it work. That's why I came after you, if you recall."

"But then my father stepped in. That still doesn't explain why you ignored me for the rest of the holiday or when we returned to school."

"And I'm sorry about that. I don't have an excuse for that except maybe frustration. But towards the end of the holiday I had to be there for James." All of the smugness left Sirius' features. "We went to visit his mother at the ministry before they reversed the curse; she tried to kill him."

"_What_?" The story about James' mother had finally broke in the _Prophet_ this week, but it had said nothing about reversing the spell or James visiting her. The Ministry must have finally been able to exert some control over the publication.

Sirius shook his head. "Don't need to talk about it now. Look, Isabella I am _here_. I want this."

Isabella wanted to believe him, but…"What makes this time any different from before, from the morning of my birthday, from the morning you asked me to be your girl?"

Sirius was silent for a long time, staring up at the dark canopy. Isabella, her nerves taught and her breath shallow, was about to suggest he leave again when he finally spoke.

"I was afraid to let you in because you've seen me at my worst this year, at my lowest. And unexpectedly at that—you weren't supposed to see me that day I left home, or know of those nights James and I sat up in the common room, or be the one I went to after hearing about Clarice, or witness and _care_ about the anguish between me and Regulus. Remus and Peter don't even know the extent of how rubbish this year has been for me, but _you_ do. And why? I mean, I didn't know you. You were just some American bird who had come here and inserted yourself into my life."

Isabella snapped her eyes sharply at him, but he still wasn't looking at her.

"Not intentionally, though," he added quickly, appearing to have sensed her irritation. "It just—" he rubbed his face with his free hand in frustration "—it just pissed me off. Especially because I…liked you. I mean I do; I still do."

Sirius was now looking at her so intensely that it made her breath catch. She was desperate to know what his words meant. He took a deep breath and continued.

"But if this situation with Clarice, this stupid war, has taught me anything, it's that this world is too unpredictable to push away those who are important to you, to take them for granted. And I know that I need to make up my mind before I push you right out of my reach, like how I did earlier. I can't promise that things will be perfect, but I do promise to make a better effort. If you're still interested."

Isabella felt herself falling for him all over again, but she tried desperately to reign in her feelings. "I feel like we're in a time warp. This sounds too familiar."

"I know, which is why we need to talk about expectations. We list exactly what we need or expect of each other to ensure there is no confusion later, since that seems to be an issue with us."

"Expectations…this sounds entirely too mature for you," Isabella said through a smile.

Sirius looked guilty through his own smile. "Remus might have given me some advice."

"Ah, I see. Well, just to clarify, I never was confused about what we were. You asked me to be your girlfriend, I said yes, but then you decided that you could still push me away whenever you felt like it."

"It got to be too much sometimes, with everything else going on, and then you wanting to spend every minute together—"

"Excuse me?" Isabella said indignantly. "'Every minute?' I never asked for that, never expected that. Do you not remember the conversation we had at The Three Broomsticks the day we snuck out to Hogsmeade? Girls at Morgana didn't get to spend every waking moment with their boyfriends, so I don't expect to do it here. You assumed I wanted that, possibly to give yourself an excuse to write me off as just another idiot, clingy girlfriend when you got bored with me."

Sirius visibly swallowed. "I didn't—No, you're right. When I felt you getting too close…" He cleared his throat. "So, so what _do_ you expect of me?"

Isabella thought for a minute. "Well, I expect you to hold my hand if we're walking down a corridor together, and I don't think asking to sit together in Arithmancy is too much. When I'm upset, I hope you'll be there to listen to me, and if we happen to be in the same vicinity but not together, I trust that you would at least acknowledge me. I'd like to have meals often, _not always_, and I would like to spend _some_ evenings just the two of us. When you need some time alone with your friends, I want you to simply tell me that, instead of just disappearing without a word after class, not to be seen or heard from until the next night at dinner. And I expect to be kissed often."

"That won't be a problem," Sirius replied with his trademark grin. He sat on his knees and leaned in to kiss her, but she held out an arm.

"Is there anything you expect of me?"

Sirius sat back, looking a bit annoyed. "To not reject me when I do try to show you a little affection."

"The _one_ time I rejected you was because we were in the _common room_, so that's another thing—I'd hope that you realize that as you are my boyfriend, I _do want you_. Anything you perceive as a rejection isn't one, and that there would be a damn good reason I push your eager hands away."

"Understood," Sirius said, somewhat grudgingly. "I guess I need you to understand that a lot about my family and brother is stuff I am still working through and I'm not always willing to talk about it. And it's not just with you, James and the others too, so don't take offense if I refuse to talk to you about any of it."

Isabella nodded; she had expected that. "Anything else?"

"Not really, I think you covered most of it. Oh, and that we both go directly to each other if we have a problem."

"Ok. So, now that we've established expectations, what next?"

Sirius spread his hands. "Clean slate. In the morning, we start again, and on the right foot this time."

"In the morning…meaning…"

He raised his brows and grinned. "Meaning anything we do now won't count."

"Anything," Isabella repeated, her mind racing. As if on instinct, she moved towards him before she realized what she was doing. He automatically pulled her into his lap and kissed her hard. His tongue slipped past her lips, and he devoured her. She met his every move; her hands moving to unbutton his shirt while his hands lifted hers up over her head. A guttural moan escaped his lips at her exposed breasts, a sound that sent shivers up Isabella's spine.

Knowing she was falling into dangerous territory, she lied back and pulled him on top of her. Her hands roamed over his chest, warm, lean, and hard. His lips left hers and peppered kisses along her jaw and down her neck until he found the spot that always made her body sizzle with electricity, biting and sucking the delicate skin as her pulse raced beneath it.

"Your scent is…your birthday…"

One arm propped himself over her, while his free hand worked at both breasts, pulling and twisting the tender nipples until they peaked. She arched into his hand, desperate for _more_, and as if reading her mind, Sirius trailed his lips down her collarbone and drew a breast into his mouth, licking and nipping with admiration and mania. His hand covered the other, continuing to tease the sensitive nub, and Isabella sighed his name with a satisfaction that relayed everything and hid nothing. Sirius moved his mouth to her other breast in response and moaned when Isabella moved her leg against his hard erection pressing insistently onto her thigh.

His hand grazed down her stomach, leaving goosebumps in its wake. The muscles in her stomach quivered and hot blood pooled and pulsed between her legs as his fingers edged under the waistband of her shorts. Her mind immediately went back to the first time he had touched her like this, the expert work of his fingers, the lightning intensity of her orgasm, how wantonly she had almost given her entire self to him—she wanted that all again, but…

"Wait." Isabella's voice was shaking, but she grabbed Sirius' wrist before it slipped into her panties. When he raised his head, his eyes full of question, she said, "I think it best that we stop for now."

Sirius' gaze turned from confusion to disbelief. "Stop?"

Isabella smiled at the innocence in his voice; he sounded like a five-year-old who had been told the Quidditch World Cup this year was cancelled.

"Stop," she affirmed, though she could not deny her own disappointment when his tongue left her skin.

He looked as if he were going to question her again, but he closed his eyes and swallowed as he sat up and removed his hand, seeming to remember what she had said about rejecting him. When he opened them, his eyes immediately fell to her breasts again. He licked his lips before finding her face; desire surged through her body again.

"I want you."

The breath halted in her throat at his stark candor, more than he had ever shown with her. "I know."

"And you want me."

Isabella almost frowned at that; she feared she would be forever exposed when it came to Sirius. "Yes."

He stared at her, his breath quick and heavy, his expression conveying wonder at why she would possibly stop this. Eventually, a resigned grin played at his lips. "You're such an insufferable tease."

"I know," Isabella said as she sat up, pleased at the way his eyes followed her bouncing breasts, "but we start over in the morning. You have to forgive me."

Sirius chuckled as he began buttoning his shirt. Isabella watched his deft fingers longingly, wanting them on her skin and between her legs again, but she shook her head. She had to reestablish some sense of control with this new beginning. However…unlike the last time, she now knew exactly what it felt like to give Sirius part of herself, and stopping these instances weren't going to get any easier.

_But it won't be for much longer_, Isabella thought with a rush of excitement. Sirius was right—she _did_ want him and wanted to share the most intimate part of herself with him. That time was closer than ever before, but not tonight. They needed this fresh start first.

"Indeed," Sirius muttered. "I, uh, should go."

"And take a cold shower?" she asked, his arousal still bulging impressively in his pants.

"No." His eyes met hers with a frank boldness that made her blush.

"Well, then, promise you'll think of me." She moved forward to kiss him with barely constrained want. When she felt him starting to press her backwards again, she reasserted herself and broke this kiss. "Goodnight, Sirius."

"Goodnight." And before she could cover herself and walk him out, he jumped through the curtains and was gone, and she was left in darkness. There was no sound of the door opening or closing. Isabella thought about following after him to discover his trickery on the stairs, but she instead gave in to the tingling lingering on her lips and skin, the persistent throbbing in her center, and the secure knowledge that Sirius was _hers_.

"Just a little more patience, Sirius, I promise," she whispered as one hand squeezed a breast and the other slipped into the warm slickness between her legs.


End file.
